ArtSpy Program - Artsci Musical 2023

P L A Y B I L L 2023Arts&ScienceMusical

ARTISTS’ STATEMENT

The first year of Arts and Science is such a dizzying experience. You are thrown into this mysterious, cult-like program, introduced to dozens of other nervous students whose endless accomplishments overshadow yours and then presented with course syllabi and extracurriculars and readings and parties, all while having no idea what exactly it is you are studying. In the midst of all this chaos, it is no surprise that so many students start to question if they even really belong in this program. However, if you are a first year reading this, do not feel pressured to overcome any such feelings, because, chances are, you never will.

Yup, strap in for around four (or even five) years of utter bafflement as to how you were ever allowed to enter this program. Did some fluky administrative error lead to you being wrongfully accepted?

And don’t worry, us writers are not just projecting our personal insecurities onto the faculty musical. We are projecting everybody’s

insecurities onto the faculty musical. From the moment we got together to create ArtSpy, we interviewed fellow students and reflected on our own journeys through this program as well as conversations we have had with our Arts and Science peers. ArtSpy wouldn’t have been possible without this support of our own wonderful Artsci community, so thank you so much to everyone who interviewed with us and helped us to develop the script.

Our research and reflections revealed that so many students, no matter their year, their background or their plans after graduation are convinced that they don’t deserve a spot in this program. Many people simply believe that they are not “Artsci” enough to be in this program, whatever that means….

This musical was also written over the summer of 2022, just as Dr. Wilson was handing over the position of program director to Dr. Marquis.

Considering the universality of these sentiments across the program combined with this change in directorship, we decided to focus on the story of Dr. Lu, a character whose seemingly impossible quest to fit in amongst Arts

and Science students is meant to reflect the journey of so many Artscis.

Along her journey, Dr. Lu meets a number of other people who are also trying to figure out how they fit in the Artsci community, from her Big Sib Sam to first years Ozzie, Lee and Angela. It was also important to us that this play also wasn’t just Dr. Lu’s story, but Artsci’s story, where everyone is doing everything in their power to fit in but still feeling helplessly out of place. We’ve put a lot of care and thought into each and every character and their stories, so hopefully there is someone on stage who you’re able to resonate with and you feel reflects your own journey, Artsci or not.

We are so, so excited to share ArtSpy with you all. We hope it helps you see that the program, despite being such a tight-knit community with a major reliance on tradition, is constantly transforming. No matter how cult-like Arts and Science may be, no student year will perfectly mirror another, just as no two directors nor two students will be the same. We believe that this dynamism makes Arts and Science both beautiful yet confusing, appealing yet intimidating, inviting yet challenging, and we hope that ArtSpy captures Arts and Science’s remarkable complexity while exploring why so many of us just can’t seem to feel “Artsci” enough.

BACKSTAGE CREW

SUMMARY

The newly chosen Arts & Science director, Dr. Lu, has just recieved her first task: to go undercover in the incoming first year class in order to gain a nuanced understanding of the students she’ll be supporting. ArtSpy follows Dr. Lu as she attends Welcome Week, classes, extracurricular events, parties—all the typical cult activities.

ArtSpy offers a peek into the early days of an Arts & Science student while also exploring the questions at the heart of the program and what it means to find your place in a community that is made up of fundamentally unique and different people.

DON'T FORGET: DETOX TOMORROW!!

knowledge / temptation / desire?

language? naming?

Good Morning McMaster Company

Who Are Artscis

Dr. Lu, Lee, Tay, Sam, Company

Lee's Ballad

Lee, Company

A Step Ahead

Angela, Company

Stuck in the Dark

Dr. Lu, Company

Spy Song

Dr. Park, Hector, Gino, Dr. Lu Nuance

Good Morning McMaster

Oh, oh, oh, woke up today

Feeling the way we always do

Oh we’re united by something

That you can’t touch but we know this much

That spirit of Mac is calling us back

Just like when Starbucks butchers your name

Oh, oh, oh pulling us out to the wings and the halls that we love

Good morning McMaster

Every day’s just a bit faster

Every night is a tale to tell

Every lunch Willie Dogs for sale

Good morning McMaster

This year we start our newest chapter

So the world’s gonna wake up and see

McMaster and me

Oh, oh, oh look at the geese

They sure want no peace with us today

Oh, oh, oh, we’ve got our laptops and bubble tea

Bring it on to me

The bugs in Centro

All wave hello

They seem to say students good luck to you

So oh oh oh don’t hold us back

Cause this year all our dreams will come true

Good morning McMaster

There’s the freshmen; hear their laughter

Some from joy while some more from nerves

Yet only success is what they deserve

Good morning McMaster

This year we start our newest chapter

So the world’s gonna wake up and see

McMaster and me

Some of us love arts

Some of us love STEM

Some of us love both and feel overwhelmed

We know that Welcome Week is starting so soon

So let’s get it started; let it rain Maroon! (let it rain Maroon!)

So oh, oh, oh, lets have some fun!

Cause when the party’s begun, our wings start to spread

Oh, oh, oh, something in Hamilton

Makes us feel like we’re made of steel

After years of Zoom we’re all ready to bloom

We’ve all been held back for far too long

So, oh, oh, oh don’t make us wait one more moment for the year to start

Good morning

Good morning

(Waiting for the year to start)

I love you McMaster

Every day’s just a bit faster

Every night is a tale to tell Every lunch Willie Dogs for sale

And we promise McMaster

This year we start our newest chapter

So the world’s gonna wake up and see

Gonna wake up and see

(Gonna wake up and see)

McMaster and me

(Yes, more or less we all agree)

McMaster and me

(Someday the world is gonna see)

McMaster and me!

Who Are Artscis

Frantic Cheerful

Many Artscis

My head’s full Students in a giddy whirl

All the different kinds

How do they all merge?

Some beam shyness

In a crowd I clench my fist

All Artscis seem so at ease

Why’s it I who freeze?

Is it just me?

Summer heat softens, leaves turning red

And the first years are coming in

I wait with impatience for my new friends

And the parties to start again

At odds, unlike I love uni

I miss home

I’m lost

Med school’s on my mind

So many Artscis

Who don’t align

What makes them bind?

New year, new bloom

I’ll never miss Zoom and gloom

Leaving my room now somehow feels awry

How will this year go?

I do not know

Who are Artscis?

Lee's Ballad

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Shit!

Why

Ever since high school

I have always been that outcast

The uncool?

Look, just wait a few years, everyone said

But when years went on

Nothing… Changed

Still the no name kid

Everyone forgets

A faded silhouette

In class

Try to stand my ground

I’d try to speak but could not make a sound

Now

Think I have a chance

In university I might advance And let Myself go free

In a circle of friends

Is where I hope to be

Held back by my tendencies

Why won’t they go ‘way

They’re socially comfortable

While I’m in disarray

Well, wait

The year’s just begun

My shyness is still here and leaves me stunned

So still

I’m that no name kid

But I’ll join that gc

And soon I’ll be free

Holy Shit

At the tea party

Holy shit

Maybe, just maybe Holy shit, watch them go I’ll thrive socially

Holy shit They’re going

Like for real Holy shit

A Step Ahead

Whenever I see something at which I must excel

And let’s face it, when mustn’t I go above and beyond?

My inner glow tends to start to grow

And when a task needs some perfection, you don’t even need to mention

I know what t’do as if I were a pro And even in this course

Though it’s the toughest course with no remorse

Don’t worry, ‘cuz I know I’ll succeed Watch as I proceed

And yes, indeed,

I. Will. Be.

A step ahead. I’ll be a step ahead.

I’ll be done memorising before you know a thing

Every little rule and law, oooh

I’ll be all done my first draft while you’re making gaffes

Everything that really counts to be A step ahead

I’ll always be a step ahead

Always top of my cohort

Yes I’m good at sports, really what else did you think?

I don’t intend on it but I make you think you stink

Don’t be discouraged by my great analysis

Hear me speak in class, I know you’ll feel paralysis

Now that calc is done and it’s time for POK

Regardless of the matter, there’s nobody wiser.

I’ll never not be A step ahead

I’ll always be A step ahead

While you begin Genesis I’ve finished the list Of books to read t’ill end of term

What, when?

There’s nothing that can stop me from winning it all agern, gain La la la la

You’re gonna be a step ahead

When she sees a worldly issue, which they must fix and commit to

She’ll approach it intelligently, just like a great Celebrated head of state with especially great communication

Does she miss a cello recital?

What do you think?

She was a step ahead

Please, it’s all about getting ahead

It’s all about aptitude and exactitude

So excuse me while I am

A couple hundred steps ahead like me

Well, this was certainly an interesting debut to our term. You seem like a…unique bunch. Let’s get started, shall we? Who knows a thing or two about Genesis? Ok what is going on?

I don’t know but I feel behind already. Even on the first day of class everyone…knows something that I don’t.

It seems like they know everything that we don’t. I do! It’s about deities and humanity I know theologically It explores the heavy idea of good and sins done evilly La la la la You’ll be a step ahead

Just not as quite as ahead as me!

Stuck in the Dark

I’m stuck in the dark

Despite all that I’m trying I just want to win

Now I start to spin I think of Artscis And have nothing to say No bound’ries to draw I start to withdraw

The program’s besting me Not how I thought it’d be I always persevere

Now I’m stuck right here

I was never stumped Thinking I got it made I figured this was it Things will never shift (Ahhh)

Getting comfortable (Ahhh)

Thinking I’d be on top (Ahhh)

That was all until (Ahhh)

I came ‘pon this hill (Ahhh)

This mission does not yield

I can’t define this field

Just when I have a break

I find a mistake

The program’s besting me (Besting me)

Not how I thought it’d be

(Thought it’d be)

I have no one to blame

(No one to blame)

Why should I complain?

(I can’t complain)

All these diff’rent groups

I see no end in sight

Who is this cohort?

All its many sorts

At 3038

They must know that I’ve failed

What is my defense?

My fault is immense.

I can’t categorize

All of the artscis

Soon everyone at Mac

Will hear of my slack

Now my reputation (Reputation)

Sees degradation (Degradation)

While my peers thrive in glee

(They thrive in glee)

This program’s besting me (Besting me)

I’m stuck in the dark

And this makes me feel lost

I don’t understand

How I’m s’posed to withstand

I must seek the light

To call for helping hands

My humility

Will be clear to see But you see

This program won’t best me

This program won’t best me

I have no one to blame (No one to blame)

So why do I complain?

(I can’t complain)

If my peers thrive in glee

(They thrive in glee)

Then this program can’t best me

(It can’t best me)

They thrive in glee

It can’t best me

They thrive in glee

It can’t best me

This program might best me

Spy Song

Please, Agent Lu, we are begging you

It’s been so long, and we have not heard from you

The detox is done

For quite some time

Please come in O Agent

The detox is over

Yet you’re not responding

Their silence has been prolonged

And we’re so worried

That the worst is guaranteed

And so we pray here

That soon our voices she will hear

And right now, our minds picture the worst ending

An agent is in the dark

Cause it’s not like her to so badly miss her mark

Is she swallowed by McKay?

Is she still in line for office hours

For an essay?

Hopefully, she will remember

3038 is waiting

And the detox is now over

So will she now hear the desperate radio calls?

Maybe she’s just curious

So passionate and drawn to all of Artsci

But unless she wants to compromise this task

Then she will need to give us a clue

Please, please come in

Oh dear, you’ve gone missing so suddenly

So why step out of line

And if you’re gone, we must replace you

You should stay out of trouble

And remember to be extremely careful Come in Come in!

Copy that, copy that!

Did you hear that?

Let’s just wait for the knock!

What’s. The. Code?

Dr. Lu!

Are you alright?

Boy am I glad to see you!

My silence has been prolonged

I am so worried

That my worst is guaranteed I cannot deny

There’s no defining the Artscis

And even if I put in heaps of effort

I’m just wasting energy

Now my task as I know it seems too heavy for me

Why’s your tail between your legs?

You’ve been at this job for only two weeks

You are not dead!

This task is sure not easy

But your timeframe has not ended

So skies ahead may not look breezy

But wait t’ill you’re sure that all is done and said

You must remain curious

Everyday you must ask a thousand questions

So unless you are a martyr listen up and we will teach you A thing or two

You, listen here

My dear, you’ll be stunned so severely

When you least expect it

So if you stop all the sudden

You should know all will be done

So remember to be very attentive

Please, please, take note of what we said and…

Don’t give up till the end

Don’t give up till the end

Please don’t stop you’re far too close

Your success will soon be grandiose

So don’t stop

So don't stop!

So don’t stop!!

Go, go, go, go

Go, go, go Go!

Don’t give up t’ill the end!

Nuance

Listen up class

What do we say when one looks

For a simple, rigid answer?

When they think in black and white?

‘Cause we know it’s gotta change

Your outlook, switch it up!

Yes, that’s right, change it up!

It’s time for new perspectives

No time for binaries

Say, hey world, you’re layered

And so am I, head to my feets

Head to my feets!

Bring some…

...nuance in …

Let some nuance show

Never let it go

Never let it go

Let your thinking grow

Bring some nuance in

Let it show, show, show

Try to move past the clichés (all the one-liners)

It’s not just left or right (Think again)

Try to read between the lines (Ooh, yeah, yeah yeah) And there you’ll find the light

Bring some nuance in Let some nuance show Never let it go Never let it go Let your thinking grow Bring some nuance in They might tell you to “wake up”

(wake up now, wake up now) And stop this foolishness (foolish kid foolish kid)

They’ll say look at the world

With some stone cold truthfulness (with some truthfulness)

Life’s not a chem exam (yeah yeah)

It can’t be boiled down (ooh)

To options A, B, or C (Ohhh)

Our world is more profound, Miss thing, you work it out!

Let some nuance in Let some nuance show

Never let it go

Never let it go

Let your thinking grow

Yes! Does it make more sense now? (oooooh)

Looking for new, creative answers to life’s arduous questions might seem like daydreaming, but those who refuse to break free from abstract restrictions are asleep. To be awake means to think newer, bigger, and better!

Never let it go!

Let your thinking grow!

Let it grow, don’t stop! Let it grow, don’t stop!

We’ve got magic

In our nuance

Who are they

To shut us down? (ohhhhh)

Everything that complicates life

Are the things that make life count

What’s complicated

(What’s complicated)

What’s complicated Makes life count

Let some nuance in Let some nuance show

Never let it go

Never let it go

Let your thinking grow (Yeah!)

Let some nuance show Show Show Grow Go

Life’s tricky, but inquiry

Has me ready for it! Go!

Let Me Be Me

I just did something unexpected Something bold, fearlessly

It's not what family predicted

But it's beautiful, and it's mine

It lets me be me!

Mix it up, mix it up

(That's me!) Mix it up, mix it up

(It lets me be me)

(That’s you!) Mix it up, mix it up (That’s us!) Mix it up, mix it up

I was once a masquerader With a disguise, that I despised

I was perfect, had a label

So much hid behind my bright eyes

I wasn’t me when I just did what I was told would make me stable

(You don’t like where you're going! Whoa!)

What could I do when I learned being stable made me unstable?

In my stability! I just couldn’t breathe!

A hurricane of all my passions!

Reading Kant!

Writing code!

We grab our shovels, and we build our own road

That’s my degree

It lets me be me!

Can I be who I am and loathe what I pursue?

Careful, that’s precarious; for you, it just won't do

I wanna feel the shiver of reading Hume!

I'm so sick of pretty, I want something true, don't you?

You just seem like your life's been a dream (Whoa) Since the moment you opened your eyes? (There’s so much that I want to know!)

All I know is there’s much I don’t know (Whoa)

But life’s too bleak without some surprise.

How far can we rise? Through the roof, to the skies, let's go!

A hurricane of all my passions!

Reading Kant!

Writing code!

We grab our shovels and we build our own road

That’s my degree (It lets! It lets!)

I wanna be where I am deeply, madly, truly in the moment!

Seize the moment, keep goin'

What can you do when you know who you wanna be isn't standard?

But I'll still be okay (Hey, everybody clear the way, whoo!)

Maybe I’ll lose my indecision (They’ll make a choice yeah!)

Possibly (Just maybe)

Maybe not (Change minds)

My way is brighter 'cause you're here, and you showed me what I can be

Let yourself be free! (Show 'em what I can be) Make your own degree! (And live cheerfully)

It lets me be me!

We're Artsci

I am not a stranger to the dark

I’ve been blind and lost

When this world’s a question mark

I’d start to feel astray in my own skin

In Artsci, I asked

How can anyone fit in?

But you students shined the light for me

There’s more than what the eye can see

It’s full of complexity

When the world says I know who you are

I’m gonna dance until I shake ‘em off

I am brave

I am bruised

We are us, now hear us cry

We’re Artsci!

Look out, ‘cause here I come (Look out, look out, look out)

And I’m marchin’ on to the beat I drum (I’m marchin’ to the beat I drum)

And I love what I love

There’s no need to justify

We’re Artsci

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh

Oh-oh

Bombarded by dilemmas every day (Heh)

But I’m not scared (Oh)

I am paired (Oh)

With a sib who shows the way (Heh heh)

We are forming bonds for years to come

And having tons of fun

In our overalls!

Since 1981

(Since 1981)

You students shined the light for me (Ahh)

There’s more than what the eye can see (Ahh)

Full of complexity

When I felt like I could not belong (Heh, heh, heh)

Other Artscis showed me I was wrong (Heh, heh)

Without flaws

I’m not me

We are us. Now hear us cry

We’re Artsci!

Make way for Dr. Lu (Heh, heh, heh)

‘Cause she’s overdue for her grand debut (Heh, heh)

And she knows all of us Are forever by her side

We’re Artsci!

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

oh-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh

Oh-oh

We’re Artsci!

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

And I know that I belong with you

(Whoa-oh-oh-oh)

(Whoa-oh-oh-oh)

There’s nothing that I can’t work through

(Whoa-oh-oh-oh)

Whoa-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh Oh-oh

When the world says I know who you are I’m gonna dance until I shake ‘em off I don’t need No disguise

We are us, now hear us cry

We’re Artsci

Make way for Dr. Lu

Heh, heh, heh

Make way for Dr. Lu!

Cause she’s overdue for her grand debut

Heh, Heh

Watch out for me! Watch out for me! (marchin’ on to the beat I drum)

And she knows all of us I'm not scared to be seen Are forever by her side I make no apologies

We’re Artsci!

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

(When the world says I know who you are)

Whoa-oh-oh-oh

(I’m gonna dance until I shake ‘em off)

Woah-oh-oh-oh

I’m gonna dance until Woah-oh-oh-oh

I’m gonna shake ‘em off

Whoa-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh

Whoa-oh-oh Oh-oh

We’re Artsci!

CREDITS

Special thanks to Dr. & Mrs. Samji and Dr. Papanastasiou for their generous donations!

Thank you to MacNeill Baptist Church for always being quick to offer us a rehearsal space!

Thank you to Samantha Potts for creating our beautiful show art and program cover!

Many thanks to our guest choreographers Tess Vosper, Evan Tyler, and Gabriella Pelosini!

The ArtSci Musical is a highly collaborative production and could not have been performed without our entire team! Thank you to Exec, Band, Cast, and Crew for always giving it your all!

March 24–25, 2023

Thank you for watching!