North Devon Hospice Bereavement Booklet

North Devon Hospice

Bereavement Information

being there for all the family northdevonhospice.org.uk

Contents Message from the Hospice....................................................................................... 1 Medical Examiners Services...................................................................................... 2 Registration of Death................................................................................................. 3 Devon Registration Offices...................................................................................... 7 Arranging a funeral..................................................................................................... 8 Stopping Junk Mail to the recently deceased........................................................ 9 Other people to inform..........................................................................................10 Other support available...........................................................................................11 Useful contacts..........................................................................................................12 You and the hospice.................................................................................................13 Working with children.............................................................................................14 Ways to remember your loved one.....................................................................15 Notes...........................................................................................................................17

After a death, the complexities of paperwork and managing some practical issues can seem daunting.

This simple step-by-step guide will help you through the process and hopefully reduce some of the anxieties felt at this difficult time.

The Hospice is here to help and support you if you need us.

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Medical Examiner Services Following any death, the hospice doctor will speak to the Medical Examiner (ME) before completing any paperwork.

A Medical Examiner (ME) is a senior NHS doctor who has not been involved in the care of the person who has died. Their job is to review the care that was received and ensure that the paperwork and processes following death are as streamlined as possible.

Within a few days of the death, you will be telephoned by a Medical Examiner (ME) or one of their officers. They will give you the opportunity to ask questions or raise any concerns you may have about the cause of death or about any aspects of your loved ones illness.

Once the review has taken place, one of the ME’s team will call you to tell you what the cause of death will be, as recorded on the Medical Certificate of Cause of Death, (MCCD) and will answer any questions you have.

Following the call, the relevant doctor will complete the MCCD and a cremation form if this is required. The MCCD must be completed before registering a death.

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Registration of Death Who can Register a death?

Ideally, the person registering the death should be the next of kin or nearest close relative.

Alternatively, it could be the person dealing with the funeral arrangements, if you have doubts, please seek advice when making your appointment with the registrar.

Making an appointment with the registrar The person registering the death will need to make an appointment with the registrar to register the death.

One of the hospice team will contact you to let you know when the MCCD has been sent to the registration service, they will also advise that you must wait 24 hours after the MCCD has been sent before making your appointment. To book an appointment, call 0345 155 1002.

Registrars are unable to take ‘walk-in’ appointments, so it is essential to book in advance.

A death would usually expect to be registered within 7 - 10 days unless a deferral has been made to the coroner.

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What you need to take to the registrar appointment You will need the following information about the deceased: • date and place of death.

• full name, including any previous names, and usual address • date and place of birth.

• occupation.

• name, date of birth and occupation of spouse/civil partner, if applicable.

• whether the deceased was in receipt of a pension or allowance from public funds.

You will need to take some form of identification for yourself (such as your passport, driving licence, council tax or utility bill).

If available, you should also take the deceased’s NHS medical card, birth certificate and marriage or civil partnership certificate, but these are not essential so please don’t worry if you do not have them.

Coroners Referrals Referral to the Coroner can be for a number of reasons, for us it is usually if the cause of death is unclear or where death is due to industrial illness. This is usually a formality, but it will mean a delay in registering the death by 2-3 days, as the registrar will need the coroner’s paperwork before registering the death.

We will require your consent to pass on your telephone number to the registrar, who will then contact you regarding the appointment.

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‘Tell Us Once’ Service The Devon registration service operates the ‘Tell Us Once’ service, whereby all government departments will be notified of the death for you.

The organisations contacted include: • HM Revenue & Customs to deal with tax and cancel benefits.

• Passport Office.

• Local authorities to remove from the electoral roll and cancel local benefits, blue badge etc.

• DVLA to cancel the driving license.

• DWP (Department for Work and Pensions).

Take as many of the following documents as possible to your appointment: • Passport • Driving Licence • National Insurance Number • Blue badge • National Bus Pass.

If you do not have all the necessary documents at this time, you may choose to complete the process later; the registrar will explain all of this to you.

The ‘Tell us Once’ Service will contact the DVLA to cancel the deceased’s driving licence, but you will have to contact them directly if you wish to sell or keep any vehicle registered in their name. See www.dvla-contact-number.co.uk/informing-the-dvla-about-abereavement or call their helpline on 0300 790 6801.

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Death Certificates It is advisable to order as many death certificates as you think you might need at the time of registration. You will need to have a copy of the death certificate for each asset holder, e.g. for each bank or building society where there are accounts, each pension or insurance policy. There is a cost for each certificate, but if you require more at a later date the cost may increase and will include postage.

For more information about registering a death, including details of all the Devon Registration offices and up-to-date costs for copies of the death certificates, see www.devon.gov.uk/registrationservice or call the central telephone number 0345 155 1002.

The people manning the central telephone line will be pleased to help you with any queries or concerns you might have.

Registration outside of Devon There are 10 registration offices in the Devon area. These do not include the office of Plymouth City Council who have their own registration services. If you are unable to travel to register the death at one of the 10 Devon offices, you can register it at a more convenient location in London or Wales. You can make an appointment with your chosen office using the same central number.

Your local registrar will send all the information you provide to the registrar in Barnstaple, who will produce the death certificate.

If registering the death outside of Devon, it is advisable to inform the funeral director and the Barnstaple registrar. It will mean a delay in making the funeral arrangements.

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Devon Registration Offices There are four registration offices within the North Devon Hospice catchment area.

North Devon

East Devon

Taw View Barnstaple EX31 1EE

Mid Devon Registration Office Becks Square Phoenix Lane Tiverton EX16 6LB

Torridge

West Devon

Caddsdown Support Centre Farm Road Bideford EX39 3DX

Okehampton Town Council Offices Fore Street Okehampton EX20 1AA

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Arranging a funeral Arranging the funeral You do not have to have a funeral ceremony, religious minister or use a funeral director.

If you wish to use a funeral director, you do not need to wait until the medical certificate of cause of death has been completed before contacting them. However, any provisional arrangements can only be finalised once the Funeral Director has received the certificate for burial or cremation (green form) from the Registrar following registration of the death.

If you are unsure of the wishes of the deceased regarding the funeral, you may find they have included this in their Will. If you held Power of Attorney (POA) for the person who has died, please be aware that this ceases on their death. The executors of the Will – if there are any – would usually take over arrangements.

Funeral directors are valuable sources of information and advice, and most are open seven days a week. The cost of a funeral can vary greatly so you may wish to ask for a brochure and price list to compare costs before making a decision.

If you receive state benefits you can apply for help to fund part of the cost of the funeral. Your funeral director can advise you, or you can go to: gov.uk/funeral-payments. You can also call the Department for Work and Pensions Customer Service line on 0800 731 0469.

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Stopping Junk Mail

to the recently deceased

If someone you know has died, the amount of unwanted marketing post being sent to them can be greatly reduced which helps to stop painful daily reminders.

By registering with the free service www.stopmail.co.uk the names and addresses of the deceased are removed from mailing lists, stopping most advertising mail within as little as six weeks. If you cannot access the internet, you can call 0808 168 9607, where you will be asked for very simple information that will take only a few minutes to complete. Alternatively, ask the bereavement team for a leaflet that can be returned in the post.

This free of charge service provided by the Bereavement Support Network will actively reduce the unwanted marketing mail but also can help reduce the likelihood of identity theft following the death of someone close. The information is not used for any other purpose and you only have to complete this once. Additionally, to stop mail a comparable service can also be accessed from the Bereavement Register or Deceased Preference Service if you would prefer to use them.

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Other people to inform There are various people, companies and authorities that need to be informed of the death. Remember, some may need a copy of the Death Certificate. Others may need a letter of explanation. Here are a few you may need to consider informing: Done Solicitor Bank Building Society Inland Revenue Residential/Nursing Home Landlord/Housing Association/Mortgage Provider Council Tax Office Electricity Gas Telephone Water Company Post Office (redirect mail) DVLA Swansea Careline Social Security Office Motor Insurance Hospital appointments Newsagent Milk delivery Pets (to make necessary arrangements)

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Other support available Bereavement is a very personal event and you may go through a range of emotions and reactions. This can be very upsetting but realising that these feelings are quite normal may help.

Grief may affect you emotionally, physically and mentally or you may be too shocked to feel anything at first.

It is important to ask for help and support. This may be from family and friends initially.

Your doctor can help if you feel the need for medical support to help you through your bereavement. There is help available and you shouldn’t hesitate to contact your family GP. Help is also available from most local church or faith groups.

Pastoral support can be beneficial in helping anyone come to terms with loss, helplessness and grief experienced in bereavement. The Hospital Chaplaincy Service is available for anyone, to support you as appropriate.

Other practical things Check for any library books that might need returning.

Any large items of NHS or Social Services equipment should be returned, please contact Millbrook Healthcare in Exeter, 0330 124 4491 for advice.

Return any medications to your own GP surgery.

Thinking about donating things to a local Charity Shop North Devon Hospice Warehouse, Two Rivers Industrial Estate, Braunton Road, Barnstaple or a local charity of your choice.

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Useful contacts Cruse Bereavement Care Offers free information, advice and support to bereaved people.

0808 808 1677 www.cruse.org.uk

Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB) 03444 111 444 www.citizensadvice.org.uk

Cruse Bereavement Care in Devon 0300 330 5466 devon@cruse.org.uk

Families in Grief (FIG) Help bereaved children, young people and their families.

01271 447960 www.familiesingrief.org

Samaritans Provides a confidential 24 hour telephone helpline.

116 123 Freephone www.samaritans.org

Pete’s Dragons Help people living through the suicide of a loved one.

01395 277780 www.petesdragons.org.uk

Age UK Provides advice, information and support to people in later life.

0800 678 1602 www.ageuk.org.uk Child Bereavement UK Provides specialised support and information to all those affected when a child dies or when a child is bereaved.

0800 0288840 www.childbereavementuk.org (free from landline)

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You and the hospice being there for all the family

Within weeks of a death, every bereaved person known to the hospice is contacted by letter, and after three months by telephone, to offer information about the following support we can provide to people who are grieving.

One to one support

It can be helpful to share your experience, in confidence, with someone outside your circle of family and friends. A member of our bereavement team will be happy to offer you time and a listening ear.

Group support

Sharing the experience of grief and feeling of loss with others during the year, which are facilitated by experienced therapists.

Spiritual support

A member of our bereavement team can help you share and explore the fundamental questions we face about life, death and suffering.

If you have a faith tradition, we will endeavour to put you in touch with someone of your chosen faith.

When someone dies we can feel isolated Here at the hospice we can’t take the grief away but we can walk together

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Working with children When you are close to a child or young person who is grieving, it can be particularly difficult if you are grieving yourself.

Whether you are a child’s relative or friend, we can help you feel more confident in knowing how to respond.

Sometimes children and young people find it easier to talk to someone who is not directly affected by the death. We have qualified counsellors experienced in working with children.

Contact us Anyway

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Ways to remember your loved one

When we lose someone, it can be comforting to know that there are ways in which their family and friends can continue to treasure their memory into the future. Below are four ways which you may choose to keep your loved one’s memory alive.

Your loved one will be held within the hospice’s history as an everlasting memory, bringing continued comfort to family and friends.

The Forever Stone

The Forever Stone rests in our Magnolia Garden as a symbol of our gratitude to those who remember us in their Will. Hidden within the stone itself are the names and a few words from some of those wonderful people, their legacies can be observed with the use of the hospice iPad and will remain part of the stone forever.

The Book of Remembrance

Located in the peaceful and reflective space of The Retreat, our book of remembrance holds the names of our loved ones, beautifully captured in ink by our calligrapher. The book will hold your loved one as a lasting memory for family and friends to observe.

A Way to Remember

This memorial archway was built within the hospice gardens for people to come and remember loved ones who are no longer with us. The name of your loved one can be included on the structure, etched permanently on the glass of the pillars as a lasting tribute. It is a beautiful way to honour the memory of those we miss.

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Living Memories Fund

A Living Memories fund is an everlasting online tribute dedicated to someone special who has died. Creating a Living Memories fund is an ongoing way for your friends, family and colleagues to donate in memory of that special person who is no longer with us. You can also share photos, videos, and updates on any event fundraising you are doing in their memory.

For more information on proceeding with any of the above, please speak to a member of the Bedded Unit or contact us on 01271 344248.

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Notes

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Reference: North Devon Hospice Bereavement Booklet Publication date: November 2024 ......................................................................................................................................................................................

Review date: November 2026 ......................................................................................................................................................................................

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The Hospice would like to thank RNS Publications for publishing this information and the following pages contain some features from services offering their help at this time.

Whilst the Hospice is grateful of their support it does not endorse or recommend any of the services that they provide.

Published by RNS Publications © Tel: 01253 832400 R1