Spotlight: Tayo Rockson

Communicator • Author • Change Agent

Welcome to Spotlight - a new feature of Among Worlds magazine. Our goal in the Spotlight column is to highlight Third Culture Kids in all ages and stages of life who are making a difference in the world. In this issue, we want to introduce you to Tayo Rockson.

I first met Tayo through an online conversation. His personality and positivity came through his online presence, and I was immediately convinced that this man would go places. We met in person in 2015 in Washington D.C. at a Families in Global Transition conference. The theme was Finding ‘Home’ Amidst Global Change. Tayo presented a powerful speech on How to use your difference to make a difference. Since that time, Tayo’s career and influence have spread exponentially. From Ted Talks to a book deal, he is a compelling communicator with a message for our time.

Among Worlds spoke with Tayo and asked him about his journey as well as how his third culture kid background has influenced that journey.

Tell us a bit about your growing up years, your family, and the places that shaped you?

"I had a pretty eventful childhood as I grew up in five countries and four continents. In addition to this, I spent the first nine years of my life living in and out of two military dictatorships. We moved around so much because my dad was a diplomat, so we would move every time he got posted out of the country. The five countries I grew up in are Nigeria, Sweden, Burkina Faso, Vietnam, and the United States. Nigeria has my heart. Sweden is where my middle brother was born. Burkina Faso is where my identity was formed. Vietnam exposed me to just how big our world is, and the United States always felt like an inevitable destination for me."

"Leadership and brotherhood were two principles drilled into me by my parents as I am the oldest of three boys. My parents wanted me to be able to set a good example for my siblings because they knew that they wouldn’t always be around given our unique schooling and life experiences."

What was a pivotal point for you when you realized what you wanted to do with your life?

"August 22, 2012. I was driving to work in my burgundy Toyota Camry like usual. I got to the point where the road merged into the highway, and I stepped on the accelerator pedal until I got to 60 mph, when suddenly, my lane was cut into half. A neighboring car had lost control, and as a result of that, I was swerving all over the place to get out of the way. In the process, I hit the left guardrail then one car, another car, the right guardrail, then another car and back to the left guardrail. This time the car lifted up, and I thought for certain I was going to flip over."

"At this moment, aged 22, as my life flashed before me, I only had one thought: “Have you done everything you said you were going to do in life?”

Have I done every- thing I said I was going to do in life?

"My survival instinct kicked in, and I slammed my brakes. I found a way to get out of the car in the middle of the road, and to my surprise, I was in one piece. My car was totaled, debris everywhere, and three cars all hit."

"But I was alive. I was in one piece."

"All of a sudden, I had clarity on what the meaningful things in life were for me. I decided then and there that I would now live life on my own terms and pursue my dreams. I quit my job shortly afterward and moved to New York City to figure out how to do just that."

"All that led me to helping individuals and institutions communicate effectively across cultures. I do so by being a diversity and inclusion consultant, speaker, writer, podcaster, and coach."

How has your background as a Third Culture Kid informed your work and your passion?

"It informed everything. Without the identity crisis I experienced growing up, as well as the incredible exposure I gained from living all over the world, I wouldn’t have realized just how deep the divisions are in our world. Being a Third Culture Kid helped me work my empathy and compassion muscles. Being able to see things from different perspectives helped me to create content in an intersectional and nuanced way."

Tell us more about your book - how did it come to be? What convinced you of the need for this book at this time?

"I wrote my book because I believe we need to learn how to cultivate relationships now more than ever. Today’s culture is defined by fear, uncertainty, intolerance, and reactiveness. It feels like a war zone sometimes because, in a world of nuance, we are governed by binary systems. In addition to this, we are losing faith in many of our foundational institutions (religion, education, government, family, the Internet, media). This isn’t just happening in some places. It’s happening all over the world."

"There simply isn’t any clarity on what we find threatening because we all feel things differently. Despite this, I’m filled with hope because we are also in the midst of an awakening of sorts. An awakening that allows us to see who we really are and where we can improve. The world has to awaken every now and then to the fact that we are responsible for the world we get. My objective with this book is to bring people who hold different beliefs together so they can get to know each other and create a path towards moral courage, empathy, compassion, and accountability."

"We live in an increasingly polarized world. What advice do you have for us in communicating beyond disagreements and differing world views?"

Educate. Don’t perpetuate. Instead, communicate.

"Education involves education of self and education of environment. We need to be able to acknowledge our biases, live our values, and recognize our triggers. The more we make these things daily habits we will be more observant and aware of the people we live around. We will start to make sure more people feel welcome and safe enough to be themselves."

"Don’t perpetuate involves understanding how perpetuating stereotypes goes beyond just saying racist jokes and microaggressions. It also has to do with the information we spread and the history we teach. Are we complicit in spreading disinformation and revising history."

"Communication involves committing to having an open dialogue with people who think differently from us. Doing this allows us to move from an ethnocentric worldview into greater understanding and a wider worldview."

What do you enjoy doing in your leisure time?

"I LOVE movies, sports, writing, and working out. My favorite sport is basketball followed by football (soccer) and tennis. I am also a voracious reader. I like to go through at least 100 books a year."

Lastly, any dates for book release, book tours, and how to purchase the book.

"The book comes out September 4th and is available anywhere books are sold. You can pre-order it here: https://www.amazon.com/ Use-Your-Difference-Make-Cross-Cultural/ dp/1119590698

"For upcoming events and book tours, head over to https://tayorockson.com/events as I will be updating the page with tour dates."