BLAQUE/OUT MAGAZINE Aug. 2024

AUGUST 2024 ISSUE#047

EXCLUSIVE

INTERVIEWS ABI DARE’

AUTHOR OF, “AND SO I ROAR”

MARK FLETCHER CEO OF MANCHESTER PRIDE, ENGLAND

JAY AQUARIOUS

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARSHATHE MOTHER OF THE MOVEMENT ON HER 79TH

M A G A Z I N E

GET

INVOLVED

TAMARA S. LEIGH, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

CONTENTS BLAQUE/OUT MAGAZINE IS A MONTHLY DIGITAL PUBLICATION CENTERED FIRMLY IN BLACK & BROWN QUEER QULTURE. BLAQUE/OUT FEATURES WRITERS, ARTISTS, PHOTOGRAPHERS, CREATIVES AND INFLUENCERS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD. WE ARE WORDS. WE ARE ART. WE ARE FASHION. WE ARE CULTURE. WE ARE MUSIC. WE ARE PROTEST. WE ARE WHERE BLAQUE QUEER CULTURE LIVES. FIND US ON FACEBOOK, IG, TIKTOK. TO SUBSCRIBE TO BLAQUE MAGAZINE, VISIT: HTTPS://ISSUU.COM/STORE/PUBLISHERS/BLAQUEOUTMAG/ SUBSCRIBE

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INTERVIEW W/ MARK FLETCHER, CEO OF MANCHESTER PRIDE

WWW.ISSUU.COM/BLAQUEOUTMAG WWW.BLAQUEOUT.COM

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IN OUT NEWS BLAQUE/OUT WRITERS

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REAR-END REVELATIONS VICTORIA VON BLAQUE

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VIVID VOICES: JAY AQUARIOUS

BOOK THERAPY INTERVIEWS ABI DARE’

COVER ART: PHOTOGRAPHER: ZAIRE KNIGHT

RONI WINSTON

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PHOTOGRAPHIC EDITORIAL INSPIRED BY MARSHA P. JOHNSON

BY ZAIRE KNIGHT COPY EDITOR: RONI WINSTON ADVERTISING ACCOUNT MANAGER: DOREEN SCANLAN

03 AUGUST 2024 | ISSUE# 047

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FWHOSOEVER CHOOSES

a word

Well first & foremost, Happy 79th Birthday, Marsha P. Johnson. I talk & teach about Marsha often. But honestly when I think about her its usually as an abstract figure to represent all of the courageous Black Trans women who have mothered a nation. We won’t know their names, for many years most didn’t know hers but if not for them, there would be no us and there would be no Pride. She was not the first and certainly wouldn’t be the last but she became the face of the unseen and unheard. She birthed Pride and in many ways, birthed each one of us. Of every story I’ve heard and person I’ve talked to, Sylvia was the spitfire. She didn’t bite her tongue, took no prisoners and was with the shits to the extent that she could stand them. We need those fighters.

She inspires the hell out of me with that fight.

Marsha on the other hand was love personified. Loved flowers, loved to perform, loved colors and eye-catching outfits, loved her people but maybe most importantly, managed to love herself exactly as she was. And that may have been the biggest gift she gave us all. The honest to God truth is, outside of NYC before Stonewall 50, Marsha was barely acknowledged beyond community. She disappeared into the night and the police barely looked for her.

When they found her floating in the Hudson, they ruled her death a suicide.

Which everyone knew it was not. A victim of a vicious john, a homophobe, a serial killer, a predator, a crooked cop may have snuffed out her beautiful light but she wouldn’t have taken her own life after all that she had survived. Now there is talk that Marsha had a side you didn’t want to see due to her struggles with mental health. Maybe fact, maybe fiction, who of us doesn’t? But what Marsha left the world was a beautiful smile, the spirit of protection she cast over the girls that she, Sylvia & S.T.A.R. sheltered, a handful of iconic pictures, some scratchy old videos, a legacy of love and a trail of flowers. I wonder how tickled she’d be to see the posters and flyers and parties and statues that memorialize her now. The Mayor of Christopher Street has been forever crowned the Queen of a Movement.

Well here’s to you Marsha P. Johnson.

Happy Birthday!

Tamara Sanaa Leigh Editor-In-Chief

BlaqueOUT columnists & contributors Javannah J. Davis (she/her) resides in Rochester, NY where she has worked in healthcare for 19 years, is a self-published author, Founder/President of W.A.V.E Women Inc & CEO/Owner of Linjé Enterprises LLC. Javannah is passionate about healing, self-love, self actualization & helping others to live the best of their lives in a healthy way.

E.L. Winston of Fayetteville, NC (He,Him, His) Trans Community Advocate, CoFounder of Lambda Gamma Omega Nu Fraternity. Just your everyday introspective old man and 1 half of Team Winston

Ashanti S. Taylor-Alexander (she/her) is a life educated poet who believes in riding each wave of this world to the fullest. She is passionate about writing poems people can truly feel. Have a subject throw it at her and she'll make a master piece! Founder of Pulse Poetry Magazine.

Tina Marie Jones (she/her/hers) Founder of Uncover, LLC, mother of 4, activist, motivator, and columnist.

Lade Breez (He/Her/Them) is an award winning 3x published author, publisher, philanthropist, humanitarian, motivational speaker, life coach, event host, youth tutor, artist developer & spoken word artist. Owner & founder of Express Me Poetry Business Services & Events, & Educated Blessyns LLC, improving this world one stage at a time.

ExpressMePoetry.com

Roni Winston aka The Mrs. aka Pastor Roni (She/Her/Hers) Fayettevlle, NC. Minister, educator, entrepreneur, couples' coach, writer, mom, and grandma. Half . of Team Winston.

Immani Love, (she/her) A Lesbian Erotic Poet, Author, Ordained Minister, Freelance Writer, Real Estate Agent, and overall witty, seductress with the voice of a Siren. An educated Vixen in sunny St. Pete, Florida.

Mel Howard (he/him) Resides in Newport News, Virginia where he worked in finance industry for over 5years, is a columnists for BlaqueOUT Magazine and Founder/President of THRIVING TRANSMEN OF COLOR. Mel is passionate about community, self acceptance and forgiveness.

Courtney L (she/her) designer, developer, business owner, who loves to travel. When she is not doing that she loves to write poetry, a bit of a nerd, spend time with family and friends and help people learn technology. She lives in Los Angeles, with her dog.

Victoria Von Blaque, NYC (she/her/hers) A seductive, alluring, Black non-binary Trans femme. An Influential speaker on Equity, Inclusion, & LGBTQ competency. Author of Titty-Confessions.

y p p a H ! y a d h t r i B n o s n h o J . p a h s r a M , 1992 H T 6 Y L U 1945 - J , H T 4 2 .

G AU

IN OUT NEWS

Covering the news mainstream media doesn’t, because our stories matter

WHERE BLACK & BROWN QUEER CULTURE LIVES!

decision protects parent's rights by reserving deeply personal conversations to be had between parents and children without school districts and teachers getting involved in matters of family, medical and mental health decisions.

(July 16, 2024) - Yesterday, California Governor, Gavin Newsom made Cali the first state to bar school district policies that require staff to notify parents If their child requests a change in their gender identification at school. Under this ruling, schools and teachers will not be required to disclose their student's gender identity or sexual orientation without permission of the student.

Opponents argue that it will interfere with parents rights and could be dangerous to their children. Supporters argue that this will ease back the relentless attack on Trans kids and Trans rights as well as protect the safety of youth that come from unsupportive and anti-LGBTQ households for whom the disclosure could be deadly.

Newsome's office contends this

This after several California School Boards passed notification policies and the teachers union in one district entered into a battle with School Board to fight to not have to enforce it because it puts teachers in such an unfair position.

(July 19, 2024) - Baby news from Brittney & Cherelle Griner on Friday. Griner announced on "We Need To Talk" on CBS Sports that Baby Bash was born on July 8th, 2024 and weigh 7lbs, 8oz.

Congrats to the Griners!

(July 22, 2024) - Biden surprised the world yesterday by pulling out of the US Presidential race after much public and political outcry urging him to do so. He endorsed VicePresident Kamala Harris for the role and support from celebrities to the Clintons started pouring in. It doesn't take much to do better than Republicans on LGBTQ rights but where does the most likely Dem candidate and potential next United States President land on Queer & Trans rights? While her tenure as a District Attorney has landed her with less than stellar ratings in the race ratings, her position on LGBTQ rights has been much more favorable. She was the District Attorney in San Francisco which has a storied LGBTQ legacy. She joyfully performed Queer weddings when marriage equality passed, fought against the TransPanic defense and boasts a perfect 100 score on the Human Rights Campaign Congressional Scorecard.

THE OLD MAN'S CORNER E.L. WINSTON

There are not enough safe spaces in this country for us and the climate is not getting any better, if you haven't been paying attention. They hate us and the more they can push us back into closets and dark alleys or out and out unalive us they have been and will continue to do so. We have to continue to resist and continue to fight to create as many safe and affirming spaces as we can for ourselves. We must also demand our seats at the tables that belong to us.

As we start pointing out why these played out ideologies that don't serve

WE Belong Everywhere I’m the founder of a non-collegiate Greek lettered organization for Trans men and another org for masculine identified lesbains. This past month, I was reminded of why I created these organizations and why again we have to create safe spaces for ourselves.

Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. were rumored to be discussing and voting on banning Transgender men from joining their frat. The level of disrespect for those that are already members is beyond my comprehension. I don't really understand why we as a community continue to try to hold on to these socalled institutions of tradition that are rooted in misogyny and homophobia. While I respect anyone's desire to join this type of org and believe you should be afforded the right to do so, I think there needs to be a discussion about deconstructing the systems that these orgs have been built on.

the collective, we realize that we can not allow these organizations to not stand on their founding principles. We are moving into the era of accountability for everybody. If you say this what you stand for, then I’m gonna make you stand on it. I continue to find it crazy that people who share my melanin can not see that we are fighting the same fight. We are asking for what we as Black people have been fighting for since before any of us were born. To be discriminated against by people who look like me and should truly understand the struggle to be asking for the basics of human rights is unbelievable. We will not be excluded from the opportunities that should be afforded to everyone. Do an old man a favor and resist, make them stand on the principles they say they have!

SOUND THE ALARMS I'm tired t every day r a e h y m e h c ains that a p e h t f o d e ir T ent ways….. r e f if d e h t f o Tired ls empty e e f t s ju l u o s Man, my say.

“Go off” they ecause b e m t p m e t n't But please do I'm tired g Tired of tryin myself o t g in ly f o d ill be ok w u o y I'm tire d n a d step forwar r e h t o n a g in t is “ok” st keep mak a ju h y w a , s e m le p e o lg e u P y ind But if you ma honest Because to be I’m tired k I'm ok in h t 't n o d I ortantly self either r u o y But most imp y b t o n and probably n io it in f e d tlest things y t li e h By m t t a d e r and feve otions mean m e e Becoming hot s e h t f o w what half o n k y ll a e r 't I don th y body m This is my tru f o t u o d e k c is being su h t u o y y m e k d I feel li ing Days go by an What am I do ing it for? o d I m a o h w Better yet, S call.

O S y m is is h T Help me! of my lungs p o t e h t t a g ess screamin n k r a d f o it p In a rms Sound the ala

ASHANTI TAYLORALEXANDER

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Making History with Marsha P. Johnson How many of us can say we inspired a movement so much that there was an institute established in our name to defend the human rights of brown and black transgender people?

The Marsha P Johnson Institute (MPJI) was created as a result of the fearless, pioneering efforts of Marsha, who was one of the prominent figures in the Stonewall uprising of 1969. When I first heard Marsha’s story, it sent chills down my spine to see such a fearless level of ACTION during such an unpredictable time. Johnson fought tirelessly for gay liberation and was an activist of the truest kind. Not long after the 1992 pride parade, Marsha’s body was found in the Hudson River and the all-too familiar fight for justice began for a serious investigation into Marsha’s untimely death. To this day, the fight for justice in Marsha’s tragic passing spurs on but trust me when I say, there is so much to be learned from the story of Marsha’s life as well.

Pay It No Mind Johnson decided on the drag name ‘Marsha P. Johnson’ and proudly reminded everyone that the ‘P’ stood for ‘pay it no mind’ and would share this fact anytime questioned about gender. Never be afraid to set boundaries, especially where society tells you you shouldn’t. We decide what questions we want to answer, what discussions we are comfortable having and just who we share our stories with. I’m encouraged by Marsha’s tenacity & deliberate decision to draw a very clear line and never waiver. I can only imagine how many times people tested the theory and continued to prod even after being given a modest and respectful answer much like they do today. So what happens next? We take it up

a notch! My boundary line does not change because others want it to. One thing we know is that oppression is unnatural. It literally goes against every grain in our bodies for us to be treated less than human for any reason at all.

So DO NOT stand for this behavior. Don’t allow someone to make you uncomfortable or pester you for anything. And don’t ever be afraid to speak OUT. Life is literally what you make it and it is possible to limit trauma by accepting less of what doesn’t serve you. We know when someone wants to share a heartfelt discussion just like we can tell when someone is trying to antagonize. My life, my rules, my way...thank you Marsha!

Crown Your Damn Self Marsha was known for wearing crowns made of fresh flowers. As I research pictures from random moments in Marsha’s life, I keep seeing this pattern and I think of how Marsha’s teaching us a critical lesson here. Why wait for someone else to ‘crown’ you and acknowledge your accomplishments/worthiness? I know how hard it can be to feel ‘worthy’ but imagine how beautiful life would be if we all decided our worth for ourselves?

Many don’t know Marsha struggled with mental health issues, as a lot of us do. Being black or brown in this life presents a person with a unique set of challenges that not many others face or even understand looking in from the outside. So get the professional help you need but also remember not to be too hard on yourself. I have yet to look at a picture of Marsha P Johnson and see a mentally ill individual looking back. Marsha didn’t wear these stigmas and neither should we. Think of

it as your obstacle course being impossibly set and created for you to fail but you don’t...you get through it anyway. You will encounter effects that will go beyond your ability to reconcile with them all on your own but grace and patience is key here. Look yourself in the mirror, affirm that you’re doing the very best you can, then take a DEEP breath in...slowly breathing it out and finally, lacing your crown of flowers about your royal head. In this moment, we honor Marsha for reminding us to stop and smell the roses with which we crown our selves as we walk through fire!

We have to keep pushing forward no matter what lies ahead. We must always know inside of us that there’s truly nothing to be afraid of, especially if you’re convinced you’d rather live on your feet than die on your knees. We honor Marsha as well as all the other lives lost in this great battle for justice and equality on every level. And we will never stop!

Photo: Johnny Romanek (Source: brooklynmuseum.org)

MARK AN IMMANI LOVE INTERVIEW

CEO OF

MANCHESTER PRIDE, ENGLAND

FLETCHER

Immani Love of BlaqueOut Magazine sits down with the CEO of Manchester Pride, Mark Fletcher. In this candid interview, we discuss his appointment to the position, his experiences that led him to implement changes to the organization, and the exciting lineup for this year’s Manchester Pride Festival 2024. Immani shares some of her own images from her travels to Manchester, UK, in this important discussion about how the POC Queer community perceives Manchester Pride as a safe place to celebrate. It is an exciting exchange.

h t 0 0 1 y p y p a a H irthd B

“PLEASE TRY TO REMEMBER THAT WHAT THEY BELIEVE, AS WELL AS WHAT THEY DO AND CAUSE YOU TO ENDURE DOES NOT TESTIFY TO YOUR INFERIORITY BUT TO THEIR INHUMANITY.”

N I W D L A B JAMES

The 1st Pride Was A

RIOT A Photographic editorial Inspired

by Marsha P. Johnson -Zaire knight 2024

AN EDITORIAL FROM THIS MONTH’S COVER PHOTOGRAPHER, ZAIRE KING & HIS MODEL, EDEN @ THE STONEWALL INN, NYC Eden: We had been taking photos for a little over an hour and because I am currently disabled I asked if we could take a break and sit. While looking for a seat, I suggested Stonewall. As a Black Trans woman, I assumed it would be a safe space for me. We sit and less than 2 minutes later a waiter named Val (we presume, she later would refuse to give her name) approaches us and asks if she can get us anything. I worked in the restaurant industry, so while I felt a bit rushed, maybe she just realllly didn’t want us to feel ignored. I asked her if we could get the menu (she hadn’t given us one). Not a minute after receiving the menu and she’s already hovering over us asking if we’ve made a decision.

Now, I feel rushed. And because I can sense Val is going to keep hounding us, I ask for water just to get her off our back and it’s hot out. She responds with “𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 water” in a dissatisfied tone. And I answer: “yes 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 water.” She says “of course” (with a hint of sarcasm and I believe an eye roll) but she’s off and brings back the water in less than 30 seconds. She asks again “can I get you guys something?”

I say “we’re still deciding” and she says, “you’ve been ‘deciding’ for a while.”

First, no we haven’t; just-to remind you, it’s been less than 5 minutes overall since we’ve actually had the menu. And second, in her sentence I hear almost an accusatory tone, like she assumes we’re loitering at this restaurant. I responded with “I’m sorry I didn’t know we were in a rush.”

She storms off muttering under her breath and this triggers me because #1: nobody has ever said anything positive in a mutter and #2: because the waiter is a white woman and I’m a Black Trans woman at best she was calling me a b*tch and at worst a cavalcade of slurs. I look at Zay, the photographer, and say, “surely, it’s not that serious.”

Val hits a 180 and practically runs over to say “actually it’s that serious when it’s my job” matter-of-factly. And I simply respond “so do it.” She says,

“no need to be rude” and before we both devolve into a petty back and forth, she storms off again and Zay goes to talk to her. Zay comes out with Val not far behind and she inches closer and closer in my peripheral just to say “if you felt like I offended you, I’m sorry” in the way a child who wasn’t really sorry would apologize. And then we left.

Zaire: What happened when I went to go talk to her: Val was walking into the restaurant and Eden had left to dispose of something while I decided to try and get the name of the waitress and express our grievances with her poor service. She suddenly became busy as if avoiding me and had me trail her in and out of the restaurant trying to have this conversation she was pretending she wanted to have. She said let’s talk at some point again and then began walking towards the bar area where I followed her. There were two people behind the bar counter. There was a red carpet rope but it wasn't closed off, so I followed her, then she spun around and raised her voice saying, “You can’t be back here!” She had her hands raised like she had no idea where I came from when she had literally led me there. I took a big step back and explained that I was a photographer for BlaqueOut Magazine which was why I was here photographing in honor of Marsha P. Johnson. And then I proceeded to say, “You came off very aggressive and I just wanted to communicate that and I wanted to get your name so I could write a review of this experience. Then she refused saying, “What’s a name? I’m a human being, you’re a human being. I’m just being an adult and trying to communicate.

I wasn’t rude to you..” She was still being dismissive as hell. A man yelled out to her “ Hey Val! You okay?” from the bar and I said, “You know what, we clearly aren’t going to come to an understanding about this situation and I’m going to leave now.”

Later…

We later returned to Stonewall to take more photos once our group had grown larger. When we returned, the waitress, Val, was there and started walking up to me trying to talk while we took photos. It was really uncomfortable how desperate she was to make amends, but eventually I relented. After reframing in my mind how I could use her labor to include myself in the photos. You know the old, ‘who takes pictures of the photographer story,’ well Val kept asking, “ Are we cool?” & I kept staring at her awkwardly.

From Blaque/OUT Editor, Tamara Leigh As a native New-Yorker who has transplanted to Florida, I always caution people in NY about acting superior in terms of the evolution of Queer and specifically Trans justice. I don’t want any of us to get lackadaisical or delusional about how far there really is to go in the work of Queer rights. But I mostly don’t want OTHER people to think they’ve done “enough work” and feel that at this point we should be satisfied. To be from and have spent my life in arguably one of the “free-est” states and now is building a life and career in arguable one of the least free states, I can tell you with absolute certainty that the battle isn’t a northern one, a southern one, a city one or a hood one or a country one or a suburban one. It isn’t a Republican problem or Democrat problem and it is not a Black problem or a White problem.

When your identity is Intersectional- its just an even bigger more oppressive series of problems. Homophobia and Transmisia ESPECIALLY when coupled with racism is a United States problem, a global problem and one that still has a very very long way to go. I wasn’t there when this happened but I do trust my team to the end of the earth. And I don’t know what type of day Val had, because customer service does indeed suck. But I do know the very last place anyone should even THINK they are experiencing Transmisia, homophobia or racism is the Stonewall Inn. But I can also tell you that it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest. The magazine will be reaching out to the Inn to give them an opportunity to respond and make it right. But these folks deserved the opportunity to tell their story without input because what they felt they experienced, IS what they experienced.

The End. We sincerely hope next time based on customer service, based on context, based on best business practice and based on history that isn’t an experience anyone else will have there. This no longer 1969. See cover.

-T. Leigh

My name is Zaire Knight. I am a Multimedia Artist. I create work ranging from digital photography, painting, digital painting, collage, graphic design, graffiti art, etc. I also make music and write poetry and lyrics. I’ve always loved to create and was kept in art education programs since I was a toddler, which was when I was first acknowledged as an artist by a man in my church, David Macdonald. A Syracuse University Art Professor.

He was attending my church one Sunday at the request of his late wife, where I was sitting in the pews avoiding being popped by my great grandmother for drawing on the church pamphlets. I saw his thick Locs and knew I wanted to draw every single one. As I was sneaking to draw this man I had never noticed, he snuck up on me and peaked over my shoulder in awe. He took me to my mother and asked if she had ever seen me draw stick figures, and I hadn't. I had always tried my best to draw what I saw. From that day forward he recommended art programs for me to my mother and told her I would attend Syracuse University one day.

I attended Syracuse University for my BFA and went on to participate as a speaker and co creator in multiple documentaries and interviews about my art and contributing to other professors and well known artists' works throughout my career. Writing and illustrating for different magazines, creating murals, photographing events, and for brands. I am now pursuing my Masters in Arts Education and plan to go after my PHD after and become a Professor.

Websites: Z-Nation (dreambiggerthanyourfears.com) IG: znation_dream_bigger models: Ariel, Eden, Bunny Pyrra

Join us in honoring our friend & master stylist’s memory by donating unused hair from your last style to “The Crown Collective” who distributes hair to women & girls in need.

L B B T L A U N N A T 1S

s e m l o H a i k e S E V I R D N O I T A N DO

IR A H Y C A LEG

5551 S 78TH ST, TAMPA, FL 33619

We Are Collecting: New Braiding Hair of all colors & textures Brushes & Combs Hair Accessories Gel etc.

August 3rd 4 - 7PM

$TBBLACKLESBIANS

BOOK therapy B O O K

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And So I Roar by Abi Daré, I think extracted every emotion you can think of. I laughed, I cried and I was furious all the way through. This book continues the story of Adunni from The Girl with the Louding Voice and if you loved that novel, you’ll definitely love this one. If you haven’t read the first novel though, it still stands alone because you get enough of the backstory to know what’s happening. Mrs. Daré continues to give us insight to the treatment of women and young girls in Nigeria. She shows how the voice of one person can spark the voices of many. You get to meet a group of young girls and your heart can't help but to love them and become invested in their separate stories. You get pulled into crying and laughing with them as well rooting for them.

The themes of strength and sisterhood, resilience, forgiveness and the pain of holding on to the past are ever present. We get to look more into Tia’s story. She is the woman who saved Adunni from the home of an abuser.

We get to see Tia’s complex relationship with her mother and how that plays into why she goes so hard for Adunni.

You are also welcomed into the complex relationship between Tia and her husband, Ken. It highlights the heaviness of a relationship when there are unspoken secrets. Then, there is the power of misogyny and its devastating consequences to Black women. Daré manages to speak to the lives of her characters who could be your brothers and sisters, but she leaves nothing untouched. I love that the novel touches on climate change and the damage it’s doing in Africa. It is an issue that is happening all over the world and if we dont fix it soon there will be no planet to speak of.

This novel explores some heavy subject matter and if you're triggered by themes such as domestic violence, child abuse and child rape, assault, murder and suicide, then you may want to skip by this one. It is so eloquently presented though, it also makes you want to be a voice in the world. This novel touches forgiveness of others and yourself and what that looks like when you're reluctant to do so. It empowers you though to take the step.

This book truly touched my soul in such away that was refreshing and disturbing. I found myself wanting to have that childlike way of looking at situations like Adunni and disturbed by the mistreatment of these girls and women.

The black woman is the most unprotected and disrespected person on the planet and it’s about time we start protecting our Queens! Do me and yourself a favor and grab this book. You need to hear the stories. Release date is this week on August 6th. Get your copy!

book therapy

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D A R E ’ continues the protagonist’s story from her debut novel and gives additional depth by intertwining it with the voices of other young women in her latest novel, And So I Roar.

The following is my interview with Abi Daré. I got to know her, her storytelling, and her meanings.

EW: How did you know you wanted to be a writer? Do you have a favourite writer or a favourite story that inspired you?

AD: I discovered my passion for writing through my love of storytelling, which began when I was in primary school and was enrolled in drama club. Later as I read the Famous Five novels during my teenage hood, I loved being transported into the worlds created by the authors and living vicariously through the characters. Those early days were pivotal in shaping my desire to become a writer.

Privileges have come with my latest venture and this is one of them. An opportunity to interview a New York Times bestselling author is exciting and dynamic for your favorite dyslexic book nerd. Abi Daré came out with a debut novel that brought the rich and storied Nigerian culture into the homes of those who have never left their city. She weaved a tale of profound individualism and strength. It was a story that empowered a girl’s voice to speak across languages, cultures, and continents. Now, Daré has done it again. Her second novel

EW: What is your writing process? Tell us what you do to prepare yourself. What is your favourite spot? Do you have a favourite writing instrument or music, etc.?

AD: My writing process is a blend of structure and spontaneity, shaped by rituals that help me immerse deeply into the creative flow. Before diving into writing, I often spend time getting to know my characters (who are they, and what do they want?) before researching and outlining my ideas. This helps me establish a foundation from which to build the narrative. I often sit in a local café to write. I love being surrounded by the chatter of other humans and the smell of coffee. I don’t listen to music.

might have included conflicts and misunderstandings typical of adolescence. The stunted relationship deprives her of guidance and emotional support during crucial formative yearsa role she inadvertently looks to Ms. Tia to fulfil.

This loss also intensifies her determination to honour her mother's dream of getting an education.

EW: With all of the experiences Adunni has had, she still seems to maintain a bit of innocence. Why was it significant for her to have this?

AD: Maintaining a bit of innocence is a deliberate act, first to remind myself that Adunni is still a child(and to separate author from character).

Children are often resilient: resiliently forgiving and hopeful. As an adult writing in the voice of a 14-year-old, I had to find a way to make my character dream and aspire for a better future, even when confronted with harsh realities (I wouldn’t be so hopeful or trusting!). Adunni's unwavering belief in the ultimate good is a universal quality of youth: curiosity, hope, and the belief in a better tomorrow.

EW: Adunni’s father (the man she grew up with as father) exposes the more vulnerable part of himself before his death, how does this stand up against the inability for Adunni or Tia to hear that same type of confession from their mothers directly before they each die? Which do you think is more impactful and why?

AD: It is hard to decide. The circumstances Adunni and Tia face with their parents shape their emotional landscapes in different ways. Adunni's father's vulnerability before his death provides a moment of clarity and emotional connection. It allows Adunni to see a different, more human side of her father (after all, he is human!) and perhaps allows me, as the author, to show that he has had a year to reflect on how he treated his daughter and to try to make things right. This moment of openness stands in stark contrast to the unresolved and complex feelings both Adunni and Tia experience due to their mothers' deaths without such direct confessions.

The lack of closure from their mothers' deaths leaves Tia with lingering questions and a sense of incompleteness in their relationship. For her, it means navigating her own identity and struggles without ever fully understanding her mother's perspective—this is something I can relate to with my father’s death after many years of separation.

For Adunni, her mother's absence creates a void filled with idealization and longing.

EW: Did you have any hesitation about incorporating the poverty that you write about considering how little some Westerners are exposed to the wealth and/or success of any nations on the African continent? Does this influence your writing at all? How? AD: I am acutely aware of the challenges and misconceptions that often accompany narratives about Africa, especially those centred on poverty.

I grapple with the concern that Western readers might see the story as a one-dimensional portrayal of Nigeria, overlooking the rich diversity and vibrancy of the country. However, in both books, I also show the wealth and comfort of families—in some cases, extreme wealth. My commitment to authenticity and truth-telling ultimately enabled me to tell a story that reflects the harsh realities faced by many.

EW: And So I Roar, Iya is so important to the movement of the story, but her life is spent so much in pain, and she refuses to die burdened with Idowu’s story. How do you relieve yourself of emotional burdens? Life can be heavy, so how do you handle your self-care?

AD: Crafting stories with authenticity requires me to delve into experiences, which often left me feeling emotionally drained. To manage this, I turned to several practices that helped me find balance and relief. I find solace in prayer, in laughter (I try to make at least one character witty), and I pretend to exercise (I try, but it’s so darn difficult to maintain an exercise routine!). I like to reward myself after a good writing day by taking myself out to eat (I love food and hate exercise- someone please help me!). I also make it a point to surround myself with friends and family

EW: Writers are thought to so often write from what they know. Do you infuse people you know in our favourite characters from your stories? Any you would like to share with us?

AD: I don’t often tell writers to write what you know, I tell them to write what their heart wants to write, the story that grips them and won’t let go until it is told. I tell them to write that story with respect, empathy and passion.

My characters are often not a direct translation of any one person. Instead, it's a blending of various traits, experiences, and stories that collectively create a rich, authentic portrayal of the characters in my book. Many of the characters I write are inspired by real-life observations and stories. Adunni is a composite of many strong, resilient young girls who served as housemaids around my childhood home. Ms. Tia is inspired by the women who navigate the complex balance between modernity and tradition. Her story reflects the experiences of many Nigerian women who juggle professional aspirations with societal expectations.

EW: Your story is steeped in Nigerian culture, why do you think this story speaks to the heart of readers in other cultures?

AD: I was conscious of exploring themes with universal appeal while grounding the story in Nigerian culture. This approach, I hope, allows the book to resonate with readers from various backgrounds. The journey of self-discovery and empowerment is a universal human experience, and I hope readers from different cultures can relate to the struggle of overcoming personal and societal obstacles to assert one's identity and purpose. I address issues of social justice and gender inequality, with characters confronting these challenges in ways specific to their cultural context. Yet, the underlying fight for dignity and equality, as well as the emotional journey and connection with the characters' experiences, allows readers everywhere to empathize and understand.

EW: Your writing transitions so smoothly between characters being gifted English

speakers and English language learners. Why is it important to represent both types of characters? Also, what is your background for representing both of these types of speech?

AD: Growing up in Nigeria, I witnessed the daily challenges and triumphs of people learning and using English (the official Nigerian language) alongside their native languages. I also conduct research and engage with individuals from various linguistic backgrounds to ensure my portrayals are accurate and nuanced so as to honour the cultural richness and linguistic diversity of Nigeria. And because I believe that the ability to speak good English is not the sole measure of intelligence and worth, and that every voice is valuable regardless of language proficiency, I try to reflect this in my writing.

EW: When you wrote The Girl with the Louding Voice did you know that Adunni’s story was going to continue? If so, what drove you to continue her story? If not, what changed your mind?

AD: Not initially. Adunni's determination, resilience, and quest for education are not isolated experiences; they represent the struggles and aspirations of many girls around the world. This universal need for their voices to be heard inspired me to continue her story. Additionally, my mother, who insisted on a sequel (including Adunni’s 20year plan for conquering the world), played a significant role.

EW: Mother-daughter relationships are often so complex. Tia and her mother represent that, but do you think that Adunni initially thinks so much of her mother because they did not get to develop into that difficult stage as Adunni was maturing? How does this stunted relationship initially impact her emotionally/psychologically?

AD: Adunni initially idealizes her mother because their relationship was tragically cut short before they could experience the complexities that often arise as children mature. This idealization stems from the lack of time to develop into the more challenging stages of their relationship, which

who bring joy into my life. Writing is therapeutic too! It helps me to process and understand life in strange ways! To channel heavy emotions into something meaningful.

EW: What do you feel is the greatest lesson we can learn from the girls in the Ikati forest from the beginning of their interactions to the moment they come out to be judged?

AD: These girls demonstrate the power and importance of unity and sisterhood (we should all lean into each other for support), of incredible resilience as they undergo a process of selfdiscovery. I hope we learn the power of speaking with a collective voice against injustice.

EW: If you could select one sentence from the novel that you feel represents a theme from the novel, what would it be?

AD: There are too many!

EW: Tia and Adunni's mother experience a deep first love with neither coming to fruition.

They each find some peace in their own way; do you think that societal expectations require this more of women than men? Specifically, because you write about Nigerian culture, who do you think would be the most important players in shifting this cultural change and how?

AD: In many cultures women often face heightened pressures to conform to societal norms regarding love, marriage, and familial roles. These expectations can limit their personal freedom and the pursuit of individual happiness. Shifting cultural expectations requires a concerted effort from various sectors of society. In Nigerian culture, as in many others, the combined influence of educators, families, policymakers, media, and advocacy groups continue to play a crucial role in challenging and changing the norms that restrict women's lives.

EW: Would you argue that Tia’s father’s discovery that his decision to have his wife stop her career when they had a child is more hurtful to his pride or more painful about not knowing what his wife needed?

AD: The pain of not understanding what his wife truly needed, underscores a deeper failure in their relationship—his inability to communicate effectively with his wife and recognize her desires and ambitions. This discovery makes him feel like a failure, the inability to realise the gaping emotional distance that resulted from not valuing his wife’s aspirations.

EW: You bring in mental health services for those traumatized in the story, why was this so necessary for you? Why do you think culturally it is such a difficult topic?

AD: The reluctance to openly discuss mental health is often rooted in traditional beliefs, fear of social judgement, and a lack of awareness about mental health issues and treatments. However, with the advent of social media, this perception is gradually evolving. In my narrative, it was crucial to emphasize the importance of mental health services because trauma—from environmental disasters to personal losses and societal pressures —profoundly impacts individuals' mental and emotional well-being. Ignoring or suppressing these issues can perpetuate cycles of suffering and hinder healing and resilience. Through portraying characters accessing mental health support, my goal was to normalize seeking help and underscore its critical role in healing and rebuilding lives.

EW: Is Adunni’s story finished, or do you feel that she has more to say?

AD: Adunni has her own way of surprising me, so I’d say let’s wait and see.

EW: How can our readers find you (social media)?

AD: @abidare_author (on Instagram and on threads) EW: Any final thoughts you’d like to share?

AD: Thank you for this wonderful opportunity!

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JAYAQUARIOUS

Meet Jay Aquarious, a Black queer singer and songwriter from Buffalo, NY, who's really making waves in the music scene all around western New York. Jay mixes up touching songs and real stories creating music that really hits home and performances that are full of energy. Jay's work is pushing boundaries and leading the way for new ideas in music. In this interview, we dive into their inspiring story, check out their creative process, and celebrate the impact Jay is having on the music world.

My fellow adventurous souls, lend me your attention. As someone who embraces my queerness and indulges in various kinks and pleasures, I hold no judgment and have few limits. As long as it involves consenting adults, I believe in exploring and enjoying oneself. When it comes to life, especially sex, I take a holistic approach.

Now, let's talk about boundaries when it comes to anal sex. Although I lean towards being a bottom about 90% of the time, I'm well aware of the ins and outs of topping. Sometimes, just like using Google Maps, you may encounter unexpected obstacles on the journey, like rocky mountains or mudslides. But hey, when you really like someone, you roll with the punches because "shit happens," right? Speaking of which, if someone claims it's their first time and there's absolutely nothing happening back there, it raises an eyebrow. Something doesn't quite add up.

So, my question to you is, what's your breaking point? Is it a little water, a full-blown painting, mucus, blood, or are you the type who can power through anything? Do you embrace your partner, providing reassurance and aftercare, allowing them to clean up before continuing the fun? I'm genuinely curious because, for one of my

regulars, I've seen him countless times without any issues. I always make sure I'm ready, so I prepared myself before his arrival. Yet, after our passionate encounter, he seemed bothered by the fact that the outcome wasn't pure white, but slightly cream-colored. I inquired if there was an issue during his own cleaning process, to which he said no. So, I explained that this wasn't fecal matter, considering the extensive preparation I had done. I reminded him that, even though it was a new experience for us, it was a possibility.

As we delve into the mystery of why he's being so stingy with his weapon of mass destruction, the news of 45 rudely interrupted our conversation. Surprisingly, he was so turned off by the situation that he abruptly ended our time together and dropped me off. Personally, I feel his reaction was quite strong, especially considering I hadn't even reached my own climax. Keeping in mind that this person identifies as a cisgender heterosexual man, I’m curious about your thoughts….

TiTTY Victoria Von Blaque CONFESSIONS

Nicole

Levy

as Marsha P. Johnson Nicole sat down for our interview to reflect on her thoughts of Marsha’s influence as well as her personal experiences. Nicole has journeyed in her 40+ years as a force to be reckoned with. She has had the foundation of her diverse family (who taught her to be proud of who she is), the support of her loving fiance, and the embrace of her faith to motivate her. Nicole is unapologetically herself. Check out our conversation and the nuggets Ms. Nicole has to share.

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LOVE LIVES IN US...

The Winstons WINSTON AND THE MRS. (E.L. AND RONI)

Love lives in us…the Winstons and we want to share a little bit of it with you. There is a trend today of teaching us how to say ‘no’ and that is such a profound thing. Two little letters can have so much power over our lives. The purpose being that we protect our own peace and sanity. We can’t be everything to everyone, so the word ‘no’ creates space for our self care. In our intimate relationships though, ‘no' can feel like rejection. What does ‘no’ look like without losing the love?

The Mrs. I personally struggled with saying ‘no’ in my past. I want people to feel loved, so it was difficult for me to say ‘no’. I’m a hustler as well and I just want to get the work done, so I struggled with saying ‘no’ to tasks at work and in the community. These struggles left me often feeling overwhelmed, defeated, and exhausted. Winston taught me to avoid these pitfalls.

Now, I have no trouble with it. If anyone asks me for my time, energy, or effort for something, I do a self check-in. I check to see if I have enough of myself that I want to give and if it is something I have a passion to give. I’ve released the people pleaser in me.

On the other hand, Winston and I have discovered that I struggle with ‘no’ to him. We discovered this earlier, but we didn’t realize the depth until recently. We have a family event that has been planned for several months. Winston applied for a business event for that same weekend because he forgot the date. We were approved and when Winston shared the news, I was excited. I felt conflicted about which commitment we should go through with. I didn’t want to quell Winston’s excitement and I didn’t want to be the negative ninny. How could I say ‘no’ to my love? We had to fully discuss why I wasn’t sharing my ‘no’. I had to own that when Winston asked my opinion, I felt guilty. I always want Winston to feel supported and loved when it comes to his dreams and hopes, so I was scared my ‘no’ wouldn’t give him that feeling, which made me the ‘yes’ girl.

Discovering this new facet of my personality was freeing. I was disrespecting our relationship by holding my true feelings from him. We talked it through and we're hitting the family event because this guy loves me.

Winston We often feel like if we tell our partner ‘no’ maybe we’re not being supportive or that treating them like a child. I’m here to tell you that is so far from the truth. The word NO is a symbol of love. I want the Mrs. to fly high and achieve everything that her heart desires and she wants the same for me but sometimes we can overwhelm ourselves or our partner in pursuit of dreams and hopes. It’s the duty of the other partner to say this is going to be a no for me. I trust the Mrs.’s opinion 1000% because I trust that she will never steer me wrong on purpose and she always has my best interest at heart.

The opportunity was an awesome one, but it won’t be the only one. I would have had to move a lot of things around to go, it would have been costly and could have gotten me in trouble at work because I hadn’t requested the time off in the proper time. The Mrs. was torn between going with me or going to the family event. I wasn't looking at any of these things until the Mrs. and I talked it out. The NO was really a ‘hey let’s look at all that is involved in saying yes and does it make sense’. Ultimately, i don't feel any less supported and neither does the Mrs. We going to pop out at the family event like the dynamic duo that we are!

Thoughts to Leave You

Loving relationships are give and take, ups and downs, as well as yeses and nos. You have to create safe spaces for another and trust that your partner can hear you when you share your heart.

Regardless of how difficult it may be remember to give your partner the opportunity to be your strength and your boundary when it’s needed. Take the time to recognize that love lives in us.

r u o Y r a e w

E D I R P wn, lack & Bro B e h t it f es, o Bene Proceeds t rans Writers, Creativ Queer & T rs & Contributors of he Photograp UT Magazine Blaque/O

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