I am chaos and beauty Roebain Christians

penalty, which is arbitrary and unconstitutional.

The Indian government has filed an affidavit with the Delhi High Court, stating that “it must be assured properly that marital rape does not become an easy weapon for harassing spouses.” According to the affidavit, criminalising rape “may destabilise relationships and expose males to harassment by their spouses.”

Because of traditional and patriarchal customs, there is virtually little data on domestic abuse, including marital rape. Several nations, including Nepal, the United States, the United Kingdom, and South Africa, have made marital rape illegal, but the Indian government’s response has been exceedingly sexist and disrespectful. Because there may be cultural differences on the problem of marital rape, the Central Government has declared its desire to enlist “State Governments.”

CONCLUSION

The observations of the Court so far show a slight inclination towards a reading down of the said provision. Additionally, none of the submissions by the State so far have given any convincing quantifiable proof of any prospective damage that may accrue to the society. It is high time that this legal vacuum is settled for good.

Adv. Mohini Priya Noida, Uttra Pradesh

I am the mother of chaos and beauty, You can either love or hate me. I behold the mythology of the Greek gods, The book of Folktales you been told.

I am your oracle, you seek my guidance, At night you come to tell me all your dreams and secrets. I gave you my strength to be strong and bold, like a Taurus bull, Or cunning and deceiving, using my Scorpion sting.

Some of you are mesmerized by my beauty, I bring the Virgo out in you, to be complex and still lovely. As I sail over the seven seas, your curiosity, captured me, My Pisces personality watches you calmly, wishing we are like Gemini.

But because I am also chaos and not only bring hope, Libra judges you with her scales, And when I convicted you, Sagittarius released his arrow and gave you pain.

During the day I hide like a hermit Crab, away from your eyes, Not to see how my loneliness feel. But remember I will always be on your subconscious mind, Because I am the Constellations, you need me.

I am chaos and beauty

Roebain Christians Cape Town, Western Cape, South Africa

Real Life Story of an Activist with the Mission Samadhan

Journey with gender is almost 40 years and through all those years I see myself as a witness to my own journey. Gender is a word and gender is also something very crucial; you can say that in any country any Civilization and Society gender is integral part of Human Development. There was a time when there were no specific laws on Gender. We were only depending on CrPC (Criminal Procedure Code) and the normal civil laws only but any laws which specifically would have addressed gender were absent. And almost 20-25 years of my struggle and other women activists also fought for gender specific laws and then there was a total paradigm shift. You can say that the way people started looking at feminism began to gradually change and then came CEDAW convention in the early nineties; where India was also a signatory and that is the place and the junction, the point where India started looking at everything about gender with more sincerity or you can say meaningful way of dealing with gender.

Samadhan is a legally registered non-profit organization under Society Registration Act providing its services to the common women with its mission to ensuring direct and easy access upon Criminal Justice System. Our Mission Samadhan Women Legal Helpline & ‘ONE-STOP’ Rape Crisis Intervention Centre in Dehradun (shelter home for women survivors of violence) is a one of its kind organization not only in India but in the entire Asian Sub Continent. Some of the free services (pro bono for the rape victim) provided by Samadhan 24X7 Legal Helpline include: ‘ONE-STOP’ - 9 services under one roof – 1.Reporting, 2.Rescuing, 3.Legal & Psychological Counselling, 4.Legal Support, 5.Free Boarding, 6.Lodging, 7.Short Stay Rehabilitation, 8.Medical support, 9.Higher Professional Education (LLB & BL) program.

Some other features about Samadhan:

First ever Legal Mobile Clinic & Helpline for women ‘Justice on Wheels’ staffed by the women survivors of violence. Providing legal support to women from 122 Tahseels of rural hilly Uttarakhand, Samadhan reaches the needy women right on their door steps.

Samadhan’s pioneer landmark gender services :

1. First ever ‘one stop’ professional ‘legal helpline’ with 24x7 services to women victim of violence of all kinds – since last ‘20 years’. 2. First ever ‘one stop’ rape crisis intervention center with short& long term stay for survivors of sexual crimes – 9 services under one roof. 3. First ever gender resource center for legal empowerment & awareness for oppressed women from all over India. 4. First ever ‘mobile legal clinic’ fully equipped

with trained women para legal staff and student of law interning with samadhan – visiting more than 122 tahseels of north India. 5. First NGO to support SC/ST rape victim/ survivor to study law at mainstream university and college of her our choice with full confidentiality to protect her identity and personal data as rape survivor. 6. First NGO to help train the inmates to work with district legal services authority as para legal volunteers - and also proud to have by

NLSA. our inmates being awarded as ‘best para legal volunteer’ both national & state levels. 7. First ever NGO of uttarakhand to mobilize and empower the unorganized migrant laborers to get registered with labor office and procuring valid ID cards.

Free services at samadhan’s resource center -

1. 24x7 tele legal helpline by experienced lawyer. Helpline number: 09897757509 (domestic violence & sexual violence). 2. 24x7 - rescue – report - counselling. 3. 24x7 - short stay shelter with (free –boarding & lodging). 4. 24x7 - support line for psychological counselling. 5. 24x7 - residential facility with free short term vocational training workshops/camps for women. 6. 24x7 - free food & nutrition for abandoned senior citizen women. 7. Free weekly classes for poor women/girls for

PCS & IAS. 8. Free legal & family counselling for all. 9. Free training for para legal volunteers (field & court). 10. Free legal help for women survivors of violence. 11. Free mainstream legal professional education (LLB) program for under-privileged minority women from all over India. 12. Special legal counselling (pro-bono) support for landless women farmers of remote hilly villages of uttarakhand through legal mobile clinic since year 2004. All the Women Victims / Survivors who ever came to Samadhan helpline for legal help were empowered by effective counselling and they were motivated to fight for their justice with dignity – no need to fall prey to self-pity. Survivors of sexual violence are playing effective positive role in the society and Rural Panchayats as social leaders and also as mainstream legal professionals. Our Mission Samadhan made a long term impact on the rural women lives by their capacity building as social engineers at grass-root levels.

10,000 women victims / survivors of Domestic Violence were empowered legally to play a role model in their own community. 5,700 rape survivors successfully became law graduates and joined mainstream legal profession as lawyers/ advocates in various courts of law across the country.

Gender Violence would be controlled only when our women get their social and political stake equitably. Economic empowerment would be realized when women will have her 50% stake in political process of the nation. 50% seats in parliament and all the panchayats would be the solution. Judiciary also has to have 50% women as judges. A total democratic re-engineering would lead us to an inclusive gender empowerment; there is a long way to go but Samadhan is sure that one day we will reach our goal.

Break the silence to STOP the violence.

Adv. Renu D. Singh Samadhan, Dehradun, Uttrakhand

A Mother’s Failure

What is a house without a mother? It sounds very cheesy but there is so much wisdom and the truth is hidden in these simple sentences. A mother is the first connection to an unborn child. She connects with her baby while he or she is in her womb. They shared this special bond from what she eats, how she talks, and her emotions every day. How could a father compete with a special bond between the love of a mum and child? It is easy for a child to adapt to the loss of a father but not a mother.

I fail my children twice by being the strong loving mother they came to know before they were born. In 2010 I was diagnosed with stage 1 cancer. I had to go under surgery and recovered at home. This was also my first year of being a single, divorced mum. It was very hard on my kids at first. I did not want them to worry about my condition so I lied to them not telling them I was diagnosed with cancer. They thought I was just sick and depressed due to my divorced. They were still very young but were so mature for their age, helping me with chores at home. My son even learned how to cook. I realized then what beautiful kids I raised. At the end of 2010, I took them with me to a cancer rally. I told them the truth there only. They were so amazing hugging me and telling me what a brave mum they have. I decide there then never to lie to my kids again.

The second time I failed my kids was when I was so depressed because of the abuse I had to endure. For three months I suffered from insomnia and mild anorexia. I realized I was in danger when I fainted one morning, while my kids were sleeping. I woke up on the bathroom floor 2 hours later. That same day I decided to take control of my life. I book myself in a psychiatric clinic. Learn how to talk about my ordeal and how to fight back with my mind, soul, spirit, and body. I went for self-defence training and got the help of a dietician and bio kinetics expert. I had to stay for 3 weeks in the clinic but my kids could come to visit me every day.

They were very proud of me for sharing with them everything and having the courage to make a difference in our lives for the sake of peace, love, and serenity. With the help of my psychiatrist, the psychologist I was strong enough to kick my ex-husband to the curb who at that time was still living in my room, humiliating and abusing us.

Roebain Christians Cape Town, Western Cape, South Africa