Discovery - February 2006

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# 21 February 2006

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Catholic magazine for families

A different life

how one man has seriously tried to make a difference - PAGE 12 Not someone else’s job

True body image

Mac or PC?

James Stenson’s message on parenting is quietly spreading. His insight into what’s important for successful fatherhood is here.

Want your child to grow up with a great body image? Here’s discovery’s surprising guide for the best way you can do it.

Technology writer Terence Boylen looks at the pros and cons of the big two in personal computers.

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Pages 7-10

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Contents Researchers have found that faith, widely dismissed in our society as ‘uncool’, helps couples build and sustain happy and stable marriages.

04 The missing shades of light and dark in a new movie about legendary singer Johnny Cash leave Paul Gray wondering

06 MARK REIDY surveys the way alarm bells are beginning to be rung more widely over the corporate world’s naked targeting of the young.

DEREK BOYLEN looks at ways parents can put the odds back in their favour.

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New mag chooses a unique approach ■

By Mark Reidy

A

magazine for teenage girls about to hit the world market aims to represent a truer image of femininity than those offered by existing publications.

True Girl is a faith-based magazine that will deal with relevant issues of fashion, beauty, dating, life skills, the latest movie, music and book offerings, as well as relationship and life advice, but will do so from a Catholic perspective.

It aims to help young women find their true selves rather than the often shallow and more empty role models offered by most contemporary women’s magazines. The True Girl website

Little girls sick of too many barbie dolls?

A culture of excess may be behind the rejection of the Barbie doll discovered by researchers from the University of Bath, England.

The academics were doing an indepth study of the role of brands among 7 to 11-year-old children when they discovered that many children hated their dolls and tortured them.

Methods of mutilation ranged from scalping to decapitation,

Discovery Catholic magazine for families EDITOR

JOURNALISTS

PETER ROSENGREN Letters to: cathrec@iinet.net.au

promotes itself as: “A Magazine that understands how to be stylish…. on a small budget, how to balance… school, work and friends, how to be true… to God and yourself, how to be cool… without following the crowd.”

The magazine is the brainchild of Brandi Lee and Stephanie Murphy who are overwhelmed by the anticipation that is surrounding their debut February/March edition.

“We are excited to have so much international interest. It’s really exceeded our expectations,” Murphy told discovery.

The US-based CNS news service reported that True Girl will target the 12-18 year old market and will feature stylish fashions that will be realistic to teen budgets, but won’t

burning, breaking and even microwaving. No other toy brand provoked such a negative response.

The researchers put this down to the proliferation of different types of the doll, which range from Fashion Barbie to Queen Elizabeth I Barbie and even a Geisha Barbie.

“The children never talked of one single, special Barbie,” said Dr Agnes Nairn.

“The girls almost always talked about having a box full of Barbies.

So to them Barbie has come to

reveal most of their bodies. The fashion focus will be on “healthy bodies and attractive, rather than

symbolise excess. Barbies are not special; they are disposable, and are thrown away and rejected.”

Dr Nairn added: “On a deeper level Barbie has become inanimate.

She has lost any individual warmth she might have possessed...

This may go some way towards explaining the violence and torture.”

More simply, the girls had probably grown out of Barbie since “the right age for having a Barbie now seems to be about 4”, said Dr Nairn.

- FamilyEdge

Community.

sexy, personal style”, Lee said. “We want to focus on educating and inspiring.”

Regular features will include a column providing advice on issues such as parents, relationships and school, as well as features on young single, married and religious women living their faith.

Beauty and dating advice will focus on “taking advantage of all God’s given us and how we can be examples to others,” Murphy and Lee told CNS. The first edition of the bimonthly magazine will be 24 pages, but will only incorporate one page of advertising, as the publishers want to develop a subscriber-based publication “thick with content”.

‘Cover girl’ on the premiere issue is 14-year-old Therese Hullinger, who is excited by the new publication.

“This is really a great thing for girls”`, she told the Northwest Indiana Catholic newspaper.

“It’s hard for us to be perfect like other magazines say we can be.

There’s so much pressure to be perfect and have everything.”

For more information and subscription details for True Girl see www.truegirlonline.com discovery has copies of the premiere February issue. To obtain a copy contact Carole on 9227 7080.

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Hold on, Idol is really quite good discovery journalist Mark Reidy took issue with an article we ran last year criticising TV’s Oz Idol ■

By Mark Reidy

A

ustralian Idol could be seen as a ray of light in the everdarkening world of reality television. In last year’s September issue of discovery, Melbourne journalist Paul Gray provided readers with his personal evaluation of the program - and he wasn’t very complimentary. In the days following a number of comments arrived at our office expressing obvious disagreement with his observations. Bravo to those who wrote, I’m on your side.

Over the past few years we have been exposed to increasingly depraved “Reality” programs that have encouraged deceit, selfishness, greed, revenge and immorality. The general premise of each has either

been, “How can I manipulate and deceive others to further myself?” or “How far am I willing to demean myself under the guise of entertainment?”

Such shows have served only to defile the dignity of both viewer and participant and have contributed little, if anything, to the elevation of the human spirit. So when a show such as Australian Idol comes our way, we should be enthused by the positive values and ideals that it does promote, rather than focusing on any shortcomings that may be perceived.

Our world is too often viewed from the ‘half empty’ perspective rather than the ‘half full’ one.

Australian Idol promotes optimism and hope. It encourages contestants to step outside their comfort zones and take a risk. It inspires them to have faith in their God-given gifts. It provides the opportunity for unknown talent to

rise from the shadows of obscurity into the spotlight of a nation. And, win or lose, each participant is given the opportunity to learn how to respond to adversity, which is the seedbed of character development.

For the viewer, it provides the excitement of potentially following an uncut diamond on the journey to its sparkling fulfilment. It is the chance to loyally support your favourite and to ride the highs and lows with them.

For parents, it can provide an opportunity to highlight to their children qualities such as courage, fairness, dignity, humility and sportsmanship. It can even allow them, if they are so inclined, to relate such values to the Christian messages of encouragement, hope, fulfilling one’s potential and choosing to act with love towards others no matter how one feels.

It is too easy in our world today to focus on the negative. Every

Runner up and winner of the first Australian Idol, Shannon Noll and Guy Sebastian.

Photo: AAP

time we turn on the television or open a newspaper it seems we are exposed to a gloomier side of life. As Christians we should be

leading the way in focusing on the positive in any given circumstance.

Australian Idol can provide that opportunity.

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February 2006

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Applicants must be fully supportive of and committed to the ethos and objectives of Catholic education.

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Faith helps marriage bloom Researchers have found evidence of a link between faith and happy marriage ■

By Mark Reidy

P

eople who have lived in a de facto relationship are more likely to experience greater insecurity and a lack of intimacy in their current relationship, according to Sydney Anglican researchers.

Presenting the paper, “Christian Spirituality and Relational Wellbeing”, at the University of NSW in November last year, co–author, Dr Andrew Cameron informed the audience that strong Christian belief, a monogamous partnering history and low levels of work/home conflict were key factors to healthier marriages.

The findings of Dr Cameron and his team were based on data gathered by the 2002-2003 Wellbeing and Security Survey, which was carried out by a team from Perth’s Edith Cowan University, the National Church Life Survey and Anglicare.

Dr Cameron’s team discovered

that, despite the growing number of those who co-habit (currently 30 per cent) they are more likely to be unfulfilled in their current relationship than their married counterparts.

Data from the survey indicated that 7.5% of married people doubted that their relationship will last compared to 21% of de factos and that 42.5% of those married said their partners treated them very well compared with 31.2% of those who were not. One in ten

people who had lived in a de facto relationship indicated that they had an indifferent marriage compared to one in twenty of those who had never experienced one.

“These findings are completely consistent with the theological predictions made at the outset”, Dr Cameron said, “and suggest that both ‘Bible-believing’ and ‘conservative’ Christianity… seems to actually enhance the health of a marriage.”

Continued on page 13

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Book Review

Other Stenson resources available Lifeline – The Religious Upbringing of Your Children. (163 pages) Faith and character do not spontaneously appear in children and must be formed from an early age.

It is the role of parents to nurture the transition from self-centredness to the formation of a moral conscience founded on God’s love. Stenson provides spiritual and practical guidelines as to how this is possible.

Preparing for Adolescence – A Planning Guide for Parents.

(68 pages) Adolescence does not have to be a time of trauma but can be one of the most interesting and satisfying periods of a family’s life if parents are willing to prepare for it from an early age.

Stenson provides insights and advice from successful parents he has observed as well as a compilation of the most common issues and conflicts that arise between teenagers and their parents.

Preparing for Peer Pressure – A Guide for Parents of Young Children. (55 pages) Many parents ignore or underestimate the magnitude of peer and societal influences on their children and consequently many enter adolescence with a character vacuum waiting to be filled. Stenson offers parents a set of principles designed to empower teenagers to resist the seductions of materialism and self – gratification that they will inevitably face.

CD Presentation by James Stenson – “Parental Unity.” (One hour talk with 20 minute Question/ Answer session) Stenson’s resolute call for parents to be united in all aspects of their relationship is the foundation stone for all his works. Children learn more from what they witness than what they are told. He explains how virtues such as generosity, forgiveness, faith, hope, charity and self-control can be ingrained in children when Dad and Mum are, “Number One in each other’s eyes.”

These and other resources are available from discovery’s Leederville office, tel. (08) 9227 7080 or via cathrec@iinet.net.au

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Not someone else’s job Successful Fathers The subtle but powerful ways fathers mould their children’s characters

By James Stenson Published by Scepter Publishers Available from The Record $7 plus postage, details below

“T

hey are so gorgeous when they’re babies that you just want to eat them,” a stranger once commented while admiring my daughter.

After a pause she then added “And then they grow up and you wish you had!”

Such seems to be the attitude of an increasing number of today’s parents, but educator and author James Stenson believes that the adolescent/parent relationship does not have to be a traumatic experience for familles.

In his book, Successful Fathers, Stenson outlines how fathers can powerfully mould their children’s characters to ensure they are given the best opportunity to develop into confident and responsible adults.

In a concise 71-page format, Stenson begins by acknowledging the lack of parenting information specifically for fathers, despite research indicating that they are a key factor in the increasingly troubled lives of young people.

The phenomenon of this generational breakdown was relatively unheard of prior to WWII; today it is western cultures that are most predominantly affected.

The virtues of faith, hope, charity, prudence, justice, fortitude and temperance are not being instilled into young children as they once

were; consequently adults of weak character are emerging in our societies - and becoming parents, says Stenson.

He emphasises that it is primarily the father’s responsibility to teach such virtues, as the Romans and Greeks called them, but he observes that over the past few generations

this role has been increasingly ignored, often unwittingly.

One important reason for the lapse stems from western society’s preoccupation with materialism and comfort and an unhealthy exposure to television and other electronic sources of information.

In contrast to past centuries

little is expected of children today other than the pursuit of all things recreational.

This unprecedented materialism has served to discourage selfreliance and responsibility and has increased the likelihood that they will remain consumers often into their 20’s.

The rise in mass electronic communications has not only contributed to diminished family interaction but has introduced powerful images, ideas, values and authority figures into the lives of children and adolescents.

With fathers spending less time with their children, Stenson warns of the danger of characters becoming moulded by “celebrities” and peers rather than the practical example of the father.

Stenson encourages minimal television time and more father/ child interaction where family history, viewpoints, opinions and the formation of virtues can be relayed to the next generation.

James Stenson’s message is one of hope. He believes that fathers can draw closer to their children as they approach adulthood, rather than expect the relationship to be one of constant conflict.

In his “12 commandments” for successful fathering, he presents the reader with suggestions on how to form and guide children in their character development as well as providing fathers with an opportunity for self-analysis.

He is adamant that a child’s earthly and eternal happiness depends significantly on their father’s influence and that most only have one chance to get it right.

Successful Fathers and other Stenson resources (see columnat left) are available from discovery (08) 9227 7080 or via cathrec@iinet.net.au

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The dark - and light - sides of Johnny Cash Walk the Line is the new movie about the life of Johnny Cash, the legendary country and western singer.

But Paul Gray wonders why it misses some important details ■

By Paul Gray

W

hen he died, Time magazine said that he knew all about the Ten Commandments because he’d broken every one of them.

Joaquin Phoenix in a scene from the movie “Walk the Line.”

They were talking about country and pop music legend Johnny Cash.

Walk the Line is the title of the new Hollywood movie about Johnny Cash’s life.

Johnny Cash’s trademark black clothes and mournful, poetic songs about prison and life on the wrong side of the tracks made him famous.

But the real man behind the pop music image has been more of a mystery, for most people.

This is where Walk the Line makes it mark. It tells the true story of Johnny Cash’s life, showing us how

the singer’s music was influenced by his run-ins with drugs (he became addicted to amphetamines in the 1960s), crime (he was once convicted of arson after burning down a state forest) and time in jail (he was incarcerated seven times, mostly for short periods).

To be sure, it was an action-packed life. Where the Hollywood version of Cash’s life gets it right is showing us how the singer managed to continue living, working and trying to do some good in the world, despite all the bad he’d done.

What cinema-goers won’t understand - because the Hollywood version of Cash’s life doesn’t include the story, in this movie - is the lifechanging incident in 1967 which led the legendary country singer to re-embrace the Christian faith of his childhood, and to remain in its embrace until the end of his life nearly four decades later.

Biographer Steve Beard, who contributed to the book Spiritual Journeys: How Faith has influenced 12 music icons, explains what happened to Cash.

Addicted to drugs and despairing of where his life was headed, the singer decided to commit suicide by crawling into a deep cave on the Tennessee River.

Beard took up the story when speaking to Rachael Kohn on ABC Radio National: “He (Cash) decided ‘OK, I’m climbing into this cave, I’ve got this flashlight and I’m crawling as far in as I can until the light goes out, then I will be surrounded in darkness and then I’m going to go ahead and just die there. Wait to die. And so he does...

“He crawls in this perilous cave that had all kinds of drops and holes, and he crawled until his flashlight ran out of batteries, and the lights went out, and there it was, pitch dark. Pure silence.

“And he says that at this point, he did not hear a voice from God or anything else like that, he knew that God was there, and that he felt the presence of God, the God that he knew as a child, and it gave him in that moment, the will to live again.”

It is one thing to regain the will to live, but another to be able to get out of a dark and perilous cave with no flashlight. Beard relates what happened next: “It was pitch dark, and he decided, ‘I’m getting out of this cave’. And anyway he goes crawling and crawling in this pitch dark, avoiding these huge caverns that would send him down to his death for sure, and lo and behold, he has this remarkable escape out of there.”

After this, Cash married his life’s partner, June Carter. It was with her help and the help of her longsuffering family that Cash was able to kick his drug addiction and continue working in the music industry.

Cash began going to church with his wife, and in 1971 made a more formal commitment to his faith. The fusion of the sin he had experienced and the Christian faith he now believed in can be traced all throughout the rest of his singing career.

In concert performances, Cash

often alternated songs about wrongdoing with songs on Gospel themes. He was undoubtedly, for most people, an entertainer, first and foremost.

But equally, there is no doubt that he was only able to entertain because of the formal, churchgoing Christian faith that lay, along with is marriage, at the centre of his life.

Why should Hollywood blush at telling a story like this?

Paul Gray writes for The Record and discovery from Melbourne

Back to the basics of reading?

A new British report condemns the way reading has been taught in schools, saying it leaves children to “ferret out on their own how the alphabetic code works”. It should be replaced by “phonics first and fast”, said Jim Rose, a former chief inspector of primary schools. Education Secretary Ruth Kelly accepted the report and says it will be implemented from September this year.

- FamilyEdge

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Theology of the Body

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A True Body Image World changing People - religious and not so religious - are waking up to something with the unlikely name of the theology of the body. It's revolutionary, it's radical and those who discover it are often amazed that this is what the Church really believes. In short, the theology of the body is a dramatic re-casting of the way we think - not just about our relationships but our identity as male and female as well.

It’s author, John Paul II, said that our identity as men and women is intimately connected with the deepest questions of the meaning of life and with nothing less than the nature of God. Here’s discovery’s guide for how parents can begin to introduce their children to what might become JPII’s greatest legacy yet...

PART II will appear in next week’s edition of The Record.

■

By Katrina Zeno

I

am constantly amazed at the sexualisation of our culture. I am not a “head-inthe-sand” Catholic, and yet, when I hear about mothers forcing their 14-year-old daughters to take birth control, “rainbow parties” and inebriated high school girls calling boys on mobile phones with seductive invitations, I pinch myself and discover I’m not dreaming.

The teenage Titanic is steaming ahead in one direction, and it’s bound for destruction.

Pope John Paul II, however, refused to stand on the bank of modern culture and helplessly wring his hands. Instead he gave the Catholic Church and, more importantly, modern young people and their parents the means to turn the Titanic around. It’s called the theology of the body.

If you’re unfamiliar with this term, don’t worry. Most of the world has yet to discover the greatest gift Pope John Paul II bequeathed to the world. While his globe-trotting presence and relentless witness to the Gospel inspired millions during his life, his philosophical and theological writings will shape the Church for centuries to come. In many ways, Pope

John Paul Ii is the Catholic Sir Isaac Newton, revolutionising the very way we think about ourselves and the world.

Overview of theology Theology of the body refers to a collection of 129 Wednesday audiences given by John Paul II in Rome from September 1979 to November 1984. Less than one year after being elected, this inventive Pope began using the Wednesday audiences to present a sixpart catechesis on the human person as made in the image and likeness of God.

“Our technological mind-set lumps the body right in there with computers and cars. The body is a mechanism to be used for selfpromotion, personal gratification and unbounded pleasure."

Through this painstaking process, Pope John Paul II presented what he called an “adequate anthropology.” Simply put, this means he painted the whole panorama of humanity from the time before original sin to

our glorified state in heaven and everything in between. He felt this was necessary in order to answer the deepest problem of our age: What does it mean to be a human person?

Pope John Paul II’s theology of the body can be summarised in one phrase: The body reveals God. To be made in God’s image and likeness as human persons means we need both a body and spirit to reveal God. We are not angelic persons who image God through pure intellect and will. Neither are we strictly animals who have a body but lack a rational soul.

Rather, we are embodied persons. This is what sets us apart from all of creation (which is why Adam experienced himself as alone).

Only human persons image God by being both body and spirit.

Gift of our bodies Why should this matter to youngsters, teens or parents? Because in our culture, surprisingly enough, it’s not the spirit that’s under attack, but the body.

Our technological mind-set lumps the body right in there with computers and cars. The body is a mechanism to be used for self-promotion, personal gratification and

unbounded pleasure. “It’s my body; I’ll do with it whatever I want” is the cultural food on which the present generation has cut its teeth.

In sharp contrast, Pope John Paul II’s theology of the body brings us back to the eternal truth of Jesus Christ, who said, “This is My body, given up for you.”

“‘It’s my body; I’ll do with it whatever I want’ is the cultural food on which the present generation has cut its teeth.”

The body is not our domain to dispose of however we want. The body is a gift from God to us, and it’s designed to be a gift from us to others.

The body is not made in the image and likeness of Mars or Venus (or Brad Pitt or Jessica Simpson), but of a Trinitarian God. Why is this a big deal? Does it really matter whether God is only One (Yahweh or Allah) or Three?

Let’s put the question another way: What’s the big deal between H20 and H202? They’re Continued over

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Theology of the Body

T

eaching young children all of the ins and outs of the theology of the body is not practical, but parents can start conveying the message that the body is a gift in many ways.

Here are five goals for parents of children ages 2-9:

• Weave language of selfgift into everyday life Remember the first time you told your children or grandchildren to “offer it up”? They probably looked at you like you were speaking Greek, but eventually it sunk in.

The same is true with the language of self-gift. It seems a bit strange to say to a 3-year-old, “Chris, I want you to make a gift of self to your sister by letting her play with the car first,” but as your children hear the language of self-gift over and over again, it will eventually click.

• Teach your children respect for difference These are the years when children squat and stare at an ant or wonder why God created people of different colours and eye shapes. Encourage their sense of wonder by squatting with them and saying, “Aren’t ants amazing?

Isn’t it wonderful how God made them?” Call their attention to the beauty of a sunset or the velvet touch of a rose petal with reference to God’s amazing design.

And when they enter the “why stage,” tell them, “Because God loves variety.” This helps them understand God as the Ultimate Designer.

• Teach them that all children are a gift When you see a new baby, say something such as, “Children are such a gift!” When you see a large

family, you can comment, “God is so amazing. Isn’t it great that He’s given the Pankus family eight children?”

When you tuck your children into bed at night, whisper in their ear: “You are one of the greatest gifts God has ever given to me” Why is this important? Because our children eventually will be surrounded by anti-child language.

As they encounter comments such as “We really don’t want any children” or “So-and-so was really a mistake,” they’re naturally going to wonder if they were a mistake.

When the question surfaces, seize the teachable moment: Pull out a gift and ask them if it’s a long-awaited gift or unexpected?

(Unexpected) Then ask, “Just because it’s an unexpected gift does that mean you don’t want it?”

(No, I want it.) Why? (Because it’s still a gift.)

• Enlist youngsters in moral boot camp The preschool and early school years are repetitive training in right and wrong. Just as we have to teach our children a zillion times to say “please” and “thank you,” we must persist in training them

in right and wrong. This involves impulse control and a spirit of sacrifice.

Training our young children in impulse control means teaching them how to handle spontaneous feelings. Helping our children direct these impulses in a constructive way lays the groundwork for selfmastery. It’s also the necessary complement to a spirit of sacrifice. Lent is the ideal time to re-emphasise this spirit. If our children have no impulse control, they will lack the ability to sacrifice and therefore to truly love.

• Protect from premature sexual information The years of innocence are the time for indirect sexual information, ideally presented through the pregnancy and birth of a sibling. Young children don’t have a right to all the information about marital union, conception and birth, but they do have a right to their innocence. If, however, they are exposed prematurely to sexual information, it’s our job to correct the information and give it simple, age-appropriate language that reflects God’s design.

- Katrina J. Zeno

Pope John Paul II’s collection of 129 general audiences, virtually the first major exercise of his time as Pope, presents a six-part catechesis on the human person.

It is this collection of talks which are known as the theology of the body.

Experts are beginning to believe that the theology of the body is so ‘big,’ so far-reaching that it is the prism through which all other theologies may come to be viewed.

His best-known biographer, George Weigel, thinks the rest of the world will be ‘unpacking’ JPII’s theology of the body for decades, if not hundreds of years to come.

In fact, you might call the theology of the body something like the Church’s equivalent of Einstein’s General Theory of Relativity - it’s that profound.

Humans have reflected since the beginning of history on the meaning of life. What JPII was effectively saying was that it’s all to do with our bodies, and in particular, our gender.

Part 1: Original humanity (the human person before original sin) Part 2: Fallen humanity (the human person after original sin subject to sin and then redeemed

by Christ) Part 3: Glorified humanity (the human person at the end of time) Part 4: The Applications: Virginity for the Sake of the Kingdom Part 5: The Applications: The Sacramentality of Marriage Part 6: The Applications: Reflections on Humanae Vitae (“Of Human Life”)

Our true image Continued from page 7

both hydrogen and oxygen. If you modify the interior structure a little bit, does it really matter?

Anyone who’s tried to drink H202 can tell you it matters. H20 (water) is the fount of life; H202 (hydrogen peroxide) can burn and kill you. It’s the difference between life and death. And the difference lies in the interior structure because the interior structure determines the properties and nature of the substance. The same is true of God. In His image The interior structure of God as Trinity is self-giving, life-giving love.

If God was only one, we’d have a solitude in heaven.

No exchange of love. No total self-giving among persons. No fruitfulness. In short, no communion

of persons. However, the interior structure of the Trinity demands something different.

We could say God is ‘3P0’: Three persons, one divine life. In the Trinity; there is total self-giving, total surrender, total unity and total fruitfulness.

This is the image in which we are made, and the image we are called to mirror on this earth in an embodied way.

For Pope John Paul II, it’s all about the body. That’s why it’s a theology of the body.

What we do with our bodies makes a difference, a radical difference, in the world. Either we reflect to the world a true image of God or a false image of God. We can indeed turn the Titanic around, but it will take our bodies to do it.

Katrina J. Zeno is a conference and retreat speaker and author of “Every Woman’s Journey.”

Sexuality Formation Guidelines Here are developmental stages taken from “The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality,” by the Pontifical Council on the Family: • Education in love by helping children learn how to direct their freedom, passions, impulses and feelings toward communion and friendship with God and others.

• Gradual education in what it means to be made in the image and likeness of God as male and female.

• Moral education that always includes the moral and spiritual dimension of human sexuality, freedom and choice.

• Personalised education tailored specifically to each child within the context of an ongoing dialogue and relationship between parent and child.

Page 9

Our gender reveals life’s meaning

Instill the idea of body as gift early Where it came from... and seize the ‘teachable moments’ for introducing children to theology of the body

disc covery February 2006

Theology of the Body

■

By Katrina J. Zeno

O

ne afternoon, my t h e n - t h i r d - g ra d e son, Michael, came home from school and began shooting Nerf basketballs in our living room.

I just happened to be indisposed in the bathroom at the time.

After awhile, he asked, “Mum, what’s a virgin?” After recovering from the shock, I casually responded, “Why do you ask?” Michael explained how a fifth-grader had asked him and another boy on the bus if they were virgins. Neither knew what it meant, so they split the bet: Michael said “no” and the other boy said “yes.”

My heart sank. This wasn’t the way I had planned for him to encounter virginity. My mind raced for where to go next. Then I got a wonderfully Catholic idea.

“Who do we call virgin?” I asked through the closed door.

“Mary!” came the enthusiastic reply.

“Exactly” I said. “And we call her virgin because she never had... “Oh gosh, did I really want to say it? Did I really want to tell my 9-year-old that Mary was a virgin because she never had sex? I felt trapped and unprepared.

With a sigh, I finished: “…because she never had sex.”

Michael’s blue eyes seemed puzzled. “Oh” he said, “I thought it meant someone had, so that’s why I said ‘no’” That day nine years ago taught me a very important lesson: We have to start teaching our children

More than just abstinence, chastity is the integration of body and spirit. It's not a widely known concept, often dismissed as impossible. That's one reason why you don't get to hear about it so much... very early about human sexuality.

Please notice I didn’t say we have to teach our children early about sex, but about human sexuality.

The mistake our culture makes is confusing sex with human sexuality.

Our culture wants us to think they’re the same thing, and they’re not.

Root of self-giving love Human sexuality is the truth of being a gendered human person, of being made in the image and likeness of God as masculine and feminine.

We image God not apart from our bodies, but through our bodies. And those bodies are beautifully crafted as male and female right down to our chromosomes. The Catechism of the Catholic Church says, “Sexuality affects all aspects of the human person in the unity of his body and soul” (No. 2332).

As a result, our masculinity and femininity, instead of being irrelevant to the spiritual life, reveal the meaning and purpose of life: to be a gift. The bodily structure of masculinity and femininity, which is to give and receive, reveals that we are made for relationships of self-giving love.

Pope John Paul II’s favourite word in the whole world seemed to be gift: Creation is a gift; the inner life of the Trinity is a gift; each person is a gift; we are created to be gift to each other. In his prolific writings, the Pope quoted one sentence

from the Second Vatican Council more than any other. The sentence from Gaudium et Spes (Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World) says, “Man cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself” (No. 24).

“Our masculinity and femininity, instead of being irrelevant to the spiritual life, reveal the meaning and purpose of life: to be a gift."

Once we tune ourselves to this language of self-gift, it pops up everywhere. The Catechism of the Catholic Church says, “Sexuality becomes personal and truly human when it is integrated into the relationship of one person to another, in the complete and lifelong mutual gift of a man and a woman” (No. 2337). At the Last Supper and in the Eucharistic prayer, we hear Jesus saying, “This is My body given up for you.” The Pontifical Council on the Family’s The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality says, “Human life acquires fullness when it becomes a self-gift” (No. 34).

Chastity education While professional educators want to convince us that our children need more sex education, the Catholic Church places ever

before us the non-negotiable need for more “gift education.” In fact, we have a familiar term for this gift education. We call it chastity education.

Until recent years, chastity education was really abstinence education. It focused on what you don’t do. As a result, chastity was frequently equated with celibacy (refraining from all physical and sexual intimacy) and therefore regarded as a state to be shed as quickly as possible after “I do”.

Chastity, however, is a virtue.

This means as we grow older we should become more chaste, not less chaste. Just as we aspire to become more patient, generous and charitable as the years fly by, so, too, we should aspire to grow more chaste, whether we are single, married or celibate. This calls for a radically expanded definition of chastity.

An ally in developing an expanded definition of chastity is The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality. The Pontifical Council on the Family waded through Pope John Paul II’s adequate anthropology to compile guidelines for human sexuality education within the family. Based on this document, here is a definition of chastity: Chastity is: (1) the integration of body and spirit, (2) so that we are free to give ourselves away, (3) according to our state in life and God’s design.

Unfortunately, because of original sin, we are born with a rupture between body and spirit. Rather than repressing the body or ignoring it, chastity seeks to befriend it and

re-establish the original harmony between body and spirit.

While this may seem abstract on paper, we recognise it immediately when we see it. Think of Mother Teresa of Calcutta. Think of the Continued over

Help them find their true selves

A

s young people aged 9 to 12 encounter more of the outside world, it is important that parents maintain a thriving family life. Here are four principles for the pre-adolescence years: ■ Keep your family as the central place of influence During the primary school years, our children encounter the world outside the home more through school, music and art lessons, sports and birthday parties. While this may occasionally concern us, we need to see this as God’s design for human and spiritual development. We are not isolated family units, but are created to live in communion and friendship with God and others. However, this doesn’t mean we abandon all boundaries and say “yes” to everything. On the contrary, even as our children branch out, we need to keep family life as their emotional, moral and spiritual anchor.

■ Expose your children to the moral choices and value differences they will confront

Cognitively, primary-school children are still in the black-and-white stage of moral development without the ability to think abstractly and project moral consequences.

This means they are not ready for multiple shades of gray. As parents, we must be vigilant about what our primary-schoolers watch, listen to and read so that it reinforces God’s design for marriage and family life, virtue and the dignity of each human person.

■ Create alternatives Pre-teens and teens have the special gift of badgering. They will constantly ask to see the latest movies, listen to the latest pop music, play the latest video games, and wear the latest fashions even if we’ve said “no” a hundred times before. Rather than eliminate all art and culture, the parental challenge is to create healthy alternatives.

Instead of secular music, take your children to a Christian bookstore and listen to some contemporary Christian musicians. Instead of regular television, consider alternative educational, travel and sports pay-TV channels. Try allowing only videos, limiting

TV time to a certain number of hours per week or having to accrue TV time by reading or doing chores. Computer and video game alternatives could include more educational or critical thinking games.

■ Don’t be afraid to say “no” Our children need healthy boundaries.

They don’t have to play four sports in the same year. They don’t have to go to the neighbours’ or attend a sleepover. The family and recreational habits you establish now will create the template for the more challenging teen years ahead.

- Katrina J. Zeno

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February 2006

Page 10

Theology of the Body

Teaching children an apprenticeship in becoming free Continued from page 9 Blessed Mother. Think of Pope John Paul II. In these inspiring lives, the body didn’t ignore or cast off the spirit, but radiated it. This is the virtue of chastity.

True freedom The result of this charismatic integration between body and spirit is freedom - true freedom. This authentic freedom allowed Pope John Paul II to stand at the altar and offer the holy sacrifice of the Mass even as his bodily strength declined and his speech slurred.

Yet, he determined to use his

freedom not to retire from selfgiving but to increase it.

The purpose of freedom, therefore, is self-giving. Or, as The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality says, “The whole meaning of true freedom... is thus directed toward self-giving in communion and friendship with God and others” (No. 8).

While chastity, indeed, includes the sexual gift of self, it is not restricted to it. Your 8-year-old son is called to chastity, as is your teenage daughter, and your widowed mother.

This is why the third part of

the definition of chastity explicitly states, “according to one’s state in life and God’s design.”

At every stage in life, we are all called to direct our freedom toward self-giving in communion and friendship with God and others.

Our freedom, however, is often like a kite that wants to ride the currents of “choice” without being tied down.

But a kite without a string crashes to the ground.

So, too, freedom without selfmastery self-destructs.

The Catechism summarises it this way: “Chastity includes an apprenticeship in self-mastery

which is a training in human freedom” (No. 2339).

The human path before us, which modern culture attempts to neutralise by claiming all choices are the same, is clearly cut. The Catechism says, “Either man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy” (No. 2339).

Chastity is ultimately about happiness because chastity is ultimately about love - a chaste love that freely chooses what is true, good and beautiful, even at the cost of laying down one’s life (or, more

likely, the daily struggle to refrain from pornography, abstain during the fertile period or date chastely).

Parents who train their children in chastity are endowing them with the greatest gift possible, the gift to love like God loves in the totality of their being, both body and spirit.

- Katrina Zeno is a speaker and author of Every Woman’s Journey.

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dolescence is a time of increased gender awareness. Here are three areas of education for young people ages 13 to 18:

1. Theology of the body: These are the years in which boys discover girls and girls discover boys. Rather than minimise the male/female attraction, harness it as God’s way of introducing your teens to His design as embodied persons (especially since they are suddenly aware of their bodies in a new way).

Sit down with a Bible and go over God’s design in Genesis 1 and 2.

• God made both male and female in His image and likeness (see Gn. 1:26-27).

• We are made of body and spirit (see Gn 2:7).

• Male and female are made for communion and friendship through a gift of self (see Gn. 2:24) God is not only one, but three, which means God is self-giving, life-giving love; a communion of persons. As male and female, we, too, are made to live in relationships of self-giving, life-giving love.

2. Marriage: Despite our best efforts, our teens are being swallowed up by a couples’ world. It’s what I call the “Friends” culture - you can sleep with whomever you want and still be “friends.” In this confusing milieu, we must recapture in our children’s hearts a sense of the sacredness of marriage and God’s design. Either we prepare our children for marriage or the world prepares them to be a couple.

The teenage years, characterised by increased responsibility and social relationships, provide the ideal opportunity to cultivate the qualities our children will need to sustain chaste, married love (or chaste, celibate love). Here are five of those qualities according

to the Pontifical Council on the Family’s The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality: • Chaste, married love is a total, complete and lifelong gift of man to woman and woman to man (No. 14).

• Chaste, married love does not end with the couple, but bursts forth into the world through the fruitfulness of children (No. 32).

• Chaste, married love cherishes the good of the spouse and family above its own desire for fleeting pleasure and comfort (Nos. 16 and 105).

• Chaste, married love is a source of grace to each spouse and a reflection of Christ's love for the Church (Nos. 29 and 30).

• Chaste, married love is only possible through the continuous illumination of the Holy Spirit (Nos. 21 and 74).

3. One-flesh union: After years of gift education, training your children in impulse control and a spirit of sacrifice, being vigilant about what they watch, read and listen to, and presenting God’s design for gender and marriage, it’s finally time to talk about marital union (aka sex).

The good news is you’re not starting from ground zero, but reinforcing everything you’ve been teaching for years. Here are six key points that can be presented in “the talk” or gradually woven into conversation: • God created man and woman for communion with each other not only spiritually but physically.

This special physical gift of self is what we call marital union.

• This union belongs only in marriage because it’s designed

by God to create a permanent, unbreakable bond between husband and wife.

• The marital union is holy because it makes the two one and through that oneness they can become co-creaters with God in

bringing new life into the world.

• The marital union is also holy because it reflects the love of the Trinity. In the Trinity, the Holy Spirit proceeds from the love of the Father and Son. So, too, in marriage, children proceed from the love of the husband and wife.

• Unfortunately, humans have figured out a way to make marriage sterile. In other words, to cut God out of the picture and prevent him from creating new life. This is what we call contraception because it goes against conception.

• This is a grave sin because we're telling God we don't like the way He designed the world; we don't like the way He designed marriage to reflect the Trinity by being life-giving, self-giving love.

As difficult as it is to talk about contraception, we can't shirk this responsibility.

After all, if they don't hear the beauty of the Catholic Church's teaching from us, they're certainly not going to pick it up in the football ground dressing room or on the night of the school ball.

- Katrina J. Zeno

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Given the choice, would you grab...

The Apple or the PC? W

e are all familiar with Christian kitsch paraphernalia bearing the slogan, “What Would Jesus Do?� – or ‘WWJD’. But when it comes to computers What Would Jesus Use? Mac or PC? Jesus was not conventional. He worked on Sundays and so on (John 5:8). So with Apple holding just five per cent of the market, Apple users are unconventional too.

I’m guessing Jesus would stop by the Apple Digilife.

On the other hand, if Jesus worked on Sundays it was probably because he kept getting Windows crashes, and the Blue Screen of Death. Perhaps he hadn’t heard of Apple’s slogan, computers that ‘just work’, leaving Sundays free.

The gospels are full of incidents of Jesus acting in ways that were considered socially inappropriate.

We know he was ostracised, and ultimately crucified for his teachings.

In contemporary times, we call conformity ‘political correctness’ and those who do not fit the mould, are non-PC. The general image is that the fruit that Eve gave to Adam was an apple. “You must not eat the fruit of that tree�, was what God had said to Eve. This is the first real command

Praise is the best classroom discipline: UK Study Praising pupils allows teachers to turn unruly classrooms into well-ordered ones, British research shows.

Jeremy Swinson of Liverpool John Moores University, one of those who conducted the study, said that his “Damascus momentâ€? came when he discovered that a notoriously difficult class in a Liverpool comprehensive school only behaved itself when it was treated well by the teacher of a creative design and technology class. “The teacher welcomed them into class and helped them take off their coats before putting on their brown overalls. He then went round praising them ‌ and over 50 minutes he praised the kids 78 times and told them off once.â€?

Dr Swinson has designed Four Essential Steps, a package to

God gave in the Bible so it must be important.

Jesus is forgiving, so he would not mind the occasional, nay, repetitious Windows crashes, but it’s still hard to imagine him going with the status quo.

Games are a huge part of home computing. Now, World of Warcraft will quite happily run on an Apple, but it is no secret that the vast majority of games run on Windows.

Can Apple be redeemed for its deficiency in gaming?

What it lacks in games it makes up for with the iPod. Just as Jesus raised Lazarus, Steve Jobs, with the iPod has raised Apple from the dead.

The iPod, now coupled with the Australian iTunes store is heaven for audiophiles.

Still, while the iPod may help on the way to and from work, it is not the same as sitting down after work and fraggin’ some zombies mumbling, “brains‌â€?

This could change in the near future. With Apple computers moving to Intel processors, there should be an increase in games that can be played on Macs too. Game developers should find it easier to port games to the Apple architecture help teachers avoid sanctions in the classroom by praising good behaviour and not just good work.

A study carried out at six schools and different age groups showed that, after training the teachers, praising rose, scolding fell and an average of 94 per cent of pupils were obedient. His four steps for tackling misbehaviour are: � Always make requirements absolutely clear – materials needed, permitted noise levels and seating arrangements. � Remember to look for the behaviour you want rather than the behaviour you do not want. � Acknowledge pupils frequently when they are doing what is required – but do not be too effusive and give private feedback, particularly to older pupils. � Change the frequency of the feedback – and remember that telling pupils off is wasted effort, unless they are told what behaviour - London Times, Jan 6 is expected.

provided they are written with the OpenGL API. This would even be beneficial for game houses. The limited number of hardware devices Apple supports means game developers have less compatibility issues.

Apple will no longer have to worry about every type of graphics card. And Apple displays just look better.

In fact, things are looking very good for Apple indeed. Microsoft has just agreed to support Office for Apple for another five years and the transition for other applications is set to be smooth with Apple’s emulation software, Rosetta, which allows Intel Apples to run non-Intel apps.

So what would Jesus use?

Probably Windows, but then

VS nobody really knows. Whole wars have been fought over less important topics. If the transition to Intel goes as predicted, Jesus will probably switch to an Apple. In terms of usability and style, Apple is the wine to Windows water (John 2:7 - 11).

Perhaps it is moot. It seems ‘Make Poverty History’ has superseded ‘WWJD’ paraphernalia anyway.

STOP THE PRESS As this story goes to print, a new iPod has been released. At $219 the 1Gb iPod Nano may just scrape Apple past the mark.

While still a little high for those living with a vow of poverty, these would make any habit trendy. With the introduction of the 1Gb nano Apple have cancelled the iPod shuffle line.

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February 2006

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BONO: ■

By Guiomar Barbi

W

hen he hit Wa s h i n g to n , Bono, attended various meetings and spoke at the National Prayer Breakfast, alongside President George W. Bush.

I was lucky enough to be a member of one audience as Bono, sporting sunglasses and a rosary around his neck, spoke about The Future in Front of Us: Living a More Involved Life. So what has Bono’s life been like up until now and how

can one person change the lives of so many others?

Bono, a nickname given to him as a teenager, was born Paul David Hewson on May 10, 1960 in Dublin, Ireland. The son of a Roman Catholic father and Protestant mother, he attended Mount Temple High School, Ireland’s first nondenominational school. In 1976, fellow students Dave Evans (aka The Edge), Larry Mullen Jr, and Adam Clayton formed a musical group now known as U2. Six years later, Bono married his high school sweetheart, Ali Stewart. The couple have four children, Jordan, Memphis Eve, Elijah Bob Patricius Guggi and John Abraham.

Live Aid Bono’s involvement in the fight for human rights began in 1985 when close friend Bob Geldof asked U2 to perform at the Live Aid concert in London. The event was organised in order to raise money for famine relief in Africa. They raised $245.4 million — approximately what Africa spends every few weeks paying debts to rich countries – and soon

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after, this cause would become one of Bono’s ardent passions in life.

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During this trip, Bono wrote the U2 trademark song, Where the Streets Have No Name, in under an hour on the back of an airplane sick bag while in Ethiopia. The lyrics help create a picture of the devastation he encountered on that trip but also provide the listener with hope by affirming his belief in heaven.

“I want to feel sunlight on my face; I see the dust clouds disappear without a trace. I want to take shelter from the poison rain where the streets have no name.”

As U2 became more and more popular, Bono used his massive recognition to draw attention to the crises of HIV/AIDS and poverty in Africa. He has worked tirelessly with the world’s most influential leaders and has enlisted the help of countless celebrities to educate the public on atrocities that are plaguing Africa and all Third World countries.

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Page 13

Meet a rock star who breaks the mould, using his global recognition to campaign for those without a voice, and in the process living a more involved life...

Cool mystery: Bono wears Rosary beads given to him by Pope John Paul II.

Debt, AIDS and trade In June 1999, Bono teamed up with Cardinal Oscar Andres Rodriguez Maradiaga at a G8 meeting to present a petition with nearly 20 million signatures demanding debt relief. In September of that same year, Bono met with Pope John Paul II as part of the Jubilee 2000 delegation. Formed in the spirit of the biblical teaching of the Jubilee, this was an international crusade which sought to forgive billions of dollars owed by Third World countries to the developed world.

Three years later, Bono joined forces with Bobby Shriver and partners from the Jubilee 2000 to form DATA (Debt, AIDS, Trade Africa). Their goal is to demonstrate that widespread HIV/AIDS due to lack of health and education, the encumbrance of debt, unjust trade policies, political corruption and religious persecution are human rights issues. As he stated in his speech, at the Washington Hilton,

“This is not about charity. This is about justice.”

In their most recent Vertigo Tour, U2 dedicate a segment of the show to educating the audience on human rights. The Universal Declaration of

Misery of hundreds of millions of children ‘invisible’ Hundreds of millions of children are suffering from severe exploitation and discrimination and have become virtually invisible to the world, says UNICEF in its annual State of the World’s Children report.

Millions of children disappear from view when trafficked or forced to work in domestic servitude.

Others, such as street children, live in plain sight but are excluded from fundamental services - such as healthcare and schooling and protections. “Meeting the

Human Rights is displayed on a screen and songs such as Love and Peace Or Else, Sunday Bloody Sunday, Bullet the Blue Sky and Miss Sarajevo are sung one after the other. DATA not only asks for help from wealthy nations, they also work with African leaders to ensure that democracy is being spread throughout the country. In essence, the point Bono is trying to drive home is that “we’re all made equal in the image of God”. If we truly believed in human equality, we would do everything in our power to stop the atrocities faced by these people in Africa. One of the most poignant quotes of the evening was, “Where you live in this world should not decide whether you live.”

While in DC Bono focused on The One Campaign, the idea that if 1% of the US budget went towards providing basic needs to Third World countries, it would be enough to improve the lives of future generations.

The One Campaign and DATA are fervently reaching out to faithbased organisations, including churches, mosques and temples, to gain support.

In 2002 Bono and DATA participated in a tour throughout the Heartland of America to raise awareness of the HIV/AIDS epidemic in Africa. He believes it is the responsibility of religious groups to become involved in putting an end to these issues.

Apparently, his call was answered.

Just last week it was reported that a chunk of money from President Bush’s $15 billion AIDS program is being given to church based groups

Millennium Development Goals depends on reaching vulnerable children throughout the developing world,” said UNICEF Executive Director Ann Veneman.

“There cannot be lasting progress if we continue to overlook the children most in need.” The report lists four categories of children most likely to be forgotten: ● Children who are not registered - over half of all births in the developing world (excluding China). ● Children without parental care - an estimated 143 million children in the developing world (1 in every 13) have suffered the death of

in order to prevent the spread of HIV, mostly in Africa.

Finding God in music What role does Bono’s faith play in his activism?

When asked this question at the Washington Hilton, Bono merely stated that faith is a private thing and should be kept between the person and God. In the past, however, Bono has not been secretive about his faith and has openly stated that he believes in God. In many ways, music was and still is a religion for Bono.

He found song lyrics to be prayers and has often stated that he finds God in music. While he does not associate with one specific religion, he told Rolling Stone recently that he believes in Christianity although he “doesn’t use the label, because it is so very hard to live up to”.

Bono identifies mostly with the evangelical movement due to people and groups he associated with as a boy. Tired of oscillating between Catholicism and Protestantism, Bono and some of his band mates, joined an evangelical group called Shalom which led Bono to study the Bible intensely.

As a result, references to scripture are scattered throughout U2’s lyrics.

In With or Without You the line, “See the thorn twist in your side”, refers to the passage, “To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.” And in more recent songs, such as Miracle Drug, the line “I was a stranger, you took me in” refers to the passage, “For I was

at least one parent, and tens of millins live on the streets. ● Children in adult roles - caught up in armed conflict, married before they turn 18, or working in hazardous conditions. ● Children who are exploited - some 8.4 million working in the worst forms of child labour, nearly 2 million in the commercial sex trade, millions of trafficked children, and domestic servants.

The report urges governments to step up efforts to reach these children, and outlines things that can be done by civil society.

- “Children Out of Sight, Out of Mind, Out of Reach,” UNICEF Press Release, Dec 14

hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in.”

His study of scripture has helped when approaching church leaders to help him in the fight against HIV/AIDS. By referring to bible passages and teachings, he reaches them intellectually and spiritually, and educates them on this form of modern day leprosy. They, in turn, are persuaded to turn to their communities and ask for help.

As U2 became more and more popular, Bono used his massive recognition to draw attention to the crises of HIV/AIDS and poverty in Africa. He has worked tirelessly with the world’s most influential leaders and has enlisted the help of countless celebrities to educate the public.

As someone who recently attended a U2 concert, I can affirm that music is his vocation and being a musician is the role he feels most comfortable in. Nothing compares to the energy felt in a stadium when Bono comes out on stage and starts singing the songs that have kept U2 at the top of the charts for nearly three decades. Bono has continuously stated that being a singer/songwriter is what he is good at and what he wants to do for the rest of his life. He is genuine and passionate about the work he does for Africa, but he is not giving up his “day job” to become a full-time activist or politician.

He has repeatedly stated that he would never want to be a politician although he has developed much more respect for them now that he has had to work with them so closely.

Bono uses his star power to educate his millions of admirers on the causes he believes in, and has recruited thousands of fans to join him in helping reform Africa.

As he said to the room filled with supporters, “We can save a continent.

We can change the world.”

One life can indeed change the lives of millions.

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February 2006

Page 14

Companies circle the youthful dollar Mark Reidy surveys the way alarm bells have been ringing over corporate targeting of the young

T

he sexuality of Australian children is being corporately hijacked, according to a Senior Lecturer at the Sunshine Coast University. Writing for the December, 2005 issue of parenting magazine, Perth’s Child, Dr Karen Brooks expressed deep concern for the thousands of sexualised representations of young people that are circulating within today’s society.

“Everything from fashion to friendships, food to fads, music to movies, uses images of pouting, posing sexualised young people,” she writes. While acknowledging that the sexual connotations are not always overt, she is adamant that the implicit intention of the marketing campaign is.

She believes that large corporations specifically, “hire groups of savvy, mid-twenties to thirties henchmen and women whose sole purpose it is to discover and invent trends.”

By equating sexiness with maturity they are able to exploit young people’s anxieties and develop them into a marketable commodity she says. Their role is to focus on the pre-adolescent sense of insecurity and desire to fit in and channel them for financial gain.

With advertising, movies, television and music videos increasingly relying on this psychological and emotional manipulation, children are being prematurely robbed of

Fear of death makes 50,000 Norwegians ill Norway is living up to its Scandinavian welfare state traditions in providing what is probably the world’s only dedicated clinic for hypochondriacs.

The clinic, located in the Deaconess Home Hospital in Bergen, specialises in what ails as many as 50,000 Norwegians, or 1 per cent of the population: imagined illnesses.

Through cognitive therapy Dr Ingvard Wilhelmsen tries to make patients realise and accept that their real problem is the anxiety they feel about their health.

“The underlying thing is that they have a demand not to die now,” says Dr Wilhelmsen.

One of his patients, a mother, says: “I’m very afraid of dying because of my children. I’m the most important person in their lives - I think that’s why I’m very concentrated on myself when I’m ill.”

But the doctor advises her and

their innocence.

Adolescent psychologist Dr Michael Carr-Gregg states that mass marketing and peer pressure are causing young people to feel more sophisticated and more able than they actually are. “They look like young adults”, he says, “but they don’t have the skills to match”.

Leading Australian parenting expert Michael Grose refers to this shrinking childhood as the “adolescent creep”.

Children are being pressured into adopting adult dress, language, behaviour and attitude at an increasingly young age.

“What was once reserved for adults only is now the preserve of children too.”

Children are being pressured into adopting adult dress, language, behaviour and attitude at an increasingly young age. “What was once reserved for adults only is now the preserve of children too”, Brooks says. Children are dressing in styles way beyond their years.

Mainstream department stores are selling bralettes and G-strings for ages two and up. Children’s clothes include short skirts and

others: “You have to accept that you are mortal, and don’t spend too much energy on controlling death.”

DrWilhelmsen says hypochondria is not just the imagined problems of a rich, modern nation. “The tendency not to be willing to die is something you find all over the world… In poorer countries they have the same health anxiety, but they don’t have the means to pursue it.”

School balls cancelled Two Catholic high schools on Long Island, New York, have cancelled their school balls for this year, citing a decadent “prom culture” involving great expense, drinking and sex.

The principals have received widespread support through the Web and the media.

“Strike up the orchestra for Brother Kenneth Hoagland, principal of Kellenberg Memorial High,” read an editorial in The Chicago Tribune welcoming a discussion about prom nights and

midriff exposing tops, available in leather, satin or leopard skin print. Children’s natural inclination to want to grow up quickly has meant that they have been eager to embrace the market identity that has been devised for them.

The more tragic element of this deception, however, is that parents are being persuaded to believe that allowing their children to dress in this way is harmless.

Brooks is adamant that they are complicit in the corporate manipulation by failing to protect them from it. She terms society’s acceptance of these sexualised images of under-aged boys and girls as “cultural paedophilia.”

Brooks also turns her attention to magazines such as Total Girl, Barbie and Girl Power, which she claims, are aimed at readers as young as eight. These are littered with stereotypical and often misguided ideas on how to ‘fit in’ through fashion, make up, hairstyles and language and also proffer advice on how to handle parents/boyfriends/girlfriends.

Melbourne journalist Christopher Bentick shares Brooks’ concern. In an article entitled, “What is your daughter reading?” in Melbourne’s The Age, in August last year, he explores the exploitive smorgasbord offered to the older female adolescent market. His research indicated that the main emphasis of the four market leaders, Cosmopolitan, Girlfriend, Dolly and Cleo was sex - “advice on how to do it,

What messages are young people getting from the media?

get it and have more of it.” His main concern was that children on the cusp of adolescence regularly read up, not down. That is, they will seek out information targeted for an older audience. This means that young girls are absorbing information designed for more cognitively advanced minds and physically mature bodies.

Bantick concluded that these magazines, “give highly suspect information, create misconceptions about sexuality, reinforce stereotypes about male and female behaviour

and show craven irresponsibility in their disregard for the emotional maturity of their readers.”

The insidious nature of the corporate campaign for profit has resulted in society passively accepting the destruction of child and teenage innocence. Through deception and stealth, words and images have been allowed to creep into our media and our psyches unchallenged. The time has come to reclaim the innocence.

What are your children reading and watching?

The faith-marriage link

“parents and educators who don’t do their jobs”.

Fines for swearing Two high schools in Hartford, Connecticut, have introduced fines for swearing in a last-ditch effort to get rid of obscene and threatening language - some of it directed at teachers. So far forty $103 fines have been issued at Hartford High and the atmosphere in the corridors is said to be less vulgar already. No parents have complained yet. In Illinois there is even a Swearing Control Academy dedicated to helping people stop swearing.

- FamilyEdge

Continued from page 4 Cameron’s team also concentrated their attention on the conflict between work and home life, which WSS results had indicated was another obstacle hindering many marriages.

The research showed that over 45% of workers surveyed ‘always’ or ‘often’ experienced conflict between their roles as workers and family members. Those mostly affected by tensions were contract workers, those working more than 50 hours a week and high income earners.

A concerning aspect of Dr Cameron’s study was that more than two thirds of those who experienced work/home conflict wanted to work more hours, not fewer. These people appeared to believe that putting more effort into their work was the only way to save their family life in the long term, even though it could harm their present relationship.

Project consultant Jeremy

Halcrow believes that the research uncovered a destructive “work-first” culture in Australia that was driven by the idolatry of consumerism.

“Our materialistic mindset makes us believe that if only we could work harder and earn more, we can buy our way out of our relationship struggles and into nirvana”, he said.

“The facts clearly present the tragic delusion of that fantasy… if we earned less and worked less, our lives would be relationally richer.”

Dr Cameron said that the primary motivation in bringing the WSS findings to the attention of the Australian public was the hope that those struggling in difficult, distant and broken relationships might be able to find the new life for their relationships that many Christians appear to be discovering.

He related his motivation to the words attributed to Sri Lankan DT Niles, “Christianity is one beggar telling another beggar where he found bread.”

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Page 15

the family is the future

Offsetting the manipulators’ lures

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With Derek Boylen

E

lijah and Isaiah, our four and two year olds are learning to read. They already know that a very big, yellow M means chips and that a very large, red and white striped bucket means chicken nuggets. I was somewhat mystified when I discovered this. They very rarely watch commercial television and we don’t eat exorbitant amounts of fast food. However, it makes sense when you consider that the average child is assaulted by approximately 3400 advertisements each day - and they aren’t “I love aeroplane jelly.”

Comparing children’s advertising today with the stuff we grew up with is like comparing beebe guns to ballistic missiles.

The arsenal of advertisers who market children’s products is wide and varied.

Once, children were dismissed because it was believed that they had little purchasing power, Mum and Dad were where the money was. Nowadays corporations realise that children often do have money.

If you can develop product loyalty in someone during their childhood they are more likely to remain loyal in adulthood. But, most importantly, children have a very powerful resource at their disposal – influence.

In 1998 three major companies

in the US conducted a marketing research project known as The Nag Factor.

The nag factor is that magical quality in a product or advertising which gets children to nag their parents. The effect of nagging on parents generates billions in gross domestic product each year.

Research has found that apprpoximately 25 per cent of visits to theme parks occur because of nagging and four in ten visits to fast food outlets, because of nagging.

Nagging accounts for between 20 and 40 per cent of purchases for children. The Nag Factor was designed to find out how corporations could help children, through their advertising, to nag their parents more effectively.

Comparing children’s advertising today with the stuff we grew up with is like comparing beebe guns to ballistic missiles.

If you think it’s just lolly and toy companies who utilise the power of the nagging child, you’re mistaken.

Nagging has been found to have an influence in the purchase of such diverse products as family holidays, computers and even cars.

Advertisers know all the tricks when it comes to getting your children to nag you. There is the rebel or independence quality in an advert.

Advertisers know that a key challenge for the transition from childhood to adulthood is the change from total dependence to independence. Children are naturally attracted to products that are marketed in such a way as to

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Downsizing of high schools can go too far What is the ideal size for a high school? The question has arisen because of the huge size of some American schools and the US $1billion promotion of small schools by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. Most new high schools enrol fewer than 500 students and advocates for small schools would like them to be around 300. But New York

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average child’s life they will spend a year and a half watching television advertising; the main messages being “Do it!” “Have fun!” “Do it now!” “Don’t compromise,” “Obey your thirst” and “Just do it!”

So how can we minimise advertising’s effect on our children?

Here are three suggestions. ● Restrict television time: The first most immediate thing we can do, especially for small children, is limit the amount of time they spend watching television.

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University education professor Diane Ravitch says that while high schools can be too big and anonymous, they can also “be too small to provide a solid curriculum and to offer advanced courses in mathematics and science and foreign languages”.

Ravitch says one study came up with an ideal size of 600 to 900 students. In this range academic performance peaked for both advantaged and disadvantage students.

- FamilyEdge

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make it seem to children that, by using them, they will be exercising some sort of rebelliousness.

Another common strategy that is becoming increasingly popular is the thirty-minute advertisement.

Keith Chapman, the creator of Bob the Builder, was recently interviewed and asked what was the motivation behind making Bob. His answer was “merchandising.”

The same principle is behind Pokemon and Keith Chapman’s newest creation, Fifi and the Flowertots.

The power that advertisers hold over children creates a problem for Catholic parents. Catholic parents want to help their children to avoid the lure of consumerism, not become products of it.

More than that, advertising often erodes the very values that we wish to instil in our children. It teaches them “I’m number one,” “What can you do for me?” “What have you done for me lately?” “Let me have it all,” “Let me go first,” “My toy cost more than yours; mine is better than yours.”

Research suggests that in the

If they can’t see it they can’t be swayed by it. ● Prefer commercial free television: It might be unrealistic for you to rule out television altogether, but you can make a point of encouraging the commercial-free stations. ● Talk to your children about advertising: With older children, make a point of discussing advertising with them; while they are watching television, billboards when driving and ads in magazines.

Ask them “What do you think this advertiser wants you to do?”

“How are they trying to get you to do it?” Help your children to become advertising smart. Turn it into a game.

Next time you are stuck in the supermarket aisle, a trolley full of food, Mary crying because she’s stubbed her toe and Johnny screaming for the chocolate that has been strategically placed at a child’s eye level you know who to blame.

Let’s help our children not to succumb to it.

Signature: ____________________________

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February 2006

Page 16

Transition Into Uni – Made Easy Embracing our community has always been top priority at Notre Dame and there is no greater demonstration of this than in the enrolment and orientation programs. These programs place special focus on easing new students into their new study careers. The Student Life Office provides a multitude of activities ranging from ‘how to’ sessions to social events such as tours and BBQ’s in which students can settle in and meet new friends, colleagues and teachers. This year has been particularly successful due to the participation of a fleet of ‘student ambassadors’. These helpers are current students of the university who are keen to support new students in settling into their new environment. Their enthusiasm and first hand knowledge is of great value to students just starting out.

Many of these ambassadors will join our schools liaison team and visit high schools throughout the year. They provide a short talk to year 12 students on their transition from school to university and their experiences at Notre Dame.

For more information on student ambassadors please contact the Prospective Student Office 9433 0533 or future@nd.edu.au

Open Day 2006

Testimonial

Sunday 13 August 10am to 4pm

My name is Bianca, I am 21 and in my second year of my Behavioural Science degree. I am currently the president of Psyche, which is the Behavioural Science student association. Prior to entering the University of Notre Dame, I lived in a country town and aspired to make a difference. I knew in my heart I wanted work within the mental health industry.

The day will be more interactive and filled with more activities than ever before! ❍

attend information sessions about courses and the Notre Dame admissions process

❍

participate in interactive demonstrations and workshops

❍

campus tours & BBQ

❍

PLUS a course expo with relevant University teaching staff available to discuss course details with individual students

Year 10,11 & 12 students:

A Day in the Life of a University Student Friday 14 July 2006 9am to 1pm As the name suggests, this event is an opportunity for year 10, 11 and 12 students to familiarise themselves with student life and take part in some of the activities that university students involve themselves in. Students will enrol, hear about the transition from school to uni, attend mini-lectures and finish the day off at a BBQ with members of the Notre Dame student and teaching community!

I came across Behavioural Science and it immediately appealed to me. Looking further into the university, I realised the admissions process was not only based on academic achievement but also involved an interview. I found this to be particularly alluring as it made me feel that I was entering into a university that does not see you as a number but as an individual.

The Behavioural Science degree has opened a broad range of future options for me. Not only has an Honours degree been created but also the course itself allows for extensive skill development in a range of areas. It is not a degree that focuses purely on textbooks but a degree that offers a significant practical component, builds a sense of community and develops you as an individual.

More details next DISCOVERY!

“

a degree that offers a significant practical component, builds a sense of community and develops you as an individual

Contact 1800 640 500 or future@nd.edu.au

“

Bianca Lavorgna Behavioural Science