11. Love Conjoined

(I) He lies Beside me “I love you” he says I lie beside him “I love you too” I say We love each other We “lie” together. He knows I am not there Never will be I died the day he left me. I know he’s not here Never will be His death made me this numb. I know he’s not with me Yet I feel him. I feel him like the air around me I feel him when I feel myself I believe he talks to me I believe he wants me I want him too. I believe he’s here even after he’s gone and taken my life away with him. (II) We were two souls Conjoined by birth At hearts! His sneeze tickled my nose When I moved, I gave him shivers We were made never to fall apart For my body gave blood to his heart. Bodies united But heart? One heart united the two We were happy. But the world would not bear it One syringe. One syringe Killed him And I, was born still. (III) Nine months together We knew not if we were lovers or siblings or spouses We were two lives Two lives supporting each other Reveling in one’s joys Grieving other’s pains. Two happy lives But the world would not bear the happiness One syringe Took his blood away My heart away. (IV) “The world outside is utopia, we’ll go there someday”, He said, as we lay in the dark round world, with water everywhere. He wanted to go out in the light Explore the bigger world (with shallow hearts) We could do that together Walking around with one heart. But, the world, This bright, enlightened world Could not bear us together One syringe Just one syringe Made us all alike, Made us two, heartless too. (V) Those living in the dark are not always dark on the inside; (those with hearts are not always benevolent) We were happy in the dark circle. One push towards the light, And we lost each other. Heart detached Bodies separated Veins blocked. Living “together”, was “utopic” Promises turned lies In this altered world Where lives kill lives to gain flesh. We were happy in our dark world The malicious hearts taught us the other lying. “I’d always stay with you”, he once said, He lied to me. “I’d always be with you”, I’d replied, I lied to him. Now, we lie together in the dark world again, This time, surrounded by earth, We love each other We lie together As people from the light, Send us back in the dark.

Kajal Bhatia

III Year