Debate | Issue 2

DEBATE ISSUE 02 | MARCH 2016

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CREDITS EDITOR Laurien Barks lbarks@aut.ac.nz SUB - EDITORS Amelia Petrovich Julie Cleaver DESIGNER Ramina Rai rrai@aut.ac.nz CONTRIBUTORS Matthew Cattin, Julie Cleaver, Kieran Bennett, Lara Posa, Amelia Petrovich, Kerryn Smith, Tyler Hinde, Robert Vennell, Ethan Sills, Shivan, Conor Leathley, Urooza Sarma ADVERTISING Harriet Smythe hsmythe@aut.ac.nz

Contributions can be sent to lbarks@aut.ac.nz

PRINTER Debate is printed lovingly by Soar Print

CO N T ENTS

Debate is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA) This publication is entitled to the full protection given by the Copyright Act 1994 (“the Act”) to the holders of the copyright, being AUCKLAND STUDENT MOVEMENT AT AUCKLAND UNIVERSITY OF TECHNOLOGY INCORPORATED (“AuSM”).

Reproduction, storage or display of any part of this publication by any process, electronic or otherwise (except for the educational purposes specified in the Act) without express permission is a break of the copyright of the publisher and will be prosecuted accordingly. Inquiries seeking permission to reproduce should be addressed to AuSM.

DISCLAIMER

Pg 5 Editor’s Letter

Pg 20 Apple: A Break Up Letter

Pg 34 Hostels and Homes

Pg 7 Prez Sez

Pg 22 Feature Artist

Pg 36 Cool Shit

Pg 8 Born to Boogie

Pg 24 Travelling Is Not A Sport

Pg 39 Super Bloat

Pg 10 The Island Of The Gods

Pg 26 We Need You!

Pg 40 Introvent

Pg 14 In Short

Pg 28 Oscars 2016

Pg 42 NYFW

Pg 16 Sam V

Pg 30 How to Connect with a Fellow

Pg 44 Reviews

Pg 17 3am Thoughts

Human Being

Pg 46 Recipe

Pg 18 Shakey Graves

Pg 33 AUT Sport

Pg 47 Puzzles

Material contained in this publication does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of AuSM, its advertisers, contributors, Soar Print or its subsidiaries.

AUSM.ORG.NZ

Cover illustration by Tyler Hinde FA C E B O O K . C O M / A U S M D E B AT E

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EDITOR’S LETTER Hey all, Not too long ago, it seemed like Kesha’s court case took over Twitter, Facebook, news sites, and pretty much every other major internet sector. I won’t give much of a back story because I reckon most of you know the basics, but ultimately, the judge in the case between Kesha and her producer, Dr Luke, denied Kesha the opportunity to be free of her contract with him. Thus consequently binding her to carry on working with a man she has accused of raping and abusing her.

Where do I start? With the positives, I guess. If Kesha really was abused, and truly is trapped in this contract, it’s incredible to see the kind of encouragement she has received. Celebrities openly showing their support, blog posts, tweets, Facebook rants, general conversation: people are talking about valuable change.

The issue of sexual abuse cases not being treated with the severity they deserve is being addressed, victims are being encouraged to seek the help they need, and all in all, these discussions have the potential to be amazing tools for moving forward in a part of society that still needs some solid work.

That being said, I’m pretty tired of feminist issues, such as this, being blown completely out of control by uninformed opinions, and a mob-mentality over social media. I’m sorry, but feminism is equality, equality stems from well-informed empathy, and empathy is based in broad research of all parties involved.

Feminism is not villainising a man through a giant messed up game of telephone across the internet. I’m a feminist. I want equality. I want rape victims to come forward. I want offenders punished. But good lord of the flies, people. You cannot chant for empathy, equality, and justice whilst simultaneously screeching to kill the pig, slit his throat, and bash him in. Impossible.

I mean, forget hitmen. You want to end a man’s life? String the right 140-character combo together.

Here’s the thing: I don’t know if Dr Luke is guilty. And neither do you. We weren’t in that court room and we weren’t hanging out with them over the years enough to witness anything going down. And yeah, there are some pretty messed up court officials in this world, but there’s also a lot of messed up people willing to lie about rape. I wish it wasn’t that way, but it is. I don’t think Kesha’s accusations should be taken lightly at all. They should be investigated in their entirety, because they are no small deal! But neither is Dr Luke’s denial of it all.

Kesha is stating that she was abused ten years ago. Since then, Kesha has denied under oath that Dr Luke has ever abused her or given her drugs. She has also admitted to believing she had a one night stand with a ghost and contracted either a haunted vagina or ghost baby pregnancy from the encounter. These two points alone speak volumes for the state of mind we’re dealing with here (and no, I am not victim blaming, I am bringing a valid, logical point into consideration). Producers and musicians fight, it’s a fact of life. The judge ruled in Dr Luke’s favour. These are all points that are skipped, skimmed, and ignored when we base our opinions off of social media headlines, and it’s dangerous.

We don’t have enough of the story to taint and borderline destroy this man’s name. One of the parties involved in this case deserves prison, and the other an apology. But it isn’t our call to make, nor is it our duty to perpetuate hatred of any variety. When we’re looking for a reason to hate this man, or more accurately, blinding ourselves to reasons not to hate him, we’re not standing for feminism. We’re not social warriors. We’re not advocates of change. We’re people looking for reasons to hate people. As if there’s any shortage of that.

Have a good week, Laurien

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PREZ SEZ

Kia ora AuSMers, I hope your first week of university was everything you hoped it to be! If not, don’t worry - there is plenty of time for it to impress you.

It’s all very exciting with lots going on and opportunities to meet plenty of new people. Research shows that students who make friends within the first six weeks are more likely to stay at uni, so go out there and make some friends! Uni is where I found one of my best friends.

I know you would have already been given the list of assessments you have to do in your handbooks, and trust me, you can do it.

It is achievable. A little tip: put all your assessments on your wall planner and diary now so nothing comes as a surprise. You can get them free from the AuSM offices if you don’t have one.

To all the students I met and talked to at last week’s events, you guys are amazing and I look forward to seeing you again! For those who haven’t yet got involved or joined in, please do! I will be at every night event, and change which campus I go to for day events.

I’m excited to watch the Rocky Horror Picture show for the first time, and the foam party is always fun!

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.” - Walt Disney

URSHULA ANSELL

Ursh x

Born to boogie Matthew Cattin After a particularly turbulent dumping, I would always lose my nerve. Feeling betrayed and battered by my failed ambition, I would plod onto the dry sand with a lump in my throat. Eyes stinging, coughing up seawater, I would seek comfort with the supervising adults.

“What happened?”

“I got DUMPED!” I would cry, throwing my boogie board onto the sand, furious at its inability to keep me afloat.

Convinced my six second submersion was just seconds shy of my death by drowning, I would madly watch the bigger kids catch wave after wave until I regained my confidence.

“I’m going back out!” I used to declare, heroically returning to the fray.

Self-destructive, masochistic, I was a lone wolf. The youngest in my pack of siblings and cousins, I was boogie boarding before I could ride a bike.

I started off small, sticking to the shallows and catching the white water while everybody else boarded “out deep”.

Otamure Bay was my stomping ground and I tell ya, those waves raised me. I was baptised in salt - there was sand in my

breast milk. If the waves were on - and as a kid that was every day - we would be out for up to eight hours a day, only stopping for a salty lunch in our wetsuits.

The first thing we would do upon waking up was run to the top of the dunes to check the surf. We’d sprint back to the tent, wolf down a breakfast, and await Mum’s cold sunblock hands with dread.

Once blocked, we’d slip through the fence and wait impatiently for an adult to supervise us.

Somewhat reluctantly, one unlucky grown up would emerge from a tent, perhaps the drawer of a short straw.

Beach chair under one arm, book under the other, they’d be left in our wake as we hightailed it to the waves.

As we grew up, the waves grew smaller and we boogied less frequently. But when cyclones or storms brought the big lumps across the Pacific, we’d be out on our Action Slicks, screaming in delight.

Sometimes the grown ups would join in for a few waves - that’s when you knew shit was going down.

A few years on, and boogie boarding had all but disappeared from my life. And then at 18, I bought my first surfboard. It felt like graduation, and boogie boarding was unceremoniously dumped from my life.

Until now.

I was camping in Matai in January, and low and behold, the waves were mountainous. Towering two to three metres in height and dumpier than your fat Aunt Pam, surfing would have been suicide for somebody of my skill level.

But, there was a sunshine yellow boogie board, and like an ex-lover in a moment of weakness and lust, I rode it with a pounding heart as though we had never been apart. It was wet, it was over in moments, and like all good rides, I ended up a little chafed.

Two weekends later, and I’m at a bach in Kuaotunu. Six friends, six boogie boards, and lesbehonest some pretty small surf, but Whakatane it was fun. For hours we rode party waves, splashed around, made up tricks, and even got dumped a few times. It was bliss. The magic was back.

The thrill was just as it ever was. And I can’t stop thinking about it.

After a hiatus of nearly a decade, I’m back.

It’s time to dig out those Action Slicks.

There’s a new dance in town.

It’s called the boogie.

The Island Of The Gods Julie Cleaver | Illustration by Tyler Hinde

In Bali, religion is not a concept; it’s a vibrant way of life that can be experienced through the senses. The sound of drums and traditional singing can be heard when walking past one of the many temples. You can see hundreds of small bamboo offerings filled with incense sticks, colourful flowers, and sometimes cigarettes or packaged candy. The fragrant wisps of smoke from these offerings spin in the breeze, filling the warm air with a constant smell of herbal tea. All of these sensations can be heard, seen, and smelt across the entire island, giving the haphazard and busy streets an underlying sense of unity.

Unlike the rest of Indonesia, which is Muslim, Bali is Hindu.

The reason for this is relatively complex, but to keep it simple, Indian traders brought Hinduism to Indonesia in the ninth century . Indonesia then built large ports in central locations and started trading with Muslims, who often chose to settle and marry the locals . These Muslim settlers eventually converted Indonesia into an Islamic nation. But Bali, being a far away place with little to trade, remained Hindu.

Since then, Bali, also known as ‘the Island of the Gods’, has been through a lot. It’s been invaded by the Dutch countless times, by the Japanese in the 1930s, and now, by the tourists.

Despite it all, the Balinese have managed to hold onto their religion and culture, which demonstrates how much it means to them probably more than anything else.

Hinduism has been in Bali for a long time, therefore its teachings are deeply ingrained in the psyche of the people.

Karma and reincarnation are two beliefs that affect the way the island operates, as it keeps people relatively honest. If you overpay a shopkeeper, they will often chase you down the street with the correct change, probably in an attempt to keep their karma out of the red.

A Balinese hotel owner called Sammi, who had six fingers on one hand, explained that when you die, if you were a good person, you would be born again into a higher life form. But if you were a bad person, you would be born into a lower one.

That is in essence what karma and reincarnation is all about.

“That’s why we have the caste system. If you are good and have good karma, you are born into a high caste, you know?”

If you overpay a shopkeeper, they will often chase you down the street with the correct change, probably in an attempt to keep their karma out of the red.

In Hinduism people are born into one of five different castes, which dictates their position in society. The higher the caste, the better you were in your past life. Speaking to local taxi driver, Made, revealed that, “If you are a Brahmin, you can be a spiritual teacher or leader. But if you are a Sudra, like me, you work.” Like Made, most Balinese are in the Sudra caste.

This means they work in relatively low-skilled jobs, either in the rice fields or tourism. However, Made said young Balinese don’t like the caste system and believe everyone should be equal. “They don’t want caste. They want to be like Westerners,” he explained, taking both hands off the wheel to reiterate his point.

Regardless of what caste people are born in, everyone worships the same Gods – all 330 million of them. That’s right, there are 330 million Gods in Hinduism, although they all originate from the same consciousness . It’s sort of confusing, but Sammi explains it simply, “My wife may like Krishna and I like Shiva. It doesn’t matter, they’re all the same God!” Others make sense of this belief by comparing the Gods to a government system. Like governments with hundreds of different departments, Hindu deities all take care of one particular section of the universe and work together with each other to achieve a common goal .

The Balinese have a deep love and appreciation for their Gods and as stated before, worship can be seen everywhere. Two-meter-high temple sculptures made of stone stand in guard of almost every house and shop on the island. Offerings are usually placed on top of these temples or in front of doorways three times a day. According to a Balinese language teacher Hana, women are in charge of preparing these offerings. This dedicated worship is partly why Rajiv Malik, an Indian journalist, said, “In some ways, Balinese Hinduism reflects a deeper philosophic understanding and a fuller incorporation into daily life than found in India.”

Another form of worship that made Rajiv Malik say, “I cannot imagine such an observance taking place in secular India!” is the celebration of Nyepi day, the Hindu new years, also known as ‘the Day of Silence’.

According to Yudah, a young, friendly Balinese man who works in tourism, on Nyepi day Hindus must stay indoors and refrain from doing basically everything.

They cannot use electricity, light fires, eat, or use any form of transportation. The Balinese airport even shuts down in honour of this special day. Yudah said with a chuckle, “When airplanes fly over Bali that night, it completely disappears. They cannot see it because there are no

Bali) said the ceremony was for a group cremation.

He said cremation was expensive, so people would bury their loved ones for up to two years until around ten people were ready to be cremated, and then they would all do it together.

lights!”

Nyepi day is an annual occurrence, however festivals, gatherings and ceremonies happen frequently, almost on a weekly basis. Women would often walk through the streets wearing traditional attire – a long, colourful skirt with a matching three quarter length blouse – whilst carrying a basket full of fruit on their heads, no doubt on their way to the temple. Ceremonies would also take place outside, on the street or near the beach.

On one Balinese island called Nusa Lembongan, a large ceremony suddenly erupted on a quiet, moonlit beach. Ten men with different sized drums strapped to their chest created a beat. Each person had a different note to hit and no one missed a single stroke.

A speedboat then pulled into shore, and people started pouring off it carrying big bowls of metal on their heads. They walked down the street and other people carrying extremely tall red umbrellas followed behind them. Tourists hung around the outskirts, taking photos and chatting in excitement. Within a few minutes, the ceremony had gathered a couple hundred people. Then almost as quickly as it began, it was over, as the entire party walked down the street and never came back. It was like a religious flash-mob.

That night a gentle father and hotel worker named Made (not the same one as before… it’s a very common name in

There are eleven different words for community in Indonesian, and after visiting its shores, its, easy to see why.

Ceremonies like this are a common sight in Bali.

Communities gather frequently to celebrate, mourn, worship, and reflect. The ebbing and sometimes crashing tides of life are experienced in groups, making people kuat bersama-sama, or strong together. There are eleven different words for community in Indonesian, and after visiting its shores, it’s easy to see why.

The Balinese Hindu faith has many beautiful elements, like their dedicated worship and beliefs in karma, but the most profound and striking phenomenon to witness was their sense of togetherness. It’s hard not to compare this communal lifestyle to western living, where people tend to endure all hardships and revere all achievements in the silent comfort of their own homes. The Balinese, like the Hindu Gods, share a common purpose and work together in harmony to achieve their goals, making it easy to see where this island got its nickname.

Key Feeling a Bit Left Out Following Minister for Economic Development Steven Joyce having a dildo heft at his face, and Minister for Transport Gerry Brownlee being covered in a ‘brown substance’, Prime Minister John Key has come forward to say he’s feeling a little left out.

Kieran Bennett

During 2016 Waitangi Day celebrations, a protester against the TPPA threw what was euphemistically referred to as a ‘sex toy’ at Steven Joyce. While Joyce took the ‘sex toy’ like a champ, the incident seemed to spark another case of a protester hurling something at a politician.

During the fifth anniversary memorial for the 2011 Christchurch Earthquake, a father of a quake victim threw a combination of mud, faecal matter and shredded insurance claims onto Gerry Brownlee. Much like Joyce however,

Brownlee also took it like a champ, saying that he’s often “neck deep in the brown stuff”. Brownlee has still not explained what that meant.

John Key has now come forward to say that he would also like a bucket of something, or perhaps a sex-related item thrown at him. “It’s just that when me and the boys gather round for a couple of Speights, shed our human skins and swap stories, I just don’t have any cool ones anymore. I need something thrown at me”. Key then went on to release a list of possible items, including a 20 pack family bucket, anal beads, or perhaps a few litres of the Greens’ tears.

Sale of anal beads have recently spiked, though this is likely due to the incoming approach of cold weather.

Jeb Bush Running For President This Whole Time uncharismatic drips who aren’t Donald Trump. Despite being crushed by over 20 percent in the first two primaries, Bush insisted on carrying on in the race.

This came as something of a surprise to his campaign team, who, up til that point had believed themselves to be a kind of well-branded personal grooming team. However, after a decisive victory once again by Donald Trump, Bush has decided to drop out of the race, claiming that he would instead prefer to spend his days caring for his begonias.

Kieran Bennett To the surprise and shock of everyone, most noticeably his mother, Jeb Bush has come forward to say that he was in fact running for president the whole time before he dropped out.

The Republican candidacy race has been a fractious one between front-runner Donald Trump and a variety of wet,

Immediately following his exit, many political analysts and Republican Party members slammed his campaign. It was the prevailing opinion that Bush’s campaign was weak, considering it had only been going for two, perhaps three days. CNN political analyst Gloria Berger said that she was unsurprised Bush only brought in 0.76 percent of the vote in South Carolina as “really, he just showed

up, threw his name down and hoped for the best”.

Now however, Bush has come forward and confessed that, for at least six months before the first primary, he was campaigning, investing well over two million dollars into a country-wide effort. This news has been met with some ridicule, but mostly confusion. The widespread consensus amongst not only political analysts and Republican Party members but also the public in general, is that Bush did not say or do anything of particular note for well over a year. If ever. Bush has disputed these claims, or at least this is what his ineffective, halfsilent mumbling has been interpreted as.

Latest reports show Bush now spends his time in the garden wearing his brother’s face and declaring himself President of Begonias.

Progress, Parking and Precautions

Lara Posa Work on the new Engineering, Technology and Design Building on St Paul Street is underway with demolition planned for the next three months.

While all possible measures have been

taken to minimise disruption during this time, you may still experience some noise and dust disturbances. The work also means that the pedestrian path between WM and WS (access from St Paul Street to Mount St) is closed and not expected to reopen until semester two. The Muslim Prayer Room, formerly located in WW, has now moved to level 0 in WT with access from Lorne Street.

The demolition has resulted in the loss of the St Paul Street carpark so parking at the city campus is further limited.

Anyone travelling to and from any AUT campus, but especially the city campus, should consider using public transport.

AUT has provided free shuttles between the campuses during Orientation Week.

time for would-be thieves. During this time and in general you should keep your belongings with you at all times or lock them away where possible. Personal items of value should be marked with a UV pen. While AUT operates several hundred cameras across its campuses you should remember that there are 30 hectares of property and up to 30 000 people to safeguard at the university at any peak period. So while all possible measures are taken to keep you and your belongings safe while you are on campus, every individual must take responsibility for themselves and their property.

Orientation Week at AUT is a fantastic time for students, but also an opportune

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SAM V

Parris Goebel has choreographed a new dance video, not for the Biebs, not for J-Lo but for Sam V, a kiwi kid just starting uni at AUT. The I Just Wanna Love U video came about as a result of ANZ’s new Fortune Favours the Brave campaign, which is to encourage tertiary-aged students to pursue their passions, put themselves in the way of opportunity, and reap the rewards.

We had a chat with Sam V about his experience, passions, and how he manages to balance it all!

What was it like working with Parris?

Quite the surreal experience! ANZ really hooked me up because Parris is absolutely killing it at the moment and is being recognised globally which is so cool for a kiwi chick. However, she’s also very down to earth, grounded and is the ultimate professional- being both incredibly talented and humble.

When did you discover your passion for music? What/who inspires you the most?

Music has always been prominent in my life- word on the street (Mum) is that I’ve been singing since about two. Dad was a musician and was always blasting jams so I guess I picked up some cheeky skills from listening and imitating. It’s never been so much a passion, rather it’s just always been something I’ve intrinsically done. In terms of inspiration towards music, I say it’s a mixture of fulfilment and listening to the works of other artists. I love writing and recording and hearing the end result. In terms of artists, one that springs to mind is Michael Jackson.

What’s your favourite album to chill out to?

Currently, I love listening to a bit of Rodeo by Travis Scott or Say it by Tory Lanez. Breezin by George Benson is also a nice lazy chill album that you can whip out a beverage to and laze in the sun- love it. Guilty pleasures are some of the tracks from Bieber’s Purpose.

How do you find balancing your dreams with university?

I have only just made a start, so hard to say - but in terms of school I’d just attempt to make time for both. I went hard on the academics (Cambridge) in year 12 and this gave me the luxury of having time to focus on music in year 13. I’d really just suggest having a good balance of academics, social life, music and me time.

Any advice for people who wish to do follow a similar path?

Make those connections! Take every positive opportunity and utilise social media- it’s a powerful tool and it only takes one lucky break (or person) to see your work and next thing you could have some sick opportunity. Also, remember to make good impressions on people in the industry and just in general. People with talent are loved, however an ego or arrogance can quickly dissipate that.

3AM THOUGHTS Sometimes our sub-editor, Amelia Petrovich, likes to wake herself up at 3am, record the first thought that comes to her head, and share it with the world.

January 31st, 3:00am “Blonde mend hi stop fighting right now” Hold on, look twice at this 3am thought guys, all is not what it seems.

Some is what it seems, this is yet another poorly thought out column piece based on scrawlings in the dead of night, but this time it’s not exactly the garble it appears.

This is the first 3am thought I’ve had after being torn straight from a linear, totally legitimate dream with a handful of characters and storylines. I don’t know what it is about sleeping in my childhood bed, but over the summer (when this particular 3am-er was formed) I was back in my too-small king single bed at my parent’s place dreaming scores of ridiculous dreams. And I know everybody thinks their dreams are ridiculous, but over the years mine actually have been. Like, whatever about needing to run and not being able to move your feet, has your Mum ever hauled you up to the top of a tower where The Wizard of Oz’s Wicked Witch of The West awaits your arrival except suddenly it’s not a tower it’s a GODDAMN DOCTOR’S SURGERY AND THE WITCH IS DRAWING ON YOUR TONGUE WITH A BIRO AND IT TASTES LIKE LIME SO YOU KNOW IT’S POISON?!?!

Yeah, that.

It’s what I deal with when I sleep in that bed, welcome home motherfucker.

Anyway, this 3am thought is actually just extended dialogue from a warped dream just like that one. Me and my nameless friends were walking through a sea cave that suddenly caught fire (because, as everyone studying Sciences will know, sea water is a top notch conductor of heat) and two people named Blondie (not “Blonde”, but I guess at three in the morning its okay to invent your own phonetics) and Mendhi were fighting. That’s all there was too it really, I just wanted Blondie and Mendhi my two clearly hipster friends to stop fighting and focus on the fire.

And yeah, I know it kind of looks like “Blond mend, hi…” but I can assure you I was addressing these two characters because dream-friendship is a bond that can never be broken. It also may have had a bit to do with the fact that when you wake up in such a dysfunctional way, while you don’t necessarily forget conventions like grammar and spelling, you certainly don’t give as much of a shit as you would in you waking life. I knew full well that the word “blonde” was pronounced “blond” and that “Mendhi” was one full word rather than an imperative and a greeting, but I threw convention to the wind because I was a sleepy, whimsical free spirit. I may be a craven loser by the light of day, but on the morning of January 31st I was courageous.

Because that’s what 3am thoughts do to, friends, they make you brave.

Garbled, fumbling, a tad strange, but bloody brave all the same.

Amen.

Shakey In the Knees Gracing the stage of Auckland City Limits 2016 with his crossed blues/country/rock n’ roll musical stylings, is none other than Shakey Graves. If this dreamboat’s name is unfamiliar to you, we suggest sorting that out as quickly as possible so you can start actually living your life. This vessel of talent is due to perform in Auckland and then Wellington on March 18 and 23, before dearly departing back to America.

So get amongst, kids, or you’ll be knee-deep in FOMO before you realize what’s even happened.

Laurien got a phone call from Shakey, screenshotted her phone logs, had a solid fan-girling session, and even managed to throw a few questions in his general direction for your reading pleasure.

What are you most looking forward to about New Zealand and Auckland City Limits?

Aw man, well I mean I love New Zealand, I was there about a year ago.

So I’m most excited about returning to a place I feel familiar with because I basically vacationed there for about a week and then played a show. So I think I’ll get to hit the ground running, I had such a good time last time I was there!

If you weren’t a musician what do you think you’d be doing?

When I was growing up, I always wanted to be an animator…so maybe an animator.

Do you have any pre performance rituals.

Usually a shot of tequila.

Do you have any ridiculous gig stories?

One time a long time ago, I was playing a show in Miami, and I had a really drunk woman yell at me a whole lot about playing Free Bird, and she wouldn’t let up. And she actually got so mad that I wouldn’t play Free Bird, that she got up and covered my face with her hand. Yeah so I basically played one more song, played maybe two songs at the place, and then just walked off stage. Yeah, and no one came to my rescue…nope, no one!

What are your thoughts on Donald Trump?

My thoughts on Donald Trump!? *laughing* We don’t even need to talk about Donald Trump. I have no thoughts about Donald Trump.

What would be your proudest moment in your career so far?

I mean, getting feedback from people like you, saying they’ve felt inspired to sing, perform, or pick up a guitar, you know. Any and all of the above, that’s the highest form of flattery.

You’ve got quite a unique music style, what took you in that direction?

Tonnes of things. I mean, it’s pretty much - my style is just how it sounds when it comes out. I have a lot of influences, I used to listen to a lot of old-timey folk and country music.

I also listen to strange, obscure indie-rock and super loud brash music, but any time I’ve tried to play a style, it just ended up coming out, undoubtedly how I sound. So I just sort of lean into and embrace the unique nature.

If you had a Tinder bio, what would it say? *laughing* It’d probably say “Fuck off”!

I have a few speed round questions for you to answer, they’re all questions that we don’t want you to think too long

about, just say the first thing you think of.

What’s your favourite ice cream?

Mint chocolate chip Favourite Film?

Land Before Time Favourite Animal?

River otter Book?

Sword in the Stone by T.H. White Favourite Song to dance to when you’re alone?

5 seconds by Twin Shadow What’s the last thing you Googled?

Show times for the new Michael Moore movie that’s playing right now.

What’s your favourite thing to read on a sign in the audience?

Usually anything with a really bad pun in it. Like Shakey Shakey, Eggs and Bakey kind of stuff.

Anything to look out for on the horizon, anything to get excited about?

I’m going to be in my high tech, music creating facility making a new album all year, so that’s something to get excited about!

Apple: A Breakup Letter Amelia Petrovich

This isn’t easy for me to say, but I think it’s high time that I come clean…

I love the way you do things, but would it hurt you to co-operate with a cheap iPod charger just once?

…I’ve kind of been thinking about leaving you.

Honestly, I feel manipulated and hurt. Yes you have nice apps that run well but there’s a whole world of other apps out there that you won’t support. Androids support everybody and everything, I hate to be the one to draw comparisons but it’s true. There’s even some apps that you installed before I knew you that you can’t get rid of at all- what are you so afraid of?

With you I have no freedom, you break every couple of years and I’m forced to upgrade, not only to a totally new device but to all new plugs, cables, bells and whistles as well. You say you love me, but recently I’ve been feeling like a pawn in your twisted, capitalist love games.

I don’t mean ‘leaving’ like I did in ’09, that summer where I abandoned you to the glove box of the car while I went bush on our family camping trip. I mean this time it might have to be for good.

Don’t get me wrong, you and I have had an amazing run. I still remember the first time I laid eyes on you, so sleek and white and sexy. It didn’t matter to me that all my friends had you too, that was kind of what made it exciting you know? All of us high school kids, giddy with the excitement of our first iPhone or Macbook, they were simpler times. In those early days I couldn’t tear myself away from you, you were so much faster and prettier than anything I’d ever used before, all blue and grey text boxes with curved lines.

You also made me feel so safe, you never seemed to get viruses like the other laptops and your phone interface became so familiar. It was heaven, for a while.

This is a letter I never wanted to write. You look so good in my lecture hall alongside all the other glowing fruit logos, but sometimes I feel like that’s the biggest problem. There are so many of you and your own out there now, I think you’ve squashed the very individuality you strived to create in the first place.

You must know how initially dazzling you are, but the sad truth is that in time I began to see you through different eyes. For one thing, you don’t seem to like any of my friends. It was always okay for us to hang

You might not hear from me again, and I know it hurts us both to have come to this. But I’ve gotta do what’s right for me.

out with one of your kind, an iPhone 4S cable perhaps or a snow-white plug converter, but as soon as I tried to throw something non-branded into the mix you never wanted to play ball.

TTYN, Amelia. xo

feature artist

KERRYN SMITH Age: 20 Dream Job? Degree: I graduated from a Bachelor of Design, majoring in

To become a Graphic Designer with the skills and freedom

Graphic Design last year.

to pursue a range of different creative projects.

How would I describe my style?

My style would be a mix of hand drawn and digital ele-

We love showcasing our AUT student artists around here!

ments.

So if you know anyone who you think deserves the spotlight (including yourself, you humble cherub, you), get in touch with

Who are your major influences?

raminarai@aut.ac.nz with a brief introduction, and a sample of

Sagmeister and Jessica Walsh, Misery, Gingerhaze

your best work!

Mini Medic Product Range 2015 (final design project 2015)

Travelling is not a sport

Julie Cleaver The air was thick. It rested sluggishly on the land and blanketed everything in a dense, warm moisture. A group of us sat in an open-walled hostel lounge that overlooked terraces of green rice paddies.

We sipped cheap beers and talked casually about places we had been. A girl from Australia started going on about art sits in Germany. She had green hair and tattoos on both calves. “They’re like little anarchist communities with no rules. Except no drugs, because that really messed them up a few years back.”

An American guy who wore rose pink aviators interrupted her, “that’s so touristy now though.” He said bluntly. “But when I was in Russia, that was friggen’ crazy.”

Half way into his story about a prison, a

different Australian girl with short blond hair cut in. She started talking about her four months in Afghanistan, and how it was an “unbeatable experience.” After she spoke, the conversation grew quiet. The group seemed to be in agreement – she won that round.

Travelling in itself is not competitive. Anyone with privilege, a job, and a reasonable saving strategy (only one coffee a week) can do it.

For the two months I was in Bali I heard this conversation repeatedly. It wasn’t from the same people and it wasn’t always about Germany or Russia or Afghanistan. But it

always sounded the same, as it was always competitive.

Travelling in itself is not competitive.

Anyone with privilege, a job, and a reasonable saving strategy (only one coffee a week) can do it. It’s not hard, and it definitely doesn’t require any skill – unless you count limiting caffeine as one. Yet some people use globe hopping as a form of social currency.

They count countries they’ve been to on a scorecard. They toss around crazy experiences like basketballs, the more out there, the more points. They do things they never normally would in their home countries just to rack up points from ‘the shock factor’. And their arena isn’t just a hostel lounge. It’s social media – meaning travel boasting is now everywhere.

Some friendly competition is good. It pushes you to try harder and do better. But travelling is not competitive, and thinking it is ruins it. That’s because the essence of travelling stems from curiosity. Genuine, childlike, ‘I wonder what’s over there’ curiosity. And when that spark is clouded by what someone thinks is cool and worth being curious about, it is no longer special or spontaneous or real.

It becomes jaded and fake, like a plastic tiki.

Also, in order for something to be competitive, there has to be a winner, which obviously implies there must be a loser. This is bullshit for reasons you and I are well aware of. If you chose to go on a journey you are not a loser, no matter how intrepid or packaged it may be. The only losers are those who don’t learn or have fun.

In saying that, I don’t blame or look down on people who travel competitively. The desire

to etch your name in the sand or scribble it on a bathroom wall exists for a reason.

People want to define themselves. They want to prove themselves. They want to state, “this is me and this is why I’m special/unique/ awesome.” And visiting new places is a way to do that.

Some friendly competition is good. It pushes you to try harder and do better. But travelling is not competitive, and thinking it is ruins it.

Plus, for many young people travelling is a right of passage. It’s a coming of age pilgrimage undertaken to prove they are worthy of entering the adult world.

People’s self-worth is often tied up in their intrepid stories, so it’s no wonder they show them off like shiny trophies.

However I think the true purpose of travelling is not to collect stories, but memories. Moments where you are so tired, hungry, drunk or uncomfortable you get filled with an insane feeling of euphoria for no real reason. Moments where you walk along the beach and find a purple coral shell which you hide in your pocket and keep forever.

Or moments where you meet strangers who quickly become old friends, and you all get high off the amazing joy of connection.

These are the golden moments that should be shared and compared and remembered.

And the clunky, annoying, good-for-nothing gold trophies should go where all the other medals and certificates go – in a cupboard, where only those who truly care will see them (your mum).

Debate’s looking for some new team mates to help make it better than ever, and we reckon there are a bunch of you out there who have the skills we’re looking for!

NEWS WRITER You fancy yourself a journalist? Love getting out and amongst the action, gathering interviews, and reporting the real scoop?

We’ve got an opportunity with your name on it, my friend. We want an ‘in the field’ reporter getting amongst the AUT and local Auckland activities, writing blurbs about ‘em, and flicking them our way to publish each week! Sound like something you’re into?

Email lbarks@aut.ac.nz your CV, cover letter, and a sample of your writing – Laurien will be in touch shortly. Might have to wait a few day because she doesn’t want to appear clingy, but don’t worry, she’ll get back to you.

DEBATE INTERNS We’re looking for writing as well as artistic interns to join our lil team here in the office. If you’re on the hunt for experience, resume padding, and a hilarious bunch of co-workers, than look no further! Get in touch with lbarks@aut.ac.nz if you’d like to get amongst this sweet, sweet opportunity!

Positions are open for both semester one and two!

PHOTOGRAPHER We’re on the hunt for a photographer with artistic flair who can creatively compile the perfect photo for articles each week.

If you’ve got a great camera, and a passion for photography, we’d love to have a chat with you and see some of your work! Get in touch with ramina.rai@aut.ac.nz with your cover letter, CV, and some examples of your previous work!

PIGGY PAL Hi! My name is Robert, and for my Master’s thesis, I’m going to be researching feral pigs and the damage they cause to the native environment. The research will take me tramping and camping into the heart of the Hunua Ranges, and I need some volunteers to join me on these expeditions.

What’s involved?

• We will be installing pig cameras and setting up plots to monitor pig disturbance.

• Sometimes the work may take several days, in which case we will be camping out in houses, huts or tents.

What’s in it for you?

• Gain work experience and learn bush skills • Adventure into the wilderness • Have the chance to see some incredible native plants and animals (such as Kokako) • Free chocolate What am I looking for?

• Keen outdoorsy people, preferably with a bit of tramping experience • Able to spare a day or several days to help out If this sounds like something you might be interested in, please get in touch: Robert rven674@aucklanduni.ac.nz The first monitoring round will be from the end of Feb – end of March so if you have a day or couple of days free during that period let me know. Otherwise there will be plenty more chances to help throughout the year.

Oscars 2016 Ranking the Best Picture Nominees Ethan Sills Bridge of Spies Let’s be honest, this pretty much got nominated because Stephen Spielberg directed it: he could direct the next Avengers movie and would sweep the awards. There is nothing wrong with Bridge, but there wasn’t really anything special about it either. It looked amazing, had a solid script and a typically smooth performance from Tom Hanks, but mostly it was a competent but bland movie.

Maybe next time, Spielberg.

The Revenant First thing’s first: The Revenant looked amazing. It certainly deserved Oscars for its direction and cinematography, no questioning that. However, I am very glad it didn’t take home Best Picture. It was just really boring, and just dragged on and on without really needing to. By the time Leo and Tom Hardy are fighting by the river, I wanted nothing more than to go home.

Leonardo was great, but the role was pretty much just him nearly dying a lot. It felt tailored to give him as many ‘Oscar-y’ scenes as possible. Frankly, the Academy should have given it to someone else since eating raw liver and climbing into a dead horse isn’t really acting. This was the best episode of Man vs Wild ever, but that doesn’t mean it was a great movie.

The Martian When I started writing this article, I had to go back and check if I had actually reviewed this last year. Turns out I did, and gave it four stars at that. I had forgotten how much I had originally enjoyed it, though, to be fair, my memory has probably been soured by it getting Best Comedy at the Golden Globes. It definitely was an entertaining movie, and Matt Damon was great in the lead, but did it deserve a Best Picture nomination, or him an acting nod? It’s nice of the Academy to recognise something a bit different than their normal fare, but there were a number of better movies last year that deserved the recognition more.

The Big Short Though entertained by the trailers, I sat down to watch this with some trepidation as to whether I’d actually enjoy it. Given that I spend most of my cash on t-shirts, money isn’t my strong suit, so a whole movie about the financial industry isn’t my usual cup of tea. And despite the film’s attempts to make the financial crash understandable and fun, I still didn’t wholly understand the finer details. However, Big Short is still a wildly entertaining, if ultimately quite depressing, movie. With a lot of humour, tight editing and a number of great performances (any of them probably deserved a nomination more than Christian Bale though – can people stop being recognised just for playing people with Asperger’s?), sitting through all the financial talk really pays off big time at the end. I wouldn’t have thought it Best Picture material, but it was highly entertaining.

Room I saw a parody poster for this a few weeks ago that renamed it to Sad: The Movie, which is a fairly succinct way of summing up Room.

The story of a young woman kidnapped and forced to live in a shed with her son, it requires a lot of patience to sit through the first hour with just the two characters, but pays off when they do get out and both mother and son adjust to the outside world. Brie Larson certainly deserved her Oscar, and Jacob Tremblay is bound for huge things if this performance is anything to go by. Definitely not for the faint hearted or those who can’t stand kid actors (it can get a bit screechy at times), but it’s as likeable as a movie about rape can be.

Brooklyn This is one of my favourite films to emerge from the awards season. It is a straightforward, simple story about a girl immigrating to America that simply works without having to be flashy. Saoirse Ronan is amazing as Eilis and would have been a worthy winner of Best Actress. It may not seem like something you’d rush to the cinemas to see, but Brooklyn never tries to be anything more than it needs to be, and tells it’s story perfectly.

An unabashedly lovely movie that deserves more credit than it’s getting.

Mad Max: Fury Road In another world, in another awards ceremony, this would be the clear winner. A well-made, well directed, well-acted action movie, it is clear to see why this swept the technical categories. Despite the wishes of a large part of the internet, this was never going to win Best Picture, but I am glad that it was given the recognition it deserved. Despite the simple plot, Mad Max was an amazing technical achievement and deserves every bit of praise it has received.

Spotlight From the trailers, Spotlight may just look like some bland, by-thebooks drama that the Academy usually loves, but to experience this in cinemas, there is no denying what a powerful, wellconstructed movie this is. I saw this a week before graduating, and to see how a small team of journalists could have uncovered something with such huge consequences was truly inspirational, but that message wouldn’t have been as powerful without the fantastic cast, script and direction coming together to tell this story properly. Spotlight, without a doubt, more than earned Best Picture: an undeniable instant classic.

How To Connect Wit h A Fellow Human Being Amelia Petrovich

I stood at the bus stop, headphones in, staring up at buildings, completely in my own zone.

Suddenly a pair of blue eyes abruptly ended my daydreaming, a little too close for comfort, the owner of them looking like he was trying to figure out who the hell I was.

Maybe this was an old friend I’d forgotten about, the 20cm or so between us definitely seemed to indicate familiarity, so I unplugged myself from my thumping Flume track and extended a hand.

“Do I know you?”

Then, without even a blink or falter, the response; “No I don’t know you, but I wish I did.”

Boom, there you go. The shots continued; “What’s your name?”

“Are you part Maori?”

“You have really green eyes” “Do you have a boyfriend?”

And then after a hasty lie, my personal favourite, “Oh damn… is your relationship going well then?”

In less than a minute my peaceful Saturday amblings had been turned into a confusing game of Pick Up Some Random Chick- Rapid Fire Addition and I really hadn’t enjoyed becoming prime target. This person sat next to me on the bus and for fifteen more minutes I embellished the

story of me and my fraudulent (but very impressive and enchanting) boyfriend until I was able to hop off the bus and walk away, incredibly annoyed.

I’m the kind of person who is a total pain, so I know that other people can be totally painful too. So, when I walked away in solitude again, I took what I thought was a pretty big-picture stance on what had just gone down. It wasn’t the fact that this person had invaded my personal space without verbal or implied consent that annoyed me, nor was it his instant ethnicity guessing attempts or cut-to-the-chase style questioning about any boyfriends I may or may not have. What struck me after the fact is that maybe, somewhere in the chilly outhouse of humanity, there are a few people who still haven’t grasped that to make someone’s heart flutter (or even just to make them smile) you have to sort of, maybe, possibly, treat them like a person.

I almost titled this article ‘How To Pick Up A Girl’, but now it’s ‘How To Connect With A Fellow Human Being’, because honestly they shouldn’t be any different. Allow me to explain what I mean: Let’s take a look at this person who approached me on Saturday. Notice that I’ve not used any pronouns so far for said person, that’s totally on purpose. I’m a writer and I’m allowed to do stuff like that, I’m also allowed to say for argument’s sake that this person is called ‘Charlie’. Now they can be whichever gender you want, hooray for equal representation! Imagine what you will. Here are a few things Charlie should have remembered.

1) Conversation is key Conversation, not just a chaotic blurting of sexually charged questioning. Obviously if you see a person that you reckon is a bit alright looking and you’re game enough to approach them, the true end result is to ascertain if they’re attracted to you too. However, this shouldn’t be the whole line of conversation.

Opening a chat with “you’re hot, I want to know you, do you have a partner?” might answer all your important questions, but it doesn’t do a lot to instill trust or respect. The way Charlie kicked off our conversation was a bit like saying “The amount I want to talk to you is directly related to how easy I think it’ll be to bang you.” Sex sure is a lot of fun to talk about, but I didn’t know Charlie and probably would have preferred talking about other fun stuff for a bit first, like good movies that are showing right now, or how to show people that you’re interested in what’s inside their heads rather than what’s inside their pants.

2) Ethnicity isn’t the best conversation starter In the suburb where Charlie grew up, most people are white New Zealand Europeans. That sounds presumptuous but I know because Charlie told me, statistically speaking this is an actual truth about Charlie’s life. Naturally then, Charlie is curious about anybody who appears different to this in some way and that’s fine.

However, introductions are really not the time for kicking off “what kind of not-like-me person are you?” games because they instantly make whoever you’re questioning feel like an outsider. Making a stranger like you is a lot about showing them that you’re both on equal footing, and by asking me about my ethnicity straight away, it felt a lot like Charlie was exoticising me and throwing me in that “other” box. In actual fact I call myself ‘NZ European’ in every census too, but Charlie looked at me, saw something different, and decided that it was an okay time to bring it up. I like talking about my heritage, but treating me like a fun guessing game the first time we meet is a lot more fun for you than it is for me.

3) Who gives a shit if I’m single?

Shouldn’t the question actually be whether or not I’m interested?

Sure, I’m not really the poster girl for this regarding Charlie specifically (a braver person than me would have risked making a stranger blush in public by saying “sorry, you’re intimidating and I’m not keen”), but it’s a little sad that so many people would sooner take the presence of a romantic rival as a reason to back off before an actual lack of interest/consent. It’s also a real dick move to stop talking to someone or treat them any less convivially if you do find out they’re taken. You run the risk of implying that the person you’re introducing yourself to is only valuable as a commodity, rather than an entire human. Maybe I was asked out last night, maybe I’m happily married, but none of this is going to make me any less of an awesome person to get to know and fuck you for implying that’s the case to be quite honest. Even if a person isn’t romantically available they may still be fantastic bus banter Charlie, they may still be worth your time, and they might even teach you something.

The thing that gets me about all of this though, the entire article I’ve just written, is that it’s a complete catch twenty-two as far as our friend Charlie is concerned. See, while it could have been very helpful, Charlie will never read any of this because Charlie never connected with me as a fellow human being and I literally never want to talk to Charlie again. If that connection had happened, the article might not have because I wouldn’t have been pissed off enough to write it. So maybe this isn’t for Charlie at all actually, maybe it’s for all the rest of us. Let this be a small beacon of hope. Someday, maybe in our lifetime, people of all creeds and genders might read rant-y writing like this and conclude that affection is won by rapport and respect rather than rapid fire. And when that day comes I’ll gladly tuck my headphones into my pocket and tell you what I’m all about, but until then, I’m afraid I’m not interested, keen, ‘down for it’ or frothing.

SPORTS PROFILE

KARL NOYER Karl Noyer is studying towards a Masters of Sport and Exercise at AUT. Karl is a New Zealand 3x3 Basketball representative and has played for the AUT Men’s Basketball team every year he has studied at the University. Karl has also taken on the role of coach of the AUT Women’s Basketball team. Karl will be representing AUT at the upcoming New Zealand 3X3 Inter-Tertiary Basketball Competition on March 18.

What is your highest sporting achievement?

Representing NZ at the 2014 3x3 World Championships in Russia and followed by being the number one ranked player in NZ for 3x3 (2015/2016).

How do you fit your sporting commitments/travel around your uni life?

I have a pretty good support team around me including my partner, family and friends. Whenever I get too busy and need help, they are always there to help me. AUT also provide me with the support I need to be able to play a number of tournaments throughout the year.

What are your sporting goals and where do you see yourself in 5 years?

My biggest sporting goal is to play 3x3 in the Olympics in Tokyo in 2020. This is assuming 3x3 becomes an Olympic sport in 2020.

What’s the best piece of advice you have been given?

No pain, no gain! And never give up!

See Karl Competing at the NZ Tertiary 3x3 Basketball Championships on Friday March 18 at Waikato University.

AUT Sport AUT Sport delivers a range of activities for Students, staff, and alumni. From recreational games and on campus activities, through to international competitions, AUT Sport provides opportunities for everyone to be involved.

Happening Soon All trials taking place at the AUT Sport and Fitness Centre on the North Shore Campus: AUT Netball Trials - starting March 8.

AUT Volleyball Trials - March 11, 16, 23.

AUT Men’s Basketball Trials - March 14, 18, 23.

AUT Women’s Basketball Trials - March 16, 23 Inter-Faculty Touch Tournament – April 1 at Hato Petera College.

Come and represent your faculty at the first Inter-Faculty Tournament for the year. Contact sport@aut.ac.nz To find out more contact AUT Sport sport@aut.ac.nz or pop into WB119 for more information. www.aut.ac.nz/being-a-student/sport-at-aut www.facebook.com/autsport/

HOSTELS AND HOMES Urooza Sarma

I’ve been thinking a lot about change. But that’s what happens when you dive head first into a tidal wave of change with no game plan. Suddenly, you find yourself trying to find the old you in a new situation, basking in the unfamiliarity of it all. And then, just as suddenly, you float out with the tide and realize the thing that’s been changing the most, is you. And what a crazy, frightening and wonderful feeling that is.

2015 was my lost year. It was mostly terrifying, certainly foreign, and utterly confusing. But as I saw out the rest of that year, I had my recurrent realisation that being lost is a way to find new things. And in this case, the new “thing” was me.

So here I am, sharing in bits, some of my rosetinted reflections from the “lost year” and what I’ve found from it. A way to take away the good parts, toss out the bad and love the fact that after everything, we all float on okay.

By July of last year, I had attempted to make a home out of three cities. So when I moved to Dunedin, my restless, confused self wasn’t quite ready to accept this new “home”. This small city, with its easy walking access, love for cheeky banter and terrible weather seemed bigger and more foreign than anywhere else I’d been.

I wish I was the poster child for adventure, but the thing is, I’m frigidly afraid of change, and so it became easier to treat Dunedin like a hostel rather than a home. A place to keep my belongings, but not the place to keep my heart.

Dunedin hadn’t been part of my original type A life plans, and a part of me knew that building connections, giving it all I had, calling it home, meant those plans I thought I knew so well would get further away. So I confused familiarity with attachment, holding on to fragments of an old Urooza out of dependency and fear, rather than love.

I treated Dunedin with the temporary disregard of a hostel, but hostels are more of a learning curve than I realised. This hostel was a stepping stone to meeting new people, creating new perspectives, making new adventures. It allowed me to discover dark pockets of my personality I didn’t think existed. It allowed me to realise that I didn’t like that. It allowed me to accept and change them. And mostly, it helped me move forward.

So cheers Dunedin, for teaching me that you can’t swim forward if you’ve got one hand holding onto the pier. For making me question and challenge different parts of my personality.

For teaching me that the way to cope with frigid temperatures and dark days is to surround yourself with the warmest and brightest people.

And for showing my naive self what a culture of binge drinking really entails.

It may have taken a while, but this hostel is finally a home.

COOL SHIT

The Idea Collective If you think MOTAT is just for kids, then their new contemporary innovation/art space The Idea Collective should change your mind. In collaboration with local designers, innovators and artists, the super stylish installation offers a space for visitors to explore and discuss ideas around innovation, technology, and creativity. These guys are giving away five double passes to the first five people to Facebook message their details to facebook/theideacollectivenz! You can also check out their Facebook page for details on how to win a TomTom Bandit Action Cam!

Speaking of Cool Shit‌ Multi-award winning Australian stand-up comedian, writer, and actor, Felicity Ward, returns to New Zealand with a new stand-up show about mental illness, irritable bowel syndrome and her search for the nearest toilet. The deeply personal and outrageously funny What if There is No Toilet? Plays at the Herald Theatre, Aotea Centre, in Auckland from Tuesday 26th – Saturday 30th April!

Good Morning, Good Morning To You Morning routines can be busy but also yummy, if you include the deliciousness of Goodness Every Morning Moisturiser to it! Imagine smooshing all the goodness of a fruit smoothie onto your face, well this can be a reality with Goodness Every Morning Moisturiser and you will feel great about nourishing your skin with the best! This moisturiser retails at just $19.99 in selected Countdowns, Farmers, and New Worlds nationwide!

OH, YOU’RE SUCH A CARD! Student life is better with StudentCard! It grants its holders the opportunity to save on everything from computers and tech to movies and gigs, power for the flat, travel and accommodation, books, gyms, and heaps more! We’ve got two to give away to the first two people to email lbarks@aut.ac.nz with their name, campus, and their go-to impulse buy.

AMAZE ME! Odyssey is a walk through adventure where, while trying to find your way out of a maze, you will experience darker, challenging spaces, quirky physical obstacles and challenges, illustions, lighting effects, and strange sensations that, all together, provide you with a unique experience you will never forget!

Debate has a double pass to give away to the first person to Facebook message us their name, campus, and a cute hello!

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The Super Bloat Connor Leathley A review of America’s annual bluster bowl.

They say that everything is bigger in America. The cities, the portion sizes, the rhetoric of certain presidential candidates.

So, naturally, the same should also apply to the National Football League’s (NFL) signature game, the Super Bowl. 2016 also happened to be the 50th anniversary of the event, which was sure to make it even more bombastic than usual.

This is the final match of the season for America’s favourite sport, with the two competing teams being the winners of their respective conferences; representing the American Football Conference (AFC) was the Denver Broncos, who were led by wizened legend Peyton Manning, who was hoping to ride a dominant defence to his second Super Bowl ring.

Contrasting the Broncos were the heavyweight contenders Carolina Panthers, who had only lost one game all season in the lead up to the Super Bowl.

Attempting to stake his claim to the iron throne was icon/entertainer and reigning Most Valuable Player (MVP) Cam Newton, who was hoping to be only the third ever African-American quarterback to lead his team to a championship. The Panthers were the chic pick to win the game, which would have been the franchise’s maiden title.

As is often unfortunately the case with upstart teams, the Broncos put their opponents to the sword, prevailing 24-10 in what was a scrappy, if underwhelming, affair. Perhaps even more unfortunately is the fact that the result on the field may have been academic to many of the viewers. Sure, the result is of extreme importance to the respective franchise’s that are competing on the day, as a win puts the victor in a pantheon of greats and tends to christen any legacies.

the game. Oodles of people don their red, white and blue for the theatrical national anthem, this year helmed by Lady Gaga.

Some may only tune in at half time to watch the generally underwhelming halftime show, who would have seen an out of element Coldplay being saved by Bruno Mars and Beyoncé. And then there are the ads, where companies spend over seven figures to market their product for 60 seconds or less. All of which adds to its four plus hour run time.

‘...it does seem that the Super Bowl has transcended being just a ‘sport contest’, and is much more of an entertainment event.’

I’m not even sure that the media may have not even cared much about the result, considering how the game was covered afterwards. Much of the plaudits where handed to Manning, despite the fact that his poor play was the one thing that kept the Panther in the game. This could be

However, it does seem that the Super Bowl has transcended being just a ‘sport contest’, and is much more of an entertainment event. Case in point: people tune into the FIFA World Cup Final to see if Messi will capture his first World Cup trophy. Eyes are glued to the 100m dash in the Olympics in the hopes that Usain Bolt will once again create history. So on and so forth.

Conversely, there are reasons to watch the Super Bowl that have nothing to do with

owed to the fact that ‘The Sheriff’ is revered by many in the NFL community, and he may have just played his last game. All the press that did not go to Manning went to Newton, who upset white middle-aged journos everywhere when he walked out of his press conference, when it was clear he did so because he heard a Broncos player bragging in the next room.

The greatest trick that the NFL ever pulled was convincing the world that it was a sports event. But it is a wildly lucrative formula that will be rinsed and repeated annually. One can only imagine what the one hundredth anniversary will look like.

May God have mercy on us all.

introvent Amelia Petrovich

I think, as it has been with most things, it was Tumblr that started it.

God knows I need to haul my ass away from that hip-kid, John Green quoting cesspool but for some reason I find myself scrolling through it on lonely Saturday nights, all the while becoming more and more livid.

The sins of Tumblr are numerous, but this time what pissed me off was the proliferation of what I reckon I’d like to call “romanticizing introverts” or better yet, “introvert worship”. I mean, in a way I sort of get it. Tumblr is a platform that lends itself to solitude, and often when people consider introversion, a lack of other people is what they think of first. If you’re slobbing around in your pyjamas munching pizza with Tumblr in front of you while everyone else is out at a party, you’re probably going to feel the need to justify what you’re up to.

Boom, cue the “omg that feel when you’re such an introvert you’d rather eat pizza alone than go talk to people lol” posts and reblogs. And they do get a bunch of reblogs, not because they’re particularly insightful

or different, but because they’re common feelings. I don’t think it matters if you’re a self-confessed introvert or a total extrovert, odds are that at some point you’ve preferred solitude to company, even if for just a moment.

The article was called “10 Signs You’re an Outgoing Introvert”, a title that could have easily been exchanged for “10 Signs You’re A Normal Effing Human Being”.

It’s not really the fact that people can unite over common experiences that gets me riled though, I think it’s everybody’s sudden need to be an introvert, as if it’s an amazing little club that absolves you certain social responsibilities. I feel like in some circles, extroversion is prized because it means

you’re social, friendly and animated, whereas in my circles it’s introversion that is coveted because it somehow morphs you into a beacon of insight, depth and broody mystery.

At the end of the day, neither assumption is strictly true, yet we all continue to be in pursuit of one or the other.

The romanticism of introverts reached peak ridiculousness for me personally though when I came across a specific Facebook article, one of those Idealist4Ever numbers that isn’t particularly good but does get a lot of traffic. The article was called “10 Signs You’re an Outgoing Introvert”, a title that could have easily been exchanged for “10 Signs You’re A Normal Effing Human Being”.

Packed full of anomalies like ‘you need time to warm up in social situations’ and ‘you find people both intriguing and exhausting’, the article wraps up by reassuring the reader that ‘there is no wrong way to do introversion, it’s all about understanding your needs and honouring your own style’.

Has it ever occurred to people like this that perhaps not everybody has a style of

introversion because not everybody is or should strive to be a damn introvert? Why are we suddenly feeling this need to bend every unique personality into the shape of a special introvert snowflake? It might not seem all that important that the article wasn’t titled “10 Signs You’re A Hesitant Extrovert”, but the longer I think about it, the more telling it is.

Wikipedia) is admirable for sure, it leads to fully developed thinking and yes, possibly insight. But an extrovert who is more concerned with getting gratification from what’s outside one’s self (again, Wikipedia you beauty) could be just as insightful, and what’s more, likely to actually communicate their sudden insight rather than hugging it tight to their chests.

I don’t want this to read like an assault on introverts however. If you’re an introvert, someone who orients themselves and their lives mainly internally, that’s obviously fine.

It’s the romanticism of introversion that harbors potential dangers, like romanticism of anything so often does. Often, if romanticism swings things like reason, pros/ cons and realism scuttle out.

For example, coveting any type of trait communicates that that the inverse is undesirable. That is so counterproductive; we need extroverts and introverts equally to keep the world sane. Being predominantly concerned with one’s own mental life (one definition of introversion, thank you kindly

Has it ever occurred to people like this that perhaps not everybody has a style of introversion because not everybody is or should strive to be a damn introvert?

Romanticizing introversion also allows the trait to become an excuse (in some cases) for poor behavior. If your outgoing buddy, Jim, tells you he’d rather stay at home deep in thought than hang out with you like he promised, you’d be pissed right? It’s just

not like him. But when your self-confessed introvert compadre, Luke, tells you the same it’s all fine because he’s ~*like that*~.

Well I’m sorry, but all the term ‘introvert’ communicates is personal preference. The world doesn’t give a crap if you ~*prefer*~ to chill alone and eat pizza always, because sometimes you just have to suck things up and be a bit of an adult. You hate small talk with strangers? Cool, so do all of us, it’s just that sometimes it’s fucking polite.

People are complex, so much more complex than two ends of one personality continuum.

Some people are introverted and that’s sweet, some are extroverted and that’s sweet, and some just really don’t care. All have the capacity to be awesome; but they all also have the capacity to be assholes.

Ladies and gentleman, can we please just Netflix and chill with the whole romanticism stuff? It’s the kind of chill that introverts, extroverts and every damn kind of vert could get amongst.

NYFW

by Shivan

2016 came out with a bang for New York Fashion Week this year. One week where New York City actually stops to showcase its best street and runway fashion while the world watches on. Yeezus’ show was one of the most talked about this season, mostly by Yeezus himself. His big extravagant show at Madison Square Garden with 18 000 onlookers was one of the most expensive shows to date, which could explain the reason for Yeezus’ debt. Everything aside from his show was very consistent with his usual, nude colours and oversize silhouettes. This season, Rihanna’s Fenty x Puma collection was truly the well-deserved hype of fashion week. The mixture of gothic street style was something that definitely put Puma back on the fashion map. The use of white paint to style the hair with a dark gothic mix of makeup really enhanced the collection to a level street designers still haven’t obtained after three seasons.

Switching from street style to couture, designers like Delpozo and Marchesa stole the show with florals and crystals - going the complete opposite of what you would expect from an autumn collection. New York Fashion Week never disappoints. With a range of street mixed with couture, to formals mixed with florals, New York proved why it’s known as the art capital of the world. The stand out from the New York Fashion Week, for me, was surely the floral leather gloves showcased in the Delpozo show. The strong tailoring and lines paired with floral gloves really created a great juxtaposition.

The concrete jungle never disappoints in street fashion. Bloggers and celebrities outdo themselves each year to bring wearable art to the street of New York. This year oversize and layers were a major trend on the runway. Designers like Marc Jacobs layered various textures and textiles to create oversized looks. In the spirit of New York Fashion Week, we decided to hold an editorial of our own. Keeping in line with the autumn showcase in New York, we decided to dress our model in a vintage grey dress and a black ribbon choker.

Model | Genevieve from Unique Model Management Hair & Make-Up | Made by Ruth Clothes | Paper Bag Princess Photographed & Styled | Shivan (www.gathum.co.nz)

REVIEWS

P R I N CE Piano and Microphone Reviewed by Matthew Cattin

Upon purchasing a spur of the moment ticket to Prince, I immediately felt guilt. As the devastated super fans took to social media to cry tears of purple rain, it dawned on me just how hot my golden ticket was. Knowing a grand total of three Prince songs, I had the decency to feel ultimately lucky, privileged, guilty and excited all at once.

For the next few weeks, I listened to as much as I could, but with 40 albums to cover, I stuck to the classics and prayed he would crank his hits.

The atmosphere was like nothing I’ve experienced at a gig. An intimate sit in with a legend who has never visited our shores. This was a fucking huge deal.

The lady beside me burst out that she was “cunt-struck”, and while I don’t fully understand the logistics of her vivacious description, I imagine it was one of excitement, with a slight odour of clams.

With nought but a piano and his freakish vocal dynamics, he gave me full body shivers more than once. Purple Rain was up there with the best songs I’ve ever seen live, and Kiss, Nothing Compares 2 U and I Would Die 4 U had me genuinely spellbound. Come back soon my Prince.

VIK I C AFE 1C Rawhiti Road, Onehunga Reviewed by Ramina Rai

Tucked away in the depths of Onehunga is this tiny, tasty hidden gem. Viki serves up delicious, fresh and healthy Vietnamese food that packs a punch full of flavour. The menu offers plenty of classics such as Bánh mì (a Vietnamese sandwich), fresh summer rolls, and grilled meat skewers. My all time favourite is the Beef Pho – a gigantic bowl of delicious noodley broth, soft and tender beef that cooks in the heat of the soup, topped with coriander, mint, chilli, and bean sprouts. Wash down your meal with one of their freshly squeezed juices, then #treatyoself to their delectable desserts.

Looking back at my experience with The Danish Girl, I feel it is most accurately likened to a cup of tropical fruit tea. The scent it gives off is so tantalizingly delicious, but the taste is a mild let down – a tad sour, empty flavours, but enjoyable despite the unreached high expectations. Based loosely on the life of transgender pioneer, Lili Elbe, this film captured my anticipation twenty seconds into the trailer. I only wish it had managed to follow through and capture my heart as well.

Don’t get me wrong, the story was entertaining, the direction smooth, and the acting superb – Redmayne and Vikander are headed for big things, which is saying something considering their sizable achievements thus far. However, the film itself tended to drag on, and the points of focus throughout seemed odd choices to me. I longed to be inspired by both Elbe’s strength as well as her wife’s, yet my attention kept being forced on aspects of the characters and story that I had little to no interest in, and served no greater purpose beyond the moment in which they were showcased. I think it’s an important film to see given the history on which it’s based, I just wish it was a mustsee for reasons beyond its non-fictitious roots.

F R E S H M A N 2 016 Auckland | Reviewed by Cameron Barks

T HE DAN IS H GIRL Directed by Tom Hooper Starring Eddie Redmayne, Alicia Vikander, Amber Heard Reviewed by Laurien Barks

The Logan Campbell Centre blew up with one hell of a line up on February’s final Friday. Both students and non-students were buzzing, getting rowdy, and anticipating the show long before the artists took the stage. I’ve been amped for G Eazy for weeks now, and I’m stoked to report that he did not disappoint. While he was definitely the best part, David Dallas did a really awesome job at hyping everyone up before hand, so when G Easy hit the stage, he just had to maintain that hype.

And maintain he did! Jhene Aiko finished off the evening with a really nice calm and chill vibe that tied the entire night together perfectly. If I had any complaints, I’d say the rowdiness got a tad out of line, with guys trying to fight everyone around them, maybe a bigger venue could have helped out with that. But all in all, a great night out, particularly for the target group of freshmen, or freshmen-aged students, and something to get psyched about for next year!

RECIPE

DIY KOFTA BURGERS •

1 kg lamb mince

•

2 onion, coarsely grated

•

1 garlic bulb, broken into cloves and finely chopped or grated

•

6 tbsp garam masala

•

Bunch coriander, chopped

•

1 tbsp chilli sauce, plus extra to serve

•

To Serve:

•

8 pita bread

•

4 tomato, halved and sliced

•

Half a red cabbage, shredded

•

1 red onion, sliced

•

Small pot plain yogurt

cred: www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/7736/diy-kofta-burgers

Instructions Tip the mince into a large bowl with the other burger ingredients and a good pinch of salt. Mix it all together with your hands until completely blended. Pat the mix into 16 small burgers. They may be frozen up to a month, or chilled up to a day ahead.

To cook, heat grill to its highest setting and lay the burgers in a single layer on a baking tray. Grill on the highest shelf for 5-6 minutes on each side until browned and cooked through. Pile burgers onto a platter and serve with all the accompaniments so everyone can construct their own sandwich.

Hoverboard Telly Waterbomb Autotune Comix

Declutter Fap Handsy Hardship Photobomb

Ranga Sext Twerk Storyboarding Vaping

Earworm Lookbook Tweeting Stanky

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