NZH Plus November 2018

A New Zealand Herald Commercial Publication

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

GETTING SERIOUS ABOUT KIWISAVER

LIFE ON THE ROAD LEAVING THE 9-5 BEHIND

MEET A CLASSIC CAR COLLECTOR

INSIDE: WIN A YATES GARDENING HAMPER

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nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

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nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

+PLUSCONTENTS

What’s your financial future? p9

Home free p4

A four-wheeled tribute p8

Win with Yates

1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die p6-p7

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COVER STORY

nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

HOME FREE

Dumping the comfort of home and hitting the road isn’t such a hard thing to do in your 20s, but making the change later in life takes an adventurous spirit, writes Greg Fleming

“B

B King and Willie Nelson always had buses and, even as a kid, I thought that was cool,” Waiheke musician Aaron Carpenter tells me, as he navigates his new home — a 1967 Bedford bus he’s christened Lucy — (The Beatles’ Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds was released the same year) through the windy Waiheke roads.

He’s still getting the hang of operating Lucy’s 12 gears (he only recently acquired his HT licence) but everything else has run smoothly.

He’d been thinking of embarking on the troubadour life for a while but a recent health scare was the spur Carpenter needed to take the plunge and hit the road.

“Earlier this year I had a blood infection and it turned quite serious.

I had to go to hospital where they put me on really strong antibiotics. For a while there it was touch and go. I’m fine now, but that got me thinking — life is short and if ever I was going to do this thing, now was the time.”

And it’s worked out financially, too.

He saves over a $100 a week living this way (“rents here are crazy over the summer, or the landlord just kicks you out”) and his two kids love the new home when they visit.

And who wouldn’t? Carpenter can park up in Waiheke’s most picturesque spots and watch the sunset whenever he wants.

He spent last night alongside Onetangi Beach and may head to Rocky Bay tomorrow, then it’s a few days at a friend’s campground or where ever he fancies.

Carpenter found the bus one day while browsing Trade Me. Despite its age, the bus was in excellent condition, having spent the last few decades parked in a shed where it had been rebuilt by Dutch craftsman Nick Bossche and his wife.

Although he didn’t have quite enough to secure it at first, the owners liked Carpenter’s troubador spirit and a deal was eventually struck.

“She has an Isuzu motor 6db1 147 horses and cruises along at 90km and everything inside is run on solar and gas.”

Carpenter loves the freedom his

Aaron Carpenter (top and above) lives on a 1967 Bedford bus; Carl Rapson and Justine Forster (right) also prefer the Photos / Ted Baghurst; Supplied simpler life.

new lifestyle offers and plans to incorporate it into his music life, recently taking it over on the ferry ($600 dollars return) and parking at Vector Arena, when his band Aaron Carpenter and The Revelators played at Tuning Fork.

“Having a bus as a home has changed my way of looking at life,” he tells me.

“Although it’s early days, I’ve found we have way too much stuff. I came to Waiheke 15 years ago with just a guitar and backpack and I’m pretty much back to that again and it feels good. As a kid, my folks took us on amazing sailing adventures, which I still remember. This new off-grid lifestyle will create memories for years to come for my kids too. They will meet interesting people and see places they wouldn’t get to see. Life should be about adventures!”

He hopes Lucy will also prove musically inspirational — “forward movement at a slowish pace watching the landscape going by, you can’t help but be inspired to pick up a song or two”.

“As a musician and traveller, I’ve always had a little dream to do the

I’ve always felt happier when I’m moving from place to place. A home should not be an anchor, but a mast.

Aaron Carpenter

tour bus thing for comfort. I’ve had too many years of cramming gear and the band into little vans. This is way slower but also lots more fun. I’ve always felt happier when I’m moving from place to place. A home should not be an anchor, but a mast.”

Mid-life freedom That sentiment is shared by enterprising Auckland couple Carl Rapson and Justine Forster.

Forster had worked as an occupational therapist in South Auckland while Rapson had a high-pressure job as a senior project manager for Vodafone.

“After 10 years at Vodafone, I was fed up with being just a cog in the corporate wheel,” says Rapson.

“There was a round of redundancies and, although I was fine, it made me realise that these corporations don't really care for the individuals.

It was time for a change.”

So a few years back the couple began to make plans to live the life they really wanted.

They sold their house in Auckland and bought a motel — a stepping stone to their freewheeling life on the road.

He admits both were used to big upheavals as they had worked and travelled overseas for many years.

They ran the motel in Kerikeri for three years, with only one weekend off, and sold it, buying the tiny mobile home (the size of a small garage) they've christened “The Moog”.

“Tiny living is a philosophy and a way of life,” says Rapson.

“It’s not just about being crammed into as small a space as possible. In The Moog, when we are sitting in our lounge we can reach our stereo and TV without really moving, the fridge is only two steps away and the bathroom another two steps. Any more

space just becomes space in between, and we really don’t need it.”

He says they didn't want to wait until retirement to get out and do the things they love, such as kayaking and surfing. “We already feel the aches and pains of getting older and know this will only get worse.”

When I talked to them, they were on the shores of a lake in Rotorua with no one else in sight.

A couple of days later they were parked on a beautiful Coromandel beach watching the sunrise.

To finance this new lifestyle, they sell their artworks at markets and online, run a Patreon page and do a spot of motel minding — but Rapson admits it’s tough. “It’s a real balancing act to get just enough work to tide us over but not too much so that we end up stuck in one place for too long.

Most people don’t understand why we wouldn’t want to make as much money as we can, but we’ve been there and done that and we’re now seeking a better way of living.”

And last month the couple celebrated six months on the road.

“It’s been an incredible journey so far, and has more than exceeded our expectations,” says Rapson.

They’ve travelled thousands of kilometres, been to all corners of the North Island and met “heaps of really lovely people”.

“It’s not been all plain sailing though and there’s been a few lows to go with the highs, just like there would be in any walk of life, but the highs have far outweighed them.

“We love this lifestyle, and our freedom, and I can’t see us becoming house dwellers again, until ill health or old age catches up with us at least, so best we keep moving.”

And their advice for anyone contemplating a life on the road?

“You don't need to have a heap of money in the bank to do what we are doing — but we would recommend that anyone contemplating this lifestyle has at least six months of their planned monthly budget to tide them over until they can build up their income streams or find work.” ● On the web facebook.com/ acandtherevelators; lifeontheroadnz.com

nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

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BOOKS

nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

The 1001 album debate Greg Fleming wonders if these really are the 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die

David Bowie tops the list of albums for a single artist in the book (inset) — with nine.

Photo / Getty Images

Y

ou may quibble with the title — do I really need to hear Haircut 100’s Pelican West or Devandra Banhart’s Rejoicing in the Hands before my lights go out? (I did — and no I don’t). But then that’s what list books like this are all about — starting discussions not ending them.

1001 is released, like many of its ilk, just in time for Christmas and is sure to lead even the most fervent music fan to new discoveries (for me Ray Price’s 1962’s honky-tonk classic Night Life), reevaluations (pretty sure I can live without hearing another Led Zeppelin album), confirmations (Black Sabbath’s Paranoid is a masterpiece; The Notorious B.I.G was only getting started) and strange omissions (if, as it appears, this is a book based as much on popularity as artistic worth why do we get Robbie Williams but not Ed Sheeran?).

And while this updated door-stopper-sized 960-page edition finds room for littleknown 2018 album Microshift from British artist Hookworms, there’s

none for Vince Staples, Future or Pusha T and just one Kendrick Lamar record (2015’s To Pimp a Butterfly).

Indeed, the last 15 years here are

problematic: incredibly there’s no Adele, none of the big Black Keys’ records, no Pink, Lana del Rey, no The Hold Steady or sainted alt-country star Jason Isbell.

Instead we get Deerhunter, UK supergroup The Good, The Bad & The Queen and two too many Elvis

Costello records (Mighty Like a Rose and Brutal Youth, really?). Oh, and Bjork’s Vulnicura.

For the most part though, 1001 is dutifully predictable — all the usual Rock 101 standbys are here — Dylan, Springsteen, The Beatles, Leonard Cohen, Led Zeppelin, The Rolling

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nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

You won’t find Adele, Lana del Rey, or Bob Seger represented.

Photos / Supplied

contributors try (on Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust — “Bowie abruptly re-defined what being a male rock star was all about”).

The losers? Poor old Lou Reed gets just two solo albums (Transformer and Berlin), country legend Merle Haggard just one (I am a Lonesome Fugitive) and there’s nothing from heartland rocker Bob Seger, Yes fans will look in vain for the much lauded Topographic Oceans, while Godfather of Soul James Brown gets just one entry (Live at the Apollo). Lorde meanwhile sneaks in with 2017’s Melodrama, but not the smash debut — and

arguably stronger album — Pure Heroine (the only other New Zealand entry is Crowded House’s UK hit Woodface) while Australia, thanks no doubt to the many Aussie contributors, gets Nick Cave, The Triffids, The Go-Betweens, The Avalanches (look them up) and The Saints (for a great take on our album culture, readers should check out Nick Bollinger’s 100 Essential New Zealand Albums [2009], which must be due for an update!).

Meanwhile the 50s here are dispatched in a curt 20 pages. No Elmore James, Otis Rush or Buddy Guy, and Muddy Waters doesn’t get

an entry until the 60s’ Live At Newport.

Jazz gets the usual nods early on — Miles Davis, Duke Ellington, Coltrane — and then is pretty much forgotten. Got to make room for those Led Zeppelin albums, right?

But it’s good to see lesser-known artists and albums represented: Steve Earle’s Guitar Town gets a spot, as does underrated Chicago hip hopper Lupe Fiasco, Brian Eno’s 1978 album Music for Airports (which has assumed more importance with each passing decade), 60s garage rockers The Sonics, Joe Ely’s magnificent

Honky Tonk Masquerade, Curtis Mayfield’s There’s No Place Like America Today and The Gun Club’s The Fire of Love (the last three courtesy of exNew Zealand journo Garth Cartwright).

If there’s a weakness here, it’s the UK-centric leanings — especially from the 80s onwards — nice to see XTC represented twice (Skylarking and Apple Venus) but X-Ray Specs, OMD, The Waterboys, The Boo Radleys and, I remember quite liking Jah Wobble’s Rising Above Bedlam when it came out but haven’t thought of it since.

Maybe you had to be there.

Most troubling though, is that this edition doesn’t even mention music streaming.

The foreward by Rolling Stone founder Michael Lydon seems to have escaped the new-edition update and blathers on about “flipping through bins of LPs trying to decide which was worth my precious $2.99”.

Indeed 1001 already seems a rather quaint reminder of a time when albums had a cultural impact.

That’s long been supplanted by tracks and digital streaming and one wonders how long franchises like this can justify the trees felled when plenty of digital iterations are around.

Imagine looking back at this in 30 years’ time — will Prince, Bowie, even Dylan be as central to pop as they are today?

Critic Greil Marcus recently wrote that he played a university class full of pop culture aficionados Chuck Berry’s Maybelline and no-one knew who it was. None of my 14-year-old daughter’s friends know who Michael Jackson is. Anyone remember 1940’s superstar Bing Crosby?

Everyone will have their quibbles about some of the selections but there’s some amazing music here.

As Lou Reed says: “different people have peculiar tastes.”

Forget dusty record stores — the best way to consume this is with Spotify or Apple Music at hand.

Discover, discuss, delete and download. ● 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die, Editor Robert Dimery (Pier 9)

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nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

Neil Tolich’s car collection.

A four-wheeled tribute Ewan McDonald meets a man fuelling his passion

D

rive down the right-of-way between the shops in a North Shore neighbourhood — the fish’n chip place, the cafe, the antiques store — and in one of several anonymous breezeblock workshops is something far more tasty, far more collectable.

It’s Neil Tolich’s garage, where the retired businessman houses, preens, massages and tends to his cars. The massive Kennedy-era Lincoln Continental coupe; the Citroen DS19, so far ahead of its time that automotive designers are just starting to catch up; the Lamborghini Espada, all-Italian machismo; a scarlet Porsche convertible that James Dean would not have minded being seen in; a Jaguar E-type and a humble khaki Kiwi Trekka … and many more.

It’s not a museum; it’s a living and driving tribute to vehicles that Tolich respects, and loves. So what drives someone to scour the world for ageing cars, and to spend thousands on bringing them back to life and glory?

“To me, it’s not just about having cars; it’s about certain cars that meant something, really meant something to their design teams, who tried to make them into a piece of automotive art,” he says. “Some people see it as art, some people don’t. I do; I see them as real efforts to make them look beautiful, handsome or whatever term you want to use.

“Driving is the big part for me.

Some people collect cars and park them in a museum. They love looking

at them. These cars are driven all the time. Imagine how much fun it is to say, ‘Today, I’ll get in a Ford Cortina or a Buick Roadmaster station wagon or a Citroen DS’.

“Every one is different, and every one evokes for me what it would have been like in period. You never get a bad look when you’re driving an old car. It’s always a thumbs-up and a smile.

“I come in here and sit in the damn things, and just imagine who’s been in them before me, and what they did.

Some of these cars have done great things. Like that Buick Roadmaster station wagon. That has been around America twice with a family in it. You can imagine the fun and games that went on in that big tank, twice around America.

“There’s a joy in having these old cars, and if you luck out by getting good money when you sell them, then that’s a bonus. You shouldn’t buy them thinking you’re going to have a big investment. You might buy a car for $20,000 and you might sell it in five years’ time for $25,000, but you might have spent $50,000 on it in the process.

“Hell, you can buy a new car for $50,000 and in two years’ time it will be worth $5000, so you’ve still lost $45,000. Either way, you’re going to lose money.

“I landed this Porsche Speedster in 1986 for $22,000 and it was not running. It had been sitting for 17 years unused in a garage; the lady’s

husband had died in Venice, California. It was the first Speedster to come to New Zealand. We took it to the workshop, checked it out, put plugs and points in it, fresh fuel, did the brakes, and it fired up and has been running ever since.

“It’s in lovely condition, you’d probably get $US250,000 ($367,930) for it, and a concours [show condition] one is $US400,000. They’ve just gone through the roof, because Porsche collectors recognise them as being rare. There’s about 1500 of them, which is not a lot in car terms. It’s not like you’re buying something that’s going to be fragile and won’t work.

It runs like it’s being doing for the last 30-plus years. So, it’s just neat.

“To restore a 20ft-long American car costs a fortune. The metalwork is huge, and the paintwork is a lot; they’re so big. So, you either buy one in original condition or one that’s been done properly. Then you’ve got a lovely classic car that’s going to keep going for a while.

“Insurance is cheap because classic car owners are so careful with their cars. No one prangs their classic cars; they’re very careful with them and they do such low mileages, they’re not exposed to the rigours that modern cars are. So, to insure a $300,000 classic Porsche like that is $600-$700. If they’re kept in tune, running costs are reasonable. They’re serviced once a year. They’re simple; electrics, petrol and the wires and hoses and connector bits; if they’re all

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in good nick, they’ll work.

“So many of them aren’t looked after. People buy a lovely old car, and think, ‘great’. And, it will start to run a bit rough, but they don’t understand why it’s doing that, modern cars don’t.

All of a sudden it will start to falter, and they’ll park it and wonder why it won’t start three months later. Then they get disillusioned.

“The carbon footprint of the classic car is long gone. There’s a huge carbon-emission cost in building any new car, be it an electric car or fossil fuel car; in building them, then shipping them and all those sorts of things.

A well-tuned old car that you use once every two weeks is not so heavy on gas.

“Every two weeks they get a run up to Waiwera and back; 20-30km return. That means they start on the button every time; everything’s working perfectly. Each car probably is lucky to do 1000-2000km a year.

“When I talk about my cars, my wife Irena just rolls her eyes. I’m blessed because she’s happy to go for a ride in them. She doesn’t mind if the foot goes down occasionally for a bit of acceleration. She does let me play with my cars which is good.

“I’ve met a lot of friends over the last 30 years through the cars. When your kids are growing up, you meet a whole raft of new friends through having children at school. At work you have your friends too. But at our stage of life — grandparents — you make friends through your hobby.

“In my case, it’s my cars. Every car has a different group of people who are interested in it. There’s Porsche people, there’s Lambo people, there’s

Photos / Ted Baghurst

American car people. I met a guy at Smales Farm recently who’s got an identical Lincoln to mine; he’s had it 23 years. I didn’t know it was in Auckland. It doesn’t matter what walks of life you come from, if you’ve a Morris Marina or a Ferrari 250GTO, everybody’s on the same page when it comes to kicking tyres and looking at their cars.

“And also, the trickle-down business. These cars are being serviced and looked after by a huge number of people around the country, and they keep a lot of things going for not a lot of cost.

“I move my cars on. The criteria for me is, if I’m not using them, they go. I had a Ford Mustang race car which I loved, and I raced it for years, but that has gone to a friend who is a racer.

“I’m getting a new Ford Mustang this month, because I want a new performance car with a manual gearbox. The Bullitt Mustang is a nod of the cap to Steve McQueen when he did the movie Bullitt 50 years ago, the car chase in San Francisco. His Mustang in that movie was dark green, all the badges missing, so this Bullitt Mustang is dark green, and all the badges are missing.

“In 15-20 years’ time, I imagine some of these cars will still be wanted by certain characters, but some will just fade away and be parked at the side of the road or stay in garages.

“We’ve just got to keep these memories going. It’s like pieces of art; people hang their art up. We park these lovely cars, but we use them.

I’ve got to drive them, and if I’m not driving them I sell them.”

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nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

Pass go and collect KiwiSaver

What’s your financial future?

If you haven’t already, it’s time to get serious about your KiwiSaver. By Diana Clement

H

itting a half century in age is a real milestone for Kiwis’ finances.

It’s an age when many Kiwis panic about their financial future, says retirement commissioner Diane Maxwell. More so than when they actually hit 65.

“In the last 10 years before retirement, anxiety is high. We find that it is a really important time for people to get some good advice and make some good decisions.

“I get letters from people in their 50s and early 60s who realise time is running out. They are worried about doing the wrong things and sometimes they do nothing,” says Maxwell. “The stress makes them a rabbit in the head lights.”

“With KiwiSaver, logically you would pump as much money as you can in. Go for gold. Hell for leather.

Do a final sprint,” says Maxwell.

But for many people that might not be possible. “If it is possible, get aggressive with it.”

If you can afford it, this is a good moment to seek independent financial advice, says Maxwell. “Ask: ‘what should I be doing right now?’”

Paying down debt If you’re still paying a mortgage or other debt it can make financial sense to find ways to get that paid off as fast as possible and then divert the repayments to savings. But make sure you’re contributing to your KiwiSaver

person can continue to live in the style he or she is accustomed to.

With KiwiSaver, logically you would pump as much money as you can in. Go for gold. Hell for leather. Do a final sprint.

Diane Maxwell (pictured)

to qualify for the member tax credit and employer contributions.

The 50s is the decade when many Kiwis’ children fly the nest. That can mean expenses start to dwindle, which enables them to save more.

If expenses can’t be reduced there may be ways to make more money, such as renting the children’s empty rooms to international students or running a part-time business.

If you haven’t budgeted until now it might be worth using the extra time on your hands as an empty nester to create a formal budget. It’s not uncommon to find another 10 per cent

in the budget simply by tracking your spending and making it more efficient.

One big risk as you reach the final hurdle to retirement is losing an income through disability. It’s more common than many Kiwis realise. If illness strikes and you don’t have good income protection or trauma insurance your life savings could be drained by the time you reach the age of 65.

If you still have a mortgage or other debt and one partner earns a lot less than the other, it’s essential to have life insurance to ensure the surviving

Risky business As well as getting aggressive with savings, look at your risk tolerance and your KiwiSaver fund selection, says Maxwell. “Make sure you make some active decisions about what fund you are in and if it is the right fund for your risk settings.”

Often, Kiwis choose conservative funds because they fear volatility. If, however you’re not going to be withdrawing the money within the next five years it could be worth moving to a balanced KiwiSaver fund with investments in growth assets such as shares and bonds. Money invested in a conservative fund isn’t going to grow as fast.

“The issue is, you are probably in a conservative fund because you have convinced yourself you don’t want to take any risk. If you are healthy you may not need the money for 20 years,” says Maxwell.

Sometimes people in their 50s panic about their looming retirement.

It can be tempting to buy an investment property or business because it has worked for other people or they’ve been to a seminar. It can also lead to financial ruin and shouldn’t be done without good financial advice. There are opportunities to build wealth in your 50s, but if the returns look too good to be true, run a mile.

When KiwiSavers hit 65 they’re usually entitled to collect their savings — providing they’ve been a member for at least five years.

But not everyone does.

Often people feel anxious about what to do when they turn 65, says Maxwell. If you’re unlikely to be withdrawing it until your late 60s or early 70s it makes sense to have that money growing the meantime. Money kept in KiwiSaver can be drawn down in small or large sums when needed. It shouldn’t be difficult.

While many people withdraw their KiwiSaver in full and park the money in term deposits, that isn’t necessarily the best thing to do, says Maxwell. “Term deposit yields are really low,” she says. Do the sums. Unless you need the money now compare the returns and fees from your KiwiSaver to what a term deposit is paying.

If you’ve still got a mortgage and/or other debt, KiwiSaver can be used to pay that down — if the sums add up. Even if there are break fees, sometimes the psychological impact of paying down the debt with KiwiSaver and getting the monkey off your shoulders outweighs the costs, says Maxwell.

If you keep working beyond 65 ask your employer to keep paying KiwiSaver contributions, says Maxwell. Employers don’t have to but currently around 25 per cent of them do. That number is growing, says Maxwell.

“If your employer isn’t, rock up to them and say: ‘here’s the thing.

I am a valuable worker and I want you to continue making contributions’. Maybe they just need to be challenged on it,” says Maxwell.

Have a holiday There are too many retirees who won’t touch their savings under any circumstances. While your KiwiSaver money should last as long as you do, you’ve worked hard, points out Maxwell. “Do a deal with yourself and say take 25 per cent out (to spend on dreams, such as a holiday) and leave 75 per cent in keeping earning a return or whatever the deal with yourself is. I worry if people squirrel it all away they may not be fulfilling all the things they wanted to do.”

Finally, Maxwell says if your children or others want the money; pause to give yourself time to think about the request.

“Maybe say: ‘nothing will occur for six months while I think it through’. It is money you have worked for and you earned it.

Take time.”

Our unique investment model currently generates upwards of 6.25% in returns, paid out monthly.

If you’re looking for excellent returns** and a more flexible, transparent way to use your capital, investing in one of our mortgages could be the perfect move.

With a registered mortgage held over the borrower’s property, it’s ideal for higher value investments. Plus, the terms are flexible and the fees are zero.

We think it’s a great way to make your money work harder!

Phone 0800 00 58 43 www.southerncrosspartners.co.nz * Investment rate subject to change. Southern Cross Partners Ltd is a licenced Peer to Peer lender under the Financial Markets Conduct Act 2013. ** Based on our current rates and performance. To learn more about the risks associated with this type of investment, visit our website set out above.

D10

nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

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D11

nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

Straight to the pool room T

Paul Casserly

V began in NZ back in 1960, went colour in 1974 and went everywhere like a madwoman’s knitting in the 2000s, with channels up the wazoo.

As we head towards 2020 it can all seem a bit confusing, even for those of you with a full working cerebral cortex, undulled by bad genes or good weed.

Colour was the big moment in my lifetime and I can easily visualise the deep blue of the Commonwealth Games swimming pool that beamed up from Christchurch to Onehunga via a shop called Beggs Wisemans.

There I sat, plumply, staring at this mystical 20-inch wonder. Fast forward to our family getting a Phillips K9 Colour TV some 5 years later, (CHiPS was on) the arrival of the VHS player a few years after that, then the DVD and the last great peak, the MySky box.

Shit I loved that thing for good five or six years, now I curse it, its laggy unintuitive system, its rain fade, boo hoo, call the wambulance. The pace of change continues to lurch inexorably online even as I cling to a decadeold non-smart plasma screen.

Will the leap into a 55-inch 4k screen with all the apps and shitty sound feel enough for me, I wonder, as I feel the old familiar pull to buy some expensive electronics I don’t really need.

I’ve entered the end stage of my major purchase cycle, having a hawk eye on the prices as if it was the NZX top 50. I’m doomed to throw more money into that pit lined with about 10 TVs and a dozen things I’ve plugged in to them over the years.

And still, at the back of my mind, the fact that nothing has ever engaged me like Dr Who in black and white in 1975, or the 36 times I watched Pulp Fiction on VHS on a 14-inch back in the 90s.

Sure, Netflix, is great and mostly works fine, as does the local variant Lightbox. I pay for neither thanks to various deals with my phone and broadband, though I suspect Netflix would get my direct cash just by virtue of the scale of it’s offering, if I really had to.

But Lightbox is pretty damn good too, and probably worth the $12.99 for

TV show), Get It To Te Papa posits that our national museum has failed to represent the true taonga of Aotearoa, namely a rag-tag collection of kitsch icons and questionable memorabilia from the 80s and 90s, no doubt the formative years of the disturbingly dry host Hayden Donnell and his dishevelled director and on-screen sidekick, Jose Barbosa.

The installments, clocking in at around 20 minutes fair fly by, with their mix of goofy obsession and absurd diversions. As ever, the unexpected pleasures are things that are revealed about our history along the way and that ever-present question about who decides what really represents our culture anyway.

Their “mission” is to round up these items and somehow get them to the museum, who, I infer, were

. . . nothing has ever engaged me like Dr Who in black and white in 1975, or the 36 times I watched Pulp Fiction on VHS TV began in NZ back in 1960, went colour in 1974 (above); Hayden Donnell in Get it To Te Papa (left).

Photos / Getty Images; Supplied

the handful of superb shows that live within its digital curtains. It’s home to the most talked about thing I’ve never seen, The Handmaid’s Tale, and that much-loved, underrated gem, Better Call Saul, the spinoff that somehow

seems better than its originator, Breaking Bad. I realise the Handmaid’s Tale is an omission but I had a ‘life’s too short’ moment about half-way through episode one and have been unable to get past it. Like many things,

it’s on my list, that ever-growing dossier of shows, books, travel destinations and sexual positions that I will never get close to knocking off.

It haunts me that list. It says you will die and you will miss out on stuff and hints at the cruel pointlessness of everything in the universe.

Get It To Te Papa is not on that list as I have already sucked the marrow of this delightful morsel. It’s is the latest show on Lightbox and it’s a local commission, a first for the platform. Made by a couple of particularly bright sparks from The Spinoff website (and the spinoff Spinoff

to give as gifts or pass on to your local food bank. An overabundance of zucchini would make for a fun secret Santa gift.

There is one thing you won’t be able to ignore over this period and that is checking for pests and disease. As the weather warms up, the potential for problems increase and if you see an aphid one day as you are racing out to a party, the next time you look there could be hundreds. In the chaos, find a moment to cast your eye over the

garden and look for potential problems.

They are so much easier to deal with before they have a chance to establish.

Netting over vulnerable plants, such as protecting strawberries from birds and cabbages from the white butterfly will mean a pest or two less to worry about.

Beer traps are a festive way to ensure slugs and snails stay away from your plants. Bury an open container, about the size of a mar-

having absolutely nothing to do with this show and probably held several meetings about how to distance themselves from it. It’s not exactly a documentary or a comedy, though it hits both marks with ease. Fans of the work of David Farrier and Nathan Fielder should feel at home here.

So just what is Te Papa missing out on?

Naturally the list includes the dildo that was flung at Steven Joyce at Waitangi, complete with the obligatory re-enactment at the scene of the crime and an interview with the thrower.

The creepy animatronics from the Big Fresh supermarkets of the 90s get an outing, Suzanne Paul ends up in a display case, and there’s a rather surprising story surrounding the Deka sign in Huntly.

A televisual inorganic collection then? Yep, and that’s the beauty of it.

A

Sarah O’Neil

fter months of hard work getting the garden to a point where it is on the verge of a bountiful harvest, along comes some of the biggest distractions on the calendar.

The festive season: instead of sitting back and appreciating all our efforts and tending the garden with relaxing weeding and watering, before the full onslaught of the harvest demands our midsummer attention, we are diverted into the hectic social whirl that is Christmas.

If it hasn’t started already for you, it will soon will. Kids’ end-of-year parties, plays and prizegivings — all requiring the pre-requisite plate and possibly a costume.

Work commitments seem to make the most at this pre-Christmas build up and there will be parties for the staff and parties for the customers alongside tight deadlines and longer hours to make sure all is done before everyone goes away for the

holidays. It is a crazy month and one of the first things to feel the neglect is the garden.

Before things get too busy, take the time to give the garden a good thorough weed, ensuring nothing unwanted will grow out of control while you’re not looking. Do a quick check for tiny weeds every now and again that will be easy to nip out.

The garden will still need a good watering every other day to ensure it stays healthy; an irrigation system or even a soaker hose on a timer attached to the tap will take care of this task for you.

There will be early crops requiring a harvest, such as salad leaves, peas, strawberries and you may even have the start of the summer crops with zucchini, cucumbers and those first cherry tomatoes. If you need to take a plate, consider incorporating something from the garden.

Christmas is also the season for giving and if you find the harvest is already getting away from you, consider making up some food baskets

Photo / Getty Images

Gardening through the busy season

garine tub, so it is level with the soil and fill it with beer. Slugs and snails are drawn to the beer and will have a drunken end. Empty the container when full and replace the beer. ● Sarah O'Neil is an author, blogger and passionate gardener writing about the trials and tribulations of growing food for her family. Her books Play in the Garden and Growing Vegetables are available at bookstores. sarahthegardener.co.nz

D12

nzherald.co.nz | The New Zealand Herald | Tuesday, November 27, 2018

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