Jan18 Proof

Do It Yourself

$5.95

January 2018

CONTENTS

JANUARY 2018

FEATURES 42 IN CONVERSATION: AMY MORIN Tips for mentally strong parenting 46 GOING TO THE CHAPEL DIY your wedding for a memorable day 56 GET OUT: QUEBEC CITY Tips and tricks for traveling to Quebec City this winter 46

GOING TO THE CHAPEL

56

GET OUT: QUEBEC CITY

IN EVERY ISSUE 08 WHAT’S HAPPENING Local news & sightings 16 OBSESSIONS What we can’t get enough of this month

ON THE COVER DIY everything from arts and crafts to travel and weddings.

2 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

PHOTOS: (TOP) KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY; (BOTTOM) JULIA BAYLY

64 THE VIEW FROM HERE When your childhood starts repeating itself in your own children

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

PHOTOS: (CLOCKWISE FROM TOP LEFT) BDN FILE; SARAH WALKER CARON; AISLINN SARNACKI; BOB DUCHESNE; THINKSTOCK; KATIE SMITH

14 MAINE’S FOLK LEGEND Noel Paul Stookey talks about music, politics and what’s to come in the new year

FOOD & DRINK

HEALTH & FITNESS

20 IN SEASON NOW Parsnips are coming into their own this season

24 SCENIC SNOWSHOE TREKS Beautiful trails for winter walks

22 DAILY SPECIAL Where to find local restaurant deals every night of the week

30 GET ACTIVE! Real moms share their favorite workouts for parents short on time

HOW TO

HOME & FAMILY

OUTSIDE

34 LET IT SNOW DIY snow globes for kids

38 GETTING COZY How hygge can help you fall in love with Maine winters

62 MAPPING THE PLANETS Follow the orbit from Houlton to Presque Isle

36 ABSTRACT WAVE PAINTING Quick and fun abstract art that anyone can create www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 3

EDITOR’S NOTE

As I am writing this, it’s early morning on the first day of December. The sky has just begin to lighten to grey — it’s pretty cloudy today — with the sun’s rise.

The day is spread out before me, an unwritten page in the book of my life.

That’s a lot like how the new year feels. As we count down the last seconds of one year, it’s like we’re releasing the trials, challenges and hardships of that year. Then the new year arrives, filled with so much hope and possibility.

The year 2017 is one I am very much looking forward to letting go. It was a tough one, personally and professionally.

SO, WELCOME 2018.

ARE YOU READY TO CREATE A GREAT LIFE THIS YEAR? In this issue, we’re talking about all the ways we can bring a personal element to our lives through do-ityourself projects. From creating artwork for the walls (see the fabulous wave painting tutorial on page 38) to planning a DIY wedding (page 48), there’s so much you can do to bring your personality into elements of your life.

But that’s not all. Writer Crystal Sands explains the concept of hygge, a Danish word that describes a coziness found in a simple life. Think fluffy blankets, steaming cups of hot cocoa, cuddles and more. Read about it on page 40.

We’ve also go a new columnist, Emily Morrison, who you can read on page 64, as well as a new for 2018 feature on travel. Julia Bayly takes us to Quebec City in her first travel piece found on page 56.

HERE’S TO A BETTER, INSPIRED NEW YEAR!

SARAH WALKER CARON, EDITOR

Connect With Us Online bangormetro.com facebook.com/BangorMetro @BangorMetro bangormetro talkback@bangormetro.com 4 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

www.bangormetro.com P.O. Box 1329 Bangor, Maine 04402-1329 Phone: 207.990.8000

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6 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

New Year's SPECIAL

Bangor Metro Magazine. January 2018, Vol. 14, No. 1.

Copyright © Bangor Publishing Company.

Bangor Metro is published 10 times annually by Bangor Publishing Company. All rights reserved.

Bring in the New Year

This magazine may not be reproduced in whole or part in any form without the written permission of the Publisher.

Bangor Metro is mailed at standard rates from Portland, Maine.

Opinions expressed in either the editorial or advertisements do not represent the opinions of the staff or publisher of Bangor Metro magazine. Advertisers and event sponsors or their agents are responsible for copyrights and accuracy of all material they submit.

Bangor Metro magazine to the best of its ability ensures the acuracy of information printed in the publication.

Inquiries and suggestions are welcome and encouraged. Letters to the editor, story suggestions, and other reader input will be subject to Bangor Metro’s unrestricted right to edit and publish in the magazine both in print and online.

Editorial: Queries should be sent to Sarah Walker Caron at scaron@bangordailynews.com.

Advertising: For advertising questions, please call the Sales Director Todd McLeod at 207-990-8105.

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COVER: Amy Allen

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WHAT’S HAPPENING

JAN. 6 Tango Workshop in Eddington

JANUARY JAN. 2 DIRTY DANCING: THE CLASSIC STORY ON STAGE Johnny! Fans of the classic 1980s romantic drama won’t want to miss this stage show at the Cross Insurance Center in Bangor.

This is the story of Baby Houseman and Johnny Castle, two people brought together by the desire to help someone — who then discover something special between them.

It’s passionate, fun and exciting. And the stage version of this story includes all that music fans love from “Hungry Eyes” to “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life.” Tickets available at the Cross Insurance Center box office and via Ticketmaster.

JAN. 6 TANGO WORKSHOP Inspired by Dirty Dancing? You’re in luck.

Back Door Dance Studio will present a fourhour ballroom tango workshop at the Eddington studio, 34 Lois Lane at 1 p.m. It’s $70 per couple, and limited to 10 couples.

8 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Email swingtime34@gmail.com to register (and yes, registration is required).

JAN. 13-14 SNOWCON X

JAN. 13 WINTER BEER FEST 2018

On the cold, often snowy days of January, a bright spot appears for the weekend at the Cross Insurance Center. It’s the annual SnowCon tabletop gaming convention where game lovers come to from near and far. And if you love playing games, this is where you want to be too. Join scheduled games, sit in on pick-up games, share your favorites and try out new ones. And you can even play in an official Catan US Nationals Qualifier Tourney. The Tournament Winner will win a trip to the 2018 Catan US Nationals Tournament. Visit www.snowconmaine.com for more details.

Come toast to winter at the third annual Bar Harbor Winter Beer Fest. Celebrate from 1-5 p.m. at our new festival location, downtown at Atlantic Brewing Midtown, a small-batch brewery.

The event will include games, a photo booth and live music from local bands.

The new space is where Atlantic Brewing Company is developing small batch beers just seven barrels at a time. It’s a pilot facility that allows fellow brewers from around the state, country, and world to collaborate on unique recipes and formulations in a shared environment.

Tickets are only available by purchasing in advance. The $25 festival ticket includes unlimited samples and a tasting glass to bring home. Designateddriver tickets are $10. Children under 10 years old are free admission. Tickets are on sale now at www.barharborinfo.com.

JAN. 18 YAMATO DRUMMERS Thunderous rounds, explosive beats, heartthumping rhythm. These are some descriptors that hint at the exciting experience that Yamato Drummers provide. This will be a high-energy performance by drummers using traditional Taiko drums, which are used

PHOTOS: (TOP) YACOBCHUK/ THINKSTOCK; (RIGHT) BDN FILE

EVENTS

JAN. 13-14 SnowCon X at Cross Insurance Center

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 9

EVENTS

WHAT’S HAPPENING

JAN. 25 Joey Alexander at the Collins Center

in Shinto rituals. And they’ll use their whole bodies to produce the music — it sounds like a pretty amazing experience. Tickets are available via the Collins Center box office.

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JAN. 23 DANCING WITH THE STARS: LIVE! — LIGHT UP THE NIGHT A little samba, a little cha-cha, a little jive … Dancing With The Stars: Live! returns to Bangor in January with a showcase of professional dancers performing group dances, duets and more. Both ballroom and contemporary dances will be performed.

Tickets available at the Cross Insurance Center box office and via Ticketmaster.

JAN. 25 JOEY ALEXANDER He started playing jazz at age 6, has been featured on 60 Minutes and won the Grand Prix at the 2013 Master-Jam Fest. Now, he’s 16 and this jazz piano sensation will be playing at the Collins Center in January.

Tickets are available via the Collins Center box office.

PHOTO: ROMOLOTAVANI/THINKSTOCK

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STILL STUMPED?

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Here are the answers to last month’s Pop Quiz.

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Play THIS MONTH’S Pop Quiz on page 13! www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 11

EVENTS

SIGHTINGS

HERE’S A LOOK AT JUST A FEW SPECIAL EVENTS FROM THE PAST MONTH...

2 1 1: Hundreds of people watched as Santa Claus came to town and the Christmas tree in Post Office Square was lit on the first weekend of December in downtown Belfast.

2: Michelle Sprague, left, accepts a check from Nancy Ketch, Houlton’s economic development director, to aid in Sprague’s new fitness center, Raising the Bar. Sprague was

one of three individuals to receive awards through the 2017 Entrepreneur Challenge.

3: Local artist and muralist David Hurley’s latest work, “Runaway Peas,” featuring a 24-foot-long pea pod and three escaping peas, was installed at the end of November on the side of the United Farmers Market of Maine building in downtown Belfast.

SHARE YOUR EVENT PHOTOS! 12 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Email your photos and captions to

talkback@bangormetro.com

PHOTOS: (1) ABIGAIL CURTIS; (2) JOSEPH CYR; (3) ABIGAIL CURTIS

3

4

It’s Summer in Maine!

Family-friendly fun is the name of the game! Play online at bangormetro.com for your chance to win a FREE one-year subscription to Bangor Metro!

5

4: With the assistance of a dozen children, Santa Claus counted down from 10 to light the Christmas tree in downtown on Guilford last month. The arrival of Santa and Mrs. Claus helped kick off Hometown Holidays events across the region over the weekend.

the ribbon for ProKnee’s new manufacturing facility and warehouse in Whitefield.

6: The Polar Express was all lit up and on display during the Rotary Club of Bangor’s 2017 Festival of Lights Parade in downtown Bangor.

5: Lee and Jennifer Richards prepare to cut

PHOTOS: (4) STUART HEDSTROM; (5) ALEXANDER VIOLO; (6) SARAH WALKER CARON

6

FIND ANSWERS TO LAST MONTH’S POP QUIZ ON PAGE 11!

Visit our Bangor Metro Facebook page to play online! www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 13

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Q&A

NOEL PAUL STOOKEY has made his home in eastern Maine for decades, so while he’s best known across the country as the Paul from iconic folk trio Peter, Paul and Mary, to Mainers, he’s just Noel. Late last year he released “summerfallwinterspring,” a four-song EP of new songs — two explicitly political (“I Will Stand” and “Impeachable”) and two personal and sweetnatured (“Somethin’ Special” and a cover of the timeless ballad “Moon River”).

Stookey recently spoke to Bangor Metro about the personal, the political, and using his fame as a musician to help people in the state where he’s lived for the past 30 years.

YOU HAVE A LONG HISTORY OF RESPONDING MUSICALLY TO THE POLITICAL CLIMATE. COMPARED TO OTHER CHARGED ERAS IN AMERICAN HISTORY, HOW DOES THIS ONE FEEL? It’s almost too big to wrap my arms around. I do sort of feel more helpless, because the issues are so much more numerous. In 1963, it was pretty easy to focus on one thing — the inequity in our society. But then the realization went beyond African Americans, to include all types of racial discrimination, and economic equality. And now, everything seems to be collapsing — environmental concerns, immigration, health care, and so on. That’s why a song like “I Will Stand” addresses all of those things. There isn’t a day that goes by that something in that song isn’t addressed.

TELL ME ABOUT THIS FACEBOOK RANT YOU SET TO MUSIC. HAVE YOU EVER DONE THAT BEFORE? I’m a cathartic writer. You’re often looking for the right word, or a phrase will catch you, and it goes from there. This satisfied a desire on my part to say a lot of things... As Mary would always say: “Noel, there’s a thin line between compromise and accomplice.” That figures prominently into it.

WHAT'S ON YOUR HORIZON FOR 2018? WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON? Well, in 2018 I’ll be working on and putting out a holiday album. I’ve never done a holiday album, and I’m expecting that to come out in the fall. I’ve got eight songs written, and I’m holding the door open to see if another four will fall into place ... my door is always open.

14 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

PHOTO: BDN FILE

AS SOMEONE THAT'S LIVED IN MAINE FOR ALL THESE YEARS, YOU ARE REALLY ENMESHED IN THE COMMUNITY. ARE YOU ABLE TO SEPARATE NOEL THE CITIZEN FROM NOEL THE FAMOUS MUSICIAN? HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO PLAY ALL THESE BENEFIT CONCERTS FOR ALL THESE CAUSES WITHOUT GETTING OVERWHELMED? I’m very aware of trading on my fame. I know it’s there, and I have to deal with it. But, I think for me, like anyone that decides at the end of the year who to donate to or volunteer for, I decide where I can help and how I can help.

And it helps that I have an extra gift I can put in the stocking, and that’s my music. I also think what I do has a lot more impact when the tune aligns with the cause — it feels authentic. I’m so fortunate to have a platform that I inherited from giants like Pete Seeger and Woody Guthrie... and, let’s face it, I’m probably not going to be approached by the NRA to do a benefit.

Maine’s

FOLK LEGEND Noel Paul Stookey talks about music, politics and what’s to come in 2018.

BY EMILY BURNHAM

Noel Paul Stookey poses for a photo at his home studio in Blue Hill. www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 15

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

OBSESSIONS

OBSESSIONS WHAT WE CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF THIS MONTH.

BOOKS “THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF OZ: AN ILLUSTRATED HISTORY OF THE AMERICAN CLASSIC,” by John Fricke — There was a satisfying suck and click as our VCR took in the home recording of “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz,” that my uncle had recorded for me. My first time watching it, I was enthralled with the music, the characters, the story, the whole package. And so began a lifetime of fascination with the fantasy story written by L. Frank Baum, in 1900. He was a magazine editor, a father and the man whose imaginative telling of the story spawned so many adaptations, films, plays, musicals, books and merchandise. When this book, filled with both the history of the story and its adaptations as well as pictures of products, books, posters and more, landed on my desk, I stopped everything to begin reading it. For true fans of Baum’s work and the work it has inspired, this is a must-own.

“READY PLAYER ONE,” by Ernest Cline — This isn’t a new book, but this is the time to read it with a movie slated for release this spring. Moreover, it was one that I couldn’t stop reading.

Published in 2011, “Ready Player One” is about a future world in which a virtual reality game called the OASIS has become where many people spend their days — working, attending school, forging friendships and more. With the world outside ravaged by an energy crisis, the virtual world becomes so real for players that when its cofounder dies, leaving his fortune to whomever can win a game he creates, thousands embark on quests to solve his riddles and win his fortune. Among them is Wade Watts, a high school senior who lives his life primarily inside the OASIS who becomes the first avatar to clear the first level of the game. But in this dystopian future, the stakes are high, the dangers aren’t just online and nothing is as it seems.

“AMERICAN SEAFOOD: HERITAGE, CULTURE & COOKERY FROM SEA TO SHINING SEA,” by Barton Seaver — Positioned as a go-to resource for home cooks, culinary students and more, this book looks at the evolution of seafood cuisine in the United States, and the associated maritime history. It’s important to note that this isn’t a cookbook, but rather everything you might need to know about taste, culinary movements and more told through the lens of the seafood industry by an expert who ran several successful restaurants. Seaver, now the director of the Healthy and Sustainable Seafood Program at the Center for Health and the Global Environment at Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health, was named Chef of the Year

by Esquire Magazine in 2009. And he will be in Bangor on January 16 for a special dinner at Novio’s on Harlow. Tickets are, unfortunately, sold out.

—SARAH WALKER CARON

MOVIE THE POST It’s the early 1970s and the country’s first female newspaper publisher, Kate Graham (Meryl Streep) of The Washington Post must work with editor Ben Bradlee (Tom Hanks) to catch up with The New York Times to expose a massive government conspiracy that spanned three decades and four presidents. This is the story of the publishing of the Pentagon Papers, leaked documents regarding the U.S. government’s involvement in the Vietnam War. In the tradition of “All The President’s Men,” and “Spotlight,” I am hopeful that this film will give us an inspiring look into the work of journalists to shine a light into the darkest parts of our world. There was a limited release of this film in December with a wide release planned for Jan. 12, 2018.

—SARAH WALKER CARON

Thank you for

SUBSCRIBING!

PHOTOS: PURESTOCK & CINDYGOFF/THINKSTOCK

MAGAZINE GIRLS’ WORLD It’s tough to be a mom in today’s fast-paced, technology-driven world, but even more so when you have a young daughter who reads well above her grade level and doesn’t miss a beat. My 6-year-old wants to grow up much too fast for my liking, and it can be difficult to find age-appropriate reading material that’s on par with her reading level and interests — fashion, celebrities, makeup and hair, etc.

During a trip to the grocery store, she asked to look at the magazine section. I was skeptical at first when she picked up a copy of Girls’ World magazine, thinking it could lead to conversations I wasn’t ready to have.

I was pleasantly surprised that, although it looks like a “big girl” magazine, the pages are filled with content that’s perfect for her. Crafts that we can do together that don’t turn into Pinterest fails, recipes that don’t require hours of prep and meticulous measurements, quizzes that make her consider the world around her, and fashion tips that make sense for elementary school.

—AIMEE THIBODEAU

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www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 17

FOOD & DRINK

OBSESSIONS

OBSESSIONS WHAT WE CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF THIS MONTH.

BEER AVALON DOUBLE IPA BATTERY STEELE BREWING WHY DO WE LOVE IT? I think “Farmers Market of Beer” is the best way to describe Portland’s cluster of breweries on Industrial Way. Allagash Brewing Company is the big one, but just across the street in a large warehouse is a group of up-and-coming craft breweries — each offering a fun and tasty selection of delicious brews. It’s where Bissell Brothers got their start (The Substance Ale is a bright and tasty drink that you can find on tap occasionally at Verve in Bangor, among other places). It’s now home to Foundation Brewing, Austin Street Brewing (I highly recommend their Patina pale ale — like, really highly), and the newest addition: Battery Steele Brewing.

Full disclosure, one of the co-founders, Jacob Condon, is a friend of mine — he and partner Shane Noble are also Gritty McDuff’s alumni, so you know they know their way around some beer. They’re most popular brews are two double IPAs, Flume and Avalon (the later being my personal favorite). Hoppy with a hazy golden color, it’s a full and tasty drink to enjoy this winter.

The brewery is currently expanding and an imperial stout brewed with Standard Baking Company morning buns and vanilla beans is also on the way — and might soon be my new favorite.

You’ll find Foundation, Austin Street and Battery Steele at 1 Industrial Way in Portland. But keep an eye out — they’ve also been known to pop up on the rotating tap at Nocturnem Draft Haus and in cans at Giacomo’s in Bangor and Tiller & Rye in Brewer.

—AMY ALLEN

RFM BURGER RIVERSIDE FARM RESTAURANT & WINE MARKET IN OAKLAND WHY DO WE LOVE IT? This burger is the perfect brunch meal — equal parts breakfast and lunch. It’s topped with cheddar, maple bacon jam, red wine shallots, green goddess dressing, mixed greens, and a fried local farm egg, all on a brioche bun. It was perfectly done the way I like it (pink in the middle) with lots of interesting tastes all coming together.

The setting is part of the appeal and very relaxing with live piano jazz and comfy seating. During warmer months there’s a deck overlooking the water.

The business started out as a small farm stand in 1990, eventually adding more products and a restaurant. The farm provides fresh produce for the restaurant and the market offers a variety of specialty foods and a large selection of wine. Visit their website at riversidefarmmarket.com for the full menu and hours.

—BARB MOWER 18 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

PHOTOS: (BEER) COURTESY OF BATTERY STEELE BREWING; (BURGER) ALFEROVA EVGENIYA (GESHAS), GENIUSKP & ALLEKO/THINKSTOCK

RESTAURANT DISH

CONDIMENT GROWN-UP KETCHUP COMES WITH HAND-CUT PARMESAN FRIES AT TIMBER

Beer, burgers and fries all

made our list

this month.

We see a pattern!

WHY DO WE LOVE IT? The fries are a delightful palatepleaser, but I’ll be honest, it’s all about the ketchup. It’s a dipping phenomenon. I received two dips with my fries — one was mayo-based, the other was “Grown-Up Ketchup” — a condiment like I’ve never had before. I dipped every single fry in that glistening ramekin full of goodness.

Spicy Grown-Up Ketchup can’t shake a stick at Heinz.

Sure, maybe that plate of fries was meant to be shared, but I was slapping hands to keep others away. The chef’s oeuvre with tomatoes and spice was everything I’ve always wanted in a ketchup. A little kick, not particularly spicy, and the perfect compliment to those parmesan fries.

Timber is located at 22 Bass Park Blvd. in Bangor, and open Monday-Thursday from 11 a.m. to 11 p.m., Friday-Saturday 11 a.m. to midnight, and Sundays 10 a.m. to 10 p.m.

—MICHELE DWYER

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 19

FOOD & DRINK

IN SEASON NOW

In Season Now:

PARSNIPS STORY & PHOTOS BY SARAH WALKER CARON

FIRST BROUGHT TO North America in the 1600s, parsnips originally hail from Europe. But despite their long history in America, they’ve never quite gained the popularity of other veggies here. There’s no cartoon bunnies munching on them or fictional kids requesting seconds.

Maybe it’s time to change that.

Fried Rice Style Roasted Vegetable Quinoa Serves 4 2 cups (heaping) thinly sliced cabbage (in strips) 2 parsnips, peeled and cut into chunks 2 carrots, peeled and cut into chunks 2 yellow onions, peeled, sliced and quartered 2 tbsp olive oil, plus 1 tbsp divided 1 tsp kosher salt pepper, to taste ½ cup dry quinoa 2 cup water 1 tsp roasted sesame oil 2-4 tbsp soy sauce Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Arrange the cabbage, parsnips, carrots and onions on a nonstick baking sheet. Drizzle with 2 tablespoons olive oil.

Season with salt and pepper. Bake for 25 minutes. Stir. Bake for an additional 10-15 minutes, until tender and caramelized. Remove from the oven.

Meanwhile, in a medium saucepan combine the quinoa and water. Bring to a boil then reduce heat to medium-low. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes, or until all the water has been absorbed. Fluff with a fork.

In a large skillet, heat the remaining tablespoon of olive oil. Add the quinoa and roasted veggies and toss together. Toss with sesame oil and soy sauce (add a little at a time, tasting as you go and stopping when you reach the desired flavor). Cook for 2-3 minutes, until well combined throughout.

Remove from heat, serve and enjoy.

20 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

THE FIRST FROST OF THE YEAR TRANSFORMS THE PARSNIP’S STARCH TO SUGARS GIVING IT A SLIGHTLY SWEET FLAVOR. Parsnips, the creamy white root vegetable with a shape similar to a carrot, are available year round. But it’s not until fall and winter that they hit their peak season — and peak flavor. The first frost of the year transforms the parsnip’s starch to sugars giving it a slightly sweet flavor.

When buying parsnips, you want to avoid giant ones, instead selecting small to medium roots that aren’t limp.

Winter is when I love to roast parsnips for dishes like this — that hint of sweetness adds a nice dimension to recipes. When parsnips are young — newly picked — they need only be washed thoroughly to remove dirt. Older parsnips should be peeled before using.

In this recipe, parsnips play a bit part in a symphony of veggies that you can often find at farmers’ markets in the wintertime — onions and cabbage, carrots and parsnips.

SARAH WALKER CARON is a Bangor-based food writer and a senior editor for the Bangor Daily News.

She is also author of Sarah’s Cucina Bella food blog (www.sarahscucinabella.com) and a cookbook: “Grains as Mains: Modern Recipes Using Ancient Grains.”

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 21

FOOD & DRINK

RESTAURANTS

DAILY SPECIAL Where to find date night food and drink specials every night of the week.

BY CORALIE CROSS

MONDAY

T U E S D AY

THE ROOST

LAS PALAPAS

SPECIAL: $1 SLIDERS • $3 BUD AND BUD LIGHT

SPECIAL: BEEF, CHICKEN, BEAN TACOS FOR $1.25 EACH (SOFT OR HARD SHELL) • $6 JUMBO MARGARITAS • ½ PRICE 22OZ BUD AND BUD LIGHT

19 MILL ST., ORONO

Now, I have to admit, The Roost isn’t really my spot though I have been here. My husband, on the other hand, loves to hit this spot with a few of his friends on a Monday night to watch football or shoot pool. His go-to is their beer and slider special. For just $3 you can get a tall Bud or Bud Light and sliders are just $1 each so you can easily finish off the night only spending $6 to $10 a person.

8 BANGOR MALL BLVD., BANGOR

Tuesday Nights are more up my alley.

Tacos and margaritas: what more could a girl want? At Las Palapas, located near Toys R Us off Hogan Road, there’s a choice of beef, chicken or bean tacos for $1.25 each. This would be a great option for the whole family. Three tacos is usually enough to fill me up. Meanwhile my husband can scarf down four or five. For drinks, their $6 jumbo margarita is my favorite while my husband likes the half price 22oz Bud or Bud Light. Between the two of us we can usually get out of there for about $20 (before the tip). Not too bad for a meal and drinks for two!

Shout out to my friend Nick for

taking the hit and ordering another round of tacos. I was too excited and ate mine before I 22 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

remembered to take a photo.

Coralie (with husband Jake)

did some local research on the best meal specials around.

I REALLY DON’T go out that much. However, I’ve become an expert on the local dinner and drink deals around Bangor. It’s partially my fault, I have been known to pipe up when I hear someone say they are going out on Tuesday evening, “Oh, you should go to Las Palapas for their tacos and margarita special!”

Even though I don’t go out every night, I dated my husband for 8 years before we married. We’ve had our fair share of nights out. So why not share what we’ve learned?

These are definitely not the only specials going on each night in the area — but they are some pretty good ones. Enjoy the food, leave a good tip, and don’t hestitate to get an Uber if you really enjoy the drink specials. But most importantly have a wonderful time!

WEDNESDAY

T H U R S D AY

F R I D A Y

TEXAS ROADHOUSE

BUFFALO WILD WINGS

GROUND ROUND

SPECIAL: $11.99 11OZ SIRLOIN DINNER

SPECIAL: 75¢ BONELESS WINGS

SPECIAL: $14.99 ALL YOU CAN EAT FISH FRY • $5 22OZ LONG ISLAND ICE TEA

PHOTOS: CORALIE CROSS; (TACOS) NICK RISSER; (TOP & SLIDERS) HUGNOI & REZ-ART/THINKSTOCK

504 STILLWATER AVE., BANGOR

If we are going out on Wednesday, we head over to Texas Roadhouse.

WARNING: Their rolls and butter are amazing. If you’re not careful you’ll be full before your food even gets to your table, which would be a shame because the 11oz sirloin dinner is amazing. On any other day the sirloin and two sides would run you $16.99 but if you get there on Wednesday you can have all of this for just $11.99. There are no set drink specials on Wednesdays though so this might be the day to just have a water with your meal. Two people can leave with enough leftovers for Thursday’s lunch for under $30.

461 STILLWATER AVE., BANGOR

Thursday is wing night! Head over to Buffalo Wild Wings, or BDubs as the cool kids are calling it, and eat your heart out. Obviously a place named after their wings will have plenty of options for sauces and seasonings; I’m not going to list them all out here, you will have to go check it out for yourselves! Get there during happy hour between 2 and 7 p.m. or 9 p.m. to close to enjoy one of their many drink specials!

248 ODLIN ROAD, BANGOR

I always look forward to Fridays. This is the weekly special my husband and I probably take advantage of the most, maybe because Friday is usually the easiest day for us to find time to go out together. Plus, we’ve been enjoying the Long Island ice tea at Ground Round since we were old enough to drink. The food special on Fridays is an all-you-can-eat fish fry for $14.99 which I have heard very good things about. Unfortunately I’m just not a big fan of fish. However, the food here is always excellent and I have a couple favorite dishes that I rotate between.

I will note that the Long Island ice tea can be quite strong. If having more than one, I would highly recommend walking over to Hollywood Cinema after dinner and enjoying a movie for a couple hours before driving home.

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 23

HEALTH & FITNESS

HIKE ME

Scenic

SNOWSHOE

TREKS

Beautiful trails for winter walking.

STORY & PHOTOS BY AISLINN SARNACKI SNOWFLAKES FILTERED through gaps in the evergreen canopy, floating through the dark woods to settle on her wool hat. The forest was quiet — the special type of quiet that exists only during a snowstorm. She walked, leaving boot prints in the frozen, white carpeted ground. And in minutes, the prints were gone, buried by the fast-falling snow.

The blue rectangles painted on the trees to mark the trail were easy to spot in the otherwise grey and white world. Young balsam fir trees lined the trail, overshadowed by their towering ancestors.

Cloaked in white, the short trees looked like tiny tents, a crowded encampment for the creatures of the forest — the squirrels, mice and snowshoe hares.

At Branch Lake, the trail turned to run along the frozen shore, where the snowfall formed a curtain of white, creating the illusion that the lake stretched on forever. There at the edge of the ice, she dusted off a boulder and sat. And as the icy cold of the earth slowly seeped through the seat of her insulated pants, she felt grounded, as if she herself might turn to granite — or perhaps melt into the beautiful landscape, like the snowflakes melting on her cheeks.

24 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

BRANCH LAKE PUBLIC FOREST IN ELLSWORTH EASY

THIS 1,200-ACRE public forest features a network of hiking trails that altogether totals 2.6 miles, connected by a wide tote road that is about 0.75-mile long and is closed to vehicles, making for an ideal easy snowshoe location. Though still evolving, the trail network currently includes Pine, Brookside and Marsh trails, which travel through a mixed forest with plenty of large, old trees, and impressive glacial erratics. And there’s also the Lake Loop Trail, which is a little less than a mile long and leads to several outlooks along the shore of Branch Lake.

Dogs are permitted on the trails if on a leash no more than eight feet in length. For more information, call the City of Ellsworth at 207-667-2563.

DIRECTIONS: From the corner of Main Street and Route 1A in downtown Ellsworth, drive approximately 6.5 miles north on Route 1A, then turn left onto a gravel access road marked with a large brown sign that reads “Branch Lake Public Forest.” Drive about 1 mile to a small parking area to the left of a gate barring off the rest of the road to vehicle traffic. This road leads to all of the trails in the public forest. www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 25

HEALTH & FITNESS

HIKE ME

BLUEBERRY LEDGES TRAIL IN BAXTER STATE PARK MODERATE

A POPULAR DAY hike and snowshoe route in Baxter State Park, Blueberry Ledges Trail is easily accessible from the famous Golden Road, which is open to vehicle traffic year round. Spurring off the Appalachian Trail not far from Abol Bridge, the wide Blueberry Ledges Trail travels gradually uphill through beautiful forest of young white birch and poplar trees to Blueberry Ledges, an open stream valley that features smooth granite ledges. At the ledges, a side trail leads to the left to where Katahdin Stream tumbles over the rock, forming little waterfalls.

Hiking to the trail’s highlight natural feature, Blueberry Ledges, from the trailhead on the Golden Road, is a 2.1-mile hike, making for an out-and-back hike of 4.2 miles. This section of the trail is fairly wide with a gradual incline. However, the trail continues past the ledges for 3 miles, ending at Park Tote Road just south of Katahdin Stream Campground.

This section of the trail climbs a steep hill and is narrower and more challenging, so feel free to explore this portion of the hike if you’re feeling ambitious.

DIRECTIONS: In downtown Millinocket, where Route 157 intersects with Katahdin Avenue, head north on Katahdin Avenue, following signs directing to Baxter State Park. Drive 0.2 mile, then veer left onto Bates Street, continuing toward Baxter State Park. Drive 8.4 miles, then turn left onto a short gravel road that leads to the Golden Road, where you’ll turn right to continue north. Drive 9.9 miles on the Golden Road, being careful to stay out of the way of logging trucks and moose. Turn left to park in the large parking area just before Abol Bridge.

26 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

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Wednesday, January 10 • 5:30-7 p.m.

University of Maine Hutchinson Center • 80 Belmont Ave., Belfast

Visit aarp.org/dirigospeaks for details and to register in advance.

HEALTH & FITNESS

HIKE ME

SPRUCE MOUNTAIN IN ROCKPORT STRENUOUS

RISING 955 FEET above sea level, Spruce Mountain features a 2.5-mile hiking trail that leads through a mixed forest to three outlooks on the mountain’s ridge. The viewpoints provide spectacular views of Ragged Mountain, Mirror Lake, and the ocean beyond.

Spanning from Mount Pleasant Street and Route 17 in Rockport, the Spruce Mountain Trail is a part of the much longer Georges Highland Path, a 50-mile network of blue-blazed footpaths in Midcoast Maine built and maintained by the Georges River Land Trust.

This Spruce Mountain Trail is especially good for snowshoeing because it traverses gentle slopes and is almost completely in the forest, which means the trail markers are on trees, making them easy to follow year round. On the other hand, some of the neighboring mountains in the Midcoast region feature trails that travel over bald ridges and peaks, and these trails can be difficult to follow in the winter because snow covers the trail markers, which are rock piles called cairns and painted marks on the bedrock.

Dogs are permitted if kept on leash. For more information, call 207-594-5166.

DIRECTIONS: There are two options for hiking to the mountain’s summit. To reach the west trailhead on Route 17, start at the intersection of Route 17 and Route 90 in West Rockport and drive 1.8 miles north on Route 17; the parking area will be on your right, marked with a large wooden sign. To hike toward Spruce Mountain, cross the road and hike south on the Georges Highland Path.

To reach the east trailhead on Mount Pleasant Street, start on Route 17 in Hope, turn onto Harts Mill Road and drive 0.3 mile, then turn left onto Fogler Road and drive 0.6 mile. Turn left onto onto Mount Pleasant Street and drive about 1 mile to the vehicle 28 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Mirror Lake and the 1,300foot Ragged Mountain are seen from the east peak of Spruce Mountain.

The Georges Highland Path leads to the outlook.

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For more of Aislinn Sarnacki’s adventures, visit her blog at actoutwithaislinn.bangordailynews.com.

Follow her on Twitter: @1minhikegirl.

Her new guidebook, “Family-Friendly Hikes in Maine,” released in May 2017, is available at local bookstores, Down East Books and online booksellers.

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HEALTH & FITNESS

30 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Get ACTIVE! Real moms talk about the best workouts for busy moms.

PHOTO: KERKEZ/THINKSTOCK

BY AIMEE THIBODEAU

MOTHERHOOD — THERE’S NO EMPLOYEE manual, vacation time is never actually given because you never truly stop thinking about them and it’s been said it’s the toughest job you’ll ever love. So why do we do it? What keeps us going?

The answers are fairly simple, but often can be easier said than done.

No matter what the activity is, time away from children isn’t neglecting their needs. In fact, it often means becoming a better mom.

“We need time to interact with adults. Moms spend so much time with our kids, we need time to challenge our minds and our body, need time to reduce stress, we need to remind ourselves that we are teaching and role modeling for our kids, so showing our kids how to be active and why it’s important is crucial,” said Sharise Roberts, a mother of three who moved to Maine a little more than two years ago. “Our kids want to grow up and be just like us some day. We also need to remember that we are a person first before we were a mom — being active allows this to happen.”

And it doesn’t have to take away from being a good spouse, mother, or employee.

“Sometimes my workout is the only 30 minutes of me-time I get in a day. It is necessary for not only my physical health, but my mental health — it’s my stress relief,” said Molly Briggs of Hampden. “As a mom, it is important for my daughter to see me exercise and understand that it’s an important part of being healthy.”

The articles about the benefits moms see when they exercise are seemingly endless, but how do you put it into practice?

The honest answer: Any way you can.

For some, it’s 10 minutes at a time whenever they can fit it in throughout the day.

“Whatever I can do, whenever I can fit it in,” said Steph Young of Alton. “Whether it’s an hour at 5 a.m., 10 minutes three times sporadically throughout the day, or 6 in the evening. Whether it’s at the gym, at home, outside or wherever my kids happened to be at practice. If I can’t find the time for it, I start getting really resentful.”

For others, it’s all about creating a routine or finding an exercise outlet they love.

While some — mostly those with older children — make it a priority to get to the gym at least a few times a week.

When you’ve got small children, or multiple kids who need to be chauffeured to and from activities, it can be difficult to make time to hit the gym. That’s when technology lends a hand.

There are hundreds of apps, YouTube videos, and online resources for moms who find themselves with early mornings or late nights to get in their 30 minutes of activity. A few of the most popular include HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training), Jillian Michaels 20-Minute Workouts, and Beachbody On Demand.

“Beachbody On-Demand [offers] all kinds of different workouts,” explained Kyla Malbon Harrison of Old Town. “Most are 30 minutes or less, and prevents www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 31

HEALTH & FITNESS

“NOW THAT MY KIDS ARE A LITTLE OLDER I CAN TAKE CLASSES AND ENJOY THE TIME I GET TO TALK WITH OTHERS, AND I FEEL MORE ACCOUNTABLE WITH WITH,” ASHLEY THORNTON SAID. “I ALSO NOTICED THAT WHEN I AM ACTIVE, WE ARE MUCH MORE ACTIVE AS A FAMILY.” 32 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

PHOTO: ND3000/THINKSTOCK

THE GROUP OF PEOPLE I WORK OUT

boredom due to the many different options. All can be done from an iPhone, iPad, etc. You can even download them to your device, so they can be done when a wifi connection isn’t available.”

There is something to be said, however, about getting out of the house, interacting with other grownups and having adult conversation.

“I go to Golds Gym and Les Mills classes,” said Emily McIntosh, a mother of three from Brewer. “I like to socialize and have some time away from Alice [my youngest daughter]. Before that was an option for me, I did workouts at home through fitnessblender.com. Thirty minutes and I was done and felt like I had accomplished something!”

Ashley Thornton, mother of two from Milford, agreed.

“Before it was an option for me to leave, I did Beachbody workouts at home. Now that my kids are a little older I can take classes and enjoy the time I get to talk with others, and I feel more accountable with the group of people I work out with,” she said.

“I also noticed that when I am active, we are much more active as a family.”

Teaching children to be accountable for their food choices and activity is much easier when they see their parents participating in healthy behaviors and making nutritious choices. “[It’s] so important for our kids to see us move our bodies and be healthy,” said Michelle Sturgeon Lounsbury, a mom of two from Boston, Massachusetts. She noted the importance of strength training, but stated that simply walking has immense health benefits and is something everyone can do.

“Walking is amazing for resetting those hormones when under times of stress, lack of sleep, etc., which can increase cravings for sugar,” she said.

And then there’s the moms like Sharisse Roberts, aka Central Maine Roller Derby skater Feliz Bashit.

“It’s something that transcends motherhood — something I did before I was a mom and still continue to do as a mom … it encourages and allows me to display myself as a strong, confident woman and be a great role model for my kids,” she said. “We spend so much time taking care of others, we need to take care of ourselves as it makes us a better mom.”

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 33

HOW TO

MAKE SNOW GLOBES

LET IT SNOW! A snowy indoor craft to keep busy on cold days. BY AMY ALLEN THERE’S NO SUCH THING as too much glitter. Well, maybe — some of our snow globe displays were caught in a full sparkle blizzard. Keeping little hands busy when the weather turns too cold for outdoor fun can be challenging — making snow globes is a great way to spend time with friends and have some indoor fun.

We discovered fillable plastic snow globes at A.C. Moore which made our project really easy — though making these in old jelly or mason jars works just as well. If you go that route, we recommend building up a bit of a base so your display sits high enough above the neck of the jar to be clearly seen. Add a bead of hot glue around the rim of the finalized jar to keep the contents from leaking.

For the glitter, bigger worked better. Larger, chunkier glitter floated around the best; just add a drop of glycerine to your water to help the glitter float slowly. And have fun!

What you’ll need: • Jars or fillable plastic globes (we found ours at A.C. Moore) • Ceramic or plastic figurines • Distilled water • Glycerine • Glitter — larger, chunkier glitter worked best for us • Sandpaper • Hot glue • Washi tape

34 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

STEP-BY-STEP 1. Use sandpaper to scuff the base of your snow globe and the bottom of any display items. This will help the hot glue stick better.

2. Choose your items to display. Using hot glue, build a base and cover with glitter to help disguise the bottom of your snowglobe. If you use a jar, build the base up high enough to be seen above the neck of the jar. Using plenty of hot glue, position your decorations in place.

3. Fill your globe with as much glitter as you would like.

We mixed different kinds together; some of us went crazy and nearly buried our displays, others held back and just used about a tablespoon or two. Next add the water and a drop of glycerine. Keep in mind that your display will displace some of the water — we tested and then went back and added more water as needed.

4. A stripe of washi tape around the base adds a finishing touch.

A bead of hot glue will offer added waterproofing protection.

HOW TO

MAKE AN ABSTRACT PAINTING

Simple ABSTRACT WAVE PAINTING Create your own work of art — simply and quickly.

STORY & PHOTOS BY KATIE SMITH

MAKING YOUR OWN ARTWORK doesn’t have to time consuming or complicated. Abstract wave painting is an easy technique that only requires a few supplies and about 20 minutes of work. And fear not! There is literally no way to mess up your work of art with a beautiful marbled effect.

Don’t limit yourself to a wave design either. Try a circle, stripes, or cover the entire canvas, then stand back and marvel at your masterpiece.

36 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

What you’ll need: • Canvas

• Drop cloth • Paint in colors of your choice (if you don’t have all the colors you want, mixing white or ivory into a color you already have to make a lighter shade) • Ruler or straightedge • Squirt bottle filled with water

Directions:

1. Make sure you use a drop cloth for this project. It not only protects the underlying surface, but catches excess paint too. This technique works by putting more paint on your canvas than you actually need so it can spread nicely. The paint will drip off the sides (don't worry, there is an easy solution to clean that up), and you will want to wipe off your straight edge when you go back over your painting to touch it up.

2. Squirt small blobs of paint on your canvas all the way across the bottom, up one side, and a few going back down, then give them a few squirts of water. This helps the paints run into each other to create a nice marbled effect.

3. Starting at the left-hand side, drag your straight edge across the bottom, up the side, then back down following your paint dots creating a wave. You might need to go over it again with your straight edge to fill in any empty spots or get the shape you want. Be sure to wipe the straight edge off before going over it a second time though. If too many paint colors meld together, you’ll lose the marbled look.

4. Give it a few more squirts of water and let the colors run into each other a bit more.

5. To clean up the paint drips from the sides, take a paper towel and rub the frame of your picture. It gives it a nice finished look while wiping the drips away.

Remember, it's just paint. You really can't mess it up. It you aren't happy, just let it dry and start over.

HOME & FAMILY

GETTING

PHOTO: KATARZYNABIALASIEWICZ/THINKSTOCK

Cozy

38 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

hy∙gge [hue-gah] noun A Danish word for a quality of cosiness and comfortable that comes from doing simple things such as lighting candles, baking, or spending time at home with your family.

How hygge can help you fall in love with Maine winters.

BY CRYSTAL SANDS

IT’S 10 BELOW zero. The wind is whipping. The trees are bare, and the ice in your backyard is frozen solid. During times like these, it may be difficult love winter here in Maine.

But hygge, a Danish word used to describe a certain coziness or comfort in a simple life, is helping some winter-weary Mainers find the joy in winter.

Really more of a way of life and thinking during the winter in Scandinavian countries, hygge (pronounced HOO-gah, only with your throat closed a little for the “hoo”) can involve everything from comfort food and candles to cozy blankets, handknit items, and a lot of snuggle time. Denmark consistently ranks as one of the happiest countries in the world, and it seems the Danish have long held a secret to happiness during winter that may be beneficial to those of us here in Maine.

Marie Tourell Soderberg, author of the 2016 book “Hygge: The Danish Art of Happiness,” says that the key is to not let the rough winter weather get you down and to change your mindset about the cold and the dark. Retreating inside and making your home a warm and cozy place — a place you like to be — is an important part of hygge.

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 39

HOME & FAMILY

HOW TO HYGGE While hygge is really about your approach to winter and focusing on the positive aspects — warm fires, time with family 40 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

and good food, for example — it may be difficult to shift how we see winter.

“We are constantly moving toward bigger, better, faster, stronger. This leaves very little attention for the small, everyday moments of happiness,” Soderberg said.

So one of the first steps to hygge is about taking the time to find the joy in the little pleasures of winter. This can begin simply by working with the things you have in your home and activities you’re already doing — and just making the joy a focus.

Cherie Galyean of Bar Harbor says that she and her family were practicing hygge before it was such a big thing. “I struggle mightily with seasonal depression,” Galyean said. She and her family took steps to embrace winter and live a hygge life during the winter months.

“I leave a few strands of twinkle lights up after Christmas because I like the soft lighting. Candles every night at dinner, no

exceptions. Build a fire in the wood stove and make sure we take time to enjoy it,” Galyean said. “Lots of baking, both for comfort food and to make the house smell good. For me, it really is less about stuff — or even doing things differently — and more about intention and appreciation.”

HYGGE ON A BUDGET Although there are certainly things you can buy to help you enjoy hygge in your home, it’s not about the things or the money. In fact, there are many things around our homes to help in hygge efforts.

Using old candles at meals or in the evenings, playing board games, snuggling up with a favorite blanket and book are excellent ways to practice hygge. Hanging Christmas lights in the kitchen or just leaving your Christmas lights up until the weather warms are other excellent ways to hygge without spending money.

PHOTO: PUHIMEC/THINKSTOCK

She says hygge is about “finding pleasure in your surroundings.” This could mean “having a favorite chair in the corner where you read a book or drink a cup of tea while looking out on the wild weather outside.”

Topsham resident Chris Wolff, who was born in Denmark, grew up mostly in the United States but was raised with Danish traditions. She says that the Danish find ways to embrace the long dark winters and make efforts to keep their homes bright, cheerful, and simple. That includes whitewash wood and lightly colored walls and furniture. These aesthetic choices help the Danish bring in as much light as possible during the dark months, which helps with their mental outlook toward the darkness.

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“In our [American] culture, we try so hard to acquire so much, but part of the Danish aesthetic is more simplicity. It’s more about loving the things you bring into your house,” Wolff said.

Indeed, hygge is most certainly not about buying products from a hygge website. “I think that Americans have sort of glommed onto this concept of hygge, and, in our way, made it into a thing about having the right stuff. In doing that, we miss the point, which is to focus on what makes life fun and the dark, cold months bearable: friends, warm food, and maybe a soft blanket and some twinkly lights,” says Brittany Kallman Arneson, an editor and academic who spent time understanding hygge while visiting Norway and Iceland this year.

NATURE IS ESSENTIAL While warm and cozy are essential to hygge, getting outside in winter is equally

important. It’s important not to let the snow and ice keep us indoors too much, as being active and getting some sunshine will make a big difference when it comes to our winter mental health.

Heading outside for a long winter walk and then coming inside for some hot cocoa by the fire is a perfect way to practice hygge and celebrate winter. Wolff says she walks her dog every day and then comes in to her wood stove, which feels especially warm after a good long walk.

After the holidays, winter is often most difficult for many of us here in Maine, but with a little hygge in our lives, it doesn’t have to be that way. There’s much joy to be had in our lives during the long, cold winter. According to Soderberg, “learning to hygge means slowing down a little, making a space, and opening up to all the small, magical moments that are right in front of us.” www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 41

FEATURE

IN CONVERSATION

Behind THE BOOK

Parenting tips from Amy Morin’s “13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do.”

BY EMILY MORRISON

42 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

PHOTOS: (SELFIES) EMILY MORRISON; (BOOK) VYSOCHYNSKA

IF SOMEONE HAD TOLD ME in middle school that my best friend would become an international bestselling author, I would have spit out my Jolt and said, “Who, Amy? She doesn’t even talk in class!” I never shut up, and she never spoke up — the winning combination most coming of age stories have been based on since the dawn of time.

Think Huck and Tom, Romy and Michele, Bill and Ted, all rolled into one awesome braces wearing (me), coke-bottle glasses sporting (Amy) duo.

Outside of school, Amy was the funniest, coolest, most talkative girl I knew. Our adventures may not have involved rafts, high school reunions, or time machines, but man, we had fun. We tented out in her backyard, double-dog-dared each other to jump in the pool in our softball uniforms, sledded through the winter, and went to the movies in Pittsfield every Friday night. And we did it all in a time when kids wrote notes by hand and passed them back and forth under tables instead of through the ether of cyberspace.

Life was good for us and to us for a long time. College saw her staying in Maine to receive a Masters in Social Work and me going to Vermont to earn a Bachelor’s in Education. Luckily, this thing called the internet happened, so we emailed each other whenever we didn’t have money to call or cars to go the five hour distance.

We married young, went to work fresh out of college, and began dreaming of starting our own families.

The next decade of Amy’s life reads like something out of a sad film script. She lost her mother at 23, her husband at 26, and her father-in-law at 34. Grief isn’t something I’ve had much experience with, but seeing my best friend weather loss after crippling loss, I marveled at how Amy found the mental and emotional strength to keep going. Then I read her article, “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do,” and I began to understand where her resilience came from: a dogged determination not to feel sorry for herself or expect anything more from the world than what she’d been given.

Forbes picked up her blog post and just like that, the voice I’ve been listening to since

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 43

FEATURE

IN CONVERSATION

age 13, went viral. Her blog became a book than I thought and more capable than HOW CAN PARENTS HELP NURTURE and the response was much the same — I predicted. I was a shy kid who was THAT STRENGTH? within three months it was an international comfortable being in the middle of the AM: Kids have a remarkable capacity for bestseller translated into 28 languages. pack — whether it was on the sports resilience. No matter what they’ve endured In reading through the overwhelming field or in the classroom. But my parents or how many problems they have, they can response, Amy discovered the most challenged me to do my best. And I learned build mental strength. But, we have to teach frequently asked question had to do with that hard work and stepping outside my them, step-by-step, how to build the mental parenting: “How can I teach my kids to be comfort zone were important steps in muscle they’re going to need to become mentally strong?” As a foster parent and reaching my greatest potential. responsible adults. devoted aunt, Amy wanted to address the My parents were excellent role models It’s important for parents to teach tough issues parents face, so she wrote a who stayed true to their values. They didn’t kids that everyone has the ability to grow second book, “13 Things Mentally Strong just tell us to be kind or to help others — stronger and we’re all a work in progress.

Parents Don’t Do: Raising Self-Assured they showed us. I did share a few stories Finding teachable moments in everyday Children and Training Their Brains for a about my family in the book, especially in life can be key to helping kids learn how Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success.” the introduction! to regulate their thoughts, manage their As a mother of three and emotions, and take positive action. sojourner on the path to mental strength myself, I asked Amy if WHEN CHILDREN EXPERIENCE IT’S IMPORTANT FOR PARENTS TO HEARTBREAK, MOST PARENTS she’d be willing to share some of her insights from her new VIEW THEMSELVES AS “GUIDES” WANT TO SHIELD THEM FROM book with Bangor Metro and, as THE PAIN. HOW DO WE KNOW RATHER THAN “PROTECTORS.” WHEN TO PROTECT THEM always, she had my back.

WHEN YOU GUIDE YOUR KIDS, FROM HEARTBREAK AND WHAT DO YOU THINK SOME WHEN TO HELP THEM FIND YOU’LL WALK ALONGSIDE THEM WAYS TO COPE? PEOPLE GET WRONG ABOUT MENTAL STRENGTH? Parents know their kids best, DURING PAINFUL EXPERIENCES, AM: AMY MORIN: The biggest but it’s important to note that most misconception I hear is that some RATHER THAN STANDING IN FRONT parents underestimate what their parents think “being strong” is kids are capable of doing. Give your OF THEM AND PROTECTING THEM kids the tools they need to cope the same as “acting tough.” For example, I have parents who come with painful experiences. The more FROM HEARTACHE. into my therapy office saying tools they have, the more pain they things like, “I’m so proud of my can endure. son. He didn’t even cry when Getting cut from the team, Grandma died.” But being mentally strong WHAT DO YOU FEEL IS THE HARDEST failing a test, and disagreements with isn’t about suppressing your emotions. It’s “THING” TO BREAK AND WHY? HAVE friends are just a few of the painful about being aware of your feelings so you YOU EVER FELT YOURSELF FALLING childhood experiences that kids can learn can identify how those emotions are likely to INTO THAT HABIT YOURSELF? and grow from. But it’s important for influence your thoughts and your behavior.

AM: I think the answer about which parents to view themselves as “guides” Kids who are mentally strong are able “thing” is “hardest” depends on the person. rather than “protectors.” When you guide to face their fears — but that doesn’t I’ve heard a lot of differing answers from your kids, you’ll walk alongside them mean they accept a dare just because readers so far. It seems like every parent has during painful experiences, rather than their friends called them a ‘chicken.’ And one or two that feel especially challenging. standing in front of them and protecting it doesn’t mean they are overconfident or For me, as a foster parent, I think them from heartache. think they’re invincible. not shielding kids from pain can be the Instead, mentally strong kids know how hardest. Kids in foster care have been WHAT DO YOU FEEL IS THE BIGGEST to cope with their emotions in a healthy through a lot already so it’s tempting STUMBLING BLOCK PARENTS FACE way, think realistically, and take positive to try and prevent them from having to WHEN TRYING TO INSTILL “CORE action regardless of the situation they find experience any more hardship. But letting VALUES” IN THEIR CHILDREN? WHY themselves in. them solve their own problems or learn ARE VALUES SO HARD TO TEACH? how to cope with pain in a healthy way AM: A lot of parents don’t know what WHICH OF THESE 13 HABITS DID YOUR is important to their development. They their values are. And many more aren’t PARENTS BREAK? NO SERIOUSLY, WHAT need successful experiences so they can teaching their values to their kids. It can be DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOUR PARENTS gain confidence in themselves. uncomfortable to admit what you think is DID RIGHT WHEN THEY RAISED YOU? really important in life. For example, would DO SPEAK ABOUT ANY OF THESE FROM YOUR TIME AS A FOSTER you rather the teacher said your child was EXPERIENCES IN YOUR BOOK? PARENT AND AN AWESOME AUNT, the smartest or kindest kid in the class?

AM: One of the biggest lessons my WHAT DO YOU SEE AS THE GREATEST Studies show most parents want their parents taught me was that I was stronger STRENGTH CHILDREN POSSESS AND kids to be kind. But most kids think their 44 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

parents value achievement over all else. So if you really value kindness, ask yourself, how much time do you spend talking about being kind? How much time do you invest into showing your kids how to be kind? Then, think about how much time you spend talking about homework or how much energy you put into helping your kids get good grades. Your kids pay more attention to what you do, rather than what you say.

THERE’S AN OLD ADAGE THAT SAYS, “GIVE THEM ROOTS AND WINGS,” IN REFERENCE TO RAISING CHILDREN. THOUGH THE PARADOX IS IMPOSSIBLE, WOULD YOU AGREE THAT THIS IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST CHALLENGES TO RAISING WELLADJUSTED, INDEPENDENT CHILDREN? AM: In my psychotherapy office, I’ve worked with a lot of parents who struggle to see the big picture. They raise obedient children who get good grades but their kids aren’t equipped for the challenges of the real world.

I also work with parents who struggle to let go. Some of them love to feel needed and rather than deal with their sadness that their kids are growing up, they enable them to stay dependent.

A recent survey of college students found that 60 percent of first-year students wish adults had spent more time teaching them emotional skills. They felt academically prepared for college, but didn’t know how to cope with feelings like loneliness or fear.

It’s important for parents to strive to raise kids who will become independent, strong adults — even though that can be uncomfortable for the parents sometimes.

Helping kids become aware of how they feel and guiding them down their path in life is the big print on a parent’s job description. “13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do” helps parents read the small print for the world’s hardest job. Amy enlarges for us what parenting mentally strong kids looks like in action: walking beside our children, living out our values and challenging them to become strong-minded, selfreliant adults. The beauty of Amy’s life, and now her life’s work, is in the truth she has found through tragedy and triumph.

We are all works in progress, and we can always grow stronger. www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 45

FEATURE

GOING

Chapel TO THE

How to DIY your wedding for a memorable day.

BY ROSEMARY LAUSIER

A handmade sign welcomed guests to Aaron Skilling and Bob Kennedy’s wedding.

46 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

CREATING THE WEDDING of your dreams isn’t for the feint of heart. With so many aspects of the event to plan and manage, it can be a tremendous undertaking requiring a good deal of time, creativity and patience.

That can make the expense of a professional wedding planner really attractive.

But the payoff of planning a DIY wedding is considerable. When your special day unfolds in your vision, it’s an intimate, memorable affair with a personal touch that cannot be duplicated by someone else.

Here’s how some Maine couples have planned and created their dream weddings — often on smaller budgets and with shorter engagement periods.

INVITATIONS For Jack and Katherine Mullikin, including Jack’s grandmother in their Aug. 6, 2016 wedding was essential. So the couple turned to Grammie — Leigh Glenn — for an original design for their invitations. Glenn is a professional watercolor artist, and she drew inspiration from their wedding venue, the Maine Audubon in Falmouth, as well as their favorite flowers, plants and vegetables.

They then used this design for the rest of the invitation suite and table cards and had them printed off at a local print shop.

Katherine kept Leigh’s original design and it’s now framed in their apartment.

However, designing invitations at home can be both a time-saver and a cost-saver.

Using an online printing service, Aaron Skilling and Bob Kennedy were able to create save the date cards, invitations and thank you notes for both their January 14, 2017 ceremony and their July 29, 2017 reception from home.

It’s important to note that the traditional array of invitation related items aren’t right for every wedding.

Emerald and Kurt Forcier skipped save the dates for their Oct. 7, 2017 wedding on her parents’ property in Winterport.

With a short engagement — they married about three months after Kurt proposed — there wasn’t time for that. They also collected RSVPs digitally on their wedding website, speeding up the invitation process that way.

SIGNS Aaron and Bob decided to go all out on signage for their backyard reception in Gray. They held it in Aaron’s parents’ backyard, and used signs to help transform the space from parking area on.

Guests were welcomed with a bit of humor: “Leave your inner adult in the car and get silly.”

To make their signs, they used wooden pallets that they sanded, deconstructed and reassembled. These were painted and then the wording was added using letters they made with stencils and paint.

Signs can also add something fun and personal to the venue as well as they did for Jack and Katherine’s wedding.

Jack’s mom Lisa made a banner with photos from throughout Katherine’s and

Bob and Aaron used old windows to help direct guests to their tables.

KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

A watercolor by Jack’s grandmother served as inspiration for Jack and Katherine Mullikin’s wedding.

FIDELIO PHOTOGRAPHY

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FEATURE

A handmade centerpiece from Bob and Aaron’s wedding.

KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

Jack and Katherine incorporated stones from the beach where they got engaged into their table design.

FIDELIO PHOTOGRAPHY

Jack’s lives. They banner was hung both at the rehearsal dinner and inside the reception tent.

FLOWERS Growing up, Katherine watched her dad work in his flower garden and remembers the hours he spent on his favorite hobby. In the months leading up to the wedding, she asked him if he could grow flowers in the family garden to use for the reception such as snapdragons and cosmos. She thought it was a nice way to have her dad involved in the reception while also incorporating something meaningful from her life.

Katherine incorporated her dad’s flowers into the centerpieces using glass jars she bought from different antique stores. Similarly, Emerald used small jars that she borrowed from the YMCA and filled them with baby’s breath a friend bought at a local farmer’s market.

For their January ceremony at their Portland home, Aaron decided to “tackle” the flowers on his own. Using Pinterest as inspiration, along with guidance from Bob’s 48 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Emerald and Kurt used old photos to personalize their table settings.

PHONG DANG PHOTOGRAPHY

sister Jami, who works for a florist in Illinois, Aaron spent a couple weeks leading up to the ceremony making smaller pieces. With a lot of time and practice, Aaron was able to make the arrangements that were displayed around their home including the mantelpiece.

Jami’s advice: “Have a glass of wine and have fun with it.”

The night before her wedding, Nancy Newell made her bouquet and Nick’s boutonniere with flowers she bought from the supermarket. She got spring flowers, cut and organized them the way she wanted and put them together using ribbon and beads from a craft store.

“I find that you can go to grocery stores that already have great bouquets, which you can turn into smaller bouquets, table settings and boutonnieres,” said Nancy.

Couples don’t need to have over-thetop and extravagant floral arrangements at their wedding though. Simple, elegant arrangements like a bouquet can be tied together with ribbons and beads, and boutonnieres can be a simple flower pinned on the groom’s shirt work for

some couples too. Plus, couples can add anything they would like to them. At Katherine’s wedding rehearsal, a bee stung Jack in the eye. So for the ceremony, Jack added a bee pin to his boutonniere, a funny nod to the dramatic moment the night before.

CENTERPIECES & PLACECARDS Aaron and Bob incorporate drag queen names into their Christmas cards every year.

When planning their wedding, they decided to incorporate the tradition into their reception. Instead of table numbers, they gave the tables drag queen names such as “Sue Pository,” “Amanda Ryder-Bush” and “Tasha Salad.”

“It was funny to watch people’s reactions [to the names],” said Bob. “It was a novelty for the guests and funny for the DJ when they called out the table names,” added Aaron.

For Katherine and Jack, place cards took on a special significance when used more than 100 rocks from the beach they got engaged on for table assignments.

Katherine’s mom Mary used a sharpie to write a guest’s name on each rock.

Emerald and Kurt used this opportunity to incorporate photos into the reception.

Each table was labeled by a year such as 1984 and 1985 with photos of themselves from that particular year on the front and back of the centerpiece.

FOOD Nancy and Nick wanted a small and casual reception where they could gather with friends and have a good time. So they decided to have a barbecue at home and cook their own food. Nancy stayed up the night before the wedding and prepared all the food including various kabobs, salads and veggie platters. When they got back to their house after their ceremony at the Lucerne Inn, Nancy, in her wedding dress, and Nick tossed everything on the grill and brought it out for their buffet style-barbecue.

Nancy cooked throughout the day, which may seem stressful to some brides.

However, Nancy described it as a “calming experience” as she was able to watch www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 49

FEATURE her new husband and guests as she was preparing the meals.

“I thought about what was simple, easy and what everyone liked,” said Nancy.

“The kabobs were so easy. It was very inexpensive, but super delicious.”

Other ways to put the DIY touch on the reception food: Host a reception potluck where guests bring a favorite dish to share. Have a pig roast or lobster/ clambake. Or, plan a more casual buffet.

Some couples even create a signature cocktail that goes along with the theme or reflect the couple’s personalities.

CAKE & DESSERTS What about the wedding cake?

First, it’s not a requirement. Everything — from invites to desserts — should reflect the couple’s desires.

For the Forciers, that mean having a candy bar — a table laid out with all sorts of candies — for guests to enjoy.

“The candy bar, we had it because, frankly, I LOVE candy,” said Emerald.

Using jars, spoons and goblets borrowed from a friend, Emerald had an assortment of seven different candies including Tootsie Rolls, Hershey Kisses, Swedish fish and Sour Patch Kids. Guests collected their own candy assortments in cups — and Emerald said that everything was gone by the end of the night.

However, it wasn’t the only dessert at the fete. Emerald’s bridesmaid Jillian Sarnaki Wood, owner of the by-order bakery caterer Sweet Willamina, made a lemon blueberry cake.

Katherine and Jack wanted a traditional cake, but cake isn’t their favorite. So in addition to a small cake made by a friend, guests were served blueberry and strawberry-rhubarb pie.

For couples wanting to stick to a specific budget, other options such as pies and candy bars are good to consider. Professionally made wedding cakes can be pricey. According to the wedding website, The Knot, depending on the flavor and the icing on the cake, a wedding cake can cost between $1.50 and $12 per slice. A local cake decorator said that $2.50 per slice is pretty typical. Another decorator in town said that a simple twotiered cake can be around $165 dollars while a 4 to 5 tier cake can cost up to $500.

PARTY FAVORS When Aaron was a boy, he remembers his parents making needhams for his grandparents. They loved the treat. So, five 50 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

years ago, he started making them for his grandparents as Christmas gifts. When it came time to plan the reception, he and Bob decided to give their guests the unique Maine treat as well as honor the memory of grandparents who passed away earlier that year.

However, making the batch of 200 needhams for all their guests proved difficult due to the hot July weather. To prevent them from melting, the couple dried and cooled off the needhams with fans and an air conditioner unit they installed specifically this project. They then wrapped the dessert and put their wedding logo on top of the packaging.

“There really aren’t any great needhams in stores anymore so it’s a Maine treat that my grandparents and other family members seemed to really appreciate,” said Aaron.

“My secrets are to use extra vanilla, high quality dark chocolate — and real Maine potatoes, of course.”

For her guests, Emerald bought wooden Maine-shaped ornaments from a craft website. She painted the ornaments blue and drew a heart at Winterport, the town in which her wedding took place. The ornaments also told each guest which table they were sitting at.

RECEPTION GAMES Wedding websites will fill your head with ideas of first dance songs and necessary professional photo shots, but for Bob and Aaron, having a memorable and fun experience was paramount.

“We just wanted people to walk away and say they didn’t expect that to happen,” Bob said.

Enter reception games. Aaron and Bob’s guests played games during the reception including “dirty” Mad Libs and “Pass the Pickle.”

A huge fan of Mad Libs, Bob really wanted to incorporate the word game into the reception. Each table took turns submitting words to create a Mad Lib based on the story of how the couple met. Some inappropriate answers were required and they got words they were not expecting from some tables. A hilarious story was created by the end.

“Pass the Pickle” is version of the classic game hot potato. Each table was given a cucumber to pass around. Whoever had the “pickle” at the end could give it to someone else or keep it and take the centerpiece home.

Aaron made 200 needhams for guests to take home.

KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

Jack and Katherine opted for a smaller cake and added pie to the dessert list.

FIDELIO PHOTOGRAPHY

Emerald and Kurt hand-painted ornaments as wedding favors.

PHONG DANG PHOTOGRAPHY

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FEATURE Kurt and Emerald Forcier.

Katherine and Jack Mullikin.

PHONG DANG PHOTOGRAPHY

FIDELIO PHOTOGRAPHY

Bob Kennedy and Aaron Skilling.

KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

DIY CONSTRUCTION One of the “biggest projects” Aaron and Bob did was the fence and vanity sink they created for their portable toilets. In order to make them presentable, Bob and Aaron put together barn siding and made a barrier concealing them. They stained it a solid color and had strings of photos and gingham triangles, a mirror, twinkle lights, plants and Aaron’s grandmother’s antique lamp around the structure. They bought a vanity off of Craigslist and bought a faucet at Wayfair. Aaron’s father ran an underground hose from the house to make the outdoor sink functional.

Emerald and Kurt fashioned their own dance floor out of plywood from Home Depot and created a parking lot in the yard using stakes and spray paint. When the tent was being set up, Emerald was on a ladder hanging up tulle and twinkle lights in what was a “big geometrical and engineering challenge.”

DESIGN YOUR WEDDING FOR YOU Emerald suggests that newly engaged couples go through check lists on wedding websites and make a list of things that matter and don’t. It also helps prioritize all the different elements in the wedding.

But for Emerald, one of the most important things one can do when planning their wedding is to use the help of the loved ones who are offering it. For her, it was the support from the Winterport community, the people who she grew up with, that helped make the day so special.

“The whole town came together and that’s what made it so fun.”

Although Aaron did the arrangements for the ceremony, Bob’s sister Jami created the floral arrangements for the reception and others pitched in to help set up before the guests arrived. Aaron and Bob’s officiant Michele acted as the day-of reception coordinator, made sure all the vendors arrived, the tables were set up and everything was in place.

It was the support from these people and many others that made everyone’s DIY dream wedding truly possible.

“We couldn’t have done it without the help from family and friends,” said Aaron.

52 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Aaron and Bob created an outdoor restroom for guests.

KIM CHAPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

Nancy and Nicholas Newell.

SCOTT THOMAS

Meet THE COUPLES AARON SKILLING AND BOB KENNEDY HOMETOWN: Portland ENGAGED: November 9, 2016 MARRIED: Ceremony held on January 14, 2017 with a reception on July 29, 2017

LOCATION: Ceremony was at their home in Portland. Reception was in Aaron’s parents’ backyard in Gray.

THEME: Rustic backyard barbecue OFFICIANT: Michele Dwyer, best friend of the grooms.

—Bob

EMERALD AND KURT FORCIER

LOCATION: Emerald’s parents house in Winterport on the Penobscot Bay.

HOMETOWN: Bangor

THEME: Outdoor Maine

ENGAGED: July 4, 2017

OFFICIANTS: Emerald’s father, a lawyer, and Kurt’s father, a Unitarian minister.

MARRIED: October 7, 2017

NANCY AND NICHOLAS NEWELL HOMETOWN: Bangor ENGAGED: December 2016 MARRIED: May 21, 2017

WHY DIY: “We both like being creative in different ways. We have been to a number of weddings, cookie cutter weddings, and we wanted to be unique … We wanted it to be fun and reflect who we are as people.”

LOCATION: Ceremony was at the Lucerne Inn in Dedham.

Reception was at their Bangor home.

THEME: Backyard barbecue OFFICIANT: John Bunker, friend of the bride

KATHERINE AND JACK MULLIKIN

LOCATION: Maine Audubon in Falmouth

HOMETOWN: Portland

THEME: Maine garden

ENGAGED: April 2015

OFFICIANT: Nico Tarquinio, college friend of the bride and groom

MARRIED: August 6, 2016

WHY DIY: “When you do it yourself, you pick out the things that matter to you and put your money towards what matters …

We wanted [the guests] to enjoy the beauty of the home where I grew up.”

—Emerald WHY DIY: “We just wanted it to be laid back and easy going. I just wanted it to be ‘what happens happens’ ... Short, sweet and simple.”

—Nancy

WHY DIY: “We did DIY because we could add any personal touches, and we could create something meaningful.”

—Katherine www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 53

ENGAGEMENT RING

Buyer's Guide The perfect engagement requires the perfect ring.

Quality Jewelers offers these tips for choosing the perfect diamond.

SPONSORED BY

WHILE COUPLES REMEMBER the sentiments and the style of their engagements forever, the engagement ring serves as the lasting symbol of that momentous occasion. Choosing the right engagement ring is complicated. Such a decision involves knowing what a future spouse desires in a ring and balancing those desires with budget.

Shopping for an engagement ring can be both nerve-wracking and exciting. But there are ways to make the process go as smoothly as possible.  LISTEN CAREFULLY ANYTIME JEWELRY IS DISCUSSED. Getting an idea of which style of jewelry the love of your life prefers requires keeping your eyes and ears open anytime jewelry is mentioned. Subtle hints may be dropped and pages to magazines may be folded back to provide a nudge in the right direction. It’s also perfectly fine to ask for your future spouse’s input, particularly if you’ve already spoken about marriage and know that an engagement is on the horizon.  HAVE A GOOD IDEA ON THE SHAPE OF THE STONE. All gemstones need to be cut in particular ways so that they reflect light and sparkle. Stones are also cut in specific shapes that provide the overall form of the stone. These include round, princess, emerald, oval, marquise, and pear, among others. Many people have distinct preferences when it comes to the shape of the ring. Keep in mind that some shapes are more common than others and some may be more expensive as well.  KNOW ALL THE SPECS. Buying an engagement ring means being armed with a lot of knowledge. In addition to shape, there are the four Cs to consider. These refer to the stone’s cut, carat, clarity, and color, and will determine the financial value of the gemstone. Take some time to learn about each of the four Cs so you can make a more informed decision when visiting the jeweler.

QUALITYJEWELERS.COM 25 Washington St., Bangor 207-990-1199 NEXT TO DAMON’S BEVERAGE

54 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

 SHOP AROUND. Not all jewelers are the same, and you want to find one with whom you feel comfortable and believe you will get the best value for your money. The jewelers at Quality Jewelers are more than happy to answer your questions and help you find that perfect ring. Owner Sonny LeClair also takes great pride in the custom pieces he does, so if you don’t see what you want, just ask and he will make it for you.

Paid Advertisement for Quality Jewelers.

PHOTOS: ©CLOWNBUSINESS, ©SELENSERGEN, ©MICHAEL BURRELL/ADOBE STOCK

Ready to propose?

IN LOVE WITH THE

THE BASICS OF SHOPPING FOR

Shape of You WEDDING RINGS 

ROUND CUT The round brilliant cut diamond is the most popular shape of diamond.



PRINCESS CUT The second most popular cut shape, and exceptionally brilliant.



MARQUISE CUT This shape maximizes carat weight by emphasizing the size of the diamond.



RADIANT CUT Trimmed corners combine the lines of an emerald cut with the brilliance of a round cut.



EMERALD CUT This cut showcases the diamond’s original clarity beautifully.

Engagement ring purchases are usually a solo endeavor, with the groom having an idea of the ring style and color his bride-to-be prefers. But couples usually shop for their wedding ring sets together, and such excursions can be special and meaningful.

PLAN AHEAD As couples prepare to shop for rings, it can help for each person to list the attributes he or she would like in a ring. This should include the type of metal, color, width, and even cost. Couples may find they have different preferences, and this is perfectly fine, as wedding rings do not have to match.

Couples can make some early choices even before they visit jewelry stores.

Narrow down your options so the experience will not be overwhelming.

When the time comes to shop, give yourselves some time to browse and then choose the rings you like best.

IT’S A MATCH A wedding band should complement the engagement ring but not be a perfect match. An ornate engagement ring might look better with a simple band, and vice-versa. Similarly cut gemstones also can complement an engagement ring. If the bride chooses to wear both her engagement ring and wedding band together on the same finger, she should choose a band that will accommodate the curves of uniquely shaped engagement rings.

FIT TO YOUR LIFESTYLE Lifestyle and daily routine should be considered at all times. These rings will be worn daily, and no one wants to fret about a ring being too delicate to stand up to everyday wear and tear. Also, think longterm. Trendy rings can be fun, but will they still seem like such a good idea when you are celebrating your 20th wedding anniversary?

WHEN TO SHOP Shopping should take place when hands aren't too hot or cold. This will allow the best size so the bands fit comfortably and will have enough wiggle room should fingers swell or shrink a little bit.

www.bangormetro.com BANGOR METRO / 55

QUEBEC CITY

PHOTO: ALBERTPEGO/THINKSTOCK

GET OUT

56 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Visit QUEBEC CITY There is really no wrong time of year to visit Quebec City. BY JULIA BAYLY

JUST A FOUR-AND-A-HALF hour drive north from Bangor, Canada’s oldest city has winter in its DNA and while the days may be short, they are long on fun, food and festivals.

Hugging the cliffs above the St. Lawrence Seaway, Quebec City is one of North America’s only walled cities and a UNESCO World Heritage City. It pays homage to winter with a distinctly European flair from the French-styled architecture down to the centuries-old cobblestone streets.

And, oh, how they love to party in those streets.

Cold, winter-like conditions come early in Old Quebec, with snow a real possibility in November and December.

But the real kick-off to winter is the annual Carnaval de Quebec.

Just say “Carnaval” in Quebec and they know what you’re talking about. It’s the celebration leading up to Mardi Gras (aka Fat Tuesday).

This year Carnaval runs Jan. 27 to Feb. 11 and includes parades, toboggan runs, snow sculptures, races on land and water, concerts, food and all the Quebecois joie de vivre a person can handle.

Travel Tip

The Fairmont Chateau Frontenac in winter.

GETTING THERE It’s about four and half hours driving from Bangor to Quebec City via US 201 North, crossing into Quebec at the Jackman United States-Canada port of entry — remember your passport — and then taking Autoroute 73 to the south shore of the St. Lawrence River.

From there, cross into the city on one of two bridges or, for a more scenic and direct route into the Old City, continue east to Levis and hop on the ferry. The Quebec-Levis ferry offers amazing views of Old Quebec and the city skyline. The crossing takes around 15 minutes and ferries leave every half hour all year.

GET OUT

QUEBEC CITY

Streets in Old Quebec City come alive with color during the winter months.

Overseeing this three-week festival is the event’s official mascot Bonhomme Carnaval, a sort of mashup between a snowman and a French voyageur.

Visitors can even join Bonhomme Carnaval in the traditional “snow bath” where brave souls wearing only bathing suits and snowboots hold a giant snowball fight and roll around in the snow. Something for everybody’s ice-bucket list.

If you need any more convincing that Quebecers love to get outside and play regardless of the season, check out the annual ice canoe race in which teams make multiple crossings over the partially frozen St. Lawrence River from Quebec City to Levis, often jumping out of the large wooden boats to portage them over ice floes.

Snowshoe and cross country ski races on the Plains of Abraham — the site of the 1759 battle between the British and the French, dog sled races down the streets, ice sculptures and parades are all packed into the three-week Carnaval.

Winter, of course, lasts a lot longer than three weeks, and while things quiet down a bit after Carnaval, there is still plenty to do in Old Quebec.

The old city is very walkable with countless cafes, shops and museums along the way in which to warm up and take in all manner of culture. It’s also somewhat magical in the winter with snow-covered rooftops, twinkling lights and crisp air.

In fact, on foot is probably the best way to experience the city as the narrow streets are often teaming with tourists and finding a parking place can be a real challenge.

Once your car is parked, you really don’t need to drive anywhere else in the old city until you are done for the day.

Rising high above all of this and serving as the perfect navigating landmark is the iconic Fairmont Le Chateau Frontenac which turns 125-years-old in 2018.

Travel Tip

MONEY MATTERS Credit cards are accepted virtually everywhere in Old Quebec, but having a bit of Canadian cash on hand is not a bad idea. ATMs are scattered throughout the city. Speaking of Canadian cash, the current strength of the US dollar against its Canadian counterpart makes heading north a bit of a bargain.

58 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

Luxurious and pricey — winter rates start at $237/night and go up to $409/night — the hotel was originally built as a lodging for Canadian-Pacific Rail passengers wanting to stopover in Quebec for a night or two.

Since then it has hosted heads of state, royalty, celebrities and tourists from around the world.

With its old world style and vibe, views of the St. Lawrence and general wowfactor, for the average tourist it’s a once and lifetime experience to say you’ve stayed at “The Chateau,” and frankly, it’s worth it.

Running in front of The Chateau is the

popular wooden boardwalk perfect for a leisurely stroll anytime of the year. Just be sure to bundle up in winter as the winds off the St. Lawrence can be strong and frigid.

At the western edge of the boardwalk is a man-made toboggan run which is worth the $3 it costs to drag a wooden toboggan up the steep incline and then hang on for dear life as you shoot down the ramp toward The Chateau.

From the boardwalk a series of stairways leads down The Quartier Petit Champlain, considered one of the most beautiful sites in the city.

It’s also one of the oldest commercial streets in North America and really looks its best in winter when shopkeepers and residents put up thousands of colorful lights and decorations.

Here the streets are even narrower than the upper portion of the Old City and paved with rough cobblestones that can make driving or walking a tricky affair — especially when snow-covered or icy. It’s advisable to use caution while doing either.

But it’s so worth it.

In the heart of Petit Champlain is a large, open square bordered by cafes, shops,

Winter visitors to Quebec City snap a quick photo as they prepare to ride toboggans down a manmade hill with the Fairmont Chateau Frontenac as a backdrop.

Dogs are welcome inside to warm up on a winter day at La Maison Smith where humans enjoy steaming hot chocolate, maple lattes and a variety of fresh baked goods.​

Travel Tip

BRRRRRR! There’s no way around it, Quebec City in winter is cold.

Bundle up if you are walking around so cold hands and feet don’t ruin a perfect day.

WHERE TO EAT AND DRINK The only challenge to finding a place to eat in Old Quebec is narrowing down your options — of which there are hundreds.

Your best bet is to stroll along the streets and check out the menus posted in the windows of the restaurants and let your taste buds lead the way.

One of the best meals I’ve had in the city was at Aux Anciens Canadiens located in the city’s oldest house at 34 rue Saint-Louis. The menu is basically meat.

With a side of meat and a bit more meat

on top of that — all prepared according to traditional Quebecois recipes. I had — and recommend — the three tenderloins of grilled venison, elk and bison in a cognac pepper sauce. Your server will be more than happy to suggest the perfect wine as an accompaniment.

For a lighter plate, walk down to Le Petit Champlain to La Maison Smith at 23 Notre Dame Street for a maple latte with some quiche or sandwich. Not only is it my favorite place for a coffee, it’s also dog-friendly with well behaved pooches

welcome inside on cold or rainy days or on the patio during the warmer months.

If you just can’t decide on what sounds good, head over to Marché du Vieux Port, Quebec City’s year round farmers’ market at 160 Saint-André Quai. Featuring some of the best of the province’s farm and artisanal food items, you can load up on cheese, breads, wines and other products while talking to the folks who grow and make them. Most vendors are happy to share samples, so you can literally graze your way through the place.

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GET OUT

QUEBEC CITY

(Above) Maple syrup is boiled down to a thick consistency and poured over fresh snow to create maple taffy.

(This photo) Crepes are freshly made at the Marche du Vieux Port year round farmer's market in Quebec City.

USEFUL WEBSITES Quebec City Tourism: www.quebecregion.com/en La Maison Smith: www.lamaisonsmith.com Aux Anciens Canadiens: www.auxancienscanadiens.qc.ca/en/index.htm Marche du Vieux Port: www.marchevieuxport.com Quebec-Levis ferry: www.traversiers.com Hotel Chateau Bellevue: www.hotelvieux-quebec.com Hotel Manoir Victoria: www.manoir-victoria.com Fairmont Chateau Frontenac: www.fairmont.com/frontenac-quebec

60 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

historical sites, street performers and galleries.

There is perhaps no better place in the entire city to take a break than at one of the small cafes on that square with a steaming cup of coffee or hot chocolate and a slice of quiche, hunk of cheese with bread or fresh baked pastry.

Quebec’s food and wine scene has exploded over the past several years.

Nearby Iles de Orleans has several world class wineries and the province’s Eastern Townships — bordering western Maine — are also exporting some impressive vintages.

Quebec’s chefs are using locally sourced produce, meats and seafood to create traditional foods like meat pies, stews and soups as well as putting their own modern spin on these classic creations.

Bottom line when it comes to eating out in Old Quebec City? If the restaurant or cafe is owned and operated by a local chef, you really can’t go wrong.

The choice often comes down to how much you want to spend on breakfast, lunch, dinner or a snack.

Do you want to spring for a multi-course gourmet meal that can run into the hundreds of dollars or keep it low key but still amazing with a creation from a small creperie? Or maybe you have a hankering for something sweet to take off the edge.

Stop at The Chateau where vendors in historical Quebecois dress serve maple syrup turned into taffy on the snow.

Either way, go ahead and indulge — remember, you’re doing a lot of walking. Sightseeing is a great way to work up an appetite.

One final observation before you pack up and head north: Yes, Quebec prides itself on its French heritage and language. But fear not, it also relies heavily on the tourism industry and thus most everyone you will meet is multilingual and speaks English.

Quebecers are proud of all they have to offer and, regardless of the season, the door is always open.

Travel Tip

WHERE TO STAY There are many lodging options in the Old City from the landmark Fairmont Chateau Frontenac [1 rue des Carrières] to more modest inns or beds and breakfast scattered around within the walls. Many have onsite parking so you can check in, leave your car and forget about it during your stay. Personal favorites are Hotel Manoir Victoria [44, Côte du Palais] and Hotel Chateau Bellevue [16 rue de la Porte].

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OUTSIDE

WOODS & WATERS

SUN VENUS

MERCURY EARTH MARS

JUPITER SATURN

URANUS

Mapping the

PLANETS Tracking the planets from Houlton to Presque Isle.

STORY & PHOTO BY BOB DUCHESNE

62 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

VENUS

PLUTO

ERIS & CERES

IT’S A PRETTY DRIVE to Presque Isle, through the rolling hills, expansive vistas, and potato fields of Aroostook County. But somehow, miles in The County seem longer than miles elsewhere in Maine. It helps to make a game out of it. Watch the planets fly by, and feel the miles whiz by.

Dr. Kevin McCartney is a geology professor at the University of Maine at Presque Isle. He directs the Northern Maine Museum of Science on campus. Around the turn of this century, he had the idea to build a scale model of the solar system along Route 1 in Aroostook County. It would start with Pluto at the visitor center in Houlton, and end at the sun, which is located inside the Museum of Science in Folsom Hall.

Three years later, it was done, accomplished on a shoestring budget using volunteer labor and spare parts. (Mercury is an old billiards ball.) Pluto hangs on the wall of the visitor center. The other eight planets are mounted on poles along the route.

The Earth is 93,000,000 miles from the sun. That distance is called an astronomical unit. In the scale model, one astronomical unit in space is equal to one mile on Earth. Thus, the model of Earth is located one mile from the model of the sun, and all the other planets are spaced out and sized accordingly.

This is where it gets interesting. Some planets are huge, others not so much. It’s easy to spot Jupiter and Saturn out the window of a speeding car. But the model of Mercury is a mere two inches in diameter.

Mars is under three inches. Even with a map of the locations, they can be hard to spot.

This, of course, makes it a fun game for kids.

It combines science with a scavenger hunt.

This is where it gets even more interesting. A lot has happened since the models were erected. Science has rearranged our thinking. The solar system extends out as far as the sun’s gravitational hold on objects. Astronomers have discovered objects larger than Pluto, far beyond Pluto.

That forced scientists to reconsider the definition of what a planet is. In 2006, Pluto was downgraded to dwarf planet status.

A dwarf planet is big enough that its own gravity has collapsed its mass into a round shape, but not so big that its gravity has pulled surrounding matter into itself.

Eris is another dwarf planet that orbits the sun much farther away than Pluto, and it has now been incorporated into the solar

system model. The tiny model is smaller than a golf ball, and stands on a pole all the way down in Washington County, in Topsfield. If the scale model was designed to teach travelers about the relative distance of objects in our solar system, this one sure does the trick.

Another dwarf planet was also added to the model. Ceres is a planet-like object that occupies an orbit between Mars and Jupiter.

Like Eris, the scale model is tiny. It would be easy to drive right by, and never notice.

Another problem with Pluto: its orbit is weird. Its orbit is an elongated oval, revolving at an odd angle around the sun. While the model located in the visitor center depicts its average historical distance from the sun, Pluto is actually much closer to the sun at present — and due to the slowness of its orbit, it will remain much closer for the rest of our lifetimes.

Professor McCartney decided we needed a second Pluto, located significantly closer to Presque Isle than the original Pluto, at a point that better describes its current distance from the sun. So, yes, there are

now two Plutos in the model solar system.

Who knew driving to Presque Isle could get so complicated?

All of these celestial bodies are named after figures in Roman mythology, except for Earth, which is of older linguistic origin — meaning, basically, earth. Learning about the gods is almost as much fun as trying to find the planets, especially when you throw in their moons. Only Mercury and Venus have no moons. The larger moons of the remaining planets are also mounted on posts, in the relative positions they would occupy in their orbits. Some moons are larger than the smaller planets.

Jupiter’s got some big ones. Even Earth’s moon is larger than Pluto.

Someday celestial tourists may visit these worlds. Avoid the restaurant on the moon.

Great food, but no atmosphere.

BOB DUCHESNE is a local radio personality, Maine guide, and columnist. He lives on Pushaw Lake with his wife, Sandi.

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You can

GO HOME

AGAIN When your childhood finds the repeat button.

BY EMILY MORRISON

IF SOMEONE TOLD ME when I became a mother that I would become a child again, I wouldn’t have believed them. First, it sounds too corny to be true, and second, children don’t do manual labor. As a kid, the most work I did involved pretending to dust while watching “Saved by the Bell” and balling up a month’s worth of dirty laundry under my bed. I was Beaver Cleaver with a bad perm and a collection of Harlequins instead of comic books.

Not long ago I came back from dropping my 14-year-old off at her friend’s house, I opened the front door to hear classical music playing. Two chairs were missing from the living room, my other two kids were nowhere in sight and the door to my bedroom was ajar. My mom radar (the sixth sense women develop over time and multiple children) started to ping. I tiptoed through the house as silently as my nine-year-old son preparing to steal my cellphone from under my pillow every morning.

Creeping closer to the bedroom I heard Jack say, “Can you do the other calf?

That’s amazing!”

The alarm bells in my head become one constant, “Pingggggg!”

Through the crack in the door, I see Jack laying face down on a makeshift cot. A candle flickers on the floor, a laptop playing Mozart sits on the bed and a half-eaten plate of macn-cheese lays in front of his face while my 12-year-old daughter administers a deep tissue massage to his left calf.

Instantly, my mind travels three decades back, and I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

In the 80s, when hair was big and the world was small, I spent my childhood listening to my walkman and watching “American Bandstand” with my sister. She’s only 16 months older, but those months felt like light years. Mary was another mother, one with sharp nails and crablike pinchers. Whenever we weren’t creating dance routines in the living room (I suspect we’d watched too much “Dirty Dancing”) we palled around with our cousins, Jen and Willie, who lived four houses up from us.

Sometimes, despite all our local environs had to offer, we were bored stiff. When ennui threatened to overtake us, Mary and Jen took charge of all anti-boredom activities: tag, hide-n-seek and chase. A runner I was not, so eventually I’d pant out, “How ’bout we change to everyone’s favorite game — house!” Looking back, I don’t know why pretending to be grown-up was such a crowd pleaser. Being responsible every day is no fun at all.

Ten minutes into make-believe adulthood, our house family would reach the same conclusion, so we’d switch to dentist. Taking kitchen utensils from Mom’s silverware drawer, Mary would “drill” into our mouths. Sometimes Mary would give us the pretend shot before she took something sharp to our teeth. Other times she’d say, “You may experience a little discomfort,” before Willie and I naively opened wide.

When that cozy scene ended in tears, Mom suggested a change of locale: the attic, basement or bedroom (all places out of earshot now that I think about it). In the attic we’d play office; in the cellar we’d play hotel, and in our bedroom we’d play massage potion (the holy grail of all make believe games). What could be better than concocting different potions and lotions to pour on someone’s back while the kitchen timer ticked off the minutes of relaxation by their ear?

If we were lucky, sometimes the masseuse would forget to set the timer, and we’d get an extra long turn. I still remember the list of ingredients available: shampoo, baby powder or hand lotion.

Life fast-forwards again and I hear Meg say, “Four more minutes, and it’s my turn!” as she slathers more goop on her brother’s calf.

“Okay. When it’s your turn, I’m going to get you a special treat!” Jack says.

The cell phone timer goes off. He gets up, comes back in carrying a plate of chocolate covered raspberries and resets the Mozart Medley before he begins karate chopping his sister in the back.

I am home again.

EMILY MORRISON is a high school English teacher, freelance writer and editor from coastal Maine. She is living happily-ever-after with her handsome husband, three beautiful children and two beloved dogs. And a cat.

64 / BANGOR METRO January 2018

PHOTO: JUPITERIMAGES/THINKSTOCK

THE VIEW FROM HERE