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My Aviation Mentor Retires His Wings

from AviNation Magazine Winter 2020

by AviNation

from AviNation Magazine Winter 2020, page 32

Article from: AviNation Magazine Winter 2020

Every Student Flies” in Aspen

by Natalie Kelley

I’M DEVASTATED. MY AVIATION MENTOR RETIRES HIS WINGS

It’s been no secret that my uncle has played a huge role in my love of aviation. After over 50 years of flying, my uncle Robert has officially declared the end of his flying “career.” Flying hasn’t been his career but it’s been his passion and hobby since he was in his twenties. He is 78. He’s had several friends perish in flying accidents over the years and he has recently come to realize his own aging and mortality. He has stated that he needs to quit flying before it’s too late, before he makes a deadly mistake. Many older pilots error by continuing flight when their decision-making skills and reflexes have slowed to an unsafe level. It’s a very difficult crossroads.

He and I have had lengthy conversations lately about his aviation life and family. It is a foreign, sad departure. He has no desire to piddle around flying in a Cessna 172. His love is with the warbird community and has always been driven by his love of formation flying and aerobatics. Anything other than that is of no interest to him. His airplane is officially for sale. He’s owned an airplane of some make and model for over 40 years. His hangar is full of tools, oil barrels, and rare airplane parts that he’s collected over his lifetime. To say this is sad for me as well, is an understatement. After our most recent and probably our last flight together, I decided to write about him, his journey, our relationship, and our shared love of aviation.

HOW IT BEGAN

My uncle and mother grew up very poor in rural middle Tennessee. They were from a family of nine children. Their father was a no-good, abusive, alcoholic, who was often incarcerated. Their mother died suddenly of a heart attack when she was in her 30’s. My mother was four. Robert was ten. They were in and out of family homes and orphanages. Alcohol wreaked havoc on their lives and wound up being responsible for several deaths in their family. Robert joined the Army at age 17. He served time in Okinawa. He was a paratrooper in the 82nd Airborne. Maybe this is where my adrenaline junkie side comes from?? While he was in the Army, he earned his GED. After serving his time, he used the G.I. Bill to fund his flight training.

Shortly after earning his private pilots license, Robert took my father, who had recently joined the Navy, on a general aviation flight in a rental airplane from Tennessee to northern Ohio. My dad’s recollection of the journey told the story of a naive passenger and bold, fresh pilot. Robert was not instrument rated at the time and they found themselves in deteriorating weather. Apparently, Robert requested a Special VFR clearance as they were nearing their destination to the shock of the controller, who said they were probably well below Special VFR operations minimums. They landed quite shaken and both took commercial flights home, leaving the rental aircraft there. My dad recalled with a laugh how bold, young and foolish they were. They vowed to never get into that position again.

From the very beginning of Robert’s passion for flight, he had an interest in aerobatics. Robert is a very smart, driven individual. He was determined to live a life better than his father did. Who really knows what makes one person successful over another?? Or more driven? There are many who cannot overcome obstacles, their past, or their upbringing. Robert is not a victim. He taught himself almost everything. He’s an avid reader and soaks up information. His

own aerobatic skills were self-taught. He read book after book on performing various maneuvers and then got in his plane and tested them! I can’t imagine trusting myself and doing that! To this day, he doesn’t have cable television, as he prefers to read. He’s an encyclopedia of knowledge, although not always politically correct…I have to occasionally chastise him for being too outspoken or opinionated. However, he’s now at the age where he really doesn’t give a damn. I just roll my eyes and say “Oh, Lordy! Did you really just say that out loud?!?”

OUR CONNECTION

It’s hard to say why some people or family members connect. He is stubborn as a mule (as am I) and strong as an ox. He is not easily deterred. These are similarities we share. However, when two people are very similar, there is often friction, as well.

My father was in the Navy. After some time moving from base to base, my mother decided to settle my sister and I in the small town where she spent much of her life, Charlotte, Tennessee. Population: 2,000. Robert, and several of my mother’s siblings lived in the area. Robert was more involved in my life than other extended family members. I’m not exactly sure why. Maybe because he felt he needed to fill in because my father was often gone. He had two sons of his own but he had interest in me and we got along quite well. He was my softball coach for many seasons. When he wasn’t my coach, he traveled to watch me play. He came to watch my basketball games and attended the football games, when I was cheerleading.

It was during these years that he and I began our flying together. I loved it from the very first time! His sons didn’t seem too interested in it, which was probably disappointing. I was always happy to be his companion. We would fly over the local landscape. He would send me laughing and squealing with delight while he practiced his aerial routines. He would run out of fuel before I’d ever get tired of the loops and rolls. He often performed in airshows with his buddies and developed a great love and skill in formation flying.

The first airplane we flew in together was a Chipmunk. He had that plane for years. He later became a Yak owner and aficionado. He developed a name for himself with his capability of working on Yaks. He’s had his share of forced landings while ferrying several Yaks; five, to be exact. He could certainly tell a story about each of his flights and forced landings! Thankfully, none of them kept him out of the air for long.

Our families vacationed together often. He and my dad got along very well and had similar interests. Unfortunately, my parents eventually divorced and I went off to college. Our time together became less and less. Nevertheless, when I’d come back to town, he always made sure there was money in my pocket. Several times he would cover unexpected and embarrassing expenses from traffic violations or insurance deductibles from careless fender-benders. Come to think of it, I probably owe him a few thousand dollars due to recklessness and stupidity. Yikes.

He still gave and gave unconditionally to me. My college graduation gift from him was a skydiving experience. We are both thrill-seekers, obviously. Once I had mentioned that skydiving was on my list of “things to do,” he arranged such an outing. Of course he did. It was one of my top ten life experiences! My oldest son has expressed a desire to jump and doing that with him would be incredible. It’s also a desire of

mine to someday join my new friend, Kat Healey, on the aerial demonstration team as a paratrooper to reenact historical jumps at air shows (I hope I have a long life because my list never ends!!!).

FAMILY RIFT COMES TO A HEAD AT MY WEDDING RECEPTION

There was a period when he and I weren’t speaking. It’s almost hard to fathom now but we had a confrontation. His first wife died of cancer. She was a huge part of my life for many years. When she became ill and eventually passed after years of battling cancer, we found ourselves in new territory. Without going into huge detail, we were dealing with unresolved issues and it came to a head. We didn’t speak for months until he asked for forgiveness. This took place, center stage, microphone in hand, during my wedding reception. My family and friends stared silently at each of us. You could have heard a pin drop. That’s what I remember most about my wedding reception. It was a difficult time and it took several more weeks and conversations to mend our relationship.

Maybe it takes going through such ups and downs to form a deep bond? As life continued, he became my confidante and cheerleader once again. He knew becoming a pilot was something important to me. After many years and three children later, he continued to prod and encourage me to go after that dream. I’d like to believe it was aviation that healed our rift once and for all. Aviation has actually allowed us a much deeper, honest bond. He has often included me in air show trips and introduced me to his air show family. He has been to Sun ’n Fun for 30 years straight except for one year when one of his sons was born!

He taught me many things about aviation before I even began flying. We would walk around the airshows and he would feed me information on certain airplanes and educate me on their ties with history. Slowly but surely, my desire grew to a level where I was confident and ready to learn to fly myself. My personal life suffered greatly during this time. He heard it all. We would sit in his truck and I would pour my heart out. He’d listen and never judge. He’s seen it all. This was a period of great growth for me but also heartache, confusion, and struggles. He listened and continued to love me and support me. Many times, after pouring my heart out, we would talk airplanes and maintenance. He would advise me on career paths or opportunities and continued to expose me to his aviation friends and family. Even when it became more and more obvious that getting around was becoming more challenging, he would walk from end to end of Sun ’n Fun or Oshkosh with me until I had my fill.

He’s hard of hearing (at selective times). That’s probably from years of flying without the proper ear protection. He’s not afraid to work and he’ll put me to work as well (with my not-so-subtle moaning and groaning), especially if it saves him a few dollars. It’s hard to imagine that he won’t be meeting me at airshows anymore. Hopefully, I’ll do him proud by continuing the Langford aviation legacy.