From getting it right, to being REAL. A guide to inclusive communication for executives

4 MINUTE READ

What to do when you hear or say something non-inclusive? Act R E A L

People are often overwhelmed when they hear non-inclusive language, often choosing to do nothing for fear of saying the wrong thing or getting involved in a challenging situation. Rather than avoiding discomfort, we suggest using a four-step process to support conversations about the impact of language.

These steps are: Recognizing, Exploring, Acknowledging, and Learning. Although the steps follow a linear sequence in a conversation, REAL is an ongoing process of education that requires repetition, hence the circular visualization of these steps.

Recognize and Regulate

Being intentional about recognizing the impact of language is the starting point for making change happen. After recognizing a negative comment, it is helpful to pause for a moment to regulate your internal state to choose a response rather than reacting. Without regulating our inner state, it can be too easy to avoid or deflect a conversation. Signaling what you have noticed might sound like this:

Empathize and Explore

It is most helpful to employ an empathic attitude to explore assumptions when seeking to understand a negative comment. Rather than calling a person out, which can create a culture of blame and shame, fostering curiosity is more conducive to exploration. For example, asking a colleague to explore in an empathic way may sound like this:

“I wondered what you mean by… would you be willing to share?”

Lead and Learn

Acknowledging that communication is complex and evolving requires a growth mindset, to be open to examine taken for granted assumptions. This epitomizes inclusive leadership that is open to learn. For example,

“Language is constantly evolving and it can be hard to keep up. Thanks for the conversation, it helps my commitment to being a more inclusive leader.”

Acknowledge differences and Accept impact

Acknowledging different perspectives is an opportunity to understand difference – and although you may not agree, it is a starting point for dialogue. Accepting that the impact of communication is true for someone else builds bridges of connection. For example,

“Thank you for explaining your perspective. I can see how this is your experience. To me, this word/image/ behavior has different associations.”