Very Much Wow | The Dogecoin Magazine | Fall 2014

VERYMUCHWOW

FALL 2014 | ISSUE 4

THE DOGECOIN MAGAZINE

COMMUNITY > TECH > ENTERTAINMENT > NEWS > HUMOR

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VERYMUCHWOW

w w w .V E RY M U C H W O W . c o m

“People say that Dogecoin is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough Doge, you can have a key made.” -Joan Rivershibe

Birdie Jaworski EDITOR

Donations help keep Very Much Wow alive! Our Dogecoin Address is: DQmDQT2GoqVZmXb18w27HS6oZecpf9p3Sa

All contributors, columnists, and artists are paid in cryptocurrency for their submissions to Very Much Wow. Want to write for VMW? Have art to share with VMW’s audience? Please contact: editor@verymuchwow.com

ARTWORK CREDITS All artwork in Very Much Wow is created by the artists credited beneath each piece. Other pieces are copyright Very Much Wow.

SHIBES LOVE FEEDBACK info@verymuchwow.com Published by: Very Much Wow, INC. Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA T 505 216 6187 © Very Much Wow, Inc. 2014. All material is strictly copyright and all rights are reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without the written permission of Very Much Wow is strictly forbidden. The greatest care has been taken to ensure the accuracy of information in this magazine at time of going to press, but we accept no responsibility for omissions or errors. Or fleas. We can’t help those.

Maria M.’s goat and gorgeous dyed yarn / photos by Birdie Jaworski

THE FUTURE OF DOGECOIN Two years ago, Maria M. fled the poverty of a Mexican border town for another kind of poverty in the United States. She day labors on a farm and attends ESL classes at a community college. Mary is lucky; although she is an illegal alien, she has been given a safe and comfortable place to live and enjoys meaningful work at the farm. Her employer is sympathetic to the needs of immigrants and works as an immigration advocate in a nonprofit organization. A trio of ewes pushes their way through a screen door into Maria’s kitchen each morning. Navajo-Churro were

04 >>>THEEDITOR {VMW}

brought to North America by the Spanish Conquistadors in the 16th century as a source of food and clothing for their armies. A hundred years later, Native Americans gathered flocks of Churros through trading and raids, resulting in the sheep becoming an important part of the Navajo economy and culture. Today, these sheep are still kept throughout New Mexico and have been embraced by farmers and ranchers of all cultures. Maria considers her tiny charges spoiled. “I love them,” Maria laughs. We speak in Spanish, with a scatter of English words

1 DOGE = 1 DOGE mixed in, a nod to our combined cultures. “These babies are spoiled to death. They have a bad habit of pushing the screen door open and coming in the kitchen. It’s okay now since I only have three of my own, but it might get crazy when I have more! I’m going to try shearing them myself this year.” Maria considers shepherding, spinning, and weaving dying arts. She hand-spins her wool without washing it, the rich lanolin coating each strand, in a traditional method called “spinning in the grease.” “Hand-spinning is important.” Maria’s voice gathers momentum, steel. “Hand shearing. These are dying arts. The people doing these things are getting up in years. I do a lot of hand-spun yarns. I’ve been solely spinning in the grease with unprepared fiber, so it has a lot of character. It makes a mess! It’s right off the animal; you end up with a lap full of crud, everything’s dirty, you’re dirty. Selling handspun yarn is my bread and butter. When I can get enough yarn accumulated, I can weave things.” Skeins of naturally-dyed yarn hang, drying in the sun, under Maria’s tiny cottage window. The wool is both delicate and hearty at once. The natural colors of her Churros create a surprisingly varied rainbow of blacks, grays, and whites. A rug rests on a wooden table, boldly woven by Maria in a tribal pattern mixing vibrant reds with the muted creams of dried summer soil. Maria sells her hand-spun yarns and woven crafts along with other immigrant craftswomen at a Sunday flea market. She has started attending a monthly group where women who are learning English and who craft get together to talk about cryptocurrency and how they can sell their goods for Dogecoin and Bitcoin. I met Maria on the campus of the community college, where I was handing out Dogecoin wallets to women taking ESL classes. I know that they and many other women like them, send money back their families in Latin America. It’s extremely difficult to send a bank transfer if you don’t have a bank account. Even if you do, it

isn’t worth the time, expense, and trouble if you only have a few dollars to send. These women put cash inside of a letter and send it across the border, but it doesn’t always reach their intended recipient. Cryptocurrency promises an end to such injustices, promises that we may level the playing field between banker and human being. Like Maria, many of the women I meet run small businesses out of their homes. They sell tamales, homemade sweet bread and hand-beaded jewelry in the halls. Watching them transact business out in public gave me the idea that perhaps Dogecoin could make a difference. One of the issues facing these women is that they don’t own computers or super smart phones. They can use the computer center at the college, but they are not able to download the official Dogecoin client. I started to organize meetings. I met with women in the ESL program and explained how to use Dogecoin. I gave them each a paper wallet loaded with Dogecoin. I am helping them to discover ways to sell their products for cryptocurrency; Albuquerque is a high tech town, and some folks sell produce for Bitcoin at the farmers markets around the city. I’m organizing a Spring 2015 class to teach other local women with language barriers How To Doge, but I am unsure of exactly what to advise, especially since their access to technology is limited. Not only is it limited in their situations, but also in the situations of their families back home. I believe that Doge can be transformative in these small economies, but technological barriers create a wall. Everyone is deserving of getting to the Moon, and I know that you smart shibes must have some fantastic ideas of how we can start integrating Doge in technologicallychallenged communities. If we can figure out these kinds of problems now, we will be able to integrate Dogecoin and other cryptocurrencies into every corner of society across the globe. But this doesn’t come without inherent problems. Cryptocurrencies are in their infancy {VMW} THEEDITOR <<< 05

THE FUTURE OF DOGECOIN and we, as a community, have important and possibly coin-changing political discussions ahead of us. What happens if financial regulatory agencies make pronouncements about what is and is not legal in a certain country? What happens if the US Congress passes legislation strictly regulating cryptocurrencies? When these discussions occur, we may find our community divided. Some may welcome the potential politicization of Doge, and some may not. The political discussions are inevitable. The recent Moolah scandal - along with other scams - will push these kinds of issues toward us much faster than they might have naturally arrived. Political discussion is necessary for any community, especially a financially-based one such as Doge, and shouldn’t be feared. Doge is a coin, as well as a state of mind and a wonderful and caring community. However, one can decide to approach such political diversity with an attitude of humility and careful attention, and a desire to both listen and share with respect, kindness, and not-alittle humor. After all, it isn’t political discussion

and differences that create a divide; it is angry responses to opposing viewpoints that create strain and unease. I believe that we are better than that, and we can enjoy the respectful sharing of our members’ thoughts and learn from one another through these difficult situations as well as through our marvelous ideas and projects. I would like to invite anyone working in the area of or thinking about solving the cryptocurrency remissions problem to submit an article for either Very Much Wow (if it is Dogecoin-centric) or our new sister publication ChainScape. The more minds working on these problems, the faster we will all be able to create a society better balanced in the areas of economy and equality. The future of Dogecoin isn’t 1 Doge = 1 Dollar. The future of Dogecoin is you, and the changes that you can affect and inspire in the world surrounding you.

- Birdie Robert McGrath sent me a 3-D printed Doge Rocketship! He created it using /u/espritex’s plans, which you may find at: http://www.thingiverse.com/thing:325098

I love it! To the Moon! {VMW} THEEDITOR <<< 07

FEATURES 04 Editorial On the future of Dogecoin 10 Columnists Meet our Fall team! 28 Special Report Free1000 on the AuXPoW debate 44 Play with Your Dogecoins Things to do with your Dogecoins and your Doge!

MUCH SCIENCE

COMMUNITY

42 ChainScape Introducing our sister publication

20 Interview VMW speaks with photographer Elena Gallegos

68 Dogemarket Review Market Analyst Helen Ensikat on the summer’s Dogemarket movements

22 GoodShibe GoodShibe on the future of Dogecoin

72 Shibemetrics “Very Much Doctor” Bob on the value of Dogecoin 98 Doge DNA Martha Shibewart shows how to isolate your Doge’s DNA

24 VMW in the Wild! Much photo! Such smile! 74 Art/Photo of the Month 78 A Shibe for All Seasons On Dogecoin queen Mumzie 92 Feature Creep and Doge Fulvio Gerardi on creeping technology 101 Blue Moon Cocktail Martha’s finest! 104 Community Pages Games, Games, Games

SO Table MUCH Contents

SO SILLY

ENTERTAINMENT

NEWS

66 Siege of Debt Mountain The battle map!

18 Treasure Hunt Win One Million Dogecoins!

76 Metafawkes Trains, crypto, and meh

80 Press Paws Jyro Blade reviews Dogeminer

12 News Briefs Foundation Speaks SuchList.com A Day Without Touch #DogeV8 Dogecoin Thuderclap

88 Unfiltered Thoughts Crowley’s recipe for crypto success 96 Doge After Dark Rants and Raves from community members

84 Watch Me Review Clay Michael Gillespie reviews The Rise and Rise of Bitcoin 86 Amaze So Listen Tom Boice reviews Georgy Watsky’s “All You Can Do” 94 Dogevelope Make an origami paper wallet

columnists - FALL/14

CLAYMICHAELGILLESPIE Clay is an amateur writer of novels, short stories, poems and comic book scripts. His focus is on public relations. He has created and implemented strategic plans for Goodwill Industries of Central Indiana, Asian American Alliance of Indiana, Martin Luther King Jr. Dream Team, Digital Publishing Studios and Ball State University’s Unified Student Media. clay@verymuchwow.com

HELENENSIKAT Helen is a small-time doge holder from Western Australia with a background in economics and corporate finance. This one time she saw an advertisement for a Very Much Wow columnist, and thought ‘Wow, what a career opportunity!’ helen@verymuchwow.com

JYROBLADE Jyro is a video game programmer working in the New York City indie game development scene. He has been making games since he was 14 and some of his first memories involve playing Tetris on a classic GameBoy. He became involved with Doge in February 2014. Jyro enjoys DJing UK hardcore, skateboarding, and playing competitive Magic: The Gathering. jyro@verymuchwow.com

GOODSHIBE GoodShibe is a passionate advocate for Dogecoin, a regular contributor to the /r/Dogecoin community and writer of the popular ‘Of Wolves and Weasels’ series – an archive of which can be found at goodshibe.com. goodshibe@verymuchwow.com

10 <<< VMWCOLUMNISTS {VMW}

FREE1000 Free1000 built his first computer in 1985. That’s how long he’s been in the computer business. He owns a Finance company and VR Concepts, a Virtual Reality Computer company. Originally from Seattle, he lives in New Jersey with his wife and four children. Free1000@verymuchwow.com

CROWLEY Crowley writes Very Much Wow’s ranton-crypto column. He is a 28 y/o medium skilled programmer, dad, and a strong supporter of free speech. He is also part of the development team for Myriad Coin. He enjoys writing rants regularly, although the people he rants about don’t enjoy it quite as much as he does.

VERYMUCHDOCTORBOB Very Much Doctor Bob, Professor of Shibemetrics, analyzes the Dogecoin community from a variety of interesting and doge-like angles.

TOMBOICE Tom Boice is a regular contributor to the cryptocurrency news service Cr y ptoCoinsNews.com, spearheading their weekly Dogecoin addition. Holding a B.A. in English Literature from the University of West Florida, Tom has a passion for all things music and loves analyzing song composition. He currently lives in Pensacola, FL with his wife and enjoys helping out Sean’s Outpost when possible. tom@verymuchwow.com

verymuchdoctorbob@verymuchwow. com

CARLISHIO2 Carlishio2 passed away just prior to this issue’s release. He was very much loved and is very much missed.

Many Words Such Info

A Day Without Touch Ebola Challenge Acception Dogecoin Donations A Day Without Touch is a solidarity challenge and fundraiser. By taking the Challenge, you will raise much needed money to help Doctors Without Borders (MSF) treat Ebola victims in West Africa while raising awareness of the way the disease parasitizes humanity by preying on our most uniquely human virtues.

• Ask for donations and thank everyone for their support. • Tap at least one other person to take the Challenge too. Who Gets the Money?

Funds raised through this campaign go to Doctors Without Borders/Médecins What is the Challenge? Sans Frontières (MSF), an independent international medical humanitarian Put simply, participants pledge to go for organization that delivers emergency as long as they can without direct skin-to-skin aid to people affected by armed conflict, contact with another person. The fundraiser epidemics, natural and man-made disasters, ends at the end of 2014. and exclusion from health care in more than 70 countries. MSF has been responding to How to Take the Challenge the Ebola outbreak in West Africa since March 2014 and has treated more Ebola • Email your friends and family to let them patients than any other aid organization. know you are taking the Challenge and More than 3,000 MSF staff members are to ask them to support your effort with working in the region, including some donations nearly 300 international staff. Money from • Start the Challenge (avoid skin-to-skin this fundraiser will be earmarked for Ebola contact with other people for as long as specifically. you can) • Keep your friends and family updated Join the challenge: throughout the Challenge and share your http://adaywithouttouch.org/ experience on this website and social media. • End the Challenge when you accidentally or intentionally have skin-to-skin contact with someone else • Flip a coin: The toss represent Ebola’s lethality. Heads you live, tails you die. (Be sure to share the outcome.) 12 >>>NEWSBRIEFS {VMW}

SuchList.com Adds New Features

Dogecoin Thunderclap Scheduled! Dogecoin community member DimiFW has organized a Thuderclap for Dogecoin’s first birthday on December 8th! Although the official party day is the 6th, the formal birth date will see a special message thundering across social media! Thunderclap is a tool that lets a message be heard when you and your friends say it together. Think of it as an “online flash mob.” Join a Thunderclap, and you and others will share the same message at the same time, spreading an idea through Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr. NASCAR Dogecar driver and reddit darling Josh Wise has pledged to participate in the campaign. The message to be Thuderclapped is, “Dogecoin celebrates its 1st birthday! Come party with us on /r/dogecoin :) #dogecoinbirthday,” along with a link to the Dogecoin subreddit. To date, 255 shibes have joined the pledge to spread the word, resulting in a social media blanket of over 250 thousand potential accounts!

In its continued quest to make Dogecoin commerce easy and accessible Suchlist.com have launched support for auction style listings. The user can now select his ad to be displayed as an auction and set things such as expiration time, reserve price, starting bid and minimum bid increments. After that users are free to place bids on the item. A user enters their maximum bid, and the system will automatically keep the actual bid as low as possible whilst meeting the seller’s auction criteria. The system will never raise a user’s bid above their set maximum. If a user is outbid by another user, they will be notified by email and are free to raise their maximum bid to stay in the race. A winning auction bid automatically registers a final deal between the You may join the Thunderclap here: two parties to enable feedback to be left. https://www.thunderclap.it/projects/17435 Also, the classified ads have received an overhaul and users are now able to select the style dogecoins-1st-birthday of classified ad they wish to publish. There are options catering to things users wish to sell, buy, give away or trade. All these options are filterable GOT NEWS? when searching. This includes selecting to view email only auctions, auctions closing soon etc. editor@verymuchwow.com Additionally, users can now easily grab the RSS feed of any search they make. Users can, in a with your news tips, few simple clicks, setup their rss client to notify press releases, them - for example when auctions of Steam photographs, and games with a highest bid lower than 10.000 Dogecoin gossip! Dogecoins, closing in one hour, exists. All these new features continue to be tweaked and improved, and user input is always welcome.

{VMW} NEWSBRIEFS <<< 13

The Dogecoin Foundation Comments on the NYDFS BitLicense The new Dogecoin Foundation has made its first statement after announcing the publication of its bylaws. In a post to the homepage of their website, the Board writes: Hello Shibes, Dogecoin sets itself apart from other digital currencies through its amazing, vibrant community made up of people from all walks of life. Our currency, which isn’t even a year old, has brought us all together and has helped us achieve amazing and fun things: sending disadvantaged athletes to the Olympics, helping ones in need, seeing Doge’s likeness whiz around the Talladega Speedway on national TV. One significant threat to the continued prosperity of digital currencies like Dogecoin and their immense potential for community building and action is the proposed NYDFS BitLicense regulation. In order to address this, the Dogecoin Foundation submitted comments to the NYDFS and its Superintendent, Benjamin Lawsky. In our comments, we focused on the potential for social good that digital currencies can unlock and offered our special perspective as a charitable nonprofit organisation to aid them in their deliberations and to make sure that the interests of non-profits are served. We believe that a reasonable degree of regulation is key to the future success 14 >>>NEWSBRIEFS {VMW}

of digital currencies and welcome Superintendent Lawsky’s inclusive approach and outreach towards the cryptocurrency community. We expect the NYDFS regulation to pave the way for regulation all around the world and if Lawsky continues his engagement with the community, then there is a good chance that the future will be bright for Dogecoin and other digital currencies. Board members are Felix von Drigalski, Jens Wiechers, Steven Hirschmann, Josh Mohland, and Debbie Ballard. The full text of the Board’s comments can be found at: http://foundation.dogecoin.com/ resources/20141021-Foundation-Re-DFS29-14-00015-P.pdf The Dogecoin Foundation’s website may be found at: http://www.dogecoin.com

Need something to read with that coffee?

verymuchwowsales.com

#DogeV8 - Jack LeBrocq finishes 10th in action-packed race! Photos courtesy Jack LeBrocq

{VMW} NEWSBRIEFS <<< 17

18 >>>TREASUREHUNT {VMW}

A Very Much Wow Treasure Hunt

Very Much Wow has virtually hidden a silver Shibe Mint Dogecoin along with a paper Dogecoin wallet somewhere in the world. The coin is safely hidden, and has been placed in a vintage World War II metal soldier’s box. The winning Dogecoin wallet public address is: DC4sNxaER9naRBWuAe4FgVRnS2XVZT7e18 This address, as you can see by checking the Dogechain, contains 1 Million Dogecoins! The first person to correctly identify the location of the treasure wins the Doge, the vintage box, and the silver Shibe Mint coin! WOW! Such Treasure! This is an online treasure hunt! The location of the box has been sealed in an envelope. You just need good deductive skills and the internet! Armchair Sherlock Shibes, get ready! Each week, starting on Monday, November 3rd, we will publish a clue on our website blog that points to the location of the treasure, until the prize is claimed! The full details of the contest will be announced with the first clue, including our escrow arrangements to assure our compliance!

{VMW} TREASUREHUNT <<< 19

Kiva at Chaco Canyon / Elena Gallegos

Under New Mexico Skies Birdie Jaworski interviews photographer and new Dogecoin user Elena Gallegos The sound of the shutter surprises a nesting sparrow. Elena Gallegos points her camera at what seems to be nothing - a wisp of dried sweetgrass, a dusty stone, the crack between two slabs of concrete. She tries to steady her hands. Click. Click. The sparrow flits from one branch to another, curious, aware. “It’s damned difficult,” Elena sighs. Diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease, a degenerative disorder of the central nervous system that often impairs the sufferer’s motor skills and speech, she retired from her thirty-year career as an elementary school teacher at the age of 58, and began taking photographs. 20 >>>ELENAGALLEGOS {VMW}

“I decided enough was enough. If I was only going to have a few good years of fine motor skills left, I was going to darn well enjoy them.” Elena fit the lens cover over her Nikon. “All of my life, I felt like an artist. All of my life. I taught my students to follow their dreams, and I realized one day I wasn’t taking my own advice. I’m just glad my husband, Ray, got to see my photographs before he passed away.” Elena shoots the forgotten places, the quiet space between one visual treat and the next. She uses two cameras - both purchased at yard sales - a simple digital camera with a good lens, and an old-school Nikon 35 mm. She walks the alleys of Albuquerque in

ELENA GALLEGOS the dusky hour before sunset, searching for inspiration, for a slice of experience no one has yet dared to catalogue. “Black and white and gray. That’s how I see the world. I use black and white film, or take digital shots and reduce them to grayscale on my computer,” Elena explains. “I enjoy spending time outdoors. Since Ray passed and I moved to Albuquerque, nature has become my new husband.” A collection of clouds wafts over the Sandias in one of Elena’s photographs, giving unexpected motion to the static land. In another, her lens peeks through a decaying door in ghost town Loma Parda, allowing the viewer to enter a still sanctuary of stone and memory. Her pieces celebrate the often rough landscape of New Mexico, and capture the state’s dream-like consciousness. “Too many people think they have to be ‘good’ to be an artist. I’m living proof you don’t,” Elena laughs. “To be a photographer, or a painter, or a singer, you just have to do what you love. Who cares if anyone sees what you see in it? I’m losing my hands, little by little. In another year I won’t be able to take these photographs. I’d rather take bad photographs today than wish I had taken them tomorrow.” Elena plans to print a collection of black and white New Mexican sky postcards from her growing body of work. Her first gallery show occurred several months ago in her hometown of Las Cruces, where a series of ten photographs lined the walls of a hip internet cafe. A young man walked up and asked if he could buy a photograph. For Dogecoin. She laughed and said no, but remembered the funny dog on the man’s shirt and did an internet search a few days later. “You can teach an old dog new tricks. You can. I learned that the world didn’t stop when my body decided to shift and when my

husband died. I don’t understand Dogecoin or Bitcoin or what have you. But I am learning.” Elena leans back on a city park bench and points at a group of teenagers skateboarding along the sidewalk. “They are the ones who will use Dogecoin in the future,” she says. I’m going to organize another show and this time sell my photographs for Dogecoins and Bitcoins. It might get some publicity in the paper. I hope that young man shows up. I’d like to thank him and give him a photograph.” A cloud of dust escaped from the wheels of a skateboarder and drifted toward us. “You can be anything you want to be, and do anything you want to do. It doesn’t matter how young or how old you are. It doesn’t matter how good you think you might be at something.” Elena pushes a stray hair out of her eyes, adding it to the lopsided gray pile on top of her head. “I said yes to my dream three years ago, and now I’ve had one show, and will soon sell photographs for Dogecoins. It’s small potatoes, but that’s what life is. A big bag of potatoes, if you’re smart about it.” Interested art collectors may contact Elena Gallegos regarding her photographs at: photographsbyelena@gmail.com Tip Elena: DChSUxfWNA57cEinyWr5AdqfrDfrqzKhU3

{VMW} ELENAGALLEGOS <<< 21

The Future of Dogecoin The Future of Dogecoin is, well, it depends entirely on who you ask, really. When we were created, Jackson Palmer and Billy Markus imagined Dogecoin as having the lifespan of about a year or so - because that’s, essentially, how long memes seem to live for before ‘the joke gets old.’ Of course, the twist here is that those who built our coin never expected our silly little dog-on-a-coin, or the community at the heart of it, to take off and thrive in the way that it has. Which leaves us in an interesting situation because, you see, there’s never been a crypto-coin created with an ‘expiration date’ in mind before. Right now? As our mining rewards continue to halve and our valuation continues to fall? It looks dicey; I won’t deny it. But to listen to some of our detractors, those who are already gleefully declaring us ‘dead’? Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. See, one of the main reasons that Dogecoin is in this difficult position is that our coin was designed to have 100 Billion coins mined in its first year of existence, what we call a period of 22 <<< GOODSHIBE {VMW}

‘hyperinflation.’ The simple reality is that in a world ruled by supply and demand, flooding the market with 100 Billion of, well, anything, makes it pretty hard to ascribe a value to it. But, to try and help you wrap your head around it, 1 Billion pennies, stacked end to end is about as wide and as high and as long as five school buses parked in a row. And then, if you take that concept and multiply by 100 you could lay out a ‘carpet’ of pennies that covers over 14 square miles - over half the size of Manhattan Island, which is 22 square miles. Simply put, the fact that Dogecoin a seven-month-old, niche, cryptocurrency with a microscopic user-base (in comparison to, well, pennies) - has any value at all, even now, is somewhat remarkable. If you include all of the fantastic accomplishments that we’ve already made together, the positive change that we’ve brought forth in the world - all thanks to a silly Dog on a coin - there’s even more of which to be proud.

GOODSHIBE The silver lining to our low valuation is that Dogecoin is very easy to share. Thanks to our now-famous ‘tipping’ culture, our DOGEs have a remarkably high distribution compared to a vast array of other altcoins. Which, incidentally, if you’re trying to kickstart a new digital currency, having a high - and growing - distribution is a very good thing. The more people you have who own and use and share and trade those coins… the better off that currency will be. For all the doom and gloom that gets pushed our way these days, by those looking down their noses at our ‘joke’ coin, the thing that they’re forgetting to talk about is what comes after. What Dogecoin could look like after we’ve survived past our intended ‘expiration date’. You see, with every halving of our reward structure, we’re creating fewer and fewer Dogecoins, meaning that, more and more, the coins that are floating out there on the exchanges, that are being traded and sold, are ‘old’ coins. Once our first year is up and our inflation drops by a whopping 95% of it’s original rate; once we’re adding a comparatively paltry 5 Billion coins per year to the network - at a regular, stable, predictable pace - then we can start to see an element of supply and demand take over. Now, of course, a great deal of

what I’ve just described above relies on having a vast majority of the coins that are currently being sold on exchanges to be bought - which will rely on us expanding our Dogeconomy. But the potential is there. A killer app, a burgeoning economy, a healthy and vibrant tipping community - no one’s sure what it will take, what exactly will flip that switch. What is the future of Dogecoin? The truth is that it is, and has always been, in our hands. We’re building it, now, together, each and every day. Dogecoin goes where we want it. If we want it bad enough.

Tip GoodShibe: DH6hKwqsKuDDy3S9jES5VDJfLdyJgY1j7E

{VMW} GOODSHIBE <<< 23

IN Roswell, New Mexico

VMW

E H T doge Hacka

WILD

Can YOU identify the Dogecoin celebrities?! {VMW} VMWINTHEWILD <<< 25

VMW in the FabLab with a 3-D printer, thanks to Super Shibe Robert McGrath! See his 3-D doge creation, along with a link to the artist’s file, in our Editorial this issue!

VMW IN THE WILD

WOW

{VMW} VMWINTHEWILD <<< 27

SPECIAL REPORT

28 >>> SPECIALREPORT {VMW}

MINING DOGECOIN What Doge Did Over The Summer This summer, Dogecoin reached a crisis point. Its mining hashrate was dropping at an alarming rate, making the coin vulnerable to a 51% attack, and the community knew that something needed to happen. What could the community and developers do in order to support our coin and make sure that it would have a healthy future? We’re still debating about these issues, but our core development team decided to move forward with auxiliary proof-of-work (AuXPoW), and implemented a hard fork late this summer. Merged mining was first discussed by Bitcoin creator Satoshi Nakamoto. In merged mining, one coin’s block chain allows miners to use solutions found mining another coin’s block chain. The dominant blockchain is called the parent block chain, and the “hitchhiker” is called the auxiliary block chain. The parent protocol does not require any modifications, but the auxiliary protocol needs to make a hard fork. In our community’s situation, Litecoin is the parent protocol, and Dogecoin is the auxiliary protocol. AuXPoW sounds more complicated than it is. A hash is a value that is computed from a base input number using a hashing algorithm. Essentially, the hash value is a summary of the original value. The important thing about a hash value is that it is nearly impossible to derive the original input number without knowing

the data used to create the hash value. If the miner solves the hash at Litecoin’s difficulty, the block is published as usual throughout that network. If the miner instead solves the hash at Dogecoin’s difficulty, the block can be redeemed and published on the Dogechain instead. The coins and their communities remain entirely separate, linked only through a technical aspect of mining. Since the hard fork, Dogecoin’s hashrate has increased. Another implementation that occurred over the summer was the addition of “Dogeparty.” We will cover Dogeparty and similary processes in our new publication, ChainScape. Our mining columnist, Free1000, collected the best parts of the community’s discussions regarding merged mining. We hope you enjoy the look back!

{VMW} SPECIALREPORT <<< 29

Today we are roughly five months until our main mining of Dogecoin stops. As most of you know, sometime in January 2015, our regular mining will cease to exist. We will hit our final block at 600000. At that point, we go into our deflationary mode of mining 10K blocks. Just try to give that some personal context to help you see the significance of the change, I have a 26Mh/s mining rig presently. I mine about 40000 Ð per day. This is worth around $9 USD. My electric bill for the rig is about $1.45 USD per day. When we move to 10K blocks, I will earn 5000 Ð per day or $1.45 USD. So, come January, I will be mining just enough coins to pay for the electricity.This doesn’t bother me personally, but it will bother the majority 30 >>> SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW}

of our community, assuming the price stays where it is. So what is the biggest problem facing us as we go into the next five months? It is declining hashrate. So let’s look at what’s been going on. Charlie Lee, founder of Litecoin had the following to say: “First of all, let me apologize in advance if anything I say offends people or if I am not very nice. I am stating my opinions and don’t like to sugar coat things. So it might be a bit jarring when compared to typical shibes you see around here. :) The last time I talked to the Dogecoin dev team, they were still trying to figure out what they wanted to do. And Jackson said that he would wait for 2 more halvings before

considering merged mining. Well it’s been 2 halvings, and the Dogecoin hashrate has behaved pretty much as I expected : LTC-600Gh/s Dogecoin -50Gh/s When I did my merged mining AMA, the dogecoin hashrate was about ½ of litecoin’s hashrate. Today, the hashrate is 1/15 of litecoin’s. Pretty much all the ASIC hashrate went to Litecoin, which I warned would happen. The Dogecoin’s network security is in danger of being attacked. The top 3 Litecoin pools can easily pull off a 51% attack on the Dogecoin network. In a few weeks, the top 6 Litecoin pools can easily do it. A Scrypt ASIC farm can decide that it wants to have some fun. The Dogecoin network hashrate is about

t a e r G AuxPoW Debate e

Th

45 ghash/s. So as an example, a 50 ghash/s farm can easily 51% it. Here’s the earning ability of 50 ghash/s. It makes about $20500 per day. Let’s say it takes about 30 minutes to pull off this attack... that’s 30 Dogecoin confirmations. The attacker loses about $430 if he stops mining Litecoin for an hour. They could try to attack one of the top Dogecoin exchanges and try to steal 0.7 bitcoins to make it worth their time. Or they can double spend a lifetime subscription to Hustler.com , which is worth about $500. Or maybe they just don’t like Dogecoin. And it only costs them $430! Dogecoin’s network security is worth only $430. So what can you do? Honestly, I’m not sure merged mining is a viable option anymore, as it is becoming less and less viable with each passing day. Merged mining was the best option in April, when I first proposed it. At that time, if merged mining was implemented, almost every single Litecoin and Dogecoin pool will switch to do merged mining right away, because adding merged mining of Dogecoin would increase their mining output by 50%! Today, adding merged mining will only increase earnings by 6%. It’s hard to say how many pools will switch. Some might think it’s not worth their time. So it would take a big PR push to make this work. You’re now left with a hard choice: • Don’t do anything and hope • Do merged mining and try to convince all the pools to do it • Switch to another algorithm, and hope you can compete better against other GPU mined coins • Switch to proof of stake, and accept all the problems that come with that. I think the dev team needs to do something soon.”

Now, here is a response from /u/lleti, a former mod on the Dogecoin subreddit: “There are a few things in this post that I’d like to tackle head-on; but first and foremost, I would like to talk about how a developer actually influences a coin’s economy. Firstly; one of the most touted mistakes that Dogecoin has made, was actually in forking off LTC’s codebase, and not the BTC codebase. This is because the LTC codebase is horrifically maintained; whereas BTC actually receives some attention. But we must remember that Doge started as a joke; and for a joke, it would’ve made no sense to fork from BTC, and then change the PoW to scrypt. It would just add needless time to “setting up the joke”. The quickest route at the time, was just fork LTC. Since then, the devs have actually been implementing the various bug fixes and changes contained within the BTC codebase - noting that the LTC devs couldn’t even {VMW} SHIBE IN THE MINES <<< 31

Mining Dogecoin

create their own electrum wallet. In contrast, the Doge community had an electrum wallet created within a few days of Doge taking off. Outside of the core development team - of which Doge, in my opinion, has a far more experienced and dedicated core of volunteers, Doge also has such a massive community working on their own projects, that our overall Dev presence absolutely dwarfs that of the LTC community. So, if Doge has such a huge Dev presence, why isn’t our coin gaining value and momentum at a more rapid rate than LTC? Well, put simply enough - as I’ve said, active and smart devs do not control the price of a coin. The most significant thing a coin can offer, to me, is something unique at its inception. All of the current large coins had something unique to offer at their launch and many are used for differing purposes as a result. Currently, we’ve got; • BTC: The first of its kind. The gold standard. Everything about BTC was unique at launch. Great Dev team. • LTC: Forked to scrypt. • DRK: Forked to X11, Anonymized Transactions, excellent dev team - in my opinion, what LTC should have been. • Vericoin: PoW/PoS hybrid (not entirely 32 >>> SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW}

unique) - but smart enough to know that BTC is king; and implemented Veribit, in order to make exchanging your coins to BTC a simple and fast process. • Dogecoin: huge community following, highly active dev team. Now, something important to note here, is the dev teams I spoke about above; and in being blunt, the point I’m trying to get across is, only a particularly bad dev, would blame a coin’s hashrate on another dev. The fact that Doge, during its peak, overtook LTC for hashrate, is a testament to both how strong the Doge community is, alongside how weak LTC can be at its core - look at all the other sha256 coins for example. Never before has a sha256 coin came out of nowhere, and overtaken BTC for hashpower. None ever came anywhere near. For a coin claiming to be the “silver standard”, the hashrate is divided out far more than sha256 has ever been. In being so bold as to state “it’s the devs fault”, in a public setting, is simply creating FUD in a best case scenario. Yes, Doge will never match LTC for hashrate - it’s astonishing, and again a large fault of LTC that we were capable of even surpassing it at one point. And again, only a claim that a particularly bad developer would ever accuse another

AuxPoW Debate of. Scrypt, is an algorithm that was handled poorly. Both DarkCoin and DogeCoin in particular, represent to me what a successful coin should pose - strong communities, active development teams, and the all-important step of attracting merchants. LTC right now, is hoarded - by people hoping another BTC-style spike will happen. And I can’t blame them either; even I have a few hundred LTC stashed away, in the hopes that they’ll be worth money at some point. But even with the arrival of ASICs, this doesn’t seem to be happening; LTC has plummeted from $31/coin to $8/coin, while Doge has plummeted from $0.0018/coin to $0.00026/ coin, over the past 6 months. LTC is worth around 25% of its peak value, while Doge is worth around 14% of its peak value. Yes, these are both horrible cases - ours more so than LTC’s, but I think at this point we have proven that following the advice of LTC will in absolutely no way help us. The fact that LTC still have a scrypt coin in Doge, which did not completely die during the crash over the last few months, is again a testament to ourselves - as currently, there is nothing in scrypt that is attracting anybody new, bar the current arms race for ASICs; and as someone who has ceased selling ASICs due to the current market climate (an increasingly impossible ROI, which manufacturers are taking massive advantage of by lowering the price greater than the ROI on a weekly basis), I can assure you that only the manufacturers are currently benefiting from that.” This is the response of /u/langer_hans, our head core developer: “It guarantees nothing. It would be a “try and see” kind of solution, just like others are.” This is a response of Ross Nicoll, another Dogecoin developer: “I find the list interesting; I’d disagree,

but whether I disagree isn’t really important, because the perception is probably more important than the reality. We basically have multiple leadership chains (in alphabetical order): • Community/social • Economic • Exchanges, merchants and services • Mining • Technical (split into core & security) Each group interacts with each other, but are generally functionally independent, and I think you’ll find it easier if you consider them independent groups. For example you’ve put miners at the top, but IMHO they don’t lead, however their efforts keep the coin moving. I know (and I hope this is reasonably public now) Mohland wants merged mining; if he could tell the devs what to do, as the list above suggests, we’d be there already. Moolah I’ll admit gets a lot of dev attention, but he gets it because he talks to us, and is also technical. Moderators shape and direct the reddit community, but there are significant other communities out there too. Does that help at all? I may have in fact just confused things further. Anyway; the devs take our cue from Langerhans, because bottom line he’ll be the one to have to deal with it if the decision is wrong. You persuade him of a choice, and I’m happy to follow it, and I believe similar to Patrick. I have major reservations about X11 (which looks like a house of cards to me), but apart from that I’m happy to accept most suggested options. Since we sat down and decided PoS was looking more like a good idea/inevitability, Blackcoin has continued to slide and Vericoin exploded, which fairly badly undermines that idea, but hey, you get the boss to sign off on it, I’ll do it. No option is good, however, we just change risks. Stick as-is and hopefully we’ll make it to 600k without being 51%’d, and from there we can build back up. Merged-mine and we might get more

SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW} <<<33

Mining Dogecoin hashpower, or we might struggle to attract Litecoin miners. Change algorithm and we may never recover our miners. Switch to PoS and we expose ourselves to risks from exchanges instead of mining pools. PoS based fork resolution’s definitely an idea I’ve toyed with, but I’d want to simulate to see if it actually helps. The other thing that occurred, which will make the purists scream, is to give exchanges & merchants tools with which to reject a hostile fork entirely, and hangtight while the mining pools realise they’re now mining functionally useless coins. Mostly we’re working on stability and pushing for adoption to drive demand and therefore bring the price up to a level where mining is more sustainable. We’re in a slightly weirder position because we’re a coin that depends heavily on its communities, and we lose some of our identity if we merge mine. Specifically, mining pools are a big part of the community for some people, and many would be unable to compete effectively with the existing Litecoin pools. That said, I know we’ve lost a number of pools already simply from the mining rewards, which makes that less of a concern. We’d also risk trouble if any major technical issues arose in Litecoin later on, but that’s a very long term concern.” This from Billy Markus, one of Ðogecoin’s two co-founders:

34 >>> SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW}

“I’d like to first say that this is not a call for dev action, it is a call for community action. I am no longer a dev for dogecoin and the dev team is not currently in favor of implementing auxpow. I am making this post because I want to help set the framework for future discussion on this topic. I’d like us to look at and discuss auxpow from a different perspective. First, let’s stop shooting the messenger. We are better than that. I think, especially in the dogecoin community, we certainly should recognize that intention of something is much different than its merit - we all know the story of the original intention of dogecoin versus where it has gone. Let’s stop discussing the intention of those bringing up the idea. Let’s discuss the idea. Personally, I would like the security of dogecoin to not be tied to its current USD value. In a PoW system, this is a direct correlation. The reason this is so heavily problematic is it the value is entirely perception - what people feel it is worth, what they believe it will be worth in the future. This can spiral out of control when circular reasoning is prevalent (hash rate is low because value is low because hash rate is low because...). Security will always be an issue in crypto currency. No perfect system for decentralization has been invented - PoW isn’t perfect or perfectly decentralized (mining pools, power consumption), PoS isn’t perfect or

AuxPoW Debate

perfectly decentralized (exchanges, centralized checkpointing). PoW is more battle tested and understood. PoS has positive points as well. If dogecoin is to succeed, it should be from its merit, not from its current value. The paramount foundation for success is a secure platform. That is not the recipe for success, but it is a requirement. Regarding auxpow, instead of looking at it like “merge mining with litecoin”, let’s look at it like this. If you are a scrypt miner, an auxpow enabled coin will allow you to help secure it while mining any other coin of higher difficulty. In compensation for helping secure the coin you gain some of its tokens. In that way, if dogecoin was auxpow enabled, it is saying this: If you help secure my network, you will get some dogecoins. If you mine scrypt, you can help secure my network without having to worry about losing profit. Thank you for helping securing my network, here is some dogecoin for this. That’s how we should look at mining in a proof of work system. Dogecoin won’t release the same amount of coins it has already released in 7 months for another 15 years - I think we can double the user base of dogecoin in that time, and if we can’t in 15 years then it’s pretty safe to say it is a failed project. 15 years is a long time. Dialup

internet like AOL was pretty big 15 years ago... But I digress. The economy of dogecoin going forward isn’t going to be based on the mining rewards, considering the amount of coins already released. We will need to shift focus to the product and its economy. That is already a huge challenge, but one with merit. The foundation of that is a secure platform. I think we should take seriously any proposals that help the security of our coin and not let pride and tribalism get in the way. We should be looking at the merits and shortfalls of all potential solutions, with security being the absolute most important piece. The dev team is doing this and I am behind them. I’d like the community to consider this as well. I’d like our discussions of auxpow to more accurately reflect what it is, what it means, and what it does. I would guess most of the money going to cryptocoins is from people trying to get rich quick. When they don’t get rich quick with one coin they jump to another, making price affect price, and since price affects security and security affects price in a PoW system, there is spiraling. Dogecoin’s niche is it’s friendly, charitable community and micro transactions. Focus on that and the rest will come. Focus on {VMW} SHIBE OF THE MONTH <<<35

Mining Dogecoin price and the community will just join the rat race of every other altcoin, continually getting pumped and dumped until enough people have been burned that they jump to the next pump and dump. I find that game extraordinarily boring. I’d like to see Dogecoin get its value by actually solving a real problem, and not just a haven for market manipulation like other cryptocoins.” This from Jackson Palmer, our other Ðogecoin co-founder: “It is definitely a challenge that dogecoin (and all current-gen crypto currencies) will face in the future. As we discussed recently, it’s kind of a sad reality that people are purely profit driven and these decentralized networks we’ve built are reliant on profit-mongers to power and secure their viability. I’m very concerned about the impact of centralized mining and reliance on transaction fees could hold for bitcoin as it becomes less enticing to mine – really, the network can be held at ransom to attach hefty transaction fees if the mining pools are cherry picking as they create blocks. At the end of the day, I think the viability of cryptocurrency really hinges on a move away from PoW-based mining to something new and innovative that doesn’t just stimulate an arms race and put all the power back into the hands of the fiat-wealthy. I don’t have a solution unfortunately, but hopefully someone will find one and bring about a new generation of digital currencies in the coming five to ten years. That being said, cryptocurrency as a space is very unpredictable so it wouldn’t surprise me at all if dogecoin beats the odds and overcomes these challenges in some weird, wacky way. It’s in the community’s hands, and they’re certainly passionate about seeing it 36 >>> SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW}

reach the moon, as am I.” And finally this announcement on August 3,2014 from/u/langer_hans, our lead core developer: “Today marks an important day in the history of Dogecoin. We are here to announce that we will enable the Dogecoin blockchain to accept auxiliary proof of work from other Scrypt chains. As you all know, we’ve been looking into a lot of options. AuxPoW has been on the table for quite some time now and has been recently again discussed at length. We have also discussed many other options, some of them which are still highly theoretical, or just deemed to be in Alpha state. We didn’t see them as viable for that exact reason. AuxPoW has been around in the crypto space for quite a while now. Our topmost priority has always been to provide a stable platform for the currency and its services and of course its users. We hope that with AuxPoW we can achieve that in a better way than what it currently is like. Our hashrate has been on a decline and we hope that we can gain more of it with the acceptance of proof of work from other chains. Yes, this does mean that we are going to fork. The exact switchover is yet to be determined but will happen sooner than later. This post is here to announce it early enough for everyone to prepare for the update. The code is currently in the late testing stage and we are working on ironing out the last small issues. We will also push a new branch to the Github repo called 1.8-dev which has the AuxPoW switch on the testnet set for block 158,100 (Tomorrow 6:30 GMT). The updated branch will be available later today, so keep

AuxPoW Debate an eye on the repo if you’re interested. This will be done to help pool operators test the mining on the AuxPoW enabled chain in preperation of the switch on the main chain. If you know how to compile the client, then you can certainly help us by trying it out and even mine a bit with a few KH on the testnet. What you need to know, if you already have the testnet chain synced, is to start the client with -reindex the first time you run 1.8. This should be automated for the final so the transition will be as smooth as possible. What this does not mean is that we’re tying us to Litecoin. What we do is accepting Proof of Work from their miners if they happen to hit our difficulty target. But that is technical background stuff, which was explained several times before here. On that note, and I’m no economist, I also don’t see that have any negative effect on the price, considering the amount of “dumped” coins would probably not change. Also, you as miners are not forced to mine Litecoin to get Dogecoin now. You can still mine at your current pools directly to the Dogecoin network. The Android wallet and Multidoge will receive an update if needed.”

Putting this all in place leaves us stronger so what can we do now? Well, I’ve certainly quoted enough of other people’s thoughts. You may be wondering what do I think? Here’s my to-do list for the Dogecoin Community. You may love it or hate it, but this is the real world and this is reality I’m giving you. • Mine Dogecoins. The only way to secure the network is by mining. If you believe our coin has a future, then mine it. Yes, you may be mining it at a loss for now, but only we can change that. • Get yourself an ASIC. I started out with four R9 280X video cards. That was my first Ðogecoin rig back in January. It got me 3Mh/s at 1100 watts. My electric bill was $100 USD

a month and my office was 100 degrees in the dead of a brutal New Jersey winter, with all the windows open. Those four cards alone, without the other gear to make the rig cost $1600. When Gridseeds came out, I gladly sold my GPU’s and started a small Gridseed farm. When Gridseed Blades came out, I upgraded to them. I am currently hashing away at 26 Mh/s. Right now I can buy a Blade for $300, get 5.2Mh/s at 100 watts. I would need six AMD R9 290 cards at $400 each, with 1700 total watts to get the same hashrate. ASIC’s are going to get cheaper & more energy efficient as we move into the fall. Buy some, even if you just get a Blizzard for $60. • Be positive and active in the online community and elsewhere. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. Spread the word about the power of what Dogecoin can achieve whenever you can. SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW} <<< 37

Saving Dogecoin

• Get more directly involved with projects. I joined the first and second PR Group on /r/dogecoin. Are we getting anything done? I’d like to think so, but at least I’m trying. If you have an idea, get some shibe’s to help you and follow through with it. Build a service, open a store, write for this (and other) publications. Employ some of your talent for personal benefit and to benefit others. • Buy some stuff. Buy from vendors who will not convert to fiat. Use Ðogecoin like the currency it was intended to be. • Buy the coin. As we approach the cut off point in supply, there will be more demand. So, in a nutshell. Mine to secure the network. Get involved. Buy stuff. Buy the coin. Spread the word. We need adoption by anyone and everyone. If we can get the price up, many good things will happen. More miners will come on board. We may attract

38 >>> SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW}

investors, like Bitcoin did. Stores will take us more seriously. We are 80,000 strong and that is a pretty big town. We have strength in numbers. Don’t ever forget what made you a shibe in the first place. Latest ASIC News Some pretty big ASIC guns are coming out soon. Of course the ones promised in July are not here yet, neither are the August dates; what a surprise. One BIG warning. Don’t pre-order anything. Only buy what is in stock. I know you see all these killer units advertised as coming out soon, but trust me, wait until you see them in stock. Or don’t trust me, just ask any Bitcoin miner who pre-ordered an ASIC in 2013. Use the chart on pages 30-31 wisely. Remember, high hashrate isn’t great if you spend $200 a month on electricity and only mine $50. So keep an eye on two columns:

AuxPoW Debate Kh/s per $ and Electricity. On a side note, KNC Miner sent us a note stating that my posted figures for their hardware were wrong. That’s odd, however, as none of their equipment is in the hands of the public in order to verify their figures. As of now, here is a list of dubious sites/companies: • Arcticminer • Siliconart This is a list of companies that have made promises, but are yet to deliver: • • • •

Fibonacci: promised July delivery Alpha-Technology: promised July delivery Alcheminer: promised June/July delivery Hashcoins: promised July/August delivery

Tip Free1000: D7heCcEttopHGTCtaECB43qN7zSUpQ5bvd

These are companies promising delivery later: • Flowertechnology, KNC, MAT: quarter 3 • Bliss: october • EHS: no date, equipment sounds too good to be true • Moon Asics: equipment sounds too good to be true

See ASIC chart on pages 40-41. A note about the quotes in this article: All quotes are copied verbatim. They originally appeared on the Dogecoin subreddit at the URL listed below, and were part of the public discussions involving Dogecoin development. Sources used in this article: http://www.reddit.com/r/dogecoin/comments/2b11po/what_is_dev_team_going_do_about_dogecoins/ https://github.com/dogecoin/dogecoin

SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW} <<< 39

ASIC Miners

Product USD Cost Watts Hash Rate Nvidia 750TI GPU $170 65 300 Kh/s

AMD R9 290X GPU $399 275 900 Kh/s

Gridseed 5 Chip ASIC $20 6 370 Kh/s

Gridseed Blade ASIC $200 100 5200 Kh/s

Zeus Blizzard $60 40 1350 Kh/s

Zeus Hurricane X3 $450 460 14000 Kh/s Zeus Thunder X3

$350

920 28000 Kh/s

Zeus Blizzard x6 $145 110 3600 Kh/s

Zeus Hurricane x6 $290 230 9000 Kh/s

Zeus Thunder x6 $350 450 18000 Kh/s Zeus Lightning x6

$725

1000

44000 Kh/s

GAWMiner Fury $36 45 1300 Kh/s

GAWMiner Black Widow $225 520 13500 Kh/s

GAWMiner Falcon $390 1040 27000 Kh/s GAWMiner War Machine

$750

2000 54000 Kh/s

Hashra Lunar Launcher $425 485 14000 Kh/s Hashra Lunar Launcher Warp 2

$845

970 28000 Kh/s

Hashra Lunar Launcher Warp 10

$4,245

4850 140000 Kh/s

Hashra Lunar Launcher Warp 20

$8,495

9700 280000 Kh/s

Innosilicon A2 1/2 module $1,058 75 6400 Kh/s

Innosilicon A2 1 module $1,949 150 12800 Kh/s

Innosilicon A2 2 modules $1,899 300 25600 Kh/s

Innosilicon A2 4 modules $10,773 600 51200 Kh/s Innosilicon A2 5 modules

$8,300

750 64000 Kh/s

Innosilicon A2 6 modules

$7,999

900 76800 Kh/s

SilverFish Blade $840 440 28000 Kh/s

SilverFish Box $3,650 1100 70000 Kh/s Dragon challenger (B2) 40 >>> SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW}

$1,700

1000 30000 Kh/s

Late Summer 2014

.11 KWH/month Ð per day ROI Price per Mh/s $5.15 400 Never $566.67

$21.78 1200 Never $444.44

$0.48 500 779 Days $53.92

$7.92 7200 228 Days $38.46

$3.17 1800 198 Days $44.44

$36.43 19300 149 Days $32.14

$73.16 38600 103 Days $12.50

$8.71 4900 181 Days $40.28

$18.22 12400 184 Days $32.22

$35.64 24800 176 Days $19.44

$79.20 60700 91 Days $16.48

$3.56 1790 218 Days $27.65

$41.18 18600 158 Days $16.66

$82.37 37200 129 Days $14.44

$158.40 74500 125 Days $13.89

$38.10 19300 143 Days $30.36

$76.20 38600 106 Days $30.18

$381.00 193000 143 Days $30.32

$768.12 386000 143 Days $30.34

$5.94 8800 608 Days $165.31

$11.88 17600 559 Days $152.27

$23.76 35200 272 Days $74.18

$47.52 70400 773 Days $210.41

$59.40 88000 477 Days $129.69

$71.28 105600 383 Days $104.15

$34.85 38600 204 Days $30.00

$87.12 96500 315 Days $52.14

$79.20 41400 264 Days $56.67 SHIBE IN THE MINES {VMW} <<< 41

This November, we are launching a new monthly print and online magazine, ChainScape. This publication will focus on blockchain technologies, cryptoconveyance, and the cultures surrounding these new ways of using, transferring, and transforming information. When Satoshi Nakamoto’s white paper on Bitcoin was introduced, many people ran with the cryptocurrency layer of his work, but the larger - and fundamentally more important - aspect of his work is just now being realized in fantastic ways. ChainScape’s inaugural issue features an overview of current blockchain technology: the who, what, when, where, and why of cryptoconveyance. We have been interviewing both well-known and asyet-unknown personalities in the field, and look forward to sharing their visions of the future. ChainScape is a professional and polished magazine, with thoughtful commentary, articles, interviews, essays, and profiles. It serves all cryptocurrency and blockchain technology communities. We welcome submissions! If you have a story to tell and would like for us to

interview you about your project, if you want to write an essay about something related that you are passionate about, or if you are interested in becoming a part of ChainScape, please contact us. We intend to showcase the best, the strangest, the most wonderful, and the most forwardthinking technologies and visionaries in the crypto worlds. Look for upcoming information at the Very Much Wow website, www.verymuchwow.com, where we will post submission and publication dates for ChainScape. When the magazine launches, we will also launch a sister website to accompany it. Please email Birdie Jaworski at editor@verymuchwow.com with your queries. Those interested in advertising in our upcoming publication, please email sales@verymuchwow.com. Let us help you get your project, kickstarter, or company in front of over 100K unique readers!

CHAINSCAPE {VMW} <<< 43

PLAY with Your Doge A special thanks to Jyro Blade for his ideas!

Please enjoy this list of fun, crazy, wild, kind, funny, weird, goofy things to do with your Doge! Spread a little Peace, Love, and Doge into the world, Shibe!

WRITE A SONG ABOUT DOGECOIN! SHARE IT ON YOUTUBE! GIVE DOGECOINS AWAY AS BIRTHDAY GIFTS FOR YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY!

44 >>> PLAY {VMW}

Every shibe knows that you can save Doge, trade Doge, and buy stuff with Doge. But what else can you do? You might be surprised!

FOLD PAPER WALLETS INTO AIRPLANES AND TOSS THEM TO PEOPLE AT THE PARK

START A SECRET DOGECOIN CLUB! INVITE YOUR FRIENDS, COWORKERS, AND CLASSMATES!

Host a movie marathon! Invite your best friends over for a long evening of the best Doge movies on the planet. Get all of the classics ready: Beethoven, Old Yeller, Lady and Tramp, Marley,

WOW

Buddy, and Benji. Serve cookies shaped like Dogecoins along with Martha Shibewart’s Blue Moon cocktails. Hold a Doge trivia contest and send Dogecoins to the winner! PLAY {VMW} <<< 45

A YEARLONG PROJECT

Host a Dogecoin scavenger hunt for your friends and their doges! Hide paper wallets, funny pictures of Doge memes, and doge treats at a public doge park.

SPEND A COUPLE OF HOURS AT THE LOCAL MIDDLE SCHOOL AS A VOLUNTEER. OFFER TO TEACH THE STUDENTS ABOUT CRYTPOCURRENCY! HAND OUT DOGECOIN WALLETS!

Start an ongoing project — take a photo of something (how about your doge?) everyday for a year, and post them on a blog, tumblr, youtube, or reddit to raise Dogecoins for a charity.

Make new friends and turn them into shibes

when strangers find a paper wallet and ask you what to do with it!

46 >>> PLAY {VMW}

FOLLOW YOUR DOGE AROUND ALL DAY AND FIND OUT WHAT HE REALLY DOES!

NICE DOGE

SUCH FUN

Spend an evening watching the Doge Star and the Moon! Plan a temporary graffiti party! Buy sidewalk chalk at the dollar store (soon to be called the Dogecoin store, dontcha know) and meet your friends early on a weekend morning. Find a sidewalk that gets busy with weekend shoppers and draw Doges, Dogecoin symbols, and URLs of helpful Dogecoin websites!

DECOUPAGE A LUNCHBOX WITH PAPER WALLETS AND PRINTED DOGE MEME PICTURES!

WRITE A LETTER TO A FAMOUS PERSON IN THE DOGE WORLD. TELL THEM WHAT YOU LOVE MOST ABOUT DOGECOIN! (Apologies to Jackson and Billy!)

BE A GENEROUS SHIBE!

BE A VOLUNTEER!

MUCH YEAH!

Share your love of community and Dogecoin by volunteering to share your knowledge, interest, and excitement about cryptocurrency. Here are a Offer to teach few ideas:

1

How to Doge to a Girl Scout or Boy Scout troop. Both organizations now offer badges in internet exploration!

2 3

Offer to teach a class in Dogecoin at your local craftspersons cooperative. Show local artisans how easy it is to sell their handmade wares for Dogecoin! 4

JOIN YOUR LOCAL TOASTMASTERS GROUP AND GIVE A FEW SPEECHES ON DOGECOIN. NOT ONLY WILL YOU LEARN HOW TO SPEAK IN PUBLIC, YOU WILL BE SPREADING THE WORD!

START A DOGECOIN CLUB AT YOUR SCHOOL!

ROUTE 66 SHIBES UNITE

MAKE A PAPER DOGECOIN WALLET... USING INVISIBLE INK! FOOL YOUR FRIENDS!

Are you a traveling shibe with your mind and machine on the open road? Leave Dogecoin wallets at diners, rest areas, and National Parks!

MAKE A TIME CAPSULE AND FILL IT WITH DOGECOIN MEMORIES! INCLUDE A PHOTO OF JOSH WISE AND THE DOGECAR, A PAPER WALLET, AND ARTICLES FROM THE NEWS AND INTERNET. PUT THE TREASURES IN A SAFE, WATERPROOF BOX AND BURY IT IN YOUR BACKYARD. MAKE A NOTE THAT IT SHOULD BE OPENED IN 10 YEARS... WHEN 1 DOGE = 1 DOGE! PLAY {VMW} <<< 49

WAYS TO PLAY WITH YOUR DOGE

SO HELPFUL

RANDOM ACTS OF DOGE You’ve got the Doge! Spread it around the galaxy!

BUS STOPS Leave Dogecoin wallets at bus stops and public transit waiting areas. Make sure you leave a link to a good community resource.

WINDSHIELDS Leave Dogecoin wallets on windshields while owners are shopping, in church, or at work!

HOLIDAYS ARE COMING SOON Spend your Doge on some practical items that families in need could use. Buy household items, canned goods, and clothing, and donate them to a local charity.

HUMANE SOCIETY Definitely donate Dogecoins or food purchased with Doge to a shelter. But better yet, spend time walking the doges and petting them.

50 >>> PLAY {VMW}

BE HISTORIC! Many museums look for programs to offer the public. Why not offer to teach a History of Dogecoin this December, during the big 1 Year Anniversary? Don’t let Doge be a Dinosaur!

BE A FRIEND TO YOUR LOCAL CHAMBER OF COMMERCE

ASK YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY IF YOU CAN LEAVE A STACK OF FLYERS AT THE

Your local Chamber of Commerce will love to learn about how Dogecoin and cryptocurrency can help its members.

CHECKOUT DESK, OR POST INFORMATION ON A BULLETIN BOARD!

They usually

have weekly or monthly meetings, and would love to have you speak about Dogecoin and how local businesses can incorporate it into their lives! PLAY {VMW} <<< 51

RECORD A FUNNY VOICEMAIL MESSAGE. PRETEND YOU ARE A DOGE AND USE “DOGE-SPEAK.”

INTERVIEW A FINANCIAL GURU AND ASK THEM ABOUT DOGECOIN!

52 >>> PLAY {VMW}

GET A DOGECOIN MANICURE! ASK YOUR SALON TO PAINT DOGECOIN SYMBOLS ON YOUR NAILS!

DECORATE BLANK TEE SHIRTS WITH DOGECOIN SAYINGS!

MAKE A FIVE MINUTE VIDEO ABOUT DOGECOIN!

Make a scrapbook about Dogecoin! Collect your favorite moments, triumphs, seconds of despair, donations, news stories, and decorate it. Just imagine sharing it with your grandchildren in the future!

FLY A KITE! Fly a kite with the Dogecoin symbol on it!

Google everyone you knew in High School and tell them you are now a Dogecoin expert!

Friend them on Facebook and share some cool Dogecoin links if they show an interest!

MAKE A TREASURE MAP THAT LEADS TO A DOGECOIN WALLET! LEAVE IT WHERE SOMEONE WILL F IND IT!

UP UP AND AWAY WITH DOGE!

GEOCACHE YOUR DOGECOINS! SIGN UP FOR A GEOCACHING GROUP IN TOWN OR ONLINE AND LEAVE COORDINATES TO YOUR STASH OF DOGE!

PLAY {VMW} <<< 53

SO COOL

MAKE A COMIC Creat your own Dogecoin comic book! Get your friends to create Doge comics, too, and trade them!

MANY WAYS TO SHARE DOGE

REMEMBER THE DOGECOIN GLASS IS HALF FULL

New technology can be scary for older persons. Why not visit your local Senior Center and offer to teach an ongoing class in online safety... and cryptocurrency? Learning new skills helps keep minds and hearts active and healthy!

SUNTO CON NOSTINT EMPORE LACEA COMNR? QUID NMA DITATIO QUATIONE ET UT DOLOREPELIS

SUNTO CON NOSTINT EMPORE LACEA COMNR? QUID NMA DITATIO QUATIONE ET UT DOLOREPELIS

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- THE -

MOUNTAIN And down here is the space to add the line lorace very long anportaacit.

loreri ullut eum et ea quuntio eum que optatio dolessit, idi dis atur maios as voluptur sum rem qui dolor reperatur

HERE YOU SHOULD ADD A DESCRIPTION OF THE IMAGE BELOW...

rempor res ma si volent et eturbit, quatestorem alibus. Ratenis evellab iur sit quat. Elibust es aut evelique non porro tem fugit ut ut est, essuntur, sum fugiaspere quo vidus, estores temquaecus, consendis cus rehendis eos et rest latibus et, cuptateO-

LOREMES INUM DOLORROVIT FUGA. NAM, QUAMUSA ECE-

restotaepe volum qui num

SEQU ATURERIBUS A SUM REST OPTAE AUDA QUE NULLA-

rerae doloriam volorro occu-

TIATIA VENDIANTI IL IPSAME NONSERFERRO DOLORERA

samus dolorpos int explitatusam rehendi onsedissi co-

Audiciet lignia sae autatis et voluptam estiis sint lantius dolo-

rem alique plitatur, nobitate

ritam reste commmolor re nostiorit maximin t audiorrovid quo

volupta spelesto tem nobis

te odistiis restrum dignam re vellabo rumqui incturiorum aces

et veliquo diaerum et is sum

dernata non rehendae lamus as inus,Gmquaes sus evenis

aut re, totatecus. Ga. Ibus et etum fugitem est PLAY {VMW} <<< 55

SUCH COMMUNITY

SHIBES RULE!!!

UPVOTE

ALL THE POSTS WRITE A REVIEW FOR A DOGECOIN VENDOR THAT YOU LOVE. POST IT ON YELP, FACEBOOK, and TWEET IT TO YOUR FOLLOWERS!

Give your mail carrier a Dogecoin wallet. Tip her randomly now and then.

LEAVE PAPER WALLETS FILLED WITH DOGECOIN ALONG WITH A GENEROUS FIAT TIP AFTER A RESTAURANT MEAL. YOUR WAIT PERSON WILL BE THRILLED! PUT A WALKIE-TALKIE IN YOUR MAILBOX AND SPEAK DOGE TO ANYONE WHO WALKS BY!

PLAY WITH YOUR DOGE

Give out Dogecoin wallets to Trick or Treaters this Halloween!

SEND A THANK-YOU DOGECOIN PAPER WALLET TO SOMEONE WHO HAS DONE SOMETHING NICE FOR YOU!

Make up Dogecoin jokes and post them on the Dogecoin subreddit! See if you can get some of the well-known posters to make up a joke, too! Try to get a pun war started! PLAY {VMW} <<< 57

MAKE A DOGECOIN QUILT AND ENTER IT IN THE STATE FAIR!

Get a Dogecoin vanity license plate for your vehicle! 58 >>> PLAY {VMW}

GIVE DOGECOIN WALLETS TO STREET MUSICIANS, ALONG WITH AN EXPLANATION OF HOW THEY CAN USE IT!

Two words: Dogecoin Tattoo

MAKE EXTRA COPIES OF PAPER WALLETS FOR THOSE WHO NEED HELP PRINTING THEM AND LOADING THEM.

Stand up for the underdoge. If you see something terrible happening in our community, say something. We need your voice.

AMAZE FOLKS AT THE PUB BY FOLDING YOUR DOGECOIN PAPER WALLET INTO COOL ORIGAMI SHAPES!

- DON’T FORGET TO -

TIP

We all started our journey without a single Dogecoin. Most of us received our first Doge through tips. Pass it along, shibe. Buy lemonade from the kids down the street. Pay them what they want, then add a nice Dogecoin tip. Tell them to ask their parents to look up Dogecoin and help them learn about it. PLAY {VMW} <<< 59

HOLD A DOGECOIN PARTY SHIBE-STYLE, YO!

WOW SUCH PARTY

Dude. Where’s the bonz?! PARTY SAFE! SHIBES ARE RESPONSIBLE PARTY GOERS!

Hold an all out no-holds-barred Shibe-Stylin’ Dogecoin Party! How about getting together with 200 of your closest friends this December 6th and going all out for Dogecoin Day? This is a great opportunity to hand out Dogecoin wallets and sit in an easy chair and reminisce about the Old Days when 1 Doge = 1 Doge to all of the newcomers! PLAY {VMW} <<< 61

MERRY WOOF!

It’s almost time for the Holidays!

ON A REGULAR BASIS, PUT THE PHONE DOWN, THE COMPUTER AWAY, AND TAKE A WALK OUTSIDE. DOGECOIN IS FUN AND HAS THE POTENTIAL TO CHANGE THE WORLD IN INCREDIBLE WAYS. BUT WE NEED TO BE WHOLE, HEALTHY, AND HAPPY IN ORDER TO HELP.

HOST A DOGECOIN ART SHOW! INVITE THE COMMUNITY TO SUBMIT ARTWORK FEATURING SOMETHING HAVING TO DO WITH DOGECOIN AND DISPLAY THE SUBMISSIONS IN A GALLERY, AT YOUR HOME, OR ON THE INTERNET. 62 >>> PLAY {VMW}

Give the gift of Dogecoin this year, or spend your Doge with our community’s vendors!

KEEP DONATING TO COMMUNITY EFFORTS AND CHARITIES THAT NEED YOUR DOGE

START NOW, SHIBE

SUCH INFO!!!!!

START A DOGECOIN OR CRYPTO CURRENCY MEETUP GROUP! CHECK MEETUP.COM TO SEE IF THERE IS ONE IN YOUR AREA And here is one of the coolest things you can do with Doge: Read and share Very Much Wow! VERYMUCHWOW MAY 2014 | ISSUE 1

THE DOGECOIN MAGAZINE

PICK UP YOUR DOGE SO THAT HE CAN SEE THINGS FROM YOUR POINT OF VIEW! COMMUNITY > TECH > ENTERTAINMENT > NEWS > HUMOR

www.verymuchwow.com

A R e vi e w o f T ea D oge Very Much Wow recently purchased several kinds of looseleaf tea from Dogecoin vendor “Tea Doge.” Proprietor Barnaby Gallagher sells many different kinds of exotic teas in exchange for Dogecoin. We chose three kinds of tea in order to test Barnaby’s wares, as well as to support a Doge vendor. Barnaby takes incredible care with his packaging. Each type of tea was sealed in a foil-lined bag hand decorated with Dogecoin-motif drawings! Our tea was wrapped in rockets and doges and fanciful coins, all done by Barnaby’s hand. Wow! Such art! The first tea we tried was Yunnan Gold, a black tea from China. The name in Chinese, “Gong Fu,” means “Great Skill,” reflecting the kind of production that goes into the tea. The large buds in the pouch would mean an extra-heavy kick of caffeine - very much welcome at deadline! The tea tasted peppery, rich, almost buttery, with hints of raisin and plum. The quality of this tea was extraordinary, one of the finest Yunnan Gold varieties this editor has tried. The second tea was a Mi Xiang Red Tea. This tea is also called “Honey Tea” due to the intense sweet fragrance it exudes. As promised, the tea was delicate, sweet, with a bit of spiciness upon finish. 64 >>> TEADOGE {VMW}

Ve nd or B arna by Ga l l a gh e r The final tea was a Mi Xiang Oolong tea. This tea is more refined than the red, and as such, has an incredible richness in flavor and depth. We highly recommend Tea Doge as both a tea and a Dogecoin vendor. Barnaby knows his tea, and is willing to take his time and answer your questions. You may reach Tea Doge through his reddit.com user account. Drop him a message if you would like to order some tea! Not only is Barnaby a knowledgeable and business-minded shibe, he is a kind and compassionate person.

Contact Barnaby: http://www.reddit.com/user/teadoge

The Dogemarket Review

[Editor’s Note: Helen’s wonderful Dogemarket Review was submitted before deadline for the August issue. However, I, as editor, didn’t make deadline by a longshot! This issue is overdue, and so I apologize for the tardiness of this information. We will be adding Helen’s regular up-to-date analyses to our website, as well as future issues of VMW, so please check verywow.com for the latest news!]

It’s been another difficult month for Dogecoin, with the coin’s value meandering around the 35 to 40 Satoshi mark for the past fortnight.

DOGE/BTC Exchange Rate: Last 30 days to Jul 25, 2014

Source: dogecharts.org

However, it’s been an interesting month in a number of other ways. Firstly, the latest block reward halving took place on July 16. While there’s some economic theory to support the notion that halving should result in a price rise due to the change in supply, this doesn’t always play out in reality. Because halving doesn’t come as a surprise, the upcoming change is often factored into the market price well ahead of the event. On a related topic, there’s been a lot of concern around the hashrate, particularly in the wake of Charlie Lee’s comments in support of merged mining at the North American Bitcoin Conference this month. With the difficulty of mining on the increase, there’s certainly a concern that miners may move elsewhere, particularly in light of the perceived risks associated with a diminishing hashrate. So what does this mean for the market? The problem is that no one really knows. Various opinions have been floated, but it’s very difficult to assess the extent 68 >>> DOGEMARKET {VMW}

Dogemarket Analyst Helen Ensikat of the degree of investor risk arising from the lower hashrate, let alone the outcome of a major structural change such as merged mining. Theoretically, merged mining could improve investor confidence to some degree by lowering the currency’s risk exposure. However, at the same time, the market impact of effectively pegging the supply of Dogecoin to, say, that of Litecoin is something of an unknown. And finally, the month saw the practical effect of the low hashrate and shaky investor sentiment when Amagi Metals stopped accepting Dogecoin on July 23, following a low of 37 Satoshi the previous day. On the upside, the market depth at the time of writing still shows significant interest from investors, albeit at the 34 to 35 Satoshi mark. If we’re seeing genuine buyers here, there’s a potential for over 375,000,000 Doge to change hands, should the price drop by a couple of Satoshi.

Market Depth: July 25, 2014 04:10 GMT

Source: dogecharts.org

Turn Page to Continue...≥ {VMW} DOGEMARKET <<< 69

Dogemarket Analyst Helen Ensikat Market Capitalisation The Dogecoin’s market capitalisation is currently listed in eighth place in CoinMarketCap’s listings since last month, with the non-mineable BitSharesX having entered the charts in the seventh spot. In contrast Ripple - level with Dogecoin last month - has rocketed up the listings into third place, with its current cap of US$49m far outstripping Dogecoin which has fallen from

Dogecoin Distribution The Dogecoin distribution hasn’t changed significantly since last month. The top 100 richest addresses currently hold around 49 per cent of the coin’s currency, remaining broadly comparable with other major cryptocurrencies.

What coming up in the Dogemarket Review? It’s looking like our coin is at a point where some critical decisions will be made to determine its future. If the devs announce any concrete decisions about a hard fork and merged mining over the next month, it’s going to be anyone’s shibe.

Tip Helen: DBHcWoFVjQfRncvsD12yvvdaz6GgWTEPKA

70 >>> DOGEMARKET {VMW}

What is a Dogecoin Worth? The Fundamental Law of Shibemetrics By “Very Much Doctor” Bob

Vice President for Shibemetrics Such Institute of Wow Many people who are concerned about the value of cryptocurrencies mistakenly focus on relative exchange rates between a cryptocurrency and other assets. Depending on the assets in question, the perspective taken, and the random walk of markets, the “value” may veer dramatically each day. Setting aside fundamental questions about true worth (What is the “value,” if any, of money? According to whom?), the Such Institute measures the value of each cryptocurrency (or, indeed, any asset) against its own intrinsic worth. In the case of Dogecoin, then, the question is, “How many Doge is 1 Doge worth?” Using a proprietary analysis developed at the Such Institute, we estimated the monthly average value of 1 Doge in Dogecoins for the first six months of 2014. Figure 1 shows the monthly averages along with a projection to the end of the current quarter. For comparison, Table 1 gives the equivalent statistics for these months for Dogecoin, Bitcoin, and the US Dollar.

Figure 1. The value (Dogecoins) of 1Doge (averaged over each month) (YTD 2014) 72 >>> SHIBEMETRICS {VMW}

Shibemetrics

Table 1. The Value of Dogecoin, Bitcoin, and the US Dollar (2014)

As these data show, there is a clear and fundamental pattern, which we call the First or Fundamental Law of Shibemetrics:

1 Doge = 1 Doge

This law is sometimes attributed to Sensei Shibetoshi Birdiemoto, though it probably originated in one of the ancient Koans of the school of Jacksonatoshi Palmeromoto, “What is the sound of 1 Doge clapping?” This Shibemetric analysis was incorporated as part of the Dogecoin Market Value Prediction Tool1 from Very Much Wow.

Wow Theory! Much Profound! Very Meaning! 1

http://www.verymuchwow.com/dogecoin-market-value-prediction-tool/

Tip “Very Much Doctor” Bob: DRAhz9heD2SVmtZB5D2WgHwmvxudz7kLzk

W

OW {VMW} SHIBEMETRICS <<<73

PHOTO of the MONTH

DOGE AT THE ZOO! | SUBMITTED BY HUTCH DJfv4Vm5YhpGnsT6B28xTppy8qnyTPQjuS

74 >>> PHOTO OF THE MONTH {VMW}

ART of the MONTH

original art by CICEROTHEDOG DL61GntHKkhQERUsuJdS9WPpW3Mij4vYTE

{VMW} ART OF THE MONTH <<< 75

MetaFawkes: like a column of rising meh

Photo courtesy WikiMedia This freakish steam locomotive was produced in 1925 in the UK, the land where long, long ago steam engines were first re-invented. By the 1930s engine design was starting to get pretty funky (but that is for another article). This poor mutant locomotive above was given no name apart from U1, which is tragic; although thankfully it didn’t have any brothers or sisters, which fact would have caused this whole article to go off track. It was bred in a lab to be a summation of all known best working technology in its class. It was designed by the great Nigel Gresley. This was presumably on the day before he got his eyes tested, but after his successful debut in the South Norwood Amateur Dramatic Society’s noteworthy production of “Dr Frankentoshi and the Chamber of Steamy Secrets”. Premise… The development of the locomotive through the late 20s and early 30s has a certain resonance with the current progress of blockchain technology. Hang a hat on the U1 hatstand and take a seat. Enhance with an obvious and illogical comparison… The steam engine was the driving force of the Industrial Revolution just as the microchip is driving the Information Revolution today. This particular engine is from 1925 and is just before a growth spurt and enhancement-rich development stage. Blockchain technology is in its own “Class of 1925” lab and it has produced its own U1, which is a currency engine. 76 >>> METAFAWKES {VMW}

Fabricate the MetaFawke foundation... The U1 (LNER 2395) is an object of complexity, one of synchronized parts and sturdy build - basically it is two engines combined into one locomotive. It was designed and built to serve a single purpose - pulling heavy coal trains up long hills - a necessary activity that helped drive the growth of coal fired industry and thereby the Industrial Revolution. And it looks remarkably like today’s crypto currency engine. Big old bitcoin - with a traditional, tested blockchain boiler plus bitcoin drive unit, and an additional altcoin scrypt drive unit added up front. In this metafawkical engine, Bitcoin has alt coins to help it get to the top of the hill pulling the heavy load of crypto-finance adoption behind - a necessary activity that needs a rather unique engine. One that is the same yet different. Try and find another angle to frame it… Why did it need to look like this to get up a hill? Simple - the more wheels you can drive, the more contact you can have with the track, which means better grip, or rather the application of the massive available torque over a greater area. If you want a single engine unit and need that much more power, the efficient thing to do is bolt more drive wheels on your already proven design. Some wheels may be more elegant than others but they are all bolted onto an ugly brute so let’s not get elitist. The more coins we can get driving wheels on the common track the better. The boiler is a proven technology,

the drive units are our currencies. We are all driving this train. Look at the context of this confusion for extra depth… Railways changed the world - sped it up, brought real time communications - right from the start they were a functional invention. As they evolved so too did our control of combustion. Around the world today there are locomotives of every sort in operational service and preserved in museums. Fundamentally they all do the same thing. One of the prime factors in the success of their ancestors was the ability to haul heavy black money. Blockchains will change the world - they show already how they can speed up secure financial transactions - right from the start they are a functional invention. The current evolutionary state of crypto currencies might be compared to the locomotive from 1925 - just at the dawn of the greatest era of steam engines and yet still stuck hauling coal. All the functioning requirements are met or capable of being met within the known designs, but this locomotive will meet a purpose that none other can. It will pull harder and longer and can keep adding wheels when old ones wear out.

So that’s what a MetaFawke is? Are we done? Yes, but the definition also requires some sort of inverted summary, and a call to action, and a silly footer. Remind reader to consider themselves lucky that we never metafawked about… Hubs and nodes and networks, state vs private ownership, innovation and incubation, canals, tunnels, pollution, emancipation, land surveying, golden spikes, planes, automobiles. Conclusion and call to action: The proposition is, based on this thorough and deep analysis, that a new scientific unit needs to be defined in order to further the enormous profundity of human understanding. It will be known as the Gresley, and it will be a measure of the number of active blockchain currency wallets online at any given time. Gresleys will take the standard SI prefixes such as micro and kilo. 1 Gresley shall equal 280082 wallets. What say you? Aye?

Gratuitous namedropping for extra meh... So you could also say that the PoW changes and Counterparty and all the other variations of crypto currency theory and practice are just like changing the surface of each individual wheel until you find one that works for your diameter. Reach the lowest level… Let’s all put our engineer’s hats on and pretend that the retail adopters and day-to-day users of cryptos are the destination of the train. The track leads to real people doing real things in reality. The train takes the goods to where they can be put to use. Now here’s a misconception that you may have formed… Blockchain technology is not being generally compared to trains or steam engines in this metafawke. Why not? Well because the fact that trains and steam engines still do the same limited things today as they did 90 odd years ago makes that broad comparison ridiculous. Of course blockchain currency will develop and become a necessity and change the world, just as railways have done, but it will likely go much further than that.

Puffing Billy – 200 years ago (1814) Photo courtesy WikiMedia

This is a validated transmission by the cult of MetaFawkes. We communicate metafawkically. We are a cult. Other cults also exist. E&OE. Tip the cult of MetaFawkes: DCULTU57A1ctmrQbudzw8YBYkJmzUNML8z

{VMW} METAFAWKES <<< 77

A SHIBE /u/mumzie is our newest employee, in charge of community support and helping you all out. She’s been volunteering her time on /r/dogetipbot and has been the BEST HELPER EVER. She’s now in charge of customer support. I’m sure you’ll be pleased.” And here is /u/couchdive’s comment to the announcement: “...Don’t underestimate her skills to get a consensus on things and get things rolling constructively either. Never seen anything like that on the internet in my life; and very rarely in person - at that!”

M

by Captain Slack Marrow

umzie - the moderator of a swathe of subreddits, the erstwhile co-ordinator of reddit ideas that become reality (eg. Dogeducation, the PR Group, the Dogecoin group), the Foundation board member, the giveaway regular, the first responder, the mediator. She’s the dedicated shibe we have all seen in action in some way or another. Well things are changing for Mumzie, and this article is by way of a small tribute in recognition of her achievements to date. She has accepted a role working for Dogetipbot - as Josh Mohland announced via his dogetipbot blog:

“I’m also pleased to announce that 78 >>>SHIBEFORALLSEASONS {VMW}

and a comment from /u/keb14

“Mumzie encouraged me and supported me when I first started 4 months ago..thanks again Mumzie… You are a big plus to the human race” /u/42points – who has probably put the most Mumzie Miles on the clock: “Mumzie continues to be a great person to discuss anything dogecoin related with. Moderating /r/dogecoin is a pretty tough job. There are always people trying to create problems or cause trouble, and to work out how to deal with these issues you need people who are extremely rational and keen to talk about the hard things. They see things how they are and have a passion to sort them out. Mumize is often this person. These days Mumzie still continues to help out. She almost always joins in discussions in the moderation chat rooms. She knows the subreddit inside out and helps out any way she can. It’s really just a pleasure knowing and working with her to moderate one of the greatest places on the internet.”

FOR ALL SEASONS Another well-known moderator /u/peoplma says “…She’s always been super helpful to everybody, if someone, anyone, asks her for something, or just a simple question, she will do everything she can to find the answer. In doing this, she is always learning herself too, and that’s how she’s become so knowledgeable about all things dogecoin. “We mod /r/dogecoin together, as well as /r/dogeducation, we make pretty much all decisions based on consensus, and I think we all work together as a team pretty well. Both of us just really enjoy helping new people get their first dogecoins, and helping them get set up. I’ve probably helped a couple of hundred new shibes get their first coins, and she’s done way more than me, so I wouldn’t be surprised if 1000 people’s first coins were Mumzie coins.” and /u/GoodShibe writes: “Incredibly motivated and always positive, Mumzie is Dogecoin’s den-mother. Selfless and kind, she is always doing her best to make sure we’re all playing safe and having fun. She really, truly cares about those around her and that’s why she’s a shining example, to me, of what a Shibe can be. “She inspires me to work harder and reminds me that though trolls may lurk under the bridge some days, there’s always a spot waiting for me up there on the moon if I’m willing to reach for it.” Mumzie is never far away - you can PM her in 2 clicks from the main subreddit. That’s what most of us would consider to be over-exposure, yet she’s never backed away from it, and over the months she has actually

made herself more available, and she still spends huge amounts of time welcoming and helping new shibes. Josh Mohland has gained one of the most singularly devoted people that Dogecoin is ever likely to have. All of us, from novice to veteran, have come across her attentive kindness in some form or another over the months. For this alone she deserves the highest accolades and the best wishes from us all as she takes on a formal position working for Dogetipbot. Most will not have had the pleasure of working directly on projects with her, where her contributions are significant and her involvement backstage remains widespread. If there was a simple way to describe her working methods then it might be that she is a fuzzy logic machine - she has the rare ability to find compromise in complex or polarized situations. She quietly persists until all the factors are accounted for, she supports all points of view that are relevant and almost never puts her own viewpoint ahead of those she is working with. She considers, contemplates, processes and mediates; and she is undaunted by the organizational workload that comes with this approach. A diplomat who does not back away from taking on the task of servicing backchannel realms of frequent confusion, disputes and drama. Such Mumzie so respect. Wishing Mumzie every continued success as she takes on her new role at Dogetipbot. Let’s leave the last word to her: “I was so excited when offered this opportunity. I about fell out of my chair:) Such awesome!”

W {VMW} SHIBEFORALLSEASONS<<< 79

A Review o f D O GE M INER

When someone tells you they are mining Dogecoin, one would generally picture CPUs, GPUs, or ASICs churning out heat and Dogecoin in a room all day long. In Dogeminer, by Webber Robots, you can do away with your fancy specialized technology and turn your clicks into cold hard DOGE. Just don’t try to spend that Dogecoin outside of the game. Dogeminer is available for PC and Android devices. This review focuses on the PC version, but the Android version appears very similar. Dogeminer follows the template set out by games like Cookie Clicker, by Orteil, where the player creates a resource primarily by clicking on a single onscreen icon. In this case clicking on the image of a hard hat wearing Doge will cause her to swing her pickaxe and yields a Dogecoin for the user’s effort. Each click gives another Dogecoin. After clicking a few times, players will have gathered enough Dogecoin to start growing their mining

business. In the store, players can purchase a variety of automated systems using the coins they have earned to help them extract more precious Dogecoin. “Mining Shibes” are the least expensive workers, but compared to the very expensive “Time Machine Mining Rig” have a far lower output. It’s up to the user to decide the best way to achieve their return on investment. Also for sale are upgrades that improve your mining mechanisms. Initially, only a couple upgrades are available, but as the game progresses and users purchase more automated miners, dozens of other options will become available that offer upgrades to every aspect of the mining operation. The overall goal of the game is simply to earn as much Dogecoin as possible. From a simple single Shibe operation to a huge automatic network of Moon Bases and Space Rockets doing your work, the game entices you to keep mining and expanding. There are

n i o c h c

u m

80 >>> PRESS PAWS {VMW}

W O W

“Dogeminer is a fantastic casual time-waster, and I cannot recommend it enough.”

DOGEMINER

no true win or loss conditions in Dogeminer, and it fits very nicely as a casual game. I found Dogeminer to be an extremely addictive experience and have clocked over 35 hours of technical playtime as of writing this review. Once your systems are automated, Dogeminer works perfectly as a game to keep open in a second tab while you browse the internet and check on occasionally, so some amount of your playtime won’t be actively spent interacting with the game. The game offers tons of achievements to earn, and tracks everything from your clicks to your total coins mined. The art in the game is very simple, but works perfectly for the overall experience. Some more careful placement to the location of the sprites for the automated assistants would have been appreciated, as at later points in the game they become a little cluttered, but that is a minor gripe. The audio is perfectly fine, but I found myself turning off the music and most of the audio simply because it is a little repetitive over many hours of play. The one noteworthy problem with Dogeminer is a major plateau point in your business growth. Once you get going it becomes fun and easy to purchase upgrades and automatic workers until a certain point after several hours of play where all the upgrades are far too expensive. I found myself leaving the game running overnight once to get the required DOGE to get the next upgrade, at which point the normal pace resumed. This still was not enough to deter me from my mining operation. Dogeminer is a fantastic casual timewaster, and I cannot recommend it enough. It is very well crafted, and the Dogecoin theme is more than enough to sell it alone. Visit dogeminer.se to play and please consider tipping the developer at the address near the bottom of the page for his/her hard work.

Tip Jyro:

D6SbM3coVCo7uYrqJZBMPJbSb476e5AhfM

{VMW} PRESS PAWS <<<81

DOGECOINBALL Thank you, Carlos. We love and miss you. {VMW} DOGECOINBALL <<< 83

The Rise and Rise of Bitcoin: Final Cut Review

L

et’s face it: digital currency history is confusing. While big-daddy Bitcoin is calling the shots at the top, there’s a plethora of events and information to explore and learn from that can help new altcoins, like Dogecoin, flourish and become successful. But how? How can we seriously trace such a complex history on an already complex technology, when so many new developments are happening each and every day? Director Nicholas Mross took up that challenge in the early days of Bitcoin, and has created a documentary that explains and explores the origins and rise of Bitcoin in the past five years.

84 >>> WATCH ME REVIEW {VMW}

The Rise and Rise of Bitcoin premiered at Tribeca Film Festival earlier this year and was received with open arms from the digital currency community and outsiders in attendance alike. Unfortunately, the documentary was not released or shown a second time, due to the need for further editing. The move left many to wonder, “when will I ever get to see this film?” Luckily, on July 18, 2014, the North American Bitcoin Conference surprised attendees with the first ever Final-Cut screening of The Rise and Rise of Bitcoin at their kickoff party. It just so happened that this movie reviewer was

in attendance that night, and let me tell you, this is a film you’re going to want to show your friends and family. It’s hard enough to explain digital currency and the blockchain already, so you might as well let this film do it for you. The documentary is a fascinating view of the world Satoshi Nakamoto inspired from the ground floor. Nicholas Mross, director, follows his brother Daniel Mross, a simple Bitcoin miner, along the journey that is the early days of Bitcoin. It’s an amazing, honest history lesson and introduction to digital currency. The team meets with prominent Bitcoin figures, including Charlie Shrem, Vitalik Buterin, Roger Ver and the infamous Mark Karpeles, to tell the story of Bitcoin as it moves forward. As the digital currency world enters the current third stage of adoption, first being when digital currency was worthless, second being when it became profitable, there’s a lot of history that new adopters missed out on. Digital currency is only five years old, but the big events that laid the groundwork have been critical to all currency development; whether that be Bitcoin, Litecoin or Dogecoin. There’s a desperate need for education, and this film provides a well put-together chronological framework. This film not only explores the good times of Bitcoin; it also explores the dark past. Mross goes places that no one wants to remember, including Mt. Gox’s various negative incidents along with the Silk Road bust. Mross was even able to snag an interview with a dealer on the original Silk

Road, known as Mr. Bitcoin. In the beginning, Daniel Mross told the camera, with a giant grin on his face, that he placed an order with Butterfly Labs. He seemed so excited too. It evoked a roar of laughter from the audience that set a hilarious tone. While some people would rather have those moments blotted out, the Mross brothers take them head on. If you can’t laugh at yourself, then how can you laugh at anyone else, right? One of the best indicators of the quality of the film was how rowdy the crowd became. I was sitting in a room full of digital currency evangelists who were all there because they believed in the field. The room was active; filled with laughter, boos and sometimes even anger. Seeing people become passionate about something like finances is staggering. We see people jest and cheer about sports and politics, but about money? That’s why I believe digital currency is changing the world. The social conversation is changing daily, and this film shows it step-by-step as it follows Bitcoin’s evolution. The timeline isn’t quite measured in days and months, but rather is measured in the U.S. dollar exchange rate at the current time. The film follows the ups and down of the market from when one Bitcoin was worth $0.50, to breaking the $1000 mark. It brings a hilarious aspect of hindsight and an “I wish I would have” ideology most everyone can relate to. Some people have been complaining that the film’s information is outdated since its release has not yet been announced. This being the final cut version, one can

assume that the film will be available sooner rather than later. The timeline starts at the beginning, with an explanation of Satoshi Nakamoto and his disappearance and drives onward to the accusations of Dorian Nakamoto. The information goes right up to one of the latest big events, and goes above and beyond in explaining how digital currency works. Leaving the questions: “The information is outdated? To whom?” The Rise and Rise of Bitcoin isn’t intended for audiences that have been informed since 2009. It was meant for people who need a lengthy, yet simplified, explanation on this highly confusing technology. It was meant for people looking to learn. In that regard, it hits the nail right on the head, being fair and balanced in its message. This film was something digital currency needs to encourage mass adoption, and I can’t wait until it hits theater release, DVD or Netflix.

Tip Clay:

DLJ1TcXNJShKNbK7GUxsQSovdVMz6RwaKe

{VMW} WATCH ME REVIEW <<< 85

W E VI

RE

The cover for All You Can Do - Watsky’s father Paul and his cat Saruman.

Georgy Watsky | All You Can Do

W

hile we are discussing the future of Dogecoin, I wanted to discuss one artist that seems to have an equally bright future, George Watsky. If you are active on /r/Dogecoin, you may recall that this Bay-area rapper tweeted that he was looking into accepting Dogecoin for payment - so that’s already one reason he may join us on the moon. Despite being relatively obscure, Watsky is no amateur. He was seasoned in the slampoetry scene, where he mastered his lyricism and became adept at swatting away ad hominem criticisms. This shows in his music through a demonstrated preference for bucking hiphop standards, relying instead on his battlehardened poetry prowess to carry his content.

86 >>> AMAZE, SO LISTEN {VMW}

For example, the song “Sloppy Seconds,” from the album Cardboard Castles, revels in the used and tattered things in life (instead of the industry standard for celebrating the new and blingy) - “my favorite sweater was a present that I got a couple presidents ago / And I promised that I would rock it until its thread bare, bet on it.” On one hand, a lack of stereotypical content is like a breath of fresh air for an avid hip-hop fan, but sometimes you just need to crank something up in the car. Watsky’s first two albums are simply not that. Despite working with underground titans like Dumbfoundead, Watsky’s music can often be too introspective to casually listen to. Watsky’s latest album, All You Can Do achieves a balance of these two inclinations, and still maintains the rappers

Georgy Watsky | All You Can Do personal style. Released August 12th, All You Can Do is a dedication to Watsky’s parents. The album cover features his father (a picture of his mother is inside the case), and the production emulates “music they listened to while growing up.” Whether intentional or not, Watsky’s use of psychedelic guitar solos and minimalist drum riffs adds a touch of “mainstream” to his songs, which I, for one, welcome. Chart-toppers like Eminem and Iggy Azalea are proof that the “soaring guitar solo” is trending in hip-hop again, and let’s not forget that it is a tradition going all the way back to Run-DMC. All You Can Do’s third track, “Bet Against Me” goes all-out with the 70’s style guitar solo, combining it with vocals that are layered to sound like a war protest at times, but still maintaining a modern braggadocio that keeps it grounded in modern hip-hop. This psychedelic guitar keeps a voice throughout the album, again showing up in “Woah Woah Woah.” Watsky said of the song, “it includes elements of my personality and what I could do with wordplay, and had a catchy chorus. It’s a song for people who feel like they’re not getting their due respect from people.” Of course, he’s right. Impressively changing between lyrical styles, Watsky does vocal gymnastics while our guitar slowly builds suspense until it is the only remaining sound - winding up until it washes out. The song is an absolute motivator and is in the vein of other hip-hop standard-bearers such as Macklemore’s “Can’t Hold Us” and Kanye’s “Gone.” If you thought modeling the album after the music of his parents was an excuse to save face while Watsky leans towards the mainstream, prepare to be delightfully wrong. His trademark honest complexity is still running wild in “Ink Don’t Bleed” as Watsky discusses an incident from the London show of his last tour, where he climbed a 30-foot lighting rig and dove into the crowd, injuring two fans: “She’s in school to do tattoos and might of had nerve damage / So I could have cost a girl a chance at her dream.” No excuses are made, and Watsky again proves that he may be his own worst critic, publicly exploring the incident in a way that few contemporary artists would dare expose

themselves to. The cherry on top of this dedication is the final track, “Cannonball,” featuring Stephen Stills (of Crosby, Stills, & Nash), a legend to anyone who has listened to the music of the 70’s, but whose influence is likely unknown to casual listeners today. It is a song where the production and chorus would be at home on any classic album, but supports Watsky’s poetic verse as a crown supports a jewel - a singularly enjoyable moment that both fits the album, but is absolutely unique. Overall, this album is one that Watsky needed, a move that maintains his personality, but still nods to the mainstream. It is the kind of work that says of itself, “Whatever you think, at least I put myself out there.” Some people avoid hip-hop because they feel that is it too predictable or formulaic, which can be true. However, if you enjoy cerebral, sometimes introspective vocals and fun composition, you owe it to yourself to listen to All You Can Do.

Tip Tom: D76r9vZeJTE6FGmharckyo1ZiYn4bdxTmJ

{VMW} AMAZE, SO LISTEN <<< 87

Rec

ss ce

r y C p to S r o f u e c ip

UNFILTERED THOUGHTS

As the title suggests in this article, I’m going to be discussing the recipe for success in the cryptocurrency ecosystem. Follow these few easy steps and you’re sure to scam people out of their money create a successful coin and get rich help humanity achieve a better future. Not all the steps are required for success and to that end I shall mark them as required or optional. STEP ZERO (OPTIONAL): Catchy title, because everyone knows that if the currency you’re spending doesn’t have a catchy name it’s crap and you can’t possibly use it. STEP ONE (OPTIONAL): Premine. Because if you don’t premine how can you advertise your life changing, future bettering, sexual performance 88 >>>UNFILTEREDTHOUGHTS {VMW}

improving product ? What funds will you use to advertise your creation on live TV or radio or through smoke signals to people who can’t even afford a phone or have no idea what it does or have never seen a computer or never even left their village whose lives you’re seeking to better ? Why optional ? Because you can always use the profits from step three. P.S.: Name it something fancy like “development funds” or “stabilization fund” or something economic-y or marketing-y. STEP ONE POINT FIVE (OPTIONAL): IPO. Because you know, everyone would want to pay for an open source software that can be instantly cloned and used for free by anyone and because those “investors” will ensure your coin’s value won’t drop when if someone “accidentally the whole premine”.

Recipe for Crypto Success STEP X WHERE X>1.5 AND X<2 (OPTIONAL):

STEP FIVE (OBLIGATORY):

Claim the most far fetched use case scenario for your coin as possible, be it it’s worth one metric ton of manure per unit or it’ll be printed on paper and parachuted over a country or a city or a small village, name it some obscure demographic’s future internets currency even tho that obscure demographic has no use for an online currency but rather food or clean water or some other pleb stuff.

Be vewy vewy quiet during the distribution phase period because innovation shouldn’t need promoting and everyone should know about it by default and then a few hours before it ends spam everyone, everywhere with announcements of services and innovations and plans and whatnot because it will create a panic buy trend that can only end well … always … never fails, trust me. STEP SIX (MANDATORY):

STEP TWO (OBLIGATORY): Small total coins production, because everyone knows that if you have one stone out of a total 10 in the world is better than having 10 stones out of 100 total stones in the world. STEP THREE (OPTIONAL): This is only optional if you followed step two. After you and your close ones have had your fill of the coin mining x% of total coins where x>5 … maybe 10% of the total market cap, have a mandatory update that reduces coin production by a factor of N effectively making your stash worth N times more than it previously did. Don’t worry about people good at maths because the “investors” holding your coin will praise you so much that you’re likely to be nominated for the crypto-Nobel Prize. This works whether you followed step two or not, but it’s absolutely mandatory if you didn’t. STEP FOUR (MANDATORY): The mining period should be counted in the order of days, because everyone knows that a few days is all it takes to fairly distribute a candidate for the internet’s global currency title. Don’t worry about people who weren’t able to mine your coin because they blinked or something, they’re pleb and will buy off early adopters at overvalued prices because economics and logic.

After the distribution/mining period ends it is required that the coin transition to proofof-stake because everyone knows proof-of-stake is more secure and environment friendly. Also, the economical incentive to hoard your cash is super-good for growth. Again don’t worry about the fact that it’s been proven numerous times that proof-of-stake is severely flawed as a securing mechanism and/or very centralized towards a single point of failure (the developers mostly) because again, “investors” will praise you for saving the planet while making everyone rich so much that the Pope chair starts looking pretty damn attainable to you and your team. STEP SEVEN (OBLIGATORY): Get at least one twitter crypto-guru on board via what pleb in their inferiority call bribing. While you’re at it also get at least one crypto news channel and an “established” exchange (established meaning it’s online since early-late 2014) on board through the same process because nothing spells secure future like bribing everyone to get ahead. STEP EIGHT (OPTIONAL): As eerily as it seems infrastructure and services that help merchant adoption and other weird stuff that seems to be required for a successful coin aren’t a must but if you reeeeeealy have to do them make sure they’re all based {VMW} UNFILTEREDTHOUGHTS <<< 89

Recipe for Crypto Success on one single point of failure control security (you) or else anyone can do anything with your hard worked services and that just won’t pass in an open-source improvement-needing environment. STEP 8.5 (MANDATORY): “Anonomouse” transactions, tor integration, everything all regular people NEED to acquire drugs, launder money, purchase child pornography, and all that other stuff everyone does ARE A MUST! You can’t have a working currency if it doesn’t meet the needs of the many. Who cares about stuff like basic usage features and whatnot when you can do all the above with it? It’s basic logic … duhhh. STEP NINE (OPTIONAL): Are you rich yet? … Ahem I mean, did you improve everyone’s life yet? Well … just in case you didn’t make sure that in case something catastrophic happens like an exchange drops the ball because they were staking coins to control the market or working with the devs on a stolen idea for an api and one of the devs dropped the ball unforeseen circumstances leading to a hacker stealing enough coins to overthrow the network because of proof-of-stake’s inherent flaws, just roll back the chain because who cares that the whole point of cryptocurrency is having an open, intangible, uncontrollable, verifiable ledger and coins are just a byproduct of the concept. Everyone loves rollbacks and bailouts .. EVERY - ONE!

isn’t for everyone so here’s a list of successful cryptocurrencies who have done most if not all of the above and are now the de facto currency of everything: stackcoin, blackcoin, whitecoin, asiacoin, pandacoin, vericoin, darkcoin, aurora, quark, mazacoin and so on and so forth, the list of successful coin projects is looooong and hard to find (lol, “long and hard”). BONUS FEATURES: flashy wallets with absolutely no useful added features, bogus companies, pr firms, hidden premines, absolutely no kind of innovation - just a clear cut, copy paste source code because why risk when the old stuff is proven. All of these and more are not absolutely necessary but they do add value to your project and show your motivation towards bettering the world. Disclaimer: some of the expressions used in this article are niche jokes thus some people might not understand them and overlook them as some sort of error … they’re not, they’re internet jokes. If you feel I’ve wronged your coin in this article by forgetting to put it’s name in the example list please contact me at idont@care.com.

Forever yours, Crowley

STEP TEN (OBLIGATORY): Announce a bunch of stuff and never deliver. Always a turn-on. Always. STEP ELEVEN (OBLIGATORY): ???? STEP TWELVE (OBLIGATORY): PROFIT!

Still not sure ? Don’t worry theory

90 >>>UNFILTEREDTHOUGHTS {VMW}

Tip Crowley: 1GtYiC2Djs1JUrbHYVa8jqtCzk6fEhYKe8

Feature Creep, Obsolescence... and Doge previously performed quite well. The Today, Microsoft killed my Skype. solution to a software upgrade was of It was a brutal act of premeditated course to buy more memory, faster murder. Murder most foul, carried out CPU’s or whatever IBM was pushing at in the name of progress. the time. New models would replace How and why did this come about, old, and there was no option to stay and how is it relevant to our beloved with what was already working, because cryptocurrency? IBM owned the machines, and would Gather round the campfire, kids, dump them at sea to guarantee there pull up a log, and let an old-timer spin was no used computer market. The ye a yarn. new machines needed new operating Back around the dawn of time, systems, and the cycle would repeat computers were building-sized affairs over and over. costing millions. And the biggest You can read a fascinating book player in the field, IBM, came up with published in 1975 titled “And tomorrow a cunning plan to milk their clients of ... the world? : inside IBM” by Rex Malik, as much cash as humanly possible. You which your local library is sure to have. couldn’t buy an IBM mainframe back Or, you could study Microsoft or then. You could only lease it, and it Apple because they read the book, and came with IBM engineers who would learnt quite a lot from it. Apple took it set up camp inside your company especially to heart, seeing as how they and maintain it. Think of KGB agents control both the hardware and software. embedded within the Pentagon, and you If you have something that works, don’t get an idea of their real function. worry, Apple is working very hard to Periodically, IBM would roll out break it, and force you to upgrade to upgrades. In alternating cycles, the their latest offerings. And if you were a hardware and the software would be contented user of Windows XP? Well, ‘improved’ marginally. These advances you’re also out of luck, although you would naturally cost more, and would got a much longer run out of it than inevitably break things that had Microsoft would have liked. 92 >>>FULVIOGERARDI {VMW}

Keep It Simple, Stupid! And don’t be expecting any better treatment from Google either. While they don’t sell hardware and software like the other two, they’re even more pervasive and have proven a desire to innovate you into submission. Look at how they wrecked Google+, which was perfected very early in its life, and then ‘upgraded’ to the point of instability in a misguided attempt to out-facebook Facebook. And so we come to Doge. Dogecoin is a currency. Just like Skype is a communications medium, or a car is a transport device. Imagine for a moment if GM or Ford could ‘upgrade’ the roads so only new cars could drive on them. What would happen to all the old cars, and what would people who couldn’t afford new cars, or simply loved their old ones, do? Microsoft effectively changed the Skype-way, and forced all the old Skypes off the road. And if you couldn’t afford the new model? Bad luck. Dig deep, and buy new hardware, because they said so. And we have already seen the beginnings of this sort of thing in our own corner of the crypto world as well. Apple finally relented and allowed cryptocurrencies onto iDevices. But the

wallets which soon appeared demanded iOS 7, a particularly ugly version of an operating system which runs poorly or not at all on many millions of devices out there. Is your grandma going to throw her iPad in the trash and buy a new one so she can send you Dogecoins for Christmas? Yeah, right... So far, the core devs have done a fantastic job of maintaining very broad compatibility in everything they do. But times they are a-changing. We will be seeing more being piggybacked onto the blockchain, starting with DogeParty, and there is a very real risk that some future developer won’t take enough interest in compatibility and thus lock people out. We should never forget that we are in competition with currencies which are universally usable pieces of paper, plastic or metal that have no minimum system requirements. If we are truly going to become more than just a plaything we need to go to places where shiny new tech is simply not automatically part of the picture. So if you’re writing code, be it for a wallet, an online app, webpage or whatever, always remember the original meaning of KISS:

Keep It Simple, Stupid!

Tip Fulvio: DSE2UNMTUWx6ayCaf1JkDb1nTXKG4y9v6V

{VMW} FULVIOGERARDI <<< 93

Make a Dogevelope! Write a love letter and send it in style with a Dogevelope! You can fill this little paper wallet with your public and private wallet keys, fiat currency (gasp), or any other small treasure. Simply follow the easy instructions on the next page.

Find the template as a download at VeryMuchWow.com

94 >>> DOGEVELOPE {VMW}

DOGE AFTER DARK email DogeAfterDark@VeryMuchWow.com with your midnight rantings and moonlit thoughts...

Middle of the night crazy ideas... Are your legs twitching while you dream? Do you feel like howling at the moon? Send us your Doge After Dark Dreams, Rants, and Moonlit Ideas. A Shibe was inspired to send in this rant after seeing so many fellow shibes leave the comunity. Don’t agree? Send in your own! The Fine Print: Views expressed in DogeAfterDark belong to the writers, not VeryMuchWow.

I miss the old Dogecoin community. We used to have all of these awesome meme pics. We would all get together and donate to charities. I felt proud to be a shibe. Lately, it’s just not fun. This has been going on for a while. 96 >>> DOGE AFTER DARK {VMW}

Remember those hilarious tipping wars? Remember when all of the big names in Doge would be out there kidding with the rest of us? Now they only show up when there’s serious drama. It sucks. Maybe we can do a reset this Dogecoin

Day in December. How about if everyone forgets about how much Doge they have and decides to just have fun for one weekend? Maybe we could all donate to a cool charity project that weekend, too. To the Moon?

with Martha Shibewart

Extract Your Doge’s DNA!

! E C N E I C

S

Clone your doge!

Doge Drool

Every happy home needs a clone! This is my special Fall Craft, and the first step in cloning your doge. The DNA molecule is so small that you can’t normally see it with the naked eye, but if you release the DNA inside thousands of cells at the same time, the molecules become visible because of their sheer number. In this exciting craft project, you will collect some cells from your doge’s drool, break the cells open, release the DNA molecules, and concentrate them in a liquid so that you can see them. It’s best if your doge is a good drooler, as you will need to collect a good tablespoon of the stuff. I know what you’re thinking - your doge drools buckets! You, my friend, can grow a clone army!

“This is living.”

You Need:

“It’s a doge thing.”

• 500 ml (16.9 fluid oz) of drinking water in a large beaker • 1 tablespoon of salt • 1 clear glass, small, with a narrow mouth - I used a whiskey glass • 125 ml (½ cup or 4 oz.) of chilled rubbing alcohol (isopropyl alcohol USP 70%) • blue food coloring • eyedropper • clear dishwashing detergent • stir stick • a tablespoon of your doge’s drool!

of t o A sh on for b bour NA the D ician techn

Water + Drool + Soap

p e t S

e n O

Add the salt to the water inside the beaker and stir until the grains of salt have disappeared. Pour three tablespoons of the water into the small glass. Dribble your doge’s drool into the small glass. Let him watch! Doges love science! Dip the stir stick an inch into the detergent, then gently mix it into the water.

{VMW} MARTHASHIBEWART <<< 99

with Martha Shibewart ! E C N IE

SC

Step Two

You may dump out the salt water inside the beaker. Rinse it and dry it well, then pour in the rubbing alcohol. Add two or three drops of food coloring to the rubbing alcohol and stir well with a clean utensil. The blue food coloring will help you distinguish the alcohol from the water later. At this point, your doge may think you have gone Breaking Bad. Use the eyedropper to drop the rubbing alcohol down along the inside wall of the glass. Try to add the alcohol slowly and very gently, so that the water and the alcohol do not mix. You want the alcohol to form a separate layer on top of the water. It helps to hold the glass at about a 20-degree angle while you do this. (Think about making my holiday cocktails following these instructions!) Add enough rubbing alcohol to create a 2-cm deep layer on top of the water.

Martha loves clones!

Notice the three layers - the DNA collects in the middle I must remember to stop letting my doge clean the glasses with his tongue.

Doge

DNA

Watch the thin strands of DNA gradually collect together in the layer between the water and the alcohol. This process takes about ten minutes. The strands link together and form nets or webs of DNA. Take a good look - it’s a part of your doge that you usually don’t get to see. Even though this looks as yummy as an exotic cocktail, do NOT drink - under any circumstances your doge’s DNA! Instead, make my fabulous Blue Moon cocktail on the next page!

W O W {VMW} MARTHASHIBEWART <<< 101

. . . K N I DR with Martha Shibewart

WOW

Getting tired of drinking warm beer with your Milk Bones? Why not try a drink fit for a shibe? My Blue Moon cocktail will tickle your whiskers with the gentle floral aroma of Creme de Violette. The addition of gin adds a mossy forest undertone. This drink was inspired by Hugo Ensslin’s Aviation recipe - hey, he would have called it a Rocket recipe if he was born a few decades later! You Need: Ice 2 ounces high-quality gin 1/2 ounces Creme de Violette 1/2 ounce freshly squeezed lemon juice Garnish: lemon twist, cherries, and mini umbrella Fill a cocktail shaker with ice. Add gin, Creme de Violette, and lemon juice. Shake and strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish and enjoy! {VMW} MARTHASHIBEWART <<< 103

GAMES FOR SHIBES! WORD SEARCH

find and circle the Dogecoin words!

WORD SCRAMBLE!

W such game O W

COMMUNITY

the only page with ALL comic sans!

Doge Cross

WO W

s d r o w h c su

SUCH CLUES DOWN

ACROSS

1 Home of coin profiteers (9) 2 Race organization that had its mind blown (6) 4 Often measured against this unit (7) 5 Most popular type of thread on the sub (8) 6 Dev with cold, wet hair (4,6) 7 Silly dog on a credit chip (8) 8 Unlike Bitcoin (12) 13 Genus (14) 15 Fury, for ex. (4) 17 100 of these by the end of 2014 (7) 18 Earth’s largest satellite (4) 22 Everyday value (3,4) 23 Where is it? (3) 24 Hometown of Billy Markus (8) 27 Proving the correctness (6) 28 Ol’ Number 98 (4,4) 29 Doge original point (4) 32 Species (5,3) 33 Genesis, for ex. (5) 34 Such magazine (4,4,3) 37 Type of hash function (6) 38 One benefit of cryptocurrency (8) 40 Total value of current coins in existence (6,3) 41 Flashes her doges (6,5) 44 Has a cat; likes to tip (7) 46 Girl who started it all (6)

3 Get it, sell it here (7) 7 98’s archnemesis (6) 9 Requiring work from the requester (5,2,4) 10 Community provided this to Kenyans (5,5) 11 Merge mining advocate (7,3) 12 First merged mining partner (8) 14 Big bro (7) 16 Provides daily pep talk to shibes (4,5) 19 How the algorithms should be used (8) 20 Dogecoins got them there (5) 21 Transaction consensus (12) 25 Exchange abbrev. (4) 26 Likes smiley faces (6) 30 Doge, LTC, BTC are similar in this way (4,6) 31 Half of founding duo (7) 33 Dogecoin’s favorite winter sport (7) 35 Bigger is better? (8) 36 Typeface of choice (5,4) 39 Birthdate (5) 42 Digging (6) 43 Overnight dev competition (9) 45 Branching the binary (4) 47 Give it to others to get (6,3) 48 Community is best known for this (11)

Solve the crossword? Win a Cheese Tray! Input your crossword answers at VeryMuchWow.com between November 115. If you have the correct solution, you will be entered into a drawing to win this fabulous eco-friendly wood-and-temperedglass 10.5” cheese tray! The cutting board is imprinted with our very own WOW Doge!

y c n a f h c u m

{VMW} CROSSDOGE <<< 107