KEEPING IT KOSHER

Start to finish: 35 minutes Servings: 8 Preference: Dairy Difficulty: Easy Occasion: Shavuot Diet: Vegetarian, pescatarian

1 cup flour 1 cup milk 4 eggs 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 tablespoon sugar 2 tablespoons oil

1 medium onion, diced 10 ounces mushrooms, sliced 1/2 pound cottage cheese 8 ounces shredded cheese 3/4 teaspoon salt Dash of paprika

Mix flour and milk until smooth. Add remaining ingredients, mixing well. Grease and preheat large skillet. Pour 2 to 3 tablespoons batter into skillet. When underside is set, turn over. Repeat with remaining batter.

Sauté onions and add mushrooms. Cook for 10 minutes.

Add rest of ingredients and mix well. Cook until cheese melts.

Fill blintz with 1 1/2 tablespoons filling and roll up. Serve warm with your favorite topping.

Source: Modified from Nitra Ladies Auxiliary recipe in “The Heimishe Kitchen” Nitra cookbook.

Three Jewish immigrants on a ship to America reach Ellis Island. They agree to reunite in 20 years to see how they all fared in the land of opportunity.

When they meet again, Silverman said, "When I arrived, I had no idea how I’d make a living. So I looked up Silvermans in the phone book and actually found a distant relative. He was in the silver business and he took me on. Now I have a house in the city and another in the mountains. Baruch Hashem, I can’t complain. How about you, Goldstein?"

"Believe it or not, same story. I found a relative in the gold business, worked hard … and became a partner. Today I live on the top floor of a building I own, and Baruch Hashem, my grandchildren don’t worry how they’ll pay for college. How about you, Taylor?"

"I too had no idea how I’d make a living. Despite my name, I never trained as a tailor and it sounded like a lot of work for not a lot of money. So I went to shul and prayed. I pleaded, God, if you make me a prosperous man, I promise to make you my partner.’”

"Nu? So what happened?"

"What do you mean, what happened? You never heard of Lord & Taylor?"

Source: Modified from Accidental Talmudist.

n. The nonsequential, somewhat nonsensical conversations of senior citizens with faulty hearing and short-term memory loss.

“I went over there for the gin rummy game and it was pure alter kockamamie from her: ‘What’s your name, you know, the one whose daughter, … somebody’s daughter. … Whew, somebody needs a shower. Or is that the soup?”

Source: Modified from “Schmegoogle: Yiddish Words for Modern Times” by Daniel Klein.