50Lessonsin50Years

by-Latarsha Banks

June 7, 2023, I turned 50 years old and all I could think about was the lessons I learned and the people who influenced me to be the person I am today. I know many of you would think I’m only referring to the positive people, but I welcomed the others as well. They showed me who I didn’t want in my life. Hopefully, someone will find something useful as I share what I have learned!

If I fall down, I can always get up and try again. When we are babies, we learn so many things, but one of the most important is if I try it and don’t succeed, I’m going to keep trying until I master it. At two years old we learn that we are separate from our parents who we have been dependent on since birth. We learn to use the word No and it was okay to be selfish.

I can say my ABC’s and count to 10. Whenever I learned something new or accomplished something, it gave me so much confidence. It set the stage for the things I can do today.

I can empathize with others. When I was little and started to make “friends”, I didn’t want to see them hurt, I learned to understand how others feel. Welcome to Kindergarten! Being able to have time away from my siblings was great and when I came home from school, I was extremely happy to see them. I actually missed them. This taught me that it was okay to take time for myself.

I can read! My grandfather would have me read stuff to him all the time and I was so proud! I didn’t know then but as an adult I found out that a few of my elders couldn’t read and I was helping them. We never know how we can impact others without even trying to.

7. People can be mean! I started getting bullied because of my weight and I was a very emotional kid. Those same people that bullied me as a kid did not live great lives and years later many of them has told me, “I knew you would make it out.” That’s powerful!

8. Being accountable for my younger siblings taught me responsibility and the importance of family.

9. “As long as you accept yourself, that’s all that matters. Everything else will work itself out and if not, you didn’t need them anyway.”

10. Being molested made me ashamed of my body but it also opened up my curiosity about sex.

11. If I give my body boys will like me. I actually had something to touch, and this got me the attention I THOUGHT I needed.

12. I learned to say no and stick up for myself. When I told the person who was molesting me No for the first and last time, I felt so empowered, and I had no more issues with that person.

13. You don’t have to tell on me because I’ll tell on myself and you too if you are wrong. Be a leader!

14. Graduating from high school should be a must!!!!

15. Becoming a teen mom taught me I was a kid learning to be a parent instead of a girl learning to be a woman. It also taught me to prove people wrong about who they thought I would be.

16. How you get a man is how you keep them so pick wisely.

17. Being an adult is not all it’s cracked up to be. I still needed to be told what to do by my grandparents.

18. Don’t just get married because you can, choose wisely.

19. We attract what we put out and accept. Remember you are the prize!

20. Whatever career path you choose to do in life be great at it!

21. Never take on more than you can handle because God will never give you more than you can bear.

22. Sometimes we don’t choose careers, they choose us.

23. I deserve just as much love as I give.

24. Mental health is just as important if not more important than your physical health.

25. Have faith throughout the pain.

7. People can be mean! I started getting bullied because of my weight and I was a very emotional kid. Those same people that bullied me as a kid did not live great lives and years later many of them has told me, “I knew you would make it out.” That’s powerful!

8. Being accountable for my younger siblings taught me responsibility and the importance of family.

9. “As long as you accept yourself, that’s all that matters. Everything else will work itself out and if not, you didn’t need them anyway.”

10. Being molested made me ashamed of my body but it also opened up my curiosity about sex.

11. If I give my body boys will like me. I actually had something to touch, and this got me the attention I THOUGHT I needed.

12. I learned to say no and stick up for myself. When I told the person who was molesting me No for the first and last time, I felt so empowered, and I had no more issues with that person.

13. You don’t have to tell on me because I’ll tell on myself and you too if you are wrong. Be a leader!

14. Graduating from high school should be a must!!!!

15. Becoming a teen mom taught me I was a kid learning to be a parent instead of a girl learning to be a woman. It also taught me to prove people wrong about who they thought I would be.

16. How you get a man is how you keep them so pick wisely.

17. Being an adult is not all it’s cracked up to be. I still needed to be told what to do by my grandparents.

18. Don’t just get married because you can, choose wisely.

19. We attract what we put out and accept. Remember you are the prize!

20. Whatever career path you choose to do in life be great at it!

21. Never take on more than you can handle because God will never give you more than you can bear.

22. Sometimes we don’t choose careers, they choose us.

23. I deserve just as much love as I give.

24. Mental health is just as important if not more important than your physical health.

25. Have faith throughout the pain.

26. Love at first sight does exist.

27. God gives you what you need and some of what you want.

28. Treat people the way you want to be treated.

29. Dig in your own backyard before digging in someone else’s.

30. You will only get enough friends to count on one hand in this lifetime.

31. Do the next right thing and stay true to yourself.

32. A family is only as sick as their secrets.

33. It’s not my job to judge that’s God’s job.

34. I deserve to be happy no matter what!

35. It will get greater later.

36. God giveth and can taketh away

37. When you say your wedding vows make sure you understand what you are promising to do.

38. Becoming a grandma is one of the best gifts ever!

39. Hold on to the wisdom you have been given and share it when needed.

40. Your head is a terrible place to be alone.

41. I can be a little crazy and that’s okay as long as I’m not hurting myself or anyone else.

42. What you see is not always what you get, beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing.

43. Live and not just exist.

44. Having true peace is essential.

45. Boundaries, Boundaries, Boundaries with everyone

46. Never let anyone dim your light.

47. Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy path.

48. The things you don’t like about others are the things you don’t like about yourself.

49. Look for the similarities because the differences will always keep us blinded to the possibilities.