July 2023

July 2023

Volume 1 Issue 7

MAGAZINE

A Lifestyle Magazine Made for Everyone

Gateway to

BDSM Igniting Passion and

Imagination through

A Lesson in

Role-Play

BEST PRACTICES

FOR NON-MONOGOMY

live your life unapologetically

Preventing

Genital Stink during the summer

Featuring

Lady Haighze altlifemagazine.com

July 2023

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Volume 1 Issue 7

ALT LIFE

03

AltLife Behind the Scenes

14

Virgin White Couple

04

Discord Staff Spotlight

17

Gateway to BDSM

05

Preventing Genital Stink

20

A Lesson in Authenticity

06

Party Play Protocal

22

NCSF Best Practices for Non-monogamy

08

Defining Alt Life

24

ASN Award Nominations

09

The Ongoing Balancing Act

25

Swinger Society Events

11

Getting to Know our Cover ModelLadyHaighze

26

Why Alt Life Magazine

13

Woodhull Freedom Foundation: Progressive Policies

02

DAN & LACY THE SWING NATION

Contributors

BEHIND THE SCENES

JEFF & ERYNN SWINGER SOCIETY

NICOLE OPERATIONS

EDITORS

CHRISTINA

POPPUNKPINEAPPLE

JES

SUZI

CASEY

LAYOUT & DESIGN

CAT

JASON

03

Swinger Society Staff Spotlights

STAFF SPOTLIGHT OF THE MONTH

04

DR. ANGIE STOEHR, MD FACOG

Health and Wellness

l a t i n e g g n Preventi

STINK DURING SUMMER

Summer in Texas is the worst. It was, no joke, 103 degrees today in the Dallas area, not considering the humidity. Across the US, as temperatures rise, so does body odor. In the lifestyle, we’re pretty self-conscious about odor and VERY careful about genital odor. No one wants to give oral to someone who stinks. The big question is how to avoid genital odor when you’re sweating all day??

Genital odor is easier to control in penis owners. It’s probably a good thing, but penises and anuses really just need regular washing and soap to stay fresh and smelling decent enough. Any time you get sweaty gym, exercise, working in the garden, be sure to bathe afterward.

Vagina owners need to do a little more work to keep things smelling fresh down below. The first, and most important thing, is NOT to wash with soap inside the vulva and vagina. I’m not joking here, ladies.

Soap is COUNTERPRODUCTIVE for odor control on female-type genitalia. It alters our natural pH and can cause overgrowth of bacteria and fungi that cause unpleasant odors. You can use soap on your anus and the naturally hair bearing areas of the vulva, but NOT inside the lips. A good ole washcloth with water only can be used inside the lips after exercise etc…

Consider boric acid suppositories once or twice a week during the hottest months to maintain natural vaginal pH. If you want a little extra reduction in any odor that may develop between bath time and playtime, consider Lume or Mando. I have absolutely zero financial relationship to this company, but gosh I wish I did! Lume and Mando reduce body odors anywhere that might get stinky for up to 72 hours. I’m talking about places like armpits, feet, genitals, underboob, and butt cracks. This stuff is AMAZING. It was also developed by a gynecologist (Dr. Shannon Klingman) and is completely safe to use on the female style genitals.

05

Lifestyle

HOW TO PREPARE FOR A SWINGER EVENT There are a lot of things to think about before deciding to attend a swinger event and even after you have made the decision to go. That being said, a sex party can also become one of the most exhilarating nights of your life. Here are some things to know before attending your first sex party.

DO YOUR RESEARCH Take some time to research the specific event you're interested in. What are the details of this party? Where is it being held? How many people are anticipated? Themes? Dress code?

Who is organizing the event?

TALK TO THE ORGANIZERS Be sure to find out about any rules for the event. Don’t hesitate to reach out to the organizers directly. Is it meant for couples only?

Themed after a specific activity? Be mindful of how the organizers describe the event. Do they mention consent, safety, or etiquette? Are the rules clearly laid out? These kinds of questions will help you figure out whether or not you feel comfortable attending.

KNOW YOUR BOUNDARIES Perhaps the most important aspect of attending any kind of swinger event is getting and being very clear on your boundaries. You may want to think about: • The gender identities of the people you would feel comfortable playing with • Are you wanting to play with couples, singles, both?

• Any specific activities that are on or off the table for you and/or your partner (for example, getting spanked, giving or receiving a blowjob, etc.)

06

Lifestyle

PRACTICE SAYING NO Attending a sex party doesn’t mean you consent to any and all activity taking place. You might be invited to join in some activities that you’re not comfortable with or breach your boundaries. If saying no is in any way tricky for you, practice saying it beforehand. Try something polite like, “I’m very flattered by the invitation, but I’m not interested.”

LIMIT THE LIQUID COURAGE A drink to steady your nerves is fine but a lot of people end up getting way too intoxicated before or during sex parties. Not only do you need your full judgment to be sure you make safe decisions about what feels good for you at the moment, you don't want to end up drunk and passed out, missing all the fun right?

RESPECT OTHER PEOPLE'S BOUNDARIES Ask for consent for everything you do, and keep in mind that a lack of a response is NOT a “yes”.

You need to respect other people’s boundaries and the rules of the party. Before attending any sex party, make sure you're comfortable making specific requests like, “May I join you?” or “May I touch you?”. Practice saying the words out loud until they feel more natural.

ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR NERVES There’s no way around it; whether it's your first event or your 15th, you’re bound to be a little nervous! Give yourself permission to feel nervous or awkward. One of the best ways to get past your nerves is to talk to people at the party. Complement their outfit or Tell them it’s your first time. There are plenty of nice people who would be willing to show you around the venue, introduce you to others, or just chat to help you feel more comfortable.

TAKE BREAKS Sex parties can be overwhelming. Period. Plan to give yourself a few breaks to be alone and process your reactions. Duck into the bathroom for a few minutes to decompress. Check-in with yourself, and if you brought a partner/friend with you, plan check-ins with them as well.

SWING SAFE If you do decide to join in on the fun, remember to always gain consent and practice safe sex.

Coming prepared with your own condoms, lube, or other contraceptives is always smart.

You can also check with the event organizers about their safety policies and see if they provide safe sex supplies.

remember to always

gain consent and practice

safe sex

07

TN_Gal_Nicole joins ALT Life as editorial operations, and is passionate about ENM education

08

Lifestyle Definitions

Defining

Lifestyle

MRS*SAMOAN

THE ONGOING

Balancing Act Balancing life is always a work in progress.

From emotions to finances and time management, life is quite literally an ongoing balancing act. There is always a task that needs prioritizing. I’ve found time management is one of the key factors in finding a solution to the ongoing clash of priorities.

My relationship with time management has been less than stellar. A year or two ago, I was diagnosed with ADHD with OCD tendencies. At first, it was hard for me to grasp “being different.” After the phase of denial (and much research), the diagnosis helped me come to the realization that ADHD was the reason I had been struggling. I struggled to remember my depression medication at times and I constantly felt like I was being dragged in a million different directions with no resolution.

My brain moved so fast that there was never a moment of quiet for sitting and planning upcoming activities or expenses.

Therapy and medication have helped, but I still have to work hard at it every day! I’ve had to lower my expectations for myself because the truth is neurodivergent individuals have different boundaries and levels of emotional tolerance for social activities. Along with limiting my social interactions to what my body felt was a good level, I also have taken some time management classes.

There have been a few online courses on LinkedIn and Coursera that have helped me gain control over my professional and personal time management skills. Keeping track of events and finances on an agenda AND calendar (both daily and monthly) have proved to be the most useful tools to me. Like they say, out of sight, out of mind! If I didn’t see the priorities and/or responsibilities on a to-do list, I felt overwhelmed (to a crippling degree). These feelings are also things that have to be a priority.

09

Lifestyle

Since I began listening to my body and mind, I’ve learned it’s crucial to allow children to see their parents experience all emotions. I used to think shielding my kids from my big emotions was protecting them. Now I believe that showing my children that we have big emotions too, and how we navigate through those feelings actually helps them with their coping skills!

I never realized how emotionally dysregulated I was until I had kids. I had to be better for them and for me! Prioritizing my coping skills, selfcare, and validating my emotions has helped me through my bouts of depression and anxiety as well as my overall mental health. If I hadn’t decided to allow myself to feel these emotions and prioritize healing, who knows how stunted my personal growth would have been? My personal growth journey has been a wild ride, but I wouldn’t change it if I could go back.

On this journey, I’ve been yearning to find myself. When it comes to sexual orientation, self-expression, and career, I had no idea where I was or rather who I was. There have been many obstacles, including finances. My time management skills have helped with finances as much as they can. Figuring out what I wanted to do for a career was not an easy road to go down. After switching jobs for an option that was better for my family and caused less stress on me, I experienced poverty, went hungry to feed my kids, and wondered where our next meal was coming from.

Our community has been nothing but supportive and generous during this time, which we are thankful for. While the transition into this new job has been immensely difficult, it’s coming together now, and financial stability is becoming more feasible. Although it is seemingly getting better, budgeting money and making sure that I can provide the necessary resources for my family is a priority every day. So while I’m prioritizing my feelings and my family, I’m also constantly thinking about our future and how I can provide more for them.

Time management skills are a blessing in disguise at times, but in order to get ahead in the balancing act of life, you must endure some of the hardest challenges in order to see results in the future.

10

Cover Feature

WHAT DOES LIVING AN ALTERNATIVE LIVE MEAN TO YOU? Living an Alternative Lifestyle to me means that you live a lifestyle that’s not of the “norm”. Not something everyone is use to everyday. Living this lifestyle could mean you freely “do as you please”. A non traditional way of living.

WHAT'S YOUR GUILTY PLEASURE?

TRAVELING WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?

STEAK & POTATOES HOW DID YOUR ALT LIFE JOURNEY BEGIN? My partner and I pillow talked of the idea for years. I was listening to a podcast and one of the guest mentioned the app called Feeld. I downloaded the app and my husband and I created a profile and began looking for people to connect with. After a few months, we met with our first couple and we’ve flourished in the Alt Life since then.

HOW WOULD DO YOU DEFINE YOUR ALT LIFE?

VERY SUCCESSFUL

It has brought so many positive things to not only the Alt Life we live but in our marriage as a whole.

27 11

Cover Feature

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN LIVING AN ALT LIFE? WHAT ATTRACTED YOU TO IT? My partner and I have been in the ALT Life for 6+ years. My want for spice in the bedroom and to explore my sexuality is what attracted us to the alt Life.

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST TURN ON? EYES, SMILE & ARMS HUMOR, KIND & EMOTIONAL

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE VANILLA ACTIVITY?

DANCING

I’ve been dancing since before I could walk. I love dancing because it makes me feel so free! I can get lost in the music, move my body the way it tells me to and I feel so confident and comfortable doing so! I think that in every emotion I go through, I can express myself or relieve anything I need, through dancing.

WHAT IS ONE THING ON YOUR BUCKET LIST YOU HOPE TO DO THIS YEAR?

CLIFF JUMPING

WHAT IS ONE LESSONE YOU HAVE LEARNED ON YOUR ALT LIFE JOURNEY? Don’t have expectations. They will crush you! Remembering at the end of the day, your partner will always be there. And rejection is still a thing, 1 even when you are married. Always be open minded and don’t forget when you are uncomfortable, to say no or stop.

12

Woodhull Foundation

Make ALL Families Stronger A newly released report from the Center for American Progress confirms what many of us may already know, that strong families are linked to access to resources and financial stability. Family stability has been tied to the following progressive policies: increasing the minimum wage, strengthening collective bargaining, expanding Medicaid and supporting reproductive rights. You can read the report here.

This report flies in the face of conservative policies on family, especially the GOP platform on Marriage, Family and Society (content warning, but you can find it here). This analysis adds to a growing body of literature which shows that inadequate resources and financial stress contribute to unstable families. Strong families are tied to to adequate wages, affordable health care and other benefits, and access to family planning.

States with a progressive stance on these four policies also tend to have higher educational attainment and lower levels of incarceration – which is also good for families.

It is important to note Republican platforms have a negative impact on families – the party of so-called “family values.” GOP policies, like unionbusting

and

anti-choice

legislation,

keeps

families

stressed

and

struggling. Strong families have nothing to do with marriage between a man and a woman, but rather progressive policies that empower individuals to create strong partnerships with whomever they may love, however they may love. https://www.woodhullfoundation.org/progressive-policies-make-all-families-stronger/

13

A VIRGIN WHITE COUPLE

Playstyles

How I seduced at an interracial swingers party

by: Coco Temptation London

PT. 2 ...the three of us walked into what was a very small, dimly lit room, but there was more than enough room for the three of us. There was a little bit of small talk, but we all wanted to save time, so we all stripped while chatting.

Although I am naturally dominant, I strongly believe in allowing couples to acclimate to the situation, particularly when meeting me for the first time. I know that for some people, the fantasy of an “all-gunsblazing, first-time cuckolding session” might sound like fun. But in my opinion, more often than not, the priority should be to get used to each other and establish a level of trust first. Besides, isn't it always better to have something to look forward to?

My instincts told me to take a little step back and give each other the space to feel comfortable and get in the mood. They got onto the bed, and Steve promptly attended to Sally's pussy with his mouth. After a short while I climbed onto the bed and began to caress her soft white skin.

The dim lighting of the room added to the sense of intimacy and eroticism of the situation. She turned her head towards me and caressed my chest, at which point we began to kiss. I think this got Steve very excited because he started to fuck her. A big no-no in my book, as I never let cuckolds fuck their lady in my presence without requesting my permission. However, as stated previously, I do sometimes make an allowance for new couples.

I took the opportunity to reposition myself and slip my cock into Sally's mouth. Fully aware that with Steve now fucking her, he would be getting a close-up view of his partner’s lips and tongue navigating the contours of my hard black cock. As he thrust, he looked on with fascination. I knew exactly what he hoped for at this point. I told him that as a cuckold, it was his duty to serve me and show respect by sucking my cock. They both looked at each other and asked the other if it was ok to take this bold step for the very first time.

14

Playstyles

Both were fine, so Sally pointed my cock toward Steve’s face. He slipped his mouth around my hard shaft without even the slightest bit of hesitation, and fuck!!! Having guys suck my cock in front of their wife or girlfriend gives me an all-mighty rush. Even as I type this, my cock is throbbing and I can feel pre-cum oozing into my boxers. Both their lips slid along my ebony meat and occasionally met. Damn, horny.

Unfortunately for Steve, it was again all a bit too much so he had to stop fucking Sally and back down. I told him it was now time for me to take over. Normally at this point, I would have instructed the cuckold to grab a condom and put it on my cock. But on this occasion, I was way too eager to fuck his beloved partner and didn't want to risk nervous, inexperienced hands trying to put a condom on me. I did however pause to ensure that his hand gripped my cock and that he would be the one to guide me into his lady for the very first time. To me, it is a very important symbolic moment, and I wanted him to play a part in it.

As is often the case, and especially when I fuck a woman for the first time, I teased Sally for a while before giving her the full length of my cock. Just the tip at first. Pausing from time to time and ever so gradually giving her a bit more of me. Her pussy responded by naturally lubricating the pathway. I have flexible hips, so when I finally gave her my full length in a single authoritative thrust, she gasped with pleasure.

What a night. We fucked in various positions, at one point with Sally riding me. I often struggle with lying down to let a woman do that. In part, because it is such a horny site, my instinct is to throw a woman back down onto the bed and fuck with maximum intensity. I just can't lay still, so I find myself thrusting my hips upwards, looking into the woman's eyes and telling her to fuck me. Probably not the most dominant thing to say, but it seems to spur women on… Oh, what a sight; Sally rode my rigid cock with so much enthusiasm. Mmmmmm. From time to time she would slow down to give Steve a passionate kiss. Oh, how I love that; meeting couples in a committed relationship makes it a little bit more pleasurable. It is certainly a key element of what I refer to as real cuckolding.

After a bit more pleasurable grinding, Sally dismounted and lay down to be fucked once more by Steve. Again the naughtiness of the experience was a bit too much for him so he had to stop again after not that many thrusts.

More for me ;-)

15

Playstyles

Again I took over and began to fuck Sally with relish. Between the two of them, they talked excitedly about my spunk, so I knew it would soon be time for me back up my king of cum claims. After a while, I told Sally that I was ready to cum and that I was about to spurt my full creamy load. I pulled my cock out and quickly removed the condom, just in time.

Oh, the joy of fucking another man’s dear lady in front of them. I erupted and blasted my creamy load all over Sally's stomach and tits, roaring with pleasure at the delicious wickedness of it all.

As I moved off the bed, Steve didn't even hesitate to reclaim his dearest Sally. He got right on top of her, not the least bit concerned about the fact that my sticky deposit was all over her body. Another good indicator of Steve's openness to experiment with his inner cuckold perhaps?

Oh, the joy of fucking another man's dear lady in front of them.

They fucked briefly and then lay happily on the bed before asking me if I wouldn't mind giving them a moment to themselves before joining me outside. I explained that I fully understood and that I would chat with them again a little later.

I spent the rest of the night socializing and being a bit of a voyeur. After all, there is always something interesting to see at BMFC. When I next saw Steve and Sally, they were sitting on a sofa by the dance floor. As we chatted, they did what they have now been doing almost daily since that night we met almost two weeks ago. They expressed their happiness in having met me and thanked me for putting them so much at ease and for making their night such a pleasurable one. I am really enjoying getting to know this couple and looking forward to guiding them down the path of darkness, the pleasurable kind.

16

CADENCE RAYNE

Kink

GATEWAY TO BDSM: Igniting Passion and Imagination through Role-Play

BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism) is a realm of sexual exploration that can be both thrilling and deeply intimate. For individuals and couples interested in delving into BDSM, role-play can serve as a gentle and accessible gateway.

By incorporating various types of role-play into your sexual experiences, you can gradually explore power dynamics, dominance, submission, and other elements of BDSM. In this article, we will discuss how different forms of role-play can act as a stepping stone toward embracing the world of BDSM.

1 DOMINANT AND SUBMISSIVE:

Power Exchange role-play - Power exchange is a fundamental aspect of BDSM, and role-play provides an opportunity to experience the dynamics of dominance and submission. By assuming roles of a dominant and submissive partner, you can explore power dynamics, establish boundaries, and engage in activities like bondage, spanking, or verbal play.

Open communication and consent are vital to ensure a safe and enjoyable experience.

2 MASTER AND SLAVE:

Master/Slave role-play - Master/Slave role-play delves deeper into power exchange dynamics. In this scenario, one partner takes on the role of a Master or Mistress while the other embodies the role of a submissive slave.

This form of role-play explores obedience, service, and surrender. It can involve rituals, protocols, and commands, allowing both partners to embrace their desires and indulge in consensual power play.

17

Discipline role-play - Discipline role-play centers around authority and punishment. By adopting the roles of a strict teacher or professor and a naughty student, you can explore disciplinary scenarios.

This can involve spanking, corner time, or writing lines as part of the role-play. It allows you to embrace the dynamics of accountability, correction, and consensual punishment within a controlled and safe environment.

4 SADIST AND MASOCHIST: Pain Play role-play - For those interested in exploring the realms of pain and pleasure, pain play roleplay can be a gateway to the world of sadism and masochism. In this scenario, one partner assumes the role of a sadist, deriving pleasure from inflicting consensual pain, while the other partner embraces the role of a masochist, deriving pleasure from receiving pain. It is essential to establish clear boundaries, discuss limits, and use safe words to ensure a safe and enjoyable experience.

5 THE SEDUCTIVE STRANGER:

Kink

3

TEACHER AND STUDENT:

Imagine meeting your partner for the first time in a public place, both assuming different identities.

Engage in flirtatious banter, subtle touches, and the thrill of getting to know each other all over again.

Allow the mystery and anticipation to build as you rekindle the passion of a new encounter.

6

THE FORBIDDEN LOVE AFFAIR:

Bring the excitement of a secret rendezvous into your bedroom.

Assume the roles of two people engaged in a forbidden love affair, like a workplace romance or an affair with a person of power.

Explore the heightened desire, secrecy, and urgency that comes with a hidden connection.

7 THE NAUGHTY NURSE OR DOCTOR: Embrace the allure of the medical world by playing the part of a sexy nurse or doctor. Use props like stethoscopes, lab coats, and examination tables to create an exciting and seductive environment.

Explore power dynamics, trust, and the thrill of surrendering control.

18

1 COSTUMES AND PROPS:

3

DIALOGUES AND BODY LANGUAGE:

2

4

EXPLORATION AND ADAPTATION:

Invest in costumes, lingerie, and accessories that enhance the chosen role-play scenario. These items can help set the mood and transport you and your partner into the desired fantasy.

SETTING THE STAGE:

Pay attention to your bedroom's ambiance. Dim the lights, play sensual music, and utilize scented candles or incense to create a sensual atmosphere that aligns with your chosen scenario.

Kink

To maximize the impact of role-play, attention to detail is key. Consider the following elements to create an immersive experience:

Embrace the characters you are playing by using appropriate dialogues, accents, and body language. Immerse yourselves fully in the roles to enhance the authenticity and excitement of the experience.

Remain open to adapting and exploring new dynamics within your role-play. As you gain confidence and comfort, gradually introduce new elements or scenarios to keep the experience fresh and exciting.

BDSM role-play provides a gateway to explore the depths of power dynamics, pain and pleasure, and various fetishes within a consensual and controlled environment. It allows individuals to tap into their desires, push boundaries, and deepen trust and communication within a relationship. Remember, engaging in BDSM role-play requires open and honest communication, clear boundaries, and the utmost respect for consent. By embracing this world of exploration, you can discover new dimensions of pleasure, intimacy, and connection.

19

Lifestyle

A LESSON IN AUTHENTICITY Recently we were “outed”. Even though we took every precaution we knew to take, hiding our faces, geoblocking our location, and blocking everyone in our personal lives from our social media accounts, it still got out.

We were prepared for it, we knew it would eventually happen, and we were ready to have those tough conversations. What we weren’t ready for or didn’t expect was the loving and kind way that our family and friends, real friends, would respond to it.

APRIL, NAUGHTY GYM

Most of the people who know us and interact with us in-person daily have no idea what we do in our personal lives or online.

However, because we live in the “bible-belt”, we want to respect those around us and protect them from pushback. So we don’t talk or post openly about it.

Our family didn’t bat an eye and continued to love us, no questions asked. They didn’t chastise us or lecture us. My 74yr old Mother-inlaw was unphased.

A true expression of unconditional love.

Our friends, our TRUE friends, supported us and told us basically to tell everyone else to go fuck themselves. They had our backs and could care less.

What we’re “doing”, providing health and fitness to a demographic who want and need it, isn’t wrong. Nor does it hurt anyone or negatively affect anyone.

20

Of course, none of the negative comments were said directly to us.

It was all just whispering. Even some of our so-called friends.

Funny how that stuff always makes its way back to the people not meant to hear it.

Fortunately, we have tough skin.

We are almost completely unoffendable…(is that a word?).

That comes from living most of our lives being repressed, and finally, after years of being someone we weren’t, we decided to live life on our terms. We are coming into ourselves. We own who we are. We have created a life of adventure and love. It’s pretty incredible when something like being outed brings us even closer.

We are

unashamed

Lifestyle

You would think, in 2021, it wouldn’t be judged so harshly. In a culture where authenticity and body positivity is such a popular platform, it’s surprising that we heard so much pushback from those not so close to us. But that’s exactly where it came from… people in our local community where we live and work.

SO WHAT IS IT ABOUT THE SEX-POSITIVE AND BODYPOSITIVE CULTURE THAT SCARES PEOPLE SO MUCH? It may be their lack of confidence or self-esteem. Though my guess is, especially in the deep south (where we live), that it’s the lack of openness about sexuality or the religious indoctrination that teaches that it’s not okay to be sexual or to love your body.

Whatever it is, it breeds discontent and shame.

It’s incredible the number of private messages we receive every week from people in our community wanting advice (teachers, housewives, Sunday school teachers, nurses), and though we feel overwhelmingly unqualified to give advice, we want to help people find a path to living their best life and being their authentic self.

The best way we know to do that is to speak our truth and share our story. We are unashamed. We live our life unapologetically. It’s not always easy to go against the grain, but it’s worth it to us. We have never felt so free. We are passionate about two things; loving freely and helping others in their health and fitness journey.

We live our life

unapologetically If you are looking for help on your health and fitness journey and want a sex-positive and body-positive community to help support you, reach out to us. We would love to help!

You can email us at naughtygymonline@gmail.com or sign up for our online coaching by following this link:

www.naughtygym.com.

21

Mental Health

Best Practices for Consensual Non-Monogamy Consensual Non-monogamy (CNM) is the practice of giving informed consent to simultaneous, multiple sexual and/or romantic relationships. This can include polyamory, open relationships, swinging and relationship anarchy. Some people may desire and/or identify with CNM, but not engage in it. Keeping in mind the variety of CNM relationship structures and activities, consider the following when evaluating your own practices:

1

Do you feel you have an equal say in deciding your relationship agreements with each of your partners?

2 3

Do you fully understand both the desires and the boundaries of the other participants?

4 5

Are you aware of cultural differences and are you making sure that the language you’re using has the same meaning with everyone involved?

Are you able to consent to who will be involved in your activities prior to beginning?

6 7

Do you feel you have enough information to understand and to agree to any potential risks involved, and inform each other about any change(s)?

Are you able to consent freely, without facing coercion, force or manipulation?

Are you aware of your choices about STI prevention and pregnancy planning and/or prevention? Are these choices being respected by all of your partners?

22

Mental Health

Best Practices for Consensual Non-Monogamy 8

Are you free to withdraw prior consent at any time during the activity?

9 10

Are you basing consent on what you’ve agreed to rather than making assumptions based on what you’ve seen someone do with other people?

11 12

Are you basing your consent on your autonomous desires rather than what you are being asked to do or rather than what you’ve seen someone do with other people?

Are you aware that consent to one thing doesn’t mean you have to consent to anything else and that current consent does not imply future consent?

Do you feel that you understand everyone’s limitations or barriers to their ability to consent to the planned activities, such as age, diminished mental capacity, or use of drugs or alcohol?

13

Do you know that you can request changes to help you feel safe? For example, you could have somebody nearby during the activities, or you could also have other people present to verify that you are heard and consenting.

MORE INFORMATION For more information, consult resources of the American Psychological Association Division, 44 Consensual Non-monogamy Task Force: https://www.div44cnm.org/resources

23

24

Swinger Society Events

JOIN THE SWINGER SOCIETY

25

Why ALT Life?

WHY ALT LIFE? You may be wondering why we’ve decided to launch a magazine. That’s a fair question! If you’re familiar with us you know that we host one of the nation’s top podcasts on nonmonogamy and get millions of views m o n t h l y o n s o c i a l p l a t f o r m s li k e TikTok, Instagram, and Clapper.

So why add something else to our plate and start a digital magazine? The t r u t h i s , A L T L i f e M a g a z i n e is n ’ t a b o u t us. It’s about you and the community of people who have a message to share and need a platform to do it.

This magazine is for people who may n o t b e a b l e t o p u t t h e m s e lv e s o u t there publicly on social media due to f e a r o f j u d g m e n t a n d b a c k la s h . O v e r the last year and a half of our journey into becoming social media influencers for the a lt e r n a t i v e lifestyle community, the one thing that’s remained consistent is the community and the p e o p le that e n c o m p a s s i t . A l t e r n a t i v e li fe s t y le people are some of the kindest and m o s t g e n u i n e p e o p l e o n t h e p la n e t .

The world needs to hear your stories, t o g e t t o k n o w y o u , t o f a l l i n lo v e w i t h you like we have.

Our hope is that if they can see you for who you truly are, then perhaps the hate, the stigma, and the discrimination will come to an end.

We believe one of the best ways to do that is to do what we’ve pledged to do f r o m t h e b e g i n n i n g ; t o s h i n e a li t t le light on the community.

S o , w e ’ d l i k e t o e n c o u r a g e a ll o f y o u t o contribute, to share your stories, to be heard.

We want you to be able to show the w o r l d h o w t r u l y a m a z i n g a n d v a lu a b le this community is. We hope that one day we can all come out of the d a r k n e s s a n d n o t h a v e t o l i v e i n fe a r .

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MAGAZINE