Bayou Beat News - May 2022

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May 2022

Volume 1, Issue 2

MOTHER’S DAY DEATH NOR DECADES OF INCARCERATION COULD STOP A MOTHER’S LOVE

INSIDE THIS EDITION SCAN ME TO SUBSCRIBE

“BUN B DOES IT AGAIN!”

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5 BEST MOTHER’S DAY GIFTS TO SHOWER YOUR MOM WITH APPRECIATION

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2 | MAY 2022

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EDITOR’S CORNER S

o, we made it to Edition 2, and as they say, “Look at God!” We are so excited from the overwhelming response of positivity for our inaugural print edition of Bayou Beat News and we are looking forward to sharing so much more of our funky and unique, yet informative, style. Covering the Southern Coast, including Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Georgia, Florida, the Carolinas and more, we are gathering news from each region and invite you to send us your story ideas.

Happy reading, Nakia Cooper Editor-in-Chief

LET’S CONNECT!

Marketing and Development Manager Dana Patterson Distribution Manager Joseph “Shorty” Detiege Senior Writer N.C. Greene Writer Nevaeh Richardson Social Media Andrea Kotova Graphics Nathaniel Greene Photography Natalie Greene Live Correspondent Ciara Ross @Iamciaraross

Entertainment Coordinator Cornel Grant (Music Monopoly) Email: info@bayoubeatnews.com Advertisement: info@bayoubeatnews.com Subject line: ADS

Birthday Queens The Elite Ladies of Expression hosted a special “throwback” party with proceeds benefiting the Junior Elite Golfers of the organization. (Pictured left to right) Mrs. Dorrise Jenkins, Jackie Matthews and Martha Marie Preston.

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Editor-in-Chief Nakia Cooper

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Remembering “Big T”

On May 7, 2018, we lost our beloved Terence “Big T” Prejean, everyone’s favorite hook man known best for the sauce he brought to Lil Troy’s “Wanna Be a Baller.” Keep resting, King. Gone, but never forgotten.”

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DEATH NOR DECADES OF INCARCERATION COULD STOP A MOTHER’S LOVE By: Nakia L. Cooper

“She just got scared and wouldn’t let him bring her back and by the time the white surfers were trying to get back to her, she went under and was lost,” said Booker Morris, who was 18 years old at the time.

“That was one of the most devastating days I can remember, and my friend Lane was never the same again.”

Neither was her family. Well actually, MY family.

For many years, I struggled to understand why my beloved grandmother, “Mam-maw” was “different,” often standoffish to most, and my Uncle Michael was “always going to jail.”

I later came to realize that it was because they both had a broken heart.

They never recovered from the death of their dearest Sandra Yvette, affectionately known as “Donut,” because of her sweet disposition and deep chocolate skin.

On June 18, 1972, Donut left her home in the Riceville community in southwest Houston and headed to Surfside Beach on Galveston Island for a school class field trip.

She and two other girls were enjoying the ocean when they accidentally drifted off farther than expected.

Morris explained there was a storm approaching and the water was choppy that day.

“The tide comes in and the undertow comes in and sucks you back out, and you wind up deeper than where you originally were,” he explained.

Morris, Lane (last name withheld) and several others were able to get the two other girls to safety, but sadly, Donut drowned.

According to the accident report, Lane was overcome by a current and also had to be rescued. He barely made it to the shore alive and was transported to the hospital to be treated for shock.

The Freeport and Galveston Coast Guard stations were contacted, and a helicopter was sent out, but they eventually had to abandon the search and her body was never recovered.

The accident report described the victim as a 15-year-old “colored” female, wearing cut off blue jean shorts and a backless red halter top. When she left home wearing that, it was the last time her mother and brother ever saw her. As stated in the re-

port, o n e of the o t h e r students c a l l e d Houston to tell the victim’s mother about the tragedy.

My devastated family had to hold Donut’s funeral at the beach and throw flowers into the water.

The eldest sibling, my mother, was 8 months pregnant with my big sister at the time. She still mourns to this day.

My Uncle Michael, while loving, became a fierce protector of his family, and his quick temper eventually led to him being incarcerated for nearly 30 of his 64 years on this Earth, being sentenced to his first stint in prison when he was only 17.

And in a twist of ironic six degrees of separation, Morris, the

young man who was among those desperately trying to save our Donut, is now the Deputy District Director for the 18th District of Texas - Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee’s Office. (While writing this article and reading the report, I noticed his name was familiar and I actually had his contact information. I reached out immediately and after confirming it was him, he shared his haunting memories of that day.)

My beloved

Mamm a w mourned her daughter’s death until she passed away 15 years ago.

After her death, I found other carefully preserved documents that she had stored. Along with the accident report, my grandmother saved all of her kids’ report cards, girl scout and boy scout photos, and other precious mementos.

But nothing was more powerful than coming across the dozens of photos Mam-maw and Uncle Michael had taken over the decades while he was incarcerated. There they were, organized and stacked in perfect time lapse; he in his “prison whites” and her holding the standard single rose the in-

mates could present to their loved ones.

She visited him often, but it was clear to see that their “special day,” was Mother’s Day. In those photos, I could see their hearts and souls. I could see their true love.

The photos start off when Uncle Michael went to prison as a teen in the 1970’s, you see my Mam-maw in her bell bottom jeans and her funky vests, smooth skin and puffy hair.

And as the photos continue on, you see Mam-maw begin to age, right up to the time that she was actually in her 70s, with her cute “old lady” wigs and church dresses.

Her skin was wrinkled, and her age was showing, but another thing transcended through those Polaroid snapshots: her undeniable and unstoppable love and dedication to her child. Sadly, Michael was incarcerated when Mam-maw left this Earth and their annual Mother’s Day visits ended.

Michael was recently released from prison and is working on healing from the tragedy.

Counseling has helped him realize that the pain of losing his sister, and watching his mother mourn terribly, led to him “acting out” as a young man. Some people may need to understand their “why” in order to change their lives for the better.

And to all the mothers out there, from those who have lost children to those who are struggling to raise them, to those who are basking in the joy of not ever having any issues, etc. – cherish those memories – and make EVERY day with them your SPECIAL DAY.

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ON THE BEAT BUSINESS

SPORTS

COMMUNITY

‘TRILLIONAIRE’: BUN B, 8TH WONDER BREWERY CREATE HEMP-DERIVED DRINK By: BB Staff Bun B does it again! The original “Trill OG” is continuing to soar as he and 8th Wonder Brewery have just partnered for a refreshing surprise: Trillionaire, a brand new non-alcoholic, hemp-derived herbal seltzer in the brewery’s groundbreaking Wonder Water Herbal Seltzer line.

Trillionaire is a 10mg Delta-8 THC Watermelon Herbal Seltzer that offers a new version of the relaxing, delicious experience fans of Wonder Water Herbal Seltzers have come to expect.

Trillionaire boasts zero calories and a sweet, smooth watermelon finish. It is a salute to the legendary Trill OG Bun B, and the latest addition to 8th Wonder’s growing collection of Houston-made classics.

Since launching in 2013, 8th Wonder Brewery has become synonymous with original brews informed by place, innovation, and tradition. The sixth brewery to open in Houston, 8th Wonder helped cultivate the city’s then-burgeoning local craft beer scene that has since grown to include more than 50 breweries. 8th Wonder Brewery now offers 8 year-round brews, plus a rotating list of seasonal favorites and special releases in addition to the new herbal seltzers. In 2018, 8th Wonder founded its distillery, which features 8x-distilled vodka, hop-infused gin, silver rum, and a hand-selected whiskey.

PLEASE NOTE: Trillionaire is now available for purchase at the brewery and select retailers. Consumers of Wonder Water Herbal Seltzers must be at least 21 years old. Consumption of either beverage may result in a positive initial drug screening for THC. SCAN ME TO SUBSCRIBE

ROCKETS JALEN GREEN NAMED TWICE AS WESTERN CONFERENCE ‘ROOKIE OF THE MONTH’ By: BB Staff The NBA has announced that Rockets guard Jalen Green has been named Western Conference Rookie of the Month for March and April. He is the first Rocket to have earned Rookie of the Month honors since Luis Scola in February of 2008 and the sixth different player in franchise history, joining Ralph Sampson, Hakeem Olajuwon, Steve Francis, Yao Ming, and Scola.

In March, Green became the youngest player to have recorded at least 350 points and 50 3-pointers made in a single month while shooting 48.0% or better from the floor and 39.0% or better from 3-point range. Green averaged 28.6 points on 49.5% shooting in five games played in April, including a career-high 41 points in the season finale vs. Atlanta on April 10.

Green turned 20 years old on Feb. 9.

He finished the season as the eighth rookie 20 or younger in NBA history to have at least 1,157 points, 226 rebounds and 176 assists through the first 67 games played of a career.

MURAL UNVEILED IN HOUSTON HONORING SUPREME COURT JUSTICE KETANJI BROWN JACKSON By: BB Staff Harris County Commissioner Rodney Ellis joined Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee, Congressman Al Green and other community leaders on April 20 to unveil an awe-inspiring mural of Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson.

The mural was created to honor Judge Jackson’s historic confirmation as the first Black woman to the Supreme Court.

The 17- by 36-foot mural, painted by Houston artist Anat Ronen, is on Precinct One’s Youth Education Town (YET) building at Finnigan Park in a neighborhood noted for other nationally recognized African Americans, including Barbara Jordan and Mickey Leland, both of whom served in Congress.

“As a big advocate of public art, I’m extremely proud that this mural honors Justice Jackson’s ascent to the highest court in the land,” Commissioner Ellis said. “Justice Jackson carries with her the legacy of brave and bold Black women – including Congresswoman Barbara Jordan – who persevered in the face of bigotry, oppression and sexism to forge the path we walk today.”

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BAYOU HEAT What’s hot along the bayou? “Bayou Heat” features the best restaurants, clubs, events and people in the South. Each edition, we will highlight something new and special YOU need to know about. Check out our latest happenings.

‘Abosstress’ Local Artist

talks new single, working with platinum producer

By: Alexandria Green-Jones

A certified boss and songstress are what inspired the moniker behind Houston’s newest female artist, “Abostress.” The talented young singer and rapper hails from South Park Houston, and uses her experiences of growing up there to fuel her trap beats and lyrical prowess.

Bayou Beat caught up with the “Top of the World” singer to learn all about her new music and latest collaborations.

BB: Tell me about your latest singles?

A: My newest release “Pop My Shit” just dropped and is available on all major streaming platforms.

My previous single “Ride with Me” has become a fan favorite.

It has the H-Town slang and the laid-back, chill vibe that is familiar to Houston music lovers. It was produced by A-Wall, who has produced for Trey Songz and other major artists.

BB: What’s the inspiration for your musical sound?

A: I am a country girl at heart.

I grew up around horses and trail riders, so that part of my personality is represented in my music. I also incorporate a lot of the original slow swangin’ and bangin’ sound that Houston is known for. I was brought up across the street from the Screwed-Up Records and Tapes Store on Cullen. I saw the tour buses drive up and became inspired and influenced by that at a very young age. I can rap about getting money and popping a** like everybody else, but I want to make music that you can ride, chill and smoke to, like back in the day. That’s who I am and what I want my music to reflect.

BB: Can we expect an album anytime soon?

A: The goal is to get an 8-song EP out this year, hopefully by the spring. I’m focused on finishing all of the videos before putting out the complete EP. This year, I’ve been focused on getting my face out there be-

cause last year was about laying the foundation. Now that we have the streets talking, we can give them the EP and then we will focus on the album.

BB: Are you signed to a label or working with any management team?

A: I’m strictly independent at the moment. I paid for everything myself and I even used my own cars and family vehicles in all my videos.

BB: What artists would you like to collab with?

A: That’s an easy one -- Wiz Khalifa, Lil Durk, Summer Walker, Party Next Door, Meagan Thee Stallion, and Bun B. BB: Where do you see yourself in the next 10 years?

A: I see myself as more of a businesswoman in the music industry. I do my music for fun and to give people music that gives them good vibes. I’m not trying to be Meagan or Cardi. I love them but I’m happy being an underground artist.

In the future I see myself being more like Kandi from Xscape. I want to be known for my music, but I want to be known equally as a businesswoman.

BB: What advice do you have for others who are struggling to follow their dreams?

A: My advice is to change your environment, hustle hard, stay consistent and stay prayed up.

Always remember that nothing happens overnight. I was dancing throughout college and would get off work, take care of my kid and go to school at Texas Southern University. No matter what I was doing in the streets, I stayed close to my Faith. I’m a firm believer that you must stay down for the come-up because, in the end, when all of your hard work starts to pay off, it’s what you do with the success that makes you a real “BOSS.” You can do what you gotta’ do to get the money, but respect the money and stay focused so you don’t fall off. You have to stick to the goal.

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LOCAL

HABJ IS BACK LIKE IT NEVER LEFT! By: BB staff

As signs of the pandemic begin to ease up, members of the Houston Association of Black Journalists were out in full force, networking and fellowshipping at one of H-Town’s newest hot spots, Thirteen, owned by former Houston Rockets player James Harden.

Journalists from various television news stations, radio stations, online and print publications, in addition to leaders from public relations firms, corporate communications teams, etc. came out to enjoy some much-needed “face time.”

Newsroom leaders including Isiah Carey and Jonathan Martin (FOX 26); Erica Simon (ABC 13); Jennifer Moore, Kimberly Davis, Ugochi Iloka and

Brittany Ford (KHOU 11 News); Special thanks to the amazing Rilwan Balogun (KPRC 2), Cam owners and team at Thirteen for Hill (The Cam Hill Show) and providing the meeting space.

Kris Green (Radio One) AND MORE took some extra time to mix and mingle with students from various universities, giving them advice on the journalism industry.

HABJ board members include Nakia Cooper, Brandon Walker, Joy Sewing, Erica Simon, Vicky Pink, Vanessa Wade, Shavonne Herndon, Alexis Jones, Rebecca Briscoe, Freddie Willis, Rebecca Briscoe, Tyrone Willis and Kayla Simmons.

JOIN HABJ TODAY! Fees available for professional and student members.

For more information, visit HABJ.org.

THE HOUSTON

DENTAL FESTIVAL SATURDAY, JUNE 25, 2022 11AM TO 4PM

HOSTED BY

Saniya Symone SCAN ME TO SUBSCRIBE

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LOCAL

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NEWS WITH ATTITUDE Sometimes you just have to say how you feel in an “I said what I said” kind of way, and sometimes you just have to take a break from the humdrum and sink into some HOT TOPICS. “News With Attitude” gives readers that Southern spice, with our editorials, short stories or taboo features that we are definitely not ashamed to share.

TABOO: THE BIRTH OF A UNICORN By: Llana Luv

I met a woman on Facebook a few years ago. Like most FB situations, we went from accepting friend requests, liking and replying to each other’s posts to chatting in Messenger.

Our connection seemed like we had been friends for years.

We had so much in common.

After 2 months of talking on the phone, she invited me to a party that her and her husband were having at their house.

She said there were about five other couples that were going to show up and to not bring anyone because I was her “special guest.” Excited about taking a break from working so much, I arrived to the party with a bottle of wine and a smile.

Both her and her husband both answered the door and welcomed me in. My smile immediately turned into a face of confusion because her husband was openly flirting with me in front of her. I’m not a woman who takes pride in getting the attention of another woman’s man and I didn’t want his awkward advances to cause some rivalry between me and my new friend, but I noticed that she was enjoying and encouraging his advances. So, I just laughed it off and chalked it up to “It’s their thing.”

When I walked in to the living room, there were already two of the couples there. The music was playing, hor d’oevres were being served, and the room was filled with talking and laughter as more couples began to show up. I was really enjoying myself. Everyone was so beautiful and friendly.

At one point, my glass of wine was low, so I decided to go to the kitchen to refill. I know I was a little tipsy at this point and it probably took me a little longer than usual to open the bottle but when I finally did, I took a sip and headed by to the living room with the rest of the party.

To my surprise, the talking and laughter had turned to moans and slapping sounds.

Everything immediately went into slow motion.

Do you remember how in some old movies, when a person was contemplating a choice, an angel would appear on one shoulder and a devil would appear on the other? Well, that’s exactly what happened.

One part of me said “run to the door,” but another part of me said “now you know it’s been a

long time and you need some.” As I was contemplating for a split second, my friend had changed into some lingerie and was in the hall summoning me to come to her.

“F*ck it,” I thought, then looked at that glass of wine, gulped it down, put it on the table and headed to her. She led me to their bedroom where her husband was lying on the bed awaiting my arrival. Between the slightly drunken buzz, two mouths and four hands working simultaneously, a new “Unicorn” was born.

Definitions you NOW know……..

Unicorn - a term referring to a single female in the swinging community.

Swinger - a term referring to couples who have sex with other people openly.

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REAL ESTATE

WHAT TO KNOW WHEN SELLING A HOME WITH PETS Marla Lewis is 2021-22 President of the Houston Black Real Estate Association (HBREA) If you are a pet owner, when you decide to put your house on the market, you need to do some serious house cleaning and repair work before you can command a competitive price.

You want buyers to be able to picture themselves in your home. This means giving them the space to envision living there, space that is free from too many personal things. That includes pets and their toys. So how do you go about selling your property when you have pets? Here are some general tips that may or may not apply to your particular situation.

One important thing to keep in mind is that your animal has its own needs, needs that are best discussed with your veterinarian. Talk to him or her about what you plan on doing and how it will work with your specific pet or pets. This is especially important when your pet is older and may not adjust well to change. Selling a home can be just as stressful for the pet as the home owner.

Temporarily relocating the pets may or may not be something you are willing to do, but it is easier to show-and-sell your home (and keep it clean), if your pets are away when buyers arrive. If you have a friend

or family member that you trust with Fido, it will give you the chance to eliminate all the signs of having a pet in the house and prevent the pet from causing further issues. Some folks consider the presence of a pet a turn-off when shopping for a house.

When selling a home with pets, at the very least, you should remove them from your home while showing the property. All the cute things your dog does will not help you sell your home and only serve to remind the potential buyer that pets have lived there.

Ideally, you should have your Realtor show the home while you and your pet are away. Having a pet in the house or yard can create complications for your Realtor during a showing, and puts your pet at risk of accidentally running away. There are also liability issues at stake. While your dog or cat may generally be friendly, they could potentially be hostile toward people they don’t recognize.

It may not always be possible to remove a pet from a home. In this case, your next best option is to put them in a contained space and let a buyer and their Realtor know ahead of time or buy a pet crate to house them.

Your pet may not be accustomed to this, and while you love treating your animals like one of the family, sometimes this is what it takes when selling your home.

As much as we love our pets,

they are still animals and pet damage is never attractive when selling a home. Dogs and cats will inevitably destroy something—carpets, furniture, hardwood flooring, walls, doors, turf in your yard and fencing. This damage should be repaired before showing the home. This may require some investment on your part. Regardless of repair costs, the value you will get for your house will be worth the expense.

While it is possible to get used to pet smells over time, n e w visitors to your

home will likely notice the smells right away.

This is something you want to avoid. In fact, this may be the single most important tip for selling a home with pets.

Our sense of smell has a powerful effect on our emotions, memory and perceptions of things. An initial urine odor upon entering a house is sure to stick in the buyer’s mind, and he or she will likely deduct the cost of carpet replacement immediately from an offer as a result. A strong odor is in fact one of the top reasons a buyer will pass on a home.

Have your carpet and flooring professionally cleaned, with a

By: Marla Lewis focus on removing pet odors. If the stains or odors are too bad, you may need to replace the damaged carpet.

Pick up messes in the back yard and have any missing or damaged sod replaced and any other repairs made.

You may pick up after your pet regularly or have a cat that causes very little impact to your yard. However, many home owners give their pets free reign of the yard. This is a great life for dogs and cats, but can undermine the appearance of your lawn. The yard is just as important to some buyers as the interior of the home.

You want buyers to be as unaware of your pets as possible.

If they ask the question, you must answer honestly. However, you can often avoid this topic altogether by taking necessary steps like those listed above.

In addition, put away pet toys, bedding, litter boxes and food, preferably at a location other than your home.

Some Realtors even recommend removing photos in which your pet appears and to make sure the animal does not show up in marketing materials for your home. Like other forms of home staging, removing extra pet clutter is important when selling your property.

Selling a home with pets takes work, but is worth it in the long run. You may do all of these things and still have buyers inquire about pets. Sometimes it’s impossible to hide all the evidence and sometimes they ask anyway. Even if this happens, you have still done everything necessary to return your house to its appearance before you had a pet.

For more information about Texas real estate, please visit HAR.com.

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LIFESTYLE

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5 BEST MOTHER’S DAY GIFTS TO SHOWER YOUR MOM WITH APPRECIATION

45

By: Nevaeh Richardson

Mother’s Day is a special day because it allows us to take time to focus on the very special ladies in our lives (even though we should celebrate these mother figures year-round). While flowers and chocolates are classic options, maybe you’re looking for something to switch it up this year. If that’s the case, we’ve got you covered. These activities can be combined to create the ultimate Mother’s Day experience.

Mother’s Day Happy Hour Gather all the moms and mother figures together for happy hour! While bars and restaurants are great options, you could always get creative and serve signature cocktails for each of the mothers. This is a perfect activity for the mothers who want to unwind and let loose.

Mother’s Day Craft & Sip Is your mom a creative? If so, this artthemed activity is perfect for your mother. Spend quality time together through activities such as painting, knitting, collage-making, and other types of crafts. Add some of your mother’s favorite wine and you have the perfect mother-daughter/son date.

Mother’s Day Picnic Picnics can be an amazing way to celebrate the special moms in your life. Whether at a park, the beach, or your own backyard, take advantage of the warm weather with your mother’s favorite foods, drinks, and music.

Mother’s Day Appreciation Book This gift is a guaranteed tear-jerker. This will take some research and craftiness.

You can gather family photos, drawings, letters, etc. to make a compilation of your favorite moments with mom.

Mother’s Day Special Playlist This is for the music-loving moms.

Make a special playlist of songs that express your love and appreciation for the mother figures in your life. This is a gift that expresses thoughtfulness and intimacy.

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IKEOMA’S EYE

CONFESSIONS OF A BLACK MOTHER

By: Ikeoma Divine

In lieu of having two adult children, I’ve had time to go back and reconsider how I raised them. If I could do it over again, I would have been more emotionally available. My reason for not doing so was my previous belief that it would “weaken” them if they had gotten used to being treated a certain way and I knew this society would not treat them the same way. I wanted them to have “tough skin” so that they could survive. Unfortunately, in this society, black people are not looked at with empathy and compassion. There is more public outrage when animals are being abused than when a black child playing in a playground is shot by a cop or is killed for walking to a store for candy in his own neighborhood.

My main goals were to make sure they were financially literate, had critical thinking skills,

had a strong work ethic, had social skills, knew how to cook, clean and m a i n tain their own living space. I also raised them thinking that if anything happened to me, I wanted the peace of mind that they could survive without me. Tomorrow is not promised to anybody. I thought it was selfish of me to let my kids depend on me for things they could and should be doing for themselves.

When I was in middle school, my parents would give me all of my lunch money on Monday and I would have to budget it to make sure I would eat all week. If I spent it prematurely, I would be hungry for lunch for the rest of the week. I quickly learned to budget, and this skill has helped me throughout my adult life. So, I taught my kids to be disciplined with money by initially taking them with me to the stores and discussing prices and how to look for discounts and budgeting their money. To this day, they are both frugal and at 25, my youngest bought his first home.

In order for them to be able to make responsible life decisions, it was essential that they had critical thinking skills. I used every opportunity that I could to instill this. As soon

as they were able to make decisions, I would allow them to pick their own clothes. I would teach them directions and ask them to show me how to get home from a subway map. I grew up in Houston, but we were living in Brooklyn, NY at the time. I also taught them how to play chess. This taught them how to make strategic decisions in life. I definitely see the benefit of these skills in their adult life. Their life decisions are well thought out before implementing.

It was important for me to instill a disciplined work ethic in them. I never “gave” them anything extra. I convinced them that they had to earn what they wanted by doing extra chores or by creating hobbies that provided a source of income. My youngest started making “spinners” in elementary school and was selling them for a quarter. He’d save up his money to buy candy or toys because that’s what he wanted. To see the pride in his eyes when he earned his money and bought his favorite trinkets was an indication to me that the lesson was learned. I would repeat to them “The world doesn’t owe you anything” like it was told to me. So, I’ve never expected anyone to come to my “rescue.” Everything I have ever had, I worked hard for and I wanted them to have the same attitude in life.

It was also important for me to teach them how to properly love and respect women. First, by not letting them witness anyone disrespecting their own mother and by literally giving them advice about how to approach and interact with females. I’ll never forget when my youngest wanted to ask a

girl in his class to the school’s Valentine’s Day dance. I took him to the store and bought him some candy and a small teddy bear. When he went to school the next day and followed my instructions, he literally ran back home excited and told me she said, “yes.” The excitement in his eyes were as priceless as they are today when I see him in love with his wife. The happiness in her eyes shows me that he learned how to love a woman well.

Having chores around the house was a double lesson.

This instilled a solid work ethic and sense of community because we all had to maintain the space that we equally shared. This also taught them how to maintain their own living quarters as adults. My oldest son was shocked when he went to college and some of his fellow classmates didn’t know how to properly do their laundry. So, the years of separating clothes and knowing the correct temperature to wash them was an appreciated skill when his mother was no longer around.

If I could do it all over again, I would have given more hugs and kisses. We would have had more conversations about their emotions and what they were going through. I couldn’t give them something that I didn’t have. My family wasn’t really big on hugs either. It was only after going to therapy myself that I understood the importance of mental and emotional health in maintaining a happy adulthood. Hopefully, I can instill this in my grandchildren.

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