May 4, 2022 (Vol. XXXIV, Is. XII) - Binghamton Review

BINGHAMTON REVIEW Editor-in-Chief Contents

P.O. BOX 6000 BINGHAMTON, NY 13902-6000 EDITOR@BINGHAMTONREVIEW.COM

Founded 1987 • Volume XXXIV, Issue XII Matt Gagliano

Managing Editor Madeline Perez Copy Desk Chief Joe Badalamenti

Business Manager Dillon O’Toole

Social Media Shitposter Arthur O’Sullivan

Editor Emeritus Jake Schweitzer

Staff Writers

Siddharth Gundapaneni Evelyn Medina Shayne O’Loughlin

Contributors Gunga Din

Special Thanks To:

NEXT YEAR’S E-BOARD

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by Our Staff

3 Editorial

by Matt Gagliano 4 Press Watch/Advice Column

by Our Staff 5 Publication Report Card by Our Staff 6 So Long Gay Bowser Binghamton University

by Matt Gagliano 10 Insecurity: Is There a Cure?

by Madeline Perez 12 The College Experience: My Two Cents

by Joe Badalamenti 14 Why The Weather Sucks by Dillon O’Toole 15 Cultural Degeneration and the Fall of

by Gunga Din American Cinema

Intercollegiate Studies Institute Collegiate Network Binghamton Review was printed by Gary Marsden We Provide the Truth.

He Provides the Staples

TELL US WHAT YOU THINK! Direct feedback to editor@binghamtonreview.com 2

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Vol. XXXIV, Issue XII

EDITORIAL Dear Readers,

From the Editor

L

adies and Gentlemen, we made it. The last issue of the year, and my last issue, period. I’d just like to take a moment to thank everyone who’s read this paper over the past few years. You guys… Well, I don’t know you, but since you read Binghamton Review, I assume you’re pretty cool. More importantly, I’d like to thank everyone on the Binghamton Review staff. These issues would not happen without you, and I’ve very much enjoyed working with you all. Well, almost, all of you. You know who you are. Anywho, these past few months have been a blast, and while it’s sad that it’s all coming to an end, I can say with utmost certainty that I’m going out with a bang. (Not literal, as premarital sex is a sin).

Since we all know that I always promote my own writing in the editorial because I’m a narcissist, let’s just get that out of the way first, shall we? I suppose the first thing I should do is give you a warning. WARNING: This issue by Matt Gagliano (titled “So Long Gay Bowser Binghamton University” on page 6) is NOT your typical Matt Gagliano article. It does not feature any “goofs” or “gaffs,” and definitely doesn’t contain any “wisecracks.” This article does not have the witty, sarcastic tone that you have come to expect. Rather, it is an honest review of my time here at Binghamton, and what I’ve learned through it all. It took a while to write, and I’m still unsure as to whether or not I should have left some details out, but maybe give it a read. Hopefully you’ll be able to get something useful out of it.

Other things in this issue: “Insecurity: Is There a Cure?” by Madeline Perez on page 10. The short answer: …Maybe? I guess you’re just going to have to read the article to find out. Get clickbaited. There’s also “The College Experience: My Two Cents” by Joe Badalamenti on page 12. Since he is also graduating, he also decided to write a ‘farewell look back’ article. Copycat. I haven’t read it yet, but Joe has yet to pay me the two cents he said he was going to give me in the title. I need those two cents to pay my rent. If I don’t get them, I’ll be homeless, thirsty, and starving in the great wild west infinite desert, eating tumbleweeds and drinking piss. You see, that was a sly reference to our upcoming video project, The Good, The Based, and The Ugly, which should be released on our YouTube channel shortly after the release of this issue. See the back cover for more info. Regardless, if Joe does not give me the two cents that I’m owed, I will be suing. Your move, Joe. Well, that’s all folks. Thus ends my last editorial. Try not to be sad, my friends (although I know that’s damn near impossible), for this is not the end. Wait, no. This is the end. I literally just said that. Bye everyone, I’ll remember you all in therapy.

Sincerely,

Matt Gagliano Binghamton Review is a non-partisan, student-run news magazine of conservative thought founded in 1987 at Binghamton University. A true liberal arts education expands a student’s horizons and opens one’s mind to a vast array of divergent perspectives. The mark of true maturity is being able to engage with these perspectives rationally while maintaining one’s own convictions. In that spirit, we seek to promote the free and open exchange of ideas and offer alternative viewpoints not normally found or accepted on our predominately liberal campus.

We stand against tyranny in all of its forms, both on campus and beyond. We believe in the principles set forth in this country’s Declaration of Independence and seek to preserve the fundamental tenets of Western civilization. It is our duty to expose the warped ideology of political correctness and cultural authoritarianism that dominates this university. Finally, we understand that a moral order is a necessary component of any civilized society. We strive to inform, engage with, and perhaps even amuse our readers in carrying out this mission.

Views expressed by writers do not necessarily represent the views of the publication as a whole. editor@binghamtonreview.com

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CPampus resswatch “Religion should not be forced onto children” by Kathleen Lion, Pipe Dream, 4/14/22 “In fact, none of us desired to be confirmed into the church but did so because of our parents. Forcing children to join a religion before they can fully grasp the beliefs and practices of a[sic] that religion can be confusing and distressing.”

The language in this article, if not grammatically incorrect, is incredibly loaded, specifically, the process of raising your children according to your religious principles written as “forcing your child to join a religion” Is teaching children proper manners forcing politeness on them?

“This is problematic, as being a part of a religion implies following a set of rules and adopting a strict sense of morality.

By forcing their children into practic-

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Written by our Staff

We know you don’t read the other campus publications, so we did it for you. Original pieces are in quotes, our responses are in bold.

ing a certain religion, individual agency is stripped.”

Rules? Strict morality? So you’re saying I can’t be a licentious asshole while also properly following a religion? The horror!!

“For this reason, parents should create an environment where beliefs other than their own are acceptable. Most importantly, children should feel comfortable practicing a different religion or no religion at all, if that is what they believe. This can be done if parents expose children to multiple religions and show support for whichever, if any, their child feels connected with.”

This proposed solution is incredibly idealistic and practically impossible.

Not only is it impossible for parents to accurately explain every different religion accurately without bias to their children, but they would have

no reason to do so since they likely believe that their religion is true.

Even the idea that chi ldren should be raised in an environment open to different religions is short sighted because children are dumb, they’ll believe anything. It’s simply more rational to raise children according to your own religious principles, and let them decide when they are older.

Advice Column

By Madeline Perez and Dillon O’Toole

I

offered to give you all life advice. These were your questions.

“I was thinking about whether it would be wise to drop out of college and become a Ukrainian mercenary?”

Unless you have received some form of military training it would not be wise to become a Ukrainian mercenary. Volunteering without the proper training can only lead to bad results, no matter how good your intentions may be. Unless you’re volunteering to freely give me a thousand dollars, of which there are no possible downsides.

“I’m gay. Thoughts?”

So’s everyone. So’s my cat. So’s this couch. Got anything original? In all seriousness, accepting yourself is one of the most important things you can do. It’s impossible to be truly happy if you can’t accept who you really are. Besides, it’s not like being gay changes anything about the person you are… or does it?

“I want to die. Thoughts?”

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Here at the bing review, the only free-speech publication on campus, we value freedom. Freedom is being able to do what you want! I think thoughts are your biggest problem right now. You see, if you don’t think, you can’t think about dying.

So the obvious way to solve this problem is to lobotomize yourself so you never have to think again.

“My tits are literally so perfect it has become a burden.

Thoughts?”

Wow. This one really resonated with me. It’s a cruel world for the perfectly-titted: a never-ending onslaught of bitter sideeyes from middle-aged elderly women, envious of youth, as well as barbaric gaping men who can’t help but ‘awooga’ woefully at your passing by. At times it seems you can only find refuge in other people afflicted with this curse. Rest easy, boobied-one, because after you find those people the proverbial breast cross becomes so much easier to bear.

Need life advice? Email Manager@binghamtonreview.com for more wacky, quirky, and zany responses.

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PUBLICATION REPORT CARD

Publication Report Card

By Our Staff

W

ith the spring semester coming to a close, it’s time to look back on the work of Binghamton’s college publications and grade them accordingly.

Pipe Dream: C Within this year, we saw, for better or worse, Pipe Dream return to printing physical issues. Unfortunately, their stacks are always full because (you know the lines). In terms of content, it’s been more of the same: boring “news articles” and cringy opinion articles competing for the dullest take of the year. I’ll be real, the only time I focused on Pipe Dream for more than 5 seconds was when I was aghast at their sex issue. To have a whole issue criticizing topics like the needless sexualization of women, while the paper was laden with (what I’m assuming are your female writers) real women posing in their underwear with their heads cut off. Tasteful. With all this in mind, we decided to give Binghamton’s most mediocre paper the most mediocre grade: a C, not even a C-, just a C. Free Press: CThe grade for this year could only go up, and 2 issues over the course of 2 semesters is infinitely more content than was produced last year. Looking back on your past work, I have to say we’re disappointed. There’s been a clear drop in production value over the years: busy graphics, artwork that looks like it’s been traced, and most sinfully, referring to the phrase “vaginal discharge” as queer lingo. Yeah, that’s right. I did the word search. Some of the poems were acutely disappointing as they had me wondering whether or not your editor hates you or if they, too, didn’t catch the fact that the poems had spelling errors and quality ranging from mediocre to “I’d like to hang myself now, please.” They also refuse to capitalize their i’s, which made us sad. But, I mean, what else would you expect from an anti-capitalist paper?

Bing Butt: D We know we’re grading a little harshly here, but truthfully, we like to play around with the Butt. The sharpest criticism is that the disparity between the quality of the headlines vs. the quality of the actual content is like a slap to the face. Or, a slap to the Butt, if you will. When reading the satire articles found in the Bing Butt, one would expect to crack a few laughs when reading their articles (some knee slappers if you will). Unfortunately, the attempts at humor are not enough for these high IQ Bing review staff members. As always, we’re gonna have to give the Butt ‘the D.’

editor@binghamtonreview.com

Happy Medium: B“Happy” isn’t an accurate description of the paper, but “medium” certainly is. Though your papers are credibly sourced, I don’t want to feel like I’m doing more homework in my independent reading time. With a name that leaves you wondering: is this a college publication or are they just describing my penis?

Happy Medium is a serious publication that publishes serious articles on mainly serious topics such as politics. Compared to Pipe Dream, the other serious paper, there is only so much you can do. However, given the increase in quality of Happy Medium, compared to Pipe Dream, we thought that they deserve a slightly higher mark.

Asian Outlook B+ Having published only one issue this year, I have to say I’m a bit saddened by the lack of content to work with, (though you do get points for it being 26 pages. Goddamn.) From what I have seen from the fall issue, we at Binghamton Review are impressed. Quality written and edited articles with a wide range of topics, formatted within beautifully edited pages that incorporate the messages at hand. However, you do get points off for the amount of old Asian Outlooks I’ve seen around campus.

They go all the way back to 2011! That was ten years ago. Don’t you know that’s self-plagiarism? At this point, you should be calling it ‘Asian lookback’ just for consistency’s sake. Also, Genshin Impact is cringe, -5 points.

Binghamton Review: A+++ Well, what did you expect? Were the only paper to consistently print 6 issues a semester while maintaining high-quality articles: serious, satire, and the heavenly in-between. One could argue we should be getting an “F” for “fucks,” which is exactly what we do. The Binghamton Review Fucks. Not only do we have amazing and colorful covers that tickle the mind and high-quality videos on our youtube channel that would have at least a 98% on rotten tomatoes, we also value everyone’s opinion, so anyone can get published. Yes, that’s right. Even you.

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SO LONG GAY BOWSER BINGHAMTON UNIVERSITY

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So Long Gay Bowser Binghamton University

By Matt Gagliano

W

hat’s up gamers. Normally I would punctuate that sentence with an exclamation point, however this time, that “what’s up gamers” is somewhat somber. You see, I am graduating in a few weeks, and this will be my last article as a member of Binghamton Review and as a student of Binghamton University. As the editor-in-chief, I feel like I should follow in the footsteps of the previous editors and write a reflection on my time here and give some parting advice for those just joining the Binghamton community. I was originally unsure what approach to take with this article, seeing as everything I’ve written in my three years with the Review has had a sarcastic, comedic tone to it; obviously, something like this should be serious, otherwise, people will be unsure what’s actual advice and what’s just me being stupid. For a while, I wrestled with what to write here: What’s oversharing? What’s too vague? What’s the point of sharing anything if people probably won’t be in the same position I was in anyway? Eventually, I came to this conclusion: if sharing my college experience can possibly be of any help to anyone reading this, then it’s worth it. Even if only one person takes anything away from this article, then I will have achieved my goal.

Now then, where to start? I guess I should start at the beginning: move-in day. I remember move-in pretty well. I was living in a five-person suite in Hinman (the RA suite), and I hadn’t talked to any of my suitemates yet. I knew literally nothing about the people that I was about to live with for an entire year, so naturally, I was extremely nervous. My brother had told me a bunch of stories about how much fun he had when he lived in a suite in Hinman, and how well he got along with most of his suitemates. That’s the idea I had in my mind when I picked my housing and every moment up until move-in. It was only once I actually began to move in that I began to have doubts. What if my suitemates are mean? What if they don’t like me? What if they’re really clumsy and they accidentally end up burning down the entire building? Once I met my suitemates, I began to calm down a little bit. They seemed nice enough.

Throughout the first few days, they would always try to talk to me and invite me to hang out with them and their friends. My actual roommate didn’t show up until four days after the rest of us moved in. We didn’t talk much, as he was rarely ever in our room, which is a shame, because he seemed like a really nice guy. I wish I had talked to him more, as he was probably the only person in that suite that I could see myself being friends with. “What about the other suitemates,” you may ask, “you said they were pretty friendly.” They were, for a time. After a few days they stopped trying to talk to me and stopped inviting me to things, so I guess I was right with the whole “what if they don’t like me” thing.

After about a week of being in Binghamton, I was already struggling to find my place. I didn’t talk to my suitemates at all, I hadn’t made any friends, and I hardly spent any time outside of my dorm room, besides the time spent in class. It was at that moment, when I thought things couldn’t possibly be going any

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worse, that things got much, much worse. It was a Friday morning, the second week of classes was just about to wrap up. We had a three-day weekend, so I was looking forward to taking some time to relax. Unfortunately, my body had other plans. I woke up that morning at 7 am, well before my alarm went off, feeling a slight pain in my stomach that was growing stronger by the second. I downed a few Tums and tried my best to go back to sleep. No such luck. By 8 am I was kneeling over the toilet, spewing my guts up. This is where I stayed until one of my roommates knocked on the bathroom door around 9, wanting to use the shower. I spent most of my time that Friday and Saturday in the bathroom, everything that had ever been put in my body making a mad dash toward any available exit. I had been talking to my parents non-stop throughout this whole ordeal, and eventually, I was able to convince my dad to pick me up and take me home. That Sunday, I tried to slowly replenish the food and water that my body had just spent the past two days expelling. After three Saltine crackers and a few sips of water, my body had decided it had had enough and rejected that which I had just consumed. No matter how much I tried, I was unable to keep any food or liquid in my body, which was a problem, because I had now gone three full days without eating or drinking immediately after draining all food and water from my system. Every part of my body was aching. Any small movement resulted in cramping and pain. Quite frankly, I felt like I was dying. And if I’m being honest, I probably was.

“It took only two weeks of eating dining hall food to give me food poisoning bad enough to put me in the hospital. Thanks, Sodexo!”

On Monday, my mom finally convinced me to go to the doctor. We went to a walk-in clinic, and I guess I looked as bad as I felt, because the doctor took one look at me and then told me to go to the hospital. After a long day of hospital procedures and tests, I spent a few hours in a hospital bed, hooked up to an IV drip to get some fluid back in my system. After some more time, they had me try to eat some crackers, which I was finally able to keep down. All of the tests they ran seemed to indicate that there was nothing wrong with me, so that left only one option for the diagnosis: food poisoning. It took only two weeks of eating dining hall food to give me food poisoning bad enough to put me in the hospital. Thanks, Sodexo!

Surely, the worst of it was over now, right? How could things possibly get worse than that? Well, let me tell you. After I was healthy enough, my dad drove me back to Binghamton, where I once again spent all of my time alone in my dorm, doing nothing and talking to no one. I was certainly miserable when I was sick and in the hospital, but at least then I had my parents with me. Spending all that time alone made me feel awful, which in turn made me not want to do anything. As you can probably guess, a cycle started to form, a cycle that would result

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BINGHAMTONREVIEW.COM in the worst mental state I have ever been in. The longer time went on, the worse it got. I spent many days just lying in bed, doing nothing but thinking about how miserable I felt. Eventually, it got to a point where I couldn’t even find the motivation to get out of bed to shower, or to get something to eat. There were many nights where I would lay awake at night, counting the seconds until I got to leave this hellhole and go back home.

I thought that Binghamton was the cause of all of my problems and that, as soon as I got out of here, everything would be sunshine and rainbows. Never once did it cross my mind that what had really happened is that I had fallen into a depressive state and that a simple change in location would not be enough to fix it.

Now, I would like to take this moment to address any of my family and friends who may be reading this, as that last paragraph was most likely news to you. At the time, I assumed that everything would be better once I left Binghamton, and I didn’t want anyone to waste their time worrying about me, so I just kept my mouth shut. Anytime anyone would ask how I was doing, I would always say that I was fine, even though that couldn’t have been further from the truth. To this day, I’ve only ever actually told one person, but I think enough time has passed now that I’m able to discuss it, especially if talking about it can help other people.

Throughout this whole ordeal, the one thing that could get me out of bed, the one shining point in the sea of darkness, as stupid as it sounds to admit it, was Binghamton Review. I attended almost every meeting, and enjoyed every second, as this was the only time I spent interacting with other people freshman year. The people I met here were the closest thing I had to friends at the time, and I never would have imagined how close I would become with some of them; that they would end up being the thing most responsible for getting me out of my depressive state.

I’m getting a little ahead of myself here. Let’s discuss the elephant in the room, the thing that had a major impact on all of our college experiences: COVID-19. The school shut down entirely and sent us home halfway through the spring semester of my freshman year. At the time, it seemed like a blessing to me, and, in a way, it was. It opened my eyes to the fact that there was something seriously wrong with me. Isn’t that what they always say, “the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem?” Well, I got what I wanted: I was home. I was out of the nightmare that was Binghamton University and yet… I still felt miserable. I still spent most of my days doing absolutely nothing. Nothing had changed. That’s when I realized that nothing was going to change unless I made it change. I had two options: I could lay in my bed and wallow in self-pity for the rest of my life, thinking about how awful my life is, or I could get off my ass and make it better. I went with the latter. As much as I didn’t feel like doing anything, I forced myself to get out of bed. I tried thinking about all of the things I used to enjoy and forced myself to do them. I tried my hardest to keep my brain occupied so that it didn’t have time to think about how much everything sucked. I started playing video games again. I remembered how much I liked making videos with my friends, so I started a YouTube channel. I realized that my sleep schedule was all out of whack, so I started setting an alarm to wake

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SO LONG GAY BOWSER BINGHAMTON UNIVERSITY

up earlier, and exercising more so that going to sleep at night would be easier.

I’d like to say that all of this made me better, but it didn’t.

It had some impact, sure, but I still wasn’t happy. Then, sophomore year started. Due to the food poisoning the dining hall had given me freshman year, I decided to get an apartment off-campus so that I could cook my own meals. My brother still had another semester at Binghamton before he graduated, so he was living with me. At the time, he was the editor-in-chief of the Review, and due to COVID, we didn’t have an office. Therefore, our apartment became the Binghamton Review office. At first, I hated the idea, but ultimately, it became the best thing for me. You see, since people were coming to my apartment, I couldn’t flake out. I couldn’t decide that I wasn’t feeling up to it.

I had no choice but to attend. In addition to weekly meetings and production nights, my brother also started the tradition of “Saturdays,” a small gathering at our apartment on Saturday nights to play beer pong, jackbox games, and of course, drink excessively.

Over time, I realized that these kinds of interactions with friends were exactly what I was missing. Obviously, I didn’t get better overnight, but spending more and more time with people that genuinely care about me was exactly what I needed to pull me out of that funk. To everyone who’s been such a great friend to me over these past few years, I would just like to say thank you. You guys are the best.

It was about a few weeks into the Spring 2021 semester in which I truly began to feel happy again. And I suppose luck had decided that I had been through enough because as soon as I felt normal again, I was introduced to the most wonderful, perfect girl I have ever met. At first, I was scared to talk to her, as I felt that rejection could send me right back into the spiral of mental health problems that I had just dug my way out of.

But if I realized anything over this whole debacle, it’s that sitting around doing nothing will only make things worse. I am now the happiest I have ever been. I have the best friends anyone could ever ask for, and the best girlfriend that anyone could ever ask for. I think about the fact that I’m graduating in a few weeks and I get sad because I wish I could stay here forever.

Looking back on it now, it’s hard to believe that there was a time when I couldn’t wait to graduate. I guess that’s just a testament to how far I’ve come.

So, what was the point of writing all of this? Well, that’s for you to decide. I’m simply telling my story so that you may learn from it what you will. I suppose if I had to give out some advice, it would be this: do things. Get out there. Meet some people.

Join a club. Go to a party. I promise you, there are people out there that you will fit in with, but you’re never going to find them if you’re busy wallowing alone in your bed.

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NEXT YEAR’S E-BOARD

Next Year’s E-Board

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By Our Staff

Editor-In-Chief: Madeline Perez Howdy, faithful Bing Review readers! I, Madeline Perez, am back for yet another wildly successful year on the E-board. While it was a great honor being Managing Editor, in order to fulfill my lifelong dream of running a dictatorship, I knew I had to brutally murder Matt, put an end to the “Gagliano Dynasty” that has rocked this paper for the last 3 years, and become Editor-in-Chief. After spending the last 2 years on the e-board, I feel I’ve successfully infiltrated the club. They really think I’m one of them! With all the information I’ve collected, I am finally ready to take charge, publish the greatest and most interesting issues known to man, and provide gentle constructive feedback to contributors, all while ruling with an iron fist! I can’t wait to use the new e-board like pawns in the great chess match that is maintaining a college publication, once I figure out how a computer works!

Managing Editor: Dillon O’Toole Hello everyone, I am Dillon O’Toole, your new Managing Editor.

For those who don’t know me, I am a Physics major, rising senior, and the current Business Manager of Binghamton Review (whose introduction was suspiciously absent from last year’s introductions).

For those who do know me, you may be asking “what happened to the beard?’ To which I’d respond, it’ll probably be back by next semester. If having hobbies were allowed in the Review, I would be busy watching cars turn left and failing at video games. Next year you can expect me to continue being a great speller, and hopefully not disappoint you all with my emails.

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NEXT YEAR’S E-BOARD

Copy Desk Chief: Shayne O’Loughlin There is an idea of a Shayne O’Loughlin, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable: I simply am not there.

Business Manager: Siddharth Gundapaneni Hey, what’s up, I’m Siddharth Gundapaneni and I’ll be the Binghamton Review’s new Business Manager! Disclaimer: I am making no promises that I will not launder club money for my own illicit intents and purposes. Anyways, I’m currently studying economics and math with the hope to indoctrinate children one day as a professor. The Binghamton Review has served as my training grounds for spewing propaganda with the hopes of bringing some uniformed young adults to the dark side. I hope to continue my plans throughout the following year, holding down the anchor of the Review’s dwindling political articles by providing insightful commentaries on general economic theory and principles, as well as contemporary policies I take issue with - doubt there’s anything I’ll like anytime soon. Hope y’all like what we have in store for next year!

Social Media Shitposter: Arthur O’Sullivan Arthur “A-Dog” O’Sullivan is a sophomore Biology/Classics double major. He enjoys writing articles on center-right politics, art, and holiday-themed fiction. He needs a girlfriend.

editor@binghamtonreview.com

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INSECURITY: IS THERE A CURE?

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Insecurity: Is There a Cure?

By Madeline Perez

I

’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that you, reader, have an insecurity. Maybe you think you’re ugly, or maybe unlovable; possibly even sexually dysfunctional. Why not all three!

Everyone is insecure about something unless they’re not smart enough to know how to doubt themselves, like toddlers. Actually, do toddlers have insecurities? I’m not sure on that one, so don’t quote me on anything. Anyway, it’s my belief that insecurity is one of the only feelings that has no social utility. Many negative emotional states, though convoluted, have roots in purpose. Anxiety (the feeling) is often an important motivator necessary for success, survival, or some other third s-word. A slight depression after some negative life change, forcing you to pause and forget your responsibilities, can at times be crucial to properly cope with what happened and start to heal. Guilt and regret, while closely related to insecurity, serve an important situational purpose in understanding when you’ve done something “wrong” or hurt someone else (duh). Though annoying as they can be, these feelings mean you’re not a sociopath and are capable of feeling a little something I made up that I like to call “empathy.”

While guilt focuses on feeling bad about something you did, insecurity is often feeling bad about something you are. A consistent, never-ending selfguilt that’s pointed inward and makes you desperate for relief. Regular guilt has a purpose - you can change your actions; what’s the point of feeling bad about yourself?

“Do they love me? Do they really care about me? Will they leave me when they figure out what a worthless leech I am, sucking the happiness from their life like some sort of deranged, rabid, happy-sucking vampire? ” 10

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Insecurity is not an acknowledgment of self-awareness. Often, people are insecure about things that either aren’t real or don’t really matter (double duh). People will often bring up or apologize for some minute insecurity to try and prove they’re “self-aware,” transparently attacking themselves first before others can. This can lead to some uncomfortable situations, one of which I will now demonstrate through a hypothetical.

If I’m insecure about my big feet (which I’m not, my feet aren’t even big), bringing it up around other people won’t make them think “oh, well at least she knows about it, so that makes it alright.” What it actually does is draw attention to the fact that I’m insecure.

Now, these other people are in a position where they can truthfully agree with me, which will crush me, disagree to spare my insecurity, or awkwardly stay silent, wishing they never entered this conversation in the first place. Chances are, you’ve been in this situation before. Chances are, you’ve put others in this situation before, it’s happened to the best of us. There’s no shame in having insecurities, but girl, this is not a good color on you.

Other people shouldn’t have to pay the price for your insecurities.

They need to be fixed from the inside, and not the outside, which means it’s kind of up to you. Getting that amazing feeling when someone compliments something you’re insecure about isn’t really a good thing; it’s indicative of some larger problem. It’s not healthy to be that desperate to hear words to fill that insecurity hole inside your chest. It’s actually never healthy to have a hole in your chest! I get it; when you are insecure about something, and I mean deeply insecure, a word on the contrary from the right person can be more alluring than the finest crack money can buy. Insecurity breeds desperation, which festers and maggots its way through relationships like swissed cheese. Do they love me? Do they really care about me? Will they leave me when

they figure out what a worthless leech I am, sucking the happiness from their life like some sort of deranged, rabid, happy-sucking vampire?

I don’t think being insecure is anyone’s fault. In some cases, the insecurity is directly brought on by other people and how they treat you. Maybe you keep questioning if that person loves you because you know on some level they’re not treating you like they do, and instead of confronting them about it you label yourself as unlovable. Maybe you’ve been told having big feet is bad by a cruel society, and rather than recognizing that there’s nothing inherently wrong with it you blame yourself because society can feel like seven billion against one sometimes, and how can I win with those odds? The trick to insecurity is looking outward instead of inward; what situation was I in that is making me worry about this? Was it a realistic criticism of something I need to change, or is it a harmless trait that makes no sense fretting over? Is this hurting anybody? Is it something I can change if I wanted to?

Is it even real? This can be borderline impossible to solve quickly, especially if you’re reversing years of mistreatment, teasing, or belittlement. But give it time. No one should spend all day worrying whether they’re unlovable or deserving of friendship. You’re not the vague and archetypal “bad person” every good person thinks they are.

Now that you’ve learned to analyze why you’re insecure, you need to figure out how to stop that insecurity from self-propagating. What’s most

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BINGHAMTONREVIEW.COM important is framing others’ behaviors in ways that don’t reflect on you, which I will now demonstrate with a little game: Oh god, my friend canceled again! Is it because: A. They’re lying about being my friend B. They secretly hate me and talk about me behind my back C. Something came up and they didn’t have time D. They’re plotting to kill me Chances are, 95% of the time the answer is C (which it always is). People have tons of reasons for going about their lives that have nothing to do with you! Maybe they were snappy because they were having a bad day. Maybe they’re in pain. Maybe their dog just got carried away by a hawk and they need to break the news to their other pets. Framing the situation differently can help make you stop being all weird and sweaty all the time. Frankly, I won’t lie; there is the off chance that the answer was A, B, or D, and your

“You are driving down the highway when you see a rather large pickup truck. Upon closer inspection, you see that it has steel ornamental balls hanging from the bumper, otherwise known as truck nuts. Oh yeah, you think to yourself. That guy has a small penis. ” friend canceled for some malicious reason. Still, you shouldn’t worry! It’s up to other people to be upfront and honest about their intentions- not up to you to try and figure out how people “really feel” about you. If your friends and acquaintances didn’t want to be around you, they wouldn’t. But what if I’m putting them in a position where they feel the need to hang out with me if I ask? What if I’m secretly bothering them? I’ll keep it real, homie, it’s their own responsibility to put their needs above yours or tell you if something’s wrong. That’s just basic decency. And

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INSECURITY: IS THERE A CURE? if someone is plotting to kill you, I think that reflects more on them than on you.

Your traits are a part of you. They don’t make you good or bad, they just simply exist. This might be difficult for some to understand, but there is nothing inherently wrong with being chubby or ugly or too talkative or uptight or most other traits. Who gets hurt by you being the ugliest fish in the fishbowl? Everyone has a trait others see as negative, but those traits are crucial to being a fully-fledged human being.

Chances are you might just find people who think your trait is endearing.

You should never apologize for trends in your character. Sorry for being so talkative, I just don’t know when to shut up sometimes. Am I being annoying?

I’m annoying, aren’t I. No! Stop that!

You’re not being self-aware by berating yourself in front of others and if you actually thought what you were doing was that bad, you probably wouldn’t be doing it in the first place. You should apologize for actions, not personality traits. If other people don’t like you, it’s, again, up to them to remove themself from the situation. You’re not as bad as you think you are. Although, what most people do find insufferable is being put in a position where they feel forced to give you a compliment.

Apologies indicate you regret what you did and are committed to not doing it again, and you can’t commit to not being yourself in the future (triple duh).

By apologizing for your own insecurities, you are making the apology about yourself rather than the person you’re apologizing to. Now, they’re back in the position from earlier, unsure on whether to agree with you, contradict you, or simply blow their brains out.

You are driving down the highway when you see a rather large pickup truck. Upon closer inspection, you see that it has steel ornamental balls hanging from the bumper, otherwise known as truck nuts. Oh yeah, you think to yourself. That guy has a small penis. Overcompensation, however funny it can be, is begot from insecurity. The logical conclusion of trying to hide some perceived personal failure.

How could I not be masculine? Look, even my truck has balls! Overcompensation can be very sad to watch from the sidelines, some last flailings to the universe to prove not only to others but to yourself. Look world! I’m not the thing I’m scared I might be! Most of the time all it does is tell others insecurities you might not even be aware of yourself. And that’s a scary thought.

An insecurity so deep-rooted you don’t even realize you have it.

The truth is, being insecure will not only hurt you, but insecure people are more likely to hurt others. They project their worries, fight with others… have even known to be defensive at times, and sometimes can be in a denial so deep they threaten to drown everyone with them. The only way to fix insecurity is to do some reflecting, change the things you want to, and accept everything else. You shouldn’t always be aiming for change- sometimes you just need to aim for peace.

Peace with yourself. Peace with others.

Piece of cake! Making peace with the world as it is can help you stop being needlessly insecure, and you have your whole life to do it! So why not get started now? I remember what it was like to be insecure… tough times! Good thing I grew out of that.

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THE COLLEGE EXPERIENCE: MY TWO CENTS

BINGHAMTONREVIEW.COM

The College Experience: My Two Cents

By Joe Badalamenti

I

t’s finally over. At time of writing, I am less than four weeks from graduation, the culmination of four years of college life. Now that I’ve reached this stage, I can finally write my obligatory graduation advice article. Not to brag but most advice found in advice articles tends to be either painfully obvious (not that the advice presented here isn’t obvious) or revolve around the meaning of a vague at best, harmful at worst platitude such as the all too common “jUsT Be yOuRsELf ”. If that’s what you’re looking for, then go read Pipe Dream’s annual senior columns.

This article will take the form of a general and practical guide to not wasting the remaining years of your education.

Some of the major criticisms of college consist of the idea that “You’re wasting four years learning nothing while going into debt.” I disagree, but I do believe that there is a right and wrong way to go through college, hence why I am writing this article.

“But why take my advice?” you may ask. While I would love to discuss all of my credentials and accomplishments from my five page CV, let’s just leave it at the fact that I’m graduating and you’re (likely) not. For the 25% of you are graduating, you can simply take notes on what you should’ve done these past four years.

Let’s start with the reason you came here in the first place: education. For the majority of your time in college, you will either be in class, studying, or working on something related to your education in some way, so you should have the right attitude for your academics. First, you should create two to three relevant academic goals which correlate with your major.

If you don’t have a major or are unsure, then you should focus on settling that as soon as you can. If you’re studying Engineering, Business, Accounting, or some practical field of study, then your goals should relate to gaining experience in your field. If you’re not lucky enough to get an internship, then professional clubs, research, and personal

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projects should provide a similar experience. This should help you stand out among the hundreds of thousands of other students with the same degree.

If you’re in a theoretical field or plan on pursuing an advanced degree, then you should focus on learning the core concepts and principles in your field of interest. This would involve not only reading your coursework texts indepth but also reading books, research articles, and other supplemental media that allow you to get a good grip on these concepts. Once you have a solid understanding of these concepts, you can put this knowledge to good use through teaching/tutoring, writing academic papers, or some other means. If you’re in a broad field such as Biology or History, then it may also be beneficial to find and specialize in a sub-area of expertise. Taking History as an example, there is Classical History, Medieval History, American History, Archeology, and many more subfields within the broad category of History. Again, this should be done to both stand out among other students and to make your education more enjoyable as you study the subjects that most interest you. While these goals may not be mandatory for graduation, you still ought to pursue them. If you take responsibility for your education, then you’ll wind up with a solid understanding of your field despite any obstacles or inconsistencies with your college education.

While academics and professional activities may play a large role, you are likely going to want a social life during your several years at college.

Binghamton, being a large university, offers a large number of communities or clubs for you to join. It is within these that I have had much of my significant social experiences in university. However, you can’t (or shouldn’t) join every club and not all clubs are created equal, so you’ll ideally want to join 2-4 of the best clubs available.

Moreover, with the exception of UFest, some clubs may do little advertising

in person, so you may have to seek out these clubs online. Which clubs to join is up to you (except for Binghamton Review, baby), however, these clubs should encourage your development as well as build skills and virtues rather than degrade these qualities.

While you can just leave a community mid-way to save time to join another, it’s much easier to find a few good communities and stick with them.

Binghamton Review for example will enhance the quality of your writing as well as teach you the importance of communication, analysis, and planning among other skills. You’ll have to spend some time in each club to determine if they are worth your time. One reliable method to do this is to determine the character of the members of the executive board (E-board) as not only are they the most well respected but are the ones literally in charge of the club. If you want a balanced spread of communities, you can join: a physical/athletic club to build fortitude, a professional club to enhance your career development, an extracurricular club to build skills indirectly related to your career and for leisure of course, and a religious club for spiritual guidance and support. Again what clubs or communities you join are up to you, but if you join the right communities, you will end up well rounded as a result.

At this point, you should know your career and secondary goals as well as what to do to achieve them.

You might realize that you may not

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BINGHAMTONREVIEW.COM have the time to keep up with classwork, extracurriculars, and any other activities, leisure or not, that you may have. This isn’t a bad thing, being able to take up so many responsibilities is a sign of progress. When you do reach this point, you should try to maintain consistent progress on academic goals while also making sure not to neglect your social life. This leaves you with two choices: do nothing and struggle to get things done while maintaining a healthy schedule, or make adjustments to balance your schedule. One of the best techniques to learn is to plan out each week. As your schedule gets busier, good planning becomes more and more valuable as you make much more use of your time each day. Planning should consist of at minimum keeping track of important events, deadlines, and other tasks along with the date and time at which they occur. You could also have a more regimented schedule in which you detail everything to be done at specific times, However, this comes at the expense of flexibility which is valuable for dealing with events that pop up out of nowhere. Speaking of trade-offs, an important lesson to learn is the concept of the opportunity cost: the reality that time that can be spent doing one thing is lost at the expense of the thing you are currently doing. For example, while writing this article, I face the opportunity cost of either relaxing or doing something more relevant to my studies depending on when I am writing this article. The key takeaway is to be aware of your opportunity costs, while also being confident in your schedule to meet your needs and your goals without experiencing any symptoms of FOMO. With this lesson in mind, along with efficient planning, your time management worries will begin to fade away.

While not directly related to the college experience, if you do not have a full-ride scholarship, then one can assume that you aren’t going here for free.

Depending on your circumstances, as well as your goals, this could be a small issue or a large concern in your academic journey. Being an in-state student only pursuing a bachelor’s degree, debt has only been a small concern for

editor@binghamtonreview.com

THE COLLEGE EXPERIENCE: MY TWO CENTS me. Though, recognizing the severity of the issue, especially given soaring college tuition costs, I would like to give some advice to students who do face this issue. Much like academics, you will need to set a goal relevant to your financial situation and take steps to reach this goal. In this case, you may have to seek out financial aid, or even take up a part-time job. Whatever the case, It will take up time in your busy schedule. On the bright side, overcoming this obstacle should guarantee you financial independence and all the benefits that come with it.

If you made it this far, you’ll have probably noticed the recurring themes of growth and development throughout this article. This is not a mistake; the primary benefit of attending a university is not your degree, your new friends, or even the new knowledge you obtain, but changing for the better. Most students will attend college in their late teens. At this time an adolescent will have reached the point at which they can perform most tasks independently, though they are still years away from the maturity that separates children from adults. To quote the description found in all issues under the editorial: “A true liberal arts education expands a student’s horizons and opens one’s mind to a vast array of divergent perspectives. The mark of true maturity is being able to engage with these perspectives rationally while maintaining one’s convictions.”

This quote is brilliantly written as it describes both what growth is and how Binghamton Review facilitates it. It is also important to learn how to grow. While you have undoubtedly grown since childhood, you might not have thought much about it. The process is simple: you go through a series of tasks or obstacles to achieve a goal resulting in either success or failure.

At the end of this journey, you find yourself changed by the accumulation of new experiences. Failure to achieve goals can often be an even greater experience than success, so don’t be afraid to fail or pursue goals that will likely fail (unless you end up grievously injured or accused of a crime, then maybe do some risk-assessments). As

sublime as it is, growth is a slow process, meaning in the short term you’ll only notice incremental improvements, though in the long term, it will compound such that you’ll become a completely different person.

As I stated at the beginning of the article, there is a right and wrong way to go through college. The core of this is that growth and change are not guaranteed. It may be the case that one will become more decadent and out of touch with reality. This is increasingly the case today with the decay of civil society. To resist these temptations, you should obtain a solid moral framework and principles. Surrounding yourself with mature and virtuous individuals is another way to ensure that you’re heading in the right direction.

In a Binghamton Review article from before my time, the author, discussing the success of various Review writers (they had been elected to executive positions in the SA), had written that this success was not inevitable, but a result of the drive and ambition of the writers and editors of Binghamton Review.

Looking back at the accomplishments of former editors, it’s clear that they had qualities that made them successful. To imitate these qualities is to not only embody them but to respect those who came before you.

The last piece of advice I have is to live in the moment. This is one that even I have been guilty of not doing but one of high importance. While the past and the future may seem better than today, the past is the past, it will always be there, and the future is the future, it is unwritten and uncertain.

You only live in the present so better make the most out of what you have.

Follow this advice and you’ll likely be in the top 1% of students. Well, that’s all for now, this is Joe Badalamenti signing out (jk I’ll be back next year in article form probably).

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WHY THE WEATHER SUCKS

WhyThe Weather Sucks

By Dillon O’Toole

I

was originally intending to close out this semester with another article that tells you what new music I have been listening to lately, cleverly disguised as an article claiming to be about the best music released in 2022.

Instead, it has come to my attention that a more pressing matter is in need of broader attention, one which affects the entire population of Binghamton University and the rest of Broome County. I am, of course, talking about the infamous Binghamton weather.

Now, before I completely lose you, dear reader, let me explain myself further.

You see, the weather in Binghamton is being used by the federal government in a massive experiment.

“I mean, how could an administration be so incompetent or stupid that they would willingly let classes continue when the roads and campus are in such a condition to endanger not only commuters but also the people who live on campus.”

When you hear the words “weather” and “government experiment” in the same sentence, many of you may immediately think of HAARP. For those unaware, HAARP is a government program established to study the ionosphere and the potential for ionospheric radio communications and surveillance. It is also a prime target for conspiracy theories due to its location in a remote part of Alaska. Many of these theories involve the government’s ability to control and weaponize the weather. I am not here to claim that the government can control the weather, as all scientific evidence points to the contrary. I am here to claim that the weather in upstate New York is shitty enough to justify an experiment on how this weather impacts the people who experience

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it. It just so happens that New York is a perfect location for an example of this magnitude, as it is large enough that the weather can vary by quite a bit depending on where you are located.

And to top it off, the state even has a bunch of unsuspecting test subjects they can use. I am, of course, talking about us students in the SUNY system.

The use of the SUNY system as a way to gather test subjects is actually quite ingenious. You see, since SUNY

“Yeah, the school is definitely part of an experiment. No one is that incompetent. ” schools are a less expensive option for college, many students in New York will attend one of these schools instead of private schools. This guarantees that there will be people moving to different areas of the state every year, which allows more accurate comparisons of how the weather is affecting people since there is a baseline location to compare it to. Additionally, since these are state schools, the employees are employees of the state, thus making it easier to conduct and coordinate an experiment of this size.

You may be wondering why college students are the ideal candidates.

Well, this comes down to several factors. First, it’s easy to get them to agree to the experiment as the clause giving consent is attached to the “confirm enrollment” button, which everyone is required to click in order to attend.

Second, since there are always new students every year, the experiment can track data on continuous generations of students. Finally, college students are prominent on social media and will complain about the weather, making data collection even easier.

These last two points are the most crucial. Being able to track how the weather has been affecting people of the same age group over the course of decades provides plenty of statisti-

cal data points to analyze, something that the nerds in the government love.

Additionally, the prevalence of social media in today’s world has saved the government millions as they no longer have to spend as much on surveillance drones disguised as birds (when was the last time you saw a bird on campus? Also, please refer to “Birds aren’t real” by Sara Traynor).

Now let’s talk about the weather, you know, what this article is supposed to be about. The weather here in Binghamton sucks, especially in the spring.

This semester alone we have seen the weather fluctuate between warm spring days and freezing cold blizzards within the span of a couple of days.

With the poor quality of weather, reactions from the student populace are plentiful, with many students complaining to the administration about a lack of consideration for students’ safety. In a couple of instances this semester, classes weren’t canceled even when the weather was bad enough to justify this. This disregard of safety makes perfect sense when you realize that SUNY students are subjects of a government experiment, as nothing will stop scientists from getting their data. I mean, how could an administration be so incompetent or stupid that they would willingly let classes continue when the roads and campus are in such a condition to endanger not only commuters but also the people who live on campus. Yeah, the school is definitely part of an experiment. No one is that incompetent.

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CULTURAL DEGENERATION AND THE FALL OF AMERICAN CINEMA

Cultural Degeneration And The Fall of American Cinema

By Gunga Din

T

he Anglosphere, in particular the United States, has for years lagged behind their European counterparts in art and culture. Besides several exceptions, including the works of Shakespeare and the artist William Hogarth, England fell behind several centuries of Continental operas, artwork, and paintings, otherwise known as high culture. In the 1920s, however, the United States began to dominate the film industry with Hollywood. Although the U.S. did not successfully enter European Continental high culture, it had a great influence on popular culture. Aimed at the mass-market, American films of “Classical Hollywood” emulated theater and literature. They were entertaining enough for the common man, yet intelligent enough to convey ideas and morality. This reached a high point in 1939, in which a record number of popular films, such as Wuthering Heights and The Wizard of Oz, were released. Like a Shakespearean play, these types of films are timeless enough to have a substantial following today. On the other hand, there are many unsuccessful and poorly made older films, but while the notion of “Classical Hollywood’’ may be a result of survivor bias, the point remains that modern films rarely combine the popularity and respectability of their predecessors.

Although there are many factors contributing to the decline of Hollywood, this article will focus on two main reasons: culture and creativity. Note that in this article, ‘Hollywood’ will include some aspects of the TV industry and English language films in general, as the distinction between the industries has become blurred.

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Many readers will be aware of the trend of Hollywood having a progressive culture disconnected from the general public. During an interview with William F. Buckley, the actor Charlton Heston gave two reasons for why this is the case. First, acting is an insecure profession, and actors are likely to be greatly affected by injury.

As a result, actors are more sentimental and care about the welfare of others. Second, actors need to use their imagination and emotions in their careers. They are more inclined to make judgments based on emotion rather than reason. These two observations can be expanded to the rest of the cast, including writers and directors, leading to a progressive culture in Hollywood. Films produced under this paradigm could be successful, such as the anti-war films produced after the Vietnam War. In recent years however, Hollywood has gone over the top in exhibiting its progressivism. Moviegoers may be familiar with enforced “diversity” in historical productions, social justice, and sexual values. Films matter in that they are highly influential on cultural norms and public knowledge. This is well illustrated by the film Hotel Rwanda, in which the protagonist Paul Rusesabagina is depicted as a selfless hero saving dozens of lives in the Rwandan Genocide. In actuality, he was a corrupt opportunist who was recently incarcerated for participating in the genocide. Hollywood was able to take a little-known man, set him in a tragedy, and dress him as a hero, all the while taking pot-shots at western civilization. In this case, emotion proved stronger than reason, proving Heston’s observations.

The near absence of creativity in contemporary films is a major factor in the decline of the arts. This phenomenon can be explained through the overabundance of remakes, sensationalism and special effects. Art is formed through cultural archetypes and follows artistic precedents to gain inspiration. When art becomes

completely self-referential, its quality begins to deteriorate. Film remakes often use nostalgia to appeal to emotion, expecting a conditioned response based on the success of their predecessors. Plots become predictable, and films turn into self-caricatures. The Star Wars franchise, superhero films, the Jurassic Park films, and remakes of decades-old films such as West Side Story are good examples. Remakes live on the fumes of past successes and are done out of laziness rather than having to face the arduous task of creating quality content. Similarly, sensationalism has become a prerequisite in filmmaking. This trend started with the thrillers of Alfred Hitchcock, which took advantage of the slackening of morality codes in the 1950s. Hitchcock served as a transitional figure in modern film as he worked in the era between 1940-60, and his films had the influence of “Classical Hollywood.”

Subsequent filmmakers expanded on the success of Hitchcock’s thrillers and led to the overuse of scenes that cater to pituitary functions. Explicit gore and sex are commonly used to shock and awe audiences and grab their attention. Sensationalism has consolidated into its final form with the use of CGI, allowing for unprecedented action scenes.

Hollywood has been an integral part of American culture since its onset with the first silent pictures. It has represented American soft power and is still consumed by millions of citizens, though due to an increasingly progressive agenda and stagnant creativity, Hollywood has lost its prestige and popularity. Whether consumers will be conditioned to the new culture, or whether Hollywood will respond to market forces, remains to be seen.

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