Poems by Dennis Martin

Poems by Dennis Martin

THINGS CHANGE

I always dreamed of this day A day when my life would be as normal as the people you see on TV A day when all the rain stops, and the sun come out and shines Shines the light of a new beginning on my life My new life How did this come about, you ask? It seems as if overnight, in dog years My new job makes me feel My new home makes me know My new friends show me how My old feelings disappear like a pair of old shoes They will not be worn again I will never put them back on again I never liked the way they fit anyway So happy now Yet and still waiting for reality to hit me again like a fist trying to knock me out But this time, unlike the first, I am better equipped to deal To deal with this new storm To deal with the way Things change FALLING BODIES

Sometimes I feel my body Falling Into a deep dark place A place I know all too well A place I said I don’t want to return to, but Yet and still I am ready To go there on Friday night My life Drinking, drugging, sexing with other Falling bodies My mind drifts As I get lifted Into this place I don’t like it any more But now I know And it is a big difference Once you know better Please don’t let my body Fall Not again I don’t want to be a part of the Falling bodies

I FEEL

WHY DO I GET HIGH?

Is it because you sold drugs all my life? If you were a math teacher, would I be one? My mom went to college. Maybe that’s why I am in college. But you taught me how to sell drugs. All my life I wanted to be a star. Is that why you are my father with panty-hoes and lipstick on? Why do you do this to my mother? She loves. I am like her. But the others are not. Why? Why did you do it? Why do I get high? And then want to cry? This is why I don’t know math or how to play baseball or basketball, let alone spell it. Parent—you have to pay rent to be one, right? Or are you just renting me for a little less than free? No one is perfect; I now see. Things are good, but can always be better I feel I need to be loved I want a family of my own But it looks like I am going to just be all alone I feel As if it’s only me sometimes Only me that has to fight Only me that has to pay Pay the price of a broken-down life Because of the choices I made When I was younger Now I am old and still paying Direct deposit seems like Always an empty account A negative balance With a positive viral load MOMENTS When I was young I wanted it to last forever It was necessary Necessary for me to stay In my own world Moments in time lost forever But why Why do I feel this moment won’t last? Lost in my mind Moments are scary Scary to me because Things can change in a blink of an eye In any moment, things can change Your life can change in a moment Moments are dangerous Dangerous moments The best moments The worst moments It’s so funny that life Can be over at any given Moment