Bittersweet Zine: August 2021 Issue

ISSUE #4 ISSUE #4 ISSUE #4 ISSUE #4 ISS

AUG 2021 AUG 2021 AUG 2021 AUG 2021 AU

Kelley | IG: @thepolaroidproject25 Kelley is the mind and soul behind The Polaroid Project: a photo challenge using a Polaroid camera as the medium, where you take one photo everyday. Whether the day was good, or bad, you capture a moment from it, forever illustrated on this piece of film.

Kelley is on this journey for 365 days, and started posting the photos back in February 2021. A few photos are features in this issue of BSZ, but to see the complete collection be sure to follow @ thepolaroidproject25 on Instagram!

MEGAN | IG: @forest.ghouls Megan is a 21 year old student from the UK who creates collages using various images from old magazines, and quotes from songs and films. She is always creating and hopes that her artwork inspires others to create as well! The diversity of these collages never fails to leave us in awe! Her work is a magical experience, and you should check it out on her Instagram page ASAP!

ANACIA | IG: @anaciatheartist & @anaciiaa Meet Anacia! A Creative Director, Artist, YouTuber, Magazine Owner, Model, Ecofeminist, Art Witch, and Designer. A creative mind, with absolutely no limits! She loves to incorporate herself and her spirituality into all of her artwork, creations, and content. Her artwork is powerful, raw, colourful, and authentically her! Anacia is an inspiration to us all, and we hope you love her work as much as we do!

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FAITH | IG: @theawkwardpizza Introducing Faith! A lover of all things Pixar, drawing, yoga, and music. Faith is a 21 year old artist, who can usually be found analyzing Pixar films, playing her ukulele, or hanging out with her cute cat, Gracie. You can check out some of her poetry in our previous BSZ issues, or find her amazing Scratchboard art here in this issue of BSZ!

SIMRAN | IG: @word_dream__ Simran is a poet, writer, and an amateur guitarist! She is currently a Commerce student, in her graduation level, and is either usually writing or reading! A student by day and reader by night, Simran uses her free time in between to create brilliant and lovely poetry. Although she feels she is more of an introvert at times, her creative thoughts push her to find her extroverted side! Born into a family of readers, she grew up in the midst of books since childhood, and now she dreams and lives alongside these words: making magic through the alphabet, and sharing her art with the world!

TIA | IG: @healing.with.poetry & Twitter: @healwithpoetry Tia Wray has a BA in English and a MA in health psychology.

She turned to poetry as a way to process trauma therapy, and her themes have expanded into topics related to healing, grief, connection, and nature. She is a mother and a meditator, and currently lives in Västerås, Sweden. Her poetry grasped our attention in such a special way, and were confident it will grasp yours as well!

ators

AUG USS T AUGU

Stand out Son gs

1. LEMON BOY: BY CAVETOWN 2. EGGSEHLL: BY RUNNER 3. AMBORISA: BY ROSIE TUCKER 4. LEMONADE STAND: BY IDYLLIC 5. STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE: BY GOODIE BAG 6. CHAI TEA: BY AUDREY 7. CIGARETTES AND COFFEE: BY OTIS REDDING 8. PANCAKES FOR DINNER: BY LIZZY MCALPINE

P LAYLISSTT PLAYLI

You ever just want to skip work and go on a picnic?

Okay, okay, okay, hold on to that feeling. Thats the vibe I want you to have when listening to these songs.

Just a responsibility free day, your best buds by your side, a cliche red checkerboard blanket underneath you, and your grandmas vintage picnic basket revealing all the juicy and delicious snacks for you and your picnic pals.

Just a lovely day at the park.

Simple as that. No worries in the air, only good food, warm sunshine, and the lovely tunage of this playlist to entertain your ears. And the vibes don’t stop there: all these songs are titled after food, eating, taste, things you can eat, etc. I really went all out on the picnic theme, can’t you tell?

I dream of a day where this playlist is simply my reality.

In a world full of retail songs, car radios, sirens, and “will you please hold” music, this playlist genuinely fuels me.

Just like real fruit and food, it gives me the nutrition I need to keep going! Now, I agree, there may be more summer-y songs to include on a summer recap playlistbut that’s not the vibe for this guy (this guy being the playlist, lol). No, no, this guy (still the playlist, lol) is allllll about the unexpected. I hope they are songs you’ve never heard before, and I hope if you have heard them, that they feel new and refreshing!

Enjoy the tunes, and enjoy the zine! This issue is full of amazing creations made by brilliant minds, and its all packed into this delicious fruity and groovy theme. A true slice of something special!

C r e at e d b y E m m a M a r i o n

SWEDISH SUMMER Sun-streamed morning naps And two meals a day Because we slept so late (Unless ice cream and popsicles count) Constant wet, from sweat and attempts to cool down I spike your hair with a handful of water from the sink And let the extra dribble down your cheeks Red-cheeked sunscreen smell Shooing mosquito dance The windows and our feet Uncovered open bare Snap a picture Hours worth of dusk take us to a midnight sunset Idle idyllic summer here - @healing.with.poetry

AUGUST RAIN I should have gone out Not stayed inside all day I could have donned rainboots Bright red or yellow or purple I could have slipped them off And wandered with wet feet I could have watched the trickle Of water down leaves down trees I could have watched for others Maybe could have seen children In their laughing splashing discovery I could have cried Let loose all that needs to be freed And have it washed away In this August rain I would have been cold But I would have felt alive Instead I stayed inside

- healing.with.poetry

WORDS W ORDS FROM FROM THE TH HE CRETAOR CRET TAOR R

WORDS FROM THE CREATOR August Rain is the bitter and Swedish Summer is the sweet, so I thought I’d submit them both for Bittersweet! Swedish Summer is essentially a romanticized recap of this first summer I’ve spent in Sweden and August Rain is a specific moment where I felt a kind of bitter regret from missing out on all the wonderful opportunities summer provides. I wrote both these poems from a place of mindfulness and trying to be present with the happenings of life and my feelings.

@D.ART.PAGE

ScraTCHBoard art

GREEN APPLE

WORDS FROM THE CREATOR “This food series was inspired by a bad day. I was bored and stuck at home, and my sister was having a bad day too.

It felt like everything was just going wrong. I decided to try and create something, to maybe try and fix this bad day. I used to make scratch boards when I was in Highschool Art class, and for some reason that was the medium I picked up that day when I wanted to create. I like scratch board because its like sculpting. The art already exists under the surface, and all you have to do is reveal it with the right tools. I’m happy with this food series, and I hope you like them too.”

THE GREAT PUMPKIN

- Faith | IG: @theawkwardpizza

ALWAYS ONIONS

WO RD M RO S F

A RE E C TO R

- Megan I G : f o r e s t. g h o u l s

TH

T h i s c o l l a g e i s b u i lt u p o n the feeling of nostalgia f o r m o m e n t s t h at I ' m s t i l l e x p e r i e n c i n g - t ry i n g to see these moments through different eyes t o t ry a n d r e m e m b e r them as best I can. The i m a g e i s f r o m a N at i o n a l Geographic magazine from the 60's, and adds to the hazy nostalgic feeling of the words, which I first wrote in my journal during the summer of 2020. I hope people r e s o n at e w i t h t h e m !

@forest.ghouls

B u d g et s a n d B i n d e r s : A r e f l e c t i v e e s s ay o n b a c k to s c h o o l s h o p p i n g, fa m i ly i n c o m e , a n d f i tt i n g i n

By Emma MArion

I

t’s been a while since I went back-to-school shopping myself, but I remember all the feelings that came with it. I remember being particularly excited about new pens and notebooks, mostly because I’ve always loved having a handy-dandy notebook and pen nearby to catch my silly little ideas. I remember the first day of school, looking around at other kids’ binders, and notebooks, and seeing which of our classmates had the coolest ones. Remember those cool binders you could draw on with a special marker? Those were incredible! Each kid that had one of those knew they were using royal supplies that year. That binder was a social class signifier! It gave a certain status symbol to whichever kid had it, before we even knew what status symbols really were. School supplies are definitely a big part of back to school shopping, but something that seems to trump the intensity of what kind of pen and binder you have, is what brands you were wearing on your back. What kind of shoes did you have, where were your jeans from, and how much did they cost, etc. These were the topics that caused more of a rift in your social status than what kind of binder your math notes lived in.

School life was gravy if you were a kid who didn’t really know what money was, or worry about where it came from. If your parents handled all the things your classmates heavily suggested you needed, and bought you whatever the latest trendy item or brand was, then I don’t think you can fully understand this next bit.

There is a heavy, and exhausting feeling of not fitting in, that can be extremely tied to family income. As a kid, it’s not like we have jobs or

pockets full of dollar bills. I wasn’t one of those kids who was given a monthly allowance, or anything like that. Truth be told, none of my friends were those kinds of kids. I guess kids find comfort in other kids who are like them.

It’s not that my parents didn’t want to give me an allowance, or set money aside for my college fund. They just… couldn’t. My parents worked really hard to give me a great life, and I’m extremely thankful for the sacrifices they did make for me. I may not have seen the depth of it all at the time, but I see it now. Clear as day. My Mom in particular really made me feel special.

She would put some money aside for us around back to school time, and after getting us the basic essentials (notebooks, pencils, my one extra cool pen, etc), she would let us indulge our fantasies for a minute. We each got to pick one trendy/ expensive item that we would have for the school year. I remember in grade 8, I picked one of those classic Lulu Lemon hoodies. It was blue and white striped, and I wore the absolute shit out of that hoodie. Everyone was wearing them that year, and I just wanted to be like everyone else (for some reason). I wish now that I hadn’t done that. That 150$ could have been better spent on groceries for my family, or gas for my parents car. But instead, it went on my back. “Now I could finally fit in”, I thought to myself. Spoiler alert: still didn’t fit in.

When I was in grade 9, I remember begging my mom for a pair of new DC shoes. Don’t judge me, okay, I did what (I thought) I had to do. But I had already gotten my expensive item, and it just couldn’t be done that year. After my parents said no, I scrounged up all of my piggy bank money and bought those shoes. An extra hundred dollars donated to the “please like me” fund. And the thing is, it never worked. With my fresh pair of

DC’s and my year-old Lulu Lemon Hoodie, the ‘cool’ kids still never accepted me. The laughs at my old-new clothes were never meant in a kind way. It’s not like I’d go to school everyday waiting for them to like me, but I just hoped that one day one of them would say “nice shoes!” or “hey nice sweater!”. But it was never that. It was always my one piece of ‘cool’ clothing to their entire outfits of it. I found myself being jealous, and angry, for all the wrong reasons. Jealous that they had parents who could buy them whatever they wanted, without worry of what they would eat tomorrow. Angry that my parents couldn’t do the same for me. What a horrible thought to now type and say to myself all these years later. I know now, but I didn’t know then. I would get frustrated when we went to the thrift store and my mom would tell me to pick a few pieces of clothing I liked. How silly of me to get angry over that! But it didn’t stem from a true place of anger, but rather confusion on why my situation was so different from some of the kids I knew. I hope that makes sense.

Now, years later, I find myself in a weird situation.

I’m the one behind the cash register. I’m seeing parents spend hundreds of dollars on back to school clothing that their kid doesn’t even really like. They’ll wear them for a few months, and then want something new. I see that behaviour happen DAILY. Just yesterday I saw a 15 year old girl cry, because her mom wanted to compromise and buy her a pair of Vans shoes and a pair of Fila shoes, instead of the one pair of expensive Nike shoes that we didn’t have in her size. She literally cried in my store. I couldn’t believe it. Her mom was offering TWO pairs of shoes, instead of the ONE Nike pair we didn’t have. I instantly was brought back to grade 9. Begging for those DC shoes from my mom, and knowing that there was no way she was able to buy them for me that year.

Not because the store didn’t have my size, but because our family was literally poor. This 15 year old girl finally stopped crying long enough for her mom to convince her to buy the other shoes, and then I saw that family an hour later with a bag from Footlocker and a box of Nikes peeking

out. I don’t know this family, I don’t know their business, and I don’t want to judge based on my small experience with them. So I’m treating this interaction as a moment of reflection for myself. I’m glad I learned the lessons I did, even if they were hard. I’m glad I learned to Love and Appreciate thrift shops, and second hand shopping. I’m Thankful for the endless possibilities of unique and special clothing found at said thrift shops. I’ve been able to develop my own style and find something that is just mine. I’m Happy that I never ‘fit in’ with those cool kids from my school, and instead I found my own circle of inspiring, welcoming, and unique friends. All the things I love the most about my life now, are because my parents taught me these lessons. I guess, at the end of the day, coming from a poor-er household can humble you. It gets hard at points, absolutely, but at the end of the day we always had food on our table, clothes on our back, and love in our hearts. When I would laugh with my friends, or read my books, or even eat my lunch at school, it never once mattered what shoes I was wearing.

Not once.

So, consider this a thank you letter to my Mom, to the thrift store, and to those kids who never gave me a chance. You all helped me discover myself in many different ways. I wish good luck to all the kids out there who are like me, and to the ones who maybe don’t have a mom like mine, or thrift store access. It’s a tough world, but you’re tougher.

Remember that trends are constantly changing, and money shouldn’t be spent fueling someone else’s ideas of you. Live your life for you, and you only. Also, to that girl who cried in my store yesterday, say sorry to your mom or I’ll pour red wine on your new white shoes! :)

Evening Walk W e a t t i r e d i n e a c h o t h e r ’ s f av o r i t e c l o t h e s Feeling serenity by holding each other’s hand, Evening sky illuminating the word Away f r o m c o n c r e a t e j u n g l e Wa l k i n g u n d e r t h e l i g h t p i n k s k y.

We both surfing in sky chasing the moon light E v e n i n g wa l k w i t h y o u i s t h e o n ly d r e a m o f m i n e , Come with me I’ll show you infinite love of mine Your ups and downs are all mine Come out with me lets bloom in life.

S o u n d s o f c h i r p i n g b i r d , l e av e s a r e s way i n g L a u g h t e r f i l l e d w i t h j o y ; w i t h y o u e v e r y e v e n i n g wa l k m a d e m y d ay.

Unknown destination, occult route Evening is ebullient, feeling more relaxing after your sparkling smile, Making this moment exuberant venturesome.

Experiencing precious moment with you, our heart coming together No fear and no trouble when I’m with you Dancing under the moon light, creating fantasies and lost in you Wa l k t o g e t h e r l i k e t h i s e v e r y d ay, e v e r y e v e n i n g a n d f o r w h o l e l i f e .

S i m r a n Pat n i k | I G : W o r d_ d r ea m _ _

W o r d s f r o m t h e c r eato r

“ I h av e w r i t t e n p o e t r y f r o m m y o w n e x p e r i e n c e , b u t t h i s wa s s u c h a divine experience, which I never had b e f o r e . A n d t h a t f e e l i n g , I wa n t e d t o express through my words. That’s w h y I h av e w r i t t e n t h i s p o e m . T h i s i s the poem about that evening, when I found out what Love is? Love is t h e o n ly t h i n g i n t h e w o r l d t h a t cannot be defined. [Love] cannot be b o u g h t w i t h m o n e y. I b e l i e v e t h a t love is blind. Nothing can be seen in love. Love is a madness. For her, love is everywhere.”

W o r d s f r o m t h e c r eato r : “My Artwork each tell a story about life within nature, one that we can’t see through the naked eye. I tell the story of the beauty and essence of life, through colors and creativity. My goal is to use my voice to tell my view of the world through my art. I connect my art to my practice of witchcraft, as each element is a representation of life. Art is part of my connection to my breakthroughs and transformation of my life.”

A n a c i a | I G : a n a c i at h ea rt i s t

YOU'RE ON A BIKE RIDE AROUND TOWN FEELING CUTE. SUDENLY YOU GET A TEXT FROM YOUR BROTHER, YOUR FAMILY NEEDS YOU HOME URGENTLY. SO YOU SPEED OFF ON YOUR BIKE, ONLY TO NOTICE THAT SOMEONE HAS BEEN FOLLOWING YOU. WHAT DO THEY WANT?

IT'S A HOT SUMMER DAY AND YOU DECIDE TO SPEND IT AT YOUR LOCAL BEACH WITH YOUR FRIENDS. AS YOU STROLL ALONG THE SHORE YOU FEEL SOMETHING CARESS YOUR FEET. YOU GLANCE AT IT AND IT'S SHINING BLINDLY. YOU SWEAR YOU CAN HEAR A MELODY IN THE AIR. YOU REACH TO GRAB IT.

IT'S THAT TIME OF THE WEEK, GOT TO GET GROCERIES. YOU'RE GETTING CLOSE TO PAYING AND YOU NOTICE THERE'S A NEW CLERK, A RATHER HANDSOME ONE. YOU PAY AND GET TO YOUR CAR. WHEN REVIEWING YOUR RECEIPT YOU NOTICE THERE'S A PHONE NUMBER. YOU REMEMBER IS HTO GIRL SUMMER AND GRIN AS YOU TEXT THE NUMBER. YOU GET A REPLY: "HELP, 24 MCARTHUR DRIVE". WHAT COULD THIS MEAN?

IT'S THAT TIME OF THE WEEK, GOT TO GET GROCERIES. YOU'RE GETTING CLOSE TO PAYING AND YOU NOTICE THERE'S A NEW CLERK, A RATHER HANDSOME ONE. YOU PAY AND GET TO YOUR CAR. WHEN REVIEWING YOUR RECEIPT YOU NOTICE THERE'S A PHONE NUMBER. YOU REMEMBER IS HTO GIRL SUMMER AND GRIN AS YOU TEXT THE NUMBER. YOU GET A REPLY: "HELP, 24 MCARTHUR DRIVE". WHAT COULD THIS MEAN?

YOU TAKE A TRIP TO ITALY FOR THE SUMMER. WHEN YOU SUDDENLY FIND YOURSELF IN A PLACE YOU'VE SEEN HUNDREDS OF TIMES IN YOUR DREAMS. THE PERSON YOU ALWAYS SEE IN THOSE DREAMS IS THERE TOO, AND THEY SLOWLY TURN AND ASK "IS IT REALLY YOU?"

YOU WAKE UP AFTER THE WILDEST PARTY OF YOUR LIFE. YOU SEE YOUR FRIENDS ALL AROUND THE PLACE ALONG WITH THE WORST MES YOU'VE EVER SEEN. AFTER WAKING UP IT TURN OUT NO ONE REMEBERS WHO YOU ARE.

IN 20 WORDS OF LESS, WRITE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SCENE YOU CAN.

YOU'RE WATERING YOUR GARDEN TODAY FOR THE SECOND TIME. YOUR VEGGIES ARE COMING ALONG JUST BEAUTIFUL AND YOU DON'T WANT THEM TO BE LACKING ANYTHING. AS YOU REACH FOR YOUR LAST BUCKET OF WATER THE GROUND STARTS SHAKING A BIT AND SPLITTING IN HALF, SOMETHING EMERGES FROM WITHIN THE GROUND.

YOU'RE WATERING YOUR GARDEN TODAY FOR THE SECOND TIME. YOUR VEGGIES ARE COMING ALONG JUST BEAUTIFUL AND YOU DON'T WANT THEM TO BE LACKING ANYTHING. AS YOU REACH FOR YOUR LAST BUCKET OF WATER THE GROUND STARTS SHAKING A BIT AND SPLITTING IN HALF, SOMETHING EMERGES FROM WITHIN THE GROUND.

AUGUST WRITING PROMPTS

YOU'VE BEEN ALLERGIC TO BEES AS LONG AS YOU CAN REMEMBER. YOU'VE ALWAYS HAD PEOPLE PROTECTING YOU FROM THEM. TODAY ONE SLPS THROUGH AND LANDS ON YOUR SHOULDER. YOU HEAR A TINY VOICE SAY "YOUR MAJERSY, I'M AT YOUR SERVICE".

Me-Dieas: Media Ideas,

by Me, for you :)

by Emma Marion Instead of throwing 100 recommendations your way, I want to narrow it down!

One of each of these fantastic mediums for you to indulge yourself in. As Autumn creeps around the corner (here in North America, that is), it’s only a matter of time till we’re hiding away inside from the cold. Keep these recommendations in your back pocket, and enjoy them when you have a free moment, or just dive in now! Either way, they’re worth the time!

1 show from my summer…. Can you Hear me? (M’entends-tu?)

(2018) This show follows three friends, who all come from diverse and disadvantageous backgrounds. Troubled souls, who find each other and create their own safe space. Well, a safe *enough* space… for the most part. Life isn’t easy for this iconic trio of Ava, Caro, and Fabiola. That much is true. But they’re not soft either. The shit they’ve endured has only made them tougher.

However, not every problem thrown their way is handled with grace and class. A lot of the time, these issues are met with confusion, anger, and a series of waterfall problems. Isn’t that the way it goes for everyone? When you’re trying your best, and d life has other plans, it can be overwhelming and cause a lot off uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. You won’t want to misss out ou ut on how these Francophone angels handle the chaos of poverty, being a woman, and managing family, friends, and sometimes even strangers. I truly do recommend everyone watch this show.

It’s short, it’s insightful, and it makes your heart understand a perspective that can only be felt by being uncomfortable. I should mention, this show is in French. So if you understand French, great! If you don’t, turn those subtitles on, and dive into the world of Ava, Caro, and Fabiola.

TRIGGER WARNING: Sexual assault, drug and alcohol abuse Availabe to watch on Netflix

1b book ook ffrom my summer …. People we Meet on Vacation (2021) A llovely ovelyy llittle friends to lovers story. This book found its way hands at the best time; in a time where I was craving iinto nto myy h a little travel and adventure, and couldn’t quite get it myself. A time where I was missing my friends, and wanting to make new ones. A time where I was bored of everything else I was reading, writing, watching, or listening to, and craved inspiration. I found comfort between the words on these pages, and fell in love with these characters. They are imperfect, sweet, selfish, crazy, nerdy, and loving people. They live in a world where being together is a forced impossible reality; all the signs tell them no. But hey, maybe this time they don’t read the signs. Maybe this time, they let us read the book that was written about them instead. Thank you Emily Henry, for actually making me finish a book I picked up! I shall remember my adventures with Poppy and Alex forever!

If you’re needing a clever and sweet little read, I absolutely recommend this one.

1 movie from my summer …. Milkwater (2020) Alright, here we go! This film really caught me off guard. d.

I watched the trailer and thought “oh cool! A film about friendship and babies and drag queens!”, and while those pieces were in fact present, they were more complicated than first perceived. This film was engaging, relatable, raw, and bittersweet. Our main character, Milo, meets a middle aged gay man at a bar, and the most wonderful and interesting relationship blossoms from it. The two find themselves on a journey like no other, and just when things start to make sense, the surface starts to crack. This film is about impulse, pregnancy, and relationships: which may sound like a basic plot line, but truthfully this film really explores the boundaries of what impulsiveness and relationships mean. I don’t want to say too much about the plot, as I think this story is one you need to watch unfold for yourself. This film surprised me and left me thinking about it for days, and then weeks, and now here I am a couple of months later telling you about it.

Availabe to watch on Netflix

Words from the Creator It was the summer of creative rebirth. I began to tap into and encourage all the parts of me locked away when I was young. Those parts I was told didn’t matter, since it wouldn’t help me with college or getting a good job. Thankfully I came to the realization of how vital those parts are to making me feel whole. How it is worth every bit of effort to coax them out and create a flow.

Some days are better than others, some days I just don’t feel it.

But still I do it, I try.

Each and every day, I turn down the judgement and focus on the practice. As a recovering perfectionist, it’s all I can do.

Especially since a Polaroid is such a restricted medium. You can’t change it, you can’t edit it. It’s a magical moment captured in time, unable to exist again. Which is something you have to accept, something you can learn from, and something to use to grow into the creative spirit you yearn to be.

One a day, every day, for an entire year. Good or bad, doesn’t matter. It’s all about the practice. Which for me, has turned into a chase of the magic, because there is no other feeling like it. Once you’ve captured an appealing picture, one that sings to your soul, only to have to start again the next day.

Just focus on the practice. You might surprise yourself.

- Kelley | IG: @thepolaroidproject

JUNE 29, SCRAMBLED

JUNE 23, THE RAIN FELL UP T ODAY

AUG 7, BLOOM

JULY 18, WHY H OWDY DARLIN

JUNE 7, INTEREST IN EXPRESSI ON

JULY 10, HE THINKS I ’M COOLER THAN I AM

JUNE 9, THE AGE OF INN OCENCE

MAY 13, MY LOVE IS JUST A REMINDER, FIND Y OUR CENTER

AUG 4, MUDDY MAY 28,THE ONLY TRUTH I KN OW IS Y OU

JULY 1, TEMP ORARY RESIDENT

AUG 2021

ISSUE #4