The Spirit Inside

The Spirit Inside BLACK AND PINK MEMBERS ON RELIGION AND SEXUALITY BEHIND BARS

Issue 1

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Black & Pink is an open family of LGBTQ prisoners and “free world� allies who support each other. Our work toward the abolition of the prison industrial complex is rooted in the experience of currently and formerly incarcerated people. We are outraged by the specific violence of the prison industrial complex against LGBTQ people, and respond through advocacy, education, direct service, and organizing. blackandpink.org

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Table of Contents Introduction......................................................................................................................................................4 Introduction......................................................................................................................................................5 Call for submissions.........................................................................................................................................7 Dear Family.......................................................................................................................................................8 Bringing up and Closing Down a Circle, Plus Creating a Sacred Space..................................................9 Interpersonal Relationships..........................................................................................................................11 Untitled............................................................................................................................................................12 Untitled............................................................................................................................................................13 God: Really......................................................................................................................................................15 Untitled............................................................................................................................................................17 Sometimes you have to speak a word over yourself‌.............................................................................19 One Love Soul Family!..................................................................................................................................21 The Changing of a Man: How God Changed one Man's Life.................................................................23 Dearest Reader................................................................................................................................................25 Resources.........................................................................................................................................................26 Prayer Request................................................................................................................................................26 Other ideas......................................................................................................................................................26 Tags...................................................................................................................................................................27 Prayer Pals.......................................................................................................................................................28

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Introduction In 2012, Black and Pink received a letter with the word “religion” on the front that said only “I'm a gay/bi man and I would like to find God. Everyone tells me that I'm going to hell, can you please send me some religious support? Thank you.” It stayed buried and unopened in a drawer for three years, and finally I can say, Yes, here is some support. I hope it helps.

In order to even begin to introduce this labor of love, I must thank every prisoner who opened up and shared their hearts, histories, and hurts with us. I try with every letter I read (more than a hundred a month) to open my heart to the writer and to try to remember them as a whole person and to carry them with me. Your words were read and appreciated, even if you do not see them collected here. (We might even have saved them for a future volume of The Spirit Inside.)

This first issue of what will be a recurring zine has largely come from writing people who have written us for religious help and instead asking them what has helped them get by. We have also had access to many years' worth of letters from prisoners across the country, lots of invaluable input from my pen-pal and friend Jery, the ideas from a small team of Black and Pink volunteers, and the donations of friends and churches from Boston and beyond.

While trying to figure out what pieces to include in this first issue, I wanted to include a variety of work that showed a lot of religions, and was in a lot of different voices. Jery wanted to make sure we were representing the best of the best. We also needed to show that the idea could work, so in the end we picked about a dozen pieces that represented different points of view. Future edition will likely be a little thicker and I hope to include more religions.

The disclaimer: In compiling this zine, I made some edits to pieces. I sometimes changed spelling or clarified grammar, or cut out parts of a longer piece. I also tried to preserve people's grammar and voice. I apologize for any errors.

Finally, again to all who contributed and will contribute in the future: thank you. I appreciate your grace in allowing me to read and collect your stories about your faiths. You shared your hearts and I want you to know your stories were received and all of them will stay with me. I've thought a lot about my own faith while reading about yours-- but you'll have to wait until next issue for that. :) Elijah Patterson 4

Introduction When I first learned my good friend Eli as going to produce a zine for the LGBTQ&+ family dedicated to our spiritual beliefs, I was skeptical as to whether it would fly with inmates and I was sure it would be a mini-Black & Pink replica (was I ever wrong!)

As time passed and Eli shared more of his thoughts and sent me rough drafts to read, we bounced ideas back and forth. I started to get excited about it. After reading some of the heartfelt testimonies in different submissions, I began to share his vision and realized this could work. Something completely new-- not a reshaping of something already existing, but a brand new idea to benefit the LGBTQ&+ family.

I'm deeply moved by what he's doing and he's doing it for us. For all of us who are incarcerated and mostly forgotten or abandoned by our bio families and our friends.

He's giving us an outlet of expression, a bridge of faith, and for some, like the writer of the three year-old letter begging for help, a light in an otherwise dark existence.

What moves me most is he didn't have to-- he has a real life out there and to me that shows his Spirit Inside.

From testimonies to prayer requests it's all for us. The success of this zine doesn't rely solely on Eli's efforts-- its success depends on all of us, the entire incarcerated LGBTQ&+ family Without all of our input-- our passion-- it's just words on paper, but together we give it life.

If you're struggling with your faith, write it down and send it in. Someone somewhere is experiencing something similar, if not the same thing. Maybe something you write will enlighten another or solve a problem for someone on the edge. Maybe it will give give you some peace.

If you need prayer, get on the list. Know religious trivia? Send it in.

Are you an artist? Draw up a cover page with The Spirit Inside title incorporated in it.

Got an idea for a recurring theme? Submit it, maybe it will stick.

Want a prayer pal? Get hooked up.

Eli wants The Spirit Inside to be diverse so it represents everyone and I want it to be the best showing with every submission.

Together all of us can make the zine something to be proud of. This is just the 5

beginning.

Lastly, I would like it encourage everyone, if you are able, to donate stamps to help get this zine to everyone who wants it. One stamp or two, or a whole book (it costs about $1.20 to mail one issue [two standard stamps plus a postcard stamp]).

Whatever you can manage would be a blessing, I'm sure. I know Eli has struggled finding ways to fund this zine, from asking churches to make copies, corralling friends for typing, ink jets and paper, it all costs money. Then there is postage. There are people within our family that have nothing. Our stamp donations will help insure everyone who wants a copy of The Spirit Inside gets one. Let's show our spirit inside.

Eli, your motives are pure, your heart is huge, and your love for us is unconditional I am blessed to have you in my life and to call you friend.

Jery R.

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Call for submissions If you wish to contribute to the next edition of The Spirit Inside, please read the following instructions carefully.

We are creating a zine and reference guide about religion and spirituality by and for LGBTQ&+ people behind bars. We request homilies, reflections, teachings, drawings, poems, resources, or other info for fellow prisoners. We welcome anything in your own words, but for space and variety not all submissions can be included. Submissions should be no longer than 3 neatly hand written pages or 2 typed pages.

With your submission about faith and prison or sexuality, please include the name of your religion/faith/spirituality (Example: Christianity, Paganism, Judaism) and your sect or denomination (Example: Baptist, none, Reform). We are especially seeking submissions from non-Christian religions not currently represented in this edition, such as Buddhism, Judaism, and Hinduism. Mail your religious submissions to: The Spirit Inside – Submission (make sure to include the word submission!)

614 Columbia Road Dorchester, MA 02125 Please note: only religious submissions will be read at this tag. **See page 27 for information on how to address other things.** Please address all other mail including non-religious/newspaper submissions to Black and Pink 614 Columbia Road Dorchester, MA 02125

All entries may be edited for spelling or content and to make it fit in the space available. By submitting content, you give The Spirit Inside permission to edit your work and to share your submission in print, online, and in other ways.

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CHRISTIAN

Dear Family

by Tim, NV The Spirit Inside, that's really an interesting topic, and one I've hoped would come up eventually. I will say to begin with, It's been a long, cold walk to find something where my heart and head finally agreed on something. This, by the way, is Tim. Unfortunately, I reside in the Nevada State Guest Resort and for the better part of 30 years been in some sort of frequent flyer program.

I'll say here that I'm a practicing Catholic. I have to say “practicing” because try as I might I'm not very good at it. But, after investigating, and experimenting with religion from one end of the spectrum to the other, Catholic is where I have landed.

But, I've been bi far longer than I've been Catholic.

Of late I've found that “tolerance” is the new watchword when speaking of religion and sexuality. I count myself unfortunate in many ways. Throughout my life I just wanted to be accepted for me, but in doing so I lost who me was so, in drug fueled episodes of lust, I lost track of the big picture.

Now, the big picture is back in focus and at 51 I'm still alone. I've never really had a relationship, and so I can count that off as celibate without too much of a reach.

Don't get me wrong, I'd love to meet someone, but not here, not now. I've wasted far too much time for me to be concerned with a relationship with myself (and I do mean myself, mail is non-existent and the local talent leaves far too much to be desired). …. I bury myself in comparative study of religion(s), Wicca, Druidry, Islam, Judaism, Catholicism, Mormanism, Christianity in all its many varieties. You know, it all comes back to acceptance. I've done all this study, picked and chosen pieces I liked, then found where they fit while finding where I fit.

I think that is what has kept me away from organized religion for so long, secrets, bias, judgmentalism, regardless of the label it's the same sentiment... “You're not one of us, you're different”or ... “you can't be one of us, you've been to prison”or ... you get the idea.

But you know, in the end we all bleed red, we all die, and if you've read the Bible we all have to answer for ourselves in the end. Me, I just hope to share my bad times to help others avoid the same. And my good times for the memories.

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EGYPTIAN PAGAN

Bringing up and Closing Down a Circle, Plus Creating a Sacred Space

by Luke A., TX As every practitioner knows, having a sacred area to operate within is imperative to obtaining the optimum results of ones meditations and magickal workings. Having been an active Egyptian Pagan for roughly 8 years, I have come to adopt and enhance the following process that has benefited me time and time again. Thus, I visualize whatever I need. How is this process started?

When ready to begin I will typically face East, for it is the direction the Moon and Sun rise in and sit in the “Indian-style” position. Initially, I began using (and still use) the energy within my spine to create the Circle. I learned that from the top of the spine to the base of the coccyx (or “tailbone”) there resides a blue line of energy that could be used for this purpose. In order to make the Circle, this energy is directed from the top of the spine down the right shoulder, arm, and then out through either the palm, finger, or fingers deosil (or in a clockwise direction).

Personal experience has taught me that when you trace the boundary of the Circle it is best to stop the flow of energy down the right arm when you get to approximately where your spine is when being directed, then begin directing the energy down your left shoulder, arm, & hand to avoid becoming uncomfortable, (see “Illustration 1”).

Once the Circle has been raised, what's next?

Making the area within a space sacred is the ideal thing at this point. I have found that when your corresponding element is used within yourself and the Circle the desired effect of being in a cleansed and sacred environment is attained. What do I mean by your “Corresponding Element?” Well, that would depend on what your Zodiac Sign is. How do you know which sign applies to you?

If your birthday is between: January 20-February 18 you are an Aquarius; February 19-March 20 a Pisces; March 21-April 19 an Aries; April 20-May 20 a Taurus; May 21-June 20 a Gemini;

June 21-July 22 a Cancer; July 23-August 22 a Leo; August 23-September 22 a Virgo; September 23-October 22 a Libra; October 23-November 21 a Scorpio; November 22-December 21 a Sagittarius; & December 22-January 19 a Capricorn.

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What about the “Corresponding Element?”

The Corresponding Elements for the Zodiac Signs are: Air-Aquarius, Gemini, Libra; Fire-Aries, Leo, Sagittarius; Earth- Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo; & Water-Cancer, Pisces, Scorpio.

(The source for the Zodiac dates and Corresponding Elements is: Mystical Dragon Magick by D.J. Conway). Now that your Corresponding Element is apparent, how do you cleanse yourself and make the circle sacred?

My own personal element is Fire, and to cleanse myself and the Circle, I envision a White Flame igniting within my stomach that I let spread throughout my body and the Circle (see “Illustration #2”). When all impurities have been removed I then extinguish the Flames inside me and follow it out until there is nothing left but a sanctified area within the Circle. Satisfied with my efforts, I will now begin my workings in the cleansed area. Once the exercise has been completed, I reabsorb the energy through the left finger, fingers, or palm, then the right finger, fingers, or palm in a widdershins (or counterclockwise direction) to reside back within the spine, thereby finishing the process of closing down the circle. This concludes how I bring up and close down a circle, along with creating a sacred space.

May this knowledge gain you beautiful results on your spiritual quest.

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CHRISTIAN-JEWISH

Interpersonal Relationships

by Chrissy L., Ph.D., GA As I've studied the Word of God, I've realized that, in essence, it's strongly about relationships. Incidentally, life at its core is also about relationships. It is written that in the beginning, the LORD GOD said, “it is not good that man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18). This Scriptural text does not only apply to an interpretation relationing to spouses, it applies to relationships in many forms. As human beings we are relational creatures and we're not created to be alone. Out relationships with God and with man are the fabric of life. In that fabric, the threads of life bind together through prayer and communion.

Wise King Solomon declared, “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow, but woe unto him that is alone when he falls; for he has not another to help him up. Again, if two lie down together then they have heat, but how can one warm alone?” (Ecclesiastes 4:911) In the modern society there is a persistent, if unfounded, suspicion in most of us that we can solve our own problems and be the captain of our own “one-man-crew” ship. Yet the fact of the matter is that by ourselves we can only be consumed by our problems and suffer shipwreck. A certain truth: what we are at any given moment will be defined by our relationships with those whom we love and those whom we refuse to love.

Truly, a relationship can be only as good as its communication. If you and I honestly tell each other who we are, that is, what we think, judge, feel, value, love, honor, esteem, hate, fear, desire, believe in, and are committed to-- then and only then can each of us grow. Only then can each of us be who and what we really are, say what we really think, tell what we really feel, and communicate being to being. This is the real meaning of the “authenticity” of a person: that you can be honest in the communication of your person to others. Without interpersonal relationships, we aren't even alive, we are pale, imitational shades of ourselves. Empty husks. Open up. Open up. It's time. Open up to God and open up to your fellow wo/man. Are you tired of being alone? You were created for relations.

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NO FAITH

Untitled

by Elva M., TX I have no faith. No faith in mankind, I can’t trust the gods, The God, the coming of whatever or whoever is coming. I wasn’t raised in the church; I went to the church— Presbyterian for the bubblegum rain, Nazarene for potluck dinners, Baptist to learn that hell had reserved a place for me. A bi-sexual girl who believes sex is the only reason anyone ever had any use for me. Or any love for me.

I thought of Wicca; I wrote of Ásatrú; Native American; Greek Gods; The Trinity and the Hebrew Goddess. But I can’t trust; every time faith fails me. I tell my friends I’m a commercialist, holidays are what I love. Cards, presents, decorations, costumes, parties, cake, food, and families coming together. Twinkling lights, happy songs, hopes, dreams, laughter; I love the ways holidays sound, how they look and how they smell. The bigger, the better.

Sometimes I wonder if my girlfriend is my God. It seems too often I breathe merely to please her. In supplication, on my knees, it is she I worship. I see her and something blossoms inside of me; hope unfurls a tattered little wing. She’s created a world for me where once there was only chaos. I’m certain some will say this is not the way it is supposed to be. After two and a half years she’s still the air I breathe.

She’s the only one not to take from me, not to hurt me, not to scream at me, not to raise their fist and belittle me. I find no fault in this relationship I have with her.

I can’t trust Gods because I can’t understand how it works. Intelligently, I need to unravel mysteries into little bits of facts. I can’t say that these Gods have ever had my back. People say: “God is good all the time,” but I think it’s just the lyric of a song they sing to themselves: a lullaby to bring them comfort. We can say this because we are Americans but elsewhere people cry: “why have you forsaken me?!” right before they needlessly die.

Yes, I have no religion. Nothing I can define. It’s when my girlfriend holds me in her hands that I find any peace. It’s on my knees, praying not to be caught, nestled in her thighs that joy washes over me when I hear my angel sigh. Maybe I worship what she brings to me, what she’s created in me. All I know is I finally find heaven when I look in her eyes.

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NATIVE AMERICAN CHURCH

Untitled

By Jeri T., MO My spiritual journey began at a very, very young age. I can remember being taught my native language and listening to many of our different stories told about spirituality, traditions, and culture. I was raised by my beloved grandmother, I did have both parents-- only a mile separated my parents' house and my grandmother's.

My father and his uncles were active in the Native American Church, which was established in the early 1800s, and which as actually recognized by the US government in the early 1900s. It was my learning these practices where I developed an understanding [of] the importance of meditation and spiritual songs. How fasting would and has helped me maintain a spiritual balance, even with understanding our environment (Creation) helped me along my spiritual path/walk. It was my [being taught] to respect all our spiritual items and rituals that strengthened me to respect [my]self. One must respect oneself in order to respect others.

It wasn't until my early teens that I realized I had a pulling to do things that women did. I fought with these feelings until one day I was questioned by my elders. Once thing that is part of our Oral Teachings is “Not ask Why.” In Our Creators' time all will get answered. Listening and observing is how we are told to learn. All our spiritual and cultural stories have a lesson to be learned-- even our Creation that surrounds us teaches us on a daily basis. One must be aware of our Creation to grasp what is being taught. Awareness is developed and strengthened by our positive steps along our spiritual path/walk.

It was told to me, by elders, not to fight or question my spirit, to let go and allow myself to develop as was intended. Also told to me was that I was what is called “Winkte,” and translated [it] means TWO-SPIRITS1. Later on in life I was told many stories of my elders, and different tribal elders, stories, of the Winkte (two-spirits).

Stories of how Winktes are always considered to be very spiritual, humble, and prayerful individuals. It as even believed by many tribes that a second name given to a child (at a family's request) by a Winkte was an honor and afforded the child with long life. Two spirits are today considered respected artists for their quality and workmanship of Native crafts.

1 Editor's note: “Two-spirit(s)” is a Native term to describe people who are not women or men. People who are not Native should not use it. Other words are queer, genderqueer, gender fluid, androgynous, etc. Eli.

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Since my incarceration, I helped get the Native American Spiritual Circle started back in the early 1990s. It was once of the first Native American Religious Callouts in this state. Since that time, every facility now has a Callout. I came to realize that all this was a test that our Creator put me through that I found an even more deeper passion for my religion, culture, and traditions-- and has made my spiritual path/walk easier. Yet, the bigger/greater test is to deal with this prison setting and having to confront this prison way of thinking. I did not have a lot of outside help with the administration, but it was the inmate population that was a hurdle I have crossed, that was the hardest for me.

In 2010, I was made the Facilitator and placed on the inmate Religious Advisory committee, and I have held this position [to this] very day. I thank Our Creator daily for giving me the wisdom and knowledge, also his divine help in allowing me to overcome defeat, ridicule, and misunderstanding-- most of all, by my belief and faith in prayer.. Above all, by my being Two Spirit (Winkte) has not hindered my walk on this spiritual path that I was so, so graciously placed upon. All this is due to Our Creator-- therefore all praise, honor, and glory is solely due to and for Him only. I am and will always be His vessel and my continued prayer is for Him to use me as He will.

I am full blood Native American and was born and raised in southwest Oklahoma. I have always followed my Native Religion, although I am very familiar with Christianity and other religious beliefs, I never get tired of learning all religious ways. I was also taught to respect all religious beliefs. And that we all may worship and even refer to our Creator by different names, we all praise, honor, and glorify, even pray to the same Creator of all life. ‌.

Blessed be and “Ah-Ho� (thank you).

My religion has changed in that I no longer practice Christianity, I practice multiple religions so that I can have advice from more than one source. The only real obstacles at Lansing is having to do a lot of paperwork if you want to change your religion.

--Anthony C., KS (Hindu [sidda yoga[)

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CHRISTIAN

God: Really

by Jeff U., WA The Christian faith has been a sore spot for the LGBT community for some time now.

Its representers have riddled us with scripture with the intention of condemnation.

For many in our community, the very mention of Jesus or God brings on very high emotions. Typically very bad emotions. Memories of hate and deceit by our fellow brothers.

Despite this, I have no choice but to believe in the lord Most High. For me, the Jesus I know, He loves me. I don't know the Jesus they speak of. Let me tell you about the God who saved me. Because he is beautiful and loving and caring and cries when I cry and lifts me up when I am down. He is a God who can't wait to interact with me.

I am completely unashamed to claim I love and follow Jesus Christ, the God. Here in prison I was hated. I mean pure hate. From the very first day I knew my life was in danger. No one thought I was anything worth saving. No one had any trouble making sure I knew exactly what my role was.

Then God called me. When I was lonely and friendless and ready to follow anything that might end in death. I thought this God must be different than the Christian God, because the Christians hate me. “We love you, but hate your sin.� I hate that sentence. God instilled in my heart His love. He spoke to me the only way I would listen: through others.

Then I would read scripture and something would stand out. He would speak to me that way. Slowly, I fell in love. I got to know a God who not only made me this way, but loves me for it.

My dearest friends, please hear me when I say, God loves you. Jesus really did die for you. You are not a mistake, you are not an abomination. You are beautiful. God says He loves you and His Children are not perfect and get His word wrong sometimes. He knows your struggle, He understands people have hurt you, sometimes His people. But siblings rarely get along, family can cut the deepest, can't they. You are not perfect and neither are they. The good news is God will talk to you if you listen. It starts and ends with communication. Talk to Him, yell at Him, cry at Him, whatever. Just talk to Him because, friends, He is anxious for your return. He cries for you nightly, anticipating the day you'll return to his loving arms. He doesn't 15

care what you've done, just come home.

Not all of His followers will love you, but they don't matter. How do you get to Heaven? Not through them, believe that! You get to Heaven by believing Jesus died 2000+ years ago, was raised 3 days later, thus making a new covenant with us, abolishing the old. Believe in your heart and confess with your lips and yes you are saved! Don't let anyone tell you differently.

The Bible can be confusing and difficult to understand. How many men claim to know its real and true meaning? But there is one thing as a guide, Does it end in love? If it doesn't then it is wrong. Period. End of conversation.

Recent discoveries in language meaning, ancient civilizations and new research, have shed new light on the Bible and its original meanings. The Bible does not condemn homosexuality, in fact it doesn't mention it, not initially.

You're not a mistake, cursed, or whatever else anyone has told you. As LGBT community members, we are forced to believe God loves us based on real Faith: the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen. We have real faith, raw, unwaivering faith. It's real because be must believe based on our uniqueness, [our] God-given differences. Don't blame God for the actions of men. Look at all your choices, you're not perfect. You've chosen some pretty dark paths.

I love you. By God's hand, I love you. Because he loved me first.

Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some have entertained angels without knowing it. Remember those who are in prison, as if you were their fellow prisoners, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.

--Hebrews 13:1-3

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MUSLIM

Untitled

By Hammad A., MA I took my Shahadah (Declaration of Faith) on March 4, 2010. I legally changed my name on Feb 12, 2014. Since becoming a Muslim I have found I am more forgiving towards others, although not so much with the various forms of Western media for their blatant drive for lumping ALL Muslims as terrorists. Are all Christians terrorists because of Jim Jones or Timothy McVey? Certainly not. Islam comes from the Arabic word “Salam,” which means “peace.”

Once considered an outsider by my peers, as a Muslim I have found acceptance through the Muslim community, which has helped me to come out of my shell and associate more with other inmates. Although there are no obvious problems with the administration in outward appearances, the previous administration treated our previous Imam [religious leader] with intimidation and he would give in to their demands. Our new Imam is the exact opposite and one can see a slow but forward movement of the Muslim community (Deen) and a handful of other inmates , but my strongest support comes from my two friends I met through B&P, and my fiance I also met through B&P. My friends are Liz (a civilian volunteer), Jeri, an inmate penpal in Missouri, and my fiance Amy Jane I met through B&P's pen-pal listings.

One issue I have with Islam is, like Christianity and Judaism, a ban on same-sex relationships. I accepted being bisexual when I was 14 and Amy Jane is a pre-op T.G. As it is said, “You can't help who you fall in love with!” And so within the inner turmoil with Islam I have found peace and acceptance and with Amy I found the woman I only dreamed existed only in my fantasy. I'm looking at hitting the streets in July 2017 and she and I will be married! So to anyone reading the piece, if you are searching for a relationship or a simple friendship, you can find both, as I did through B&P! In Islam, the Qur'an is the inspired Word of God. For the true or sincere Muslim, we accept the Bible as also being the inspired Word of God (Allah is just the Arabic version of the English name of God).

You asked for a short passage and what it means to me. I shall take a quote from my “The Glorious Qur'an” (the Qur'an is published by many names and yet all are the same), 2009 edition. I will then site its reference in my copy of “The Holy Bible, King James Version,” Jan 2013 edition.

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Qur'an Surah (chapter): Ayat (verse) 3:47 She (Mary, mother of Jesus)said: My Lord! How can I have a child when no mortal hath touched me? He (the Arch-angel Gabriel) said: So it will be. Allah createth what He will. If he decreeth a thing, He hath said unto it only: Be! and it is. [In the Bible, Gospel of St Luke 1:26-35] 3:59: Lo! The likeness of Jesus with Allah is as the likeness of Adam He created him (Adam) out of dust, then he said to him, Be! and he is. [found in Genesis 1:27] The miracle birth of Jesus is undisputed in Islam and Christianity. It is the same manner in which God created Adam. Since Islam, Christianity, and Judaism accept on faith the creation of man, and we are called “People of the Book,� the three Abrahamic faiths, Jew, Christian, and Muslim who can trace their lineage back to the prophet Abraham. We believe that through Abraham is his ancestor Noah who is descended from Adam and thus all humans are, therefore, related to one another.

For me this means that I must make an honest effort to treat others as I do my own family-- because we are! This is what I have come to accept as fact and its meaning should be a wake-up call for all of us.

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CHRISTIAN

Sometimes you have to speak a word over yourself…

by Minister Antonio R., NV One of my favorite gospel songs says: Sometimes you have to speak a word over yourself. This song is so powerful, and so true. It has become the harbinger to my soul. It is said that when there is no one to encourage you, you should be more than willing to encourage yourself in the Lord. You need to do this every single day, it does make a difference.

I am very much aware of how it feels to be discriminated against. However I am a child of God, and so are you. God is always concerned about you and I. When the world turns its back, or try to make you feel like you do not matter—God wants you to know that you do matter. God will never abandon his children, so never let the devil fool you with those lies.

As it is stated in 1 Samuel 16:7 KJV… “But the Lord said unto Samuel, look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.”

When it comes to the LGBTQ community, we are all filled with greatness and uniqueness. Always hold your head high because you are special.

My prayer for the LGBTQ community is that we love one another, and always join one another in unity. When one of us falls, allow us to be the ones to help one another up. Together in great numbers we can change laws that discriminate against us. Let us join together across the nation, and the world. God knew each of us before we became a thought. Always stay prayed up, and never forget to pray one for the other.

Never allow the ignorance of those who do not understand you to rob you of your joy. If you come across as weak, the enemy will defeat you. It is so important to remember that God loves you just as you are. We, the LGBTQ community, are beautiful people. See the beauty within yourself. When we look at one another we should see God, for we were created out of love, along with greatness, in the image of God. God has promised to keep us, and he will never fail us. Although men often are unrighteous in keeping their promises, surely God will keep his. God will never fail 19

any of us. He may not show up when we want him, but he is right on time. “Him who comes to me I shall by no means cast out” (John 6:37). According to Hebrews 13:5, “I will never leave thee nor forsake thee.”

My LGBTQ family, I will always stand with you an I will always pray for you. So rise like the air, soar like the eagle. Unite in peace as well as love. Pray for those who do you wrong, pray for those who slander your name. Defeat the enemy in love, and call out the mighty name of Jesus—it’s then the enemy will have no choice except to flee.

I love you all, and remember with God all things are more than possible. May his grace be with each of you. I pray for the blood of Christ to cover each of you.

Embrace who you are, and love who you are. God has your back and so do I. Remember you all have more with you who love you than those who are against you. May you rest in the loving peace of Jesus Christ. Amen.

'I was hungry and you gave me something to eat. I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink. I was a stranger and you invited me in. I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.' And the righteous will answer him “When?” ... 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of Mine, you did for Me.' --Jesus Christ, Matthew 25:35-36, 40

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CHRISTIAN

One Love Soul Family!

By Valencia/Vance, GA I would like to share my story with a family of kindred souls whom share this heavy load that we have been forced to bear, and rise above, just because of our sexual preference.

Amidst all of my miseries, my confusion, and lack of understanding, my strong desire to want to know the Truth inspired GOD to show me the way….In the midst of our shared opposition and hatred, I simply and sincerely wanted to understand the Truth, and I humbly appealed to Our Heavenly Father—“Father, did you call me and my kind an abomination? Amen.”

A grander part of me just could not me believe or accept that GOD viewed me as an abominable thing, and so, since some person or people have influence almost half the world into believing that GOD hates us, only GOD could be the one I chose to rightly answer my questions, that’s only if GOD really cared enough to answer my sincere, heartfelt prayers. In 1992, after being arrested, and while facing a possible life sentence, I seriously sought for GOD to discover the truth of the matter. In a way, in that Newton County Jail, you could say that I became a Renunciate, or monk, and Prison became my Monastery. Today, twenty four years later, I will now humbly admit that “when the student is ready for spiritual learning, the teacher will appear,” and it was GOD whom I chose to instruct me. ….

When a human is inspired towards GOD for Knowledge, Wisdom, and Overstanding, for the Betterment of the Whole—the source of Life, Love, and Consciousness will set your feet upon the “Path to Enlightenment.” There have been many humans who have walked this planet, just like you and I, whose inquisitive minds and understanding hearts have demonstrated themselves to be Alpha males and Alpha females, or nature’s leaders unto their peers. ….

The appropriate Source and satisfying reply to all of humanities questions and needs of yester-years and today, is founded and answered by God, and through the conduit of Divine Revelations. This is the persistent belief—factually proven and supported—that (at major moments of human need) GOD reveals himself through Appearances in human form, that have been predestined to come….

The point behind this glimpse through my eyes, and the eyes of other enlightened 21

minds, is to remind you all of the fact that, within each of us, is the ability to be a Master, a Divine Messenger, a Divine Warrior, or an Avatar. It is through fearlessly answering your questions, and facing and overcoming your fears and limitations that each of you can likewise begin to unravel that mystery called life. It is through unceasingly persisting towards the Solutions to all of your questions, and learning to love all beings unconditionally that your gifts will be made known to you, and restored unto you too. True unconditional love comes from understanding that each and every one of us humans come to this planet from the same Source, and will likewise return back to the source from which we come. Each of us is here, within every situation that we may find ourselves in life, with a specific divine purpose for being born.

This is only a Glimpse of what God in his love has shared with me. My hope is that this sharing is only the Beginning. I have been shown and taught so much… and I still have so much more to say….

All of our ideology must rise up against the oppressor. All diversities must move to join in the struggle for the respect of everybody’s right to be separate and still uniting as respecters of all other that to not inflict oppression to our way of happiness. We must keep learning from the Holy texts if we want to learn of the other wise individuals, who put forth the ethics that are life’s good building blocks.

-Jam, TX

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CHRISTIAN

The Changing of a Man: How God Changed one Man's Life

by Rev. Dr. Derek M., OH How can I start my story? I must start at the time of my incarceration. I was arrested in Indianapolis, Indiana in the month of April, 1982 for forgery. I was taken to the county jail and booked. After sitting in the cage I was taken to a holding cell where I sat alone because I had a fugitive warrant to hold for the state of Ohio for murder. I placed my head into my hands and said to myself, My life is over, when I heard a voice from out of no where saying, Your life is not over, it has just begun. I didn't understand the meaning of it at the time, but as I now write these words I now understand my place and purpose in life day after day. I saw the prison system change from a physical system to a mental one and the people as well. When I first started the average age group of a prisoner was 25 to 50 Now the average is for 17 to 35 or 45. Now there is a group of us that have been classed old law inmates and we are in the range of 50 to 75. We have to face the the parole board, but those under the new law have an out date and they know just when they are going home. We on the other hand are held in limbo without a chance of ever knowing when we will be released, if ever. I am one of those in limbo.

Now back to the touch of God. On Feb 9th, 1983 I became an ordained minister for all the wrong reasons, to just dupe people out of their money for my own selfish needs, but God had other plans for me and there was nothing I could do about it. The Spirit was too strong to fight. The more I tried to find ways to do wrong, the more God opened my eyes to his way and his grace. So the more I searched the Bible to find words to work out my evil plan, the more the spirit began to work on me. I mean God hit me hard. The spirit was so strong I just stopped fighting and gave in. I started to read the Bible more and more. The more I read, the more I began to see God's purpose for me. I started to talk to people about their lives and found myself preaching to them unaware at the time. They told me I said things that hit them right in the heart, that I had touched the spirit in them deeply and if I were to open a church, they would come. I went to the parole board in 1998 and received 10 more years after serving 15. I kept studying. In 2008, I received 5 more and in 2013 I received 3 more, but it was as they gave me one hour each time. God was at work in my life. Again I kept on studying the Word, taking courses to improve my worth to God. To become the best steward I could be, not only for God, but for myself and others as well. I had to be a light, a way, a rope for others to grab hold of, a shepherd 23

for the people.

I lost my mother, father, my only sibling, my beloved sister Karen. All of my uncles, aunts, grandparents, and cousins had passed away. I became the elder of my family.

God gave me so much peace and strength during this time in my life I couldn't believe it. I know God is real and that he lives within me without a doubt. This is why I am writing this at this time in my life. The change has taken hold of me not only in my physical life, but more and more in my spiritual being as well. I now can see the path of life with God so much clearer, so much plainer, and t has become a joy to be able to share this life story with you. Maybe in some small way this will touch the reader with the power of God that is within me, that same power that caused me to write this truth for all to see in this age and time of need.

People are always looking for a sign from God when the signs are all around them to see. All you need to do is take just a little time, stop and look and listen and you will see and hear God talking right to you just as he has done with me. God changed my life and made me see the true path of life in him.

So take the time to read your Bible, study the worlds, don't just read them, study them, then look for the real lesson, the true and deep meaning of the words of God, because they will talk to you and open your eyes to the real power of God and He will give you peace beyond your wildest dreams.

Please believe me, because God is REAL. In closing, I want the reader to understand that I use the word God but God is whatever name you use to identify the the Grand Architect of the Universe and everything thing within it, even you. It is your own personal relationship between you and that Spiritual being, because there is only one Power, one Spirit, and one Force and it lives within you. So tap into it. You will find peace, joy, happiness, but most of all, true love for God, yourself, and others.

May the reader of these words be blessed by the power that lives within us all! This is called the awakening to life in the true self, the awaking of the god-self that God made you to be. Again I say, it is within you if only you take the time to search for it Look deep within yourself be real with yourself, find a place where you can be all alone and you will find the real you, the God you, waiting to unfold for you, and show its real self. This won't happen overnight because you are a work in progress and you have to put in work as well to show yourself improved, becoming the good steward is hard work. So let God go to work within your life, PLEASE. Let the Godself shine that lives within you. Be the light.

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CHRISTIAN

Dearest Reader

by Rev. Nathan/Evangeline O., OH My name is Rev. Nathan O. I also go by Evangeline O. because I am a two-spirited transgender male to female, but I have had no transition done.

I grew up Baptist, but God has lead me on a different path to find Him with the prison time I have done, which is eleven years. I have done seven years of that time.

My religion has went from a Baptist holier-than-thou (or you) complex to a personal relationship with Christ Jesus and a quest to find God, and not to judge others or to tar them down with indoctrination, but to help them find God through Christ Jesus.

Isaiah 55:8 KJV Bible says “for my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my way,” I do not pretend to to know what God wants, but I go by faith that He does want all to be saved. St. John 3:17 JKV Bible says “For God so loved the world that he sent his son not to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved.” To me, that means the LGBTQ community as well.

God's mission for me is to start a church for the LGBTQ community. He wants one in every major city in every state so people have some where to worship him.

I don't have problems practicing my faith [in prison] because it's only me, Christ, and God. If anyone else want to be taught or join? Yes! They can, but they will have their own personal relationship with Christ and God, like me.

My support in my faith comes through my faith in God through Christ in which the Holy Spirit will guide and teach me.

I hope that whoever reads this will want to find peace, happiness, joy, wealth, and friendship with God and His son.

My life verse is Isaiah 41:6 KJV Bible “They helped every one his neighbor, and everyone said to his brother, Be of good courage.”

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In the future, we hope to include religious trivia, quotes, art, poetry, etc.

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Prayer Pals We are trying to team up committed LGBTQ& prayer partners (no freeworlders).

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