12.6.18 Boulder Weekly

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I’m Retiring Soon

NEWS:

Amid both optimism and concern, federal tax incentive program could bring development to distressed Boulder County neighborhoods

by Angela K. Evans

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BOULDERGANIC:

The ins and outs of a Colorado family honey-producing operation

by Emma Walker

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ADVENTURE:

When you’re not a semi-pro athlete like everyone else in Colorado, what do you do?

by Annie Murlowski

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BUZZ:

Dioramas: the theater of science and discovery

by Sarah Haas

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NIBBLES:

Visiting local oases of chocalate, pastries, cheese and food fun

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COMMUNITY TABLE:

Mateo’s Matthew Jansen opens a new restaurant in Gunbarrel

by Matt Cortina

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departments 5 THE HIGHROAD: Free the free press from Wall Street plunderers 7 DANISH PLAN: Macron and les deplorables 8 GUEST COLUMN: Opportunity zones: who benefits?

9 LETTERS: Signed, sealed, delivered, your views 27 OVERTONES: John Craigie delivers poignant folk messages with comic flare 29 ARTS & CULTURE: Everything classical for the holidays 31 BOULDER COUNTY EVENTS: What to do and where to go 38 WORDS: ‘Frostbite’ by Elizabeth Robinson 39 FILM: ‘Roma’ is a tour de force of cinematic storytelling 41 THE TASTING MENU: Four courses to try in and around Boulder County 47 DRINK: New in brew: Bell’s Brewery & Brooklyn Brewery 55 ASTROLOGY: by Rob Brezsny 57 SAVAGE LOVE: Cringe and purge 59 WEED BETWEEN THE LINES: Kosher cannabis 61 CANNABIS CORNER: For yuppies, pot is ceasing to be a guilty pleasure Boulder Weekly

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Publisher, Stewart Sallo Associate Publisher, Fran Zankowski Director of Operations/Controller, Benecia Beyer Circulation Manager, Cal Winn EDITORIAL Editor, Joel Dyer Managing Editor, Matt Cortina Senior Editor, Angela K. Evans Arts and Culture Editor, Caitlin Rockett Special Editions Editor, Emma Murray Contributing Writers, Peter Alexander, Dave Anderson, Will Brendza, Rob Brezsny, Michael J. Casey, Paul Danish, Sarah Haas, Jim Hightower, Dave Kirby, John Lehndorff, Rico Moore, Amanda Moutinho, Leland Rucker, Dan Savage, Josh Schlossberg, Alan Sculley, Ryan Syrek, Mariah Taylor, Christi Turner, Betsy Welch, Tom Winter, Gary Zeidner SALES AND MARKETING Retail Sales Manager, Allen Carmichael Account Executives, Julian Bourke, Matthew Fischer Market Development Manager, Kellie Robinson Advertising Assistant, Jennifer Elkins Mrs. Boulder Weekly, Mari Nevar PRODUCTION Art Director, Susan France Senior Graphic Designer, Mark Goodman Graphic Designer, Daisy Bauer Assistant to the Publisher Julia Sallo CIRCULATION TEAM Dave Hastie, Dan Hill, George LaRoe, Jeffrey Lohrius, Elizabeth Ouslie, Rick Slama 18-Year-Old, Mia Rose Sallo Cover photo, Johnny Woods December 6, 2018 Volume XXVI, Number 17 As Boulder County's only independently owned newspaper, Boulder Weekly is dedicated to illuminating truth, advancing justice and protecting the First Amendment through ethical, no-holdsbarred journalism and thought-provoking opinion writing. Free every Thursday since 1993, the Weekly also offers the county's most comprehensive arts and entertainment coverage. Read the print version, or visit www.boulderweekly.com. Boulder Weekly does not accept unsolicited editorial submissions. If you're interested in writing for the paper, please send queries to: editorial@boulderweekly.com. Any materials sent to Boulder Weekly become the property of the newspaper.

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Boulder Weekly

the

Highroad Free the free press from Wall Street plunderers

by Jim Hightower

A

two-panel cartoon I recently saw showed a character with a sign saying: “First they came for the reporters.” In the next panel, his sign says: “We don’t know what happened after that.”

It was, of course, a retort to Donald Trump’s ignorant campaign to demonize the news media as “the enemy of the people.” But when it comes to America’s once-proud newspapers, their worst enemy is not Trump — nor is it the rising cost of newsprint or the “free” digital news on websites. Rather, the demise of the real

news reporting by our city and regional papers is a product of their profiteering owners. Not the families and companies that built and nurtured true journalism, but the new breed of fast-buck hucksters who’ve scooped up hundreds of America’s newspapers from the bargain bins of media sell-offs.

The buyers are hedge-fund scavengers with names like Digital First and GateHouse. They know nothing about journalism and could care less, for they’re ruthless Wall Street profiteers out to grab big bucks fast by slashing the journalistic

For more information on Jim Hightower’s work — and to subscribe to his award-winning monthly newsletter, The Hightower Lowdown — visit www.jimhightower.com.

and production staffs of each paper, voiding all employee benefits (from pensions to free coffee in the breakroom), shriveling the paper’s size and news content, selling the presses and other assets, tripling the price of their inferior product — then declaring bankruptcy, shutting down the paper, and auctioning off the bones before moving on to plunder another town’s paper.

By 2014, America’s two largest media chains were not venerable publishers who believe that a newspaper’s mission includes a commitment to truth and a civic responsibility, but GateHouse and Digital First, whose managers believe that good journalism is measured by the personal profit they can squeeze from it. As revealed last year in an American Prospect see HIGHROAD Page 6

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highroad HIGHROAD from Page 5

article, GateHouse executives had nalistic resources to truth-telling. demanded that its papers cut $27 million But local ownership matters, as from their operating expenses. Thousands some 1,500 of our towns have learned of newspaper employees suffered that after Wall Street’s corporate demigods $27-million cut in large part because one of greed have swept in without warning employee — the hedge fund’s CEO — to seize their paper, gut its journalistic had extracted $54 million in personal pay mission, and devour its assets. For from the conglomerate, including an example, Digital Media, a huge private$11-million bonus. equity profiteer, snatched the St. Paul To these absentee owners and operaPioneer Press and, demanding a ridicutors, our newspapers lous 25-percent are just mines, entiprofit margin from tling them to its purchase, TO THESE extract enormous stripped the newsABSENTEE financial wealth and room staff from a social well-being high of 225 jourowners and from our communinalists to 25. operators, our ties.

As Robert newspapers are just The core idea of Kuttner reported, the “civic commons” these tyrannical mines, entitling them is that we are a selfprivate equity to extract enormous governing people, firms are paper capable of creating constructs that wealth and social and sustaining a produce nothing well-being from our society based on but profits for farcommunities. common good. away speculators.

A noble aspiraHe notes that the tion! blandly named But achieving it entities only exist requires a basic level of communi“thanks to three loopholes in the law” ty-wide communication — a reliable — the first lets them operate in the resource that digs out and shares truths dark, the second provides an unlimited so people know enough about what’s tax deduction for the massive amounts going on to be self-governing. This is the of money they borrow to buy up newspapers, and the third allows them to role Americans have long expected their profit by intentionally bankrupting the local and regional newspapers to play — paper they take over. papers that are not merely in our comOur right to a free press is meaningmunities, but of, by and for them. less if Wall Street thieves destroy our Of course, being profit-seeking enticommunities’ presses. The good news is ties, that are usually enmeshed in the local moneyed establishment, papers have that many enterprising people are devising ways to rescue their newspapers. For commonly (and often infamously) fallen more information, go to dfmworkers. far short of their noble democratic purorg. pose. Overall though, a town’s daily (or, This opinion column does not necessarily better yet, two or more dailies) makes for reflect the views of Boulder Weekly. a more robust civic life by devoting jourBoulder Weekly

danish plan Macron and les deplorables by Paul Danish

F

rench President Emmanuel Macron returned to Paris from the G20 Summit, where he reaffirmed France’s commitment to the Paris Climate Accord, to discover a rebellion against it underway in Paris.

Hundreds of thousands ran riot in the capital and protested throughout the country, more than 400 were arrested in Paris alone, more than 260 were injured, and two were killed... streets blocked, shops attacked, graffiti painted on the Arc de Triomphe, water canon turned on crowds, and so on.

The cause of the rebellion was an increase in the national gas and diesel tax — that was imposed explicitly to combat global warming by reducing driving.

You couldn’t ask for a better juxtopositon of the disconnect between how the Global Climate Consensus perceives global warming and how, uh, les deplorables (aka more than 75 percent of France’s population) see it.

The tax amounts to about 30 cents a gallon on already heavily taxed diesel, raising the price of a gallon of the fuel to around $7. There was a smaller increase in the tax on gasoline, but diesel is the more commonly used fuel in France.

It might seem odd that a 5-percent tax increase on diesel would set off a mushrooming national rebellion that shows signs of turning into a revolution, but then in 1773 the Tea Tax (three pence a pound) didn’t seem like all that much either — to the Brits, that is.

And there’s nothing odd about the pushback Macron got when you consider: Existing taxes in France add up to 45 percent of the country’s GDP, the highest in the Western World.

The median income in the country is 20,520€, or $23,000 a year. This means that half the French live on 1,710€ ($1,946) a month. Five million people are surviving on less than 855€ ($973) a month. While paying $7 a gallon for gas. (The figures come from Guy Milliere, a professor at the University of Paris.)

Add to that the fact that Macron has the political skills of Marie Antoinette, or worse, Hillary Clinton.

According to Milliere, he once Boulder Weekly

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referred to the female employees of a bankrupt company as “illiterates,” made a distinction in a speech between “those who succeed and those who are nothing,” told a young man who spoke of his distress at trying to find a job that all he had to do was move and “cross the street,” and that his fellow countrymen were “Gauls resistant to change.”

Some journos are characterizing the protests as a “rural versus urban” thing, with les deplorables being the rurals, who are dependent on their cars, while the well-off urbans can use public transportation.

They may have a point, but that doesn’t explain the fact that several polls have shown the Yellow Vest Movement (Mouvement des Gilets Jaunes) has the support of more than 75 percent of the country.

Pundits all over the world are writing columns about the “deeper” grievances in France that led to the protests — everything from the high cost of living, high unemployment, low economic growth, immigration, and so on.

It’s the fuel tax, stupid.

The reason “solutions” to global warming like Macron’s fuel tax are furiously rejected by les deplorables isn’t because the deplorables are ignorant or self-absorbed or have other grievances.

It’s because the sacrifices they’re being asked to make offer no visible solution to the problem.

The tax will produce no discernable difference in the climate, because in addition to the warming that is baked in due to the carbon dioxide released since the start of the industrial revolution, tens of billions more tons of greenhouse gases will be released annually for decades, until current fossil fuel energy production is phased out (if ever, that is).

Les deplorables will pay the tax — that Macron announced will go up every year — and the world will keep getting warmer. The best the proponents of the tax can say in its defense is that the world will keep getting warmer less quickly — for centuries. That’s not exactly the kind of vision that wins taxpayer hearts and minds.

Then there’s the matter of the tax being explicitly anti-automobile.

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December 6 , 2018 7

guest column Opportunity zones: Who benefits?

by Leonard May

T

he 2017 tax bill provides for the creation of “Opportunity Zones” (OZs) — economically distressed communities where as a result of investment in said communities, investors’ capital gains will be sheltered from taxes. Investors stand to pay as little as zero taxes on profits from OZ investments if held for 10 years. The ostensible purpose of OZs is to incentivize investment in these struggling communities.

In theory, OZs are a good idea in that they potentially direct capital toward areas of need (struggling communities) that otherwise cannot not attract needed investment.

In theory.

But when they direct capital and investment to areas that are not suffering from a dearth of capital availability or investment (Boulder is hardly a struggling community), they are taking a finite resource (capital) away from areas that don’t otherwise have a way of accessing that resource.

OZs, being a get-out-of-jail-free card from paying capital gains taxes, is a transfer of public money to the pockets of hedge funds and other investors, who don’t need it, at the expense of programs that support ordinary people, such a social services, schools, transit, carbon reduction, affordable housing, etc.

In other words, if not appropriately applied, opportunity zones will just be

more of the same corporate welfare characterizing the trickle-down economic policies of the past 40 years and more of the same flow of capital to people and communities at the top of the economic ladder at the expense of everyone else.

In terms of sound economic policy, is this a direction Boulder wants to support, where cheap capital in the form of tax-giveaways to investors and hedge funds rather than community needs, drives development, which leads to bubbles, which ultimately will burst?

Just look at Turkey’s current economic meltdown.

There have been trillions of dollars of cheap money circulating in international markets over the past 10 years as a result of low interest rates (arising from the 2008 financial crisis). The result was that it became very easy for governments and companies in economies like Turkey’s, to borrow money.

So, Turkish real estate developers and the Erdogan government took advantage of that cheap money to pay for many projects that did not have sound economic basis.

Erdogan built his political base on undertaking gigantic public works projects like mosques, airports and bridges, as well as facilitating big private sector projects that included flashy housing developments, office towers and shopsee GUEST COLUMN Page 9

danish plan DANISH PLAN from Page 7

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The automobile is one of the most potent instruments of personal empowerment and liberation ever put in the hands of ordinary people. And Macron wants to take that empowerment and freedom away, in pursuit of a policy that won’t produce results for centuries.

No wonder les deplorables want his head (which in France is a fraught metaphor).

Last Tuesday, Macron suspended the fuel tax for six months, in the hopes that would cool things down, so to speak. He would have been better off cancelling it; the suspension is more

likely to cause the Gilets Jaunes to double down. We’ll see this weekend.

Granted, the French seem to stage this sort of rebellion every 50 years or so, but American environmentalists who airily call for a carbon tax should still take the Gilets Jaunes movement as a cautionary tale.

Global warming may or may not be settled science, but it most emphatically isn’t settled politics. And that’s an inconvenient truth that can’t be ignored.

This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

Boulder Weekly

letters Solving poverty in the U.S. Thanks to Jim Hightower for pointing out the absurdity of the recent “poverty is over” announcement (Re: “Have you heard the news? Poverty is over!”, The Highroad, Nov. 29, 2018). For one in five children, one in seven seniors, and millions of other Americans who live in poverty, this is a slap in the face.

But each of us can speak up to make a difference, calling for full funding of the SNAP program and an attack on the causes of poverty in the richest country in the world. Our calls, letters, and visits to those who represent us in Congress can help turn this around.

Organizations like RESULTS (results. org) help people learn to be effective advocates and take actions end poverty in our nation.

Willie Dickerson/via internet

On organic crop insurance Will Brendza wrote an interesting piece titled, “Boulder County’s reported 80 percent farm failure rate doesn’t tell the full story.” (Re: Boulderganic, Nov. 29, 2018).

He writes “And since the U.S. Dep’t of Agriculture doesn’t offer crop insurance for most organic produce farming, severe and unpredictable weather can

make or break these farms.” This is not completely accurate.

The USDA does offer crop insurance for organic farmers — see rma. usda.gov/news/currentissues/organics.

Why an organic farmer chooses to participate or not merits its own discussion.

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On synagogue shooting The Rocky Mountain Peace and Justice Center deplores and opposes all forms of violence, racism, and oppression. We are deeply horrified by massacre of Jews at the Pittsburgh synagogue. We send our heartfelt sympathies to the families and friends of the victims and to everyone who feels threatened by anti-semitism. Violent anti-semitism has taken an enormous toll on human beings over many centuries and in all parts of the world.

Unfortunately hatred of Jews is by no means dead and must be firmly resisted wherever it occurs. The RMPJC also deplores the ongoing targeting and killing of people of color, LGBTQ, immigrants and all other people targeted by violence.

Betty Ball/Rocky Mountain Peace and Justice Center

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GUEST COLUMN from Page 8

ping malls that Turkey could not afford.

It created a bubble, which is bursting. Now, many of those new subdivisions are sitting vacant, without buyers (between 1.4 million and 2 million units) and Turkey is in danger of defaulting on its huge debt. If Turkey defaults on its loans, you have the kernel of a new international financial crisis.

Why is this relevant to Boulder?

Because the misallocation of capital to build unneeded projects just because capital is plentiful and cheap, is ultimately harmful to the economy and people. It just repeats the mistakes of the 2008 financial crisis and multiple other burstings of speculative bubbles that were built on cheap money.

Boulder ought not to be adding fuel to this fire and certainly not when, as it appears, City Council and community stakeholders (other than the Chamber of Commerce) were largely unaware that Boulder participated in this program.

There is however, a City need that could potentially be addressed with Boulder Weekly

OZs — housing that is permanently affordable to middle income and lower households.

If the areas designated as OZs were to be rezoned, shifting development potential from commercial to residential, the City will be reducing the primary demand driver for housing and thus the primary source of pricing pressure — the increase in workers associated with increased commercial development — while simultaneously accessing of a new source of capital for the purpose of addressing a broader community need.

If the result of these areas’ redevelopment could be mandated to be predominantly housing that is permanently affordable to middle income and lower households, multiple benefits would be derived for the larger community.

Before grabbing at the OZ goody bag, City Council should establish that a greater good is served and make it clear who Council and the City serve.

As it seems now, the beneficiaries of OZs appear to be a select few.

This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

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news

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Opportunity Knocks Amid both optimism and concern, federal tax incentive program could bring development to distressed Boulder County neighborhoods

by Angela K. Evans

W

alk into the indoor mall at Diagonal Plaza on any given weekday and it’ll most likely be empty. Gutted restaurants and gated storefronts line the hall, as a few people mill about outside the DMV Driver’s License Office, waiting for their turn in line. A clock repair shop looks like it still gets some business. A brightly decorated eyebrow threading studio has a handful of customers.

And that’s about it. In the parking lot, scaffolding surrounds the newly opened Walgreens that replaced Rite Aid. Both a Sports Authority and Walmart Neighborhood Market sit shuttered.

Situated on the southeastern corner of Iris Avenue and 28th Street in Boulder, the 33-acre Diagonal Plaza commercial center is ripe for redevelopment, which has proved elusive for years. Now, at least some economic development officials within the city and the state are hoping a federal tax incentive program can change that.

In April, the area was designated under the federal Opportunity Zone program, intended to spur growth in economically distressed communities around the country as 10 December 6, 2018

Situated on the corner of Iris Avenue and 28th Street in Boulder, the Diagonal Plaza is ripe for redevelopment as many of the storefronts sit gated and empty.

part of the sweeping tax reforms heralded by President Donald Trump and passed late last year as the 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act. While the program is seen as a huge opportunity, for lack of a better word, by the state and the pro-development community in Boulder County, the designation in the City of Boulder has also drawn scrutiny from those who think it will only exacerbate affordability and equity issues, including some City Council members. Longmont and Lafayette also have designated opportunity zones and specific plans to leverage them, though it appears Boulder does not yet.

Uncertainty remains about the level of impact opportunity zone investments can and/or will have on local communities. “This whole thing is an incentive offered by the

federal government, but not a classic program that the treasury might offer [where] there’d be a fixed budget and you’d know how it would be allocated among projects,” says Jeff Kraft, director, Business Funding and Incentives at the Colorado Office of Economic Development and International Trade (OEDIT), which led the initiative for the state’s opportunity zone designations.

“This is a self-selected investment that [investors] claim on [their] taxes.”

Under the new law, investors have 180 days to roll capital gains over into new and unrelated investments — stock can be sold to invest in real estate projects, real estate can be sold to be used in a venture capital fund, etc. — through the use of “opportunity zone funds,” which have to significantly invest in designated opportunity zones. Qualifying investments include real estate projects as well as investing in local businesses and start-ups. (Under the draft regulations, a minimum of 63 percent of an opportunity Boulder Weekly

Longmont is hoping to draw investment for the redevelopment of the abandoned sugar mill on the eastern edge of town with its opportunity zone designation.

zone fund must be invested in a designated zone, according to the Tax Foundation.) The investor then gets to defer federal taxes until either they sell the investment or Dec. 31, 2026, whichever comes first. If they’ve had the investment for at least five years by 2026, they essentially get a 10 percent discount. If they’ve had it for seven years, they get 15 percent. In other words, “To get the maximum financial incentive to the private entity, the fund has to do its investment by the end of 2019,” Kraft says.

What’s more, if they keep that investment for 10 years or more, they are exempt from future capital gains taxes on that investment altogether.

All of which initiates a pretty fast timeline for investors, and the state is encouraging municipalities to develop community-informed plans for what they want in any given opportunity zone in order to attract national capital and attract it fast.

“It’s important to get going and maximize the benefits that this can drive,” Kraft says. “While we think it’s important to take advantage and attract the maximum tax breaks and incentivize capital, there’s still chances for investments to occur for the next eight or nine years.”

Cities and local jurisdictions do have some say over what and how development will occur in the zones, as nothing in the law precludes local land use, zoning and permitting regulations. But it is largely a market-driven program that offers tax breaks to investors while, in theory at least, also providing some sort of social benefit.

“I believe commercial real estate can be a driver for social and environmental equity,” says Peter Vitale, a Boulder Planning Board member who works for Stantec, the commercial real estate and design firm responsible for the Pearl Street Mall. “Now, there’s an opportunity to go even deeper and be even more ambitious with projects that are designed to serve the community. Hopefully, this will inspire those developers to do that.”

Nationally, investments in some opportunity zones are already on the rise, spiking by 80 percent since the law passed, while non-opportunity zone investments have decreased, although minutely, according to an analysis by the Wall Street Journal. And investment in these areas has the potential to grow, as only draft regulations from the Department of Treasury have been released to date.

“We’re looking at them and we have folks who Boulder Weekly

have capital gains right now who that could be an option for them,” says Elias Bachmann, an investment advisor with BSW Wealth in Boulder. “We’ve been hesitant to really go great guns to our clients [with opportunity zone funds]. The reason that we haven’t been so aggressive is that the final guidance from Treasury hasn’t even come out yet.”

Real estate has proved the most common investment method so far, but it doesn’t mean all projects will be attractive to investors.

“The biggest constraint right now is that so many of these funds are looking for $20-million-plus projects,” says Kelly Bianucci, who has a background in private equity and is consulting the state on investor engagement and education. “There are a lot of smaller opportunities that no one is really aggregating for these larger funds.”

Consequently, Colorado is currently building a website, expected to go live by the end of the year, to facilitate connections between investors with potential projects in opportunity zones across the state.

To date, there are nearly 9,000 zones, representing nearly 35 million people in all 50 states, Washington D.C. and five U.S. territories. Colorado alone has 126, whittled down to 25 percent of the 1,249 census tracts in the state that qualified. According to federal guidelines, opportunity zones were determined by census tracts, which had to meet median income and poverty rate criteria. In the end, the average poverty rate in opportunity zones nationwide is 32 percent, while the median family income is 37 percent below other tracts in the area, with an unemployment rate 1.6 times higher than the national average.

In Colorado, OEDIT asked local governments, economic development partners and the public for feedback on eligible tracts, including previous development hurdles and the ability to market the potential to investors, with a roughly two-week turnaround in order to make the federal deadline. (The state announced its nominations on March 23 and the Department of Treasury confirmed them on April 11.)

OEDIT also considered a series of data points, in addition to family median income and poverty level requirements, including unemployment rates, employ-

ment growth and geographic isolation when deciding which census tracts to nominate.

While state officials deliberately nominated more census tracts in rural areas of the state (60 percent), they also designated plenty of census tracts in more populated, high-growth cities along the Front Range, including Colorado Springs, Denver, Boulder and Fort Collins.

“One thing you could do is just take the neediest tracts in the state and that might drive you to small rural tracts that don’t have any investable assets, and we didn’t want to do that because then nothing would happen,” Kraft says. “And at the same time we didn’t just pick a bunch of tracts that met the criteria for opportunity zones but were, say, in the path of development that was already happening so that you might just accelerate displacement.”

In the face of competition with coastal cities in New York, California and Washington D.C., it was a conscious effort to draw capital from national investors and opportunity zone funds, Kraft explains.

“The big funds are probably not going to want to place their investments in lower-population, lowerdensity areas,” he says. “Boulder and Denver have a chance at attracting that capital, whereas a smaller, really far-flung rural area might not.”

In the end, Gov. Hickenlooper nominated four census tracts in Boulder County, two in Longmont, one in Lafayette and one in the City of Boulder. The Longmont and Lafayette zones are already part of the statewide Enterprise Zone incentive, which provides 10 different income tax credits to businesses located or expanding into the zone for things like employeesponsored healthcare, job skill training and capital investments. And both cities had already undergone significant planning processes with community support to help direct development in the areas, which made going after the opportunity zone designation a logical next step.

“We already had all the documentation in place to submit to the state,” says Roger Caruso, economic development director for the City of Lafayette, who says the opportunity zone designation, which was mentioned at a Lafayette City Council meeting in early March, has broad support from City officials.

The census tract includes a lot of vacant land with the potential for commercial and industrial development, Caruso says.

See OPPORTUNITY ZONES Page 12

December 6, 2018 11

OPPORTUNITY ZONES from Page 11

In Longmont, the two adjacent census tracts straddle the southern part of Main Street, butting up against the St. Vrain Creek to the south and Ninth Avenue to the north. The western tract extends out to Hover Road, the eastern tract encompasses the abandoned sugar mill just south of Third Avenue.

“We looked at where we had opportunity and where we already had plans in place,” says Jessica Erickson, president of the Longmont Economic Development Partnership (LEDP), plans like the Envision Longmont Comprehensive Plan, Longmont Downtown Development Authority master plan and the First and Main streets transit plan.

“We’re going to be able to show potential investors that there is already public support from City Council and City staff for the plans that are put in place so that they won’t have to be concerned about if there is going to be resistance on the public side to make these investments in the opportunity zone.”

Erickson also says the City and its economic development partners were intentional about choosing census tracts that might not otherwise draw significant investment, even in a place that has seen significant growth in recent years.

“I don’t think it is clear that private capital will come because there are some risks,” Erickson says.

Although a lot of work has been done through the Resilient St. Vrain flood recovery efforts, development along the river corridor has proved slow because of flood plain issues. And the sugar mill site will require additional capital to mitigate environmental issues and aging structures. Plus, the site is technically still a part of unincorporated Boulder County and any redevelopment of the site requires annexation.

Following the opportunity zone designation announcement in the spring, Longmont City Council met with an expert from the Brookings Institute to discuss the potential of having an opportunity zone, and Erickson says she hopes to have a communityinformed investment prospectus with input from all stakeholders by the end of the year. And the City is set to finalize a housing plan in the next few weeks to ensure its in place before development in the zone begins.

“We were told early on that if you don’t already have housing policy in place you’re going to want to do that because one of the fears of the program is leveraging that tool to overly gentrify an area because of the value of it,” Erickson says.

Additionally, LEDP has been in touch with both current owners and potential investors within the zone to ensure they are educated about the program. Caruso too has been in touch with a variety of developers 12 December 6, 2018

interested in the Lafayette zone, with projects ranging from senior affordable housing to multiple flex industrial-commercial spaces.

“We’re kind of in a holding pattern until we get the rules and regulations,” Caruso says.

Developers, “are just following up to get into a position so that they have eyes on what they want to do when the information is released and then they’ll know how to proceed.”

In the City of Boulder, the designated census tract encompasses 2.5 square miles stretching east of 28th Street to 55th Street and north of Arapahoe to Diagonal Highway. According to U.S. Census data, the median household income for the area is $50,885, compared to $60,569 for the City of Boulder and $55,322 nationally.

“I think people look at the overall average income for Boulder and they figure all of Boulder is very prosperous, but that’s not really the case,” says Jennifer Pinsonneault, business liaison with the City’s Economic Vitality department, who submitted Boulder’s feedback to the state. “Once you start to drill down and look at census tracts or small areas, you find that there are areas where folks have not really benefited from the turnaround in the economy. We felt that there was certainly need here.”

According to emails released by the City, there was some hesitancy at first from both City staff and the Chamber of Commerce to pursue designation for an opportunity zone. After talking with state officials, however, Pinsonneault wrote, “Since OEDIT specifically mentions the possibility of using the program to address needs for workforce housing and infrastructure, it may be worth a closer look to determine whether the program could be useful in addressing housing affordability and workforce transportation issues or enhancing diversity and social equity efforts.”

By the beginning of March, City staff decided to pursue the designation for the census tract including Diagonal Plaza with only days to spare before the state deadline. Pinsonneault consulted with the Chamber of Commerce and City staff, but City Council was not

involved in these conversations, and the issue has yet to be discussed at a public meeting. Staff did, however, alert the City Council in a Head’s Up memo at the end of March, after the state announced its nominations, which included Boulder. The quick process and consultation with the Chamber but not elected officials has caused some concern among certain Council members and community members worried about transparency, along with the designation in general.

“Really we are the elected,” says Council member Cindy Carlisle. “If people like us or not, or like what we’re doing, we were elected to set the policy, not to Despite the need for have staff doing policy redevelopment at Boulder’s Diagonal work and then telling us Plaza, opportunity zone what’s going on.” critics are concerned the federal program The emails also show with only exacerbate that the aging Diagonal affordability and equity issues in the city.

Plaza is the primary reason City staff chose to support the census tract that was eventually designated, knowing City officials had long talked about redevelopment of the area. At City Council’s urging, the City conducted redevelopment studies for the Diagonal Plaza shopping center back in 2011, concluding that due to the large number of property owners and cost, redevelopment of the site over the next decade was unlikely unless the City actively participated in alleviating some of the “logistical and financial obstacles.”

However, there doesn’t seem to have been much emphasis on the area since then, and the City’s webpage dedicated to the area hasn’t been updated since 2013. Since then, several storefronts have closed or moved elsewhere, even after the original developer and property owner sold the complex in 2015 for $4.05 million to an LLC with several investors, presumably to redevelop the property.

“If this might break free some interest in working on enhancements on Diagonal Plaza, that might be a good outcome for the community,” says Clif Harald, executive director of the Boulder Economic Council which is part of the Chamber of Commerce, and who consulted Pinsonneault on Boulder’s feedback to the state. “This has been an ongoing conversation within the City and with lots of different interests. That’s our interest, is being supportive of that conversation that has been going on for years.”

The census tract is much larger than the Diagonal Plaza, however, encompassing other areas that are either recently redeveloped or in the process, like Boulder Junction and Boulder Community Health Foothills Hospital.

While the City is using the Boulder Valley Boulder Weekly

Comprehensive Plan for guidance, Pinsonneault says, staff is still in the process of internally evaluating the opportunity zone program and what role local government can and should have in it, without citing specific projects the City has in mind.

“My understanding is that there are a lot of communities that have opportunity zones but aren’t quite sure what they have, and they are still in the process of analysis like we are,” Pinsonneault says. “And there are others that have definite projects in mind, and Longmont is one of them.”

The emails further indicate there is already some investment interest in the area, specifically mentioning plans for an assisted living development with affordable and mid-level pricing as a way of bringing “more inclusionary housing into Boulder.” Pinsonneault says since then she’s spoken to potential investors, but not many. Furthermore, she doesn’t have much information to give them. “A handful of developers have reached out but we don’t have much to tell them yet. It’s still the early days,” she says, emphasizing that they are still awaiting the final regulations from the Treasury Department and the IRS. Council member Carlisle has been asking for more information regarding opportunity zones from City staff since early fall, she says, after she attended a Sept. 19 informational meeting hosted

by Vitale that she was informed of by a concerned citizen. Pinsonneault was also there, as were a variety of investors and representatives from OEDIT. State consultant Bianucci, who was also at the Sept. 19 meeting, says there were a lot of different ideas flying around about how “investments could be channeled” into Boulder’s opportunity zone. But the meeting also showed the state just how “important it is for each local community to be proactive in attracting the kind of investment they want, the kind of projects they want.”

Kraft from OEDIT agrees. To that end, the state is also offering grants, as well as technical assistance, to local governments through the Department of Local Affairs.

“From a state perspective, we do think local communities should tell a story about what they need and what they want,” Kraft says. “And even put other local incentives together to make sure they are getting what they want and there aren’t investments that displace low-income communities. It’s really up to every local area to figure out how to do that best.”

“That’s what we really took away from the Boulder community,” Bianucci continues. “Otherwise, there’s just too Boulder Weekly

much of a risk that all this money is coming into opportunity zones without regard for what the communities need or want.”

There are other significant risks to the program as well, not least of which is the loss of tax revenue for the federal government. Deferring capital gains taxes could cost $9.4 billion over the first five years, according to the most recent estimates released by the Joint Committee on Taxation, although that will significantly drop after a decade.

The program could also prove risky for investors, even if they stand to benefit most.

“I think in this hurried environment as an investor you have to be extremely on your toes and really stick to whatever due diligence protocols you have and maybe even put a little turbo on that.

It’s an environment that’s very tempting for potentially unscrupulous managers,” Bachmann, the investment advisor, says.

“Whenever there’s urgency and tremendous demand you get into the situation where the people demanding it are the ones on the short end of the stick and that’s the investors.”

The quick timeline could also easily drive demand, and therefore property values up, shrinking the investors’ internal rate of return in the end, Bachmann says. Plus, there’s always a chance that the tax rate will be different at a later date, potentially shrinking any savings from the tax deferment. And like all investments, returns are not a given, Vitale warns.

“Everyone needs to remember, they could also lose everything,” he says.

“There’s no guarantee that any of these investments in any of these places is going to work. People seem to be forgetting this simple fact.”

The program is marred by skepticism from economists, as well. There are concerns over the significant lack of reporting requirements in the regulations to measure the impact of opportunity fund investments, especially since earlier, similar tax incentive programs, like the ’90s Empowerment Zones, have proved difficult to evaluate, even with more stringent approval conditions.

Although the state is encouraging municipalities to participate in development in the zones, there is nothing that says investors have to disclose they are using opportunity zone funds for either real estate or business development.

“There will probably be many, many projects that will go under the radar that no one will know about except the investors,” Kraft admits. “And local governments might not even know if they were opportunity funds or not.”

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Still, the unknown is potentially one of the largest risks of achieving opportunity zone designations, as are the unintended consequences.

“This is something that we’ve never seen before, so we don’t know what all the risks are, which is not a comfortable space, especially for the public sector which is responsible for managing the City,” Erickson, from Longmont, says.

Further gentrification, driving up property taxes and pricing existing residents and businesses out of the area are also potential repercussions from the program.

“My concern as a U.S. taxpayer is that if we’re going to go to this level of non-progressiveness in the tax code, I want to be really sure that some social benefits are going to occur,” says Hal Halstein, a local investment advisor.

“Everybody who has called me about it, no one has focused in on the social benefits.”

With approximately 60,000 incommuters each day, Boulder is already seen as unaffordable for many residents and non-residents alike. Rent prices are increasing exponentially each year and both commercial and residential property taxes have skyrocketed recently.

Many fear the opportunity zone is only going to magnify these issues.

“This is going to lead to just a whole bunch more job development in Boulder or market-rate housing, neither of which we need,” Halstein says.

“There’s no upside to this. Boulder doesn’t need it. You’re going to get investments you don’t want.”

Attracting national investment to opportunity zones might therefore be a tradeoff for other community values like economic equity and diversity.

When discussing whether or not to pursue designation, one Vitality Department official wrote in an email, “It is true that private investment could increase property values and property taxes on other properties, exacerbating a current high property tax situation. Is that a reason not to seek additional private investment? I don’t think so.”

Others in the community disagree, however, questioning Boulder’s pursuit of the designation when so much hangs in the balance. “To me it’s a matter of social justice,” says Jeff Flynn, a Boulderarea lawyer and fierce critic of the opportunity zone designation. “Boulder needs to help those who are in the middle- and lower-income levels come to and remain in Boulder, not pursue policies that benefit the wealthiest investors who will invest in these opportunity zones.”

Several Boulder Council members have also publicly expressed skepticism about the program as a whole. “It seems to be that we can’t just have this rah-rah booster mentality about it because there’s too much at stake,” Carlisle says. “And what’s at stake is the livability of the community for regular people.”

Other Council members disagree, arguing that the designation could help the City meet some of its affordability goals by attracting specific investors.

“While I understand questioning the motivations of the Trump Administration and the effectiveness of the broader policy decision (which is what many of the articles that have been shared with Council focus on), the reality is: Opportunity Zones exist and they have potential to serve our community goal of building more affordable housing,” Council member Jill Grano wrote in a Nov. 29 email to Council on the citywide hotline.

There’s no doubt the conversation will continue in coming months as Council is scheduled to have its first public discussion of the opportunity zone designation at its Dec. 18 meeting.

“I think it’s clear that Diagonal could be redeveloped and that there’s challenges with redeveloping it given that there are several different property owners,” says Council member Lisa Morzel.

“What do people want to see there, do we want more retail, do we need housing, what is it? And that should not be a discussion by a select few but it should be a broad community discussion. I certainly hope that’s the next step.”

One thing is for certain: Boulder County opportunity zones are here to stay, as the federal designations are set for the duration of the program and only an act of Congress could change that.

And with maximum benefit to investors in the next year, the City of Boulder needs to figure out its priorities quickly if it hopes to have a hand in shaping the outcome of redevelopment at the Diagonal Plaza, or anywhere else in the census tract.

“It just seems to me that we should put the horse before the cart on this one, and not back into the kinds of contentious situations the City tends to find itself in,” says Sarah Silver, a neighborhood advocate. “As long as this opportunity zone exists, I would like to see the City get ahead of it and figure out how it can support projects that meet actual needs for the city, versus projects that meet the needs for the very big-pocketed investors that are going to benefit from the entire federal opportunity zone program.”

Boulder Weekly

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think better things are going to come,” Victor says this week, after finding out the crowdsourcing page raising funds to get him health insurance, and therefore the heart transplant he so desperately needs, has exceeded its goal. “I now have more options.”

Boulder Weekly spoke with Victor and his wife, Estella, for the Nov. 29 cover story “Victor’s heart,” which chronicled the challenges their family faces to get Victor the medical care he needs given his immigration status and lack of health insurance. Since the story ran, the Boulder County community has contributed more than $10,500 to Victor’s Joel Dyer GoFundMe page.

“When we first opened the GoFundMe we didn’t think anyone was going to support it,” Victor says. “I’m so thankful for everything that’s been helping me, and thanks to God, everything will work out.”

From Guatemala, Victor has lived in Longmont since 1999, when he was 17. He was diagnosed with severe cardiomyopathy and congestive heart failure, which consequently leads to a long list of other health issues, in 2005. Shortly after, he married Estella, whom Victor (now 36) knew in Guatemala, and the couple has two young daughters, Ailin, 10, and Yaretzi, 5. In recent years, his condition has worsened, leaving him unable to work and the family unable to afford private health insurance on Estella’s salary from working multiple fastfood jobs.

Doctors have told Victor and Estella that a heart transplant is his only real chance at survival, but without the ability to access public benefits or the funds for private insurance, he hasn’t been able to get on the transplant list. Hopefully, that’s all going to change. Victor and Estella have a meeting this week with a health insurance broker, and if he can apply by Dec. 15, with the ability to pay the first installment, he’ll be able to use it starting Jan. 1. He hopes to use the insurance first to get on the transplant list, then for an electrical shock that will stabilize the abnormal beating of his heart for three months, followed by getting a heart pump installed, which will buy him a few years while he waits for a new heart. The money couldn’t have come fast enough, Victor says, pausing to catch his breath.

“I’m really agitated and with even the littlest walks I’m out of breath, and I need an electric shock because with that I’ll feel a little better,” Victor says.

“Although Victor would never show you that he is in pain or feels that his heart is beating abnormally, he said he didn’t sleep for two nights last week,” says Nick Robles, a former neighbor who organized the fundraiser. Robles intends to keep the fundraiser open to help cover Victor’s out-of-pocket and deductible costs, and he’s updating the site with more information about Victor’s condition as it comes in.

“I received help for a medical condition from my community (Lyons, CO) in the ’80’s before GoFundMe existed. It was such a blessing. Let’s do this!!” Lillian Chatham wrote on the site just after Thanksgiving.

Community members flocked to the site in recent weeks, contributing amounts from $15-$1,000, and leaving messages of support, as well as calls to action.

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Boulder Weekly

John Haefeli

BUYING LOCAL

Based in San Luis Valley, Haefeli Honey, like many small beekeeping operations, has done its best to alleviate a problem over which it has little control.

The ins and outs of a Colorado family honeyproducing operation

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by Emma Walker

S

outhern Colorado’s San Luis Valley is as rugged as it gets. It’s bordered by the Sangre de Cristo and the San Juan mountains; anywhere that’s not covered in peaks or sand is used for agriculture.

It’s a far cry from Rising Sun, Indiana, where Laura Haefeli grew up. Her family’s farmhouse on the Ohio River peeked across the Kentucky border through lush trees, which are in short supply in Del Norte, Colorado, her home of 22 years.

Like the little hamlet at the western edge of the San Luis Valley, though, Rising Sun was a small agricultural town. This suits Haefeli, who married into a family with beekeeping in its blood.

Laura’s husband, Tom, is a native of Monte Vista, Colorado, where his family has kept bees for generations. Although he left the San Luis Valley for college and worked as a pilot for a number of years, eventually — as Tom tired of making the commute to Denver and Laura became busier with three children and a robust running career — in the early 2000s, the couple realized it was time for a change.

“It just wasn’t sustainable,” Laura says of the time her family spent apart during those years.

So the Haefelis did what Haefelis had done since Tom’s great-grandfather emigrated from Switzerland in 1919: they turned their attention to the bees. Their oldest son, John, now sells beeswax beauty products from Haefeli bees whose hives are scattered around the valley, and they opened a storefront in Del Norte, where they continue to sell honey from their hives, just as Great Grandma did in the mid-20th century.

A lot has changed in the intervening century, but the Haefelis still bring their bees down to

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Grandpa’s property in the milder climate of Presidio, Texas, where they stay into the new year. At the end of January, the crew packs up the hives and ships them to California’s San Joaqin Valley, where they have a pollination contract with an almond grower.

“Farming practices today are monoculturally centered,” Tom explains. “We grow vast amounts of the same crop in a very concentrated area, and almond trees are no different. So you have 80 percent of the world’s almonds growing in a six-week period in California, and the rest are in Spain.”

It’s why beekeepers must ship their bees to specific areas across the country and why almonds and almond products are so expensive, especially as the honeybee populations that pollinate them increasingly fall victim to colony collapse disorder (CCD).

“We’re losing 30 to 40 percent of our colonies a year,” Tom says, adding that a decade ago, it was closer to 10 percent. CCD, in which adult bees inexplicably leave their colonies, has begun to abate somewhat, but the huge array of chemicals (particularly fungicides) in the environment kill the microbiota in bees’ stomachs, preventing them from digesting nutrients.

The monocultural practices Tom mentions, too, are part of the problem. He compares it to living on a single food source for an entire month. You can survive on nothing but steak for 30 days, sure — “but it’s not good for you.”

Haefeli Honey, like many small beekeeping operations, has done its best to alleviate a problem over which it has little control. The Haefeli hives now occupy only about half the space they used to; Tom has moved the bees to the fringes of the San Luis Valley, farther from heavy indus-

trial farming. Some of his beekeeping peers are planting vast swaths of wildflowers, which vary the bees’ diet somewhat.

“Unfortunately, the big corporate farms” — which might have 80,000 colonies, compared to the Haefelis’ 1,200 — “aren’t doing that,” Tom says. Happier bees make happier honey, he adds.

But simply knowing the bees are well cared for is only part of the reason to buy honey from a local producer. According to the National Honey Board, products must list additional ingredients, but it’s murky what constitutes an “incidental additive.”

Corn syrup or cane sugar can make up as much as 49 percent of a product marketed as honey. Plus, the Haefelis say, many manufacturers import tons of cheap honey from China; it’s mixed with commercially produced American honey for a final product that, according to Tom, is “vastly inferior” to what a small-scale manufacturer produces.

All this gives Tom pause when he’s asked about the future of his beekeeping operation. The potential for their oldest son, John, to take over the family business is certainly there — it simply comes down to “whether we want to continue,” he says. As a beekeeper and honey packer, Haefeli Honey bears the combined weight of agricultural regulations, the state health department, the USDA’s Farm Service Agency and the EPA. But, “we’re in a unique position,” Laura says.

The loss of bees worldwide has brought a great deal of attention to beekeeping, and sustainable shoppers want sustainably sourced honey more than ever.

The best way to keep Colorado beekeeping operations — and the towns they help sustain — from drying up? Tom says: “Buy local.”

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Boulder Weekly

Biking Vail Pass When you’re not a semi-pro athlete like everyone else in Colorado, what do you do?

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ADVENTURE

All photos courtesy of Annie Murlowski

“Here’s my idea of a great mountain day: Drive up for a long weekend in the Vail or Breckenridge area, check into a cabin and sit on the porch with a microbrew in hand and the fresh mountain air out my window.”

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picked up as something other than a keychain. Despite our close proximity to the outdoors, I’ve always found myself a bit more at home in front of a fire with a book than rappelling down a rock face.

It’s not that I don’t want to spend my time seeking adventure between the Maroon Bells’ aspens and the Indian Peaks’ spruce. Honestly, I’m simply a textbook over-committer. When I decided I wanted to snowboard, I purchased an entire set of gear and used it approximately four times before the assortment found a nice warm home in my garage. I do enjoy hiking and have an entire bookshelf dedicated to the day hikes of Colorado, but honestly I haven’t actually gone hiking in over a year. Things get busy,

the roads are packed, and getting up at 6 a.m. to beat the crowds is just not my forte.

Here’s my idea of a great mountain day: Drive up for a long weekend in the Vail or Breckenridge area, check into a cabin and sit with a microbrew in hand and the fresh mountain air out my window. Nothing’s better than the sweet forest smell wafting from the trees, especially when enjoyed from a porch while wrapped in a blanket.

The thing is, building a habit of adventuring is hard, but I’m realizing there are plenty of ways to enjoy everyday adventures without checking off an entire list of 14ers.

I’ve been slowly putting my toe in the water toward adventuring over the last few months, researching hiking trails near me and trying out more outdoor activities on vacations. My last big trip I went surfing in Maui and felt so free and alive that I knew I needed to bring that adventurous spirit back home with me.

On a recent trip to Vail, I discovered that Charter Sports has a guided bike tour that drops you off at the top of Vail Pass and allows you to coast the 17 miles and 3,000-foot descent back toward Lionshead Village, the far west side of Vail town square. I’ve always been interested in biking in the mountains, but if snowboarding was any indication, I knew I couldn’t buy a whole kit just for it to sit in the garage. Booking bikes for the day with the promise of an easy ride ahead sounded like the perfect opportunity to try things out, and traveling with a guide gave me a safety net that ensured there was no chance of getting lost on the journey. With only the power of my legs to pursue the trail, I’d have help, but still be responsible for making it back to town on my own. Once out in the mountains, calling for a Lyft wasn’t going to be an option.

We started off in the shop where Tom, my guide for the day, helped fit me with a proper helmet and an appropriately sized bike. Within minutes we were in a van and on the road up the pass, ears popping every few minutes. As Tom pointed out some of the see VAIL PASS Page 20

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guideposts we’d be watching for as we made our way back toward Vail, I was tired still from the drive up from the metro area the day before and wishing I was spending my Sunday morning snuggled into blankets instead of wondering how painful biking down a mountain was going to be. The farther we got from town, I felt confident that if I somehow lost Tom, at least the brown totem poles marked with trail names would create an easy breadcrumb-like path all the way back to my afternoon nap.

Vail Pass begins at an elevation of 10,662 feet, making sunscreen and water a necessity on a hot day.

The warm 70 degrees in town hardchanged to a brisk 50 at the summit. At the Black Lakes Picnic Site, just off I-70, we jumped out of the van and listened to a brief tutorial on biking safety. When biking it’s important to stay single-file, so that there’s plenty of room for faster bikers to pass along the narrow pathways. Stopping for a scenic view means you and your bike should move off the roadway, and make sure to hydrate while at a higher altitude.

The last time I actually rode a bicycle was to and from campus in Fort Collins nearly a decade ago, so getting acclimated to the gears took time.

Before starting off, Tom reminded me how the gears function and made sure I was set up to easily transition without getting stuck on any uphill climbs. The logic to shifting is backwards to what you might initially expect. To go up a hill with momentum you shift down, and to pick up speed in a descent you shift up. The well-paved uphill path alongside the Black Lakes was the perfect space for relearning how to balance appropriately while testing out which gears took the burn off my calves. Then downhill, shifting into a higher gear made my legs work, so that each pedal forward was propelling the bike faster rather than just coasting along with the help of gravity.

Past the lakes, a brief segment of the trail took us alongside I-70. There’s plenty of shoulder in between bikers and the speeding cars, but the wind that whips off the highway forced me to pump my legs harder and maintain enough core strength for balance. Just a few minutes into the ride we popped under a bridge and the mountains filled the horizon. We had entered a new world, where time was irrelevant.

Without cell service, no buzzing alerts were there to distract me from the journey ahead, and I felt like I could spend the entire day looping around the mountains. The crisp air and the

Author Annie Murlowski purposefully steps out of her comfort zone to get a taste of “Colorado adventure.”

wind in my face woke up my senses to the world around us. Just as my mind felt fully awake, a deer appeared on the side of the path, watching us as we slowed down to avoid frightening it. If I could have reached out without spooking it, my fingers would have brushed across its fur. This is what adventure is all about.

The paved trail followed the path of what used to be U.S. 6, before I-70 was carved through the mountain. The original path through the Gore Range was cut by Charlie Vail, a highway engineer who had no idea that the town would eventually bear his name. After we broke through the trees, we rested at a small stream before turning onto the speed portion of the trail. Breathing in the thin air and enjoying cool water gave a fresh perspective on what it would have been like to traverse through the rugged landscape before the ease of modern transportation.

It’s easy to take for granted all the beauty of the mountains that is just a quick drive away. Today I can enjoy a path cut hundreds of years ago with nothing but a helmet and a bottle of water. Whether on the trail or in my personal journey at home, it’s a reminder that no matter how hard the road is ahead, there are trailblazers who have forged a much more difficult path before me. I am forever grateful for the experiences I get to have.

After the stream, the trail opened up to panoramic views of the town of Vail to the west. I-70 is far off to the left and the rugged terrain of the mountains is a natural barrier to the right.

The well-maintained trail ahead declined at 8 percent, promising to make the ride back into town a brisk one. The descent made my heart race as I picked up speed heading faster and faster toward civilization. I almost wantBoulder Weekly

ed to slow time down so I could enjoy the simplicity of the mountains without the pulls of technology and noise of the city. But it was too late. Life happens so quickly, and there is no fighting gravity.

A few riders passed going the opposite direction, but Tom assured me that after a few runs, the climb uphill isn’t nearly as daunting as it sounds. Decades-old cyclist names emblazon the trail, guiding the uphill path, acknowledging racers from the Coors Classic who braved Colorado’s mountain landscapes in the ’80s.

Originally a three-day race, the Coors Classic has grown to a two-week-long journey, spread across the country. The historic names, so easy to pass over, changed the face of cycling and paved the way for contemporary variations of the sport.

Tom pointed out another notable point of interest across the valley. The intimidating rock face above the trees is a favorite of ice climbers during the winter months. The direct vertical descent leaves climbers hanging, literally, off the edge of the earth. I think I’ll stick to biking as my adventure for now.

Another bridge takes us under I-70, and the trail starts to feel more like a town path, crisscrossing through neighborhoods full of unique architecture and landscaping. The path continues, winding past the Betty Ford Alpine Garden and then the Gerald R. Ford Amphitheater. These landmarks would be easy to miss if I was racing back into town, but a leisurely pace allowed for a brisk walk through the internationally acclaimed gardens.

When starting out on an adventure, there’s no reason to take a fast pace.

Life is best enjoyed as a marathon, and taking that approach to experiencing the mountains gave me time to enjoy the beauty of the gardens and learn about what the Fords brought to the area.

Past the gardens, the ride began to change, each pedal forward making my calves burn, reminding me that biking Boulder Weekly

in the mountains on level or uphill ground is a lot more work than coasting on a descent.

The cost of the easy downhill portion is the challenging final mile back toward Lionshead Village.

Once in Vail again, we hopped off to amble through the busy weekend foot traffic, people-watching as the farmers market overtook most of the town streets. The real world came rushing back with cell phones ringing, music playing and the buzz of technology palpable in the air. The atmosphere felt almost too fastpaced, too vibrant. Through the bulk of traffic, easy-to-navigate city streets led us back toward our initial departure point, bringing the morning to an end. I get it now, that no matter how busy the world feels, an escape into nature is just a few minutes away.

The ride wasn’t difficult, but there were parts of the trail that were challenging, forcing me to test my acclimation to a higher altitude and imploring my muscles to work harder to journey up the steep hills. Just like in life, sometimes the best rewards are at the top of the hill. From my vantage point at the top of the pass, I was able to understand what it means to have the freedom to enjoy the outdoors, to come face-to-face with wildlife and to gain a fresh perspective on the pace of life around me. Despite my uneasiness of the initial journey, it was worth it, and I learned that not only am I capable of biking, I really enjoyed it.

I’m not ready yet to tackle Capitol Peak, but I can sense now what it means to appreciate and enjoy the outdoors. There are outdoor adventures for any skill level, and with time and practice, I’ll be confident enough that I can head out on the road with only the mountain air to guide me. In the meantime, I’ll head into the garage, dust off that snowboard set and head out on the mountain this winter, ready to tackle a new adventure, even if I stay on the green trails.

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buzz

Johnny Woods

At left, a diorama of ducks at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science (DMNS). Below (color photo): Now extinct passenger pigeons in a diorama depicting Johnston County, Iowa; A black and white photo from 1973-74 of Bill Berry painting the background for the Moose-Caribou Diorama in North American Mammal Hall at DMNS.

Above and below, courtesy of the Denver Museum of Nature and Science

Dioramas: the theater of science and discovery by Sarah Haas

I

t’s a busy Saturday afternoon at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science but there are no lines for any of the exhibits. Free to go wherever one pleases, wandering the museum’s dimly lit halls takes on a quality of discovery, every visitor creating their own experience which, since its inception in 1900, has been the Museum’s singular intention.

Whether at one of the newer exhibits, taking a virtual reality trip through outer space, or in one of the the oldest, a 1919 diorama of the now extinct passenger pigeon, each visitor is offered the opportunity not just to visit an impossible place, but to experience it.

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Even though modern museum-goers increasingly demand high-tech experiences (the entrance to the virtual reality exhibit is framed with the words, “we heard you,” as if to say the exhibit exists only because it’s what the people wanted), the seed of each exhibit still lies in the original innovation of the diorama.

The word “diorama,” which comes from the Greek for “to see through,” was first used in the modern sense by French artist Louis Daguerre who, in the 1820s, devised a box that could illuminate theatrical backgrounds from behind, changing the nature of the scene. Eventually, these scenes evolved to include 3D

objects and, by the 1880s, the trick was picked up by natural history museums across the world as a way to display their collections. The original idea was that, in borrowing theatrical hacks, the museums would likewise be able to suspend the viewer’s disbelief long enough to entertain the concepts at play in each and every diorama. From there, museums hoped the viewer would come to care about nature and so become its steward.

But, more than 100 years later, as reported by Menachem Wecker for Smithsonian.com in 2016, museums across the country are wrestling with the see DIORAMAS Page 24

December 6 , 2018 23

DIORAMAS from Page 23

dilemma of what to do with dioramas chance encounter between these two in the 21st century, when the art form species. René O’Connell, an archivist seems antiquated at best. Some, like the for the Denver Museum of Nature and National Museum of Natural History Science, says that in real life, it’s rare in Washington D.C., have decided to that the two should meet. Nonetheless, downsize or scrap their collections alto- it’s possible, and so, when the scene was gether. But at the Denver Museum of being sculpted in the early 1970s, its Nature and Science, where the tactile creators leveraged it as a moment of displays still have three floors of real subtle but high drama that would invite estate, director of zoology John the audience’s attention.

Demboski says their eradication is not The result is uncanny. The caribou, an option. In part, this is Johnny Woods because the dioramas are, in themselves, historical art objects. But just as importantly they are still, even a century later, just as effective as scientific and educational tools as they ever were.

Demboski explains that hidden deep in the innards of the museum and well out of the public eye, 4.5 million specimens and artifacts are kept as “vouchers” for the items on display on the floor. These items have been collected since the 1870s, a swelling archive of Mother Nature herself, preserved and studied in the name of scientific understanding.

Arguably, this is why the museum exists, so that life can be kept, recorded and better understood, but the museum’s goal is decidedly more public facing, its mission “to ignite the appearing to be in the middle of steps community’s passion for nature and scithat never land, don’t just look alive but ence.” It is the museum’s belief that the as if they are in motion. The moose dioramas were, and continue to be, the seem to be making the decision to let best way to present the archives to the them pass without a fuss. The young people so as to truly excite and engage couple watches on for awhile as if to the public. wait and see if the scene will reach its One need only see the interaction conclusion, but it won’t. And so, evenbetween people and the dioramas to tually, the spectators will move on from recognize their effect, and on this parthis little instance of theater, frozen in ticular Saturday afternoon, when the time, and the boyfriend will whisper to Wildlife Halls are bustling with hunthe girlfriend, “It’s hard to believe it’s dreds of people standing silhouetted not real.” against more than 90 lit displays, such This, the veracity of the diorama, is engagements are plentiful. Take for forever a matter of debate, one that, like instance a young couple holding hands the caribou’s footsteps, will never fall on in front of the Alaskan tundra, found the side of right or wrong, but always deep inside of one of the museum’s hover somewhere in the middle. In maze-like halls. some ways, these exhibits are as real as It would appear to be fall, the it gets: The animals were hunted (or in mountain background painted in oximuseum speak “collected”) by museum dized reds and aspen-leaf yellows. In staff of yesteryear, old-school natural the foreground, thousands of individually painted leaves echo the alpine hues. historians whose job it was to trek into the wilderness and document its exact To the couple’s left stands a herd of conditions. caribou caught in the midst of their These scientists, collecting specitrek down to lower elevations, where mens and detailing conditions, were they will live out the harsh winter. To the right are two behemoth moose trav- also swashbuckling adventurers, living for months in the field so they could eling higher up as they are wont to do kill the very real animals now standing in the coldest months. immemorial behind walls of glass. With The tundra diorama contains a 24 December 6 , 2018

blood and sweat on their hands, they knew the death of each specimen was crucial for the art of bringing nature back to life. Because they were also rugged artists, sculptors taking plaster molds of burrows and plein-air painters sketching a place in detail so it could later be exacted from thousands of miles away.

Once back home in their museum labs and studios, the explorers would

These days, it’s a matter of personal taste which one prefers, but both can be said to achieve the same sensation of being in a certain place at a precise moment in time, at least almost. For while the scene is meant to feel real, it is, as the boyfriend reminds us, not. It is an illusion, one designed to be seen by the viewer who holds a predetermined perspective.

There is another way to see each diorama, though. Most of them are equipped with a seemingly ordinary door that acts like a portal to another world, for as soon as you turn the corner the illusion goes kaput. Just out of the viewer’s line of sight, the background mural abruptly stops and the foreground, which appeared a rugged mountain pass, is actually just scaffolding covered with plaster and a thin layer of dust. Some of the caribou aren’t even all the way on the platform, but hover, somehow, in the middle. In all ways, the diorama is a fabrication and its effectiveness depends on its ability to hide parts of itself from the viewer so that they might forget the line between the real and the fake altogether, losing themselves in the scene instead.

But in this modern time, when museums say “we heard take to deconstructing the you” and design a virtual realispecimens they’d collected, A diorama of wolves in the ty exhibit instead of a new taking apart animals and Alaskan tundra. diorama, it seems audiences plants so their pieces could are clamoring not for suspenbe replicated in paper and sion of disbelief but for total wax and fiberglass before being put back together. It would take immersion in the spectacle instead. And years for them to do this painstaking while one solution might be to give the work. It is in light of this scrupulous people what they think they want, attention to detail that their work earns another might be to insist on the tangiits gravity because the goal was not bly real, to face the diorama’s intended merely mimicry of the natural world, illusion head on, and to dispel it. but the replication of the feeling of Of course, this would come with a being there. risk — breaking the rules always does At different points in time, the — but as society creeps toward a culdiorama artists used different techtural merger of the real and the fake, niques to transport viewers. According perhaps we can reclaim some magic by to O’Connell, up until the 1950s the admitting how our tricks are perbackground artists were decidedly formed. atmospheric in their approach, creating For example, when viewing the illusions of depth through faded colors Cheetah in the African Hall and gawkand blurred details in their murals. The ing at the way his feet stir up permaartists knew that the viewer’s mind nent clouds of dust, does it ruin the would take the detailed foreground illusion to know that it’s nothing but an and subconsciously supplant its sugeffect achieved by thin sheets of acegestions upon the scene at large. But tone, scuffed with brown paint? Or, are by the 1970s there were new artists on we inspired by knowing that the impastaff using new techniques of realism, las he is chasing are standing on a maze painting sharp images on the backof rebar armaments, running from one ground that left little work to the through the other, as can be seen if one imagination. crouches down to the floor? Do either Boulder Weekly

of these facts make the question posed by the placards, “Will the Cheetah catch the Impala?” any less evocative?

And while the Denver Museum of Nature and Science makes a statement by keeping its dioramas, it’s worth noting that long ago the museum let go of its diorama staff, save for the custodial crew tasked with cleaning the glass and occasionally dusting the exhibits themselves.

If and when new diorama needs pop up, usually for Sarah Haas restoration’s sake, freelance taxidermists and muralists are employed.

And the museum no longer sends people out to “collect” new specimens.

Instead, they rely on never-ending streams of donated dead things: road kill donated from state or federal agencies, or the dead birds that accumulate, both inside and out, at Denver International Airport. These new specimens will most likely arrive and stay in the museum’s hidden archives where they will be reserved for scientific needs.

Which is to say that to look toward the future of the museum diorama is to look toward the preservation of those that already exist. Any new spending will go toward remodeling the halls, probably to make them more interactive and user-friendly.

To be fair though, any pronouncement of the death of the diorama would be premature. To the contrary, the profession of taxidermy is, according to the London Taxidermy Academy, experiencing something of a modern resurgence, as private markets swell with demand for dead animals brought back to life and new artisans lining up to be trained in their morbid production.

It seems that, faced with a dying planet, memento mori, Latin for “remember you will die,” is once again relevant, both in practice and philosophy, and that there may be no better symbol for the fate we are beginning to imagine for our planet, and our species, than the nature diorama itself. If art is the human expression of the soul, it is only fitting that its ultimate form would Boulder Weekly

be that of putting the dead on display so that we might better understand the point of all this living. And yet it’s a tad ironic that the diorama, conceived as a means to achieve our planet’s conservation, now threatens to stand a totem of its fate.

But all hope is not lost, for on this particular Saturday afternoon, when the diorama halls are bustling, there is proof that people are still drawn, like moths to a flame, to the dramatic light of the diorama.

An elderly man stands in front of a pride of African lions and tells his grown daughter about a long-ago trip he took to Botswana. A family in the Colorado room remembers a time when they were high up in the subalpine and saw a marmot, just like the one on the other side of the glass.

And a little girl, pretending to talk into her mother’s cell phone, peers into a diorama, describing it to A handmade paper flower her imaginary made as a friend, a smile study for a diorama, now widening across in the Denver her face as she Museum of Natural History does. archives.

She tells about the cactuses, squat and prickly, and about the sand that looks hot, and about how a little rodent is using a leaf to keep cool in the hot desert sun. And suddenly she lets out a gasp and drops the phone and starts jumping up and down with glee. At first she’s speechless, pointing at a little butterfly resting on a pale pink flower, and when words return to her, she’s stumbling over them, trying to convince her skeptical mother that, yes, the butterfly actually flapped its wings.

On one hand it’s impossible — after all, dioramas are not real. But on the other, maybe it did, whether by a trick of the trade or a trick of the mind.

Either way, does it really matter, if, even for just for a moment, we succumb to awe and marvel at the natural world, as if it were something incapable of being taken for granted?

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Keith Berson

I

overtones

t only seems appropriate that John Craigie is on a road trip when he takes my call. The California-born, Portland-based singer-songwriter is known as a modern-day troubadour, a traveling poet with comic flare, whose folk songs chronicle his journey through life and those he meets along the way.

“Most of it is from human interaction; I tend to find that the songs are either my stories or stories that I hear from somebody else,” Craigie says about his music. “I’ve learned that if you’re really honest with your audience and show them who you are, that’s the best you can do.”

His songs are mostly vignettes, flashes of humanity that tap into a deep folk heritage, speaking to the present moment in timeless fashion.

“It’s like a funeral out there/Don’t let the darkness break you my friends/ There are so many of us/ And only one of him,” he sings in “Presidential Silver Lining,” a song Craigie wrote in 15 minutes before a show right after the 2016 election, hoping to encourage the audience.

Then there’s “I wrote Mr. Tambourine Man,” which is Craigie’s latest release, recorded live with fellow singer-songwriter Jack Johnson.

As Craigie tells it on stage, he wrote the song after a night in a New Orleans bar where he met a guy who told him he wrote “Mr. Tambourine Man,” but Bob Dylan stole it from him.

“I decided in that moment I would steal everything else he said and put it into my song,” Craigie says on the recording. “I figured if it worked for Bob, maybe it could work for me.”

Harmonica melodies and a rowdy drum beat surround the strum of acoustic guitars.

“When the apocalypse is over/I hope you like your job/Ain’t it a shame/ Nobody sets anybody free anymore.”

Although he has several studio recordings, Craigie really shines on his live albums, which are reminiscent of Dylan’s sparse live recordings, but interspersed with spoken tracks, where Craigie channels the spirit of latecomedian Mitch Hedberg in both vocal cadence and intonation.

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John Craigie delivers poignant folk messages with comic flare

by Angela K. Evans Emulating his folk heroes like Arlo Park at a bar, back in my bar days, and I Guthrie, John Prine and Loudon remember I did the gig and then I was Wainwright, Craigie has also been going to sleep in my Astrovan that had inspired by humorous singers like a bed in it,” he says. “There was a therAdam Sandler and New Zealand duo mometer in it and it said minus 1 Flight of the Conchords. For Craigie, degree. For a California boy, I was just it’s all about the dance between what like, ‘We’re all going to die.’” his website calls “humorous storytelling So he went back into the bar, and and serious folk.” told the bartender he was afraid to “In the early days, I sleep in his car. In turn, realized that if I was too the bartender offered ON THE BILL: John funny and then I played Craigie his keys, and Craigie. 7 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 13, eTown Hall, 1535 a serious song, people said, “I have to stay here Spruce St., Boulder. would say, ‘What’s until closing time, but Tickets are $21. that?’” he says. “So that the guest room is third balance is necessary.” door on the left.”

Background converThe room was freezsation and radio, along with the sound ing when Craigie got there, so he just of wind swirling around the car as it put on all of his clothes and crawled moves down the road, intersperse our into bed. In the middle of the night, he conversation. It’s just before the woke up to snow all over the room. “I Thanksgiving holiday and Craigie is looked and the drapes were closed but with the folk group Shook Twins, trav- the window had been left open. I actueling to an annual holiday show in ally would have been better off sleeping Sandpoint, Idaho. He’s technically on in my car,” Craigie laughs. “But I surbreak from his fall Keep it Warm Tour, vived and that’s always been a thing for during which he’s collecting new/gently me.” used jackets, gloves, hats, scarves and It’s hard to say what really came socks, as well as donating $1 from each first, the wanderlust or the music. For ticket sale to area nonprofits working Craigie, the two seem intimately interwith the homeless population. (Bridge twined, one almost impossible without House is the beneficiary for the the other, and both a way of life for the Boulder show.) foreseeable future.

“Portland has a large homeless “When you like doing something, problem, as do many large cities, and it’s hard to imagine not doing it,” it’s always on my mind as it gets coldCraigie says, without being clear if he’s er,” Craigie explains. talking about music, his vagabond life, It’s something he can relate to, as he or both. started his career as somewhat of a vag“It’s what keeps me inspired, it’s abond, traveling from city to city, unsure what keeps giving me material,” he says, of where he might end up each night but attempting to clarify. “And I’m not that hoping to book gigs along the way. into staying in one place for too long, I “One time I was playing in Winter never have been.”

THURSDAY DECEMBER 6 7:00 PM

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STARS AND MOONS 3:00 PM

BEARS AND AURORA OF ALASKA 4:30 PM

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Boulder Weekly

a r t s & culture Everything classical for the holidays The things you expect, and a few you don’t, are on the program by Peter Alexander

T

he Nutcracker and the Mouse King have fought their annual battles, the flowers have waltzed and several Messiahs have been sung, but there’s still a lot of holiday music to come.

In fact, there is one more chance to catch the Sugar Plum Fairy, when Centennial State Ballet presents The Nutcracker Dec. 21–23 at Niwot High School. Their 18th annual production of Tchaikovsky’s beloved ballet features a live orchestra and guest artist Matthew Helms from Boulder Ballet.

In the meantime, here are the other holiday performances from the classical music world in and around Boulder.

First up — and likely sold out by the time this article runs — is the annual CU Holiday Festival performance (Dec. 7–9) at Macky Auditorium. Featuring student bands, choirs and orchestras from the CU School of Music, this annual concert of holiday favorites is one of Boulder’s most popular events. This year’s program features “Silent Night,” Leroy Anderson’s “Sleigh Ride,” dances from The Nutcracker and the “Hallelujah Chorus” from Messiah. Every year I remind readers: If you don’t want to miss out, start planning now for next year’s performances.

Local choral groups offer their own individual takes on the holiday season.

Conductor Thomas Edward Morgan and Ars Nova Singers usually come up with a CU Holiday Festival 7:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 7 1 and 4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 8 4 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 9 Macky Auditorium, 1595 Pleasant St., Boulder Tickets (if not sold out): cupresents. org/event/1622/cu-holiday-festival/ holiday-festival/ In the Moon of Wintertime: Christmas with Ars Nova 7:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 7, St. Johns Episcopal, 1419 Pine St., Boulder 4 p.m.

Sunday, Dec. 9, St. Paul Community of Faith, 1600 Grant St., Denver 7:30 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 13, St. Johns Episcopal, 1419 Pine St., Boulder Boulder Weekly

distinctive program, and this year is no exception. The first half of “In the Moon at Wintertime” (Dec. 7, 9, 13 and 15) will be the world premiere of The Consolation of Apollo by Kile Smith, a work written to celebrate the 50th anniversary of Apollo 8.

The flight, which provided the iconic “Earthrise” photo, entered lunar orbit on Christmas Eve 1968. For his text, Smith chose portions of transcripts from Apollo 8’s communications from

ly made crafts. Artistic Director Vicki Burrichter conducts the performances.

The Longmont Symphony’s annual Candlelight Concert will be presented in conjunction with the Longmont Chorale Singers and soprano Ekaterina Kotcherguina. Schubert’s Mass in G will form a portion of the program followed

by Vaughan Williams’ Fantasia on Greensleeves and other music for the Christmas season. The LSO’s Elliot Moore and Scott Hamlin Casey A. Cass, University of Colorado from the Longmont Chorale will share conducting duties.

This year’s holiday guest attraction for CU Presents will be “Christmas Time is Here,” performed by the Canadian Brass (Dec. 17).

Known for performing in tuxedos and running shoes, the group keeps renewing itself with younger players.

This is another event that is on schedule to sell out, so check the web page before getting your hopes up.

The Boulder Chamber Orchestra offers “The Gift of space, combined with selections from Music” as the final classical concert on our The Consolation of Philosophy by the 6thholiday schedule (Dec. 21–22). The procentury author Boethius. After intermis- gram includes a Mozart Piano Concerto sion, Ars Nova will perform both tradialong with Corelli’s “Christmas Concerto” tional music and rarely-heard music for and some attractive arrangements of the holiday season.

Christmas music by — off all unlikely Boulder Chorale gathers all of its sources — Arnold Schoenberg. This is not constituent organizations, including both the Schoenberg of groundbreaking atonaladult and children’s choirs, for their ity: conductor Bahman Saless promises annual holiday performances (Dec. music that is easy to enjoy.

15-16). This year’s program, titled “Let Performance details and ticket inforYour Heart be Light,” will include a holi- mation on these holiday events is given day market with baked goods and localbelow.

7:30 p.m. Saturday Dec. 15, UCC, 1500 Ninth Ave., Longmont Tickets: arsnovasingers.org Let Your Heart Be Light Boulder Chorale, Vicki Burrichter, conductor 4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 15, and Sunday, Dec. 16 First United Methodist Church, 1421 Spruce St., Boulder Tickets: boulderchorale.org/events/ Candlelight Concert Longmont Symphony, Longmont Chorale and Ekaterina Kotcherguina, soprano 4 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 16

Westview Presbyterian Church, 15th and Hover, Longmont Tickets: longmontsymphony.org/concerts/candlelightconcert/ Christmas Time is Here Canadian Brass 7:30 p.m. Monday, Dec. 17 Macky Auditorium, 1595 Pleasant St., Boulder Tickets: tickets.cupresents.org The Gift of Music Boulder Chamber Orchestra, Bahman Saless, conductor — with David Korevaar, piano 7:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21, Broomfield Auditorium, 3 Community Park Road, Broomfield

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Kane Hibberd

LIVE ETOWN RADIO SHOW TAPING — WITH JOHN BUTLER (SOLO) AND ELIZA GILKYSON. 7 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 11, eTown Hall, 1535 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-443-8696. Tickets are $30.

John Butler’s most recent record is a solo effort that reflects on Butler’s experience with anxiety, family life, love and what it means to be a post-modern man. Joining him is Eliza Gilkyson, a twice Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter whose songs have been covered

by Joan Baez, Bob Geldof, Tom Rush and Roseanne Cash.

see EVENTS Page 32

13TH ANNUAL ROCKING IN A WINTER WONDERLAND ROCK ART SHOW AND SALE. 6 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 6, The Riverside, 1724 Broadway, Boulder, 720-443-2322.

Join award-winning rock Lisa Siciliano ’n’ roll photographer Lisa Siciliano as she hosts her 13th annual rock art show and sale, Rocking in a Winter Wonderland! Free for all ages and open from 6 p.m. until midnight, Rocking in a Winter Wonderland offers thousands of prints, all shot on film, available for sale for every budget (ranging in price from $10 to $1,000). Stay for the live music from local talent MasterBlasterG, The Red Tack, The Angle, Isabella’s Random Band, Sun Jr., Far Side of the Mountain and Robert Rowe.

Boulder Weekly

AERIAL INGENUITY (A.I.).

HAZEL MILLER BENEFIT CONCERT.

7:30 p.m. Friday, Dec. 7, Dairy Arts Center, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-245-8272. More dates through Dec. 9.

6 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 8, Boulder Shambhala Center, 1345 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-444-0190.

In Aerial Ingenuity, Courtesy of Frequent Flyers Frequent Flyers explores the intersection of technology and aerial dance, inviting audience members to explore the interaction of the human experience, art, ideas and the “made world” of technology through interactive environments and breathtaking airborne performance.

Live music provided

by Hugh Lobel and Miles Wilder. Interactive music devices created by Jiffer Harriman, Lisa and Matt Bethancourt of Mouse and the Billionaire.

Tickets are $26-$28.

Courtesy of Hazel Miller Colorado’s premier R&B and jazz vocalist Hazel Miller and her four-piece band will cover jazz standards and funky R&B grooves for this special evening to benefit the Boulder Shambhala Center. In addition to music, the evening will include a silent auction presenting all sorts of dharma treasures, as well as items for holiday gifts for friends and family. Each ticket includes a free drink at the Connie Rogers Bar and the delights of a catered appetizer buffet. Tickets are $20: www. brownpapertickets.com/event/3896743

December 6 , 2018 31

words

events Sunday, Dec. 9 BAFS Second Sundays Poetry Workshop. 2 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder.

‘Nevertheless, We Persisted: 48 Voices of Defiance, Strength, and Courage’ is a powerful collection of essays from actors, activists, athletes, politicians, musicians, writers and teens, each writing about a time in their youth when they were held back because of their race, gender or sexual identity, but persisted.

Holocaust survivor Fanny Starr tells of her harrowing time in Auschwitz, where she watched her family disappear, one by one. 7 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 6 at Tattered Cover on Colfax.

Brad Bawmann — Beagle on Board. 2 p.m.

Tattered Cover Book Store, 2526 E. Colfax Ave., Denver.

Sunday Night Poetry Slam. 7 p.m. Mercury Cafe, 2199 California St., Denver.

Monday, Dec. 10 So, You’re a Poet. 9 p.m. Wesley Chapel, 1290 Folsom St., Boulder.

Tuesday, Dec. 11

Thursday, Dec. 6

Saturday, Dec. 8

Tattered Tales Storytime. 10:30 a.m. Tattered Cover Book Store, 2526 E. Colfax Ave., Denver.

Chris McGreal — American Overdose. 7 p.m.

Tattered Cover Book Store, 1628 16th St., Denver.

Boulder Writing Dates. 9 a.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1301 Pennsylvania Ave., Boulder.

Advanced Poetry Workshop. 5:30 p.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1301 Pennsylvania Ave., Boulder.

Tattered Tales Storytime. 10:30 a.m. Tattered Cover Book Store, 1628 16th St., Denver.

Writers’ Group. 6 p.m. Longmont Public Library, 409 Fourth Ave., Longmont.

Minor Disturbance Weekly Workshop + Open Mic. 1 p.m. Prodigy Coffeehouse, 3801 E. 40th Ave., Denver.

Innisfree Weekly Open Poetry Reading. 7 p.m.

Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1301 Pennsylvania Ave., Boulder.

Cassandra Clare with Paolo Bacigalupi — Queen of Air and Darkness. 7 p.m. Trinity United Methodist Chruch, 1820 Broadway, Denver.

Verne Lundquist — Play by Play. 7 p.m.

Tattered Cover Book Store, 2526 E. Colfax Ave., Denver.

Fanny Starr — Neverless, We Persisted. 7 p.m. Tattered Cover Book Store, 2526 E. Colfax Ave., Denver.

Friday, Dec. 7 Write Your Story Writing Class. 10 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Open Poetry Reading. 10 p.m. Mercury Cafe, 2199 California St., Denver.

EVENTS from Page 31

Thursday, December 6 Music The Black Lillies. 8 p.m. Globe Hall, 4483 Logan St., Denver, 303-296-1003.

Grateful Shred. 8 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-447-0095.

Dominick Antonelli, Haley Gowland, Zy’ev Left Hand. 7 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

Jeff Plankenhorn. 7:30 p.m. Swallow Hill Music, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Henry Cho. 7:30 p.m. Comedy Works, 1226 15th St., Denver, 303-595-3637. More show times at comedyworks.com.

Events Climate Solidarity Fiesta: An Artivist Fundraiser. 6:30 p.m. The Westin Denver Downtown, 1672 Lawrence St., Denver, 303-572-9100.

The Hidden Holiday Bazaar. 10 a.m. The Hidden Holiday Bazaar, 2330 Main St., Suite D, Longmont, 720-340-9951. Through Dec. 31.

Surviving Skokie — with Director Eli Adler.

Noon. Boulder Jewish Community Center, 6007 Oreg Ave., Boulder, 720-749-2531.

Particle — with Autonomix. 9 p.m. Cervantes Masterpiece, 2637 Welton St., Denver, 303-297-1772.

CSED Week: Designing with Cubelets: How to Think Like a Robot. 5 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

theater

Mapache. 7 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-447-0095.

20th Animation Show of Shows. 4:30 p.m.

Dairy Arts Center, Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826. More show times at thedairy.org.

Cícero R. C. Omena via Wikimedia Commons

In ‘The House of Ramon Iglesia,’ relationships among immigrant family members turn cold as they confront living in a country that will never be their own, while recalling and recovering the roots that hold them fast to their native land. Playing Dec. 7 through Dec. 9 at University Theatre.

A Christmas Carol. Denver Center for the Performing Arts, Stage Theatre, 1101 13th St., Denver. Through Dec. 24.

A Christmas Carol. Miners Alley Playhouse, 1224 Washington Ave., Golden.

Through Dec. 23.

A Christmas Carol — The Radio Show.

Vintage Theatre, Vintage Theatre, 1468 Dayton St., Aurora. Through Dec. 23.

Alone for the Holidays. Denvers Dangerous Theatre, 2620 W. Second Ave., Denver.

Through Dec. 23.

32 December 6 , 2018

CSED Week: Robot Alley. 4 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Ryan Chrys and The Rough Cuts. 6 p.m. The Tasty Weasel, 1800 Pike Road, Longmont, 303-776-1914.

The Christmas Spirit — presented by Firehouse Theater Company.

The John Hand Theater, 7653 E. First Place, Denver. Through Dec. 22.

A Christmas Story. BDT Stage, 5501 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder.

Through Jan. 5.

Coyote. Badger.

Rattlesnake.

Buntport Theater, 717 Lipan St., Denver. Through Dec. 22.

Elf, The Musical. Arvada Center for the Arts and Humanities, 6901 Wadsworth Blvd., Arvada.

Through Dec. 23.

The House of Ramon Iglesia. University Theatre, Acting Studio, 1515 Central Campus Mall, Boulder.

Opens Dec. 7. Through Dec. 9.

The Humans. Curious Theatre Company, 1080 Acoma St., Denver. Through Dec. 22.

Irving Berlin’s White Christmas. Denver Center for Performing Arts, Buell Theatre, 14th and Curtis streets, Denver. Through Dec. 15.

Holiday Afternoon Tea. 2 p.m. Chautauqua Dining Hall, 900 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-440-7666. More times at chautauqua.com.

Monty Franklin. 8 p.m. Comedy Works, 1226 15th St., Denver, 303-595-3637. More show times at comedyworks.com. see EVENTS Page 34

Joaquin’s Christmas. Su Teatro Theatre Company, 721 Santa Fe Drive, Denver.

Through Dec. 23.

Kanabbis Family Holiday Special. Denvers Dangerous Theatre, 2620 W. Second Ave., Denver. Through Dec. 29.

Miss Bennet — presented by Boulder Ensemble Theatre Company. Dairy Arts Center, Grace Gamm Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder.

Through Dec. 24.

Mosque — presented by Fearless Theatre Company. The Bakery Arts Warehouse, 2132 Market St., Denver. Through Dec. 15.

Santa’s Big Red Sack. Avenue Theater, 417 E. 17th Ave., Denver. Through Dec. 24.

Scrooge Bah Humbug. Jesters Dinner Theatre, 224 Main St., Longmont. Through Dec. 30.

Scrooge! The musical. Candlelight Dinner Playhouse, 4747 Marketplace Drive, Johnstown.

Through Dec. 31.

Underneath the Lintel — presented by TreeLine Theater. Dairy Center for the Arts, Carsen Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder.

Through Dec. 9.

Xanadu. Denver Center for Performing Arts, Garner Galleria Theatre, 1101 13th St., Denver.

Through March 31.

Boulder Weekly

Saturday, December 8, 11am - 4pm* | Downtown Boulder Join us for a celebration of winter with Freezie the Snowman! Free face-painting, train rides, photo booth, holiday carolers, kid's crafts, visit with Santa & Freezie & a special performance by Guerilla Fanfare! Stop by the Capital One Cafe for free hot cocoa, coffee or tea.

Head in to participating businesses throughout downtown to find a plush Freezie, bring him back to the Visitor Information Center (1303 Pearl Street) to win a gift card!

Art Mart Gifts - 1326 Pearl St Art Source International Inc. - 1237 Pearl St Ben & Jerry's - 1203 Pearl St Bodywork Bistro - 1100 Spruce St Boulder Arts & Crafts Gallery - 1421 Pearl St Boulder Book Store - 1107 Pearl St Canova Home - 1200 Pearl St Capital One Café - 1247 Pearl St Color Me Mine Boulder - 1938 Pearl St Cured - 1825 Pearl St Experimac Boulder - 1468 Pearl St Freebird Stores - 1142 Pearl St

Fresh Produce - 1219 Pearl St Goorin Bros. Hat Shop - 943 Pearl St Hotel Boulderado - 2115 13th St Into The Wind - 1408 Pearl St Jackalope & Co. - 1126 Pearl St Kilwins - 1430 Pearl St Ku Cha House of Tea - 1211 Pearl St Liberty Puzzles - 1468 Pearl St Liquor Mart - 1750 15th St ONE Boulder Fitness - 1800 Broadway Pedestrian Shops - 1425 Pearl St Peppercorn - 1235 Pearl St

prAna - 1147 Pearl St Rebecca's Herbal Apothecary & Supply 1227 Spruce St Red Fox Outdoor Equipment - 1218 Pearl St Savory Spice - 2041 Broadway Savvy on Pearl - 1114 Pearl St Sherpani - 1711 Pearl St Topo Designs - 935 Pearl St. Trident Booksellers and Cafe - 940 Pearl St Weekends - 1200 Pearl St Where the Buffalo Roam - 1320 Pearl St Zeal Optics - 1230 Spruce St

FreezieFest.com

arts

events Courtesy Naropa University/ Stephen Parlato

Naropa University presents Stephen Parlato’s new work ‘Strong Women in Bloom’ in the Lincoln Gallery on the Arapahoe Campus Through Dec. 15.

Nexus — by Mark Brasuell. Naropa University, 3285 30th St., Boulder. Through Dec. 17. penumbra — by Diane Martonis. Dairy Arts Center, McMahon Gallery, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder.

Opens Nov. 30. Through Jan. 13.

REMBRANDT: Painter as Printmaker. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver.

Through Jan. 6.

Live Entertainment Nightly at our 1709 Pearl St location

Small Wood Sculptures — by Charles Counter. Longmont Museum, 400 Quail Road, Longmont. Through Jan. 6.

THURSDAY DECEMBER 6

DOMINICK ANTONELLI 8PM ZY’EV LEFT HAND 9PM RAMAYA & THE TROUBADOURS 8PM

RABBLEFISH 8PM

THURSDAY DECEMBER 13

SILVER STEVEN / ANDREW STURTZ & COURTLYN CARPENTER / ALLIE CHIPKIN 8PM FRIDAY DECEMBER 14

LUCAS WOLF 8PM HAL MAYFIELD 9PM Happy Hour 4-8 Every Day THELAUGHINGGOAT.COM 34 December 6 , 2018

EYES ON Shimabuku. Denver Art Museum, Hamilton Building - Level 4, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver. Through Feb. 3.

Tara Donovan: Fieldwork. Museum of Contemporary Art Denver, 1485 Delgany St., Denver.

Through Jan. 27.

Field/Ground — by Sandy and Terry Lane and Jennifer Pettus. Naropa University, Nalanda Campus, The Cube Gallery, 6287 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder. Through Dec. 14.

Type/Cast — by Joel Swanson. Dairy Arts Center, Hand-Rudy & MacMillan Family Gallery, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder. Opens Nov. 30.

Through Jan. 13.

Florian Hecker: Synopsis Seriation. CU Art Museum, 1085 18th St., Boulder.

Through Dec. 22.

Watercolor — by Nancy Sullo. NCAR’s Mesa Laboratory, 1850 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder.

Through Jan. 4.

Fossils: Clues to the Past. University of Colorado Museum of Natural History, Paleontology Hall, 15th and Broadway Boulder.

Ongoing exhibit.

Where the Body Sits and Learns — by Benjamin Rogers. Dairy Arts Center, Polly Addison Gallery, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder.

Through Jan. 13

Ganesha: The Playful Protector. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver.

Through Jan. 13.

Worlds Suspended in Reality. Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art, 1750 13th St., Boulder.

Through Jan. 20.

Google Garage. Museum of Boulder, 2205 Broadway, Boulder. Ongoing, but activities change.

World War II Diary Transcribed at the Museum. Lyons Redstone Museum, 340 High St., Lyons. Ongoing exhibit.

Documenting Change: Our Climate, the Rockies. CU Art Museum, 1085 18th St., Boulder. Through May 2019.

LIV PHOENIX 8PM ALEX SNYDER & MAYA BENNETT 9PM

WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 12

All Aboard! Railroads in Lyons. Lyons Redstone Museum, 340 High St., Lyons.

DIOR: From Paris to the World. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Avenue Parkway, Denver.

Opens Nov. 18. Through March 3.

SUNDAY DECEMBER 9

EXPRESSO! 8PM

Strong Women in Bloom — by Stephen Parlato. Naropa University, Arapahoe Campus, Lincoln Gallery, 2130 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder.

Through Dec. 15.

Cut Paper Wildlife Sculptures — By Tiffany Russell. NCAR’s Mesa Laboratory, 1850 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder. Through Jan. 4.

MIRIAM MCQUEEN 8PM ADAM STIGALL BAND 9PM

TUESDAY DECEMBER 11

EYES ON Julie Buffalohead. Denver Art Museum, Hamilton Building (Level 4), 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver. Through Feb. 3.

Colorado’s Most Significant Artifacts. Lyons Redstone Museum, 340 High St., Lyons.

Ongoing exhibit.

SATURDAY DECEMBER 8

JARRAD MENARD 8PM JULIAN DAVIS 9PM JASON BRANDT 10PM

100 Paintings for 100 Years — by Trine Bumiller. Naropa University, Nalanda Campus, 6287 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder. Through Dec. 14.

Clas Oldenburg with Coosje Van Bruggen.

Denver Art Museum, Hamilton Building (Level 2), 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver.

Through Jan. 6.

FRIDAY DECEMBER 7

MONDAY DECEMBER 10

Making Headlines. Firehouse Art Center, Main Gallery, 667 Fourth Ave., Longmont.

Through Dec. 8.

Eat Well, Play Well. Museum of Boulder, 2205 Broadway, Boulder. Through Jan. 6.

EVENTS from Page 32

The Nutcracker. 7:30 p.m. Ellie Caulkins Opera House, 1101 13th St., Denver, 303-837-8888.

Through Dec. 24.

On Her Shoulders. 2:30 p.m. and 7 p.m. Dairy Arts Center, Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826. More show times at thedairy.com.

Out Boulder County Gender Support Group. 7 p.m. Boulder PrideHouse, 2132 14th St., Boulder.

Pablo Francisco. 7:30 p.m. Improv, 8246 Northfield Blvd., Denver, 303-307-1777. More show times at denver.improv.com.

Friday, December 7 Music Andrew Wynne. 6 p.m. Upslope Brewing Co., 1501 Lee Hill Drive, Boulder, 720-365-695.

Emily Barnes. 6:30 p.m. Still Cellars, 1115 Colorado Ave., Longmont, 720-204-6064.

Homevibe and eTown present: Paul Kimbiris.

7 p.m. eTown Hall, 1535 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-443-8696.

A Human Named David. 7 p.m. Longtucky Spirits, 350 Terry St., Longmont, 973-420-158.

In the Moon of Wintertime: Christmas with Ars Nova. 7:30 p.m. St. John’s Episcopal Church, 1419 Pine St., Boulder, 303-499-3165.

John Pizzarelli. 8 p.m. Soiled Dove Underground, 7401 E. First Ave., Denver, 303-830-9214.

Los Chicos Malos. 7 p.m. Caffè Sole, 637 S. Broadway St., Boulder, 303-499-2985.

Ookay: Bad Habits Tour 2018. 9 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-447-0095.

Pink Talking Fish featuring The Giant Country Horns — with Special Guests. 9 p.m.

Cervantes Masterpiece, 2637 Welton St., Denver, 303-297-1772.

Ramaya & The Troubadours. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

Tiffany Christopher Duo. 7:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Tap Room, 921 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-776-1914.

The Wood Brothers. 7 p.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

Events Art of Data Opening Reception. 6 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Artastic Holiday Market. 11 a.m. Horizons K8 School, 4545 Sioux Drive, Boulder, 720-561-3600.

Boulder Opera Presents: Little Red Riding Hood. 4 p.m. The Nomad Theatre, 1410 Quince Ave., Boulder, 303-443-7510. Through Dec. 9, boulderoperacompany.com.

CSED Week: Robotics with BlocklyProp Course for Educators. 9 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Downtown Longmont Holiday Cheer Walking Tour. 5:30 p.m. Sixth Avenue Plaza, Main Street and Sixth Avenue, Longmont.

Henry Cho. 7:15 p.m. Comedy Works, 1226 15th St., Denver, 303-595-3637. More show times at comedyworks.com.

HO HO Hoedown To Hollywood. 8 p.m. First United Methodist Church Boulder, 1421 Spruce St., Boulder, 321-402-2861.

Holiday Open House. 3 p.m. Louisville Public Library, 951 Spruce St., Louisville, 303-335-4820.

Holiday Sale: Studio Arts Boulder. 3 p.m. prAna Boulder, 1147 Pearl St., Basement Floor, Boulder, 720-379-6033. Through Dec. 9.

Longmont Lights Holiday Festival & Parade.

5 p.m. Memorial Building, 700 Longs Peak Ave., Longmont, 303-651-8404.

Monty Franklin. 7:30 p.m. and 9:45 p.m. Comedy Works, 1226 15th St., Denver, 303-595-3637.

More show times at comedyworks.com.

Moscow Ballet’s Great Russian Nutcracker.

7 p.m. Paramount Denver, 1621 Glenarm Place, Denver, 303-623-0106. Through Dec. 8.

Playtime Storytime: CSED Week Robots!

10:15 a.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Skyline Booster Club’s Holiday Market. 6 p.m.

Skyline High School, 600 E. Mountain View Ave., Longmont, 720-494-3741.

Spanish Modern Literature Club. 4 p.m.

Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Saturday, December 8 Music Adam Stigall Band. 9 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

After Midnight Jazz Band. 7 p.m. Caffè Sole, 637 S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-499-2985.

see EVENTS Page 36

Boulder Weekly

UPCOMING AT eTOWN HALL

Thursday december 6

ParTicle

w/ auTonomix

Friday december 7

Pink Talking Phish

FeaT gianT counTry horns w/ wake uP & live (bob marley TribuTe)

Thursday december 6

grass For ThaT ass PresenTs

brad Parsons & sTarbird w/ grassFed

Friday december 7

Travis ThomPson

Saturday december 8 • dual venue!

PresenTs “The yougood? Tour coming To denver, co” w/ TheycallhimaP, doze & audible

FeaT kyle hollingsworTh band w/ exmag, TnerTle, casual commander & nobide

The hang wiTh Jessica Jones

sunday december 9

wednesday december 12 re: search

kyle hollingsworTh’s hoPPy holidays Felly

w/ gyyPs & TriP carTer

Tuesday december 11

monday december 10

w/ avry, mikey Thunder & Jordan Polovina

thurSday december 13 • dual venue!

w/ cualli, magneTik & Precious hill

FeaT dJ craze, daddy kev, dJ Taye & dieselboy

w/ lily Fangz & wriTe minded

uniTed sTaTes oF bass Friday december 14

ill.gaTes live a/v seT w/ sTylusT, kowTa & kavsko

saTurday december 15

The Travelin’ mccoury’s w/ Pick & howl, scoTT slay & The rail

Friday december 21

Jade cicada & deTox uniT saTurday december 22

broTher ali

w/ reason The ciTizen

Friday december 28

blind melon

saTurday december 29

curren$y

monday december 31

dean ween grouP dumPsTaPhunk

Friday & saTurday January 4-5

sTring mounTain revival FeaT ben kauFmann & adam aiJala (yonder mounTain sTring band), larry keel, noam Pikelny (Punch broThers), sierra hull & bridgeT law (elePhanT revival) w/ kiTchen dwellers

Friday January 11

Think - TribuTe To areTha Franklin

FeaT kim dawson (maTador soul sounds), Jeremy salken (big giganTic), & more

saTurday January 12

xiuhTezcaTl

monday december 17

The hang wiTh Jessica Jones Tuesday december 18 reggae Tuesdays

akae beka

(voice oF midnighT) w/ PoliculTure & gydnce FeaT members oF TaTanka

wednesday december 19 re: search

FeaT ana sia & ill-esha

The herman clan

Friday & saTurday december 21-22

Joey PorTer’s shady business

FeaT Jenn harTswick (Trey anasTasio band), michelangelo carubba (Turkuaz), dJ williams (karl denson’s Tiny universe), nick cassarino (nTh Power), naTe edgar (nTh Power), gabe mervine & drew sayers (The moTeT) 12/21: d-vibes waTermelon Funk (oF marcus king band) 12/22: analog son

ihF

w/ volo

zilla

monday december 31

cory henry & The Funk aPosTles

saTurday January 26

Thursday January 3

FeaT sTeve kimock, maTT buTler (everyone orchesTra), bill Payne (liTTle FeaT), george gekas (revivalisTs) w/ new orleans susPecTs PerForming The music oF liTTle FeaT

(FeaT members oF dead Phish orchesTra & more) & bear Tread w/ sTeePland sTring band

Friday February 8

ThriFTworks w/ gooPsTePPa

saTurday February 9

The greyboy allsTars saTurday February 16

groundaTion

wednesday February 20 re:search

FeaT nighTmares on wax (dJ seT) saTurday February 23

deTroiT love: carl craig & moodymann Friday march 1

norTh mississiPPi allsTars saTurday march 2

acTion bronson Thursday march 7

lil mosey

saTurday march 9

brassTracks

sTeely dead

Friday & saTurday January 4-5

dr. klaw

FeaT eric krasno, adam deiTch, nigel hall, ian neville, cyril neville & nick daniels 1/4: lyle divinsky’s soul survivors 1/5: casey russell & The soul shack

Thursday January 10

kris lager band

w/ winsTon ramble, exTra gold

saTurday January 12

sTeveland swaTkins & The PosiTive agenda

w/ sPecial TribuTe To erykah badu & d’angelo FeaT kowan Turner and sPecial guesTs

Homevibe & eTown present

Craigie 13 John w #KeepItWarm2018 & Rainbow Girls

SOLD OUT Dec

17

Radio Show Taping

Gregory Alan Isakov & Rayland Baxter

1/20 Radio Taping: William Fitzsimmons & more TBA 1/26 Concert: Foxfeather & Monacle

Friday & saTurday January 25-26

dave waTTs birThday bash

FeaT dave waTTs, garreTT sayers, lyle divinsky (The moTeT), ian neville (dumPsTaPhunk), JeFF Franca (Thievery corPoraTion), maTT JalberT (Tauk), sTeve waTkins, kim dawson, nick gerlach, gabe mervine & Tanya shylock

Thursday January 31

armchair boogie & The higgs (laTe seT)

WHERE: eTOWN Hall 1535 Spruce Street Boulder, CO 80302 TICKETS: eTOWN.org

Friday & saTurday February 8-9

greyboy allsTars TexT cervanTes To 91944 For TickeT giveaways, drink sPecials, discounTed TickeT PromoTions & more

Max 15 Msg/Mo. Msg & data rates May apply text stop to opt out for our privacy terMs & service go to http://cervantesMasterpiece.ticketfly.coM/files/2014/03/cervantes-privacy-docuMent.pdf

2637 Welton St • 303-297-1772 • cervantesmasterpiece.com

Boulder Weekly

Dec

marc rebilleT

w/ mikey Thunder & FlT FeaT Taylor Frederick, eric luba & will Trask

Friday January 25

bas

& Eliza Gilkyson

FeaT vince herman (leFTover salmon), silas herman, colin huFF & dan andree w/ TurkeyFooT & The cody sisTers

sunday december 30

saTurday February 2

11 John Butler

Thursday december 20

FeaT michael Travis (sTring cheese incidenT), aaron holsTein (vibesquad) & Jamie Janover w/ soulacybin

everyone’s dead

Radio Show Taping

grass For ThaT ass PresenTs

saTurday January 19

FeaT sTeve kimock, bill Payne (liTTle FeaT), naTalie cressman (Trey anasTasio band), Jeremy salken (big giganTic), george gekas (The revivalisTs) & brian moss (sPaFFord)

Dec

w/ lea luna, mikey Thunder & Jordan Polovina

saTurday december 29

everyone orchesTra

SOL D OU T

saTurday december 15

lucid vision & homemade sPaceshiP John medeski’s mad skilleT

Kind Hearted Strangers & Kevin Mileski

lunar Fire

Friday december 28

w/ borahm lee key-J seT (break science & PreTTy lighTs live)

Paul Kimbiris

Friday december 14

horseshoes & hand grenades Friday January 18

7

FeaT nasTynasTy & gladkill

dave easT

w/ shooTer, d Jones, errol vibes, dJ awall, rimes, Jay TriiiPle & swank sinaTra

Dec

Homevibe & eTown present

Book eTown Hall for your next event.

Contact digger@etown.org December 6 , 2018 35

events

CU BOULDER EVENTS For more information on any event, visit calendar.colorado.edu

LIVE MUSIC SATURDAYS

8:00pm NO COVER 12/8 STEREO COLLISION 12/15 KELLI SAID

THURSDAY, DEC. 6 The Regenerative Earth Summit: Food + Fiber + Climate.

FRIDAY, DEC. 7 Summit Supercomputer Tour.

11 a.m.-1 p.m. CINC Building, 102 1777 Exposition Drive, Boulder.

8 a.m.-6 p.m. Sustainability, En20-minute tours ergy and Environment including snacks, Community (SEEC), Courtesy of CU an introduction to 4001 Discovery Drive, research computBoulder. ing, and a tour of This Summit is the supercomputer designed to provide container. a context to build strategies and match resources across food Free screenings and fashion industries. feature CMCI

Guest Recital: American Piano Music: A Journey.

7:30 p.m. Imig Music, Chamber Hall (C199), 1020 18th St., Boulder.

South Korean pianist Kyu Yeon Park presents a recital featuring the music of 20th-century American composers.

Student Productions.

3 p.m. Museum of Natural History, Paleontology Hall, 1035 Broadway, Boulder.

A profile of archaeologist Earl Morris; What we can learn from fossilized dinosaur feces; Building a new exhibit; Repatriation of sacred relics; Story behind the Mahaffy Cache tool discovery; Preserving textiles.

2018 Holiday Festival: 40th Anniversary Season.

Macky Auditorium, 1595 Pleasant St., Boulder.

Performance dates and times: Friday, Dec. 7, 7:30 p.m.; Saturday, Dec. 8, 1 p.m.; Saturday, Dec. 8, 4 p.m.; Sunday, Dec. 9, 4 p.m.

FRESH: Fall 2018: A CU Dance Concert.

University Club, Charlotte York Irey Theatre, 972 Broadway, Boulder.

Enjoy a potential mix of hip hop, aerial, fusion forms and improvised offerings crafted by undergraduate and graduate dance students at the CU Theatre & Dance Department.

Performance dates and times: Dec. 7-8 at 7:30 p.m.

SATURDAY, DEC. 8 Family Day: Nature Never Sleeps.

10 a.m. Museum of Natural History, 1035 Broadway, Boulder.

Look up at the stars to chart your path, listen closely for the sounds of nocturnal animals scurrying, and learn all about what’s up when the sun goes down during this special program by the Nature’s Educators with live animals, followed by a special screening of Adventures in Science!

SUNDAY, DEC. 9 Probably Novel Podcast: Joe Castagneri.

7 p.m. Live signal link at CU Boulder Radio 1190: www.radio1190. org/schedule Join Grant Baker, Joe Castagneri and Matthew Maierhofer on another live show about exciting STEM research conducted by students at the University of Colorado. Email a question to probablynovel@gmail.com.

MONDAY, DEC. 10 Concert Band and Campus Orchestra.

7:30 p.m. Imig Music, Grusin Music Hall, 1020 18th St., Boulder.

TUESDAY, DEC. 11 Russian Film Series.

7 p.m. Eaton Humanities, 135, 1610 Pleasant St., Boulder.

For details, contact tatiana. mikhailova@colorado.edu.

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 12 Wonder-filled Wednesdays: Tree Ornaments!

9:30 a.m. Museum of Natural History, Discovery Corner, 1035 Broadway, Boulder.

Bring your favorite preschooler to our Discovery Corner for a hands-on introduction to the wonderful world of science and nature!

EVENTS from Page 34

Aqueous with Mungion. 7 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 716-785-7655.

Bankshot. 9 p.m. Globe Hall, 4483 Logan St., Denver, 303-296-1003.

12/22 ROOTS & RHYTHM 12/31 NEW YEAR’S EVE Get Your Tickets Today!

Breakfast with Santa. 9 a.m. Chautauqua Community House, 900 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-440-7666.

Caroling for Community. 5 p.m. Center for Musical Arts, 200 E. Baseline Road, Lafayette, 303-665-0599.

Charlie Brown goes to the Nutcracker. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 281-960-3501.

720-600-4875

TheWildGameLongmont.com 36 December 6 , 2018

Kyle Hollingsworth’s Hoppy Holidays. 9 p.m.

Cervantes’ and The Other Side, 2637 Welton St., Denver, 303-297-1772.

Heart and Hands Holiday Gift Market. 10 a.m.

Tara High School, 4180 19th St., Boulder, 303-440-4510. Through Dec. 9.

Miriam McQueen. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

Holiday Bazaar. Noon. Dairy Arts Center, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

The Ostdiek Family Band. 6 p.m. 300 Suns Brewing, 335 First Ave., Unit C, Longmont, 720-442-8292.

Holiday Parade of Lights. 5 p.m. Main Street, Longmont, Colorado, Longmont, 303-774-4694.

Policulture. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Tap Room, 921 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-776-1914.

Downtown Parade. 6 p.m. Crackpots Pottery Studio, 505 Main St., Longmont, 303-776-2211.

The Polish Ambassador. 7 p.m. Fillmore Auditorium, 1510 Clarkson St., Denver, 303-837-0360.

Prospect Holiday Market. 11 a.m. Prospect New Town, 2007 100 Year Party Court, Longmont, 720-494-0687.

Dance with Hazel Miller Benefit Concert. 6 p.m. Boulder Shambhala Center, 1345 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-444-0190.

Ringing in the Season. 7 p.m. First Congregational Church, 1128 Pine St., Boulder, 719-287-9754.

Skyline Booster Club’s Holiday Market. 9 a.m.

Skyline High School, 600 E. Mountain View Ave., Longmont, 720-494-3741.

Deborah Stafford and the State of Affairs.

7:30 p.m. Dannik’s Gunbarrel Corner Bar, 6525 Gunpark Drive, Boulder, 303-530-7423.

Stereo Collision. 8 p.m. The Wild Game Experience, 2251 Ken Pratt Blvd., Longmont, 720-600-4875.

Yoga Holiday Market in Eldorado Springs. 11 a.m. Eldorado Yoga Ashram, 2875 CO Road 67, Boulder, 303-249-1671. Through Dec. 9.

Definitely Mary Ann. 6 p.m. Bootstrap Brewing Company, 142 Pratt St., Longmont, 303-652-4186.

Events

Sunday, December 9

Bella Gaia: Beautiful Earth. 9 p.m. Fiske Planetarium, 2414 Regent Drive, Boulder, 303492-5002.

Music

Faux Fur Frenzy featuring GODLAZER and DJ Blue — with Special Guests. 7:30 p.m. The Caribou Room, 55 Indian Peaks Drive, Nederland, 303-258-3637.

LONGMONT CO 80501

Handcrafted Holiday Market. 10 a.m. Boulder County Fairgrounds, 9595 Nelson Road, Longmont. Through Dec. 9.

The Custom Shop. 8:30 p.m. The Speakeasy, 301 Main St., Longmont, 720-684-4728.

Erik Boa Duo. 4:30 p.m. The Tasty Weasel, 1800 Pike Road, Longmont, 303-776-1914.

2251 KEN PRATT BLVD

Kindred Spirits “Imagine Winter” Concert. 8 p.m. Swallow Hill Music, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-887-3608.

Four Year Anniversary Bash. Noon. Grossen Bart Brewery, 1025 Delaware Ave., Longmont, 720-438-2060.

Free Hip Hop Classes in December. 10 a.m.

Reverence Academy of Dance, 1370 Miners Drive, Suite 111, Lafayette, 303-661-9719.

Get Scared. 6 p.m. Marquis Theatre, 2009 Larimer St., Denver, 303-487-0111.

Handel’s Messiah. 7:30 p.m. Saint John’s Episcopal Cathedral, 1350 Washington St., Denver, 303-831-7115. Through Dec. 9.

CSED Week: Art of Data. 11:30 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

CSED Week: Capstone. 1 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

CSED Week: CodeFest. 10 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Denver Israeli Hanukkah Festival. 5:30 p.m.

Denver Jewish Day School, 2450 South Wabash St., Denver, 303-369-0663.

Frame by Frame. 7 p.m. Chautauqua Community House, 900 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-440-7666.

Gift. 1 p.m. and 7 p.m. Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826. More show times at thedairy.org.

Alex Snyder & Maya Bennett, Liv Phoenix. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

Celebrate! with the Boulder Children’s Chorale. 2 p.m. and 4 p.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-554-7692.

Free to BE: A Community Sound Healing Project. 3 p.m. Soul Tree Yoga Studio South, 1280 Centaur Village Drive, Lafayette, 303-859-3026.

Haydn’s Creation Mass. 10:30 a.m. First United Methodist Church, 1421 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-442-3770.

Khabu’s Magic Number Series. 7 p.m. Muse Performance Space, 200 E. South Boulder Road, Lafayette, 720-352-4327.

Boulder Weekly

events Mmmwhah Turns Two! / Special Creative Gathering. 2 p.m. Chuck Ceraso’s Gallery & Studio, 1294 Doric Drive, Lafayette.

Littlest Learners Class — with Bonne Nuit Baby. 9 a.m. WOW! Children’s Museum, 110 N. Harrison Ave., Lafayette, 303-604-2424.

Music in the Galleries: Laughing Hands. 1 p.m. Clyfford Still Museum, 1250 Bannock St., Denver, 720-354-4880.

Youth Maker Hangout. 4 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

The Music Of Bob Marley For Kids featuring Wake Up And Live. 11:30 a.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

Zak Sloan. 10:15 a.m. Lyons Fork, 450 Main St., Lyons, 303-823-5014.

Events Boulder Holiday Gift Festival. 11 a.m. YMCA, 2850 Mapleton Ave., Boulder, 720-272-7467.

Wednesday, December 12 Music Blues Night. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Open Mic Hosted by Silent Bear. 7 p.m. Tandoori Grill South, 619 S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-543-7339.

Rabblefish. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

Events

Midday Music Meditation. Noon. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Conversations in English. 10:30 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Reading Buddies. 4:30 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Cosmology and Modern Physics. 6 p.m.

Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Garry Winogrand: All Things Are Photographable. 4:30 p.m. Dairy Arts Center, Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Graphic Design Certificate Program. 9 a.m.

Boulder Digital Arts, 1600 Range St., Boulder, 303-800-4647.

STEAM Storytime. 10:15 a.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-4413100; 4 p.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-441-3120.

Wildlife. 7 p.m. Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Wobblers & Walkers. 9:15 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100; 10:15 a.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder.

BoulderReads Holiday Potluck. 2 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Creative Keychains. 2 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Family Holiday Gift Make and Take. 1 p.m.

Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-441-3100; 2 p.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-441-3120.

Monday, December 10 Music The Hang with Jessica Jones featuring Special Guests. 7:15 p.m. Cervantes’ Other Side, 2637 Welton St., Denver, 303-297-1772.

Jarrad Menard, Jason Brandt, Julian Davis.

8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-201-3731.

Middle Kids. 8 p.m. Larimer Lounge, 2721 Larimer St., Denver, 303-291-1007.

A Nashville Tribute Band Christmas Revival.

7:30 p.m. Vance Brand Civic Auditorium, 600 E. Mountain View Ave., Longmont, 303-651-0401.

Tis Better to Give and Receive Purchase a Hazel’s $50 gift card and receive a $10 card for yourself

Events Chess Club. 6:30 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Citizenship Classes. 6 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Movement Mondays. 7 p.m. Free Motion Dance Studio, 2126 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-379-8299.

Tin Ornaments @ Main. 4:30 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Younger Toddler Time. 9:15 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Not valid with any other offer. Offer valid December 7-12th.

In store only.

Limit 10 per person.

Not redeemable day of purchase.

See store for details.

Tuesday, December 11 Music 30th Anniversary Of Windham Hill’s Winter Solstice. 8 p.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

IL DIVO: Timeless Tour. 8 p.m. Bellco Theatre, 700 14th St., Denver, 303-228-8000.

Live eTown Radio Show Taping — with John Butler (solo) and Eliza Gilkyson. 7 p.m. eTown Hall, 1535 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-443-8696.

Thom Yorke. 8 p.m. Paramount Denver, 1621 Glenarm Place, Denver, 303-623-0106.

Events Calling All Math Wizards. 10 a.m. WOW! Children’s Museum, 110 N. Harrison Ave., Lafayette, 303-604-2424.

Conversations in English Tuesdays. 6 p.m.

Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

®

George Takei’s Allegiance. 7:30 p.m. Regal Denver Pavilions 15, 500 16th St., Denver, 844-462-7342.

Boulder Weekly

December 6 , 2018 37

I DO NOT OFFER YOU AN EASY WAY TO HEAL YOUR BODY. I DO OFFER YOU AN ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN WAY.

“Boulevard Saint-Denis” by Claude Monet via Wikimedia Commons

Charley Cropley, Naturopathic Doctor

303.442.6161 charleycropley.com

YOU DO IT FOR

FINANCIAL FREEDOM Career-focused degrees in Business.

Joseph, CA Graduate, Business Owner

Frostbite

by Elizabeth Robinson

Jamie got drunk on a cold night, slept outside, and didn’t protect his feet.

He limps into the shelter, leaning on chairs for support, sleeps on a bench, says the doctors say his feet can’t be saved.

We think toes at first, but in the delay, they say, the feet, no, the lower part of the legs will have to go. One morning, Jamie calls and asks if George has come in for lunch. “Where are you?” I ask. “I’m at The Broker. Medicaid is paying for a respite hotel for me.” Asks,

Before CollegeAmerica, Joseph worked as a delivery driver.

Today, he runs his own business.

Call (720) 613-3533 or visit CollegeAmerica.edu.

38 December 6, 2018

“Has George come in? Is George there? If you see him, tell him to call me. Tell George he can stay in the hotel room with me. He doesn’t need to sleep outside in the cold tonight.”

Elizabeth Robinson has published several collections of poetry and has taught at the Boulder Writers’ Studio, Naropa, CU Boulder and the Lighthouse in Denver. She is also a homeless navigator for Boulder Municipal Court.

Boulder Weekly

Table Mesa Laundromat In praise of the shared experience

‘Roma’ is a tour de force of cinematic storytelling by Michael J. Casey

T

he theatrical release of Roma is the cinematographic event of the year. Initially acquired by Netflix for their streaming ON THE BILL: Roma, free screening. 7 p.m. service, Roma’s visual and aural power Sunday, Dec. 9, proved too big for TVs, laptops, iPads International Film Series, and phones. Sure, subscribers will be able to Muenzinger Auditorium, University of Colorado stream the movie to their hearts’ content starting Boulder, 1905 Colorado Dec. 14 — pausing, rewinding and absorbing Ave., Boulder, internationevery last stunning frame — but Roma is an alfilmseries.com enveloping, engrossing experience; one that wraps you in its sumptuous and steady black-and-white images, in its patient and knowing reveals, and in its climactic tracking shot, where one family is united after another is, finally, let go. Everything in Roma is larger than life, and after a dual premiere at the Venice and Telluride Film Festivals this summer, it was clear: Roma demanded the big screen.

Breaking with Netflix’s tradition of only screening movies theatrically once they hit the website, Roma has slowly been rolled out in art-house theaters across the U.S. Now it’s Boulder’s turn; to skip it would be foolish.

Set in director Alfonso Cuarón’s hometown of Mexico City circa 1970, Roma follows Cleo (Yalitza Aparicio), a young Mixtec housekeeper caring for an upper-middle-class family in the Colonia Roma neighborhood. Life progresses with a day-in-day-out regularity: Father goes to work, Cleo takes care of the children and cooks, Father comes home. On her free days, Cleo hangs out with friends, goes to the movies, meets a boy, Toño Roma drains you then (Diego Cortina Autrey), and falls in love. Then fills you back up things shift. As Cleo sits in a hotel bedroom, Toño before sending you out into the world. shows off his chiseled physique and impressive bo skills. He explains that martial arts saved him from himself, and Cleo sits quietly and listens. In another movie, this might be the moment when true love starts to blossom, but above Cleo’s head is a painting of a turbulent sea, waves crashing against cliffs and a boat helplessly adrift.

There’s a storm brewing in Cleo’s world, too.

Rooted in Cuarón’s memories, Roma is a love letter to the woman who raised him and the city he called home. Using the ALEXA 65 — a digital camera that mimics 65mm film with surprising results — and utilizing a rich, incomparable soundscape, Cuarón deftly sets up this world and patiently watches as it falls into discord. When Father abandons his family for a mistress, wife Sofía (Marina de Tavira) must search for employment to support her three children and Cleo. And when Toño does the same to Cleo, Sofía and Cleo find themselves cast overboard without life jackets. But Cleo learns to swim, so to speak, and Sofía finds the family she’s had all along.

Like the best cinema tends to do, Roma first drains you then fills you back up before sending you out into the world. That is why Roma demands to be seen on the biggest screen possible, in the dark, with a community of strangers. Life is a shared experience; movies are no exception.

Boulder Weekly

Boulder’s Newest Laundry • New Machines • Wide Aisles • Plenty Of Seating • Drop Off Service • Free Wifi Open Monday - Sunday 8am to 9:30pm Located in the Table Mesa Shopping Center behind Lucky’s

695 South Broadway Boulder, CO

December 6, 2018 39

SI M P L E

|

L O C A L

|

FA R M

T O

TA B L E

BEST RESTAURANT THANK YOU for voting for us!

578 Br i ggs St re e t Er i e, C O 80516 303. 828. 1392 www.24carrotbistro.com

40 December 6 , 2018

BRUNCH

S AT & SU N 9 AM - 2 PM

L U N C H TUE-FRI 11AM-3PM

DINNER

TUE-THR 5PM-9PM

F R I & S AT 5PM-10PM

S U N D AY 5PM-9PM

Boulder Weekly

Four courses to try in and around Boulder County this week

menu THE TASTING

Saag Paneer Taco Roxie’s Tacos 1135 Broadway, Unit 102, Boulder, roxiestacos.com.

Photos by staff

T

Chips and Dip Euclid Hall Bar and Kitchen 1317 14th St., Denver, www.euclidhall.com

T

his isn’t your average plate of chips and dip. In the heart of Denver’s LoDo district, Euclid Hall Bar and Kitchen at Larimer Square specializes in eclectic and innovative pub fare including housemade sausages, poutine and schnitzel, in a made-to-share (have enough people? order the sausage platter) environment.

Fresh, lemon goat cheese (the dip) is covered by a stack of hand-cut potato chips and layers of both rare, smoked duck breast and duck confit. Surprising at first bite, the duck breast and cheese are served cold, juxtaposed to warm confit and potato chips. Sprigs of dill are more than a garnish, adding to the fresh taste. $12.50.

o create truly satisfying fusion cuisine, a wise chef understands not only what flavors pair well together, but where cultures intersect. Fletcher Starkey and Rushani Patel of Roxie’s Tacos have found the impossibly delicious crossroads of Mexican and Indian street foods. Enjoy one of three types of curry — Dada’s red chicken, saag paneer or chana masala — in either a taco, burrito, nachos or rice bowl. We opted for saag paneer tacos, with cubes of soft cheese sautéed in creamy yogurt sauce with baby spinach and roasted onion topped with cool, crisp kale slaw. Doused liberally with a homemade cilantro chutney, it makes you question why you didn’t eat curry with a tortilla sooner. $3.80.

Lunch Buffet Nepal’s Cafe 184 E. Elkhorn St., Estes Park

E

very once in a while that feeling comes along. You know, the one that goes like: “Shut up. I’m so hungry, I’m going to die, and I need food right now.” What we’ve noticed, as of late, is that some people are particularly prone to this feeling in Estes Park, as it serves as the gateway to myriad high-caloric activities, especially in the winter. Nepal’s Cafe is where you should go when that feeling hits. Its lunch buffet, which is an all-you-can-eat affair served up 11-3 p.m., is packed full of warming masalas, fresh-made naan, fluffed rice, spicy chicken, mushroom paneer, veggie noodle mixes and so much more. A delectably creamy rice pudding is available, with almond slivers and cinnamon, to top it all off. $12.

Spicy Red Ramen Chimera 2014 10th St., Boulder, chimera.restaurant

T

he composition of ramen can be as complex as it is variable, restaurant to restaurant. Chimera, for one, nails the delicate umami in its spicy red ramen. The artisan, organic, alkaline ramen noodles, which Chimera’s staff hand massage to create a unique texture, are perfectly chewy and equally flavorful. Its broth, too, is made from scratch, and provides a complementary base for the sansho-chili oil, grilled chicken, enoki mushrooms, sprouts, nori, corn and soft egg. Pair it with the duck dumplings and you’ve got yourself a meal to remember. $15.

Sunday - Thursday 11:00am-9:30pm / Friday - Saturday 11:00am-10:00pm / Happy Hour Menu (daily 4pm-6pm & all day Sunday!

2525 ARAPAHOE AVENUE, BOULDER, CO / 303-396-6365 Boulder Weekly

December 6 , 2018 41

TRADITIONAL VIETNAMESE PHO HOUSE • PHO • BOULDER PHO SOUP • GRILLED NOODLE BOWLS • GRILLED RICE PLATES • SALAD DISHES • HOUSE SPECIALTIES • VIETNAMESE WRAPS • WINE, BEERS & SAKE

Hours: Mon - Sun 10:30am-9pm 2855 28th Street, Boulder, CO 80301 • 303-449-0350 DINE IN - TAKE OUT • www.boulderpho.eat24hour.com

LIKE US ON FACEBOOK

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VOTED BOULDER’S BEST THAI

YEARS IN A ROW! 42 December 6 , 2018

LUNCH: Mon-Fri 11am-4pm DINNER: Mon-Fri 4-10pm Sat 12-10pm • Sun 5-10pm 1600 Broadway, Boulder 303-447-0273 • khow-thai.com

Boulder Weekly

Susan France

nibbles

BY JOHN LEHNDORFF

Chocolaterie Stam in Lafayette offers an array of chocolate and candy products, as well as coffee drinks.

It’s all relatives

Visiting local oases of chocolate, pastries, cheeses and food fun

Boulder Weekly

T

hey’re back.

We say that with complete affection and a sense of humor about the family members and friends who will be joining us in Colorado for the end-of-year holidays. I’m all in favor of it because visits inevitably lead to memorable tasting moments.

We say that we want to introduce folks to our finest culinary attractions, the local pleasure domes of flavor. Secretly, we are grateful because it gives us an excuse to indulge our cravings after a year of quinoa, kale, cricket loaf, keto coffee and paleo bread.

It’s just like living next to the mountains. Like a lot of folks, I see the Flatirons, foothills and snow-capped peaks on the way to work. I’m happy they are there but the reality of life is that I rarely get up there until somebody visits. see NIBBLES Page 44

December 6 , 2018 43

NIBBLES from Page 43

The same is true for food. As hosts we encourage guests to vacate our home for a few hours to gather stocking stuffers, Christmas brunch treats and foodie gifts... and hope they invite us along.

After a while everyone has already visited the usual suspects: Hammond’s Candies, McGuckin Hardware, Coors Brewery, Celestial Seasonings, the Boulder Dushanbe Teahouse, the Brown Palace Hotel, The Cruise Room and dining with the sharks at the Denver Aquarium. Some include Casa Bonita on this list; I don’t.

Here are some of the places I send folks... and myself. I’ll start with the newer Susan France places to discover for chocolate, pastries, cheese and a recommended good food time, than add in a few old favorites.

Immersed in chocolate: Like proverbial kids in a candy shop, everybody’s eyes widen as they are immersed in the cacao pleasures of Chocolaterie Stam on North Public Road in Lafayette.

An outlet for a small Midwestern chocolatier, the new shop has couches and tables and a piano in the corner. The counter offers hot chocolate, chocolate fudge sorbetto, praline and hazelnut bonbons, serious chocolate Santas, double salt licorice, stroopwafels layered with honey caramel, plus all manner of barks, slabs, bars and large gold coins that don’t come in a mesh bag (stamchocolate. com).

A patisserie moment: The recently opened Le French Café in Boulder is a comforting oasis of genuine chocolate croissants, baguettes, croques madames and crepes. For the holidays, the café offers the real deal: decorated buche de Noel in chocolate, coffee or praline. If you can’t wait, it’s available by the slice (lefrenchcafeboulder.com).

Let there be Babka: Rosenberg’s Kosher, the Denver bakery formerly known as The Bagel Store, stocks the traditional deli/bakery delights. The holidays

call for great bagels (everything!), bialys, challah, babka, seeded rye loaf, hammantasched, mandelbrot, rugelach, smoked whitefish and egg salad (rosenbergskosher. com).

John’s international bakery tour: Italian cookies, biscotti, pannetone at Dolce Sicilia Italian Bakery, Wheat Ridge (dolcesicilia.co). ... German/European stolen, kringle, streudel and springele at Arvada’s Rheinlander Bakery (rheinlanderbakery.com). ... Slavic poppy seed cake, Russian tea cookies, Hungarian cheesecake and sweet yeast buns at Arvada’s Royal Bakery (royalbakeryco.com). ...

Nordic Danish, kringle, strudel and great breads including Limpa rye with orange peel and fennel seeds at Lakewood’s Taste of Denmark (tasteofdenmark. net). ... Mexican orejas, cookies, cakes and breads (not to mention Christmas piñatas) at Panaderia Sabor A Mexico Bakery in Boulder.

Longmont, cheese Mecca: The headline of the feature at livability.com says it all: “This Town Is a Must-Visit for Cheese Lovers (Shocker: It’s Not in Wisconsin).” They start naturally with the Cheese Importers Warehouse (gift shop/ eatery), where you don a parka to shop and sample the fromagefilled shelves of the giant cooler of cheeses. Warm up with soup or raclette at the inhouse Bistrot des Artistes (cheeseimporters.com).

Across town is the must-visit Haystack Mountain Goat Dairy for a factory tour, tasting and cheese-acquisition opportunity. Don’t miss the aged queso de mano and soft-ripened peak (haystackgoatcheese.com). Next-door to the dairy is The Art of Cheese, a first-class teaching facility where family and friends can learn to make cheese at home. There’s even a Cheesemaking 101 class on Jan. 1, 2019 (theartofcheese.com).

Satisfying animal instincts: Guests who miss their pets have a couple of good destinations available. For

canine fans, Romero’s K-9/Dog Bar in Lafayette is the cat’s meow with spaces where dogs can sniff and play, and their guardians can sip craft beer and eat from food trucks (romerosk9club.com). If you are feline-oriented, I recommend a visit to the Denver Cat Company, a private club where you can sip coffee, eat snacks and hang out with a bevy of adoptable cats and calming kittens. Plus, feline yoga sessions (denvercatco.com).

Local food news

The words “frugal” and “Boulder” are rarely seen in the same travel feature, but when the New York Times’ Frugal Traveler recently visited, he enjoyed Louisville’s Moxie Bread Co. as well as Proto’s Pizza, Basta, Curry ‘N’ Kebob, Zoe Ma Ma and the Boulder Dushanbe Teahouse. ... The Gold Hill Inn serves dinner Friday through Sunday nights until Dec. 16. After a New Year’s Eve party the place hibernates until spring. ...

Boulder chef Matthew Jansen of Mateo Restaurant opens Raglin Market, 5378 Gunbarrel Center Court, on Dec. 7. The 40-seat, fast-casual eatery offers Mediterranean-accented soup, salads and sandwiches featuring local ingredients, plus cocktails and craft brew.

Shacked-up with food

The national Shake Shack chain will be opening an outlet soon at Twenty Ninth Street (in the former Cantina Laredo space). Meanwhile, Tip Top Savory Pies Pie Shack is set to open at 105 N. Public Road in Lafayette. They enter an already crowded field of local food-oriented shacks. The most notable are barbecue temple Wayne’s Smoke Shack (Superior), and the recently launched lobster roll purveyor, Maine Shack (Denver). Other destinations include Fat Shack (Boulder) and Mikey’s Wing Shack (Longmont).

Words to chew on

“Feeding your children is an act of great intimacy, and I received my rewards: the sounds of forks clattering on breakfast plates, toast popping out of the toaster.” — Bruce Springsteen John Lehndorff founded the Boulder-based Home for Unwanted Fruitcakes. Donations accepted. Comments: Nibbles@boulderweekly.com

Fall menu has arrived!! Happy hour pints still just $4 Book your next event at Redgarden. And enjoy our new beers on tap.

1700 Dogwood Street, Louisville, CO On the Northeast corner at the intersection of Cherry and Dogwood Monday 12p-6p, Tuesday – Wednesday 11a-9p, Thursday – Friday 11a-10p, Saturday 11a-9p, Sunday Closed redgardenbrewery.com (303) 927-6361 44 December 6 , 2018

Boulder Weekly

Welcome

TO GONDOLIER ITALIAN EATERY Where Going Out Feels Like Coming Home The Gondolier has played a big part of Boulder’s community history for over 50 years, and we want to make memories with Boulder County families for years to come.

Quality local ingredients Gluten-free Pizza & Pasta We Welcome Large Parties E N J OY

VISIT

The most inventive sushi in town and largest selection of Japanese whisky in Colorado.

Open Daily at 1 1 am Daily Happy Hour 3-6pm CONNECT

SPECIALS Our New Location!

1 1 36 Pearl St. Boulder

All Day & Night Happy Hour

JapangoRestaurant

Every Monday

Gondolier Longmont 1217 South Main St. • 720-442-0061

@JapangoSushi

1/2 off Bottles of Wine Every Wednesday Night

BoulderJapango.com

DJ’d Late Night Happy Hour

Gondolier Boulder 4800 Baseline Rd. • 303-443-5015

Every Friday & Saturday

110 YEAR ANNIVERSARY A LL INCLUSIVE NEW YEAR’S E VE GALA & ENTERTAINMENT

$

235

PER PERSON

COCKTAIL HOUR WITH PASSED HORS D’OEUVRES & A COMPLIMENTARY CHAMPAGNE COCKTAIL OPULENT DINNER & DESSERT BUFFETS & PRIVATE BAR ON THE MEZZANINE PARTY FAVORS

DANCE TO 110 YEARS OF MUSIC FAVORITES WITH THE MARK DIAMOND BAND

BALLOON DROP AT MIDNIGHT

CHAMPAGNE TOAST

TICKETS & MORE INFORMATION: BOULDERADO.COM/HAPPENINGS Boulder Weekly

December 6 , 2018 45

HAPPY HOUR Happy Hour M-F 3pm-6pm Sunday Happy Hour Drinks All Day WEEKLY EVENTS Tuesday 5pm–9pm Prime Rib Night 12oz. – $22, 8oz. – $15 comes with loaded baked potato or sweet potato with cinnamon maple butter and seasonal vegetable Wednesday 3pm–close $5 Burgers/$9 Beyond Meat Burgers (lettuce tomato, onion, cheddar cheese & LPH Burger sauce) Thursday Ladies Night $3 House Wines, $1 Off Drafts, $5 “Ladies Night” Cocktails Catch of the Day and Daily Specials Try our famous “Tail of the Whale” giant plank of Cod.

1111 Francis Street, Suite A, Longmont, CO 80501 • 303-647-3755

www.longmontpublichouse.com

Looking for the perfect gift for the sports fan in your life?

How about a gift card, t-shirt, or hoodie from their favorite spot, The Lazy Dog! This holiday season, for every $50 you spend, receive a gift card with 20% back for you to treat yourself!

Come. Sit. Stay.

1346 Pearl Street • Boulder, CO • 303-440-3355 • www.thelazydog.com Kitchen Hours: Monday – Thursday 11:30am - 8pm • Friday 11:30am - 10pm • Saturday 10am - 10pm • Sunday 10am - 8pm

46 December 6 , 2018

Boulder Weekly

drink New in brew: Bell’s Brewery & Brooklyn Brewery

Invasion of the legacy breweries

by Michael J. Casey

I

f shelf space at your liquor store wasn’t already crowded enough with Colorado craft galore, two out-of-staters have arrived, ready to vie for your hard-earned beer dollars. But the two in question aren’t just a couple of posers looking to get in on that sweet CO market; they are the real deal, a couple of O.G.s from craft beer’s early days. Boulder, please meet Bell’s Brewery from Michigan and Brooklyn Brewery from New York.

Named after founder Larry Bell, and initially known as The Kalamazoo Brewing Company, Bell’s Brewery opened as a homebrew shop in Kalamazoo, Michigan, in 1983. In 1985, they started producing beer, and in 2018, Bell’s finally found its way to Colorado shelves.

Their key label, Two Hearted Ale, is an American-style IPA made with 100 percent Centennial Courtesy of Bell’s Brewery hops. The availability of Two Hearted Ale is enough of a reason to welcome Bell’s to Colorado, as you will be hard-pressed to find a more consistent and balanced IPA. Incredibly aromatic with strong notes of pine, resin and earthy grass, and boasting loads of hoppy goodness in the mouth with a pleasing amount of bitterness, Two Hearted Ale is an IPA for IPA drinkers who miss the old days. Crystal clear in the glass with sticky lacing down the sides, Two Good news: Bell’s is now distributing in Hearted is a lovely reminder that not every IPA need Colorado, so go and be juicy, hazy or sweet. get yourself a Two Hearted Ale to see In addition to Two Hearted: Bell’s Porter, a dark what all the fuss is and robust ale perfect for cold nights; Lager of the about.

Lakes, a crisp and refreshing Bohemian Pilsner with just a touch of herbal hop bite; and Kalamazoo Stout, made with brewer’s licorice, can also be found in bottles and cans at your better liquor stores. Some are even on tap around town — what a fine time to be alive.

Though not quite as old as Bell’s, Brooklyn Brewery brings a bit of historical heft to the beer shelf. Started by Steve Hindy and Tom Potter in 1988, Brooklyn Brewery hired the nattily dressed Garrett Oliver as their brewmaster in 1994 and have reaped a great deal of success ever since. Especially in 2014, when Oliver won the James Beard Award for excellence in the category “Outstanding Wine, Beer or Spirits Professional.”

But an award does not a brewery make. For that you need beer — good beer — and Brooklyn does not disappoint. Their iconic hoppy amber lager, Brooklyn Lager, is a benchmark of the style: spicy and floral Cascade and Hallertau Mittelfrüh hops on the nose with a hint of malt sweetness that continues to the tongue. And with a pleasant snap of bitterness, Brooklyn Lager begs to be paired with roast chicken or savory cheeses.

Keep your eyes peeled, and you might also find Bel Air Sour: a crisp, tart, tropical ale that pairs nicely with a gaudy Acapulco shirt. Perfect to cut through those cold winter nights as a little bit of wishful drinking.

Boulder Weekly

December 6 , 2018 47

CHEESE IMPORTERS

Fromagerie & Bistrot des Artistes

Great Gifts of the Finest Foods & Imported Specialty Goods

DAILY ARRIVALS of NEW & BEAUTIFUL HOLIDAY PRODUCTS We have wonderfully unique and delicious gift baskets available for shipment anywhere in the continental US. Take the Headache out of shopping and let us deliver a fine food cheese basket as a gift for your Friends or Family.

Please order online at www.cheeseimporters.com, in person or over the telephone.

Wish someone a delicious

“MERRY CHRISTMAS!”

Skip a plane ride over the pond this holiday season and immerse yourself in “La Vie Parisienne” while experiencing a truly original European Marketplace right here in Colorado!

We offer more than 350 varieties of cheeses from around the world and the U.S. along with all of the gourmet foods and European goods that you have come to know us for • Relax & enjoy the finest meals and drinks in the Bistrot des Artistes and Belle Epoque Bar, serving breakfast and lunch all day.

FULL-SERVICE •DINNER MENU Fridays and Saturdays from 5 - 8pm.

• SPECIALS HAPPY HOUR 4 - 6pm Mon - Sat and All Day Sunday

48 December 6 , 2018

DAILY SAMPLING OF CHEESES & AN ENTHUSIASTIC STAFF TO HELP GUIDE YOU WITH YOUR GIFT SELECTIONS

Support your Community Shop & Buy LOCAL

CHEESE IMPORTERS 103 Main St., Longmont, CO Store Hours: Mon - Thurs 9am - 6pm Fri - Sat 9am - 8pm Sun 11am - 5pm

•

303-772-9599

cheeseimporters.com FOLLOW ON FACEBOOK FOR UPDATES AND SPECIAL EVENTS

Boulder Weekly

All photos courtesy of Raglin Market

community

TABLE

Mateo’s Matthew Jansen’s latest foray, Raglin Market, brings casual, elevated dining to Gunbarrel.

FAMILY TIES

After a lifetime of building relationships in Boulder’s food scene, Mateo’s Matthew Jansen opens a new restaurant in Gunbarrel

by Matt Cortina

Boulder Weekly

M

atthew Jansen knows a thing or two about the Boulder County food scene. He grew up in Boulder, learned to cook in Boulder restaurants, and has run one of Pearl Street’s longest-operating and most successful restaurants, Mateo, since 2001.

What he’s noticed, above all else, is change.

“We don’t have a lot of establishments that have been around for 20 or 30 years,” Jansen says, then adds, looking ahead, “It would take some really odd thought to figure out what’s going to really work moving forward in Boulder.”

But Jansen had one such odd thought recently — a lunch-focused restaurant in Boulder’s Gunbarrel enclave that brings the fine dining sensibilities of Pearl Street a little northeast. That idea materialized into Raglin Market, which opens Dec. 7.

It’s Jansen’s first foray outside of Mateo since he closed Radda Trattoria in Boulder about six years ago. He had decided that splitting time between two restaurants pulled him away too often from his family, especially his young son.

“Instead of having two restaurants and being ‘the parent always at the restaurant,’ I sold one and kept one but changed my schedule so I could be the best father and husband that I could be,” Jansen says. “My

son just started kindergarten this year so all of a sudden I have the time to dive into some new projects.”

The idea of family has always guided Jansen through his culinary career. A journalism major at the University of Colorado, Jansen fell in love with the communal atmosphere a kitchen and restaurant can provide while working at the long-gone and dearly beloved Laudisio.

“I kind of got to grow up in a family restaurant environment, and I really never left it,” Jansen says. “Antonio Laudisio would introduce us to great food and wine, and we would sit down and have a family meal at the end of the shift and everyone would talk about food and wine and where it came from and share great stories.”

Working at Laudisio also afforded Jansen the opportunity to travel to one of the restaurant’s partner wineries in Piedmonte, Italy, where he worked harvests, helped in the cellar, ate meals made by “grandma or one of the locals” and, ultimately, fell in love with wine. At 21, the experience was formative for Jansen, and he compounded that first-hand knowledge with a sommelier certificate from the Court of Master Sommeliers.

Jansen bounced around a few wellsee JANSEN Page 50

December 6 , 2018 49

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regarded restaurants in California and Las Vegas, including Michael Mina in San Francisco, until the opportunities back home in Boulder became too great to ignore.

“I was living in San Francisco and traveling back to Boulder,” Jansen says.

“A lot of friends and family said, ‘Hey why don’t you consider doing something here in Boulder?’ A lot of people that visited San Francisco and Los Angeles really loved the restaurants in those cities, and said we could use an additional restaurant similar to this or that in Boulder, and so I said, ‘Yeah, that’s probably true.’

“Growing up in Boulder, it was kind of fun to think about bringing something fun back to share with everybody, really, and just be part of a great restaurant community. It’s been really nice to watch it [grow] over the last 20 years.”

Jansen talks warmly about the restaurant landscape of the early 2000s — one that included Laudisio, of course, but also John’s Restaurant, Potter’s, Pearl’s, The Walrus Saloon and more.

The reward for launching Mateo back then, and making it thrive, is that Jansen is now able to see how deep its connection to the community runs.

“The restaurant community is really tight-knit, so the guys that own The Kitchen and Next Door and the team over at Frasca, a lot of those owners actually started at Mateo, which a lot of people don’t know,” Jansen says. “We still frequent each other’s restaurants and collaborate on quite a few events and now we all have similar ties to the community.”

Perhaps seeing the growth of people who have worked within the walls of Mateo, and the enterprises that those people have created, is why Jansen has an optimistic view about the future of Boulder’s food scene, and why he doesn’t lament the change Pearl Street, in particular, has undergone in the last two decades.

“The east end of Pearl, where we are,

was once, when we opened, you could say on the quiet side, and now there are all kinds of great businesses and food options all around us,” Jansen says.

The rapid rise of restaurants “has helped tremendously,” Jansen continues.

“There are a lot of opinions out there, but it’s a great food scene and community. ... Everyone’s loving the quality of restaurants, and shopping local, and supporting our local farms.”

But still, it’s Gunbarrel where Jansen has chosen to open Raglin Market, despite several available spaces near Mateo. In fact, Jansen wonders if he hadn’t launched Mateo before the wave of new development and restaurants in the early aughts, if he’d be able to make Mateo successful as a new restaurant today.

“It definitely would’ve been a totally different experience,” Jansen says.

“Looking at some of the new restaurants, the landscape of Boulder’s changed tremendously with new buildings and construction, and then we have to always take into account rents and the cost of doing business, it would be a different ball game today just in terms of the cost of entrance and factors like that.”

Gunbarrel, with a large transient population of workers who live outside the community, presented the best opportunity for Jansen to expand — the idea with Raglin Market is to bring casual fine dining like that available at Mateo into the lunchtime hour, and to make it available quickly so people can get back to work.

What’s going to make it successful, Jansen says, is, fittingly, the family of employees and customers he builds.

“I’m trying to surround myself with... I kind of call it the ‘dream team,’” Jansen says. “The team that we’ve assembled, they’ve been at several of the best restaurants around town and they make my life I wouldn’t say easy, but easier.”

What else is family for anyway?

Boulder Weekly

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ARIES

MARCH 21-APRIL 19: When I write a horoscope for

you, I focus on one or two questions because I don’t have room to cover every single aspect of your life. The theme I’ve chosen this time may seem a bit impractical, but if you take it to heart, I guarantee you it will have practical benefits. It comes from Italian author Umberto Eco. He wrote, “Perhaps the mission of those who love humanity is to make people laugh at the truth, to make truth laugh, because the only truth lies in learning to free ourselves from insane passion for the truth.” I swear to you, Aries, that if you laugh at the truth and make the truth laugh in the coming days, you will be guided to do all the right and necessary things.

TAURUS

APRIL 20-MAY 20: You have a cosmic mandate and a

poetic license to stir up far more erotic fantasies than usual.

It’ll be healthy for you to unleash many new thoughts about sexual experiments that would be fun to try and novel feelings you’d like to explore and people whose naked flesh you’d be interested to experience sliding and gliding against yours. But please note that the cosmic mandate and poetic license do not necessarily extend to you acting out your fantasies. The important thing is to let your imagination run wild. That will catalyze a psychic healing you didn’t even realize you needed.

GEMINI

MAY 21-JUNE 20: In my continuing efforts to help you

want what you need and need what you want, I’ve collected four wise quotes that address your looming opportunities.

1. “What are you willing to give up, in order to become who you really need to be?” —author Elizabeth Gilbert 2. “Leave the door open for the unknown, the door into the dark. That’s where the most important things come from.” —Rebecca Solnit 3. “You enter the extraordinary by way of the ordinary.” —Frederick Buechner 4. “Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.” —Nathaniel Hawthorne

Boulder Weekly

astrology

utes and four seconds, or 4.28 words per second. In one stretch, he crams in called on author Robert 97 words in 15 seconds, Heinlein to provide your achieving a pace of 6.5 horoscope. According to words per second. I susGo to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob my astrological analysis, his pect that in the coming Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES insights are exactly what weeks, you will also be and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. The audio you need to focus on right unusually adept at using horoscopes are also available by phone at now. “Do not confuse ‘duty’ words, although your forte 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700. with what other people will be potent profundity expect of you,” he wrote. rather than sheer speed.

“They are utterly different.

I encourage you to prepare by making a list of the situDuty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you ations where your enhanced powers of persuasion will be have assumed voluntarily. Paying that debt can entail anymost useful. thing from years of patient work to instant willingness to die. Difficult it may be, but the reward is self-respect. But SCORPIO there is no reward at all for doing what other people expect OCT. 23-NOV. 21: In May of 1883, the newly built of you, and to do so is not merely difficult, but impossible.”

Brooklyn Bridge opened for traffic. Spanning the East River to link Manhattan and Brooklyn, it was the longest LEO JULY 23-AUG. 22: What does “beauty” mean to you? suspension bridge in the world. But almost immediately people spread rumors that it was unstable. There was a What sights, sounds, images, qualities, thoughts and growing fear that it might even crumble and fall. That’s behavior do you regard as beautiful? Whatever your answers when charismatic showman P. T. Barnum stepped in. He might be to those questions right now, I suggest you expand arranged to march 21 elephants across the bridge. There and deepen your definitions in the coming weeks. You’re at was no collapse, and so the rumors quickly died. I regard a perfect pivot point to invite more gorgeous, lyrical grace the coming weeks as a time when you should take inspirainto your life; to seek out more elegance and charm and tion from Barnum. Provide proof that will dispel gossipy artistry; to cultivate more alluring, delightful magic. doubt. Drive away superstitious fear with dramatic gestures. Demonstrate how strong and viable your improveVIRGO ments really are.

AUG. 23-SEPT. 22: You know the expiration dates that appear on the labels of the prescription drugs you buy?

SAGITTARIUS They don’t mean that the drugs lose their potency after NOV. 22-DEC. 21: Robert Louis Stevenson published his that date. In fact, most drugs are still quite effective for at gothic novel Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde in 1886. least another ten years. Let’s use this fact as a metaphor for It was a bestseller, and quickly got turned into a theatrical a certain resource or influence in your life that you fear is production. In the ensuing 132 years, there have been well used up or defunct. I’m guessing it still has a lot to offer over a hundred further adaptations of the story into film and you, although you will have to shift your thinking in order stage productions. Here’s the funny thing about this influento make its reserves fully available. tial work: Stevenson wrote it fast. It took him three feverish days to get the gist of it, and just another six weeks to revise.

LIBRA Some biographers say he was high on drugs during the iniSEPT. 23-OCT. 22: Libran rapper Eminem is renowned tial burst, perhaps cocaine. I suspect you could also produce for his verbal skill. It may be best exemplified in his song some robust and interesting creation in the coming weeks, “Rap God,” in which he delivers 1,560 words in six minSagittarius — and you won’t even need cocaine to fuel you.

CANCER

JUNE 21-JULY 22: I’ve

CAPRICORN

DEC. 22-JAN. 19: A blogger on Tumblr named Ffsshh

composed a set of guidelines that I think will be apt and useful for you to draw on in the coming weeks. Please study these suggestions and adapt them for your healing process. “Draw stick figures. Sing off-key. Write bad poems. Sew ugly clothes. Run slowly. Flirt clumsily. Play video games on ‘easy.’ OK? You do not need to be good at something to enjoy it. Sometimes talent is overrated. Do things you like doing just because you like doing them.

It’s OK to suck.”

AQUARIUS

JAN. 20-FEB. 18: Aquarian athlete Michael Jordan is

the greatest basketball player who ever lived. He was also the first to become a billionaire. But when he was growing up, he didn’t foresee the glory that awaited him. For example, in high school he took a home economics class so as to acquire cooking abilities. Why? He imagined that as an adult he might have to prepare all of his own meals.

His ears were so huge and ungainly, he reasoned, that no woman would want to be his wife. So the bad news was that he suffered from a delusion. The good news was that because of his delusion, he learned a useful skill. I foresee a similar progression for you, Aquarius. Something you did that was motivated by misguided or irrelevant ideas may yield positive results.

PISCES

FEB. 19-MARCH 20: The Bible does not say that Mary Magdalene was a prostitute or even a “sinner.” There’s no mention of her sexual proclivities at all. Delusional ideas about her arose in the Middle Ages, instigated by priests who confused her with other women in the Bible. The truth is that the Bible names her as a key ally to Christ, and the crucial witness to his resurrection. Fortunately, a number of scholars and church leaders have in recent years been working to correct her reputation. I invite you to be motivated and inspired by this transformation as you take steps to adjust and polish your own image during the coming weeks. It’s time to get your public and private selves into closer alignment.

December 6 , 2018 55

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Boulder Weekly

Dear Dan: I’m a 59-year-old man in good health. For basically my whole adult life, I’ve had this problem during intercourse with a woman of (1) being very quick to come and (2) having a too-intense “cringey” sensation when I come. This has led to often going soft at the prospect of intercourse. This too-intense feeling makes me stop moving when I come, which is not satisfying at all. It doesn’t happen with hand jobs or oral sex — they feel fine and good. Is this a known phenomenon? And, most importantly, what can I do to get to a point where I can enjoy intercourse? This seriously messes up my enjoyment of sex and my confidence with women. One time, and only one time (out of many with a particular girlfriend), I had intercourse and it felt fine when I came, still thrusting, so I know it’s possible. I have been practicing with a Fleshlight, but it’s still painfully “cringey” when I come. It is not fun and rather depressing.

—He Always Really Dreads Penetration And Regrets This Dear HARDPART: I shared your letter with Dr. Ashley Winter, a urologist in private practice in Portland, Oregon, and the cohost of The Full Release, a sex, health and relationship podcast. Dr. Winter wanted to note that her comments are a general discussion of a medical topic and not individ-

Boulder Weekly

SAVAGE

by Dan Savage © Rachel Robinson ual medical advice. She wanted me to emphasize this point — which she also emphasizes at the top of her terrific podcast — because Dr. Winter is a responsible doctor and not a card-carrying member of the Amalgamated Advice Columnists of America.

(Membership in the AACA entitles advice columnists to say pretty much whatever they want.)

“There are three issues at play here,” said Dr. Winter. “First, the pain or ‘cringey’ sensation only associated with vaginal and Fleshlight penetration.

Second, being too quick to come. And third, erectile dysfunction.

HARDPART insightfully suggests his ED may be related to his performance anxiety as well as anticipated pain, and I would agree with this. I would add that his quick ejaculation is most likely also caused by a mix of ED and pain — the body adapts to pain and erection

Love

loss by letting the swimmers off the hook early.”

But why do you experience this pain only during penetrative sex? What is it about PIV (penis in vagina) or PIF (penis in Fleshlight) that causes those painfully cringey feelings?

“If he thrusts more during these activities than he does during oral or hand stimulation, I would expect that either pelvic floor muscle dysfunction or a nerve issue related to the lower spine could be causing the flairs,” said Dr. Winter. “If he were my patient, I would want to know if he has less pain when his partner is on top, which would mean his pelvis is moving less.

Also, does he have chronic low back pain? Bowel or bladder issues?”

Dr. Winter and I continued to generally discuss the medical topics raised by your question, HARDPART, and we generally discussed — this is not, again, individual medical advice, but a general discussion — two things someone with

your particular issue might want to think about doing. First, a guy with your problem could try taking Viagra — or a related drug — while also using a penis numbing spray. And a guy with your problem should also have his pelvic floor checked out. A urologist can help a guy with a problem like yours determine if there’s something wrong with the complex web of muscles and nerves that crowd together around your junk and, if it is a pelvic floor issue, refer him to a pelvic floor physical therapist.

Finally, a suggestion from me, the person with the AACA card: A guy with a problem like yours — a guy whose dick works a certain way and has worked that way for decades — could save himself the hassle of physical therapy and the side effects of Viagra by accepting his dick and the way his dick works. There are women out there who prefer oral and outercourse to PIV, HARDPART, and you could bed those women with confidence.

Follow Dr. Ashley Winter on Twitter @AshleyGWinter, and check out The Full Release podcast, which she cohosts with comedian Mo Mandel, at thefullreleasepod.com.

Send questions to mail@savagelove.net, follow @fakedansavage on Twitter and visit ITMFA.org.

December 6, 2018 57

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i, it’s me, your token East Coast Ashkenazi Jew friend.

My name doesn’t reflect how Jewish I am, but if you ever met my grandmother — the one who never reads anything I write as a form of revenge for not going to law school — you would get it. I’m agnostic and usually don’t call attention to the fact that I’m Jewish, but since anti-semitic hate crimes have increased by 37 percent in the U.S. since Trump took office, I like to remind all the crybaby white nationalists who actually controls the media. Just kidding, that was a joke — another thing we’re better at.

Anyways, we’re in the middle of the highest of holy holidays: Hanukkah, the Festival of Lights. Or Hanukah/Chanukah/ Chanukkah/Chanukka. To be clear, there is no right way to spell it because the English alphabet has different characters than the Hebrew alphabet, and the variety of spellings are just an attempt to represent what the word sounds like in Hebrew. For the purposes of consistency I’m spelling it one way and sticking to it.

Hanukkah dates back to two centuries before Christianity began, when the Greek-Syrians seized the Holy Temple and outlawed the practice of Judaism in Jerusalem. A group of Jews known as the Maccabees rebelled against the government and won, but when the time came to rededicate the Temple, they only had enough lamp oil to burn for one night. Miraculously it ended up staying lit for eight.

Today, we commemorate this ancient phenomenon with an eightnight party involving fried food, presents and the lighting of the menorah at sundown, which is just after 4:20 p.m. this time of year.

Yes, cannabis and Hanukkah go in hand in hand, in case you thought

Boulder Weekly

Adam Sandler was just joking when he sang about “smoking marijuanikah.”

My people have always been chill about weed, which is probably why there are so many comedians among us. I mean we literally have an eight-night party that celebrates the miracle of oil, making Hannukah parties the perfect time to get lit. It’s cold and dark out, you’re not allowed to work and you’re surrounded by traditional Jewish cuisine, which is mostly just fried potatoes and donuts. I cannot think of a more ideal time to be as high as possible.

A lot of people think Hanukkah is like “Jewish Christmas,” but it’s not. It’s better. Why? Because Christians exchange lame gifts like sweaters and candles while we give our loved ones what really matters: actual cash. Yes, one of the most traditional Hanukkah gifts is gelt, which is just Yiddish for money. So if you’re rich, you can thank your Bubbe for saving you a trip to the ATM on your way to the dispensary. If you’re not rich, you still get gelt, but it comes in the form of chocolate coins, so you can still thank your Bubbe for the munchy food.

Even though the Torrah doesn’t give us a direct blessing to smoke weed, the Jewish tradition of pikuach nefesh (means “saving a life”) says that preservation of human life overrides nearly any other religious consideration. So consuming cannabis is permitted during Shabbat and holidays if this is the most effective way to ensure one’s health, and if you come from a Jewish family, you know that it certainly is.

Is cannabis kosher? That’s not as clear cut as the no-pork or -shellfish rule. Weed doesn’t need a kushrat certification if you’re just smoking it. However, it’s an entirely different matter if you’re eating it. Cannabis is a plant just like any other fruit or vegetable, so if it were grown in Israel, to be consumable by Orthodox Jews, its growers would have to adhere to shnat shmita (meaning, allowing the land to rest every seventh year). But this is America, so shmita doesn’t apply to the pot grown here, making kosher approval unnecessary.

While leaving work early to get as stoned as possible and eat warm carbs for eight nights in a row sounds exhausting, my people are up for the challenge. So Happy Hanukkah to everyone in the tribe, including Drake. And Ilana Glazer. And especially Governor-elect Jared Polis, who will be the first Jewish governor of Colorado.

December 6, 2018 59

cannabis corner

by Paul Danish

For yuppies, pot is ceasing to be a guilty pleasure

A

ccording to a story in the Washington Post, yuppies have discovered marijuana, and pot has stopped being a guilty pleasure for them and become just a pleasure. The story quotes Emilia Montalvo, who had tried marijuana in high school, but left it behind after she started a family and a career in the Washington, D.C. area.

Three years ago, when the District legalized personal possession and use, marijuana started turning up everywhere, and Montalvo decided to try it again. “It’s getting more comfortable for me as I go out and see more people doing it,” she told the Post. “I don’t feel like I’m doing something wrong or illegal.” The Post also quoted The National Survey on Drug Use and Health as saying that as of 2017, the number of people older than 26 who occasionally used marijuana had increased by 3.2 million in three years.

• • • • Maybe more people don’t feel they’re doing something wrong or illegal by inhaling, but not all of the nation’s cops have gotten the memo. Earlier this fall the FBI reported that in 2017, 659,700 people were arrested for marijuanarelated violations, which is 21 percent higher than the total number of persons arrested for violent crimes in the same year. Of those arrested for pot crimes, just

over 90 percent were busted for possession. Total marijuana arrests in 2017 rose for the second straight year after having fallen for more than a decade. “Actions by law enforcement run counter to both public support and basic morality,” says Justin Strekal, political director for the National Organization to Reform Marijuana Laws, adding that it’s time “for lawmakers to end this senseless and cruel prohibition that ruins lives.”

• • • • Speaking of lawmakers and pot, the outgoing Congress pretty much stonewalled on marijuana reform, but it looks like it will legalize hemp before it adjourns. Hemp legalization has been pushed by Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Kentucky), whose state was a major hemp producer before reefer madness set in. Hemp legalization was included in the Senate version of the Agriculture bill, while the excretable House Rules Committee Chairman Pete Sessions (R-Texas) kept a companion bill in the House from being considered. Happily, the voters in his district kicked his sorry ass out of Congress last month, in no small part because of his stonewalling marijuana reform. Marijuana Moment reports that Rep. James Comer (R-Kentucky) is saying the Senate-House Conference committee considering the Ag bill has

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• • • • One congressman who is all-in on hemp legalization is Rep. Collin Peterson (D-Minnesota), who happens to be the incoming chairman of the House Agriculture Committee, who says he’s thinking about growing hemp on his farm after the Ag bill passes.

“I’m looking at it,” he told Minnesota Public Radio last Monday. “There’s a big market for this stuff that we’ve been ceding to Canada and other places.”

• • • • Yikes, there goes the neighborhood, but in a good way. A study published in the journal Contemporary Economic Policy found that in Denver the price of new homes within a quarter mile of a marijuana dispensary jumped 7.7 percent. The price of homes within half a mile of a dispensary rose 4.7 percent, but the price rise disappeared entirely for homes more than half a mile away. The study was done by Jesse Burkhardt, an assistant professor in the CSU Department of Agricultural and Resource Economics, and graduate student Matthew Flyr.

• • • • Speaking of studies, a new study published in an American Medical Association journal found that vaping marijuana can get you higher than smoking it. The researchers recruited 17 people who participated in six sessions, three where they smoked marijuana and three where they vaped it, after which they filled out questionnaires and had their blood analyzed. There were three concentrations of both the smokables and the vapables, 0mg, 10mg and 25mg. The researchers found that vaped pot “produced significantly greater subjective drug effects, cognitive and psychomotor impairment, and high blood THC concentrations than the same doses of smoked cannabis.”

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