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BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

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| BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE Spring / Summer, 2013


About the cover

| BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE Spring / Summer, 2013

StartYour Happily Ever After With Us

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hether it’s a small celebration or a grand event, the Black Bear Inn Conference Center & Suites’ newly renovated banquet spaces and custom packages are the perfect beginning to your Happily Ever After...

4G Godfrey df Boulevard B l d * Orono, O Maine M i * 207 207.866.7120 866 7120 www.blackbearinnorono.com

Bridal Gown: Kate’s gown is made of taffeta in a simple and elegant style that included a surprise: pockets. The back of the dress differed from the lace up style found in many modern gowns. Instead, it had buttons that had to be hooked with a crochet needle. Veil: Kate’s veil was made by her mother who owns her own quilt shop. “Making a veil was no problem for her,” she said. Jewelry: Decked out with three “borrowed” items, Kate’s pearls were supposed to be her grandmother’s pearls. Those pearls got forgotten at home, but her sister-in-law offered up her own pearl necklace. Kate’s drop crystal earrings were borrowed from a close friend. And she carried a tennis bracelet around her flowers that belonged to her late grandmother. Shoes: One of her favorite items, her shoes, were a champagne gold color with a sparkly bow on the front toe. The heel of the shoe was also the same sparkley gold. Hair and Makeup: Lisa from Island Indulgence Spa in Rumford handled wedding day beauty needs. She and another stylist did all of the bridesmaids’ hair. “They were fantastic to work with,” she said. Groom’s attire: Sam wore a Vera Wang dark gray suit from Men's Wearhouse. Kate’s mom made all the pocket swatches for the groomsmen. The boutonniere was created by Tessa Deering out of Rockport, Mass. Location: Covered bridge in Newry, located near Sunday River.


Back to basics

As a bridal magazine, we want to share our ideas and love stories with as many brides and grooms-to-be as possible. We want to inspire you, and be your guide to a memorable Maine wedding. Our challenge in reaching you? Cost. It costs money to buy a content-rich magazine. But not Marry ME. Not now... In one of our recent staff meetings, an editor queried, "What if Marry ME was free?" What a perfect proposal! BDN Maine distributes news throughout Maine on thousands of newsstands and throughout the world via bangordailynews.com and its mobile apps. You can rely on BDN Maine to be your trusted news and information source, and it's even sweeter when the information is free. Share the good news with your family and friends. Visit marrymemagazine.com for a comprehensive list of locations to get your free copy. You’ll find even more Maine wedding photos, inspiration and web-exclusive content to make your big day special. We’d love to see your ideas, photos, and stories, too. This past August, my husband Bill and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. It’s amazing how quickly the years have flown by.

welcome

And so much has changed. In 2001, there was no Google image search, no Pinterest, no Facebook when we started planning our 2002 wedding. The Knot was in its infancy. Blogs... what were blogs? Twitter? That’s something birds did. Cell phones were large and clunky and certainly not smart. To be honest with you, I’m jealous of today’s engaged couple. With so many tools available to help with planning, it’s no wonder couples are getting more creative. But even back then planning a wedding was stressful. So we have opted to get back to basics with this issue. After all, a wedding is just a big party where you want to look and feel your best while your guests enjoy the shindig. In this issue, we talk about a popular trend: the unplugged wedding. We chat about how to (hopefully) make everyone happy. But most of all, we provide you with ideas on how to make your wedding stand out. A free publication changes everything. We're in love with the idea, and we hope you will be too. Enjoy!

Marry ME Magazine Assignment Editor

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

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PHOTO: Emily McIntosh Photography


in this issue

love stories 26 40 48

Michele & Mark - Brooklin, Maine Kate & Sam - Newry, Maine Lorinda & Robert - Sargentville, Maine

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ADVICE

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Etiquette: Techno-etiquette...................................12 Guy's Corner: Managing the role of moms............20 Ask the Expert: Glow from the inside out..............22 Planning: The modern bridal shower....................38

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YOUR WEDDING Involve everyone....................................................10 Beauty..................................................................14 Information overload............................................32 Unlpugged weddings............................................46

INSPIRATION Nature....................................................................8 Animals................................................................18 Signage................................................................24 Receptions............................................................36 Love Stories (best of)............................................54

INFORMATION Welcome.................................................................5 Photographers........................................................7 Advertiser Directory..............................................64

PLANNER Wedding Day Beauty.............................................60 Venue Comparison................................................61 Photography Checklist..........................................62 Gift Tracker...........................................................63 PHOTO: Christine Bussiere Photography


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Inside

Featured Haley Johnston is an Aroostook County native and has always had a passion for photography. She loves capturing the love between couples and chasing around little ones to preserve their childhood. facebook.com/haleyjohnstonphotos

5. Christine Bussiere Photography

10. Captured Moments Photography

Christine Bussiere Photography will be your personal photographer for your event. Their style is journalistic, capturing the "little things" including detail shots and candids as well as the traditional poses. cbphotography.zenfolio.com

Rebecca Krupke says her photography is a lifetime of memories, captured in moments. Subtle moments often unseen are forever frozen in time using the photojournalistic approach. rebeccakrupke.com

6. Emily McIntosh Photography

11. Samantha Marie Photography

Emily's life revolves around weddings, between owning and operating a photography business and working full-time at The Henry’s Bridal Boutique. She loves being behind the scenes capturing the emotions and traditions of each different story. emilymcintoshphoto.com

Samantha White is a self-taught Aroostook-based photographer who is fun-loving, offbeat, a fiancée, world traveler, and loves photographing people in love. samanthamariephotographymaine.com

7. Jennifer Medeiros Photography Jennifer Medeiros is a wedding and portrait photographer who currently resides in Maine, but hails from Massachusetts and is a Jersey girl at heart. She’s also a Navy wife and mom of two. jmedeirosphotography.com

Born in Maine, but raised all over the world, Tammy specializes in weddings, boudoir, family, children, and seniors. Many people have enjoyed her enthusiasm for photography and always leave with a smile. tammy-michaels.com

8. Joanna Thyer Photography

13. Walla Photography

Joanna has been photographing weddings for more than 10 years and loves every minute of her job. She lives in Bangor with her husband and three children. thyerphotography.com

Lexi and Matt are a husband and wife team. Their goal is to be patient, observant, communicative, creative, and fun! They strive to create enduring images that tell a story. wallaphotography.com

12. Tammy Michaels Photography

love stories

1. Andree Kehn Photography Andree is a non-traditional wedding photographer specializing in outdoor weddings, tented receptions, and couples with a little quirky something-something. Just like you! andreekehn.com

2. René Minnis Photography René first picked up a camera in college and hasn’t stopped capturing the world through a lens since. Driven by creating photographs that bring people happiness, René is known to do whatever it takes to “get that shot.” Quirky and fun, she can be seen drinking coffee, knitting or singing loudly to 80s music when not behind the lens. reneminnisphoto.com

3. Kate Crabtree Photography Kate is a fine art photographer invested in capturing timeless, evocative, and creative images that tell the story of your wedding day. katecrabtreephotography.com

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9. Just the Way You Are Photography

Animal-loving couples rejoice! Debra Bell, a photojournalist/ writer by trade, specializes in outdoor weddings and couples who want to spin a tale. Debra is also a pet photographer and delights in incorporating pets into wedding photos. bellphotostudio.com

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

4. Bell Imaging & Design

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INSPIRATION: NATURE Couples that want to pay homage to nature can do so by weaving natural

| BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE Spring / Summer, 2013

textures and materials into the Big Day.

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PHOTOS PG 9 Clockwise from top Joanna Thyer Photography | Samantha Marie Photography | Walla Photography

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

PHOTOS PG 8 Clockwise from top Just The Way You Are Photography | Samantha Marie Photography Emily McIntosh Photography | Emily McIntosh Photography

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Involve EVERYONE (without forfeiting your vision)

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Story Sheila Grant

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The bride and groom have selected their maid of honor, best man, bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girl and ring bearer. But what about all of the other friends and family who want to feel involved in your special day? Traditional ways to involve loved ones include having them do a reading or sing, said Mackie Faye Hill, owner of Simply Unforgettable Events by Mackie. In cases where the couple does not have a strong religious affiliation, it can be meaningful to have a close friend become certified as a marriage officiant to perform the ceremony. When the bride and groom have children, Hill likes to have the children combine colored sand in receptacles that become keepsakes symbolizing their blended family.


“Who better to trust than friends and family to decorate and make sure your wedding day is everything you ever dreamed of.” - DANIELLE DORRIE,

Membership/Convention Sales Coordinator at Greater Bangor Convention and Visitor's Bureau.

Publisher RICHARD J. WARREN Marry ME Magazine Editor BRIAN F. SWARTZ

for toasts and well wishes during the reception, or creation of a wish box or wish tree, with note cards available at guests’ seats for written sentiments. Photo booths are popular, and newer ones will save photos collectively so that the bride and groom can get copies. Some booths also create video, eliminating the need for a wandering videographer at the reception. Danielle Dorrie, event coordinator at the Lucerne Inn in Dedham, said that putting loved ones in charge of decorating is an ideal way to involve everyone. “Because the bride and groom have so much to worry about, and everyone wants everything to be perfect, who better to trust than friends and family to decorate and make sure your wedding day is everything you ever dreamed of,” she said. Extra ushers to seat guests are also important. A new app for smart phones allows wedding guests to take photographs that are then uploaded to an account for the bride and groom to view later, because “a photographer’s job is to focus on the bride and groom, not on the crowd so much,” said Dorrie.

Marry ME Magazine Assignment Editor DEBRA L. BELL Marry ME Magazine Graphics Editor BRIDGIT CAYER

Advertising Director TOWLE TOMPKINS Advertising Sales LAURIE TRIFOSO

Creative Services BRIDGIT CAYER MICHELE DWYER KRISTIN HURD JOHN KOLADISH HEIDI MARTIN BARBARA MOWER TONYA PICKERING SAM WOOD

Writers & Photographers DEBRA L. BELL, DAVID M. FITZPATRICK, DALE MCGARRIGLE

Contributing Writers SHEILA GRANT EVAN KANARAKIS

Contributing Experts Mackie Hill, Simply Unforgettable Events by Mackie Megan Lord, Pencil Events Paula Paradis, Paradis & Foster Event Management

Contributing Photographers (for more information, see page 7) To advertise in our next edition, please call 207-990-8283, toll-free in Maine at 1-800-432-7964 ext. 8283 or e-mail advertising@marrymemagazine.com We welcome you to participate in MarryME magazine. Send photographs, story ideas, or tips to: 207-990-8118, toll-free 1-800-432-7964, ext. 8118 editor@marrymemagazine.com © 2013 Bangor Daily News. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part is prohibited without express written consent. Requests for permission to copy, reprint, or duplicate any content should be directed to editor@marrymemagazine.com

Cover Photo: KATE CRABTREE PHOTOGRAPHY

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491 Main Street, Bangor, Maine 04401 To subscribe call 207-990-8040 or toll-free in Maine 1-800-432-7964.

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

There are also wine ceremonies and candle ceremonies that can be as elaborate and inclusive as the bride and groom would like. “I love it when people get really creative,” said Hill. She has seen occasions during which each guest brings an item matching the theme chosen by the bride and groom, and adds that item to a collage or container to create a one-of-a-kind memento for the couple. “Or I’ve seen each person bring a blossom which is placed into a large arrangement during the ceremony. I’ve seen outdoor weddings where each person has a ribbon and adds it to a Maypole – not a full-sized one, but one small enough for the bride and groom to keep and take home.” Easier still is including everyone in the wedding preparations and reception festivities. Let loved ones find potential caterers and music, for example. “Mother-in-laws often feel left out because the wedding is about the bride and the mother of the bride,” said Hill. “I’m always careful that the mother of the groom feels included, even if it’s a small task like finding three or four types of invitations to show the couple.” Hill is also a fan of having open mic

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etiquette Paradis & Foster Event Management Paula Paradis is passionate about perfectly executed events. She directs her attention to the smallest of details, always striving to offer events that will be enjoyed and long remembered by guests. Paula is certified by the Etiquette & Protocol School of West Palm Beach. She is also one half of the Paradis & Foster Event Management, LLC team in Bangor. paradisfoster.com

The easy to understand guideline about cell phone usage in places of worship or public venues is the familiar respectful request

Techno

Etiquette

of “Silence is Golden.”

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Story Paula Paradis

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If you have recently been invited to a wedding, it is essential to keep some important guest techno-etiquette in mind for the ceremony and reception. Being courteous and respectful throughout the day will make the event especially memorable for the bride and groom, as well as other loved ones and friends who are in attendance. As technology has advanced to include cell phones, digital cameras, Facebook, and Twitter, a new world of wedding techno-etiquette has evolved. Many couples are now faced with the social dilemma of asking their guests in a sensitive and respectful fashion to put down their favorite devices during the wedding ceremony and/or reception and enjoy an “Unplugged Wedding.” According to pre-techno-wedding etiquette, it has never been proper for guests to take pictures at the wedding ceremony, especially if a photographer has been hired. This etiquette now extends to cell phones, camera phones and digital camera use as not proper during the wedding ceremony. It is important to understand why these rules are in place. Some rules are straightforward and easy to understand,

but others are not. The easy to understand guideline about cell phone usage in places of worship or public venues is the familiar respectful request of “Silence is Golden.” This cell phone courtesy is often posted in the entrances of places of worship or public venues, is listed at the bottom of the wedding program, or announced before the beginning of the ceremony. An “Unplugged Wedding” respectfully requests the guest to turn off not only cell phones but also all types of cameras and other electronic devices. This request is not as common, or as well understood, as the “Silence is Golden” guideline. Please keep in mind that most weddings have professional photographers who capture the wedding moments. Sometimes there may be an exclusivity clause in a professional photographer’s contract stating no other cameras or no cameras with a flash be allowed. A flash from another camera can interfere with the professional shots. All it takes is one guest with a camera to get in the way of the paid, professional shots to ruin them for the bride and groom. Wedding guests take photos because they want to be able to re-live and share

the experience of the day. Camera phones and digital cameras are easy to use and an easy way to send pictures to friends. Be polite and ask permission before taking anyones picture with a cell phone. It invades the privacy of others and is considered rude. If you are posting pictures on Facebook, again, permission from the bridal couple is needed if you intend to tag them. Many wedding couples who prefer an “Unplugged Wedding” will make arrangements to ensure wedding guests can have a small set of photos available digitally to guests within a few days of the wedding, plus some additionally have photo booths at the reception. If you are invited to attend an “Unplugged Wedding,” respect and abide by the wishes of the bridal couple. You may be pleasantly surprised that being “unplugged” can be an enjoyable, in the moment experience, plus the bridal couple will remember you as a gracious guest for a lifetime.


It has never been proper for guests to take pictures at the wedding ceremony, especially if a photographer has been hired.

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PHOTO: Thinkstock / Goodshoot


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PHOTO: Just The Way You Are Photography


Beauty from head

to toe

There’s more to

your wedding-day

vision than just the dress: It’s about the entire look.

Story Debra Bell It’s easier than you might think to look and feel great for the Big Day. Choose the dress that makes you feel great. Smart brides begin planning their wedding “look” as soon as they pair their weddingday theme with an appropriate dress. For example, a beach wedding doesn’t pair well with a full ball gown. Instead, couples should decide on their ideal wedding location and “theme” before brides look at gowns.

The gown The right gown will make the bride feel beautiful while enhancing her own natural beauty. A buxom woman may want to avoid strapless gowns and wear a neckline that will support her bosom by providing all day support.

Too many opinions can overshadow a bride’s own opinion. A bridal salon staffer willl recommend that brides should also avoid bringing a large entourage to witness the dress trials: Too many opinions can overshadow a bride’s own opinion.

A good foundation

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Laying the foundation for your wedding day look should be a fabulous pair of underwear. According to City Drawers owner Dee Bielenberg, located at 105 Main St. in Belfast, the time to start shopping for undergarments is as soon as the dress is found. “A good fitting bra helps anybody look good,” Bielenberg said. “Once you know the dress, start getting busy with the rest of the look. What’s happening underneath should include three pieces: foundation, shapewear, and hosiery.” For foundation pieces, Bielenberg recommends looking at a variety of bras. From bustiers, longline bras, to corsets with matching garters, the most important factor is the fit. The next important factor for the underlook is shapewear. A popular brand of shapewear is Spanks, Bielenberg said. Shapewear helps smooth and “shape” the body to make clothing fit better, but it’s imperative that the underlook is chosen before fittings start so that proper measurements can be taken, she said. Finally, Bielenberg recommended that brides be conscious of choosing

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The best thing to beat the stress is to establish a well-balanced diet and exercise routine. undergarments that will flatter, but not stifle the wedding-day look. Don’t buy undergarments too small while thinking that you will lose lots of weight before the Big Day. You might be left with uncomfortable underpinnings that will distract from and not enhance your Big Day look.

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Beauty regimen

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Once the dress is chosen and undergarments secured, the next piece of “the look” is choosing hairstyle that will compliment the dress, theme, and feel of the wedding. Here are some considerations: • Holding your wedding outside in the August heat? Avoid tight curls and down-dos. Instead, look for an updo that will hold up to the heat. • Heat will affect makeup as well. Consider airbrushed makeup for a flawless, melt-free finish. If you’re the weepy or emotional sort, waterproof mascara is a must. • Choose your crowning accessories before a hairstyle. Veils, tiaras, and combs need to be accounted for in the wedding day do; before setting your sights on a do, decide what accessories you’ll say “I do” in. Then take them into your stylist along with a photo of the dress to brainstorm. • Care for your skin. Skin care is essential to a radiant look. Newly engaged couples (yes, guys, too) should start a skin-care regimen

early to ensure the best-looking glow possible. That means no more soap and water. Instead, cleanse, replenish, and moisturize. Have your last facial 30 days prior to the Big Day. • Nail it. Consider a manicure and pedicure close to the wedding day to reduce the chance of chipping or smudging. Not only is it a treat, but it’ll help polish up your look. For an extra special treat, consider a french manicure or gel nails. • Smile. Insecure about your smile? At-home teeth-whitening kits can help polish those pearly whites. Talk to your dental professional to get recommendations and start the treatment in plenty of time. Teeth whitening not for you? Keep up with good brushing and flossing for a flawless smile.

Nourish your body and mind There’s no doubt that planning a wedding is stressful. From choosing vendors to negotiating family and friend dynamics to keeping on top of to-do lists, it’s enough to leave any person reeling. The best thing to beat the stress is to establish a well-balanced diet and exercise routine. It will reduce stress, and it’ll make you feel great. Set realistic goals and consider some stress-relieving activities like swimming, meditation, or yoga. Even better, get your groom in on the routine. He’s probably stressed too with his to-do lists. By establishing good

routines before the wedding, you will likely continue with them afterwards.

Choose shoes wisely Ladies love their shoes, but sometimes sacrifice comfort for style. Be realistic about the style of shoe you’ll wear. Stilettos outside can be a painful and dangerous combination. Instead, consider stylish wedges or sandals for outside weddings and bring the heels to the reception for dazzling dancing. Still planning on heels and having photos done outside? Check out SoleMakes high heel caps, online at thesolemates.com. Not only do they protect the end of heels that will sink into the ground, but they also preserve the heel and add stability. Likewise, if you’re going to wear the heels at the ceremony and for photos, bring cute shoes to change into at the reception. Trust us, your feet will thank you!

Top it off with some bling The dress, hairstyle, and wedding theme will dictate the best jewelry for the Big Day. Consider making your jewelry something borrowed or even something new. Hidden pins can add interest and honor family members. But be cautious not to add too much bling. After all, a cohesive look will have guests looking at your face, not your bling. Brides today are being reserved when it comes to what they wear. Instead of large amounts of jewelry, they’re opting for smaller pieces and an understated look.


Designed and created for who you are. Fabrics from around the world. A design that will bring out the beauty in you. International style made right here in Maine. Call Maria Antonieta for a personal consultation.

207 871 8200

WEDDING GOWNS ∙ BRIDESMAIDS DRESSES ∙ COCKTAIL DRESSES ∙

MariaAntonietaCouture.com

15 Free Street, Portland

• The spacious “Grandview Room” features banks of windows overlooking the golf course and the rolling hills of the Penobscot River Valley • Hand-hewn, outdoor pergola is a beautiful spot for your ceremony or photos • Full banquet kitchen, experienced staff-- everything customized to your wishes • Our experienced Function Manager takes the weight off of your shoulders, assisting with all the details-- from room setup and menu selection to flowers, music and the wedding cake.

P en ob s c ot Va l l e y C o un t ry C lub

366 Main St. • Orono, ME • (207) 866-2060 • www.penobscotvalleycc.com Photos: clockwise starting from top: Ilke VG Photography | Emily Delamater Photography | Bell Imaging & Design | MemoryMaker Photography | Rene Minnis Photography

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• A full Couples Golf Membership included for the bride and groom with every wedding booked!

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

Perfect.

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INSPIRATION: ANIMALS Does your world revolve around your best furry friend? Here are some ideas about

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how to involve them in your wedding.

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BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

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PHOTO PG 18 Bell Imaging & Design PHOTOS PG 19 Clockwise from top RenĂŠ Minnis Photography | Bell Imaging & Design | Emily McIntosh Photography

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guy’s corner

s Managing the role of mothers in

| BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE Spring / Summer, 2013

wedding planning.

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PHOTO: Thinkstock / iStockphoto


You’ve undoubtedly heard horror stories of overly interventionist mothers and soon-to-be mothers-in-law that threatened to derail a couple’s wedding. Planning nuptials can be stressful and overwhelming regardless of the event size or scale. It’s often the first time either party has ever organized such an event. Story Evan Kanarakis So it's understandable that loved ones might want to lend their assistance in making the entire process run more smoothly and efficiently by sharing the benefit of their own past experiences. Most couples will find they are eternally grateful for the extra advice, support, and sets of hands to make the wedding happen. But what isn’t as welcome is unsolicited advice coming less as suggestion and more as expectation. Here are three tips to managing the role of mothers in wedding planning. Include Your Mother This may sound unexpected but sometimes it really is as simple as just including one’s mother in the actual conversation. Lest we forget that for many moms, this is a day they have been looking forward to since the day you were born, perhaps nearly as much as (gulp) getting to hold their first grandchild. Even if you’re terrified by the notion of letting your mother anywhere near wedding plans, you may be pleasantly surprised to find that all she wants is to be included in the discussion. Unnecessary friction could come from excluding a mother without good cause. Let mom know that her opinion counts and merits a listen. She may have something to say, or not. What counts is that you cared and respected her opinion enough to ask.

However, pause for a second and contemplate all the oft-forgotten elements that can go into a wedding, from managing out-of-town guests to seating plans, bridal registries and returning formal attire after the wedding, especially when you could already be en route to a honeymoon destination. Mother may just know best. Recognize What It Is That You Want It’s inevitable that some mothers are always going to run away with talk of wedding plans from the moment you’re engaged. It’s a natural expression of excitement and to be expected. After all, were you hoping people wouldn’t be happy and looking forward to your Big Day? What you can do, though, is at least contemplate a few key elements in advance of what you both want for your wedding. That way, if your mother starts talking wedding plans and running away with it all, you can gently assure her that plans are already afoot. If you haven’t thought that far ahead, once again gently suggest that you aren’t talking plans yet and just want to enjoy the engagement for a while. It’s a reasonable request. If you remain polite and measured in rebuffing overtures you shouldn’t encounter too much resistance. Each partner should deal with their own mother, rather than the (potentially prickly) other way around.

It generally won’t take that much for a mother to remember that the wedding isn’t about her; it’s about you. Lay the Foundation Should matters sadly become seriously strained, consider a mediator, perhaps another family member or your celebrant. The endgame of a wedding is to spend the rest of your life with a partner. That means their parents are likely to remain a key part of the years ahead, too. Now just might be the time to lay down the foundation on what for you is acceptable and what isn’t, and issues in the planning phases of a wedding from a mother could well signal further troubles down the line. The future peace of family gatherings, holidays and other special occasions is at stake. Nip things in the bud It can save you from a great deal of discomfort later, let alone a wedding that you hadn’t really wanted. Also recognize this is an exercise in forging a stronger partnership with your fiancé as well. Stand up for yourselves as a team. Don’t let a mother’s grievances become a dividing wedge in your own relationship. With enough patience, diplomacy and love, this will be an entirely wonderful period in your lives as you plan the wedding, and sharing in the joy of it with all of those around you — and particularly with your mother — will be one of the most cherished memories gained.

Pause for a second and contemplate all the oft-forgotten elements that can go into a wedding. Mother may just know best.


ask the expert Simply Unforgettable Events by Mackie Mackie Hill, owner and event designer of Events by Mackie brings more than twelve years of experience to the field of creative event design. Based in both Maine and the Baltimore/Washington D.C. area, Events by Mackie specializes in creative wedding design, with a focus on client personalization and flawless event coordination. EventsByMackie.com

Glow | BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE Spring / Summer, 2013

from the inside out

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PHOTO: Bell Imaging & Design

Story Mackie Hill The venue is chosen, you have bought a dress, and most of the vendors have their signed contracts and deposits. If you followed the timeline you now only have to sit back, relax, and wait for the big moment. I must be kidding right? Relax? This is only one of the biggest moments of your life. There are only two moments that they say women “GLOW.” One is when we are expecting and the other is on our wedding day. As a planner I understand the stress of planning and coordinating such an important event. Hiring professionals for all aspects of your wedding will ease you through all the processes that lead you to the final walk down the aisle. However, even with professionals to take all the details off your hands you still ask questions, worry, and continually double check. This leads to plenty of stress that builds and affects the way you function and most definitely the way you look. While we cannot always control our outside environment, we can certainly influence how it affects us and reach the perfect Zen leading to inner and outer beauty. The “glow” radiates from within, so let’s start with the inside. To achieve the inner glow, multiple sessions of relaxation therapy can work wonders. Swedish massage, reiki (a spiritual hands


Do not… I repeat… do not wing it.

in the months leading up to your wedding day. This is just another way to achieve optimum skin, hair, and nail appearance. Of course if you have a full service spa in your area you can combine these visits with massage therapy sessions or reflexology appointments as well. The day before your wedding get a massage, a manicure and a pedicure, and then get plenty of rest.

I highly recommend facials, mani/pedis, and regular haircuts and hair treatments in the months leading up to your wedding day.

PHOTOS: Emily McIntosh Photography, Joanna Thyer Photography, Tammy Michaels Photography

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Last and most importantly is your wedding day. Making choices ahead of time such as whether to hire beauty professionals, what kind of make-up appearance you wish to have, and of course the hairstyle that will top off the whole look are decisions that take time and most importantly practice. Making these decisions early allows you much more time to relax and reduces the worry which of course reduces stress. DO NOT…I REPEAT…DO NOT WING IT. This is your wedding. Hair and makeup trials, at least one of each is a must, but the more the better. Whoever is doing your hair and make-up, whether a professional, yourself, or a friend, a few hours should be spent perfecting

the look before the real thing. If your wedding beauty professional is your regular stylist, great, but not all stylists are created equal. Just because Stylist A gives you a great shampoo and trim does not mean he/she knows how to do a sweeping up do with extensions and pin curls. So give him/her a chance, but do not be afraid to go elsewhere or seek other trials to achieve the look you desire. The same goes for make-up. No one wants to think they are walking down the aisle with the perfect youthful confident look only to later see photos that depict you as a washed out ghost in a wedding dress. Avoid the pitfalls of make-up emergencies with, once again, plenty of practice, and another suggestion…take a photo. Look carefully at your practice make-up applications on paper and see if the camera shows what you hope everyone is going to see. Not to mention what your photographer will capture and print for your future enjoyment. Again I highly recommend hiring professionals to completely destress your wedding preparations. Massage therapists, nail technicians, cosmetologists, and make-up artists perfect their craft and therefore have plenty of practice making people feel and look beautiful. Not only will this keep you worry free, but it is another opportunity for you to just sit back and let someone else do the work. Your only job is to look beautiful. Work hard on that and all will be perfect! You will have achieved... THE GLOW!

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on healing developed by a Japanese Buddhist), or a good rolfing session (body restructuring and movement education) are wonderful stress-reducing practices. If you aren’t big on massages due to sensitive muscles or not wanting to be touched, join a chanting circle, take a yoga lesson, or sweat it out in a sauna. Of course relaxation is personal. If sitting in the park and breathing deeply in the warm sunshine helps you reach zen, take the time to do it. Doing this more than once during your preparation stage can really enhance how you look and how you feel. If you can do any of these things regularly, say once or twice a month leading up to your wedding, and most importantly just before your perfect day, you will be amazed at how great you will feel and how that will translate into how wonderful you look. In addition to these great relaxing recommendations you should also practice eating right, getting plenty of sleep, exercising, and drinking plenty of water. These three vital elements will introduce the necessary vitamins and nutrients into your body, increase your oxygen intake, and reduce the visible appearance of acne, lines, and dark shadows on your face. So now that your spirit, your psyche, and your muscles are relaxed and ready for the stroll down the aisle, the next step is beautifying your outside. I highly recommend facials, mani/pedis, and regular haircuts and hair treatments

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INSPIRATION: SIGNAGE You know the direction of your wedding, but will your guests? Help them feel at home by ensuring they know who’s who

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and where to go.

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PHOTOS PG 24 Clockwise from top Emily McIntosh Photography | Tammy Michaels Photography Joanna Thyer Photography | Jennifer Medeiros Photography PHOTO PG 25 Joanna Thyer Photography


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love stories

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Michele Prentice & Mark Dwyer August 4, 2012 | The Lookout, Brooklin

Handcrafted joy in Brooklin

Story Debra Bell | Photography Andree Kehn

What started as a home renovation project turned into a romance for Michele Prentice and Mark Dwyer. “A bathroom remodel brought us together,” Michele said, grinning. But even before she hired him to redo her bathroom, friends were conspiring to bring them together. A mutual friend introduced them after seeing what Mark had done with his own home. He DJ’ed her birthday party. And then they hit it off after the

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“When I thought about getting married, all I ever thought about was running away to an island somewhere. When I really sat down and thought about it, the last time my family was together was at my grandmother’s funeral. That’s when we decided we needed to hold a wedding.” - Michele Dwyer

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renovation. As active 30-somethings, Michele and Mark enjoyed getting outside. So it made sense that he would pop the question on a cross-country ski excursion in the Bangor City Forest. “We were in the middle of the city forest cross-country skiing, and no one was there,” she said. They started a conversation about children and the future, and then “he got down on one knee while still on skis and asked me. I just sat down, right on the trail. I spent like an hour looking at it. Then I realized we had two miles to ski back.” While Michele had not given him any indication of what she wanted, he had other things in mind. “He chose a ring with the best cut that reflected light, a brilliant cut diamond,” she said. “He did months of research. He knows I didn’t want anything huge.” The couple chose not to rush into planning. Instead they

talked about what they wanted. “When I thought about getting married, all I ever thought about was running away to an island somewhere,” she said. “When I really sat down and thought about it, the last time all my family was together was at my grandmother’s funeral. That’s when we decided we needed to hold a wedding.” Together they decided on a “Maine” experience hosted in August. Michele’s family, she said, is from out-of-state, and many had never been to Maine before. They knew their ideal location needed to include lodging on site for guests, pretty views, and an opportunity to experience Maine at its best. Mark discovered the “perfect” spot while working in Brooklin and it was appropriate that what drew him to the property of the Lookout was the “kissing trees.” The location was discovered while he explored the area. The location held a bed and breakfast, rustic cabins, great


views and everything the couple wanted in a venue. With the venue taken care, of the next big “to do” on the planning docket was to hire a wedding planner. “I felt it was the best money spent to have someone who could help me,” Michele said. She met Megan Lord, owner of Pencil Events in Bowdoinham, through her photographer Andree Kehn. Lord managed the details, helped solidify the couple’s vision, provided guidance and advice, and served as a sounding board. “Without her I think I might have been lost,” Prentice said. Over the course of a year, the couple planned, dreamed, and handled little details with the help of a wedding team, including Lord, who had married on Sept. 4, 2011. Prentice, a graphic designer at the Bangor Daily News, worked hand in hand with Lord to design a theme. Then she designed all of the printed

items, including the invitation package, program, table cards and thank yous, printed items for the reception, and coloring books for the children in attendance. Wedding-day timing was crucial for the wedding. The pair chose to wed beneath two

pine trees leaning together on a small rock island, named by locals the “kissing trees,” accessible only at low tide by a sand bar. So they had to keep an eye to the tides in order to get guests from dry land to the ceremony spot. By the time the wedding day

came, the couple was excited. But did Prentice have jitters on her wedding day? Nope. “The whole day, I wasn’t stressed out,” she said. “People kept checking my hands [to see if she was shaking]. But I wasn’t.”

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“Everyone for months afterward remarked about how we tied everything in together. [For us,] what was really cool was how much friends and family did want to help.” - Michele Dwyer

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As she spent time decompressing with her attendants, guests enjoyed cocktails before the ceremony and ushers used blueand-orange ceramic balls to prepare the path to the trees. Guests, Mark, and the rest of the wedding party headed down to the end of the long sandbar. Then it was time for Michele to head there. “I wanted to tie in family,” she said. “My brother and I are really close, and he’s one of the most important people in my life, so I started [down the aisle] with him. A third of the way down the aisle I met Mark’s dad, and my dad walked me the last part of the way. It was important to me that everyone

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The details

Wedding Design, Coordination and Florals: Pencil Events, Megan Lord Venue: The Lookout Bed and Breakfast, Brooklin Officiant: Tricia Carver-Watson, Community of Christ Hair and Makeup: I Do Spas Bridal Gown: Andrea’s Bridal Bridesmaid Dresses: What a Beautiful Life Groomsmen Suits: Men’s Wearhouse Groomsmen Ties: Solid Color Neckties Catering: The Lookout Bed and Breakfast Disc Jockey: DJ KTF Stationery and Printed items: Michele Prentice Dwyer and Jiffy print Rentals: Granville Party Rental Branding Iron Manufacturer: BrandNew Industries Inc.

have a role.” By the end of the ceremony, the couple was ready to relax and kick back. Guests were met after the ceremony with cocktails of champagne and popsicles infused with blueberries and peaches. Interactive activities helped keep guests busy as photos were being taken, and the reception tent was filled with striking tablescapes featuring peaches, blueberries, and cutting boards wood-burned with Michele and Mark’s wedding logo. The couple also chose to have a nontraditional dessert: peach cobbler, her favorite dessert. “I didn’t want cake; I’m not a cake fan,”

Prentice said. The reception continued sans many of the traditional wedding reception activities, such as the bouquet and garter toss. Kristian, a friend of Mark’s, also served as the DJ and MC in order to make sure the music “didn’t suck.” And, according to Michele, he kept his promise. Michele and Mark’s choice to buck tradition and instead to focus on a handcrafted event was a hit with the guests. “Everyone for months afterward remarked about how we tied everything in together,” she said. [For us,] what was really cool was how much friends and family did want to help.”


The Premiere Location for your Destination Wedding

Elegant Weddings & Receptions Seaside Ceremonies & Rehearsal Dinners

www.nonantumresort.com • 207.967.4050 • 95 Ocean Avenue • Kennebunkport, ME

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Information OVERLOAD?

When it comes to planning a wedding, success is in the details – and for working brides, the key is to be organized. Story Debra Bell So what happens when a bride is on information overload from blogs, wedding planning, sites, books, magazines, and family and friends? Take a deep breath and relax. Then get ready to put a system into place.

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Tip 1. Hire a wedding planner or day-of coordinator

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A flawlessly executed wedding relies on professionals to handle the minutia. As the stars of the show, it’s your responsibility to relax and enjoy, not handle last minute details. You have enough on your plate. The benefits to hiring a wedding planner or day-of coordinator are paramount. The responsibility of such a professional is to handle the details and make sure things run smoothly. You might think you or your family can handle this on your own, but well-meaning family members often are the ones who suffer or get sidetracked. After all, they’re there to celebrate. Wedding planners can also prove to be life-saving for working


couples. Their role is to help zero in on your vision, work with vendors, handle the minutia of wedding planning, and help you have the best day possible. It doesn’t mean you can’t be hands-on. It just means you have someone in your corner.

Tip 2. Put together your team Making the decision to forgo the wedding planner? Then you’ll need to be prepared to do a lot of the heavy lifting. Start by putting together a team that will be supportive and ready to work. This could be your fabulously talented BFFs, a handy aunt, and a cohort of guys. Decide on what you need to do, develop a timeline of when you need to do it, and develop checklists. As the months go by and planning starts to become execution, delegate who will do what, when, and where. Be considerate of your team’s time; most of them will likely be working, too. TIP: Check out our planning worksheets on pages 58-61 for help!

Tip 3. Develop tools that will help keep you organized

Love

documented.

Tip 4. Cull the most important info and develop a plan There is a lot of information out there for couples. Take it all with a grain of sand and pull the most important information for your plan. Keep communicating with each other, your vendors, and your family. The more clued in people are, the better your experience will be. That’s why wedding planners are so beneficial for the stress level.

Tip 5: Take breaks from planning It’s just as important to take breaks and do fun (non wedding-related) things together. After all, once the party’s over, you’re going to be married! Lessen the feelings of wedding withdrawal by staying in tune with each other.

TIP: Check out our planning worksheets on pages 60-63 for help.

Debra Bell, owner

Photography and Design

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890 Coldbrook Road, Hermon (207) 356-2353 debrabell@bellphotostudio.com

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Successfully organized brides start a binder, both online and in hard copy. Online: Resources abound online, including WeddingWire’s online checklists. These checklists allow brides to develop, manage, and delegate wedding to-dos. On her home computer, a digital bride should establish a folder strictly for the wedding. Scan the copies of all contracts and even receipts to stay organized; convert these scans to PDFs. Consider establishing subfolders to help keep track of the vendors. Do the same thing with email so that you can easily find a conversation. Excel or spreadsheets are invaluable to couples. Use the spreadsheet to track guests, gifts, and contact information. You’ll likely use your spreadsheet

four or more times over the course of planning (invitations, bridal shower, RSVPs, and thank yous). Make sure to provide the spreadsheet to your maid of honor, who will need it to plan a bridal shower. For visual brides, consider checking out Pinterest. This site can provide valuable ideas and visuals to help with planning. But beware: Pinterest is addictive and can be time consuming. Hard copy: For hard-copy organization resources, it’s up to your individual style. Three-ring binders with slide-in pockets are perfect for storing copies of contracts and receipts. You’ll also want to establish a notebook solely for wedding planning and note taking. When going into vendor interviews, have a list of your most pressing and important questions with you. Keep your hard-copy resources in a central location away from pets and children. Important documents such as contracts should be scanned and saved digitally for added security.

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“Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life,  love gives us a fairy tale.”

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~Anonymous

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PHOTO: Joanna Thyer Photography


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INSPIRATION: RECEPTIONS Delight your guests with unique

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reception details and tablescapes.

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PHOTOS PG 39 Clockwise from top Bell Imaging & Design | Joanna Thyer Photography | Jennifer Medeiros Photography

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PHOTOS PG 38 Clockwise from top Bell Imaging & Design | Samantha Marie Photography | Samantha Marie Photography

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planning Pencil Events Megan Lord is the owner of the local wedding design and planning company, Pencil Events. In her spare time, she studies for her doctorate in clinical psychology and snuggles her husband, Adam and Schnauzer, Olive. pencilevents.com

A

MODERN for the Modern Family For generations, women have hosted perky get-togethers before “The Big Day.” In decades past, ladies galvanized the neighborhood around

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their dearest betrothed gal pals by bringing treats, sundresses, and witty advice for surviving cohabitation — GASP! These parties were local, tight-knit, and enriched by the shared history of the women in attendance. But today, love, marriage, and family are taking all sorts of forms and the “besties” of betrothed ladies may be confronted with new challenges in planning pre-wedding festivities.

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PHOTO: Christine Bussiere Photography

BRIDAL SHOWER


Planning a shower is a little wacky these days.

Questions abound. What if her family is spread all over the world? How do I plan a shower if I’m totally broke? The bride is an established adult and doesn’t need more stuff; what now? I’m Andy; can I plan a shower for my best friend Mandy? Navigating offroad etiquette issues is tough. How does a BFF design a bridal shower that is loyal to the classic occasion but embraces the modern quirks? Planning a shower is a little wacky these days.

Get Talking Are there ways the pre-wedding shindig can be helpful to the couple’s planning process? Think of the modern bridal shower as a way of preparing not only the bride, but also the guests, for The Big Day. Shower planners don’t need to reinvent the wheel. Take stock of wedding plans; design a shower that supports and enhances the couple’s wedding vision. Host a wedding décor craft day. An afternoon of pre-wedding activities can be a fantastic way to relieve the couple.

Get Your Geek On Leveraging social media is indispensable to the modern bridal shower mastermind. Collect photos of the couple over social networks, create inspiration boards to share your vision, and invite those who cannot travel to the shower to join electronically. Lots of traditional shower games can be adjusted to suit long-distance participants.

Go Local Even though modern guest lists might include as many zip codes as people, travel is also easier than it used to be. Treat all those friends “from away” to food and fun grounded in Maine history, talent, or topography. Go blueberry picking, charter a mini-bus for a scenic drive, or go for a seasonal picnic walk — offer guests a hearty

Maine welcome.

Go Co-Ed What better way to get the couple’s loved ones to love each other than to actually get them in one place? Although bridal showers have historically welcomed women into traditional wifely roles, now they can be adapted to suit any social mix. Some co-ed friendly shower ideas: a pig roast, a beer tasting, a he-said/she-said game show, or a contra dance.

Grab an Instructor Are the bride and groom shameless foodies? Arrange a cooking class! Maine is packed to the gills with talented artists and tradesmen just waiting to share their brilliance. How about a blacksmithing course, a scrapbook binding lesson, a mushrooming walk, or a local artist talk? As every bride will tell you, the engagement goes... by... so... fast. The bridal shower is the perfect event to gather family and friends from both sides and all locations for revelry and friend-making. Instead of fretting over the complexities of today’s world, leverage them! And when in doubt, take your cue from the wedding. PHOTO: Thinkstock / Digital Vision

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Get Crafty

Crafting checks boxes off the wedding to-do list and involves loved ones in the wedding before it even starts. There is no better way to build guest investment in the wedding day than to give them the sense that they have been needed. Shower guests can even create artwork that is showcased (or auctioned off for a honeymoon fund) at the reception!

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Chances are your bride friend, along the zany adventure of wedding planning, is also negotiating social trickiness. Today, we marry later in life, establish lives farther from our hometowns, and visit loved ones less frequently. The time between “Here’s the ring” to “You’ll forever make my heart sing,” is just as magical as it has always been. Now families rely on this time to get to know and love one another. So how can we plan a bridal shower that leaves beloved strangers feeling more like kindred spirits?

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love stories

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love love stories stories

Kate Hallowell & Sam Powell September 22, 2012 | Sunday River

Sweet beginnings in Newry

Their wedding on a sunny fall day in the resort town of Newry completed a decade-long odyssey for Kate Hallowell and Sam Powell.

Story Dale McGarrigle | Photography Kate Crabtree Photography

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The couple first met in 2003 at Erskine Academy in China, where junior Kate and senior Sam were heavily involved in sports. The two started at different colleges, but both ended up at the University of New England in 2008, with Kate in the dental hygiene program and Sam in the physical therapy program. After Kate graduated with her bachelor’s degree in dental hygiene in 2009, she headed west to Colorado, while Sam worked on his doctorate in physical therapy at UNE.

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“I moved to Colorado to ski and be on my own,” Kate said. “Sam and I have been together since I was 17 so it was important to be on my own for a bit. But being in a state across the country from him really opened my eyes to the fact I could survive without him, but I didn’t want to.” Sam felt the same. On the day of his doctoral hooding ceremony in late May 2011, he proposed. Sam invited both sets of parents and Kate’s sister Erin (who would be her maid of honor) for dinner at the Sea Dog in

Portland. He got down on one knee and proposed. “Fortunately, she said yes,” said the understated Sam. Kate recalls things more expansively. “He knows how important family is to me and knew it was special to share such an amazing time with our families present,” she said. “Sam is such a selfless person that he took a day that was about him and his accomplishments and made it about us. He made a little speech when asking me to marry him. The line I remember the most was him saying ‘You have always been my number

one supporter and I can't imagine life without you.’ It was just such a strong sentence that I won't forget. When he got down on one knee, all I could say was ‘ARE YOU SERIOUS?’ Everyone still laughs about how all I could do was repeat that over and over.” The couple took their time before tying the knot. “We didn't see the rush to get married,” Kate said. ”It was very important to the both of us to accomplish our career goals and to establish ourselves individually before becoming a ‘we.’ We needed to be able to be

“It was very important to the both of us to accomplish our career goals and to establish ourselves individually before becoming a ‘we.’ We needed to be able to be self-sufficient. Now to share it together makes it even sweeter.” - Kate Hallowell


self-sufficient. Now to share it together makes it even sweeter.” The two resumed a life together when Sam joined her in Colorado Springs. “We needed to see more of the country,” Kate said. “[We] were able to rock climb in Moah, Utah, and ski all over Colorado.” But they knew they wanted to wed in Maine. “The big thing was having the wedding in Maine, because that’s where most of our families live,” Kate said. “We needed to find a spot where everyone would have a place to stay.” Fortunately, the two skiers had the perfect spot: Sunday River, where they had skied while at UNE. The Jordan Grand Resort Hotel became their base of operations. They agreed on a vintage feel for the wedding and it was reflected in many ways. “The colors of the wedding had that antique feel,” she said. “The flowers made the wedding so beautiful, and the vases were amazing. We also wanted the feel to be low-key but very elegant. One of my best friends, Kaleigh Sloan, helped me. … She had cookies made up as escort cards with the guest’s name and table number. … We also had tags on each napkin with a fork and spoon stamp that was color coded to the meal choice for the wait staff — little touches that made the wedding feel personal.” Kate and Sam made a weekend of the event. On Friday afternoon, the girls enjoyed a spa party at Island Indulgences in Rumford. At the Friday rehearsal dinner put on by Sam’s family, his dad read a poem which he had written, while Sam’s twin brother Ben put together a slide show. The night culminated with an outdoor pool party. On Sunday, there was a brunch for all the guests who spent the night.

They got just the right weather for their wedding day. “It was cloudy in the morning (great for pictures) and sunny in the afternoon,” Kate said. “Just perfect weather.” As with any wedding, there were little glitches. Kate’s family had her grandmother’s pearls restrung, but were forgotten while packing for the weekend. The wedding party expected Kate’s dad to pick up all the men’s tuxedos in Portland, but he didn’t know that and only picked up his own. That left Sam taking the first half of the photos in Ben’s suit. But mostly, the day was full of love and joy. The ceremony, performed at Our Lady of the Snows Church in Bethel, was appropriate for the skiers. “Deacon Dennis Mailhot, gave a beautiful sermon with amazing words,” Kate said. “It was a very personal services where we tried to include all the people in our lives.” The reception, at Sunday River’s Sliders Restaurant, had many touches that echoed the fun-loving couple. “We had a photobooth which was so fun — a lot of great props,” the bride said. “We had a dessert table with pies, whoopies pies and our cake. Sam made our cake topper out of


copper wire and he made a bride and groom skier. We also had a s'mores bar where people could make whatever s'more they wanted (we had just about every candy/topping you could think of). The toothbrushes with our name and date were my favorite, so fun! We had baby pictures of me on the restroom door for the ladies and baby pictures of Sam for the men.”

The details

They had one more vintage touch in reserve — Kate’s dad’s 1960s Spider convertible, which was their getaway car. After the weekend at Sunday River, they headed to Jamaica for their honeymoon. Now the couple is living in Kate’s hometown of Jefferson, but they are looking at a house in Damariscotta. Kate is working as a fulltime dental hygienist in Brunswick, while

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Ceremony venue: Our Lady of the Snows Church, Bethel Reception venue: Sliders Restaurant at Sunday River Bride and bridesmaid gowns: Purchased in Denver, Colorado Groom and groomsmen attire: Men’s Wearhouse BLACK by Vera Wang Two-Button Gray Super 120s Notch Lapel. Wedding bands: Custom designed Flowers: Tessa Deering Catering: Sunday River Cake: Dessert table by Marta’s Bakery in Waterford. Whoopie pies: Moody’s Dinner in Waldoboro. Transportation: Vintage 1968 Spyder convertible.

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Sam is employed as a full-time doctor of physical therapy in Rockland. “Our wedding took my breath away because of the people involved,” Kate summarized. “Sam and I are so blessed to have our amazing family and friends. It was a magical time in our lives. Sam is the most important person in my life and I'm so blessed.”


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GET UNPLUGGED

ways to avoid a wedding paparazzi

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Story Debra Bell

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When Lauren and David Yancey decided to wed on September 3, 2011, their greatest wish was for an event where guests could truly be in the moment. “Honestly, I wanted to be able to walk down the aisle and see the faces of my closest family and friends smiling back at me,” Lauren said “Seeing everyone's expressions as I walked down the aisle is one of my favorite memories of the day. It also made the ceremony feel much more private and personal without pictures and videos being instantly shared online.” To achieve that vision, the couple chose to hold an “unplugged” wedding ceremony. That meant asking guests to put down their cameras, cell phones, and iPads and pick up their faces to watch and hear what was happening.

“It was nice that when I glanced out to see everybody they were looking and watching us instead of their [devices.]” LAUREN YANCEY, BRIDE

Unplugged weddings provide the couple

Sometimes excited and well-meaning guests can cause unintended memories. Haydock recalled an occasion where a couple chose not to do a “first look” (where the couple sees each other for the first time before the ceremony). However, an excited bridesmaid snapped a photo of the bride getting ready on her cell phone, posted it to Facebook, and tagged the bride. The groom was getting ready to change his Facebook status and got his “first look” through Facebook.

Helping the photographer Couples commission the work of a wedding photographer to ensure that moments large and small are captured for posterity. However, well-meaning guests can sometimes cause big problems for pros, which means big problems for the couple. For instance, many churches or synagogues put restrictions on what photographers can do during the ceremony, including movement and the of flash. Wellmeaning guests angling for “the shot” can not only get in the way of a pro’s lens, but cause unwanted distractions for other guests. Other things that can compromise the professional photographs include: • Flashes and preflash beams bouncing off the subjects. • Guests getting out of pews and following the procession or walking behind or in front of the wedding party to get “the shot.” • Formal photographs can be delayed by too many guest cameras. “[Weddings are] personal experiences,” said Portland-based wedding photographer Rachel Bell of Rachel Bell Photography. “The experience for everyone is getting lost. We’re finding guests who don’t know if they are enjoying the ceremony like they should. They should be listening during vows, but instead of really listening to the messages they have their faces stuck in something.”

Here are some ways you can let your guests know that you want to enjoy their presence, technology free. 1. Let guests know ahead of time. In their unplugged guest request, Lauren and David Yancey promised to share their professional photographs with anyone who wanted them in exchange for the absence of cameras, phones, and tablets. Sharing galleries of images is one of the best ways to appease photo-hungry family and friends. Ask your photographer how you can share their work easily. 2. Post a notice. A simple sign saying that you want them to enjoy the ceremony sans technology should be enough. Consider also listing it in your program — and having your officiant make an announcement. 3. Provide activities for guests. Provide things for your guests to do that will enhance their experience and allow them to reminisce about the event they just witnessed. For instance: • Ask guests to write a favorite memory of the bride and groom. • Have a photobooth at the reception and paste the photobooth strip onto pages of paper with space for the guest to write a note. • Encourage guests to interact with ice-breaking games. Not only will they have a blast, but they’ll be so busy that they won’t even be thinking about taking photographs.

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Helping create memories

Preventing unintended memories

IS AN UNPLUGGED WEDDING FOR YOU?

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“We asked that during the ceremony they not take any photographs with phones or cameras and just enjoy the wedding,” Lauren said. “We trusted our photographer, Leah Haydock, to capture the ceremony for us and promised to share photographs with whomever wanted them.” More couples are choosing to ask guests to put down the technology for one day by holding unplugged weddings or unplugged ceremonies. “I'm typically the photographer for my family and friends, never without a camera in my purse,” Lauren said. “It was extremely liberating to forgo this responsibility on our wedding day. I have such vivid memories from the day and stunning photographs to complement them.” The couple turned to Leah Haydock from Casco-based Leah Haydock Photography to capture those stunning photographs. “You get married because you want a public declaration of a very private [event],” Haydock said. “[Couples] ask friends and family to come and witness it, but if they are behind a camera, an iphone, or are tweeting it, then it’s not as personal.”

with flattering pictures to remember. According to New Hampshire-based wedding photographer Andrew Davis, those moments count. Davis and his wife Meg had an unplugged ceremony in 2011. “The day was a whirlwind,” Davis said. “It was nice that when I glanced out to see everybody they were looking and watching us instead of their [devices.] Looking back through the photos, it was so nice to have audience reaction. That really came through in the photos.”

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love stories

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love love stories stories

Lorinda Toscas & Robert Manheimer July 28, 2012 | Sargentville

Savoring the joy in Sargentville

Story David M. Fitzpatrick | Photography René Minnis Photography

A wedding day can be storybook perfect – like it was for Lorinda Toscas and Robert Manheimer.

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

How perfect can a wedding be? When it follows a magical first meeting, a courtship of deep romance, and three months of fast planning, it can be storybook perfect, like it was for Lorinda Toscas and Robert Manheimer. After living in New York for 17 years, and working for several years there as an acupuncturist and herbalist, California native Lorinda took a Manhattan hiatus by moving to the British Virgin Islands. She met Bob there in May 2010, while at dinner with her friend Kay. Bob soon tried to finagle his way into an acupuncture appointment with her. “I had a sense that it wasn’t just for acupuncture,” she said. “I was a

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little resistant, but when we met, it was definitely a magical moment. He said it was like he was struck by a lightning bolt. It was hard to deny those feelings.” After returning to New York, Bob began visiting her. They quickly became a couple, and soon Bob brought Lorinda to Sargentville, Maine, where he’d made his home several years before. He’d attended college in Maine and, as a sailor, loved the coast. Lorinda had been considering moving somewhere smaller, such as Boston or Portland, but the Blue Hill Peninsula was like another world. She loved it immediately. They’d both been married before, and Lorinda wasn’t interested in repeating. “I never expected to be married again,” she said. “I was very forthcoming about that when I first met him.” Luckily, Bob didn’t listen very well. In

April 2012, while vacationing at St. Martin in the Caribbean, during a dinner with their close friends Lisa and John, Bob proposed. Lorinda’s marriage stance went out the window with her eager acceptance, and she even wanted to be married three months later in Maine. “I picked the best part of the summer in Maine,” Lorinda said. “Otherwise, we’d have waited until the following summer— and that seemed silly.” She threw herself into planning to pull it off. Their friend Andrew worked up until the day before the wedding to finish their new boat barn in Sedgwick, and friends and family from near and far pitched in to help decorate it as a wedding-reception barn until the morning of the wedding. They strung lights and hung bunting, tied flatware and set tables. They planted, strung, and arranged flowers. They ran

“I just felt ensconced by everyone’s happiness and love. It was so intimate and personalized. The warmth was incredible.” -Lorinda Toscas


errands, picked up oysters, and built a fire pit. They capped the evening off with a prewedding lobster bake for the out-of-state guests. Lorinda and Bob’s chapel was their float dock in Sargentville, plus two boats to help hold the 90 guests. Their black Lab, Jett, escorted the couple down the aisle. During the ceremony, the mackerel started running, roiling the water around the dock. Jett and his brother Casco fished for them as porpoises surfaced around them. Valerie, partner of the officiant Amy, played guitar; Lisa, Lorinda’s childhood friend, and Richard, Bob’s longtime friend, read poems for them; and Lorinda read a poem she’d written for Bob. The night ended with fireworks. “I just felt ensconced by everyone’s happiness and love,” Lorinda said. “It was so intimate and personalized. The warmth was incredible. That’s why it was beyond both of our expectations.” About the only thing unplanned was Bob’s jacket. Lorinda had expected him to wear his blue jacket, but a friend talked him into wearing gray. It wasn’t the match she’d envisioned for her dress, but their

wedding negotiations had specified that his outfit was up to him, just as she was allowed to hire a second band for dancing at the reception. It was a compromise that exemplified their union. “That’s representative of our relationship, and I guess that’s why it worked,” Lorinda said.

When everything came together that day, it was even better than Lorinda had anticipated. With friends and family, boats and docks, dogs and porpoises, music and poetry—the sum greatly transcended all the parts. “I just wanted it to be happy and uplifting,” Lorinda said. “I wanted bright


“When we met, it was definitely a magical moment… It was hard to deny those feelings.” -Lorinda Toscas

The details

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summer colors. I wanted the joy to be palpable.” Lorinda says their very special day was possible because of everyone’s help. New brides should take that cue and not try to do it all, and expect absolute perfection, alone. You might not meet every one of those details, Lorinda says, but the day will be amazing anyway. And that’s when you forget those details and enjoy your wedding. “The day goes by so quickly,” she said. “Really savor it.”

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Ceremony venue: The couple's float dock at home in Sargentville Wedding Officiant: Amy Hausman, N.Y. Reception venue: The couple's boat barn, Sedgwick Bride’s gown: Net-a-porter.com Groom’s attire: Linen Jacket Home Store, Northeast Harbor Hair and Makeup: Bella Skin and Body Wedding bands: Pyramid Studios, Ellsworth Flowers: dansflowers.com and Surry Gardens, Surry Cake and Catering: Lily’s Cafe and Kyra Alex, Deer Isle Rentals: Wallace Tent, Ellsworth Invitations/paper goods: Fine Day Press, Brooklyn, N.Y. Favors: homemade Oysters: Little Island Oysters, Brooksville Wine and champagne: Blue Hill Wine Shop Bar: Mainely Bartending Ceremony music: Valerie Romanoff, Starlight Orchestras Reception music: Los Dos Canosos, Belgrade Lakes and Deathrow Tull, Brooklyn, N.Y. Music equipment rental: Mark’s Music, Brewer.


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INSPIRATION love stories When the staff of Marry ME are looking at potential love stories, it’s important that there be inspirational features

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MICHELE & MARK | AUG. 4, 2012 ANDREE KEHN PHOTOGRAPHY

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This wedding got our creative juices flowing and made our assignment editor want to get married all over again. One look at the photos (see pages 26-30) and you’ll see why. Here are four inspiring things from Michele and Mark’s wedding. 1. Wedding madlibs. Engage your guests while you have photos taken. The result? A fun wedding keepsake. 2. Guest interaction. There’s nothing better than asking friends and family to create a keepsake. Michele and Mark asked guests to help create art for their home. 3. Bridesmaid thank yous. Your bridesmaids (and groomsmen) do so much for your wedding, so thanking them is a given. Beautifully packaged, this truly added a special touch. 4. Use of natural environment. Restricted only by the tides, the wedding spot required some creative thinking. Check out the dual “M’s” on the rocks below the kissing trees. Who says your ceremony space has to be decorated, especially in Maine?

to the wedding. Here are some of the things that inspired us about our three featured love stories.


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INSPIRATION love stories

SAM & KATE | SEPT. 22, 2012 KATE CRABTREE PHOTOGRAPHY Sam and Kate are our cover couple, and their wedding was inspired by little touches and classical thinking. Set at Sunday River, there was no doubt that there would be some snowrelated decor. Here are four inspiring things from their Big Day. 1. Going for comfort. Check out the flower girl’s pink converse sneakers and you’ll instantly recognize that comfort was king for this wedding. 2. Party games. Party games are seeing a resurgence at weddings and this elegant and fun “his and her” beanbag games are perfect for keeping guests occupied before and during the reception. 3. Unique table names. Another way to add uniqueness to your reception is to use table names. Kate and Sam are huge skiiers and chose to name their tables after trails at Sunday River. 4. Smile. Weddings are chock full of full-fledged grins, so a practical and unique favor was toothbrushes. With a nod to Kate’s line of work (dental hygenist) and the couple’s love of the Red Sox, these favors inspired us.


INSPIRATION love stories

LORINDA & BOB | JULY 28, 2012 RENÉ MINNIS PHOTOGRAPHY This wedding was an awesome reminder that it’s never too late to find love. And with at-home touches, beautiful details, and some whimsy, this wedding reached out and shook us. Here are four of our favorite inspirational features. 1. Using your furry loved ones in the wedding. More couples are choosing to include their furry family members when possible. Give Fido a valet and ensure it’ll be comforting for him, not crazy, and there’s no reason not to include him. 2. Lobster love. We were certain these photos were fun anyway, but to later find out that the couple had picked up too many lobsters and decided to pardon one was icing on the crate. We love how they released the lobster back to the ocean with their pup watching. 3. Farm to table. Many couples are choosing to buy local when it comes to Big Day noshing. Lorinda and Bob nicely showed guests the menu, but also where the food came from. 4. Open home. The couple opened their home to family and friends as they celebrated. Complete with a campfire for warmth (and roasting some goodies), the at-home feel inspired us to think outside the typical venue.


planner

Wedding day beauty

Your wedding day beauty regimen should begin well before the wedding itself. Use this planner sheet to keep track of your pre-wedding beauty needs and the day of appointments.

Makeup Makeup Artist Name:__________________________________________________________________________________________ Phone or email:_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Appointments scheduled:______________________________________________________________________________________

Massage Therapist Name:_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Phone or email:_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Appointments scheduled:______________________________________________________________________________________

Nails Salon:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Nail technician name:__________________________________________________________________________________________ Phone or email:_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Appointment scheduled:_______________________________________________________________________________________

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Style and color of nail polish:___________________________________________________________________________________

Hair

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Additional information:_________________________________________________________________________________________

Salon:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Hair stylist name:______________________________________________________________________________________________ Phone or email:_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Trial hairstyle appointment (no less than 2 months ahead):_______________________________________________________ Day-of appointment:___________________________________________________________________________________________

Skin care Skin care specialist name:______________________________________________________________________________________ Phone or email:_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Date of skin care appointment:_________________________________________________________________________________


planner

Venue comparison

Choosing a venue is as important to the success of your wedding as the dress, the food, and the little details. Use this sheet to inventory potential venues for your ceremony, reception or both. Make copies of this sheet, if necessary.

Cost_______________________________________________________

Cost______________________________________________________

Contact person_____________________________________________

Contact person____________________________________________

Address____________________________________________________

Address___________________________________________________

Telephone__________________________________________________

Telephone_________________________________________________

Email______________________________________________________

Email_____________________________________________________

Website____________________________________________________

Website___________________________________________________

Does the venue offer:

Does the venue offer:

__ Catering

__ Catering

__ Guest rooms

__ Guest rooms

__ Space for the ceremony

__ Space for the ceremony

__ Space for the reception

__ Space for the reception

__ Bar service

__ Bar service

What other things does the venue offer?______________________

What other things does the venue offer?_____________________

___________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________

Venue_____________________________________________________

Venue____________________________________________________

Cost_______________________________________________________

Cost______________________________________________________

Contact person_____________________________________________

Contact person____________________________________________

Address____________________________________________________

Address___________________________________________________

Telephone__________________________________________________

Telephone_________________________________________________

Email______________________________________________________

Email_____________________________________________________

Website____________________________________________________

Website___________________________________________________

Does the venue offer:

Does the venue offer:

__ Catering

__ Catering

__ Guest rooms

__ Guest rooms

__ Space for the ceremony

__ Space for the ceremony

__ Space for the reception

__ Space for the reception

__ Bar service

__ Bar service

What other things does the venue offer?______________________

What other things does the venue offer?_____________________

___________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________

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Venue____________________________________________________

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Venue_____________________________________________________

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planner

| BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE Spring / Summer, 2013

Photography checklist

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While couples put lots of thought into venue, attire, and other details, it’s important to plan ahead for photos. The best way to do this is to work directly with your photographer. Use this sheet to write out the important people who should be included in any formal photographs. Provide a copy to your photographer and also provide them with a point person who is willing to take charge and wrangle family members.

Bride’s Name:______________________________________________

Groom’s Name:_____________________________________________

Maid/Matron(s) of Honor:___________________________________

Best man/men:_____________________________________________

Bridesmaid(s):_____________________________________________

Groomsmen:_______________________________________________

Junior Bridesmaid(s):_______________________________________

Junior Groomsmen:_________________________________________

Flower Girl(s):______________________________________________

Ring Bearer(s):_____________________________________________

Siblings:___________________________________________________

Ushers:____________________________________________________

Groom’s Grandparent(s):____________________________________

Mother of the Groom:_______________________________________

Aunts and Uncles:__________________________________________

Father of the Groom:________________________________________

Other:______________________________________________________

Other: _____________________________________________________

Mother of the Bride:________________________________________

Siblings:___________________________________________________

Father of the Bride:_________________________________________

Groom's Grandparent(s):____________________________________

Siblings:___________________________________________________

Aunts and Uncles:__________________________________________

Bride’s Grandparent(s):_____________________________________

Other:______________________________________________________

Aunts and Uncles:__________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

Other: _____________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

Special notes about needs and relationships:_____________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Tip: Allow between 5-8 minutes per formal photograph.

Tip: Make sure all family members know where to

Formals may take longer based on the number of people and

go and when for family portraits. A lost family member can take

their availability.

away time from the image creation.


planner

Gift tracker

What’s nicer than receiving a gift from a loving family member or friend? Thanking them for their thoughtfulness. Use this sheet to help track your gifts. Make extra copies for events such as showers. As you’re opening gifts, make sure to write down who gave it and what it was. Then don’t forget to send a simple thank you note within one month of the shower or Big Day.

GIFT:_______________________________________________

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

GIFT:_______________________________________________

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

GIFT:_______________________________________________

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

GIFT:_______________________________________________

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

GIFT:_______________________________________________

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

GIFT:_______________________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Received from:_____________________________________

Thank you sent

Thank you sent

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GIFT:_______________________________________________

BDN MAINE MARRY ME MAGAZINE, Spring / Summer 2013

GIFT:_______________________________________________

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advertiser directory

ACCOMMODATIONS

Florist

Atlantic Oceanside 119 Eden Street, Bar Harbor 207-288-5801 barharbormainehotel.com

Lougee & Fredericks 364 State Street, Bangor 800-879-5996 lougeefrederick.net

Bar Harbor Inn and Spa Newport Drive, Bar Harbor 207-288-3351 barharborinn.com

Honeymoon

Black Bear Inn 4 Godfrey Drive, Orono 207-866-7120 blackbearinnorono.com Nonantum Resort 95 Ocean Avenue, Kennebunkport 207-967-4050 nonantumresort.com

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Portland Regency Spa 20 Milk Street, Portland 207-774-4200 theregency.com

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Atlantic Oceanside 119 Eden Street, Bar Harbor 207-288-5801 barharbormainehotel.com Bar Harbor Inn and Spa Newport Drive, Bar Harbor 207-288-3351 barharborinn.com Black Bear Inn 4 Godfrey Drive, Orono 207-866-7120 blackbearinnorono.com

ATTIRE

Nonantum Resort 95 Ocean Avenue, Kennebunkport 207-967-4050 nonantumresort.com

Maria Antonieta Couture 15 Free Street, Portland 207-871-8200 mariaantonietacouture.com

Portland Regency Spa 20 Milk Street, Portland 207-774-4200 theregency.com

Willey's Formal 248 State Street, Suite 19, Ellsworth 207-664-2525 mainegunshops.com/formal-wear-default.asp

Invitations

BEAUTY SALON/SPA

Bell Imaging & Design 890 Coldbrook Road, Hermon 207-356-2353 bellphotostudio.com

Anthony John's Day Spa 1010 Stillwater Avenue, Bangor 207-907-4263 anthonyjohnsdayspa.com

Creative Print Services 5 Dowd Road, Bangor 207-947-2200 creative-ps.com

Bar Harbor Inn and Spa Newport Drive, Bar Harbor 207-288-3351 barharborinn.com

Photographers

Portland Regency Spa 20 Milk Street, Portland 207-774-4200 theregency.com

Bell Imaging & Design 890 Coldbrook Road, Hermon 207-356-2353 bellphotostudio.com Shane's Wedding Photography P.O. Box 813, York 207-337-1894 shanesweddingphotography.com

Reception/Rehearsal Dinner Bridal Shower Atlantic Oceanside 119 Eden Street, Bar Harbor 207-288-5801 barharbormainehotel.com Bar Harbor Inn and Spa Newport Drive, Bar Harbor 207-288-3351 barharborinn.com Black Bear Inn 4 Godfrey Drive, Orono 207-866-7120 blackbearinnorono.com Coastal Maine Botanical Gardens PO Box 234, Boothbay 207-633-4333 mainegardens.org Nonantum Resort 95 Ocean Avenue, Kennebunkport 207-967-4050 nonantumresort.com Peakes Hill Lodge 40 Peaks Hill Road, Dedham 207-944-8319 peakeshilllodge.com Penobscot Valley Country Club 366 Main Street, Orono 207-866-2423 harrisgolfonline.com Portland Regency Spa 20 Milk Street, Portland 207-774-4200 theregency.com Schooners 5 South Main Street, Brewer 207-989-5389 schoonersbrewer.com Spectacular Event Center 395 Griffin Road, Bangor 207-941-8700 spectaculareventcenter.com

Rentals Maine Equipment & Party Rental 1179 Hammond Street, Bangor 207-989-9700 maineequipmentrental.com


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PHOTO: Walla Photography


“A kiss can beautify souls, hearts, and thoughts.”

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~Author Unknown

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PHOTO: Captured Moments Photography


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Memorable... Two outstanding waterfront locations for ceremonies, receptions, rehearsal dinners and showers provide a stunning setting for your special day. Oceanview suites with balconies and incomparable personal service are elegant, spacious and fit for a bride. Professional menu planning and complete bridal services take care of every detail competently, beautifully.

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Photo by Michele Stapleton


BDN Maine Marry ME Magazine, Spring/Summer 2013