Bittersweet Zine: March 2021 Issue

1 YEAR

March marks a year since COVID-19 affected our norm the question of how life has changed since last March. ‘reflection’ mean to you? We would like to shine the about our journey through these changing times. Whe there has been an evident growth and change in all of u emotions, thoughts, and feelings to live, and a commu issue was made with a lot of love, and each submission h personal, and they delivered. From poems, to puzzles, minds and ideas from around the world. Our theme is c bold and bright aesthetic to complim

Scan the spotify code on the upcoming page, sit back, a to check us out on Instagram @Bittersweetzine to stay featured as a cr

mal lives in North America. In this month’s issue we posed . With the many changes we faced, what does the term spot light on the many experiences we all have to tell ether it be joy, sadness, achievements, grief, or doubts, us. Our goal is to create a collective space for all these unal opportunity to reflect on all of them. The March holds its own power. We challenged each creator to get to personal journeys; the March Issue is a collection of centered around Reflection, and we decided to go with a ment each submission and its energy.

and enjoy the March Issue of Bittersweet Zine. Be sure y updated with upcoming issues, and for a chance to be reator yourself.

365 DAYS

THIS MONTH’S CREATORS

PG. 8

ELLA BROOK ELLA BROOK IS A WRITER, SOCIAL ISSUES ACTIVIST AND A MUSICIAN. SHE FOSTERS AN ONLINE COMMUNITY WITH SHARED INTERESTS AND PASSIONS, WITH A SIDE NOTE OF EDUCATING, ALL WHILE HAVING FUN! READING BOOKS, TEA, AND THINKING ABOUT FAVORITE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS IS WHAT FILLS UP HER FREE TIME. YOU CAN FIND HER IN INSTAGRAM AND TIK TOK AT @AMSPOET.

JORDAN SPIERS JORDAN SPIERS IS A QUEER WOMAN WITH A BACHELOR’S DEGREE IN KINESIOLOGY, AND IS CURRENTLY WORKING TOWARDS A POSITION WITHIN HER FIELD. JORDAN ALSO HAS EXPERIENCE WORKING AT CHAPTERS/INDIGO, AND IS NOW COLLECTING HER OWN LITTLE LIBRARY OF GREAT READS, WITH A RANGE OF BOOKS FROM HARRY POTTER TO SAPIENS TO SOMETHING A LITTLE ‘SPICY. IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT JORDAN IS READING, OR NEED A RECOMMENDATION, REACH OUT TO HER ON INSTAGRAM AT @JORDANSPIERS.

PG. 12

KIMBERLY STEWART “SAGITTARIUS WITH A HANGER PROBLEM”. KIMBERLY STEWART IS FROM YELLOWKNIFE, NWT, LOVES ALL THINGS POP-CULTURE AND INDEPENDENT ACTIVITIES, SUCH AS MOVIES AND TV, PODCASTS, AND PUZZLES OF ALL VARIETIES. SHE LOVES TO SHARE HER PASSIONS AND IS QUICK TO RECOMMEND A NEW MOVIE OR SHOW TO BINGE. YOU CAN FIND HER IN INSTAGRAM AT @KIMPOSSIBLEYK AND TWITTER AT @KIMPOSSIBLEYK.

JP LOVE A YOUNG AUSTRALIAN WRITER WHO’S RE-DISCOVERING HER LOVE FOR CREATIVE WRITING, ONE PIECE AT A TIME. HER WORK ENCAPTURES ITNENSE FEELINGS AND PASSION AS WELL AS THE EXPLORATION OF THE TRANSITION PAST A RELATIONSHIP. YOU CAN FIND HER AT @SIGNED.BY.LOVE

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PG. 10

PG. 14

FAITH MARION

PG. 13

FAITH MARION CAN BE DESCRIBED AS A WRITER, AND A PIXAR THEORY EXPERT. CURRENTLY LEGENDARY AT MAKING MILKSHAKES. SHE IS INTERESTED IN WRITING BOTH MUSIC AND POETRY, AND IS LEARNING HOW TO ANIMATE IN HER FREE TIME. RAISED IN A SMALL TOWN, AND NOW LIVING IN A BIG CITY, FAITH NOW PLANS TO EXPLORE HER PASSIONS, LEARN AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE ABOUT ANIMATION, AND MAKE THE WORLD’S BEST MILKSHAKE.

EMMA MARION EMMA MARION IS A WRITER, PHOTOGRAPHER, AND ACTIVIST. SHE HAS HER BACHELORS DEGREE IN COMMUNICATIONS AND FILM, AND IS PASSIONATE ABOUT ALL THINGS MEDIA AND POPCULTURE. SHE USES HER VOICE AND CREATIVE POWER TO CREATE BITTERSWEET ZINE WITH ONE OF HER BEST FRIENDS, AND IS THRILLED TO SEE THE ZINE COME TO LIFE EACH MONTH. SHE IS A BIG FAN OF MUSIC, AND CURATES PLAYLISTS FOR EACH ISSUE THEME. SO SEE MORE OF HER WORK, FIND HER ON INSTAGRAM @EMMAMARIEMARION.

PG. 22

PG. 16

DANIELA OLIVARES ASPIRING TO BE AN ARCHITECT, DANIELA IS FOCUSED ON FINDING SOLUTIONS FOR SOCIAL ISSUES TO DRIVE HER ARCHITECTURAL WORK. SHE IS PASSIONATE ABOUT DESIGN METHODS TO CONSTRUCT A FAIR FUTURE. SHE HAS EMBARKED ON THE PROJECT OF CO-EDITOR OF BITTERSWEET ZINE WITH HER BESTIE EMMA MARION, AND IS THRILLED TO CONTINUE THIS WORK MONTH TO MONTH. YOU CAN FIND MORE OF HER WORK AT @DANIELA.OLIVARES.ARCH

SHANTELLE BRON-PEREIRA SHANTELLE BRON-PEREIRA IS SELF-DESCRIBED AS “STRONG OF MIND AND THICC OF ASS”. SHE IS A WRITER, AND A STUDENT AT CONCORDIA UNIVERSITY IN MONTRÉAL, STUDYING ENGLISH LITERATURE AND POLITICAL SCIENCE. FIND HER ON INSTAGRAM @PLANTELLEPEREIRA STRENGTHS: GETTING PEOPLE TO READ LEFTIST THEORY, BEING SALTY, LOWER BODY. WEAKNESSES: CRIES WHEN MAD, WRITING BIOS.

PG. 24

MARCH 2021 ISSUE 5

BITTERSWEET

March PLaylist Turn that frown upside down!

The March issue playlist is determined to remind you of two things: 1) sadness can result in beautiful art, and 2) good times will come again.

Although not all of these songs were written during quarantine times, I believe these lyrics match the feelings of what we all experienced collectively while being so far apart. From loneliness to COVID Christmases to not getting haircuts-- this playlist sums up the quarantine days and the feelings that tagged along.

The first half of this playlist focuses on emotions and feelings, while the second half reminds us what we have to look forward to or what fun events we used to attend. Yes, we may be missing out on concerts and seeing our loved ones, but it’s not forever! Its temporary madness, and were all experiencing it together. Your world may feel like its crashing, but please remember you’re not alone, even though it feels and looks like it. I’m out here struggling in ways I never imagined, and my neighbor is too. There’s some beauty in this collective trauma, right? We may have been locked away from each other for a year, but that won’t stop us. We will wait patiently until we can safely dance among each other again!

The second half of this playlist is for those moments we long for and crave! Being drunk with your friends at 2am on a Friday, going on a camping trip with your family, or just throwing a dance party in your room whenever you’re ready for it. Use these songs to remember what it’s like to be around people; both strangers and friends. Get your body moving, and turn off your mind for a moment.

Think of the first half of the playlist as a hug, and the second part of the playlist as a dance! These songs have helped me get through the last year, in one way or another, and I find them to be the perfect mixture of Reflection songs. Scan the Spotify code, and enjoy!

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A few words on a couple pieces...

Hug songs: Room- Ethan Tasch Feeling trapped and unequipped to change your situation is exactly what this song is about. I think we’ve all felt claustrophobia like this at one point or another.

Perhaps even more so over this last year. The smooth acoustic guitar and silky vocals make this song a treat to listen to. It will catch your attention, and delight your ears with its simple

Dance Songs: Arms tonite- Mother Mother This pop indie song makes me feel like the main character in a coming of age film. Being in love and with the person you love is fucking cool and great, and nothing else matters when you’re with person. It’s such a great feeling that even if you died, you’d be okay, because you’d be with them in their arms. Leave it to Mother Mother to make death awfully romantic. I find this song to be the perfect song for this playlist because it expresses how significant touch and closeness can be. As many of us have felt deprived of human contact, especially with the ones we love the most, the extreme

yet sincere lyrics. Ethan Tasch, a small artist from Los Angeles, did a lovely job at capturing how it feels to go mad over one’s normal routines and usual places. A feeling that was in abundance over the last year.

To hear these feelings put into words in a catchy tune is so satisfying and calming. This soulful indie tune is a great listen, and I am definitely excited to see what Ethan Tasch creates next.

Quarantined With YouLawrence The perfect accumulation of words to describe exactly what quarantining with someone you love is like. Being stuck at home is one thing, but being stuck

message of this song seems that much more relevant. It feels like when we finally get the chance to be with our people again, we wont be able to give it up again.

Under the Weather- Mac Miller The go-go-go of reality can sometimes overwhelm us, and quarantine put us in our place and made us reflect on all the things we took for granted. Its so easy to get caught up in what’s in front of you, or your 9-5 job, but all the stress and anxiety that tags along with those is just temporary. You must take moments to breathe, and remember everything’s going to be okay. Mac Miller reminds us that the outside bullshit doesn’t matter, and to focus on you and your mind. Everything

with your favourite person in the world makes it much less scary.

Granted, not everyone had the privilege of being quarantined with a person they care about like this, but I think this song perfectly sums up how it felt for those quarantine couples. The lyrics pinpoint the exact madness that the world underwent, and somehow flips that madness into a refined, jazzy, love song. Listen to the lyrics of this lovely ballad, and try to tell me it doesn’t make quarantine sound more fun that it actually was.

will be okay. Stress and anxiety may follow wherever you go, be it at your 9-5 job or stuck in quarantine alone, and it’s up to you to breathe and continue on. Process whats happening to you, but remember you’re a strong person whose been through worse. Mac Miller, as always, knew exactly how to put these feelings into flowy and powerful words. The lyrics of this rap make for an appropriate example on remaining calm after the storm, and letting the water roll off your back. However it’s really the title of this track that makes it the perfect addition for this playlist, and leaves us on a reminder to wash your hands, wear your mask, and if you feel ‘Under the Weather”, stay the fuck home!

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I have many homes and I do not need another. I am my own person.

Deciding to get to know myself was a breakthrough in my life.

As everyone, I started with nothing but a bright, empty space, opening the windows, daring to let sunlight in. Every time I’d make a new discovery, I’d carefully place it on display, like some sort of an exhibit, a reminder, to help me remember what I’m building with. Tragedies would appear out of the bluest skies, flooding the rooms, destroying my progress.

Overtime I learned it is best to lock the doors, close the fences, and even barricade the windows. I am often not proud of that decision. but I stand in my own place, believing it to be home.

Self-reflection is a funny thing; it leaves you alone.

By: ella brook

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MY M I DN IG HT LI BR ARY

BY J O R DA N S PI E R S

I had a job interview a couple months ago. I didn’t get the job, but I was asked a question that really caught me off guard – “What have you learned over this last year?” This took me a minute because I am desperately trying to forget this year. I am growing increasingly dissatisfied with my job.

I rekindled some relationships that should have stayed dark. My mental health jumped through hoops, ran the 100-meter sprint, and tripped over a hurdle. But in that moment, I had 3 people in mind. I lost an Uncle during the early stages of the pandemic to COVID-19. He was such a soft soul in this hard world. My Grampy called me “sweetheart” for the last time. What I wouldn’t give for one last word or hug.

A cousin was suddenly and tragically removed from our lives, leaving behind her husband and two lovely, little boys.

Not to mention the immense amount of family, friends, and students that she cared for, influenced, and loved.

Her death rocked our family in a way I had never felt. I have dealt with my fair share of grief, but this year was 10

different. I was closer to those I lost, and the general loneliness has been beyond consuming. So, I told my interviewer, “This year, I learned that tomorrow is not a guarantee.” There’s no blueprint.

None of us thought we would be living through a pandemic. I might not see this get published, and that’s just something we get to accept as a part of the human condition.

Matt Haig wrote in his book, The Midnight Library, “...That you can choose choices, but not outcomes.” To be honest, there were a lot of quotes in this book that I related to, too many to dissect in this space, many far too long. It follows Nora Seed, who tries to take her own life when she struggles to figure out what exactly she is living for anymore. She wakes up in a limbo, taking on the presence of a library. She’s not quite dead, and she’s not quite alive.

Time has stopped while she is here, in order for her to visit her “what-if” lives.

Each choice she never made starts a new book, and she has to live through them until she finds one she can be truly happy in. I will say the ending of this

TW

suicide and depression

book is controversial, and I don’t even necessarily love it, but the journey is worth it.

Do you have “what-if” lives, fantasizing about going to school in Vienna? Or maybe something smaller, a life where you got the courage to talk to someone you admired. I have always spent a little too much time on the what-if’s, but The Midnight Library really made me think about them more. I once thought about doing my degree in the UK, since I have family there, specifically my Grampy. I think about leaving my bedroom and hearing “Morning Sweetheart!”. We drink a cuppa and he tells me stories about his youth, about my dad’s, and even about me as a baby before I moved here. A life where I could attend his funeral in person and not at 4am on a Monday, in my bed, all alone, via Zoom. I also dream of life where I never hear the world “Zoom” again, anyone else? I imagine a life where I didn’t take the first full time job available to me after graduating university because I had rent to pay. A life where I spent my early 20s working tirelessly in

a field that made a positive impact on my community, where I am genuinely happy to wake up every morning, and not just waiting out the clock. I envision a life where I didn’t let someone insanely special to me walk away so easily. A life where I could have helped her realize that her true self is the best part of her, no matter what her parents think.

Sometimes, I think about a life where I stayed living on my own. I have always been an introvert at heart, but I also form attachments easily. I often wonder if living alone would have helped me try to get out my job sooner, given me more time to learn about myself, and didn’t encourage my reliance on others. But I don’t live in any of these lives.

We all have our own versions of our Midnight Library, full of regrets, lost loves, or wild fantasies. But we are not fictional characters, the book doesn’t close when the story is over, wrapped up in a neat little bow. It closes whenever it’s ready. When mine does, I want to be okay.

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ACROSS

1. Creator, writer and star of I May Destroy You 2. Swift’s eight studio album 3. Netflix hit series, Tiger ______ 4. A state or situation of being alone 5. The process of developing or maturing physically, mentally, or spiritually 6. Infectious disease 7. Krasinski web series, with Across 16 and Across 22 8. Concern about and well-informed interest in a particular situation or development 9. Think deeply or carefully about 10. Netflix dating reality show, with Down 4 and Down 19 11. Jeopardy host 12. 46th President of the United States 13. Prominent social movement

DOWN

1. Los Angeles Lakers #8 and #24 2. Blinding _____ 3. Video conference software 4. Netflix dating reality show, with Across 10 and Down 19 5. Supreme Court justice 6. Black Panther 7. To undergo transformation, transition, or substitution 8. The process by which a legislative body initiates charges

against a public official for misconduct 9. The quality or state of being independent 10. CEO at Big Cat Rescue, from Across 3 11. Politician and civil rights activist, John _____ 12. Site of explosion, capital of Lebanon 13. Homicide insects 14. Goodbye Earl band new name

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Actor Stanley with viral video making a Negroni 49th Vice President of the United States Krasinski web series, with Across 7 and Across 22 92nd Academy Awards Best Picture Royals stepping back from senior duties, nickname Broadway musical released on Disney+ The action or process of adapting Super Bowl LIV halftime performer, with Down 22 Krasinski web series, with Across 7 and Across 16 Bilbo Baggins actor

Sweeper of Comedy Emmy Awards, _____ Creek Popular fermented bread during quarantine An epidemic of an infectious disease spread across a large region Winner of four main Grammy categories Netflix dating reality show, with Across 10 and Down 4 Swift’s ninth studio album Disney live-action remake Super Bowl LIV halftime performer, with Across 21 Cardi B & Megan Thee Stallion hit song

By: KIMBERLY STEWART

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17958.10 the world is different now... the birds don’t sing as loud the sun doesn’t shine as bright the colours are dull the scents aren’t the same this is a world without you one not worth living in It is what it is. It’s not fine - love

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By: Emma Marion

As I reflect on the past year, I can’t help but consider the gravity of the undoubted 2020 symbol: the mask. Everyone has had at least one mask in their possession (including anti maskers) since last year, whether it be reusable or medical PPE. We’ve all covered our faces, put one in our pockets, or tied it around our ears, etc. These masks were designed to keep us safe, and aid in lessening the spread of germs during these challenging times.

The discourse around masks has led to an intense divide in our communities and populations. We seem to be in a battle of anti maskers vs. the educated (sorry, not sorry). This controversial symbol has simultaneously created a war within society while trying its hardest to save lives. I never expected fabric to come between populations so severely, but alas, it’s always the little things. Truthfully, this ‘little thing’ deserves a wider range of discussion, rather than solely being used (or unused) as a tool for conflict. I do not intend to create yet another debate about masks and their function, but rather bring to light something I have been constantly thinking about: the littering of masks. The amount of masks littered around our cities and environments is unacceptable. The fact of the matter is masks are everywhere, and I don’t mean exclusively on our faces. They’re in our streets, scattered around our parks, stuck in gutters, and hiding within the snow and water. We’re facing yet another huge refusal of responsibility from citizens when it comes to properly disposing of waste. We live on such a beautiful planet, and we constantly treat it like trash. Our environment is not a trash can!! The influx of necessary mask usage is not a justification to litter more. In fact, shouldn’t we be wanting to keep our communal spaces cleaner given the circumstances? With a literal virus circulating, shouldn’t cleanliness and respect for other people’s space be in our top priorities? These questions should have obvious answers, but this last year has made it painfully clear just how selfish human nature can be.

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This photo series is a collection of discarded masks taken around the Calgary downtown/ Northwest area. It only took a couple of weeks to collect, while only capturing photos on natural walks. I could have spent hours outside collecting photo upon photo of these sad little masks, but I wanted the evidence of this photo series to remain as organic as possible. This is where these masks were left to live and wither. It hurts to acknowledge how this safety object has become a symbol of conflict, and an accessory in societal defiance to proper waste management. I did my best to dispose of the masks properly after photographing them, but some of them were challenging to save.

Unfortunately, I do not have a simple solution to this problem. If i did, I wouldn’t be venting in this zine, but rather celebrating a sustainability breakthrough. If i could leave one message to you, let it be this: Please be more conscious, and willing to adapt. Alone, we have one life and one planet, but together, we have evolution and a home. Life will continue to grow, as long as we allow a place for it to blossom. Small actions create big impacts, when done consistently. If I sound angry, it is because I am. Passion and anger are wonderful friends, and hopefully they can one day be friends with satisfaction and hope. I know there is no sign of utopia in sight, but I’d rather strive for utopia than settle for hell.

What about you?

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Poems Written In Quarantine

Knock Knock Knock knock Who’s there? No one. No one’s anywhere.

The worlds so empty, so cold, so bare.

We’ve all been locked inside, I need air!

How long has it been? It feels like months.

And not much has changed I only sneezed once!

It’s only been a short time, I don’t need to rhyme But the people stole our toilet paper, it feels like crime.

They all went crazy, isolated behind glass, Canceled all our games, everyone wears masks!

Written by Faith Marion

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It feels like an apocalypse, one I wish I could miss, I’m going mad in my house, I’ve befriended the mouse, My foods disappearing, i don’t know what I’m hearing, But I hope this is over soon, my guess is around June.

What am I anymore? Do you know what that means?

I’m a person, I have hopes and dreams, I want to sail the ocean, live in the sea, I want to climb a mountain, I want to be free, Nothing feels the same, things always change, But life’s gone insane, this feeling is strange, How do we go on knowing there’s nothing, You know what they say,w everyday holds something, Trapped in a house, it’s hard to find, we’ll get there, just keep a peace of mind.

Run To The moon Locked inside a room, what can you do Don’t wanna get sick, i wouldn’t touch you with a stick.

Let’s keep some distance, we shouldn’t need any assistance.

You stay over there, and I’ll be fine here.

I’ve gotten used to the “no one”, but I hope were almost done.

This isolation is getting old, and the weathers getting less cold.

I want to go outside, I think my brain might be fried.

I need some sunlight, even if it’s a bit bright.

Corona better be over soon, or I think I’m gonna run to the moon.

What Am I Anymore?

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CREATOR CORNER

With the March theme being reflection and growth, we wanted to showcase a creator who more recently launched their small business, and whose products bear a powerful amount of positive energy.

Introducing our Creator Corner feature: Mystica Curiosities & Candles!

(Or Mystica Curio, for short).

PRODUCTS: Mystica Curio products range from handmade candles, to curious collectibles to DIY candle & spell packs! Her candles are one of the main products offered, and with each homemade candle, there is a special intention added.

You can choose your intention, from choices such as: • protection • success & wealth • self love • divination & psychic awareness

We recently had the pleasure of meeting digitally with Natonya, the creator behind Mystica Curio, where we discussed her inspirations, products, and her thoughts on the Wicca culture trendiness. We fell in love with Natonyas charming personality, which only made our love grow more as we discovered more about her business origins and familial inspiration!

When creating Mystica Curio, Natonya knew she wanted the name to embody a magical and holistic essence. Her father had suggested using an Italian meaning for the name, based on their half italian heritage, and Natonya loved the idea.

With “Mystica” meaning “Magical” in Italian, and “Curio” symbolizing her love of all curious natures, Mystia Curio was born! Natonya had been making candles, collecting crystals, and experimenting with spells and natural remedies a couple years prior to beginning her business. She would often make candles with her mom in her free time, and experiment with different herbs and scents to find the perfect recipes.

Natonya says her mother is also very natural, and involved with earthly healing remedies, which let them to eventually make candles for Mystica Curio together! “It’s nice to spend time together, and it also makes the house smell really good!

And then we get to give those products to someone else and it’s a super fun process”. The amount of family support that goes into Mystica Curio is so beautiful, and the passion and love that goes into each product makes it that much more special.

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And you can choose your scent, from choices such as: • • • • • • • •

cinnamon eucalyptus sweet orange lime cedar lemon lavender rose.

The possibilities can be completely personalized, and each is made with extreme care for that particular customer! Natonya commented on her products, and said rather than stocking up with each candle, she likes to prepare each one as they are ordered so they are more fresh, and packed full of positive energy specific to who it will be going to! How beautiful is that? Mystica Curio supports local as best as they can!

All the herbs are bought from a Saskatoon local place, and they are working on collecting beeswax from a local friend to use for future candles! Each candle now is made of soy wax and packaged in up-cycled jars, making a unique look for each one!

The rise of Wicca culture on social media has allowed for a welcoming crowd for Mystica Curio, but that wasn’t always the case as Natonya was getting her start. Although she doesn’t label herself as Wiccan, but rather a believer in the Earth and its natural power, she has received backlash and disagreement from family members and other perspectives. Be it reasons of religion, misunderstanding, or preconceived notions of the natural work Natonya promotes, she always faces criticism with grace and open mindedness. Each negative remark is contradicted with her positive energy, and accepting nature. It is this accepting and loving nature of Natonya that will help her succeed in her creative passions, and we cant wait to see what comes next for her!

If you could say something to the people who might not accept or understand the work you do, what would you say?

“I don’t put down other peoples religions, I’m completely open minded to hearing other people POVs, in fact i welcome it. I’m embracing everything that god has given us, if we want to look at it that way. God has given us so many different great things on this earth, and it just depends on how we choose to use them. I do believe in some higher being, for sure. But there are so many negative things in this world, and i do not want to bring anything else like that into it. The thing I’ve focused my whole life on is positivity. I don’t want anyone to feel hurt or pain, I want you to be able to express yourself, love yourself, and build on your own strengths.”

What is your favorite product and what is your inspiration?

“Okay so I love weird stuff! I have this little vile with snake skin in it, and I think it’s really cool!

I love to have little things like that around! I want to start painting little boxes, with stones and feathers inside too. I find it things like that so aesthetically pleasing”. Natonya plans to explore more of the curiosities side of her business, and get creative with weird and natural collectibles. She is inspired by nature of all kinds. With every area she visits being so different, there’s lots of unique plants and curiosities to explore for future projects!

You can find Mystica Curiosities and Candles on Instagram and Facebook!

To see more of her products, to shop, or to inquire about any mystica curio questions you may have, reach out to Natonya @ _mystica curio __

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By: Emma Marion

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A reflection on working a retail job during the pandemic

I

wont lie, working in retail fucking sucks sometimes. I could write a nice sized list of great customers I’ve met, and pleasant experiences I’ve had, however, this is not one of those lists.

I consider myself a social person, but sometimes there’s nothing I hate more than people. I agree, i’m probably in the wrong profession, but you know the saying: you gotta do what you gotta do.

I’ve been working in a footwear/ apparel store in Calgary, Alberta, for about 3 years, with a lot of customer service experience to my name prior. In those years, I’ve met some lovely human beings, some odd characters, and some intense assholes.

However the last year has been unique. Every conversation that exists in our political and social climate, is translated into customer/ employee transactional small talk. The pandemic has inflated every uncomfortable situation employees are put into. Put nicely, Albertans can be awfully intense

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about their beliefs. As employees, we’re forced to watch people diminish our safety as they refuse to wear masks, hand sanitize, or keep their distance. We get questioned about our beliefs on the “fake virus” that the government and media is controlling regularly. We have to listen to comments about politics and social issues from people whose viewpoints may be harmful or differing from our own. The list goes on, and it continues to get more exhausting to deal with. I am well aware that these uncomfortable conversations can be used to spark intellectual discussion, and share knowledge, however my stance on the matters at hand could put me in a place that affects my job, livelihood, and wellbeing. I try to remain authentic to my word, but to be transparent with you, I feel like I’m holding a double edged sword a lot of the time. It’s not worth arguing with customers like this at my workplaces. Yet I refuse to stay silent in matters of injustice, rude remarks, or false information. I know where my heart is on the matter, and sometimes

I struggle finding the balance between personal and professional. I’m simply trying to help people find a pair of shoes that fit them, not debate with them on if Trump is a good person or not.

There’s this idea that customers have the right to say whatever they want, because of the common notion that “the customer is always right”. This phrase will haunt me till I’m dead, probably. If you have ever worked customer service, I’m sure you understand what I mean. This phrase and its meaning has quite frankly been abused by many customers. “The customer is always right” was originally used by Harry Gordon Selfridge in 1909, to encourage shopping at Selfridge Department stores. Selfridge used this frame of mind to convince customers that they would receive exceptional service by his employees, compared to his competitors. This phrase was designed to make customers feel special, which would increase the popularity and spending at the locations that promoted it, such as these Selfridge Department stores. With the power of capitalism, this phrase has become a common tactic in customer service policies, because happy customers= better sales.

Realistically, the customer is not always right. The phrase is not a literal description, but rather a symbol that no matter what the customer says or does, they deserve exceptional customer service because it’s good for business. I bring this to light not to reject the entirety of this saying, but rather suggest a terms of condition: customers should be treated with respect and excellent service, as long as its deserving. The amount of customers that equate “the customer is always right” with “I can do and say whatever I want”, is unacceptable.

Employees shouldn’t have to entertain customers ridiculous complaints and conversations, becuase they are being paid to stay respectful. We spend most of our time at these jobs, answering similar questions, learning all the information needed, and dealing with the same kinds of people daily.

We know what is right and wrong when it comes to the business we work at, as we’ve been trained for it. With trivial things like prices and returns,

customers always feel they know the right answer because its what they want. I’m sorry, but thats just not the case. Employees did not create the rules, but we studied them day after day after day. So yes, we know the correct answers to your questions and concerns, and no, we cannot change the rules simply because you demand it.

As I sit here, and reflect on the last year of my life, my primary memories are from my retail job and customers like these. I cant speak on behalf of every retail worker, but this pandemic has made retail life quite exhausting. I never know what kind of conversation I’m about to get into, and I find myself nervous to find out sometimes.

I don’t know how to solve this problem, and Im sorry that this reflection entry turned into a venting session. But can you blame me? If these customers could put themselves into my shoes, for just one day, maybe they would act differently.

Its funny, I help people find the perfect pair of shoes for a living, yet none of them seem to care about my shoes, aka my perspective. If i could say something to these people without considering my job or position, I would tell them be patient and considerate of other peoples ideas and space.

This year has been tough for numerous reasons, but taking your anger out on people who have no control over it is not going to solve your problems.

In a world that is more disconnected than ever, we only have few moments of socialization and conversation, and i don’t want to waste mine with people who cant respect me or others. Retail is a lot of things, as you can see, but hey, at least it’s not boring.

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STRETCH S P R AY By: Daniela Olivares

Trying times of a pandemic have forced us to re-imagine the boundaries of human contact, in turn questioning our modern culture of carelessness. This prosthetic device speculates what regaining our autonomy looks like based on sanitation and care for all. The prosthetic device adapts to any setting with its flexible and retractable handle. Designed to be continuously refillable, adaptive to the body and setting, and available for all.

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Multitudes

By: Shantelle Bron-Pereira

in another life I wrote you poetry about who we could be to each other but it only seemed important because I hadn’t learned to see my worth without binding it to somebody else

these days I look back on a time when I thought love could be sacrifice and nothing else.

I grieve for the girl I killed because you told me the multitudes she contained were too heavy for you.

I am the human equivalent of a shot in the dark, the by-product of being raised under stars, hard-earned lessons, and always reaching out for love because it never came easy even when it was supposed to. especially when it was supposed to. and that is heavy – the weight of who I am but I am still trying to forgive myself for believing it was better to destroy any part of it when you told me I was too much to love.

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BITTERSWEET ZINE MARCH ISSUE 2021