SEPTEMBER 2019
the dos and don’ts of
WORKPLACE ROMANCE DEBT CRISIS what does the Bible say?
“GOD, PLEASE DON’T LET ME DIE!”
A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON THE WORLD TODAY
IN THIS ISSUE
SEPTEMBER 2019
THE DOS AND DON’TS OF WORKPLACE ROMANCE PAGE 32 When your eyes meet across a crowded (staff) room . . .
6 CURRENT
WHAT IN THE WORLD THE ILLUSION OF CONNECTION Are you addicted to your screen? 12 YOUR SAY Social media speaks out on loneliness 48 THE DEBT CRISIS Does the Bible predict a coming financial crisis?
60 60 HARA HACHI BU
The simple Japanese phrase for a longer and leaner life
4 6
WELLBEING
20 YOU CAN RECOVER
FROM THE DEVASTATION OF GRIEF 38 GO HEALTHY FOR GOOD Health news for every body
FAITH
14 “GOD, PLEASE DON’T
LET ME DIE!” In a single moment, his life changed forever 26 STUBBORN FAITH When faith transcends reason 36 UNFORCED The one thing God can’t do 40 THE RULE OF LAW Rules, consequences and forgiveness
FIND US ON SOCIAL MEDIA 2
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/SIGNSOFTHETIMES
CULTURE
54 THIS IS THE BOOK THAT
CHANGED MY DIET THE MOST Book review: The Healthiest People on Earth
SCIENCE & TECH
46 THE CUTTING EDGE
What’s happening in research, engineering and technology?
FUN
62 CROSSWORD & SUDOKU
Have you been paying attention?
FROM THE EDITOR “The good life.” That’s what we’re all keen for. A happy family, a healthy body and enough money in the bank so we don’t need to worry. It seems simple enough, so why is the good life so hard to achieve? Too many days I feel like one of those circus performers, spinning plates—rushing from one dangerously wobbling plate to the next and back again in an effort to stave off catastrophe. The not-so-surprising truth is that, more often than not, making an immediate beeline for whatever catches our eye or feels natural in the moment is a surefire route to disaster. “Fools rush in” is one of the key messages of this month’s cover article on workplace romance (page 32). The same could be said for the “easy fix” of credit card spending (page 48). And, as many of us are beginning to discover, the welcoming glow of our electronic devices obscures a darker reality (page 6). This month’s Signs of the Times offers some strategies for genuine meaning and lasting happiness. Check out Hara Hachi Bu (page 60) for a simple example; a healthy change you can implement at your very next meal. And the personal accounts of both Hashim Garrett (page 14) and Omar Miranda (page 20) demonstrate that it’s possible to find joy and purpose even in the midst of devastation. Self-denial, delayed gratification, sticking by the rules (page 40)—none of us want to hear it, but, way too often, discipline is the key to the good life. And if you’re anything like me, you can’t do it alone. So help me, God!
Kent KENT KINGSTON Editor
VOL 134 NO 9 ISSN 1038-9733 EXECUTIVE PUBLISHER Brad Kemp EDITOR Kent Kingston ASSISTANT EDITOR Daniel Kuberek COPYEDITOR Tracey Bridcutt GRAPHIC DESIGN Nerise McQuillan Theodora Amuimuia PHONE +61 2 9847 2222 EMAIL info@signsofthetimes.org.au WEBSITE signsofthetimes.org.au ADDRESS Adventist Media PO Box 1115, Wahroonga New South Wales 2076 SUBSCRIPTIONS Kelli Geelan PHONE +61 3 5965 6300 Australia, $A26; New Zealand, $NZ26; South Pacific countries, $A41; Other countries $A51 Published since 1886, Signs of the Times is printed 11 times a year by the Seventh-day Adventist Church and is registered as a periodical. Seventh-day Adventist Church (SPD) Limited ABN 59 093 117 689 NOTE The inclusion of a person or their image within does not imply their endorsement of the Seventh-day Adventist Church or its beliefs. Unless otherwise stated, Bible verses are from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, Anglicised. Copyright © 1979, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc®. Used by permission of Hodder & Stoughton. All rights reserved worldwide. COVER PHOTO: shironosov—Getty Images
@Kent_SignsMag SEPTEMBER 2019 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES
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WHAT IN THE WORLD THE SUNSTROKE STATE Brisbane will be “a difficult place to live” in the next 30 years, due to rapid rise in temperatures. The study by the International Journal of Climatology says hot days and nights will double by 2050 in Australia’s thirdlargest city. The study predicts an increase in deaths from the extreme heat, and more people to be at risk of illness. Scientists are alarmed by the findings, calling for politicians to take action on climate change. —ABC
OUR LAND IS DIRT BY SEA AUSTRALIA
Melbourne’s coastline is under threat from erosion, according to the Victorian Environmental Assessment Council. A report says sea levels will rise by 20 centimetres by 2040, meaning suburbs such as St Kilda, Point Cook and Mordialloc are at risk of flooding. At least nine other suburbs are considered at-risk, compounded by an expected increase in storm intensity.—The Age 4
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THOMASVOGEL—GETTY IMAGES, EGUIDE TRAVEL, SOMMAROY-FLICR-113—FLICKR, IRINA GRISKOVA, SESAME—GETTY IMAGES, FREEPIK
AUSTRALIA
38% EMOJENIUS NEW ZEALAND
Telecommunications company 2degrees has been subject to complaints for screening an advertisement featuring an eggplant emoji on national television. The emoji has often been used euphemistically in popular culture to represent male genitalia. The complaint was dismissed by the Advertising Authority Complaints Board.—newshub.co.nz
have dated a co-worker at least once in their life.
had their
OFFICE RELATIONSHIP
31%
lead to MARRIAGE.
28% have dated someone
ABOVE THEM on the
CORPORATE LADDER. CLOCKING OFF NORWAY
Residents from the Norwegian island of Sommaroy are campaigning to become a time-free zone. The area experiences daytime for up to 60 days in summer, while in winter the sun disappears. Citizens on the island are hoping business hours will change, though they’ve conceded that schools should maintain a consistent schedule. Other Norwegian settlements within the Arctic Circle are also keen to adopt the change.—independent.co.uk
18% admitted to DATING their DIRECT MANAGER.
37%
of people who’ve had office relationships
KEPT IT SECRET. Source: Careerbuilder
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THE
ILLUSION OF CONNECTION Loneliness (n): a feeling of sadness because one has no friends or company. But you are not alone. BY MARYELLEN FAIRFAX
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TOMMASO79—GETTY IMAGES SEPTEMBER 2019 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES
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I
sat slouched on the edge of my bed, blue light illuminating my face in the dark. It was the tenth time I’d checked my phone in the space of five minutes. I grimaced. Was something wrong with me? I wasn’t awaiting an urgent email, or the reply of a love interest, or my university results, or a life-changing phone call. I had already read the latest social media updates; already watched all the cookie-decorating and calligraphy videos that littered my feed; already danced between Instagram and Facebook at least five times. So why was I still glued to my phone? Instead of spending time fostering real-life relationships, I’d actively filled the void by “stalking” people online and distracting myself with frivolous entertainment. I’d begun justifying my solitary state by telling friends and family that I was “too busy to catch up”—an excuse that crumbled under the weight of hours of Instagram scrolling. Deep down, underneath a plethora of excuses, I knew exactly why I was doing these things, and it was almost laughable. I was lonely. In a global society more connected than ever before, it seems ironic that loneliness is increasing. In a survey by Opinion Way, 90 per cent of Australians said they yearned for more real-life connections, despite 56 per cent reporting that they meet up with friends less because of social media, and 70 per cent stating that they prefer to watch television
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instead of connecting with family and friends. In 2018, the Australian Loneliness Report revealed that 51 per cent of Australians feel lonely for at least one day per week, and 28 per cent feel lonely for three or more days per week. A Psychology Today blogpost referred to multiple studies that show loneliness can trigger higher levels of social anxiety, fewer social interactions, poorer sociological wellbeing and poorer quality of life. Further, lonely people are 15 per cent more likely to be depressed and 13 per cent more likely to be anxious about social interactions than those who don’t feel lonely. In other words, being lonely can trigger poor mental health, and in turn, poor mental health can cause individuals to feel even lonelier. People stuck in this cycle may lack the motivation or confidence to break free, and instead resort to poor coping mechanisms like self-harm, smoking, drug addictions or compulsive technology use. Ah yes, compulsive technology use. My personal Achilles heel. But I’m not alone. Most of us wake up to notifications first thing in the morning and check our phones right before we go to sleep. We feel naked without our devices and carry them with us everywhere we go. To avoid awkward social interactions—eye contact with strangers, failed jokes, forgetting someone’s name, Freudian slips or just embarrassing ourselves—we pull
AJ_WATT—GETTY IMAGES
out our phones and scroll instead, avoiding the need to be seen. We fear that social encounters won’t meet our expectations; that we’ll be left out and forgotten, misunderstood, insulted or won’t receive the social approval we crave. And so we avoid real-life social interactions, resorting to contrived images on a screen; the illusion of connection.
actively avoid real-life social interactions? It’s because loneliness is merely a symptom of a much deeper problem. A worthiness problem. A famous quote that often features in rom-coms and litters Pinterest feeds is: “We accept the love we think we deserve.” I’d like to elaborate and suggest that we seek out the love we
At this point, it’s important to recognise that being alone and being lonely are very different experiences. Loneliness is a feeling of distress that people experience when their social encounters are not meaningful, or when they feel misunderstood by others. In contrast, a person who is alone feels secure in their relationships, but prefers to spend time by themselves. We can be surrounded by others but still feel lonely, and in contrast, we can be alone but not feel lonely. But with so many individuals reporting feeling lonely on a regular basis, why do these same people
think we deserve. And ultimately, if we feel unworthy of love and connection, loneliness often follows. Throughout her years of research, author and public speaker, Brene Brown, discovered that vulnerability is the key to genuine, fulfilling relationships. But rather than summoning the courage to risk failure and vulnerability—elements necessary to experiencing genuine connection— we often resort to maintaining the illusion of connection. In one swift reflex motion, we open our social media apps and we quickly become addicted. SEPTEMBER 2019 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES
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P RO LE FI
Hashim Garrett (facing camera) during his Central Park interview with author Karl Faase.
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SUPPLIED BY KARL FAASE
please
God, don’t let me die!
In a single moment, Hashim Garrett’s life was changed forever. He now knows anguish, depression and the incredible power of forgiveness. BY KARL FAASE
G
rowing up,” Hashim Garrett told me, “I would have to say overall that it was pretty good. I had some bumps in the road. My mother and father separated, which was very difficult. I think the real hurdle came into our life when my mother was in a relationship with someone else. He was verbally abusive when he was under the influence
of alcohol, and physically abusive to her. Those were the moments that I remember hating somebody. I don’t remember hating anybody prior to him. The abuse was very traumatising, because one minute he could be very nice and take you to the Yankees game. Then the next minute he is yelling and threatening you.” Church was not a part of Hashim’s SEPTEMBER 2019 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES
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life as a child, growing up in New York. He found himself drawn to a different kind of community. “I joined the gang when I was in the sixth grade. I did it for a few reasons. One, I wanted to fit in and it seemed like those were the popular kids. Two, for protection. The same kids that were picking on me, I figured out if I befriended them, then they will leave me alone. In my 11-year-old mind I said, If I hang out with the bullies, they won’t pick on me. “It worked for a while and we bullied other kids, but when there was no-one else to bully they returned to bullying me. It didn’t really work out that well.” Hashim then told me about May 7, 1990, the day everything changed for him. “I was standing on the corner with some so-called friends. They were kids my mum always told me not to hang out with.” While Hashim was standing on that street corner, another young man walked past him. Hashim didn’t know him and the youth gave no indication of having even noticed him. “He said nothing to me. He didn’t give me an odd look, like he was going to do something.” What that unfamiliar stranger did that day has affected Hashim for the rest of his life. “He walked past me. All of a sudden, one of my so-called friends who was standing next to me said, ‘Look out, run!’ I took off and I started running. My first instinct was 16
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to look to see what I’m running from, but I’m not going to stop. I keep running and I look over my shoulder.” What Hashim saw was the same young man who had just walked past him—but now he was holding a submachine gun, aimed right at Hashim. “I kept running. I remember looking down at my pants leg. I noticed
“
Forgiveness is not an occasional act. It is a constant attitude.
—Dr Martin Luther King, Jr.
a weird movement. I remember thinking to myself, Why are my pants moving like this?” At that instant Hashim felt something hard strike him in the back. He was paralysed instantly. “That hard feeling was a bullet that struck me in the spine. As I hit the ground I remember calling to my friends, ‘I got shot! I got shot!’ One
or two came back, but they couldn’t help me.” His friends left him there on the ground, paralysed and scared. “I’m wondering, Why can’t I move my legs, why can’t I feel my legs? I remember looking up at the sky, going, ‘God, please don’t let me die.’ “As soon as I said it, I felt a peace
was drifting in and out of consciousness, but as the emergency medical team put him in the ambulance, he noticed that his sneakers had been removed. He was wearing brand new white socks. The first thought that popped into his mind was, My mother is going to be proud of me because I’ve got clean socks on.
come over me. The moment the words left my tongue—‘God, please don’t let me die’—all that fear left me.” At 15, Hashim had no idea what his diagnosis was, but he knew something was wrong. As he lay injured on the ground the only thing he kept thinking about was his mother. He
“My mother was always a stickler. It was ‘wear clean underwear, wear clean socks’, because you never know what is going to happen to you.” What had happened to Hashim was that he was in a very serious condition. And it was never going to get better. He knew it as soon as he came SEPTEMBER 2019 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES
SUPPLIED BY KARL FAASE
“When we talk about forgiveness, we have to talk about love,” says Hashim Garret (right), pictured with Karl and Jane Faase.
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