AGS Magazine April 1895

llew aeries, 14o. O.

PRICE SIXPENCE.

Zipril, 1895.

CONTENTS.

EDITORIAL AND GENERAL NOTES

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NOTES ABOUT OLD BOYS

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ATHLETIC NOTES

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. 208

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DEBATING SOCIETY FINALE

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A DISTINGUISHED F.P.

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. 213

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AN OLD BOY'S FIRST YEAR AT COLLEGE .

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F.P. DRAMATIC CLUB

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ABJECTS, ORTS, AND IMITATIONS

MORE LEAVES FROM THE JOURNAL OF FOUR INNOCENTS .

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" PLESS TA NEW ORDINANCES".

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AN OLD CRICKET MATCH .

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VIRGIN NOMINATION .

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LITERARY CLUB AND DEBATING SOCIETY

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FOOTBALL REPORTS

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LIST OF OBJECTS GIVEN TO THE SCHOOL MUSEUM .

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ABROAD .

MYSTIFICATION .

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THE

Orammar School Magqine.

New Series.

APRIL, 1895.

No. (i.

EDITORIAL. IT is desired as far as possible that the Magazine should represent the school in all its interests and record the doings of the various clubs, societies, and institutions connected with it. To this end, the co-operation of secretaries and others is necessary. Past and present pupils are earnestly desired to send in notes and contributions on any matters likely to be of interest to its readers, and to make it a more complete reflection of school life. Although it receives a gratifying amount of support, especially from the upper classes of the school, the number of readers might easily be increased, and in the junior classes their number ought to be much larger than it is, while hundreds of former pupils might be added to the list of its subscribers. In regard to this matter also, co-operation is earnestly invited,so as to place the Magazine in the position it ought to occupy and to enable it worthily to hold its place among the magazines of the great public schools.

• Of twelve honours men at the recent Graduation at the University, four were old Grammarians. Of two First Classes in Mental Philosophy, both were Grammarians ; of three First Classes in Classical Literature, one was a Grammarian; and of four Second Classes in this department one, and of three Second Classes in Mental Philosophy one.

The list is as follows :— Classical Literature.—ht Class—A. M. Mackay; 2nd Class— Alex. Duncan.

Mental Philosophu.—lst Class—Wm. M. Macdonald, A. M. Mackay ; 2nd Class—C. Dunn.

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Of the University Prizes, A. M. Mackay carried off the Hutton Philosophy Prize of £30, and the Bain Gold Medal in Mental Philosophy. The Dr. Black Prize of £28 in Latin, also fell to him, through the competitor who was first being ineligible. Alex. Findlay divided with another the Neil Arnott Prize of £35 in Experimental Physics. We have heartily to congratulate Mr. Mackay on gaining the great distinction of double First Class Honours. During the last ten years only three have gained double Firsts, all old Grammarians, viz. :1889—Murdoch Macdonald. 1st Class in Classics and Mental Philosophy.

1892—Alexander R. Gordon.

1895—Alexander M. Mackay.

11 9)

The following old Grammarians have had the degree of M.A. conferred upon them :—Henry Alexander, Patrick G. Allan, George G. Cameron, Wm. F. Croll, Charles J. Davidson, Alexander Duncan. Charles Dunn, Alexander Findlay, Maxwell W. Findlay, Robert W. Lyall Grant, J. W. Lindsay, William M. Macdonald, Alexander M. Mackay, James F. Mackie, Roderick Macleod, Joseph PK. M`Pherson, Duncan Macrae, Frederick H. Petrie, John Smith, Robert Stewart, James P. Wingate.

The following graduated M.B.,C.M. :- -A. Wood, M.A., Peter Harper, M.A., A. Robb, J. M. P. Crombie, T. D. Cumming, J. F. Christie, M.A., G. B. Scott, W. R. Matthews, L. J. Helmrich, Chas. Cameron, H. C. Smith, R. W. Cruickshank.

In the class prize lists also, former pupils are well to the' front. Among those who left in October, George F. Milne was 2nd in Junior Greek and in Junior Latin. Thomas S. Slessor and George L. Barrie 4th and 11th respectively in Greek, and 7th and 8th in Latin. C. Lyall Grant. was 9th in the Logic Class, 3rd in Senior Mathematics, and 3rd in Chemistry.

The Bursary Competition for 1895 is to proceed on the following scheme, whereby (1) the Bursary Competition

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shall be amalgamated with the preliminary examination : and (2) extra papers are sanctioned in subjects where the ' Senatus considers an additional test necessary or desirable :— Full Marks Attainable.

English—As in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (4 hours) 400 Mathematics—Higher Standard, as in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (3i hours); also additional Problem Paper (2 hours) 400 Latin—Higher Standard, as in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (4 hours); also additional paper, including Version (2 hours) 400 Greek—Higher Standard, as in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (4 hours) ; also additional paper : Passages for translation into English and into Greek (2 hours) 400 French—As in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (3i hours) 200 German—As in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (3i hours) 200 Italian—As in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (3 hours) 200 Dynamics—As in Preliminary Examination of Joint Board (3 hours) • 200 Candidates must intimate beforehand the subjects (not exceeding five of the above) which they are going to take.' " No candidate shall be credited with marks in any subject in which he has not obtained such proportion of the total number of marks assigned to that subject as the Senatus may prescribe."

• In view of the possible total of 1,800 for Classieals, classes have been formed in French, German, and Dynamics (3 hours a week). An additional hour a week also is devoted to English.

With regard to the bursary competition also, the University Court has decided to change the time of the ex-.

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amination from October to April, this change to take effect in 1897. The present Classical IV. will thus be the first to go up to the competition in spring.

The first function in the remodelled hall was a lecture on " Montrose's Campaigns" by the Rector on 11th January.

The meeting took place under the auspices of the Literary and F.P. Clubs. Mr. Simpson, in the first place, made some remarks d propos of the surroundings—and the improvements have been the cause of general satisfaction—and lamented the fact that the School possesses so few records of its great past and of its distinguished sons. Mr. Simpson then delivered an interesting lecture; and the exploits of the great commander, who, it was remarked, was considered by so eminent an authority as Dr. Gardiner as more than the compeer of Cromwell in military genius, were made clear by limelight views, as well as by maps and plans of the battlefields which Dr. Gardiner had kindly lent for the purposes of the lecture. Mr. Simpson was unfortunately compelled, through shortness of time, to compress unduly so interesting a portion of Montrose's life as his last campaign.

At the close the Chairman of the School Board (Rev. Professor Robertson) made some remarks, and proposed a vote of thanks to the Rector.

An interesting social gathering—the second annual dinner of the Former Pupils' Club—took place in the Grand Hotel on the 24th of January. As the magazine was not directly represented on this festive occasion, none of its staff having yet gone over to the majority, no adequate record of the feast of reason and flow of soul can be handed down to posterity ; but it is hoped all the same that the F.P.'s will invest their sixpences in an organ which is always delighted to chronicle their doings. Credible rumour says that the Rector presided over the gathering, and that the croupiers were Mr. Alexander Duffus. advocate, and Mr. Hugh F. Campbell, who used to be known to the School in a perfectly legitimate thcugh non-legal relation. There were about thirty of the memLers present, and several of

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the masters. Apologies for absence were read from Principal Sir William D. Geddes and Mr. Martin (former rectors), and from Rev. J. W. Legge. Dr. Williamson, the newspapers report, proposed the toast of " The School," and in doing so commented on its efficient condition. The Rector replied, and the toast of " The Club" was proposed by Mr. Campbell and responded to by Mr. Duffus (vice-president). Dr. Findlay proposed "The Chairman," and Dr. Kelly "The Croupiers." Songs and recitations were given, the report adds, "and the reunion proved a thoroughly enjoyable function."

Another pleasant gathering of the festive season, and one which it is to be hoped will be followed by many others of a similar kind, was the "first social reunion" of the Third Middle Class, 1884-85. A very fair representation of the class was present, and under the genial chairmanship of Mr. Maxwell H. Mackie happiness and gaiety reigned supreme. The toast list was brief and well arranged. " The School " was given by Mr. A. Christie, and acknowledged by Mr. T. T. Watson, who, in the course of a graceful little speech, observed that the gathering on that occasion would have been larger, but that so many of their old classfellows were abroad in the world. The Committee had the intention, however, of making the reunion an annual event, and reckoned on the co-operation of old class-fellows in this means of perpetuating the memory of their connection with the School. Mr. John Kelly gave the toast of " The Class," which was acknowledged by Mr. G. T. Watson ; Mr Robert Rainnie gave " The Masters," which the Chairman responded to ; and " Our Absent Class-fellows " was given

by Mr. J. W. Philipps, and pledged with great enthusiasm. " The Chairman," by Mr. T. T. Watson, completed the list.

Pleasant reminiscences added largely to the enjoyment of the meeting, which was otherwise brightly diversified with musical selections by many of the gentlemen present.

Dr. Moir's papers on " Boece, Melvin, Geddes, Do they ever nod?" have been collected and issued privately in pamphlet form. .

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We hear rumours that a proposal has been under practical consideration for the publication of a history of the School from its foundation, many centuries ago, down to the present time. Such a work ought to be of great interest, not only as regards the School itself, but also with respect to the progress of public education in Scotland. It is understood that a writer than whom no one is more competent to write such a history has been invited to undertake the work.

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We acknowledge receipt of the Fettesian.

NOTES ABOUT OLD BOYS. PROFESSOR John Wight Duff; M.A. (dux and gold medallist,

1882) has just written a Latin song for University students in Newcastle and Durham. It is entitled, " Salve Boreal' Lumen." The words have been set to music by Mr. C. S. Terry, M.A., Clare College, Cambridge, and the dedication of the song has been accepted by Dean Kitchin, who is Warden of the University of Durham.

Surgeon-Lieutenant Charles J. Milne, who passed first into the Indian Medical Service last year, gained the first place in the recent Netley examinations for commissions, with a total of 5,635 marks (664 marks before the next competitor). He also gained the Herbert Prize of la) for the highest marks attained at the Army Medical School, the Montefiore medal and prize of 20 guineas for military surgery, and the Maclean prize for clinical and ward work.

He has proceeded to India. At the same examination, Surgeon-Lieutenant Charles W. Profeit, of the Army Medical Service, passed fifth.

Robert M. Milne, of Jesus College, Cambridge, has gained the Robert Fletcher Scholarship (in Mathematics) in the University of Aberdeen. Candidates for this Scholarship are required to be Masters of Arts of less than two years'

Notes About Old Boys.

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standing, and the successful candidate has to satisfy the Senatus that during the two years for which the Scholarship is tenable, he is prosecuting the higher mathematical or physical studies, either at an English or foreign University, or in such other way as the Senatus may approve.

J. C. Murdoch, M.A., has been appointed to a classical mastership in the Dundee High School.

A. T. Cruickshank, M.A., John E. Rae, M.A., and J. S Shewan, M.A., have passed their final examinations in Law James C. Philip, M.A., has passed the degree of Bachelor of Science.

Mr. James Anderson, who was a pupil of Dr. Melvin, and a distinguished student at Marischal College, where he graduated in 1849, died on 16th February. For more than twenty years Mr. Anderson was the respected schoolmaster and registrar of the parish of Foveran, and it was only through his own modesty that he remained there for so long a period, although many offers of a post in a wider sphere of labour were made to him. Among his many accomplishments he was proficient in a great many languages, ancient and modern, while he was an expert botanist and a noted antiquarian.

The death of Dr. James Fraser, Eastwood, Nottinghamshire, who was just entering upon a promising career, has caused the deepest regret. After leaving the School Dr. Fraser studied medicine at Aberdeen University, and graduated M.B.,C.M. in 1890. He was for some time an assistant at Old Rayne, and a few months ago, after gaining experience in the London hospitals, he proceeded to Eastwood to be an assistant there.

All Grammarians of the last eighteen years will regret to hear of the death of Sergeant Charles Duncan, the respected Janitor of the School. Duncan joined the 93rd

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Sutherland Highlanders in February, 1856, and served in that regiment, under Sir Colin Campbell, all through the Indian Mutiny, including the relief and capture of Lucknow, for which he received the medal and two clasps. He remained in India with the 93rd for some time, and when the regiment was recalled returned with it to Scotland, and was stationed first at Stirling and then at Edinburgh. On the adoption of the territorial system in 1873 he came to Aberdeen, and performed the duties of provost-sergeant at the barracks here for three and a half years. His last military post was that of canteen steward, which he held until discharged on pension in 1877, holding the medal for long service and good conduct. The Lucknow medal and clasps and the good conduct medal were a familiar sight as the annual prize day came round. To successive generations of Grammarians, he was a stern old soldier, with a kindly heart, feared, respected, beloved.

ATHLETIC NOTES. The Sports this year will be held on 26th April. It is to be hoped that the revival of the Sports, after a lapse of four years, will excite enthusiasm, and that there will be many competitors in the different classes. The following is the list of events :— Class 1.--Open Events. Over 16.

Half-Mile.

Throwing Cricket Ball.

Bicycle Race (1 Four-legged Race. mile).

High Jump.

Broad .Jump.

Putting Weight.

Hurdle Race (120 yds., Quarter-Mile.

1 Mile.

10 flights).

100 Yards.

Ham mer.

High Jump.

Hurdle Race.

High Jump.

Hurdle Race.

Class 2.—Aye 16-14.

Half-Mile.

Broad Jump.

Four-legged Race.

Quarter-Mile.

And all Open Events.

Class 3.—Age 14-12.

Four-legged Race. Sack Race.

Broad Jump.

100 Yds. Race.

High Jump.

100 Yards Race.

Class 4.—Age 12-10.

Sack Race.

Four-legged Race.

100 Yards Race.

Bicycle Race.

Obstacle Race.

Bicycle Race.

Obstacle Race.

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Athletic Notes. • 100 Yards Race.

Sack Race.

Class 5.—Age 10-8. / Mile Walking Race.

Four-legged Race.

Obstacle Race.

Class 6.—Preparatory—Under 8.

Sack Race. / Mile Walking Race.

100 Yards Race.

The Entry Money is 6d. for each event. A boy may enter for any event he pleases in any class above his age.

The Games Committee offer First Prizes, with free entry, to Former Pupils, for a Half-Mile Handicap, and 100 Yards Race. Intending competitors are requested to send in their names at once to the Secretary of the F.P. Club.

For the convenience of those engaged in classes, &c., these events will be placed towards the end of the school programme.

The competition in connection with the Sports for drop and place kicking was held on Wednesday, 20th March.

There were only 4 entries for the drop-kick, the competitors being J. Milne, Bisset, Butchart, and A. Milne. The kicking was not very good, Bisset being first with a straight kick of 42 yards. There were 10 entries for the place kick. To obtain full marks for this, competitors had to kick three goals from three separate positions—front, side, and touch line. A. Milne kicked excellently, and scored 8 goals, no other competitor kicking more than six goals.

During the Christmas holidays Mr. Menzies was playing for the Fettesian-Lorettonians against Manchester. From the account in the Fettesian we see that he greatly distinguished himself, being the best of the forwards.

The XV. was photographed on the 16th of March, but the photographs are not very good.

F.P. DRAMATIC CLUB. THE annual performance of

the Former Pupils' Dramatic Club was held in the Hall of the School, on the 1st, 2nd, and 4th March. The hall was completely filled each night,

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and the extra performance on the 4th was rendered necessary to accommodate those who were turned away on the two previous occasions. The first item on the programme was the overture, " Imps' Revels" (Bonheur), which was excellently performed by a small orchestra of violins. This was followed by a comedietta, " Breaking the Ice," which caused much laughter and amusement. The characters were Marton (alias Miss Smith), Miss J. R. Blanche Leslie, and Captain Selby (alias Mr. Jones), Mr. C. Davidson, who both performed their parts in a way that showed off the wit and retort of the dialogue to the best advantage.

The appreciation of the audience was manifested by loud applause at the conclusion of the act. After a Scotch selection by the orchestra, the curtain was rung up on the first act of Douglas Jerrold's comedy " Paul Fry." In the representation of this comedy the Dramatic Club surpassed their performance of last year (the farce " Turn Hill! Out"). and it must be owned that the acting reached a pitch of excellence which was quite unlooked for in such an unpretentious body. Mr. Davidson " caught on " at once, and his . " Dear, dear I just popped in," has wholly supplanted such commonplaces as " Now we live in the top back-room." The scenery and dresses could not have been better, and materially contributed to the success of the piece. We are glad to be able to say that the collections were large enough to leave a balance after paying all expenses, including a supper to the performers. The cast was as follows :— Paul Pry Mr. C. Davidson.

Mr. Oldbutton Mr. G. J. Johnston.

Laura (his ward) Miss Gordon.

Crimp (Laura's maid) Miss M. Gordon.

Captain Haselton Mr. G. W. S. Walker. ..

Sir Spangle Rainbow Mr. R. A. Henderson.

Pommade (his valet) Mr. W. Edmund Bell.

Tankard Mr. J. Hay. Billy Mr. A. A. Black.

Bailiffs, &c.

The life and soul of the piece was Mr. Davidson, and he was ably supported by the other members of the company,

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who all filled their parts in a way that left nothing to be desired. Between the acts Mr. John Clark played, by special request, as a violin solo, the " Bolero," by Hoffmann, and was heartily encored. The whole entertainment was in every way a success, and a credit to the energy and vitality of the Dramatic Club. We hope their next venture will be as excellent and popular as this one was.

DEBATING SOCIETY FINALE. THE session of the Literary Club and Debating Society was

brought to a close on Friday, 22nd March, by a Grand Finale. The new hall was filled with a large and fashionable audience, conspicuous among which were numerous fair friends of the members of the Society. We were also glad to note the presence of several prominent members of the Former Pupils' Club.

After the chair had been taken by Mr. Simpson, the programme was begun with a piano solo—Mendelssohn's " Spring Song "—by Miss Taylor, who very kindly consented to take the place of Miss Millar, who was unavoidably absent. Songs were contributed by Mr. M. H. Mackie— " The Flying Dutchman ; " J. W. Milne—" Lochnagar ; " Mr. H. F. Menzies—" Die Beiden Grenadiere ; " and Murdo Morrison—" Rolling Home to Bonnie Scotland." Encores were loudly demanded from Messrs. Mackie and Menzies.

A special word of praise is due to Murdo Morrison for the courageous way in which, after an apparent failure, he successfully performed his part. Roy Bayspool gave a violin solo, J. J. Johnson a piano solo, and Herr Rein a reading from Mark Twain—" The Awful German Language ' —which was highly appreciated, in spite of the chattering of the junior pupils at the back of the hall.

Mr. Simpson, in a short speech, moved a hearty vote of thanks to the performers, and then spoke a word or two on behalf of the School Library and Reading Room. Apart from a handsome donation of valuable books from the School Board, not a single volume had reached him from

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any Former Pupil, except a copy of the centenary edition of Melvin's Versions from Messrs. Ogilvie and Legge. This was a state of matters that should not exist, and he hoped that Former Pupils would in future remember their old school, and also that the audience would be liberal in the matter of the collection, the surplus of which was to be devoted to the Library. After this speech the second part of the programme was entered upon. This consisted of the trial scene from " Pickwick" in which the parts were as follows :— Mr. Justice Doubtful Sergeant Buzfuz Mr. Snubbin Crier of the Court Mr. Pickwick Mr. Winkle Sam Weller Mrs. Cluppins -

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Jas. Walker.

W. Buttenshaw.

Alan F. Mackenzie.

Kenneth W. Mackenzie.

G. R. Watt.

H. F. Buttenshaw.

W. B. G. Minto.

Jas. Strachan.

The scene was very creditably performed, considering the youth and inexperience of the performers. A special word of thanks is due here to Mr. Alfred Macleod for the time and trouble he expended on the rehearsals. The speech of Sergeant Buzfuz was delivered in a way that would not have disgraced a practised lawyer, and the indignant and reproachful glances of corpulent Mr. Pickwick immensely tickled the fancy of the spectators. The get up and the manner of the three witnesses, Mr. Winkle, Sam Weller, and Mrs. Cluppins, provoked much laughter. " Samivel "polished his tile in a very realistic fashion. Mr. Justice Doubtful, Mr. Snubbin, and the Crier of the Court, successfully maintained the dignity of the legal profession, while another character, of by no means the least importance, was the diminutive but dignified policeman. When the curtain was rung down, the appreciation of the audience ;was evinced by loud and hearty applause.

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A DISTINGUISHED F.P. SIR WILLIAM MACGREGOR, K.C.M.G., M.D., D.Sc., LL.D. OF the many Grammar School boys who have left these shores and found their life's work abroad, in the colonies or on foreign soil, none has risen more rapidly or attained to greater distinction than the first Administrator of British New Guinea. When a Crown Colony was founded in the island about seven years ago, it was Dr. (now Sir) William Macgregor who proclaimed the Queen's sovereignty and undertook the administration of an extent of territory larger than Great Britain. The result of his work speaks for itself. Within the short period of six years, since 1888, he has organised a complete system of government, and has carried out, under his immediate supervision, a scientific survey of the country. With regard to this point, it is interesting to remember that the first scientific explorer of New Guinea was another eminent Aberdonian, Mr. Henry Ogg Forbes, the account of whose travels is a well-known work of recent date. During the work of government and survey, Sir William Macgregor has won the confidence of the natives, who have been treated with strict justice, reconciled them to British rule, put an end to the wars, feuds, and bloodshed of an uncivilized country, and opened up to British enterprise a territory which is in many ways naturally fitted to become a great dependency.

Sir William Macgregor recently visited Aberdeen, and his lecture on New Guinea before the Geographical Society will long be remembered by those who had the fortune to hear it. His University, in recognition of the splendid work which he has done, has just conferred upon him the degree of LL.D., which was never more worthily bestowed.

Macgregor was born in an upper district of Aberdeenshire towards the middle of the century. With no special advantages of school education, he was engaged to a great extent in his young days in agricultural labour. Even then, however, he showed a great thirst for knowledge, and found time to carry on studies, in which, by his perseverance he

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made considerable progress—in fact, young Macgregor might well be the hero of the story which Dr. Gordon Stables recently wrote. It is related that a respected farmer in the Alford district, in engaging him for farm labour, asked a relative, who acted as sponsor for him, what sort of lad he was, and received for answer that he was a good worker, and would give no trouble if he had his books. A considerable library of the higher school-book type was brought to the farm, its contents being devoured when working hours were over. His character and studious ways were not long in attracting attention, and the result was that he came to Aberdeen in the spring of 1866, and entered the Grammar School. For fellow-lodger in a house in Skene Street he had another Grammarian, George Watson Beattie, now Dr. Beattie of Manchester, who was in the Third Class.

Beattie, who had known Macgregor previously, put him through a sort of examination to find out in what class he would probably be placed, the result , being that the second was thought to be the likely one,: though possibly he might scrape into the Third. On the regular test being applied at the School, however, Macgregor was at once admitted into the Fourth Class, and in October he appears as 4th in Latin in the Rector's (Mr. Barrack's) Fifth Class. He even went to the Bursary Competition this year, taking the 61st place. He remained at the School for another year, and came out, in October,.

1867, 5th in Latin and 3rd in Greek in the highest class, and in the list Bursary of that year the second name was that of " William Macgregor, Strathdon, Cushnie Parish School and Grammar School, Aberdeen." It may be mentioned that the first bursar was Mr. Alexander Ogg, that the eighth is now Professor J. A. Paterson of the U.P. Divinity Hall, Edinburgh, who was the Gold Medallist of the School that year, that the ninth is now the distinguished Professor of Humanity in Aberdeen University, and the eleventh the no less distinguished Professor of Mathematics in the University of Edinburgh, and also an old Grammarian.

Macgregor was noted in his school days as a " grinder."

He would on occasion be at work till after midnight, and bet

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awakened by his landlady's son for its resumption before six o'clock in the morning. He attended the classes at Old Aberdeen for only one year, and then proceeded to Glasgow for the study of Medicine. Still he continued to grind. It is told that he practically committed to memory the entire text-book of anatomy, the result being that he took the first position in every subject except Natural History, in which he was second. He acted as assistant to the Professor of Surgery, Dr. (afterwards Sir) George Macleod, and to Professor M'Call Anderson. Returning to Aberdeen in 1872 as assistant to Dr. Robert Jamieson, Superintendent of the Royal Lunatic Asylum, he finished his medical course at Aberdeen, graduating in medicine and surgery at the close of the summer session. He had already held the diplomas of Licentiate of the Royal College of Physicians and Licentiate of the Faculty of Physicians and Surgeons, Glasgow.

Going out to Fiji under the auspices of Sir. Arthur Gordon (now Lord Stanmore), then Governor and Her Majesty's Consul-General in the Western Pacific, Dr., Macgregor gathered new and varied experience, and when New Guinea was taken over, his administrative talents and , unsurpassed knowledge of the Polynesian and Australasian. peoples designated him as the fittest officer in the Queen's service to be entrusted with the task of organising civilised rule among the Papuans.

The record of his labours as Administrator of British New: Guinea is contained in numerous official reports and iii communications to learned Societies. By his complete survey of the territory, all parts of which he has personally: visited, and by gaining for the British people the goodwill of the natives, he has rendered this new dependency available as a field for the British capitalist. As he stated in his Aberdeen address, the climate and conditions are very similar to those of Ceylon, and all kinds of tropical produce may be grown by native labour under European superintendence. The Grammar School has in recent years given two governors to Tasmania, and in the present Administrator of New Guinea it has sent forth one who has organised a

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new and vast territory, which is destined in the future to form a not unimportant part of the Colonial Empire of the Queen.

The degree of LL.D. was conferred the other day upon Sir William Macgregor by the University of Aberdeen, and a few weeks ago Cambridge gave him the honorary degree of Doctor in Science, on which occasion the Public Orator, Dr. Sandys, Fellow and Tutor of St. John's College, delivered the following speech :— "Orbis terrarum inter insulas, praeter Australiam latissime patet insula Australiae parti septentrionali ex adverso posita. 'rota quidem insula insulis Britannicis duplo major: insulaa autem pars a Britannis occupata Anglia ipsa major dimidio.

Nostrae vero coloniae ibi administrandae praepositus est vir insignis, ohm in Academia Aberdonensi medicinae doctor, nuper scientiarum complurium non modo fautor et adiutor, sed etiam ipso auctor atque investigator indefessus. Praesidis nostri auxilio, Anthropologiae, Ge.graphiae, Geologiae, aliis denique scientiis nova lux affolsit, adeo ut coloniam illam remotissimam non tam imperii nostrii prupognaculurn quam scientiarum arcetn et. castellum longinqumn appellaverim. De Caledoniae filiis quibus ubique terrarum plurinium debet Britannia, nonnumquam dicitur, cum peregre absint, tum deinum sese, sentire esse domi.

Huic Caledoniae filio paullisper reduci gratias hodie idcirco agimus, quod, a patria vocatus, non modo imperii nostri in utilitatem, sed etiam scientiae ad fructum, pal riam relinquere est dignatus. Gens autem illa antiqua, ex qua ortus esse confitetur, olim scdibus paternis expulsa et ipso nomine prorsus private, hodie, talium Tirorum auxilio, non sine nomine, non sine gloria est. Etenim pens illa gentem furtissimam a poeta Romano quondam laudatam aemulata, " ' duris ut ilex tonsa bipennibus, nigrae feraci frondis in Algido, per damna per caedes, ab ipso ducit opes animumque ferro.'

"Duco ad vos equitem insignem, WILLELMUM MACGREGOR."

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ABJECTS, ORTS AND IMITATIONS. THE maker of proverbs, with kindly spirit, has told us errare est humanum. Wisely the poet sang: " The child is father to the man." And one of the minor scribes, laying precept upon precept, makes bold to say that boys will be blunderers ; for what the old Scots king said was true, that " bairns war not born auld men."

To gather the following waifs and strays has been a long task, but by no means tedious ; and if the authors do not resent the plagiarism, all will be well. The soundness of the information is not guaranteed : " currency, not validity," is what the present penman gives to these wise saws and modern instances, a few of which may be witty, though many are rather musty.

Shakespeare speaks of the cat in the adage, and when Major Bartlott was at school, he was whipped for declaring an adage to be a place for keeping cats. Last Christmas Punch had this as a brand new joke : of course, we know that history, like Punch, repeats itself. A girl once gave me the same explanation of adage, with the alternative that it might be a tool for cutting wood. Augerhole, said the same damsel, was a prophet's cell : another made it the den of a giant that eats people ; while a third explained auger as a beast like a mole.

That the moon is made of green cheese is a saying from the old wives' fables : it was left for a boy's sapience to discover that it might be mutton. This youth turned Pope's " moon, refulgent lamp of night," into lamb of night.

The sheep is a favourite to blunder over; it is, to mix metaphors, quite a stumbling stone. And rightly so ; birds of a feather herd together. One authority declares that in France sheep are fed on stilts—dry eating, but to those who know, the blunder is less than it looks. It does not sound false to give the feminine of ram as yew ; but the blunder is quite as wooden as the last. One shudders to think of the result, if the youth, still soundly right, had spelled it to the examiner as you.

Further studies in Natural History teach that coward 19

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comes from cow and hard, while gander is the feminine of drake. Ergo, the proverb connecting goose and gander by sauce, is all wrong. As for the cobbler, so for the scientist, ne ultra crepidam is good advice. Writing on the peerage, the scientist just quoted says earless and count are feminines of earl, while as to the family, he holds daughter to be the feminine of brother and of nephew.

That such was his sincere, though mixed, belief, I gather from a remark of his that to show gender in certain words you must change 's into s' ; and from his mysterious dictum that words in y form the plural by changing the x vowel sound. This digression into erratic equations is puzzling ; but x represents the unknown, or the amount of our friend's want of knowledge, and a mathematician found that here x =a.

But to return to our, or rather Shylock's, " muttons."

Says Shakespeare, " a tainted wether," and means a plaguestruck sheep, but a future sanitary officer holds it to mean turning sour, and compares, the milk is tainted. Another declares tainted to be stormy : i.e., tainted = bad, and bad weather is frequently stormy.

Sheep remind one of pigs, and Bacon's admirers must be informed that his greatest anticipation of modern things was not the discovery of the principle of refrigeration, but the writing of The New Atalanta.—Girls' papers please copy. " Doth not Brutus bootless kneel ?" asked the great Julius, but it is erroneous to suppose that this was an insult—for Brutus had his shoes on—and caused Julius to receive the most unkindest cut of all. On firmer ground stood the boy who said bootless meant barefooted in Scott's Last Minstrel: " Undo the visor's barred band !

O bootless aid ! haste, holy Friar, Of all his guilt let him be shriven." and thought he had proved his case by quoting the next lines : " In haste the holy Friar sped, His naked foot was dyed with red."

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The expounder of exorcist as publican was so far right, if we think of our own country only, and ignore the difference in spirits. But he evidently had in mind publican and extortioner; as had that other who said exorcist is the name of a man who forces money out of people, and is derived from exorceo. The Latin is on a par with the general knowledge. Not to be outdone, another etymologist tells us that character is from cataract, and gift from donare. Friend is said to come either from frater or— because we are to love our enemies--from fiend. Is there a suggestion of bribery in the derivation of provost from praedonare, or does it mean that a provost must always bead a subscription list? But the prize goes to the ingenious and ingenuous guesser who derived neglego from nec = not, and the root of the Scotch gleg = sharp, clever.

The ubiquitous Scot ! not content with annexing the North Pole, he must plant in Latin Scotch roots several centuries before Scotch existed.

The feminine, or singular (doctors differ), of vixen is vix: scarcely right, we are tempted to murmur. Dear reader, it is a poor pun, and even Dr. Samuel Johnson would hardly suspect such an innocent of leading the maker to pick pockets. This excursus into the rich fields of classic lore recalls the comparison of amplus, viz., ammultus, amplus, amplurimus. But enough of classics: for the mummy proverb applies to them—nil nisi bonum de mortuis.

Philologists and tailors both talk of doublets, or at least did talk. But they do not know that doublet means-1, a short sword ; 2, a close-fitting hood; 3, tight and short knickerbockers. The same professions will be interested to learn that kerchief is the same as curfew.

Our informants have something to add to negro lore.

Scott's niggard hold is black ; while the latest variant in the story of Bruce's encounter with the English knight is that the axe fell right on de bone.

Abridge is to put a bridge over, to shorten, because, by bridging a stream, we really shorten the distance between the banks.

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Speaking of Church censure, Scott said the dire anathema has rung, but he did not know anathema to be a piece cif music sung in churches. Iconoclastic is the prevailing tone: for cloister is explained as a mixture, and Julian the Apostate figures as the Apostle.

'Tis well that M— N—, LL.D., D.C.L., author of a posthumous poem, is dead : it would have grieved him to hear that posthumous means published after disease. To Milton the moon, " rising in clouded majesty, at length unveiled her peerless light." He intended to be complimentary, but did not know, poor man, that peerless means not able to see through.

Rayleigh and Ramsay may discover a new substance in the air, our astronomer has seen a new star—and its name is nectar.

Ghosts are naturally at a discount nowadays, and we learn without surprise that a phantasma is merely a figure of speech.

"Where purls the brook," wrote Thomson in The Seasons: his paraphraser turns it to the brooks purred.

An urchin is a dog, says another zoologist ; and poor horsemen will sorrowfully admit the half truth that a Spanish jennet is a thing for punishing people. A real means of torture—a scourge—is appropriately derived from ex and courage. " Lochinvar staid not for brake, he stopped not for stone " : so sang Lady Heron. The latest idea of brake is that it means a machine, a vehicle : Lochinvar did not wait for the 'bus.

Virgil's (or should it be Vergil's ?) croaking crow stalked in solitary state across the sapless strand ; so the peaking and puling pessimist of the present pipes his piteous plaint, and, like a miniature (very miniature) Alexander the Great, weeps, yea blubbers, because there is not another world of knowledge to he conquered. Let him weep : the foregoing examples show that there are laurels yet to be won in the unexplored fields of romantic knowledge. One field is the New History—why not, when we have the New Humour ? A budding New Historian has come, and

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come to stay, and provides a sample to close this farrago.

Dealing with the tragic fate of the Stewart Dynasty, he very impressively sums up : " All the Jameses were either killed, hanged, or beheaded, but none died except James VI."

AN OLD BOY'S FIRST YEAR AT COLLEGE. A SHORT account by an Old Boy (of six months' standing) of what he saw and experienced during his first session at King's College may, perhaps, be of some interest to those Grammar School boys who hope to be Bajans at no very distant date. The young student's first care, after such trivial difficulties as the Preliminary and Bursary Examinations have been overcome, is to buy his gown and trencher, the outward emblems of his new dignity, and to exhibit them to the critical and admiring gaze of his friends. It is with considerable trepidation that he sallies forth for the first time clothed in scarlet toga and " mortar board." He wonders if everybody is looking at him, and he gets quite a shock when he hears the Spital youngsters' rhyme Butterie Willie Collie." This feeling, however, soon wears off, and gives place to a sense of elevation and self-importance, which is increased when the quondam schoolboy strides up Skene Street past the Grammar School, decked out in all his glory—a fearful and wonderful sight to a crowd of gaping youngsters. Your equanimity is apt to be rudely disturbed if a volley of snowballs comes whizzing about your ears. Of course, it is altogether beneath the dignity of a student to reply to such a challenge as this: not to be thought of. So the battered one has to walk on muttering imprecations (that cannot be printed) and vowing vengeance at some future date. It is not pleasant or comfortable to " get one" on the back of the neck and to feel the snow slowly trickle down your back.

Gown-tearing and trencher-dribbling are favourite pastimes at College, and it is highly interesting to watch an unfortunate and excited Bajan in the hands of a group of

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Tertians, and to see his gown (price 13/6) ripped up the back and torn into shreds to adorn the button-holes of the victors (1), or to watch him tearing round the quadrangle attempting in vain to collar his trencher, kicked into an unrecognisable ball of cardboard and black cloth.

The average Bajan is fairly indifferent to this sort of treatinent, but sometimes resistance is offered, and then no mercy or pity is shown. Not a vestige of red is left visible about the victim, except, perhaps, on his face. " Passing up " is another prevalent and popular form of amusement—it was not unknown at the Grammar some time ago. The present Grammar boy won't know what it means till he goes to King's, and, besides, the new seats are an obstacle to a successful " pass up." The cry of " Pass him up," when once raised, extinguishes the strains of " Old Hundredth " or " Gaudeamus," and in a moment the nearest students rush fiercely on the quaking victim. All that is seen is a seething mass of legs and arms, in the midst of which a dishevelled figure is tossed and banged about. It is only the entrance of the professor that stops the row, and sometimes not even that. Perhaps a student will try to escape this ordeal by not coming into the classroom till the very last moment, when the professor has taken his seat. A certain student, not unknown at the Grammar, who was often " passed up," used to practise this ruse with success, until the professor one day said to him—" I wish, Mr. S--, you would not delay coming in till the very last moment. It is very annoying, and hinders the work of the class." A knowing smile was on many faces. Next day, and every day afterwards, S-- was assisted up to the back seat by a shorter way than the passage.

About Christmas, Bajan and Semi fights were frequent, in which the Bajans did not always come off second best.

But Authority in full robes set down its foot and stamped them out. It hoped there would be no more of that silly fighting, or else some of the students would get into serious trouble. Authority also objects to amateur carving on the desks, plays the part of Sherlock Holmes to find out the culprits, and then offers to send in the carpenter's

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account or gives the option of a fine. The curb upon students is much tighter than it used to be. " Any student guilty of disorderly conduct at the Graduation ceremony will be arraigned before the Senatus." " Walking-sticks to be left outside." Voices, however, cannot be left outside, and at the Capping no student was more loudly cheered than the only double Honours man, an Old Boy of the Grammar School—A. M. Mackay.

The methods of working at College are, of course, quite different from those that prevail at school. Attending two or three classes daily, and taking copious notes, supplemented by a long " grind " at night, is preferable to sitting in school for five or six hours, and then going home to learn a page of Thucydides, a page of Livy, the 47th Prop., and the geography of the Fiji Islands. School " lessons " cannot hold a candle to College " studies," if the latter are honestly done. But there are a class of youths like James. " James is my brother. He has been twice ploughed, Yet he intends to have another try, Hoping to pass (as he says) in a crowd.

Sanguine is James, but not so sanguine I. If you demand my reason, I reply : Because he reads no Greek without a key, And spells Thucydides c-i-d-y ; Yet James is going in for his degree."

An attraction of College life is that the period of work only extends to five months, or, with the summer session, to a little over seven. Thus five months in the year are nominally holidays. Summer readings and other devices create a lot of work, and no student who is not absolutely indifferent would allow all this time to slip away without doing something.

Lady students are now an established institution, and have proved themselves to be no incapable scholars. They are well up in the class lists—having one first ; and some of them have passed Degree examinations. Grammarians had better look out at the Bursary competition and not let themselves be " beaten by girls."

A majority of those who do not intend to take honours

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in Classics should enter the senior classes in Latin and Greek. They thus save a winter session. They may not be able to pass the Degree examination in March, but by diligent work they ought to be able to do so by the following October.

Much could be written about the relaxations of students, the societies, " shines," students' concert, students' nights at the Theatre, class suppers, &c., but this paper must now draw to a close with the hope that Grammar School boys will be as successful at College in the future as they have always been in the past.

MORE LEAVES FROM THE JOURNAL OF FOUR INNOCENTS ABROAD. THE Innocents had to keep their eyes wide open when

getting change. The gentle reader, of course, knows, like Macaulay's omniscient schoolboy, that, in return for a five franc piece, he may receive a Belgian franc, an Italian lira, a Greek drachma, or a Spanish peseta, in addition to the ordinary French franc, but let him beware of the dates on his coins. Let him beware of the Italian lira with the benevolent-looking face of Pope Pius IX., for it is quite worthless, having no value even in Italy. Let him also take care of the Spanish peseta of the Phillipine Islands.

In fact, to be quite safe, refuse everything except French coinage.

When the Innocents set off to purchase things on their own account, they generally came back with a few bad coins, but the Bear-Leader went back with them, and threatened that the British Consul would be informed, nay, that even a diplomatic rupture might occur 1 It was with but a sickly smile that the oily shopkeeper, or supple waiter, pocketed the smiling Pio Nono, or the 1854 peseta. It was Merton who was done for most frequently in this way.

But the B.-L. remembers when the Stripling, Sandford, and Merton, fresh from a gorge on raspberry ices, came

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panting back to the hotel in Cherbourg, as they had got a most cosmopolitan assortment of change, and every silver piece in it was bad.

The much-enduring B.-L. meekly consented to be dragged down to the cafe where they had been swindled, and summoned the short jacketed and white-aproned waiter. He, with many shrugs and heavenward glances. protested his innocence for a long time, but finally, with a very bad grace, exchanged the bad coins for good ones.

It was in Cherbourg where the Innocents experienced French politeness in a rather unpleasant way.

On entering the fashionable cafe after breakfast they found their passage to empty seats barred by a fat, undersized officer, with great goggle, octopus eyes, glaring fiercely at the intruders.

It was, perhaps, the easy, athletic stride of the Stripling that vexed him, or perhaps the timid Merton displeased him, but he did not budge ; and on the Stripling moving a chair on which were the podgy one's gloves, a volley of words was let loose, such as I hope no one who reads this paper may ever hear.

Fortunately for the Innocents it was in French. The B.-L. kept a discreet silence, and conversed with his three young persons about the weather and such-like mild topiCs. The little Frenchman had his fat little figure on one chair, his legs on another, his gloves on another, his kepi and cane on another. At last another officer entered—the little one burst forth to him with an account of the insolence of four foreigners presuming to enter the particular cafe which he honoured with his presence. The Innocents sipped their coffee, stolidly, Sphinx like. Finally the two began a game of dominos, where the little man lost both his temper and the game. He snatched up his cane, kepi, and gloves, roaring like a bull, and, fixing the mild Merton with his Gorgon eyes, he shouted at the pitch of his voice, " Wat be you want" two or three times, and banged out of the place, to the great awe of the subalterns who were sitting round, and to the amusement of the Innocents.

The Stripling, wishing to air his French, exclaimed—

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" Bien ! je jamais," which, being interpreted, means " Well !

I never."

It turned out that this rude fellow was one of the great men of the town, having the whole population, civil and military, under his thumb.

The Innocents hastened away as quickly as possible from such an inhospitable town, and well it was that they did so, for it appears that if they had stayed there over 48 hours they would have had to produce their passports, and as it was, they had to write down in the hotel books a full account of themselves, their age, profession, country, &c., &c.

They were now en route for Paris, but broke the journey at Rennes, where they arrived about 1 a.m. They had been recommended to a certain hotel, but mistook the name of it, and after wandering about an hour they got a guide who took them to the wrong place. After waiting a few minutes outside a dilapidated gateway they heard the clumping sabots of the sleepy porter who slowly undid the bars and bolts of the crazy old door which creaked wearily on its hinges. After paying their guide they were conducted up some dirty winding stairs till they reached a long dingy dormitory filled with little narrow beds side by side, reminding one of a convicts' ward. Sandford, whose imagination is steeped with literature of the Deadwood Dick type, whispered something about secret panels and midnight assassins, or something equally enticing, when suddenly a lean, grey rat scampered across the room which was lit by the one flickering candle of the porter.

On this the Innocents turned tail and rushed down stairs into the street, never even bidding the porter goodnight, and he, poor man, was shouting from the top of the stairs that he had " other chambers more elegant, if Messieurs les voyageurs would have the bounty to wait."

But once on the street, what were they to do? Que faire ? Almost everyone was in bed.

At last the shouts of two belated revellers came nearer and nearer, and round the corner of the street swaggered two non-commissioned French officers, one a Zouave and the other evidently a dragoon. The B.-L., leaving the three woe-

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begone Innocents, approached and asked the Zou-Zou if he could show them a good hotel. He at once assented with great good humour, declaring that it must be that Messieurs les Anglais had suffered a great inconvenience. " Mais, non," answered the Innocents, " we are not English, we are Scots —the ancient friends of France." The old formula worked marvels. The Zou-Zou became frantic with joy, and insisted on embracing the Innocents, as he had been educated in Edinburgh for some years, and could speak a little English still.

He and his friend conducted them to the best hotel in Rennes, and saw them comfortably installed. There was nothing much to be seen there, except a review of some diminutive dragoons on the local Champs de Mars. How different these wizened, prematurely old youngsters appeared in comparison with the Scots Greys or the Household Cavalry ! The Stripling put them all to shame.

By the evening of that day the Innocents had arrived in Paris, at the station Mount Parnasse, and "descended" at the Hotel Continental, right opposite the Gardens of the Tuileries. Here they found themselves quite at home, with no necessity for speaking anything but English. Sandford thanked goodness, and the Stripling packed away his manual of French conversation, and Merton," le petit," put on his glossiest collar and his starchiest shirt to do honour to the occasion. It was like a return to civilization once more, and Sandford, who was the gourmand of the party, was looking forward to what he called " a good square feed."

The Innocents were just at that stage when they begin to be critical over the tabs of their collars, and the correct fall of their trousers at the knee, and whether their watchchain should stretch right across from pocket to pocket, or droop gracefully down. Never forgetting, of course, to turn up their trousers at the feet. Every morning one or other of them would anxiously examine his upper lip, looking at it in every light, and like Fatima in Blue Beard, was it not? calling " Sister Anne, Sister Anne, do you see any down appearing yet."

What was the first thing the Innocents insisted on see-

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ing ? Notre Dame ? The Louvre ? The Champs Elysees (which Sandford, by the by, pronounced Champs Eliza) ?

By no means, impatient reader. They insisted on seeing the Morgue the very first thing in the morning—before breakfast too—either the Morgue or nothing. Macaulay's schoolboy would glibly inform you that all the dead bodies dragged from the Seine are here deposited on inclined marble slabs to be recognised by their friends. What a ghastly sight it was ! There were three dead bodies when the Innocents looked through the plate glass windows into the room where the bodies lay artificially frozen, stiff, and horrible, just as they were fished out of the river. They will never forget the awful look on one man's face, a look of unspeakable horror and agony combined. And, worse than all this, were the heartless and filthy remarks of the Parisian loafers, as they leered through the windows at the unfortunates within.

The B.-L. was glad to get out again, but the three Innocents wished they had taken their camera with them.

Nothing would satisfy them that day, for their thoughts were always in the Morgue. In vain did they examine the wonderful relics and jewels in Notre Dame; in vain did they hear mass in the Madeleine, it was always that horrible frozen chamber.

On their way home they had breakfast in one of the fashionable cafes—fish, chops, cheese, fruits, and a bottle of white wine. What was their surprise to find that their bill amounted to 52 francs, or a little over £2 ! Cheese was charged at 1 franc each, peaches 11 francs a piece, melon 1 franc per slice, &c., &c. The Innocents thought of their fellow-countryman in distress, who had hardly been five minutes in London before " Bang went saxpence."

The B.-L. paid over the amount with great dignity, and, heading the procession of Innocents, stalked through the double row of bowing waiters, even Merton, "le petit," looking reproachfully through his pince-nez on the smallest garcon, who was beaming all over,and expecting his pourboire like the rest. Needless to say they got none. The Innocents continued in single file till the corner of the next street, and

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then the Stripling exclaimed, in his finest Parisian, " Bon Seigneur "! Good gracious. All the others chimc.... in with something similar, and they unanimously voted that they would not patronise that cafci again. To console themselves they climbed the Eiffel Tower, and ate and drank all sorts of indigestible things, and came down laden with all kinds of useless mementoes, which they could have bought at half the price in the Palais Royal—the New Market of Paris. .

C. D. (To be concluded.)

" PLESS TA NEW ORDINANCES ! " " PLEBS to New Ordinances ! " was the fervent exclamation of

Shon M‘Sporran, when he heard the news. Shon was not a laughing animal then. He was a quiet lad, a sober lad from the " North Countrie." He had come to the Grammar to learn " ta, Latin ; " yes, intred !

Ile thought the Grammar boys very frivolous whatefer ; for they interfered with Shon, and gave him the proud, proud name of " Ta Chief ". Sometimes when the maxies in Shon's version were as numerous as the " seas on the sand shore" they would cheer. Sometimes they would comfort Shon, saying —" Never mind, Chief : ' They're far ahint that daurna follow'". Sometimes they would hum in an innocent, unconscious way— "Ta Chief in silenee strode behind With many maxies on his mind.

Ta Chief has swore by book and kirk To stap them with his Highland dirk."

Shon was a quiet boy. What, then, could have brought such an exclamation from Shon ? Let me say. One morning, as the Grammarians wended their way to school, they read on the news-bills this arrestive legend—" A New Draft Ordinance." That was of deep interest. The Grammarians do not suffer the grass to grow under their shoe-soles. A rush was made for the newspaper. At the interval one of Shon's class got up on a desk and read the new ordinance

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for the general edification. The ordinance was surely no ordinary one ; for the tension of the class was prodigious.

There was "silence deep as death "—a phenomenon sufficiently remarkable among Grammarians.

He began— New Draft Ordinance.

The University Commissioners have issued a supplementary ordinance that cannot fail to have far-reaching consequences. It is as follows : -• " With the view of promoting the higher interests of the Scottish Universities, and of popularising the same, we herein appoint that from this date, at the graduation ceremony, the professors shall no more occupy their 'sellae curules' in chapels or other places appointed for the aforesaid ceremony.

Further, they shall no longer be required to shake hands with the out-going students. We further ordain that the aforesaid 'sellae' be in future occupied by the lady students of the Arts Faculty, and that the graduands shall be privileged in turn to salute (on the right or left cheek, or on the lips, as the University Court shall from time to time determine) the new occupants of the aforesaid 'sellae curules.' Students having conscientious objections shall be exempted on taking an affirmation."

Pless to new Ordinances !" quoth the transported Shon M'Sporran. Shon had hit the nail on the head—that is, he had voiced exactly what all had thought, but had not so expressed. The effect was magical. " Three cheers for Shon," was the cry. " Ta Chief " was a hero from that day. He developed wonderfully, and became great at the Grammar.

Shon went up to college. There his fame increased.

His wisdom was known in the land. The authorities found much tribulation with the ordinance that had been the making of Shon. The graduation ceremony grew longer every year. The Court had ruled that graduands should salute the fair " curules " on the right cheek, or on the left, or on the lips as might meet their preference. But this opened a door for abuse.

'Tis a common proof that give an inch and lose an ell.

The graduands interpreted the Court-ruling in a peculiar way. To a man their preference was to follow all three modes of salute—first on one cheek then on the other, and

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finally on the lips. The Senatus was embarrassed ; but they knew not quite what to do. Then the graduands took the ell. They began to put their arms across the "sellae," so that the salute was like to be turned into an embrace.

Things were becoming chaotic. Dank ester, too, lodged a complaint that he could not get the students to wait till he had adjusted the hood.

At this point, the sagacity of Shon solved all difficulties.

His great motion was—" That in future it is expedient that the salute be administered by the class representatives of the S.R.C." The motion was at length carried. Its effect was extraordinary in one aspect. The S.R.C. leapt at one bound to fame and respect. He was accounted indeed happy who gained a seat there.

The " Fathers" were delighted at their happy deliverance from a ticklish quandary—and, more astonishing,, grateful. With enthusiasm and unanimity they decided. forthwith to confer, honoris causa, on Mr. Shon M`Sporran, the degree of LLD.—being the first student that has received that high honour from his Alma Mater.

LN FIASCO.

AN OLD CRICKET MATCH.

BY AN OLD BOY.

IN looking carelessly over an old newspaper file the other day—you are always coming on interesting " finds " in an old file—I caught sight of a little paragraph in an obscure corner of the paper that seemed strangely familiar. It was the account of a cricket match—" Grammar School Masters v. Pupils "—played on Thursday, June 21st, 1883. The description of the match was bald and brief, but it awoke such memories of the old school twelve years ago, as nothing else could have done. The sunny June day, the crowd of noisy youngsters—of which I was one—squatting on the grass to see the masters become, for the time being, ordinary cricket playing mortals, and the exciting finish— why, it could never be twelve years ago. But a newspaper,

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whatever faults it may have, makes no mistake as to the date of its issue ; and the one before me was unmistakably headed "June 22, 1883." And yet it seemed but yesterday since we watched the Masters' team taking the field, for the School had won the toss, and were to bat. Dr. Moir— then Mr. Moir—with coat off, and shirt sleeves rolled up, determined to bowl all he knew, and infecting everyone with his enthusiasm ; Mr. Lothian, cool and collected, the great hope of his side ; Mr. Harvey, whose classical scholarship did not prevent him making one of the best catches in the match ; Mr. Pope, who, with a little luck, would have won the match for his colleagues; and Mr. Hanna, the handsome gymnastic instructor. And in the School team " Bob " Innes, straightest of bowlers, and steadiest of bats ; tall John Roy, who had an awkward knack of bowling " shooters," and his brother Tom ; Salmond, always a safe bat ; Frank Kelly, something of a hitter; and the two Foggos.

Twelve years bring many changes, and it would now be impossible to gather together the opposing teams. All the members of the School team left the Grammar a year or two after the match, and of the Masters' eleven three only —Dr. Moir, Mr. Lawrence, and Mr. Pope—are still in the School. Mr. Lothian, or " A. V.", as he was generally called — the best all-round athlete ever at the school—is now in Glasgow. He was for several years the mainstay of the cricket and football clubs, and a Grammar School match without Mr. Lothian in the old days was like the play without Hamlet. A capital bowler and batsman, his presence always inspired the team with confidence. Any " old boy " who was present at the second 'Shire match in 1887, is not likely to forget it. The two first Grammar wickets had gime down with the first two balls of the match, and the School eleven shook in their shoes. But " A. V." stopped the " rot" in characteristic fashion, sending the first two balls he received out of the ground for a couple of glorious sixes. The enthusiastic roar that followed the flight of the second ball over the wall was enough to have shaken the UM. 'Shire pavilion to its foundations. Mr. Lothian has

Aw Old Cricket Match.

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gone, but in Mr. Menzies the school has found an able successor. Of the other " old masters," Mr. Green is still in Aberdeen, as Head Master of Skene Square School ; Mr. H. F. Campbell is now one of the rising members of the local bar ; Mr. George Harvey resides at Grantown ; while Mr. Hanna is now across the seas in New Zealand. Mr. Sleigh's death last year was deeply regretted by all "F.P's" and present boys alike. Of the School team, three—Salmond, Kelly, and John Roy—are still in Aberdeen. From the account of the match given below, it will be noticed that Mr. Lothian and Mr. Innes had a curiously equal record.

Each was the highest scorer for his side, and each took seven wickets.

The School batted first, Innes and Moir facing Dr. Moir and Mr. Lothian. Dr. Moir bowling fast underhand, kept down the runs—it was impossible to take liberties with his bowling—while Mr. Lothian took the wickets. This he did with a vengeance, clean bowling the first five batsmen, and for a time it looked as if the School score would be under 20. " Bob " Innes stuck to his guns, however, and met the bowling with confidence, and with a little assistance from Kelly, and still more from Mr. "Extra," the School managed to amass 30, and were glad to get it. The innings came to an abrupt conclusion, for Dr. Moir dismissed the last three batsmen in summary fashion, Innes carrying out his bat for an invaluable dozen. How well Dr. Moir and Mr. Lothian bowled may be gathered from the fact that nine of the School team managed to contribute only seven runs between them. The fielding of the Masters was wonderfully accurate. Thirty was not a great total, and so well did Mr. Lawrence and Mr. Lothian commence their task to get them, that at first it looked all over with the School. The fall of the first wicket, however, was the first of a series of disasters. Mr. Lothian attempted to stop the " rot," but Innes was bowling his best, and when the ninth wicket went down, the Masters' score was only 25. With one wicket to fall, and only six runs to get to win, the match was anyone's, and even the noisiest youngster on the field felt that the occasion demanded—if only for a few 20

234

The Grammar School Magazine.

seconds—the repression of all lung power. When Mr. Pope, the Masters' last hope, appeared at the wickets, and " took centre," " There was silence deep as death, And the boldest held his breath, For a time."

Mr. Pope was equal to the occasion, and promptly dispatched the first ball he received for three ; and the School supporters gave themselves up for lost. It was a last effort, for a straight one from Innes found its way to Mr. Sleigh's wicket, and the match was over. The School had won by the narrow margin of two runs ; but—as we boys afterwards remarked—" If Mr. Pope had only been sent in earlier:" The following were the full scores :— PUPILS. R. W. Innes, not out . . . .

J. Moir, b Lothian . .

T. Roy, b Lothian . .

J. Roy, b Lothian C. Maitland, b Lothian .

R. Foggo, b Lothian . . .

A. Mackie, c Harvey b Lothian . .

J. Salmond, h Lothian . . .

F. Belly, b Moir . . .

E. Foggo, b Moir . .

J. Roberts, b Moir .

Extras .

Total

.

.

.

.

.

. .

.

. . .

12 0 0 1 3 0 1 0 5 0 2 6

•

.

.

30

.

. .

. . . . . . . . . .

5 9 0 0 2 4) 1 4 0 3 4

.

28

. . . . .

. . . .

. . . .

-

MASTERS. Mr. Lawrence, c Rny b Innes .

Mr. Lothian, b Innes .

Mr. Moir, b Junes .

Mr. Crow, c Foggo b Innes Mr. Green, c Moir b Innes Mr. Campbell, b J. Roy .

Mr. Wilson, run out . .

Mr. Hanna, b Innes . .

Mr. Sleigh, b Innes . .

Mr. Pope, not out Extras .

Total

.

.

. . .

. . . . . . .

. . . . . .

. . .

" Virgin Nomination."

235

" VIRGIN NOMINATION." PHILOLOGY is a wonderful science, says Dr. Fossil M'Fog.

He has lately published his little book, or rather his magnum, opus. To the " Philology of Virgin Nomination," indeed, he has given the sunniest of his days, and the starriest of his nights for the past two decades. " Fame is the spur," he hints, " that his clear spirit hath raised to scorn delights and live laborious days."

The result justifies the consumption of so many pounds of candles. A few examples will bear this out and render eulogy unnecessary. What could equal, not to say surpass, the penetration, research, and " ripe scholarship " of these : a corruption for CITHARINE, from the Greek kithara (a harp) ; applied originally to a lady who kept ever "harping" on the foibles and shortcomings of husband, son, or brother.

ISABELLA : a hybrid ; from Greek ise (equal) and Latin bella (fern. adj. meaning fair to look upon). A gentleman • named a lady BEAUTY. Another lady present was scandalised at his preference—in fact, offended. Her he hastened to call ISABELLA (equally fair to look upon) ; and as every lady is said to consider herself as fair as another, and fairer, too, the name has increased from day to day.

JEANNIE: came to us through the French.

JEAN in French means John. Therefore Jeannie is equal to Johnnie.

It seems that certain would-be fast young maids who affected walking sticks and loud neck-ties were so denominated in La Belle France.

MARY : from march (bitterness) ; applied first to ancient maidens by reason of their being charged in a high degree with this acid quality.

JANE : compare JEANNIE above. [Here we would venture to differ from the learned Dr. M'Fog. JANE has absolutely no connection with Jeannie. The true etymology is palpably JANUS (god of door opening), the feminine of which is JANA. This may imply that the first JANE possessed the highly reprehensible and inexpedient accomplishment of sitting up for male members of the family circle.]

CATHARINE :

236

The Grammar School Magazine.

KATE : no connection with CATHARINE, as some otherwise eminent authorities would have us believe. They seem to have been led unwittingly into error by those ladies who spell CATHARINE with a K. Two derivations may be offered ; (1) from cate (to purvey), compare caterpillar ; (2) from cate, equal to cat. Seems to have arisen • from exasperation at over-watchfulness. A more polite age could not endure such a libellous designation. On the analogy of those who write Smythe for Smith, &c., C was changed to K with a final E.

These examples will speak their own praises to ears open to the eternal fitness of things. But the enemies of philology are a scurrilous crew. Some have even suffered a twisted nature to be profane at the mere mention of philology. At the sight of a real live philologer there is decidedly "hay on their horn." With gross irreverence they have insinuated that there never was, is not, and never can be a more wooden entity, or nonentity, than the pure philologer, that such are as mummified as the Sacred Cats of Memphis, and that their productions are thus in common with the aforesaid cats—an admirable substitute for animal manure.

Readers of the G. S. Magazine will agree, I think, that abuse is not criticism any more than vulgar tub-thumping is weighty argument.

R. SMELFUNGUS.

MYSTIFICATION. " THE oilskin must have been taken off the cow," observed

the wayfarer, as he sipped his glass of christened milk. " Oilskin ? " quoth Boniface, " Oilskin ?"

"Yes," quoth the wayfarer, "the oilskin must have slipped off. There was rain last night. It must have soaked through the cow into the milk."

C. Collapse of Boniface.

Reports, &e.

4:37

REPORTS, Stc.

DEBATING SOCIETY. THE twelfth session of this Society has come to a close. In some

respects it has been a success, in some it has not. All the faults, however, can be accounted for.

The second half of the session was opened on January 11th by a lecture by the Rector on " The Campaigns of Montrose," delivered in the Hall, and illustrated by limelight. A short account will be found elsewhere.

January 18th was the " hat" night. This was not a great success. Since it was new to the Society, many of the members did not fully comprehend what was expected, and by far the greater part of the subjects drawn were hackneyed subjects for debate. The most interesting part of this meeting was the animated discussion at the end as to what form the Finale should take.

On February 1st John M`Bain read an excellent paper on " Astronomy," which was highly appreciated.

On February 8th the busin3ss was a debate on the question " Is the character of Oliver Cromwell deserving of admiration 7" The affirmative was supported by James G. Slessor, the negative

by W. N. Leslie. The vote resulted in a majority of 14 to 8 for Leslie.

On February 15th Herr Hein read a paper on his " Humorous and Pathetic Experiences" in this country. The meeting was affected by the pathetic pieces very nearly to — bursting.

After finishing his paper, Herr Hein read a short humorous selection entitled, " The Frenchman's Dilemma," which was also very pathetic.

On February 22nd G. A. Combe read a short biography of General Gordon, and Henry F. Lyall Grant gave a comparison of Scott and Thackeray as novelists.

On March 1st no meeting was held, in consequence of the production of " Paul Pry " by the F.P. Dramatic Society.

On March 8th Mr. Mackie read a paper on Moliere, describing his life, his personal appearance, his works and literary style, and at the close translated selections from some of his best comedies.

238

The Gru nom r School Magazioe.

On March 15th the last ordinary meeting was held. The business was a debate—" Were the Northern or the Southern States in the right in the American Civil War I" Former—Jas. M'Queen; latter—Wm. Minto. As there was a poor attendance, the discussion was not lively, the only notable events being Wm. Fraser's speech of 10 minutes in length, and M'Queen's vehement eloquence in summing up.

The Finale was held on March 22nd. It took the shape of a concert, followed by a short act—The Trial Scene from " Pickwick." The silver collection amounted to £5 9s. 9d , consisting of 16 shillings, 71 sixpences, 221 threepenny pieces, 33 pennies, 6 halfpennies, 2 co-operative checks, about half a dozen trouser buttons, 1 greatcoat button, 1 tin medal, and several other circular discs.

Financially the session has been a success, as there will he about £3 of a surplus.

The membership was 50, but the attendance has not been proportionally great. Before Christmas the average attendance was 31 : at Dr. Moir's lecture and at the impromptu debate the following week there were 39 present. After Christmas, however, the attendance decreased, and the average was about 22.

At Herr Hein's lecture on February 15th there were 17 present.

The average attendance for the session has been about 25 (i.e., about half the membership). These poor attendances are due to the lack of enthusiasm in the VI. Class, and especially in the committee of the Society. The V. and IV. Classes have been well represented each night, but there were hardly ever more than 4 of the VI. present after Christmas. Three of the committee were present 3 times each out of 12, and one was present 4 times ; at Herr Hein's lecture* only one member of committee was present. When this is the attitude of the committee, what can we expect of the other members I The behaviour also has been very bad. Since the VI. attended so badly, the meetings were chiefly composed of junior members.

The new desks also afford greater facility for " racket."

Let us hope that the class who will have the management next year will attend better than their predecessors have done, and behave better than they did this year. . The poor attendance at this meeting was due to a students' " function " held the same evening.

Reports,

239

FOOTBALL. F.P.'s v. WATSON'S COLLEGE, EDINBURGH, Saturday, February 23.—This important match was played at Mannofield before a fair number of spectators. The ground was in a very soft condition, so that it was almost possible after the match to count the number of mauls. The College kicked off at 2.5O, and pressed after the ball had been returned to mid-field. Play in the first half .was, as a rule, rather slow. After Rae had brought the ball by a dribble to the centre of the field, the Grammar pressed, and touch was given at Watson's 25 line. A free kick to Watson's was returned by Butchart to past the College 25.

After this play was of an even character, first Watson's and then Grammar pressing. Walker ran down a kick near the visitors' 25, but Graham saved well by a beautiful return. At 3.18 the ball was again at the College 25, and a kick by Sleigh just at half-time was returned by the full back. In the second period the halves had a larger share of the play, and the game was much more interesting. Brown kicked off at 3.25, and almost immediately the College began to press, but Milne saved well at the School 25, and half•past three saw the ball at mid-field. A free kick to Watson's at the School 25 a little later proved unsuccessful, but for some time the College had the best of the game.

Gauld was well held and prevented from kicking. In a little, although Marr had a free kick for the School, some good passing on the part of the College, started by Gover, had the result of forcing the School back to their goal line. Here a very stiffly contested maul took place, in which the Grammar gained some ground, and shortly afterwards Sleigh and Milne broke away, and a splendid run brought the ball to the other end of the field.

In a minute or two the School pressed, but a too hard dribble brought the ball prematurely behind, and the. College touched down. Soon after the ball bad been set in motion again, time was sounded, and the match ended a draw—no scoring. The backs on both sides did as well as could be expected considering the state of the ground. Among the College forwards, M'Laren, Dallas, and Balsillie played well ; while, on the Grammar side, Rae and Webster were conspicuous among a hard-working set.

F.P.'s v. 'VARSITY.—Played at King's College on March 9.

The F.P.'s were never in better form, and kept the 'Varsity well in check during the whole game. In the first half the Grammar

240

.

The Grammar School Magazine.

got in behind, but no goal resulted. A few minutes later Gauld accepted a beautiful pass, and got away with a fine run, but for some reason, known only to the referee, was called back. The 'Varsity were hardly ever past the centre flag in this period. In the second half D. V. .Haig got a pass from his brother, let the ball fall forward, and then ran in behind. The kick failed.

Another try was scored soon after. Play was then carried up to the 'Varsity goal, and from a beautiful throw-in by Butchart, Ramsay touched down between the posts. The try was disallowed. With only ten minutes left play settled down at mid• field. The match looked a certain win for the 'Varsity, but the Grammar never gave in, and steadily worked the ball towards their opponents' goal. A minute before time Finlayson secured a try, which was allowed. The match thus ended in a draw, 2 tries each side. Among the F.P.'s Mr. Menzies at goal, Gauld, the two Butcharts, and Grant were most conspicuous ; in the 'Varsity, Milne, the Haigs, Mitchell, Haydon, and Cotman.

SCHOOL V. HALL RUSSELL'S ENGINEERS (return).—This match was played at the School Grounds on Jan. 19, but proved rather a failure, owing to the sides not being fully represented— about 12 on the Grammar side, 9 on that of the Engineers. The Engineers got behind twice, and the second try was improved into a goal.

CLASSICAL V. MODERN.—Played at School Grounds—the last match of the season. In the first half Stuart, and then Holmes, secured ties for the Modern, the latter of which was converted into a goal by A. Milne. For the Classical, Thomson made a brilliant run and lost the ball ; Robertson, however, was there, and dashed over the line and secured a try. Grant kicked the goal. In the second half J. Milne dropped a goal, and Frost and A. Milne got behind, while the Classical scored a second point just at the end .of the game. Score—Classical, 1 goal 1 try (8 points) ; Modern, 2 goals, 1 dropped goal, 2 tries (20 points).

The football season of 1894-95 may be regarded as fairly successful, even although the School have lost 6 matches out of the 9 played, the rest having been won. The School scored 88 points against their opponents' 110, which may be regarded as very satisfactory when the difference, both in strength and weight, of our opponents, against such a light team as ours, is taken into account. Our play has been characterised by perseverance, and

Reports, t(C.

241

has much improved since the beginning of the season ; and as we had improved much at Christmas, we should very likely have made a bold try for the remaining matches had we not been prevented by frost and snow.

The following have gained their places in the XV. :— A. Bisset, A. Mackenzie, G. Greig, J. Milne, K. Mackenzie, A. Milne, J. Stuart, A. Butchart, A. Fraser, G. Gray, J. Johnson, H. Grant, R. Garvie, J. Bower, and R. Holmes. Bisset was rather erratic and rash in his play at goal. Greig was the best of the halves, his tackling being very sure, and his frequent dashes were very useful. On the whole the quarters played well, but not nearly enough together. Stuart was far and away the best of the forwards, but they all played well ; their fault was in thinking that they could hold their own with their opponents in the mauls, and, instead of heeling out the ball at once, keeping it amongst their feet, their opponents forcing them back, and . thus losing us a lot of ground.

J. W. MILNE, Captain.

1ST XV. CHARACTERS.

J. W. MILNE (half).—Has captained the team with energy and judgment. A good centre, playing well to his wings; should kick more (especially in losing games); promises well for another year.

H. F. L. GRANT.—Uses his weight in the scrummage ; tackles strongly ; and is good out of touch.

J. A. STUART. —A good hard-working forward ; has pace, and follows up well ; not quite at home when the ball gets into his hands ; can dribble.

G. W. GREIG (half).— Uses his pace with effect, and plays determinedly ; collars well ; a poor kick in games.

ALAN MACKENZIE (half).—Has been invaluable in defence throughout ; takes a pass well, and kicks most judiciously.

A. M. BISSET.-A fairly safe back, but apt to leave his place ; kicks and collars well ; is following up his kicks better.

A. J. MILNE (quarter).—A useful player, with a good idea of the game, but rather slow for his position ; can pass, but not always quick enough ; a sure place kick.

K. W. MACKENZIE (quarter).—Plays much beyond his size; keeps close to the ball ; collars, passes, and throws out well ; should kick more.

21

242

The Grammar School Magazine.

IL GARVIE.— Has played some good games ; a fast forward, and a safe tackler ; can fill a vacancy at half.

J. A. BOWER.—An energetic forward when in motion ; tackles strongly ; is good in the loose ; a useful quarter at times, passing well.

A. B. BUTCHART. —Promising forward ; good out of touch and in the loose.

J. J. .JOHNSON.—An untiring forward ; too fond of picking up the ball with no idea of using it then or getting rid of it ; can collar.

A. FRASER —His pace is useful forward; he often tackles well, but not low enough for certainty ; can play half, but is slow in getting under weigh.

G. A. GRAY.—Rather light for a forward ; plays hard and collars well.

J. A. BUTCHART. —Has kept his last year's place in the F.P.'s team, and has not often been able to help the School. A most promising centre half ; passes well at close quarters ; punts effectively; sometimes shows a tendency to get too near the touch line. Was chosen for the City team r.

Gala, Jedforest, 'Varsity, 'Varsity (return), and Edinburgh Wanderers.

FURTHER LIST OF OBJECTS GIVEN TO THE MUSEUM. OBJECT.

DATE.

DONOR.

Feb. 25.

Mar. 14. ,, .•

- Wm. H. Melvin, - Geo. F. Rose (F.P. ), ,, „ ,, -

,, ,.

,, ,,

4•

7,

-

,, ,,

,, ,, ,, ,,

,, ,, , ,,

Snout of Sword-fish—Persian Gulf.

Model of a Jewish Tomb.

Malay Creese.

Chinese Sword.

Scottish Hunting-Knife—deerborn handle.

- Narwhal's Tooth, found near Drum.

- Ivory Model of a Hindu Cart and Ox-team.

Burmese Gong (engraved).

- Two Objects of Basket and Iron.— origin and use unknown.

- Also a Charm of bark and twine, containing sandy earth, accompanying above.

- Adder from Bridge of Potarch.

- Sea-Urchin.

- Sea-Horse.

- Saw-Fish Snout.

-

JOHN C. NFLEOID, HATTER, 46 UNION STREET, OULD respectfully intimate to pupils of Grammar School a

W Large Stock of Cap and (131engarrp Mabges, as authorised ;

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