Alive Magazine - Edition 13 - August 2021

WIDE BAY

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AUGUST 2021 EDITION #13

Gratitude Edition

UNITED IN A FIGHT FOR LIFE Meet the face of The “city of angels” who saved Cianna Full story on pages 05-07

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the many Marys Cultural icon retires after 23 years Full story on pages 14-15

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EDITOR’S WELCOME

A

s I write this, Victoria has yet again gone into another lockdown, Sydneysiders have been home-bound for weeks and currently there’s declared hotspots in Melbourne.

People are losing their jobs, their homes and their businesses … while us Queensland folk, while still on alert, continue to have the freedom to move about, travel, go to a restaurant and basically just keep going about our day-to-day lives (Yes, I’m definitely touching wood!)

Here at Alive HQ we are putting a hefty emphasis on gratitude this month and right now, I can’t feel more appreciative to live in a place that allows us our basic freedom as human beings.

Many of our columnists share their experiences of gratitude in this month’s edition, with Rhian still able to travel to Tasmania for her long-awaited wedding.

Join Andrew Chorley out on the water for some fishing hotspots, where his guests get to embrace our awesome coastal lifestyle while casting a line in some of the most popular waters in Queensland.

ONLINE MAGAZINE ON THE GO www.alivemag.com.au

We also show our appreciation to the Fraser Coast community who helped play a major part in the miracle recovery of a young Fraser Coast resident whose suffered a freak accident that left her close to death.

THE ALIVE TEAM

I also delve into the world of men’s mental health with a spotlight on the life-changing work that the volunteers at Fraser Coast Mates are doing.

Lives would be lost without their ongoing commitment to make change happen.

We also say thank you to the region’s beloved Mary Heritage who has given us 23 years of her life not only as various characters, but as a dedicated tourism ambassador for the region.

Plus, so much more.

Happy August Alivers!

Kerrie xo

UPCOMING EVENTS

HERVEY BAY SEAFOOD FESTIVAL When: Sunday, August 8, 10am-5pm

Founder / Creative Director JOY BUTLER info@alivemag.com.au

Deputy Editor LEANNE ESPOSITO

Digital Editor LIZZIE MACAULAY

Advertising Manager LOUISE HOLMES advertising@alivemag.com.au

Advertising Executive DARREN STIMPSON darren@alivemag.com.au

Advertising Representative KAREN WHITE karen@alivemag.com.au Phone 0418 197 386

Head of Distribution JAMIE BUTLER Phone 0428 137 968

All editorial and advertising in Alive Magazine publications are published in good faith based on material, verbal or written, provided by contributors and advertisers. No responsibbility is taken for errors or omissions and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher. All material in Alive Magazine is subject to copyright provisions. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher.

Where: Seafront Oval, Hervey Bay What: The very popular Seafood Festival returns to Hervey Bay in 2021. Foodies will delight in a day filled with exquisite seafood, sourced locally and from the greater Wide Bay region.

Cost: Adults $10, children $5

Feedback or suggestion?

Send to: info@alivemag.com.au

Visit: www.herveybayseafoodfestival.com.au

08 Aug

Editor KERRIE ALEXANDER editor@alivemag.com.au

8 Aug

BAY’S BIGGEST SLEEP OUT

Where: Hervey Bay Community Centre 22 Charles St, Pialba QLD

What: The Bay’s Biggest Sleep Out is aimed at raising funds to support the local families doing it tough in the Wide Bay region. Last year’s event raised more than $10,000 to help vulnerable community members live with dignity.Street.

13 Aug

Cost: From $50 Visit: www.hbnc.com.au/Event/bays-biggestsleep-out-august-7-2021

When: Sunday, August 22, 8am-5pm Where: Fraser Coast Sports Precinct

What: This major Rockabilly/custom vehicle and music festival is hosted by the Rockabilly Rumblers Car Club in Hervey Bay, there will be three live bands, 250 cars on show, live pinstriping, vintage clothing and American food vans.

22 Aug

Where: Criterion Hotel, Maryborough

FRASER COAST MATES INAUGURAL DINNER When: Fri, 13 Aug, 6:00pm

Where: The Beach House Hotel 344 Esplanade, Scarness QLD What: The first Fraser Coast Mates Annual Dinner with guest speakers, former AFL legend, Wayne Schwass.

Delicious food, live music and most importantly a chance to catch up with mates.

WIDE BAY ROCK AND RUMBLE

Cost: $25 a family, $10 adult.

When: Sun, 8 Aug, from 8.30pm

What: The night will consist of a ghost tour we will go on a short walk and guide you through the history and haunted history of The Criterion Hotel and other famously haunted locations on Wharf Street.

When: 7th Aug 6:00pm to 8th Aug 7:00am

07 Aug

HAUNTED SLEEPOVER

20 Aug

REGIONAL DISABILITY EXPO

Where: Hervey Bay PCYC O’Rourke St, Pialba

When: August 20, 9.30am-4pm

What: This is an event not to be missed for people with disabilities, families, carers and friends, plus community minded people who would like to check out all available services in the one place.

Visit: www.facebook.com/ Rockabillyrumblersfrasercoast Alive Magazine Wide Bay |

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The All NEW A-CLASS Extraordinary. Just like you.

The A-Class The Mercedes-Benz A-Class is here. Talk to it and it listens. Touch it and it responds. Drive it and it learns. With a cutting edge mix of athletic

Just like you.

Visit Mercedes-Benz Hervey Bay and meet the A-Class Sedan today.

Cameron Bates

Sales Consultant Mercedes-Benz Hervey Bay

www.mbherveybay.com.au Applicable to new and demonstrator A-Class Sedan first registered on or after 1 March 2020 for 5 years from the date of first registration of the vehicle. Warranty start time may differ for demonstrator vehicles. Commercial application of vehicle is subject to 5 years from first registration date or 200,000km (whichever occurs first). Battery warranty periods vary. Excludes customers with specific warranty arrangements with Mercedes-Benz. For full terms, conditions and exclusions please refer to the warranty statement here https://www.mbherveybay.com.au/en/desktop/passenger-cars/services/warranty-and-repairs/new-vehicle-warranty.html.

Mercedes-Benz Hervey Bay 96 Boat Harbour Drive, Hervey Bay 07 4194 4444 3585388 www.mbherveybay.com.au

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C O V E R ST O RY

by Leanne Esposito

Grateful

FOR OUR MODERN MEDICAL WORLD If you don’t believe in miracles, then you’ve forgotten that you are one

W

hat would you do and how would you feel if your child had been saved by a city of angels?

This is a story of the courage and bravery of one little girl and the overwhelming support she received from hundreds of family, friends and medical geniuses, and the phenomenal feats that saved her life. It is also a story of an awakening, awareness and the promise to do more.

Abraham Lincoln, Rose Kennedy and Theodin from the Lord of the Rings The Two Towers have all, through personal loss and grief, stated an obvious truth that “no parent should have to bury a child.” Granted the LOTR is fantasy, but it is a fantasy about a semi-medieval or pre-modern world. So, in the context of such a world, child and infant mortality would be rather high. In the realworld Lincoln and Kennedy both suffered losses with the death of children, each stating that it was every parent’s worst nightmare.

Thankfully in this modern world of ours the child mortality rate has decreased significantly. Statistically, the chance of children surviving into adulthood has greatly increased in the last 200 years due to advances in medicine.

Across the Wide Bay we are fortunate that numerous dedicated expert medical personnel are servicing hospitals in Bundaberg, Maryborough and Hervey Bay. Daily they do the work of angels.

For one local family the drama which has reshaped their lives and given them a potently breathtaking memory of 2021 began earlier this year. Parents Maureen Murphy and Andrew Brenia were plunged into a nightmarish, touch and go world, when their 11-year-old daughter Cianna was injured in a freak farm accident. Due the severity of her injuries and massive blood loss Cianna was to ‘crash’ and be revived several times during her time in hospital. The ‘D’ word wasn’t mentioned but death was an ever-present reality.

What started out as a fun day on the farm in the blink of an eye turned to drama when Cianna was pierced through the

abdomen by an errant stick. According to Maureen, Cianna’s recollection of events are still sharp. Immediately after the initial incident, while possibly in shock, she did not lose consciousness.

She stayed calm. Cianna has since told her mother how she felt the stick stab through her right leg, only she wasn’t aware of how deeply it entered her body. They later learnt that it went right through to her abdomen, severing a main vein. Maureen tells me of the events surrounding the incident.

“Cianna was on my mum’s property with a friend who was 10. They were driving around in a small dune buggy which was equipped with a full cage and seat belts. They each wore helmets and goggles. It is a large property, and they continuously cleared the perimeters. It was a windy day that weekend. On the fifth time around the friend was going to have a go. Cianna attempted to clear the debris by rolling over the sticks and breaking them up; something she had done on numerous occasions. Instead of snapping this flexible stick flicked up underneath the buggy and stabbed her. Still, she thought that she could drive up and get help so she pushed her foot on the pedal but she couldn’t do it. She told her friend to run and get help and she ran for my son Jaxon who is 9. The friend was screaming. They alerted my brother James who took her up to the house and kept her awake while they awaited medical help,” Maureen said.

Soon Cianna gave way to unconsciousness. The ambulance was on its way, but she was losing blood fast. James does not hold a first aid certificate, yet he instinctively performed CPR on his niece. It was the first step to saving her life. During the ride to hospital Cianna was in a precarious position.

Andrew and Maureen met the ambulance at the hospital thinking it was only a minor incident. Maureen tells me that when the doors to the ambulance opened she was shocked to her core. It was a bitter-sweet moment as her brave little girl greeted her mother with a smile.

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“Her skin was grey. She looked at me and said hi mum. It was such a relief. I found out later that the ambos were so happy that she acknowledged me. She was in a delicate state throughout the ride to the hospital,” she said.

As the emergency room doors closed behind it’s clear that Maureen was still unaware of the severity of Cianna’s injury.

However, after surveying the room and doing a summary headcount, warning lights began to flicker in her mind and then disaster struck.

“There were forty people in teams of colours all around the emergency room I remember looking at them and thinking that it was a bit of an overkill for just a stick in the leg. The head of emergency introduced himself and while he was talking to me she coded – they were performing CPR. “They were working quickly. Like a machine.

Groups of people moved forward and then back for another team to take over. It was incredible. Very professional. So well trained.

“After bringing in the ultrasound and investigating they found it was worse than first thought. They rushed her to theatre.

Apparently it was the quickest evaluation ever at the Hervey Bay Hospital – 17 minutes from emergency into theatre. The emergency doctor told me he was relieved to make it to theatre. It was surreal. We were told of the severed vein and that she had lost four fifths of her blood,” Maureen said.

The rollercoaster ride between life and death began. And it wouldn’t be the last time that Cianna found herself standing on the edge of life’s cliff face. She had so many medical mountains to climb over in the next few months.

The surgical team worked on her for over eleven hours. The doctors would provide Maureen with an update every two. After eight of those hours a doctor told her that Cianna was still critical, that they were winning, and there was a glimmer of hope.

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He said that Hervey Bay was in damage control and that they needed to get her to a Brisbane hospital. Maureen was living every parent’s worst nightmare.

“As a mum I was planning her funeral and imagining my life without her. I was thinking how am I going to live? I didn’t talk to anyone. I would jump up each time the doctor appeared,” she said.

When Cianna was admitted to ICU Maureen watched a thirty strong team of ICU specialists attend to her survival.

“We watched off to the side like spectators.

Everyone had a job. No one was standing around. A wardie was running in with blood.

There was a relay cycle getting blood. A CPR team. She was on so many monitors. She was critical. Then they said they were flying her to Brisbane.

“They were running out of blood. They called in the retrieval team but she was too critical for them.

“The head of ICU at the children’s hospital was flown up to make the decision and he was here for a few hours as we sat and watched him.

“Every time she moved she was crashing and they were performing CPR. The most critical part was taking her from ICU to the helicopter.

“A team of 30 followed us up in a line to the helicopter. As we took to the air I saw all the nurses and ward managers - it was like looking down at a city of angels,” she said.

Maureen who was told to stay in her seat at all costs – even if the worst should happen – cried the entire trip. Her partner Brian Westlake drove from Hervey Bay to Brisbane arriving at 2am. After the helicopter took flight another landed within two minutes. The remaining family thought the worst. Later they heard there was a critical patient from an accident on that helicopter.

When Maureen was informed she started thinking about that accident victim. She and

Andrew did a count of the blood that Cianna had used at around 50 litres. They were concerned for that patient.

“Because we heard about that accident coming in after us that Sunday and we had watched the number of people running for blood while we were sitting in ICU we thought the person after needed it. We worried that Hervey Bay needed more blood so we contacted our families and friends to go and donate. We contacted Lifeblood to get more people to donate via the Cianna (#donateforcianna) Facebook page,” Maureen said.

In an amazing call to action 600 people donated. The group gathered the most blood and was ranked number one in the region during the first six months.

However, Cianna’s first six weeks were not so easy. Her plans to return home

by Easter were thwarted due to another medical emergency. She was rushed to the surgical ward and was again unresponsive as a huge blood clot occupied her entire stomach. It was caused by the fluctuations of her blood pressure. It erupted. Once again she faced death. Maureen makes an observation on Cianna’s strength.

“I thought I had lost her that night. It was precarious. She had defied all odds. We had been happy and laughing. Cianna takes you right to the edge and pulls you (with her) as she fights for her life,” Maureen said.

her Firebird training partner.

As Cianna grows with a focus towards health and they look to the future Maureen tells me how their perspectives on life have changed. They now live in gratitude for the people of this region who rallied around them with gifts of food, vouchers and rehabilitation.

“I am a true Hervey Bay cliché. I grew up here, went off to uni and returned to have a family. When I saw this big community rallying around my child I was completely overwhelmed by the responses of the collective humanity. I feel very connected and loved. This place is magic. We received a surge of support. It’s like we’ve been given a massive warm hug,” she said.

While Cianna’s stomach scar heals it will be forever a reminder of what she’s endured as her eyes are now open to the plight of the sick and suffering of people like those she encountered in hospital. Her mission in life now is to give back and has asked her mum when can she give blood.

The events that surround Cianna’s story is best summed up by the words of Alsatian theologian, musician, philosopher, and physician Albert Schweitzer M.D.

During the next four weeks in hospital Cianna lost 10 kilos in weight. However, her waif like appearance didn’t spoil her homecoming as she and Maureen decided to make a surprise appearance.

According to Maureen Cianna is now 80 percent normal and back playing her beloved netball, even representing her region. Netball is her passion and it’s what kept her going while in hospital with the Queensland Firebirds sending her wellwishes, videos and a membership to upcoming games. A major reward is to meet

Sometimes our light goes out, but is blown again into instant flame by an encounter with another human being.”

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WHALE WATCHING WITH CAPTAIN PHIL

MA K E A DAY O F I T B Y T H E MA R I N A

I

f you’ve ever been on a whale watching cruise in Hervey Bay, there’s a good chance you have been on a boat skippered by Captain Phil House.

Captain Phil has been helping locals and visitors to the Fraser Coast see the humpback whales as they migrate along Australia’s eastern coastline since the late 1990s.

“It’s something that I never get tired of,” said Captain Phil.

“Whales are so special and our cruises allow for two species of mammals to interact on the calm waters of Hervey Bay.” Boating has a special place in Captain Phil’s heart.

When he is not out on the water skippering vessels during the popular whale watching season, Captain Phil can be found leading Twilight Bay Cruises, Sandy Straits Scenic and Wildlife Cruises and Mary River ‘Sunday in the Park’ Cruises for The Boat Club Adventure Cruises.

The job includes two of Captain Phil’s passions – skippering boats and storytelling.

“When I’m out on the water I’m not just controlling the boat, I am constantly interacting with our passengers. I’ve learnt so much about whales, the waterways and the area since joining the industry.”

He said the cruises, especially those up the Mary River, help him share the area’s history with passengers.

“I’ve learnt about the different families that lived along the river and Maryborough’s rich history - and I get to share that with our guests.”

With the 2021 whale watching season in full swing, Captain Phil said he was looking forward to ensuring his passengers received the perfect view of the humpback whales.

Hervey Bay is considered one of the best whale watching areas in the world and that’s thanks to the positioning of K’gari (Fraser Island).

“Hervey Bay offers whales, especially mothers with newborn calves, a place of refuge as they continue their migration back to Antarctica,” explained Captain Phil.

The relatively shallow water in comparison to the open ocean means there is little place for predators to ambush calves. The bay is protected from strong swells by K’gari and almost becomes a playground for the whales that stopover.

“Some of the whales will stay for around a week and they become very calm and inquisitive,” explained Captain Phil.

“Humpback whales are naturally curious so they will come up to the boats to see what is going on.”

boatclubwhalewatch.com.au Phone: (07) 4128 9643 08

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Information for members & guests.

Captain Phil urged locals and visitors to book a whale watching tour with The Boat Club Adventure Cruises this year.

He said the boat was very stable on the water and designed to give passengers a comfortable experience.

Passengers are also offered discounts at the Boat Club.

“It’s a whole day experience, not just the cruise,” said Captain Phil.

Most importantly, he said his crew was passionate about what they do and put passengers first.

For more information on the different cruises, visit www. boatclubadventurecruises.com.au.

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LIZZI E L EA RNS TO

by Lizzie Macaulay

LIZZIE LEARNS TO PLAY

Wheelchair Basketball As is the way with this column, however, I was right, and I was wrong. More on that later, though.

Entering the building, Joy and I were greeted by Michael, who was setting up, and Corey and Henry - both players with impressive CVs.

Corey had played at the national level, and was kind enough to give me the lowdown on the fundamentals.

I tried to keep up – that guy knows his stuff…

What I retained is this:

1. There are four categories of disabled player, depending on the nature and severity of their disability.

2. The wheelchairs are specially designed for maximum manoeuvrability (and crash-into-ability).

3. The rules are pretty much the same as ‘normal’ basketball, except for the way the ball moves around the court.

4. The Fraser Coast has a growing group of players that are competing, and excelling, at a state and national level.

As more players filtered in to begin the training session, my shyness started to tug at me, and I contemplated running back out the door.

But you can’t have adventures if you don’t try new things, so I climbed aboard my chair and wheeled to the starting line for the first drill.

This drill, for a complete novice like me, was the sporting equivalent of patting your head and rubbing your tummy.

Bounce the ball – push the chair – catch the ball – repeat.

Still trying to figure out how to steer, this took some perseverance and generally setting my pride aside to surrender to the fact I wasn’t a wheelchair basketball genius yet.

As afternoon turned to evening, we continued with a bunch of drills and I got to know more of the players by name, and personality.

There was Ollie, the 12-year-old who may have been the youngest by a distance, but was totally adept and in his element.

B

asketball.

Being more than a little vertically, and athletically, challenged, it’s not a sport I would necessarily associate myself with.

So what an interesting prospect it was to be invited along to play wheelchair basketball with the Fraser Coasters this month.

I was more than a little curious what it would be like, and after speaking with team coach, Michael Oxley to arrange my visit, that curiosity grew.

Michael spoke with me about the fact that this sport is one of the few reverse inclusionary sports going around. That, in fact, while it was designed for players with disabilities, all abilities are welcome.

When the day arrived, I was excited – I’d been telling everyone what I was about to do, and thinking about what it might be like fairly constantly.

Would it be scary and violent like I’d heard wheelchair rugby (or more colloquially, ‘murderball’) could be?

What if I embarrass myself and don’t do a good job?

And the quintessential question: what’s it like to be in a wheelchair?

I’d never sat in a wheelchair before, let alone propelled myself in one, so I’d anticipated the whole experience being quite difficult.

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There was Anita, who seemed to constantly be on the precipice of mischief. (And I loved her for it!)

Shelley, the crack shot.

And Jess, who was kind enough to let me shadow her and learn the ropes.

After a while, I noticed that I wasn’t quite as terrible as when I first started the session.

That wheeling around, and feeling the breeze in your face was actually quite freeing.

I imagined that it must be a beautiful feeling for players confined to wheelchairs to be able to move so quickly and with such dexterity.

The sport is frustrating and awkward at times, but tell you what, when I finally managed to ‘score’, you would probably have heard my squeals of delight all across the Fraser Coast.

And just like that, practice was over and the first match of the season was about to begin.

A basketball court has never looked bigger than the moment I realised we would be utilising every inch of it throughout the game.

The moment had come for me to apply everything I had learned in the prior hour, and not let my team down – or at least, try my best.

And try I did.

I had no idea of the rules (just like the able-bodied version), and my transgressions were very kindly, patiently overlooked by all the players.

I have honestly not had a better time playing team sports, ever.

The group was so incredibly welcoming, kind and accepting.

When the first quarter ended, it was time for me to head off and hand the game back to the fabulous people who didn’t need to be hampered by my novice skills a moment longer.

My arms were aching anyway from an evening well spent trying something completely new.

I’m absolutely delighted to have had the chance to try this incredible sport, and meet the wonderful people involved.

I had no idea what to expect going in, but I was pleasantly surprised in every regard.

If you’re looking for a sense of community, to try something a bit different, to keep your heart rate up and your mind sharp, I’d strongly recommend giving wheelchair basketball a go.

If nothing else, you can come for the flashy pink shirt and stay for the fabulous company.

With enormous gratitude to Michael Oxley and the Fraser Coasters.

Based at the Maryborough Basketball club, the team is always looking for new players and volunteers. Head to the Fraser Coasters Wheelchair Basketball Facebook page for more info.

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H OME GROWN

by Kerrie Alexander

TURNING DARKNESS INTO DAYLIGHT When you think your life is at rock bottom and there’s nowhere to turn … Fraser Coast Mates has your back.

Y

ou have caught up with a mate and you notice that he’s not being his usual upbeat self.

He looks unhappy but continues to reassure you that’s he’s fine, there’s nothing wrong – he’s just a bit stressed but he’ll be okay.

You walk away with your mate on your mind but don’t want to dig any further or pry into his life.

In the coming weeks you receive a phone call that shocks you to your core! Your mate has taken his life.

You asked the question “are you okay”, and that should have been an opening for your friend to speak up, but he didn’t.

He didn’t understand that it’s in no way weak to speak up!

That is the story for many who were the best of friends with local businessman who also left behind a wife and two children five years ago.

A group of about seven of those mates came together not long after his death, still in shock, but all carrying an

overwhelming emotion of wanting to bring mental health issues out into the open.

They wanted to find a way to advocate that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Promote that mental health doesn’t discriminate and that it is an illness.

It was at that get together that the ultimate questions were raised.

Why do men feel like they need to hide their emotions and not share the problems that are taking a toll on their life? And, if someone does tell you they need help, what is the next step?

About five months later that same group of men dug deep for those answers and shared them with all the region through the fruition of Fraser Coast Mates.

The not-for-profit group formed a committee and started off by hosting the inaugural Fraser Coast Mates Golf Day, with the view of providing a relaxed and trusting atmosphere where blokes could feel free to have a chat without judgement.

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There was over 100 people in attendance for that first game of golf.

“That was something back from the original committee asking where do we go and what do we do.

While Australia-wide services do an outstanding job, Darren said it was an important aspect for their organisation to focus on providing a local, more personalised form of help.

“Not everyone has to be educated enough to provide the right advice, but everyone can at least say we’re here to help and listen and find the right service.”

Now five years on, founding member Darren Bosley said the organisation has gone from strength to strength, with over 200 people attending the annual golf day, plus the building of solid foundations when it comes to providing essential services that men can access in their time of need.

From that, the Fraser Coast Mates Website and Facebook page was launched, and a local counsellor from Trauma Assist was made accessible typically within 72 hours of anyone needing help.

FCM encourage anyone with mental health issues to seek the advice of a GP, with many of the possible outcomes being to make an appointment with a councillor.

However, with local services already stretched many couldn’t get the help they needed right away and gave up trying.

“The most crucial step to this is when people finally admit they have a problem and have put up their hand to say they need help, then they struggle to get the help,” Darren said.

“With our councillor we can typically get them in within 72 hours.

“They are a really responsive and a great organisation and I know of guys that, by seeing them, they have saved their lives.

“They made the biggest hurdle of recognising they need help. The most successful results I’ve seen in guys is getting the tools they need to deal with their mental health issues.”

As a society, awareness surrounding mental health has certainly been brought into the spotlight in recent years but what still needs work, Darren said, is making it easier for people to speak up and helping the ones listening to know what steps to take to help that person.

Fraser Coast Mates is a brilliant platform for both instances.

“We ask the question a lot ‘are you okay’, which is great, but it doesn’t necessarily come out the first time you ask it.

“It’s constantly checking in with friends and constantly reminding them that they can trust them to speak up and share their feelings.

“The next thing is if someone does open up, how do you handle it?

Other support services: • Lifeline 13 11 14 • Headspace 1800 650 890

“Through our website we are trying to make it easier for people to find the services but part of it is also educating people to be really good listeners and if someone does speak up, to feel comfortable with someone sharing their feelings with them and what you’re going to do from them there.

Darren said the next step is ensuring that person actually takes the steps to seek help.

“Statistics show that 75% of suicides don’t speak to a professional service!

“That tells me that 75% of people taking their lives haven’t gone and tried these services and we need to change that. “if you can, sit down with them and make that first appointment to see a counsellor.”

From there, the counsellor will tailor a plan for that person, arming them with the tools they need to cope with their depression or anxiety.

What works for one person may not work for the next, Darren said.

“Most of the time the person’s life is out of routine and they withdraw from society.

“So let’s get a routine going with some self-care and that could be something as simple as taking time out to go for a walk, go fishing or read a book.

“Don’t discount any mental health service … go and give it a try and see what works for you.”

If you need help or know someone that does, jump online and head to frasercoastmates.com.au, find their details on Facebook or email admin@frasercoastmates.com.au.

You can also access the Little Black Book on the FCM website.

The book, an initiative of FCM and Fraser Coast Regional Council, is a directory of services, contacts and support groups, which aims to empower men to reach their potential and enjoy a long and high-quality life.

A healthy man, in body and mind, creates healthy relationships, healthy families and healthy communities.

Please remember, it aint weak to speak!

• Beyondblue 1300 224 636 • Suicide call back service 1300 659 467

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13

WI S E WORDS

by Kerrie Alexander

Final act of

Mary magic

D

ressed beautifully in her 1850s-inspired costume and overlooking her beloved Mary River, Mary Heritage fired the historic time cannon one last time at the Portside Precinct.

The crowd were left in awe of Carmel Murdoch’s cheery character whose knowledge of the region just rolled off the tongue without hesitation.

It has been this passion for Maryborough, her ability to connect with the community, and her unwavering devotion to the job, that has made Mrs Murdoch and her various Mary characters nothing short of iconic for the past 23 years.

Being her last day before officially retiring, I expected to sit down with an emotional Mrs Murdoch who didn’t want her time to come to an end.

Sitting in the historic canvas chairs in the Bond Store, where she had no doubt shown through thousands of guests over the years, she was instead full of gratitude for a life well lived and roles well played as Mary Heritage, Mary Poppins, Mary Christmas, Mary Widow, Mary Rose, Mary Rivers, and Steam Punk Mary.

Four years ago, Mrs Murdoch led the Mary Poppins Festival for what she thought may be the last time after being diagnosed with bowel cancer.

But after recovering from surgery, she was able to get back to work and now, after all the years of hard work as a tourism ambassador for the region, she was grateful to make the decision to retire on her own terms.

“I’m not at all sad. I feel satisfied and happy,” Mrs Murdoch said.

“I’ve been working since I was 15, so that’s 55 years of working life and I just felt it was time.

“I have done my job to the best of my ability, and I think that’s all that anyone can ask.

“I hope I have entertained visitors and locals alike with all of the many characters and certainly that I have done a good job

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promoting the region in which we live.”

So just how did Carmel Murdoch become the various Mary’s?

Let us turn back the clock 23 years ago when someone from council made a phone call that would change the course of Maryborough’s history.

Mrs Murdoch was working at Boys Department store in Maryborough when she had to go into hospital for major surgery.

The store was sold to Dimmeys during that time and Mrs Murdoch came back to work only to be told she no longer had a job.

Full of anger, she walked outside the store where a recently retired Mary Heritage just happened to be standing.

“I walked out, and I was really angry” she said.

“The previous Mary Heritage was standing outside, and she said, ‘you don’t look happy’.

“I told her what happened, and she said, well you should apply for Mary Heritage.

“I said I don’t want to be Mary Heritage, but here we are 23 years later”, she said with a laugh.

“Council contacted me and wanted me to come in for an interview, and so I thought, well, it’s something to do until I get another job, and that was it.”

From the moment she donned the Mary Heritage costume, created to honour Maryborough officially becoming a port of entry in 1859, Mrs Murdoch used her own unique sense of fun and frivolity to create each character’s persona.

Crowned the “heritage city”, Maryborough predates Queensland’s other historic towns by a number of decades, having once been one of only two ports in Australia that processed tens of thousands of immigrants, alongside Sydney Harbour.

With no Google or internet available at that time, Mrs Murdoch

used library books to research and memorise all the content for her varied adventures.

That included jumping on board buses at town hall and creating her own guided tours as Mary Heritage, to the cheeky Mary Widow who loved looking for millionaires on the bus to marry, before taking them on ghostly tours of Maryborough’s cemetery, City Hall and undoubtably the Fraser Coast’s most haunted house, Mavis Bank.

“She had two millionaires on a bus one night and one was married, and one had a crook back so neither of them were any good to her,” she said with a laugh.

“Mary Widow was a real entertainer.

“Each character had different persona, a different name badge and different character for each version.

“The character I enjoyed the most was Mary Widow because she’s the closest to the Carmel character … she likes to tell jokes and Carmel is very much like that.”

There has been plenty of storytelling, dancing, singing, and chimneysweeps as part of all her characters but one that will remain close to her heart is Mary Heritage.

Mrs Murdoch has attended 16 Australian Town Crier Championships, including the World Championships that were held in Maryborough in 2005, and won 13 costume awards.

“Mary Heritage organised the Town Crier competition and for me, that has been the biggest highlight of my career in my time as any of the Mary’s.

“I convinced people from all over the world to travel to Maryborough, and we had 65 town criers and their partners, 1193 motor homes at the show grounds … it went for a week or more and it was absolutely wonderful.

“The whole community became involved.”

After the tremendous support shown for the competition, Mary Heritage – along with other community stalwarts like Nancy Bates - played an integral part in also bringing the Mary Poppins Festival, Pub Crawl and the Back to the Banyan Festivals to fruition.

She said the costumes for all these festivals also played a big part in putting the spotlight on the Heritage City.

“It was just an absolutely fabulous year,” she said.

“I’ve loved my roles and extolling the fabulous things we have here. There isn’t a day when I’m wearing the costume that I don’t get asked for photos.

“The costumes have been brilliant for promoting Maryborough.

“I will miss the roles, but I have so much else to do. I might even go fly a kite.”

In her 55 years of working life, Mrs Murdoch has been a cashier at a butcher shop, a farmer, coffee shop waitress, babysitter, apprentice hairdresser, worked in hotels at front reception and bars and a post office attendant where she met Steve McQueen and John Wayne.

She has been an Estee Lauder beauty advisor and TV presenter for David Jones and Geoff McWilliams Amcal

Pharmacy, where she worked for 15 years.

Hosted countless fashion parades and charity events and is a much-loved member of many community groups like the Proud Marys, the Maryborough Zonta Club and the local historical society and supports many other causes.

She loves her poodles, enjoys reading, pottering in the garden, jewellery making and hosting her monthly girls’ night in and happy hour with the neighbours.

So, retirement will be far from quiet for the fun-loving and spirited 70-year-old.

But the one part of life that is dearest to her heart is being a mother, granny and great granny - a role she will relish in now that she has some extra time on her hands.

“Family to me is the most important thing!

“I wouldn’t care if I lost everything in this world, as long as I have my family, I’m happy.”

To celebrate her retirement an exhibition of her dresses and memorabilia is being staged at the Story Bank from now until the end of August.

She was also presented with a book called ‘Becoming Mary’, a pictorial of all her characters over the past 23 years.

Mrs Murdoch was kind enough to show me through the marvellous exhibition where she took a stroll down a remarkable memory lane.

In true Carmel style, she wished me a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious day and went on her way to her very last Story Bank weaving class.

Mrs Murdoch was to make her final appearance at this year’s Mary Poppins Festival in July however due to Covid-19 concerns the event was postponed.

The free event will now be staged at the Portside Precinct from August 26-29 where a new storyteller will be introduced to the region.

They will, of course, have big shoes to fill.

“I just hope that they (council) choose someone that is a people person and can talk to people.

“As long as the people can relate to what you’re telling them, I think that’s the most important thing.”

Congratulations on your retirement Carmel Murdoch! You are an inspiration to us all.

I wouldn’t care if I lost everything in this world, as long as I have my family, I’m happy.”

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15

COM M UNI TY CONNEC T I O N

by Kerrie Alexander

POPPY PROJECT

grows

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N

ine incredibly talented local poppy artists have come together for the ‘Lest We Forget’ poppy project, which incorporates crafting 1443 single ceramic Flanders poppies and then ‘planting’ them on the grassed slope of the light horse memorial for Anzac Day services in 2022.

Poppy Project leader Fliur-Louise Genevieve – an ex-service member of the Royal Australian Navy - said the tribute will be a visual art installation that recognises the service and sacrifices made by those who are listed on the light horse memorial, Freedom Park, and the Pialba Memorial Cenotaph.

There will also be one lone purple poppy to commemorate the animals that served during conflicts.

“The poppies will occupy a space of approximately 50 square meters and we hope those who view them will pause for a moment of reflection upon the service and sacrifices made by all military members and how these allow us to enjoy the freedom and lifestyle we all enjoy,” Fliur-Louise said.

While the poppy project was inspired by Paul Cummins and Tom Piper, who conceived and then developed the 2014 Tower of London poppy installation, the design of these poppies is original to the group.

This includes the talents of volunteer artists Annie Alexander, Camille Sangster, Fay Thomson, Helen Kirk, Irene Brown, Jo Shadbolt, Kaye Moffat, Ruth Dillon and Irene’s husband Alec who singlehandedly preparing all the poppies stems.

Poppy artist Helen said when making the poppies she is thoughtful of the sacrifices these military personnel have made and as such each poppy is lovingly created with a service person and their sacrifices in mind. They take about two- anda-half hours to complete from start to finish and an additional two days to fire the poppies.

When planted in the garden each poppy stands approximately 35cm tall, are designed to be outside and will hold water so that small birds can drink from them.

“It was important that the poppy was constructed in a way that could be readily replicated, and as such are hand sculpted with the assistance of a mould and petal templates,” she said.

The group hopes to raise $45,000 for the not-for-profit charity.

“Poppies need to be pre-purchased prior to the display and then collected after Anzac Day.

“Each poppy is one of a limited number and as such we expect demand to be significant, so on the first day of sale only RSL members will be able to purchase these poppies.

“We are confident that the funds raised will make a real difference.”

The project is proudly sponsored by a $6000 grant from the Hervey Bay RSL Community Grants Program and a $6000 donation from the Hervey Bay RSL Sub-Branch.

Local businesses are also encouraged to support the project by purchasing one of 14 mounted poppies, which have an identifying number on dog tags and are ideal for display in an office.

“These poppies will sell for the value of their numerical number and we are delighted that our first poppy in this collection, number 1000 has been sold to Vivid Home Builders.

“We would love to hear from other business who would like to support Mates4Mates with a poppy purchase.”

Interested businesses can find out more by emailing poppyprojecthb@yahoo.com.

Special thanks to:

• The Hervey Bay RSL and the Hervey Bay RSL Sub-Branch for funding the project.

• Cassie O’Brien from the Fraser Coast Anglican Collage for her time and assistance with firing the school’s kiln and The Bay Potters who are supporting the group with access to their kiln.

• The Hervey Bay Men’s Shed for building poppy stands on very short notice.

• The Pialba Bowling Club who are providing a venue for a poppy making event.

• Keane’s Ceramics who supported the group with glazing requirements.

“This ensures that each poppy is similar in size but is completely individual in its finishing.

“We have been very fortunate to have Fay Thomson join our team, who has extensive ceramics experience and has been able to guide the team in the firing and glazing process.

“Each poppy is truly as unique as the person commemorated.”

The project will be completed in time for the poppies to go on sale from Monday, April 11 for $25 each, until sold out and can be purchased from the foyer of the RSL.

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17

DUNGA DERBY

by Kerrie Alexander

DUNGAS LIGHTEN THE LOAD OF AUSSIE BATTLERS

W

hether you call them clangers, clunkers, rust buckets or simply just dungas … hundreds of Fraser Coast residents get behind the wheel of their beloved rattly rally cars every year for one exceptionally good reason!

The Dunga Derby is run every year to support local families and individuals with life-limiting medical conditions or those who need help from a situation beyond their control.

Under the umbrella of the Rally for a Cause charity, those Dunga Derby teams raised a record $260,000 last year and a massive $1.3 million since its inception in 2015.

That money has since provided support to over 100 local Fraser Coast families in their times of crisis.

Each month, Alive Magazine will publish a Dunga Derby column with a focus on the families who have been recipients of this vital support.

Those who have thrown a dollar in a dunga tin, attended events or even sponsored a car, will read about the incredible difference those life-changing donations have made to the recipients.

It’s usually not until something drastic happens in our life that we stop and think about how lucky we all are.

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You can be sure that after someone close to us falls ill or dies, you will hear someone else say how time is short, life is precious, and we need to make the most of it.

In this edition of Alive we express our Gratitude in a number of ways for all things we are grateful for.

In this instance, I am grateful to every single person involved in this outstanding charity.

They are changing the lives of people who are battling through circumstances totally out of their control.

Below is a story about Gemma Lightbody, who is the mother of Connie – the first recipient story we published in Alive.

Gemma and her husband Ben have endured more than anyone could humanly bear.

The Hervey Bay family have suffered the loss of a child, had major problems with their second pregnancy and had daughter Connie diagnosed with a complex heart disease.

Now, Gemma herself has been battling bowel disease and her recent diagnosis of breast cancer.

Rally for a Cause has been supporting the family financially so that they can concentrate of Gemma’s treatment.

GEMMA’S story Gemma and her family have been through so much that most wouldn’t believe!

At 25, Gemma and her partner Ben lost their first child Austin at 28 weeks due to an undiagnosed bowel disease.

Her official diagnosis of bowel disease came a few months after losing Austin in February 2016.

Then on April 4, 2017, Reuben was born at 5lbs 10 ounces, at 37 weeks, due to him not growing anymore.

Gemma battled with her bowel disease all the way through her pregnancy with lots of changes in medication to make sure the pregnancy lasted until birth.

Connie was then born on May 9, 2020, with various complex and rare heart conditions. She had two major surgeries in the first seven months of her short life.

Unfortunately, this time the stress of pregnancy had taken its toll on Gemma.

She awoke after the 10-hour long surgery only to be told the operation didn’t work and that she would have to live the rest of her life with an ileostomy bag.

So, 2021 came along and the family was optimistic that things could only get better.

It started out well with the family heading out on the camping trip they had always dreamed of.

Then in February, more bad news struck the family!

Gemma found a lump on her left breast and went for an ultrasound, which led to a biopsy that confirmed Grade 3 invasive ductal carcinoma.

Another lump was also found which came back as a different type of breast cancer.

Now Gemma and her family face another battle with having two primary breast cancers to treat.

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After five years of trying to get her ulcerative colitis under control and trying every medication available for it, she went in for surgery in November 2020 to hopefully remove the disease.

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radiation treatment.

Despite all this, their family and wonderful support crew remain positive and offer whatever they can to help from babysitting to making meals for the family.

To find out more about the charity and how you can held families like the Lightbody’s, head to www.rallyforacause.org. au or www.dungaderby.com.au. Find them on Facebook under 'Dunga Derby by Rally for a Cause'

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19

LOCA L MUS I CI A N

HARDING’S HOUSE

Have you all, always been musical?

Yeah, well the Harding family has always played music.

Robbie and I (Nicole) grew up going to gigs with Mum and Dad, and there were always instruments around the house.

In contrast, Shane didn’t get his first drum kit until he was 17 years old but it was all he had ever wanted. His Mum used to find him banging on pots and pans in the kitchen as a toddler.

What/who are you/the bands musical influences?

Definitely our parents, Steve and Mikelle Harding. Between the three of us, our tastes in music are very eclectic. We all have very different but often overlapping music that we enjoy, from old Eagles classics, heavy metal Slipknot, mumble rap, Aussie bands like Sticky Fingers, the list goes on.

That’s probably why we have such a unique sound, we all bring such versatility to the table.

What/who are you listening to right now?

Well we’ve been asked to open a gig for nationally renowned Sydney band Bootleg Rascal at the Old Bundy Tavern on August 14th, so although we’ve always loved the

20

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band we are giving them a lot of time at the moment. We saw Thirsty Merc live in May and ever since then we have been obsessed with them too.

Favourite line from a song?

That’s such a big question, we couldn’t possibly pick any one line from other people’s music, but Nicole wrote another original recently. Every time we played this one line, “The grass feels perfect, so I plant my feet” Robbie was just obsessed. We’re really excited about that song.

How often does the band practice?

We have been recently. We all work and have families so at times it’s a challenge, but with this inspiring upcoming gig, we’re all really excited about playing our originals again.

Which instruments do you play?

Robbie and Nicole both play guitar and sing, but Robbie plays guitar better. Shane can play anything from congas to a drum kit to the kitchen sink- anything is a percussive instrument. For the Bootleg Rascal gig, our mum will actually be accompanying us on bass, and Dad has a recording

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What gig past, future or present would you like to have been to/go to?

I (Nicole) bought tickets for Shane and I to see Bush, Live and Stone Temple Pilots at the Under the Southern Stars festival. Sadly it’s been cancelled twice now due to COVID. There are a number of local and international acts we would all love to see, so here’s hoping the Australian music industry is able to recover and get back up and running as soon as possible!

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If you could play any gig or venue, where would you play?

Ideally we would love to be invited to play at vibrant, intimate, family friendly festivals like Woodford Folk Festival.

Aside from that, we’re really excited to host an EP Launch gig, hopefully later this year. That gig will be a massive achievement for us when the time comes!

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21

LO CA L A RTI S T

by Shaun Ryan

TELLING STORIES AND KEEPING MEMORIES ALIVE

Jeremy Roach

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Knowing his artwork is always on display is one of Jeremy Roach’s main motivators.

While many people’s minds jump to paintings, drawings and sculptures when they hear the word ‘art’, Jeremy’s canvass is the human skin.

As a tattooer working out of Talisman Tattoo in Main Street, Pialba, Jeremy helps customers express themselves, keep memories alive and tell their most personal stories through his art.

“Tattooing has always kind of been in the family. My dad was a tattooer – and I am currently working for someone who worked with him,” Jeremy explained.

“I never had much of an interest in becoming a tattooer until I got my own tattoos and that really sparked the interest.”

Jeremy’s approach is to be as accommodating as possible to all his customers.

“I want to be able to accommodate as many different styles or types of tattoos as possible but my interests are in anime so that’s something I really enjoy doing,” he said.

Tattooing for Jeremy is not just a case of leaving a permanent mark on a customer’s body.

“We are telling people’s stories,” he said.

“It doesn’t matter what the tattoo looks like, there is always a backstory that we might not know.”

One memorable tattoo Jeremy was asked to recreate was of a butterfly drawing.

“I didn’t really understand why the customer wanted a children’s drawing of a butterfly tattooed permanently on her.

“But then when we started talking, I realised it was the last thing her child had drawn before passing away and she wanted to keep it with her forever. For someone seeing the tattoo it might mean very little but to her it was everything.”

“The meaning and importance of an artwork is always derived from the individual getting the tattoo.”

Jeremy said tattooing is like any profession or artform in that he has artists he looks up to and aspires to be like.

“People who get tattoos are walking billboards. So many conversations are started by people discussing their artwork – what it means, how long they’ve had it and inevitably who did it.”

Meanwhile, Jeremy said the taboo around tattoos has definitely started falling away since the rise of social media.

Instagram and Facebook are helping people decide on designs and artists before they even step inside a shop.

“You can follow the whole process of getting a tattoo from start to finish on social media. The stigma is being lifted and people who come in to get their first tattoo are a lot more confident.”

And it’s that experience that’s important for Jeremy.

“Someone can come in and get a tattoo, the design could be exactly what they want and look like they had envisaged, but if they don’t have a good experience with you, they’ll probably go somewhere else the next time.”

You can follow Jeremy’s artwork on social media, he’s @jeremyroachtattooer on Facebook and Instagram.

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23

EDUCA TI O N

Carinity Education Glendyne school chaplain Mark Macrae has been supporting students at Carinity Education Glendyne in Hervey Bay for more than a decade.

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Chaplain helps students break cycle of disadvantage

M

ark Macrae has taken a “roundabout way” to working with young people.

The former fruit farmer has volunteered at a drug and alcohol recovery centre, was involved in prison ministry, worked in residential care, and taught agriculture.

He is now chaplain at Carinity Education Glendyne, an independent school in Hervey Bay which provides education, vocational training and life skills for teenagers having difficulty succeeding in mainstream schools.

“Staff refer students to me who need a bit of extra support.

A lot of that need comes about from the majority of students having had learning difficulties, disengaged from school, or come from challenging backgrounds,” Mark said.

“I have a job that’s a lot more varied than chaplains in state schools. I catch up with students who need support and do home visits to support families.

“I’m in a very privileged position because when I ask a student to have a supervised chat, they can be free to talk to me about anything in confidence.”

Previously a youth worker and agriculture teacher at Carinity Education Glendyne, Mark has been the chaplain at the school at Nikenbah for almost a decade.

“Working in an environment like this we rejoice in the little wins and the little improvements that we see students making,” he said.

“We see that turn into something substantial in the end when our students are able to break the cycle of disadvantage from which they originate.”

Carinity Education Glendyne students have expressed their gratitude for the support that Mark has given them.

Harley says Mark “was very supportive when I wasn’t feeling right”, while fellow student Zara believes the chaplain is a “very genuine” person who “dedicates his time to each student to help them change their life for the good”.

“I was a very troubled girl before I enrolled at the school.

With support from the staff, youth workers and Mark the chaplain … I am a more happy person overall,” Zara said.

Mark’s chaplaincy work extends to assisting school staff to maintain their mental health, particularly with the extra demands of teaching and supporting students during the COVID-19 crisis.

“Staff can experience high stress levels at times, so for those who aren’t doing so well I am a listening ear for them,” Mark said.

As well as students requiring special assistance, Carinity chaplains also support some of Queensland’s most vulnerable including people in hospitals and prisons, and aged people living in residential care.

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25

OCEAN SEA

WHALE WATCH & EC The Boat Club’s captain Phil House and the crew of the Amaroo (aka “the Rainbow Boat”) are excited to welcome the majestic giants back to whale bay. “We’re looking forward the humpbacks arriving, and educating guests on our very special Whale Heritage Site. They have really bounced back in recent years and it’s great to see more and more whales each year, and arriving earlier! Nothing beats whale season in Hervey Bay, my favourite time of year.” Board the Amaroo for a half-day whale watch including morning/afternoon tea, guaranteed sightings, expert commentary, and discounts off food at The Boat Club!

www.boatclubadventurecruises.com.au Phone 07 4197 8766

Freedom Whale Watch offers an Eco-Accredited full day tour from 9:30am to 4pm daily from mid July to late October in the calm waters between Hervey Bay and Fraser Island.

Delicious morning tea of Profiteroles and hot scones, jam and cream is served on the way to the whale watching area. Tasty plated lunch, hot chicken wings, two cold meats, three salads and warm rolls is served with whales playing nearby in Platypus Bay. Educational whale commentary from highly experienced skipper during the day.

Afternoon tea of fresh fruit and cheese platters is available on the return trip to the marina.

www.freedomwhalewatch.com.au Phone 1300 879 960

Cruise the sheltered waters of Platypus Bay whilst taking in breathtaking sights as we travel along the beautiful white sandy banks of Fraser Island’s beaches to the whales’ playground. Feel the excitement and anticipation as we get closer to the sanctuary, scanning the horizon for our first splash or blow from a mighty humpback. Loud tail and pec slaps, spectacular breaches, curious spy hops and close encounters are just some of the antics these majestic animals display to keep you captivated. Come aboard and join our friendly crew on a magical day surrounded by nature.

www.spiritofherveybay.com Phone 1800 642 544 26

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ASON 2021

CO TOURS Guide Join us on the Milbi, and be guided thought the calm waters of the Great Sandy Strait.

Search for turtles, dolphins and dugongs, and time is set aside to explore, swim or just relax upon the shores of the beautiful islands. It’s here you’ll receive a very warm Welcome to Country by your local Indigenous guide, hear stories from the Dreamtime and listen to the enchanting sounds of the Didgeridoo. The Milbi has glass panels so you can view the beautiful coral reef from the comfort of the vessel or even have a snorkel.

Morning tea and light lunch provided.

www.milbi.com.au

Phone 07 4125 6888

Tasman Venture is an award winning, family owned, tour operator that specialises in up close and personal Whale Watching and K’gari experiences.

Half Day Whale Encounters - Tours depart twice daily. Travel on a fast and luxurious catamaran to the whale watching grounds in the fastest possible time, meaning more time with the whales. Includes our NEW & FREE Whale Warrior Program on all tours.

Full Day Remote Fraser Island and Whale Experience - Experience the unique and untouched remote west coast of K’gari and enjoy up close and personal encounters with majestic Humpback whales. Tour includes swim with the whales when conditions permit.

www.tasmanventure.com.au Phone 1800 620 322

Be one of the few not the many! With over 35 years experience in the marine mammal field, we offer one of the most comprehensive whale watching tours in Queensland. Travelling aboard a comfortable multi award winning sailing vessel allows guests to feel like they are in the heart of the humpback whale playground.

Join Hervey Bay’s leading marine mammal specialists for an experience of a lifetime. Your full day tour includes morning and afternoon tea, full buffet lunch and a complimentary drink. Our quality and experience sets us apart from the rest. K’gari (Fraser Island) Half Day Eco Sailing Adventures and Champagne Sunset Sails from November to beginning of July.

www.bluedolphintours.com.au Phone 07 4124 9600 Alive Magazine Wide Bay |

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27

LO CA L BUS I NES S

by Shaun Ryan

fun & FREE EVENTS HOSTED EXCLUSIVELY BY LATITUDE25

Make the move to Hervey Bay and experience Latitude25 for yourself – a luxury lifestyle community with huge RV garages. While you’re there, join in the fun and festivities of all the free events at NomadFest 2021.

RSVP TODAY! CALL 1800 025 025 OR PICK UP YOUR FREE EVENTS CALENDAR AT NOMADFEST.COM.AU With limited seats, bookings are essential.

16 July – 27 august hervey bay

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#LAT25NOMADFEST2021

Lychee Divine

BY NAME AND REPUTATION

T

ucked just off the Bruce Highway near Tinana South is a thriving local business that puts the Fraser Coast on the map – right where it matters most.

Lychee Divine is well-known for its ice-creams but as the only lychee manufacturer in Australia, it has so much more to offer travellers and locals alike.

The business is run by John and Kerry Pool and their son and daughter-in-law.

Having said that though, their grandchildren are also always eager to lend a helping hand on the farm whenever possible!

Lychee Divine is a major drawcard and attraction in itself, acting as one of the first ports of call for visitors to the region.

“Our ice-creams get people off the highway, which is great for us and the rest of the community,” said Kerry.

But after getting out of their cars and exploring the business, eyes are opened to the extensive offering of lychee products and condiments for sale at the winery.

Ice-creams and lychee liqueur are the signature products but there is also a huge demand for sparkling lychee wine, condiments – including chutneys – and Lychee Divine’s range of sauces and vinegars.

The first liqueurs made from 800kg of hand-peeled lychees were bottled in 2010.

All 900 bottles were sold out within six weeks. Let’s just say the operation has expanded from there!

LYCHEE HILL

Kerry said they understand the importance of their location in terms of getting people into the community.

“We are a big business but we are always talking about other attractions on the Fraser Coast. We want people who pull over at Lychee Divine to explore the region and drive into Maryborough and Hervey Bay,” she said.

“We ask visitors where they’re travelling to and we share exciting things to do with them.”

Kerry urged locals who have never stopped at Lychee Divine to give them a visit.

The venue is also a place where you can meet with friends or family for a coffee and tea.

“Our shop is a destination and we get many of the local aged care facilities booking day visits for their residents,” said Kerry.

Despite being a well-established business on the Fraser Coast, Kerry said the family was always looking to invest in the business and plan for the future.

Lychee Divine recently moved into a new building – don’t worry it’s located on the same premises – and strategies are always in place to ensure a constant supply of lychees.

Kerry said they freeze up to a third of the lychees grown on the farm so they’re always able to manufacturer their ice-creams, liqueurs and other products - even when the fruit are out of season.

Drop in at the Lychee Divine store at 22473 Bruce Highway, Tinana South or visit their website at www. lycheedivine.com.au.

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AUSTRALIAN GROWN & PRODUCED 22473 BRUCE HWY, TINANA SOUTH . (07) 4121 7757 . DAILY 9AM-4PM | OPEN 7 DAYS OR SHOP ONLINE Alive Magazine Wide Bay |

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29

ECO L I VI NG

by Ingrid Gorissen

GO GREEN FOR BETTER WELLBEING W

hile I hailed from the wonderful Netherlands, I am so incredibly grateful to have had the opportunity to call Australia, and Hervey Bay, home for the past 20 years.

When I realised the theme for this month’s Alive column was ‘gratitude’, the song I Still Call Australia Home instantly popped into my head.

I always get emotional hearing the words because I realise how important the feeling of ‘home’ is to me.

It’s one of the many reasons I choose to be an interior designer with an emphasis on eco design.

Home is where the heart is, a home is about family, lifestyle, people, and connection!

I have never stopped loving my birth country but living here in Hervey Bay is where I truly feel connected to my surroundings, along with a love for the country and its people.

For me, it’s the care for land and people and the knowing the difference it can make to our overall well-being however, motivations for designing more sustainable homes are numerous.

More people suffer from allergies, so their motivation is creating a healthier environment with natural materials.

Other people might be living in a house that’s either freezing cold or boiling hot, and that motivates them to seek out a sustainable renovation that they hope will solve their problem – and the good news is that yes, there are heaps of things that can be done to create happier and healthier living spaces.

Ecologically sustainable homes tend to be worth a lot more on the market, so there may also be financial reasons to go down that road.

A well-designed home can bring health and happiness to your life, which is why it’s important to think seriously about the way we build our homes and living in ways that can be kinder to the planet.

A question that we at Vivere Homes get asked often is; Can you renovate with a focus on sustainability?

Hervey Bay has an almost perfect climate and the most beautiful flora and fauna.

For new builds, the most important step is to design a home and get the aspects right.

Afterall, we only get one chance at it!

Oceans, beaches, subtropical forests, dams, wildlife … we are so blessed!

That’s why we need to carefully consider the way we live and the impact this makes on the environment.

Eco-friendly, green or sustainable; it’s all pretty much the same thing – and it could be the solution if we want lower bills and create healthier, more comfortable living spaces.

Sustainability means different things to different people. For some homeowners, it might mean seeking out old materials to re-use, installing a few solar panels or growing a vegetable garden in the backyard.

The question is why should you introduce ‘greener’ areas to

30

your living spaces?

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If your home is difficult to heat or cool, or it has layout issues, a renovation with a sustainable focus could create a much more comfortable and functional living space.

Natural elements like sun, wind, light and shade are free and using them right, a beautiful healthy climate can be created inside your home.

Insulation is the next important step.

Implementing all this will make your house warmer or cooler at the right times.

A good floor plan design is also key. Opening the space allows for airflow, but you have to be careful not to make it too ‘open’ or you lose a lot of energy. Flexible, clever design solutions where you can open and close spaces off to heat specific areas are ideal.

The concept of green architecture is quite beneficial. So

when you are thinking of building a new home, why not spend some extra time and build something that will not just give you shelter but will also make a positive impact to your health, pocket and the overall standard of living.

For me, the heart of why I do what I do, is people and their surroundings.

After living in the Netherlands - where I worked inside a building with hardly any connection to the outdoors, and where the weather was often miserable, grey and dark - I know the effect it can have on a mental wellbeing.

It was one of the reasons for the green building study and the move to Australia.

I strongly believe that everything happens for a reason, so for me, I am inspired to everyday learning when it comes to: • Connecting with nature • Understanding place

• Understanding natural process

• Understanding natural environmental impact • Understanding people

I can then pass on my skills, knowledge and experience to my wonderful clients.

BUILDING, RENOVATING AND DESIGNING QUALITY HOMES TO CO-EXIST WITH THE ENVIRONMENT.

PHONE: 0417 067 592 EMAIL: INGRID@VIVEREHOMES.COM.AU VIVEREHOMES.COM.AU Alive Magazine Wide Bay |

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31

HE A L TH HUNTER

by Rhian Hunter

BRIDAL BLESSINGS G

ratitude is a thankful appreciation for what one receives or the goodness that we experience in our lives, whether tangible or intangible. Through gratitude we can connect to something larger than ourselves as individuals, whether to other people, nature or a higher power.

You can feel and express gratitude in multiple ways. You can apply it to the past (retrieve memories and be thankful for past blessings), the present (not taking good fortune for granted as it comes), and to the future, by maintaining a hopeful and optimistic attitude.

As I write this article, I sit on one of our connecting flights to Tasmania and am feeling overwhelmed with gratitude.

Thankful that we live in a country that has handled this pandemic so well, grateful that despite snap lockdowns, border restrictions, and several flight changes here we are -

en route to our elopement/honeymoon destination.

It can be hard trying to organise or navigate any major event during a pandemic, and my best advice to anyone doing so is to practice gratitude. For the last fortnight, I remained hopeful and optimistic that things would work out, but I also released attachment to the outcomes, and just counted our blessings that at the very least we and our little family were together, happy, healthy and well.

It is well researched that practicing gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness, so why not start practicing today? Get out your pen and paper and write about something your thankful for, or turn a negative into a positive, or simply thank someone mentally once a day, and watch your mental state grow stronger as a result. I hope you all have lots to be thankful for this month

@healthhunternaturaltherapies

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Image credit: chasethightphotos ( she’s from Hervey Bay too )

H E A L TH Y RE CIPE

PHO

by Rhian Hunter

(VIETNAMESE SOUP NOODLES) SERVES 4 INGREDIENTS: FOR THE BROTH 3L Vegetable Stock 2 Brown Onions (roughly chopped) 5cm Piece Ginger (sliced) 5 Star Anise (whole) 5 Cloves (whole) 2 Cinnamon Sticks 1 TBLS Coriander Seeds (whole) 2 TBLS Tamari 1 TBLS Sesame Oil 2 TBLS Lime Juice METHOD:

1. Cut the tempeh or steak into slices. If using tempeh, fry off the slices in a medium frying pan until golden on both sides. Set aside.

2. Heat olive oil in a stockpot and sauté off the onion until clear add all broth ingredients except lime juice, tamari & sesame oil, bring to the boil.

3. Reduce heat and simmer uncovered for 5-10minutes. Strain the mixture and return the clear broth back to the stove.

4. Add the tamari, sesame oil & lime juice and simmer for a further 5-10 minutes

5. If using meat: Fill really large bowls with noodles, raw sizzle steak shallots, sprouts, herbs & chilli, pour hot broth over the top so meat is covered and cooks.

6. If using tempeh, Fill really large bowls with noodles and pour over the broth. Top with fried tempeh, sprouts, shallots, herbs & chilli.

TO SERVE: 300g Chickpea & Linseed Tempeh (Cut into strips) 100g Thai Rice Noodles 3 Shallots (Thinly Sliced) 2 Cups Bean Sprouts or Sunflower Sprouts 1 Red Chilli (Thinly sliced) Coriander, Thai Basil, Mint Leaves (Optional) Sriracha Sauce (Optional)

Book your Parties, Functions & Christmas Celebrations Now! www.banksiaseafoodgrill.com.au Phone: 4325 4095 381 Esplanade, Torquay, Hervey Bay Open Wed - Sun: Lunch 11.30am - 2.30pm Dinner 5.30pm - 9.30pm

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FI TN E S S

RESET YOUR MIND TO CAN-DO ATTITUDE

Y

ou don’t understand, I can’t do that! What about my injuries? What about my condition? What about my surgery? What about my age? What about my limitations? I’m too anxious. I was told I shouldn’t do that… If you are reading this right now that means you’re breathing and are alive! How awesome is that!

Does anyone wake up in the morning with the thought, “yes, I’m so thankful for this body I have?” Or “I’m so thankful I’m able to move?” We have completely taken it for granted.

A lot of us are focusing on what we CAN’T do rather than what we CAN do. Your body is exactly the way it should be for what you have done to it.

Over the last couple of decades coaching people to their health and fitness goals, we have noticed quite a trend with people focusing on the negatives rather than the positives.

Recently a few people have mentioned they can’t squat or lunge because of their bad knees or they are too old to be doing that. I mention to them that we train a guy who has had two knee replacements, 13 knee surgeries and can still squat 90kg, does walking lunges and is 64 years old. That’s just one example.

My point is … look at the things you can do and STOP making excuses to not look after the amazing body you do have!

Let’s look at modification and alternatives. This is where an experienced strength and conditioning coach can help.

If you have some bad joints, what are the ways to strengthen muscles around those joints safely? Here are some examples of what we are talking about: there are many exercises that rely more on the hips than the knees for

by Josh Hoodless www.teamlift.com.au

lower body training.

What is a non-impact way of doing cardio-vascular exercise? Try cardio machines, such as a rower or air bike, or even go for a swim. What is the best way to train the hinge (deadlift) with lower back issues? Got bad shoulders? How can we train pain-free upper body exercises that are not only safe but healthy for the shoulders?

Hopefully you’re getting my point. If you have a broken arm doesn’t mean you can’t exercise, you still have another arm and two good legs. Injuries are a temporary setback that allow us to focus on other areas of our health and fitness.

You might wake up having a bad day. You might be suffering with issues like anxiety and depression. Your mental state can stop you from exercising and preparing healthy meals to fuel your body. Remember, it’s a choice to take those negative feelings and start putting yourself down.

Having gratitude can truly change your mindset and the way you start looking at yourself on those low days. Start by becoming aware of all the ways your body CAN move.

If there is something you CAN’T do, then what is something you CAN do?

Do that and be grateful for it. What do you think your future unhealthy immobile self would say to you right now?

The more you realise that your body is worth taking care of the more you will start to care about the importance of exercise.

If you spend more time being grateful for what your body can do for you, then you will have less time tearing it down.

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35

L I VI NG WEL L

by Bec Dudley

Gratitude IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH

I

have read gratitude is a warm feeling of thankfulness towards the world, or towards specific individuals. A person who feels gratitude is thankful for what they have and does not constantly seek more.

What does gratitude look like when disaster strikes?

It’s easy to feel grateful when life is good, but when disaster strikes, gratitude is worth the effort.

In fact, it is in crisis conditions when we have the most to gain by a grateful perspective on life. In the face of despair, gratitude has the power to bring hope. In other words, gratitude can help us cope with hard times.

But it is vital to make a distinction between feeling grateful and being grateful. We don’t have total control over our emotions. We cannot easily will ourselves to feel grateful, less depressed, or happy. Feelings follow from the way we look at the world, thoughts we have about the way things are, the way things should be, and the distance between these two points.

Being grateful is a choice, a fundamental attitude that endures and is relatively immune to the gains and losses that flow in and out of our lives. When disaster strikes, gratitude provides a perspective from which we can view life in its entirety and not be overwhelmed by temporary circumstances.

@bfree2beschool 36

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Yes, this perspective is hard to achieve – but from my experience it is worth the effort!

Here are 7 ways to have more gratitude in your daily life: 1. Don’t be picky: appreciate everything 2. Keep a gratitude journal 3. Volunteer

4. Practice mindfulness

5. Spend time with loved ones

6. Improve your happiness in other areas of your life 7. Find gratitude in your challenges

How do we teach gratitude to our children?

Let’s keep this simple, each night as you sit to eat dinner as a family go around the table and have each family member share three things they are grateful for today. If you don’t eat dinner as a family (which I would like to suggest you should), why not try this idea as you drop or pick the kids up from school.

Being grateful is one life skill everyone should aspire to obtain because when you walk through life with gratitude your life is full. Gratitude helps us feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve our health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.

Till next month,

Live a Simple Happy and Healthy Life! x

SK I N C ARE

TAKE THE JUGGLE OUT OF

self-care M

aking time for ourselves for self-care can be difficult when we are parents.

More often than not we put our own needs well before our children and a simple trip to have an eyebrow wax can be put off due to not having anyone to watch the kids.

At Serenity Skin Spa, we don’t want you to avoid our spa because juggling the kids is tricky! We want you to bring them in.

Why do you ask?

Well, it’s very simple, in our busy world which often allows us little time to switch off, we want your kids to see you taking time out. We want them to understand the importance of it not only for you, but for them also and that there is no better way for them to learn this than to have them be here with you.

by Abby Blanke

We also want your children to see what real self-care looks like without the perfection and hype social media often portrays. It isn’t the $3000 exotic retreat or the photoshopped images of the perfect face.

It is a constant dedication to giving our bodies time out and nourishment.

Now don’t get me wrong, we aren’t a day-care service!

But if you feel that your kids could sit in our waiting room while you have your appointment, we want you to feel comfortable in doing that, knowing that you have our 100% support.

It’s all about balance and allowing our next generation to see that self-love is perfectly ok and needed in an era of fast-paced lifestyle.

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37

OTHERS MAKE WE CREATE

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TH E B I G C A T CH

SNAP UP CHANCE TO CAST A LINE

A

ugust is a great time of the year for anglers with Winter species in full swing. From August 15, Snapper will be open again with many anglers looking forward to the opening of the season.

We are incredibly lucky to still have the freedom to get out and about on the water here in Queensland, so let’s get amongst it!

Burrum

In the Burrum, New and Full moon tides will be a great opportunity to look for big yellow fin whiting.

Night tides produce the better fish as they are less wary under the cover of darkness. For anglers looking to fish during the day, try walking the flats with some yabbies or poppers. The odd school jew has been reported in the mid-reaches, along with bream and trevally.

Squire can be found out the front of the Burrum around the 8-Mile along with the odd sweetlip, blackall and mac tuna.

by Andrew Chorley

Wide Grounds

Outside Break Sea Spit reports have been a little limited due to some inconsistent weather of late. Crews that have ventured out are reporting some great fishing. Closer to home the northern and southern gutters have produced coral trout, sweetlip, scarlets, parrot and cod. Snapper will be worth a look around the 25 Fathom Hole particularly at night.

Platypus Bay

A tough season on the snapper this year with some crews finding a few fish. Working the yakka schools on the wider grounds has produced a few along with big longtail tuna and golden trevally. Grunter have been about and have taken live baits and soft plastics around the reefs with a few big blackall and cod also about.

Sandy Strait

Local Reefs

Flathead will start to gather in bigger numbers over the coming weeks and are a great target species for anyone fishing the straits and Mary systems.

Snapper have been good inshore before the closure and are always a chance around the Artificial Reef.

Soft plastics are always a safe technique to target flathead as many styles are irresistible to flathead.

The deeper reefs have produced some coral trout over the past few weeks with soft plastic’s working well.

Working the rock bars, trains, mangrove edges and anywhere there is some bait are likely spots to start.

Working the tides will be crucial this week as the bigger tides will see smaller bite times. Other species reported on the local reefs have been sweetlip, jew, trevally and cod.

In the Mary system. a few threadfin salmon and blue salmon have been reported coming in on soft vibes and plastics.

Bream are another species that are in good numbers at present with fish to 1kg being reported from around River Heads. Working the Heads and further down the strait in the creek systems can see anglers rack up a nice little catch.

Whiting should be about also over the full moon try working the flats along the western side of Fraser Island on the start of the flood tide.

Urangan Pier

August generally sees a few big longtail tuna getting around the pier.

Live baiting works best under a balloon or free lining back with the tide.

Bream should be in good numbers with fresh baits and live herring working well. Flathead will also be on offer taking live pike fished next to the Pylons.

Hervey Bay Fly and Sportfishing

www.herveybaysportfishing.com.au

Tony with a coral trout caught he hooked off Rooney’s Point while out on the water with Hervey Bay Fly and Sportfishing.

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39

SMA RT MONEY

by Kodie Axelsen

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RELISH IN THE THINGS YOU HAVE

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W

e live in a fast-paced world where instant gratification is becoming more of a baseline for our lifestyle. If we want something we get it straight away and we pay for it later.

support local because they appreciate the business themselves.

I come from a family who has owned small businesses and I see the customers that can complain about prices and this and that, but they do not see the expenses that go into keeping that business open.

Gone are the days from past generations where we saved up for what we wanted, and we bought it with the cash we kept in the sock draw.

They do not see that the profit margin is minimal, and that business is barely staying open. How many businesses had to shut during COVID and then could not reopen because they did not have strong enough financials to borrow money, and they did not have enough money in the bank to support the loss.

It is so relevant, isn’t it? The world has got so fast paced that people do not wait for anything anymore. If you want it, you want it now. Lavish lifestyles and materialistic things are thrown in peoples face every day through marketing and social media, Instagram and Facebook.

People then want to “keep up with the Jones” and find themselves in mountains of debt trying to live up to the lifestyle they feel they deserve or want. At what point did materialistic things become so important that people have lost their ability to be grateful for the things they already have? I see it often in my profession. People taking out personal loans and credit cards that are solely used to keep up with their spending habits to buy more ‘things’ or live a lifestyle they simply can’t afford.

We have been brought back to a reality that has grounded many individuals into realising that ‘things’ don’t matter. Our mental and physical health matter.

The fact that we have a roof over our heads matters. That we have access to food and water and amenities. There are people now living homeless due to the losses they have incurred through the last year.

Showing gratitude is a kind head nod to the life you have.

I practice it myself and with my children often. At the end of the day don’t worry about ‘things’ and ‘stuff.’ Don’t put yourself and your family into a bad financial position to just have ‘things’ and live a lifestyle you can’t afford.

We are a lucky bunch living in Australia. We live in one of the best countries in the world. Our families and friends have at some point in their lives utilised the Medicare system or Centrelink whether it be during Covid-19 when people lost jobs and businesses or when they have had a baby and applied for maternity or paternity leave.

It doesn’t mean you can’t strive to have them, but as I will always say, make sure you make an informed decision and use your money wisely. You trade so much time for money in this lifetime so make sure you spend it well.

As much as people complain about either, it is these systems that support our way of living that people should be grateful for. Until you need it you will never fully understand the need for it.

There are many local businesses that would love to have you. Take your family there for a nice meal and throw some of your own gratitude out in the world for the lovely place we live in.

If there is anything Covid-19 has taught us it is that we need to support the local small business owner. They are the life of small towns like Hervey Bay and Maryborough, and they are the conscious community members who

After all what goes around comes around!

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Photos credit: Tourism and Events Queensland

DE STI N A TIO N www.frasercoasttravel.com.au

by Brooke Wilson

TURNING ON THE CHARM

Toowoomba

Not long returned home, a recent trip to my hometown of Toowoomba to visit family has given me much to be grateful for. Having grown up there, there is always the sense of nostalgia upon returning, and while I didn’t get out and about much this time, there is still plenty to see and do.

Toowoomba has a special kind of allure, that keeps people coming back year after year.

During spring, the city comes alive for the Carnival of Flowers held over the month of September. Gardeners or simply appreciators of pretty things will enjoy wandering the many parks, packed to the brim with a stunning array of flowers and plants, in all colours you can imagine.

Queens Park and Laurel Bank Park are particularly good.

Each year, you can also join in on the Food and Wine Festival, held over a three day period coinciding with the carnival. Enjoy live entertainment and a dizzying choice of food vendors for a fantastic night out.

Of course, Toowoomba has much more to offer than just its festival. Sometimes referred to as a ‘Little Melbourne’ for its food and arts scene, the city is packed full of quaint little cafes, hole-in-the-wall coffee shops, alleyway art, boutique stores, and a thriving music scene.

Scattered all around the city are murals and paintings up the sides of buildings, down alleys, and tucked into all sorts of places. Those wanting to check out the art can pick up a map specially designed to follow the art trail, which will take you all over the city.

Avid coffee lovers and those who are a little extra picky about their coffee (like me!) are spoiled for choice, as amazing coffee is easy to come by. My personal favourite is Grinds Espresso Rail, a tiny hole-in-the-wall coffee shop wedged in the main street. For something slightly out of the ordinary, try their Turkish delight mochas - they are divine!

With Toowoomba perched at the top of the Great Dividing Range, it offers the opportunity for walkers to get out and about, with both Tabletop Mountain and Redwood Park being popular walks. Challenging adventurers with steep slopes, rocky escarpments, even a little rock climbing, both will reward walkers with spectacular views across the range and Lockyer Valley.

It’s easy to see why Toowoomba attracts thousands of visitors, first time and returning travellers year after year.

So if you haven’t been, be sure to make the trip down to Toowoomba soon, as it will be sure to find its way into your heart.

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43

FROM THE S H E D

by David Everett

A LESSON IN grace T

here are many teachable moments in life and even more learning moments.

Big or small, hard or gentle, these moments are all around us. They can come out of the blue, crashing down on you in a moment where everything becomes different. Other times there are lessons that comes upon you gently until the moment of realisation.

Much like a friend creeping up you and sticking their wet finger in your ear. I remember that being called a ‘wet willy’ though I don’t know if that term is still in use.

The reaction from both victim and perpetrator is no doubt still the same as it was way back when but yeah, calling out “wet willy” while your friend screams and madly rubs the side of their head may get you in a bit of trouble.

Teachable moments are less common and more likely to be buggered up than learning moments. Teachable moments aren’t always actually teachable moments though, especially when it’s “mansplaining”. Refer to the bottom of the column for the explanation.

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You can’t teach someone something if they don’t want to learn, and that’s speaking from experience on both sides of the fence. That doesn’t mean give up on teaching a lesson, absolutely keep recognising those moments and use them positively but perhaps bide your time or find another way to show the lesson.

Over my years with the Queensland Ambulance Service I’ve had the privilege of mentoring many student Paramedics, both formally and informally, and been mentored by many others.

Some of the best lessons though came from observing a practice or behaviour and thinking ‘no way in hell am I doing it like that’. Also lessons from my mistakes, and oh there have been some doozies! Nothing that has caused harm thankfully but by damn there was some embarrassment and humbling from them.

My all time favourite out of the blue teaching moment came when working with a 3rd year Student Paramedic and responding to a 56-year-old who was 40 weeks pregnant and in imminent delivery.

The lesson was ’observation before action’. What he saw when we walked in the front door was a women in labour laying on the couch with legs spread about to deliver a baby and his immediate response was to kneel between her legs ready to catch while asking pertinent questions.

What I saw though was a rather dishevelled older lady nakedly straddling the couch who appeared quite relaxed and exposing a relatively flat belly. The look on his face once I managed to catch his eye and signal that perhaps he may want to stop and assess the actual situation was priceless and still makes me giggle to this day.

For myself, I still hold massive gratitude for a women whose name I don’t recall but gave me two lessons I’ll never forget. There I was, a 20-year-old in my new car turning left at an intersection. I thought I heard the car in front to take off so with my head turned to the right looking for oncoming traffic, I accelerated away only to rear end the car in front which hadn’t actually moved off as I thought.

That was the first lesson learnt: always look in the direction you are driving in. I looked forward and saw a shiny silver sports car with the word PORSCHE emblazoned across the now crumpled rear end. I sat there in horror and watched the women get out of the now less than pristine luxury car with her face contorted in rage.

Then came the second lesson: how to respond to an accident. This woman who’s expensive car, I had just caused significant damage to was able to pause, swallow her anger and then demonstrate genuine concern for my wellbeing.

This now nameless woman’s rage was understandable but she didn’t care that I had damaged her car, that I had insurance or not, only that I was ok. I have never forgotten the lesson that lovely woman and have followed it when the roles have been reversed.

For that, I am grateful!

*Mansplaining is a very real phenomena. It’s like teaching someone to suck eggs but adding in a generous splash of misogyny and arrogant stupidity through failing to recognise that the woman you are ‘helpfully educating’ actually knows a hell of a lot more on the subject than you do and sure as hell doesn’t need your comparative ignorance pushed onto her. Eg: Sit down, shut up and listen to someone who actually really knows the subject.

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45

PA RENTI NG

RELISH IN THE MESSY MOMENTS

by Amanda Coop

O

nce upon a time, there were two perfectly sane, normal human beings. Their house was tidy, life was uneventful but civilised.

And then they had a baby, and nothing was ever the same again. They were always tired, life was chaotic, and the mess was out of control. So, what did they do? Why, they had another one, of course.

It is a true story for so many of us. How is it we can be so tired and totally over it, while simultaneously gushing about how our kids are the greatest thing ever?

I guess the survival of the human race is dependent on us thinking our kids are pretty spesh, even when they’re acting like Gremlins who’ve been fed after midnight.

It’s funny how all the Gremlinesque moments can be simply erased by a kiss, cuddle, kind act or funny moment.

As we reach the end of a three-week school holiday break, I look around the diabolical state of our house and remind myself that I am lucky. Lucky to have a house, for one thing. And the belongings that are strewn from one end to the other may be irritating, but they are evidence that we have all our needs and many of our wants met.

There is a tent in our living room, which the kids had fun not sleeping in the other night, invading the parental bed in the early hours of the morning while apparently forgetting their own beds still existed.

The remnants of my son’s “office” have taken over the

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coffee table, after he and his big sister played a game pretending to be jail wardens (and might I say, pity help us all if they ever enter law enforcement for real, though it was hilarious to watch).

Have I made the kids clean up? Yes.

Have I cleaned up (multiple times)? Yes.

Does it all just come back the next day? Also, yes.

I have now given up in the knowledge that their return to school is imminent and I may be able to sit on the couch without having a Minecraft sword light up under my butt.

I’m biding my time until I can chuck out the latex glove that has been filled with water, tied off and decorated with Sharpie into a … something. Jellyfish, maybe? I’m quite surprised it hasn’t sprung a leak already, but it’s an almost certainty that something tragic will befall the jellyfish while its owner is at school next week.

In the scheme of things, I realise these are petty complaints. My biggest stroke of luck is just having these lovely kids. I imagine anyone struggling with fertility would gladly swap my woes for theirs, and parents of sick kids would be only too thrilled if their children gained the strength and vitality to make a big, glorious mess.

And funnily enough, when Monday rolls around and I get some peace and quiet, I’ll be missing them (but probably not the jellyfish.)

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47

L I FE CHA T WI TH M I CH E L L E

by Michelle Robinson Bach. Counselling.

Dip. Clinical Hypnotherapy

M

y column this month highlights an issue that impacts family relationships and the broader community. However, it’s often our kids who find themselves in the front-line of this issue, and I have found myself wondering if they are getting a bit of a raw deal.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Let me explain.

The subject for discussion, is ‘Manners’. (The old fashioned Please, Thank you and You should be grateful version of manners that still thrives in many families today.)

I must confess, that it was my own behaviour that caused me to re-evaluate the way we teach our children ‘good manners’.

Our beautiful four-year-old granddaughter, Emilia, has just spent almost a week visiting Poppy and Grandma (that’s my husband, John and me).

On Monday morning, I asked Emilia, “Would you like a dippy egg and toast soldiers for breakfast?” to which Emilia gave her honest response, “Yes.”

In the same moment that I became aware of myself speaking, I automatically countered her response with, “You mean, ‘Yes please, Grandma’. Don’t forget your manners.”

“Yes, please Grandma,” Emilia dutifully replied, her eyes never leaving the television screen where Bluey was in full flight on the ABC Kids’ Channel.

The awareness that struck me as I asked Emilia to use her manners, was that she had answered my question, perfectly, the first time.

Would she like a dippy egg for breakfast? Yes, she would.

Emilia turned four only two weeks ago. Her answer was truthful and required no addendums that implied she should be grateful to me for asking her in the first place.

Yet, I unconsciously felt the need to make a point about manners that was completely lost on her. If she had asked me to make her breakfast, then ‘Please’ would have been

trustyourintuition.com

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very appropriate. That was not the case, and I was a little ashamed of myself, to be honest, for correcting her.

I later pondered this conversation, trying to gain deeper insights about my behaviour. I concluded that it is easy to teach our kids platitudes that keep the wheels of convention rolling smoothly along. (If you were anything like me, you will have been an expert at telling adults what they wanted to hear since a young age.)

Yet, how frequently is true gratitude ever felt by our kids?

Failure to respond with the expected “Thank you” or “Please” very quickly labels a child rude or disrespectful. Sometimes, I have realized, that’s not fair.

I have decided that while a child can be taught platitudes, gratitude must be felt and, experienced by the one who offers it.

How much more valuable would my interaction with Emilia have been, if I accepted her “Yes” for the appropriate answer it was, and invited her into the kitchen to help me make her egg and toast fingers? She could have seen and experienced my willingness to make her breakfast just the way she likes it. This may have led her to a genuine feeling (even if in later life) of gratitude that her Grandma loves her very much and works to make her happy.

Believe me, I am a supporter of manners, and always have been. However, I have a new awareness of the difference between saying an empty “Thank you” or “Please,” and a genuine expression of gratitude.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could help kids feel and understand the difference? Surely that would be a life-skill worth teaching? The world may then evolve into a kinder place, something each child deserves.

Anyhow, that’s what I’ll be aiming for from now on.

Until next time,

Have a lovely month.

Michelle

AUGUST inspiration

I N SP I RA TI O NS

by Alison Dunlop

Alison’s Guidance this Month:

Gratitude elevates you, opens your mind and makes you a magnet for what you desire!

Capricorn Dec 22 -Jan 19

Cancer June 21- July 22

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18

Leo

Do not allow fear and negativity to take control of your thoughts this month.

Things are not as bad as you think. Flick the negativity, and take time to breathe.

Spend some time outdoors.

Don’t hold back any longer. Now is the time to bring to light all your amazing ideas. Don’t let fear, or the haters stop you.

July 23 - Aug 22

All that glitters is gold! This month, your ideas and plans are coming to fruition.

Enjoy the ride!

Keep your calm this month! Let go of your rigidly fixed ideas. When you surrender the need to control, then you feel more at ease, and things magically work out.

Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20

Virgo

Aug 23 - Sept 22

Aries Mar 21 - April 19

Libra

Sept - 23 - Oct 23

You are moving forward in leaps and bounds. Make sure your intentions are pure. Communication is also highlighted this month.

Success and happiness are yours this month, as long as you remain true to yourself. Be guided by your intuition and all will work out as it should.

Taurus

April 20 - May 20

Have you been dealing with some sort of conflict recently? Take the higher road this month and forgive. You will feel so much better for it.

Gemini May 21 - June 20

August is looking to be quite magical!

You will enjoy a renewed zest for life.

There is a focus on friendships this month.

Wonderful changes are in store for you this month. There could be an exciting chance for romance. Follow your intuition with this, and be on the lookout for inner beauty.

Trust is the word for Libra this month. Trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. Show gratitude, and allow your month to unfold.

Scorpio

Oct 24 - Nov 21

It is possible your love for something is being rekindled this month. You are being reminded that life has its ups and downs, and to just flow with it.

Sagittarius Nov 22 - Dec 21 Watch out for heightened emotions with the full moon this month. Utilise these emotions to tap into your creativity.

Connect also with your intuition.

Alison Dunlop Kinesiologist. Find out more at: www.alisondunlopkinesiology.com.au (The Cards are drawn from Crystal Oracle by Toni Carmine Salerno) Alive Magazine Wide Bay |

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49

K E V’ S A DVENTURE

by Kev the Border Collie

INDULGING IN GRATITUDE

B

eing a dog, one would assume that I would be grateful for everything, but my humans would beg to differ.

It seems that at age 5 I have become an entitled and bossy brat. I have taken to demanding walks and dinner from my human well before the time they are usually provided to the point that I will start asking for dinner around 5pm even though it is rarely ever provided before 6pm.

As soon as it turns 6pm I will stop asking quietly and will use my outside voice to demand food NOW.

As soon as I’ve finished my dinner I will go to the pantry and sniff around the food bin sending strong eye messages that I am a poor starved dog and whatever they fed me was never enough.

I have an equally entitled attitude to walks these days. Although some could confuse my behaviour for excitement, those that really listen to the tone of my high pitched short barks would be right in translating a few very impatient swear words and combined with my uncooperative behaviour when it comes to putting on my harness, they would be accurate in interpreting my obnoxious behaviour as being a spoilt and entitled brat.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do acknowledge that I am a very lucky dog and live in more luxury than most dogs, but maybe I have become this way due to having such an easy life as I’ve had everything I ever needed anticipated and offered without me lifting a paw.

I have never had to hunt for my own dinner, I don’t have to protect myself form predators or competitors and like some domestic dogs I don’t even fear my humans as they have never caused me harm, except that one time when they clipped my nail a tiny bit too close.

I have even been provided with luxuries well beyond my basic needs – I have been educated in the field that suited my interests when I became a therapy dog and that has given me a sense of purpose in connecting with people offering them my love and connection.

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All this gives me a healthy a sense of value and worth, and maybe I’ve spent too much time in human therapy sessions because I’ve learned that knowing your intrinsic value and worth is really important when it comes to knowing what you deserve and being able to ask for it.

Ok so from all of these observations, I’m coming to the conclusion that I have an overdeveloped sense of worth.

Okay, okay, I see where this is going now – I obviously need to practice more gratitude!

Gratitude will help me focus less on myself, and my needs and wants, and more on how amazingly abundant my life is and how lucky I am to have all of these people and things and opportunities.

I can see that all of this stuff and all of these experiences are due to others – those that support me and train me and give me love and safety so that I can go out into the world and do what I do.

Those that grow, make and transport my food and all of my toys and accessories; my numerous water-bowls and water bottles and the clean water that goes into them; even the house I live in was built and maintained by numerous people and if I could even comprehend what went into each of the pieces of the house and all of its contents my big border collie brain would explode with gratitude for all of those beings that contributed to my life and wellbeing . Wow, this practice is endless! The interdependence of my life on other beings is so ingrained I wouldn’t even exist if it wasn’t for so many events coming together.

OMG this is too much – excuse me will I take myself off to contemplate this in my nice and simple dirt patch under the house – ahhh, peace and contentment, all I need right now in this moment is this hollow of cool dirt and this deep feeling of appreciation for all things. Everything else is a bonus.

RE A DE RS ’ G ALLERY

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SHANE’S PICKS FOR

Father’s Day LOUNGE

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DINING

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