Signs of the Times - March 2022

THE GREAT RESIGNATION DISCONNECTED IN A CONNECTED WORLD

THE PROBLEM WITH HAPPINESS

A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON THE WORLD TODAY

IN THIS ISSUE

MARCH 2022

THE GREAT RESIGNATION

What to consider before

quitting your job PAGE 32

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CURRENT 4

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WHAT IN THE WORLD DISCONNECTED IN A CONNECTED WORLD You won't find the solution online

WELLBEING

12 THE PROBLEM WITH

HAPPINESS

Meaning vs happiness 24 BETTER HEALTH FOR

38

FAITH

18 WHAT IS THE BIBLE?

And why you should give it a read 26 LAW OF LOVE Ticket, barrier or something else?

38 THINGS WE FORGET ABOUT MARTIN LUTHER KING JR

SCIENCE & TECH

52 THE CUTTING EDGE EVERY BODY Health news that Engineering, science makes a difference and technology news 46 REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS The secret of lasting relationships

60 PORTION CONTROL FOR

A HEALTHY WEIGHT

FIND US ON SOCIAL MEDIA 2

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CULTURE

54 SERIES PUTS SPOTLIGHT

ON FAMILY VIOLENCE

Television review: Maid

FUN

62 CROSSWORD AND

SUDOKU

Have you been paying

attention?

THE RIGHT HABITS The buzz of the new year may be starting to fade.

There's still some lingering warm weather (depending on where you live), but most of us have now returned from our holidays and it's back to business. This is a highly critical moment to set the right tone for the rest of the year—the inspiration we felt at the start of the year is likely starting to wane, giving us a more honest look at our goals, ambitions and even New Year's resolutions.

Do I continue on with change, or do I revert to the way things were before? These are questions that statistics say most Australians are asking themselves. Korey Dowling explores this phenomenon further, and how it's manifesting in people leaving their current jobs in search of something new (p32).

Statistics also say many people were considering quitting social media in 2021—Kymberley McMurray explores this phenomenon on page 6 and suggests practical tips for reducing screen time. Improving one's relationships is also at the forefront of many people's minds—Relationships Australia says 42 per cent of surveyed people found isolation had a negative impact on their relationships. If you feel similar, why not check out Genia Ruscu's article about the secrets of lasting relationships (p46). Former Signs editor Bruce Manners also explores how to maximise happiness while searching for meaning (p12). This is amongst a number of other pieces, like the truth you may not know about Martin Luther King Jr (p38) and how the Bible changed someone who had struggled to open its covers (p18). I'm sure you'll find value between the covers of this month's Signs too!

Daniel

DANIEL KUBEREK Assistant editor

VOL 137 NO 3 ISSN 1038-9733 EXECUTIVE PUBLISHER Brad Kemp EDITOR Jarrod Stackelroth ASSISTANT EDITOR Daniel Kuberek COPYEDITOR Tracey Bridcutt GRAPHIC DESIGN Theodora Pau'u Talia Valderrama PHONE +61 2 9847 2222 EMAIL info@signsofthetimes.org.au WEBSITE signsofthetimes.org.au ADDRESS Adventist Media PO Box 1115, Wahroonga New South Wales 2076 SUBSCRIPTIONS Kelli Geelan PHONE +61 3 5965 6300 Australia/New Zealand, $A26; South Pacific countries, $A41; Other countries $A51 Published since 1886, Signs of the Times is printed 11 times a year by the Seventh-day Adventist Church and is registered as a periodical.

Seventh-day Adventist Church (SPD) Limited ABN 59 093 117 689 NOTE The inclusion of a person or their image within does not imply their endorsement of the Seventh-day Adventist Church or its beliefs.

Unless otherwise stated, Bible verses are from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, Anglicised. Copyright © 1979, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc®. Used by permission of Hodder & Stoughton. All rights reserved worldwide.

COVER PHOTO: Norma Mortenson, Pexels Typography by AMN

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WHAT IN THE WORLD GETTING ON TOO MANY BEERS AUSTRALIA

NITRATE IN WATER NEW ZEALAND

New Zealand's water supply has come under question as it's been found nitrate contamination may be leading to 80 deaths per year. More than 800,000 people were found to be affected, with doctors linking the chemical to bowel cancer. Politicians are increasingly pushing for water reforms in the country after 8320 people became sick in the 2016 Havelock North campylobacter outbreak.—RNZ 4

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FRED MOON—UNSPLASH, ANDRES SIIMON—UNSPLASH, WIKIMEDIA COMMONS, WIKIMEDIA COMMONS

The 2021 Global Drug Survey revealed Australians are the heaviest drinkers in the world. Heavy drinking brought on by pandemic lockdowns saw Australians report getting drunk an average 27 times in 2020, compared to the global average of 15. The report also found women are more likely to regret excessive drinking, while one in four respondents also admitted to using psychadelic drugs amidst a rise in illicit drug use.—Global Drug Survey

THE GREAT

RESIGNATION Australian data from October 2021 found a 26 per cent increase in employees leaving their job for another company—compared to the same time in 2019.—Linkedin, The "GLORIFIED GAS CHAMBER" SWITZERLAND

The "Sarco" machine—a 3D printed euthanasia capsule developed by controversial Australian former doctor Philip Nitschke—has passed legal review in Switzerland. The portable machine kills its client by reducing the oxygen in the chamber to one per cent, and has been dubbed a "glorified gas chamber" by critics. 1300 people chose an assisted death in Switzerland in 2020.—SWI

Sun-Herald

An August 2021 survey found 73.8 per cent of North American employers are struggling to attract new employees.

—Willis Towers Watson

A survey in May 2021 found more than half of employees would quit their job in a post-pandemic world if they are not granted working flexibilities.—EY An economic study has found the cost for an employer to replace an employee and train a new one is priced at 122 per cent of their annual salary.

—Oxford Economics

SURFACE-LEVEL HUMAN RIGHTS AFGHANISTAN

The Taliban government has promised that women aren't to be considered "property" and must consent before being married. An ambiguous statement released by the Taliban also said women are "noble and free human being[s]".

The statement has been greeted with scepticism as the Taliban has recently been persuading the international community to resume frozen aid funds.—Reuters

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DISCONNECTED IN A

CONNECTED WORLD Turn your phone on silent and read on: it’s time to look for meaning in a social media-saturated world.

BY KYMBERLEY MCMURRAY

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very Sunday morning at around 9am, I receive a notification.

Before I even touch my phone, I already know what it is and dread looking at it. Some weeks, I choose to ignore the notification completely until finally, I give in. I need my phone, but I can’t use it without seeing that notification. Maybe you can already guess what it is?

There’s nothing wrong with Apple’s Screen Time feature. I receive a comprehensive list of all the apps I have used throughout the week and how much time I have spent on them, but this is the problem—it works too well. Every time I look at the weekly reports of my phone usage, a wave of guilt hits me. It’s a reminder of how reliant I am on social media, with an average of four hours per day lost by mindlessly scrolling on Facebook and Instagram.

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According to data by Genroe, 96.4 per cent of Australian internet users aged between 16 and 64 accessed a social media network or messaging service in December 2020, with a total of 80 per cent of the population active on social media. As a country, Australia’s social media usage is currently at its peak saturation level. There are similar trends like this across the world: according to Statista, 88.5 per cent of the United Kingdom’s population and 82 per cent of the United States population used some form of digital media in 2020.

Due to Covid-19 we have become more reliant on technology and digital media to keep workplaces, universities, schools and places of worship running. For the past two years, we have been forced to rely on apps to interact with those who

“ are not in our immediate household.

As a society, we are more connected digitally than we have ever been before. And yet, according to a survey conducted by the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, almost half of the people surveyed reported that they have felt lonely since March 2020.

A quick online search for “social media” will reveal a common theme, with headlines such as “How to do a social media detox” and “Why quitting social media was the best decision of my life.” Celebrities and influencers across the world are now warning their audiences about the dangers of social media and its increasingly negative impact on mental health.

Social media is in fact, everything but social. The whole idea of Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat

and other platforms is that we build our networks, keeping up to date with the people around us and creating a sense of community. It is common to have hundreds or even thousands of followers and friends online—so why isn’t social media providing us with the connection we long for?

Ironically, it appears that as our screen time has gone up, our connection with others has gone down.

How often do you find yourself sitting at a restaurant with friends, staring down at your phone instead of creating conversation? I’ll be the first to admit that I am guilty of pulling my phone out at the first sign of a break in conversation. What about in the workplace or at church? I could list so many other scenarios. We have conditioned ourselves to place more importance on our phones and social MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES.ORG.AU

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Almost half of the people surveyed reported that they felt lonely

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media than our real-life connections with others, and this is why we are left feeling disconnected and isolated at the end of the day.

In 2012, the term “phubbing” first emerged to describe the situation where someone uses their phone to snub a person who is trying to talk to them. Experts have warned against this behaviour suggesting that phubbing is not only hurting our relationships, but also our own mental health.

As humans, we were created to live in relationship with others and social media just doesn’t fully satisfy the connection we need to sustain long and healthy relationships. When we interact online, we are missing important elements of conversation such as being able to read physical and verbal cues, and touch. Without these elements, our interaction with others is lacking. The unfortunate irony is that many of us who have experienced the isolation and loneliness of the past lockdowns have now become adjusted to this way of living. Re-connecting with others offline has been a struggle for many people, and ultimately some have chosen to simply make online living a permanent reality.

So how do we get the connection we crave with others in an online world? Is it time to disconnect so that we can connect? Many of us need access to social media for our work and school. However, taking a break has enormous benefits for our overall 10

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Why not try a digital Sabbath too?

and spend time with God—the possibilities are endless! A study by the University of Beirut showed that students who participated in a digital detox for 24 hours or more reported positive changes to their mood, reduced anxiety, better productivity and improved sleeping patterns.

The Bible already describes the seventh day of the week, Saturday, as a rest day provided by God, “made for man[kind]” (Mark 2:27). Why not try a digital Sabbath too?

Not only will these suggestions benefit your mental and physical health, but you won’t feel as guilty

as I do when you get your Screen Time report each week—now that’s something to aim for! I don’t know about you, but I want to reduce my online presence so I can increase my offline presence—because at the end of the day, that’s the presence that really counts.

Instead of focusing on followers, I want to focus on meaningful relationships. Instead of tracking my engagement, I want to engage with others. Instead of meaningless conversations, I want to connect with others on a deeper level. I want my inbox to be empty, but my heart to be full. When we shift our focus away from the online world, we can focus on making the most out of our offline one. As 2022 ramps up, I encourage you to think about how social media impacts your life—and if needed—how you can find ways to disconnect so you can connect. Interested in other ways to live healthy?

Why not try the free course Living Well at <discover.hopechannel.com/ living-well>.

Kymberley McMurray is a communication coordinator and assistant editor for the Victorian Conference of the Seventh-day Adventist Church. She lives in Melbourne, Victoria.

WUNDERVISUALS—GETTY IMAGES

wellbeing. Experts suggest that even cutting your screen time 30 minutes before you go to bed can increase your quality of sleep. Why wouldn’t you want better quality sleep? I know I do.

You don’t have to take drastic measures to become more connected to reality, but if you’re up for the challenge, why not dedicate a whole day to switching off? Take those 24 hours to spend time in nature, read a book, exercise, catch up with a friend

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THE PROBLEM WITH HAPPINESS SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU • MARCH 2022

Many people say they “just want to be happy”. But is that enough or is it better to chase fulfilment and purpose?

BY BRUCE MANNERS

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ould you rather “achieve great things or be happy?”

That question was asked in a YouGov survey (United States): 81 per cent said they would rather be happy; 13 per cent wanted to achieve great things; 6 per cent were uncertain.

The results were no surprise to University of London’s Nat Rutherford. “Our culture’s fixation on happiness can seem almost religious.

It’s one of the only reasons for action that doesn’t stand in need of justification: happiness is good because being happy is good. But can we build our lives on that circular reasoning?”

Happiness is important, but is it the most important thing in life? Too often happiness is tied up with “I’ll be happy when . . .”

Psychotherapist Ilene Cohen explains it this way: “I’ll be happy when I get that job I applied for; I’ll be happy when I get that purse I’ve been saving up for; I’ll be happy when I’m in a relationship; I’ll be happy when I get that raise” and so on.

“Most of us live in a constant pursuit of happiness,” she adds. “If your basic needs are met and your life isn’t in imminent danger, you’re more than likely searching for happiness in one way or another.”

But happiness isn’t enough.

the search for a meaningful life

“A happy and a meaningful life have some differences,” says Roy Baumeister, from Florida State University. He and his colleagues 14

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surveyed 397 adults looking for “correlations between their levels of happiness, meaning and various other aspects of their lives”.

They found that “a meaningful life and a happy life often go handin-hand—but not always”. They emphasised the major differences they discovered between them: Happy people satisfy their wants and needs, but that seems largely irrelevant to a meaningful life. Things like health, wealth and ease in life are related to happiness, but not to meaning.

Happiness involves being focused on the present, whereas meaningfulness involves thinking more about the past, present and future—and the relationship between them. In simple terms, happiness was seen as fleeting, meaningfulness lasted much longer.

Meaningfulness is derived from giving to other people; happiness comes from what they give to you. Social connections were found to be linked to happiness and meaning. Spending time with friends brings happiness more than meaning, while spending time with loved ones brings meaning, but not necessarily happiness.

Meaningful lives involve stress and challenges. In fact, higher levels of worry, stress and anxiety brought higher meaningfulness but lower happiness. This “suggests that engaging in challenging or difficult situations that are beyond oneself or one’s pleasures promotes meaningfulness but not happiness”.

Self-expression is important to

making it personal

So, how do you go about finding meaning? It’s a personal journey, explains Alicia Nortje from University of Cape Town in South Africa.

“What brings me meaning might not bring you meaning.” However, she makes several suggestions: Foster a passion. Motivation helps to get things done—washing the dishes, for instance. In contrast, passion “is the driving force for activities that have significance for us”. While there are negative passions, “positive, harmonious passions improve our behaviour and lead to optimal

functioning”.

And those with passions have stronger relationships with those who share these passions.

Develop and foster social relationships. “Making connections with other individuals and maintaining these relationships are reliable ways to develop a sense of meaningfulness.”

Those with fewer social connections, or who are lonely or ostracised report a lower sense of meaningfulness. In contrast, those who share passions with like-minded individuals develop harmonious passions, which can generate a sense of meaningfulness.

Focus on relationships that increase your sense of belonging. Not all social relationships are equal. “Make sure to focus on relationships that make you feel like you ‘belong,’ where you feel like you fit in with the members of that group, and where there is group identification.”

People who feel they belong report higher rates of meaningfulness.

Monitor your mood. There’s a

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meaning but not happiness. Expressing oneself and caring about such things as personal identity (considering oneself to be creative, for instance) and cultural identity were linked to a meaningful life but not necessarily a happy one.

Baumeister even argues that “seeking happiness without meaning would probably be a stressful, aggravating and annoying proposition”.

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relationship between a positive mood and a sense of meaning. Managing your mood can be difficult, admits Nortje, but it can be done through such things as making time for interests and hobbies, getting enough sleep, exercising regularly and eating healthily.

Take control of your environment.

Routines, patterns, time blocking and clean spaces can all contribute to “an increased ability to make sense of one’s environment, which in turn can lead to an increased sense of meaningfulness”.

An ordered life helps with such things as a fixed routine, but with time for unexpected tasks and downtime for exercise and passions—and tidiness (“your desk is not the place for all those dirty coffee mugs”).

There will always be the unexpected. However, “these experiences will have less of a negative impact if you already have a sense of control over your environment”.

WIKICOMMONS

finding meaning in the worst of times

Born in 1905 in Vienna, Viktor Frankl (a Jew) was a medical doctor who also worked with psychiatric patients before the Second World War. In 1942, nine months after marrying Tilly, he and his family were sent to a concentration camp where his father died. In 1944, the family was taken to Auschwitz where his mother and brother were gassed. Tilly died of typhus in Bergen-Belsen.

Frankl, inmate number 119,104,

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spent three years in four different concentration camps.

In his classic work, Man’s Search for Meaning, Frankl wrote of his experience and how everything can be taken from humans, except “the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way”.

In these camps, he found that the way the inmates accepted their fate and suffering—the way “we take up our cross”—gave opportunity “to add a deeper meaning to life. It [life] may remain brave, dignified and unselfish.” Or, in the fight for self-preservation, humans may “become no more than an animal”.

The choice was there, is there, to be made.

In a letter to friends on his return from the camps, he wrote of his strong “affirmation of life”. He added, “If I had not had this rocksolid, positive view of life—what would have become of me in these last weeks, in those months in the camp? But I now see things in a larger dimension.

“I see increasingly that life is so very meaningful, that in suffering and even in failure there must still be meaning.”

Even in his brief marriage with Tilly, “What we have experienced cannot be undone, it has been, but this having-been is perhaps the most certain form of being.”

A few days after his liberation from Auschwitz, Frankl was walking

past flowering meadows near the camp. Larks were singing. “There was nothing but the wide earth and sky and the lark’s jubilation and freedom of space.”

He stopped and fell to his knees.

“At that moment there was little I knew of myself or the world—I had but one sentence in mind—always the same: ‘I called to the Lord from my narrow prison and He answered me in the freedom of peace’ (Psalm 118:5).” He has no idea how many times he repeated the thought, but “in that hour, my new life started”.

His experience may have added, “deeper meaning to life”, but it also helped him survive the hell of concentration camps.

This was something mere happiness could not do— there was little happiness in Auschwitz.

Having survived, Frankl said, “Step by step I progressed, until I became a human being.” Again.

Bruce Manners is a retired Signs of the Times editor, having served in the role from 1989–2003. He lives in Melbourne, Australia.

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WHAT

IS THE BIBLE?

The book that has captivated millions around the globe might be a lot more real and relatable than you’d think . . .

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BY JUSTIN BONE

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e stood in the desert heat squinting into the sun as the tour guide waggled his finger at a tiny cave entrance a few hundred metres away. “That’s the cave,” he announced to our sweaty tour group.

We all took our photographs. The cave was across a steep valley and not a place where tourists were allowed to enter—this was a special cave.

According to our guide, a bored Bedouin shepherd boy named Muhammed was throwing rocks into cave entrances on a cliff when he heard a smash come from one of them. He had hit a ceramic storage jar and contained within it were ancient Jewish and Hebrew religious documents many hundreds of years old. He took them back to his father, and they eventually made their way to an antiquities dealer where someone recognised them for what they were. One of the scrolls was a thousand years older than any known copy already in existence. Scholars were astonished at the preservation of these documents—the conditions in the cave were ideal to prevent their deterioration over time. Eventually, from 11 different caves in the area, scholars were able to recover more than 900 different documents.

We were standing at Qumran, near the Dead Sea in Israel, and the tour guide was pointing at what is known as “cave number four” where more than 90 per cent of the Dead Sea Scrolls were discovered in 1946.

A fair few of the scrolls were copies of scripture in Hebrew, and they are

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remarkably unchanged from what we read in the Bible today.

I wonder what you think of when you hear the word Bible? Growing up I knew my family had a Bible in our bookshelf but we never opened it up.

I really didn’t know what was in it.

And honestly, for many of my younger years I didn’t really care. I would hear sermons at my church but I didn’t understand them, and they didn’t really seem to be about anything I could relate to.

Later in life, going through difficult times, I wondered if the Bible could help me. One day I wandered into a bookstore, bought a Bible, took it home and placed it next to my bed just hoping that somehow its presence would mean life would start to get better, as though it was a magic talisman.

It didn’t work.

Turns out I had forgotten the most basic fact about the Bible. It’s a collection of stories that are for reading. To get the most out of the book I needed to open the cover. There are 66 books in my Bible, from Genesis to Revelation.

Each of those books tells a story about how people had an encounter with God, and what happened when

God entered their lives. The Bible is a book of stories.

real stories

Those scrolls found in the Judean desert showed that the stories we read in the Bible today are the same stories that were written down thousands of years ago. They are very real stories, they haven’t been sanitised, but share

but what the Bible relates puts it to shame. There are stories of war and brutal battles against ferocious enemies. But there are also stories and poems from people heartsick and crying out to God wondering why He won’t answer. There are words from people who were afraid, had regrets in their lives and needed help.

There are stories of people who had

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It's a collection of stories that are for reading. To get the most out of the book I needed to open the cover

the warts and all stories of people who experienced God’s intervention in the course of their lives.

Some of the books in the Bible tell the story of the Hebrew people and their escape from slavery through God’s intervention and led by a prince of Egypt. You might think Game of Thrones told a sordid tale,

everything in life but then lost it all.

There are tales of political intrigue and revenge. The Bible doesn’t hold back or try and make its characters look perfect. They are people living their lives with good times and failures for everyone to see. But at some point each of the people have encountered God. MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES.ORG.AU

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more than simply stories

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When you read enough of those stories from the Bible you start to see a common thread running through them. Despite these stories being written over the course of hundreds of years by very different people, the message is consistent. God is telling His people that one day He would intervene to fix the issues they had by sending a Saviour. Isaiah 9:6 says it this way: “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given . . . And he will be called Wonderful Counsellor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” The consistency of this message shows that God had inspired each of these authors to write down their experiences with Him. Others recognised the truth of what they wrote and that’s why those books were kept as sacred; because God wanted these stories to be read and to inspire, encourage and teach others who were searching for Him. An example is the revelation about where that promised Son would be born.

Micah 5:2 says “But you Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times.”

Jesus’ arrival fulfilled this prophecy, SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU • MARCH 2022

showing more than just human imagination was inspiring the stories written in the Bible.

Jesus’ story

Jesus was born in Bethlehem, the One who had been promised and written about

centuries earlier. The New Testament tells the stories of Jesus and His followers. These stories were written down by those who knew and had seen Jesus. They were written at a time when there could have been

enough witnesses to deny what the stories in the Bible say, but we don’t see that happening in the written accounts. Instead, we see the life of Jesus recorded by non-Christian historians like Josephus.

When I started reading these stories, I noticed something about

love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”, and those words would ring in my ears and persist in my thoughts all day. I would ponder if there was anyone I considered my enemy, and how I treated them. How should I treat them? How would my life be different if I moved away from hate and toward loving and praying for those who harmed me? I found myself changing because of the words I was reading.

our story

The Bible isn’t just about others encountering God. It is a way for us to encounter Him through the stories of others, and the words Jesus spoke that changed the world. The Bible can have an impact on us today. When I ask people what they think of when they hear the Bible’s words, the most common answer is that they don’t really know much about it. If that’s your answer, let me recommend the most astonishing book of stories you will ever read—it just might change your life!

them. They were changing me.

I would read what Jesus says, something simple like Matthew 5:43,44—“You have heard that it was said ‘Love your neighbour and hate your enemy’. But I tell you,

Justin Bone supports and trains pastors and congregations around Victoria for the Seventh-day Adventist Church. He is passionate about helping people understand the Bible better.

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BETTER HEALTH for every body WITH

DR SIMONE KOOKE

DIET FOR THE ENVIRONMENT

MEDITATION FOR FEWER MISTAKES PLANT-BASED DIET AND COGNITIVE IMPAIRMENT

Spanish researchers have identified dietary elements that protect brain function as we age. People with a higher intake of polyphenol rich foods—such as apples, cocoa, green tea, blueberries, oranges and pomegranates—were more protected from declining brain function.

Consumption of artificial sweeteners was shown to have the opposite effect.—Molecular Nutrition and Food Research 24

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Researchers from Michigan State University found that even after a single session, those who meditated were more likely to pick up and act on mistakes in a brain function test. Positive news for those who are in the habit . . .—Brain Sciences

EDGAR CASTREJON, ELLA OLSSON, EVERDROP—PEXELS AND WIKICOMMONS

German researchers recently compared a vegan diet to a Mediterranean diet in terms of their environmental impact. While a vegan diet was great from an animal welfare viewpoint, the production of vegan food used a large amount of water, and often needed supplementation of nutrients and minerals like vitamins B12, D and calcium. A Mediterranean diet isn't perfect either—the fish in this diet is better for the environment, but less good on the animal welfare front. However, both were more environmentally sound than a meat-dominant diet.

—Science Direct

YOGHURT FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

With high blood pressure being a very common health concern, an everyday food item may hold the key to keeping this under control.

South Australian researchers found that consumption of yoghurt­even on a one-off basis or intermittently—could reduce blood pressure. Regular consumption produced more benefit. If you’re needing a snack, you could definitely do worse.

—Science Direct

STILLBIRTH 4X HIGHER WITH DELTA STRAIN

HOUSEHOLD DISINFECTANT AND RISK OF SUPERBUGS

The Covid-19 pandemic has changed the way we clean, with disinfectants and antibacterials becoming standard issue over the last two years. However, researchers from Macquarie University have cautioned that “household grade” products—like benzalkolonium chloride—may be doing more harm than good by allowing the bacteria that are resistant to them to thrive.

While there is a time and place for bleach, plain old soap and water can also do the job.—European Society of Cardiology

Being pregnant during a pandemic adds a whole layer of stress to expectant parents. Research from the United States demonstrated a frightening four-fold increase in risk of stillbirth in mothers who contracted Covid-19, with this increasing in likelihood as their condition worsened. Stillbirth rates for women who did not have Covid-19 remained the same.

Preventing Covid-19 infection is absolutely the safest option for expectant mothers and their babies.—CDC Dr Simone Kooke is a Sydney general practitioner and mum of two who loves to help her patients and family make simple, practical lifestyle improvements that will increase their longevity and quality of life.

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of love

God’s law was given many years ago.

Does it still have relevance for us today?

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BY BRIANNA WATSON

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to do with the law of God? Answer: Not a lot. They are merely examples of dated legislation, laws that made greater sense in past social contexts than they do today.

So is this true of God’s law?

Do laws handwritten on tablets of stone (commonly known as the Ten Commandments) and delivered to the Israelites all those millennia ago truly still hold relevance for our lives today? Laws passed from God to man, generation to generation— inscribed on stone and parchment, printed on paper and projected onto screens.

For me, my answer is yes! I wholeheartedly believe these laws continue to be relevant today.

Growing up as the youngest and only girl (with two brothers who towered over me in both age and height) led to an education of observation—watching both the actions and resulting consequences of my brothers’ behaviour. Like a miniature scientist (minus the lab coat), I would watch my brothers test the limits and learned where each and every line was placed so years later, when my turn came, I didn’t have to risk searching for it.

For the Israelites, their experience was not the same. Their role in history paralleled the role of my brothers. Pioneers in the desert. After being

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otatoes, pigeons and disrupting a wedding. Struggling to find a connection? Each of these objects or actions is the basis for somewhat strange pieces of Australian legislation still in effect today!

Thinking of selling or purchasing more than 50kg of potatoes in Western Australia? Well at that quantity these tasty little morsels could land you with a $A2000 fine under Section 22 of the Marketing of Potatoes Act 1946. And injuring a homing pigeon in Victoria or South Australia is a definite offence under the respective Summary Offences Act of those states. Finally, in South Australia, obstructing or disturbing a wedding, funeral or any religious service is an offence attracting a maximum penalty of $10,000 or two years’ imprisonment (Summary Offences Act 1953 (SA) Section 7A).

Curiosity satisfied but what do these laws have

spiritual needs remain. God knew captives in Egypt, held as slaves for this when He gave us His law all such a long time, their those years ago. decision-making abilities were The purpose of God’s law is to impeded, along with their capacity guide us through life. Knowing and for self-care. Much like the care my understanding God’s law is almost parents took in raising their children akin to your teacher allowing you to and teaching us how to care for ourtake a “cheat sheet” into your exam, selves, God, as the Israelites’ Father, containing the formulas you will gave them His law as an act of love.

As a hands-on parent, God inscribed need for the scenarios you will face. these guidelines with His own finger, But is God’s law a ticket or a barrier?

Does following God’s law grant you a passing them to His children for place in heaven? their benefit Or does the and protection inability to (Exodus always follow 31:18).

God’s law presThat love is the same love ent an obstacle that God has to eternal life? for us today; Personally, I do and those same not subscribe to Commandeither of these God knew the future theories. God’s ments are law is neither intended for when He gave humanity a ticket, nor a our benefit and barrier. protection, as the Ten Commandments We cannot they were for earn our way the Israelites all to heaven or those years ago. eternal life by keeping God’s law, While our situation has changed— because if this was the requirement, our technology and education—our no-one would be there. Nothing that need for a Saviour remains. Unlike we can do, on our own, is capable laws written by men who cannot of earning us eternal life. “For by know the future, God knew the grace you have been saved through future when He gave humanity the faith . . . it is the gift of God, not Ten Commandments. He knew how of works, lest anyone should boast” the world would transform and He (Ephesians 2:8,9 NKJV)1. Eternal life knew that we would still need His guidance to protect us from our own is not something God offers to those destructive tendencies. Our physical who earn it or work the hardest, but environment has changed, but our is instead a question of faith. What

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does faith mean? Accepting that God as our Creator sent His Son Jesus to save us from death and evil, and accepting Jesus’ gift of His life is all it takes. No fine print and no expiry date. This process is not possible because of anything that we have done or will do. Jesus’ death and life on our behalf is the greatest gift, an undeserved gift that we are incapable of returning back to Him. God’s law has been crafted by the Creator of the universe, the Creator of you and of me. You don’t question the washing instructions that come with a new clothing purchase because you know that the manufacturer knows best what their product is made of and how to care for it. So why do we question our Creator, who knows what we are made of and how to care for us?

Jesus lived a life that fulfilled the law. He claimed in Matthew 5:17 that the purpose of His mission on Earth was not to overthrow or destroy the law of God, but to fulfil it. He lived a life in harmony with God’s law and challenged human beings to live a life that was not just about outward appearances of obedience, but to think about why we do what we do. He used the example of how being angry in your heart is just like murder. God’s law says do not murder, but Jesus challenged us to expand the definition of murder, saying that if we wished to murder someone in our heart, it was just as bad, causing us to hold onto bitterness—it is against the principle or 30

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spirit of God’s law. Jesus, reflecting on God’s law against adultery, said that if we lust after someone in our minds, it is like we have done the deed we imagined. Jesus was pointing to the fact that we can’t really keep the law, not without God. But He could. As an example of a life lived in constant communication with God and harmony with God’s will, Jesus succeeded in keeping the law, where we as human beings would fail.

Jesus knew the best way for us to live was in harmony with the principles of God. And that God’s law could be boiled down to two main concepts: love God and love others.

This is a recipe for fulfilment.

Jesus ends His discussion of God’s laws in Matthew 5 and 6 (commonly known as the “Sermon on the Mount”) with the encouragement to His followers not to worry about anything because God is in control and cares what happens to each and every one.

Following God’s law can provide a sense of purpose and security.

What a difference it makes when we decide to wholeheartedly trust the Creator; to humbly accept His will and to follow His law of love—the law of God. Want to know more?

Send us a line at <info@signsofthetimes.org.au>.

Brianna Watson is a policy officer for the Australian Government in Canberra where she is married and is a dog mum.

Verses marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used with permission. All rights reserved.

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SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU • MARCH 2022

Recent statistics suggest many people are considering a career change. Before you hand in your resignation letter, there are a few things worth considering.

CHARNCHAI—GETTY IMAGES

BY KOREY DOWLING

MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES.ORG.AU

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that 70 per cent of people say they ealth impacts aside, Covid-19 define their life purpose through has provided many people work. Purpose, however, is split with the opportunity to reset into individual and organisational and re-evaluate what is important purpose. Knowing your individual to them. Considering Gettysburg College claims at least a third of your purpose is quite important in helping to guide the key decisions about why life is spent working, it is important that you find a fulfilling career. “The you want/need to work, what career you will find fulfilling and the type Great Resignation” has been making of organisation you want to work for. headlines recently with an estimated Having an idea of what is driving 25 per cent of Australians looking to re-assess their work options by either you will help you understand the type of work and switching organisation you roles at their should be aiming work to somefor. If your thing that purpose is found better fulfils in motivating their needs, or factors like by resigning providing the altogether.

It's important to resources needed While the to support jury is still carefully analyse why your family or out whether you are thinking of giving you the “The Great means to travel, Resignation” leaving your job then finding an is a long-term organisation that phenomenon, unequivocally this is an opaligns with your values and beliefs portunity for every individual to stop may not be as critical. However, if and evaluate their own career and your driving force is more intrinsic— decide: Is this what I really want to if you can work for an organisation be doing? If not, what can I do about that you believe in—you are far more it? Here are some things to consider likely to love what you do! We all before making a radical career shift. have aspects of our jobs that don’t excite us, but if you can see that find purpose even the less desirable tasks are still If you’re able to find purpose in helping to contribute to a greater your job, you are much more likely purpose, you’re more likely to find to be fully engaged and loving what meaning and satisfaction in those you do. Research conducted by tasks.

McKinsey Global Institute found

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ANDRESR—GETTY IMAGES

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research

Before you decide to hand in your resignation, it’s important to double check what the employment market is doing in your industry area. Regardless of what media outlets are calling it, “The Great Resignation” may not necessarily be happening in your work field. This means that opportunities may not be as plentiful as you thought they might be. Research popular job sites for key positions and assess if there is a growing opportunity for a shift in roles. Reach out to key networks in your vocation and understand the real-world situation.

the grass is not always greener

It’s important to carefully analyse why you are thinking of leaving your job. Is it because you’re not getting along with your manager? Do you feel you’re not being valued? Are you looking for a company with a different purpose? Analysing your desire to leave will assist you with articulating what you’re looking for, and help you decide if it’s truly better elsewhere—or maybe the grass on this side isn’t so bad after all. Be sure to have a longer-term view of your career progression. Jumping careers is not always advisable and certainly depends on the reason for the jump.

Reach out to trusted mentors in your vocation to get a better picture of what it takes to progress in that area.

think before you quit

It’s easier to find a new job while MARCH 2022 • SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU

35

you already have a job. Unfortunately, bias is still a real issue where candidates are unfairly judged for being out of work. Also, some employers view employees who are unemployed as a red flag, without taking the time to dive deeper into the reasons why an individual is between opportunities. When you are currently employed and searching for a job, you can appear to be a little harder to get, and therefore more attractive to the prospective employer.

preparing to job seek

A lot of the hard work in acquiring a new job is done before the interview. Researching prospective organisations is a crucial step in preparing yourself for the recruitment process. In your particular vocation, it is good to know what trends are occurring in that field: 1. Have there been any significant changes in your sector over the last five years?

2. What are the larger organisations in the sector doing (think mergers and acquisitions etc)?

3. Are there any recent legislative changes that will affect the sector?

4. What are the latest innovations affecting the sector?

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Once you’re clearer on the sector-wide information, start specifically researching the individual organisations which you are seeking to join: 1. Know who the key personnel are.

2. Understand the organisation’s mission statement and organisational values.

3. Try to access any organisation reports and strategy documents to get a picture of where they are currently at, and an understanding of where they might be headed.

4. Visit the “About us” page of their website as well as social media platforms to get a picture of current news, events and information.

job application

One common mistake that job seekers make is to create a generic resume and use that same resume for every job application. Your job application should specifically address and connect with the relevant job advertisement. According to HR Dive, recruiters spend an average 7.4 seconds reviewing a job application.

You need to ensure that the key information they are looking for is readily accessible. Ensure that the

interview

Once you are at the interview stage, a lot of the hard work has been done! You have a clear understanding of the organisation’s mission and values, as well as knowledge of who the key people are. Also, because you have shaped your job application to specifically suit the requirements of the role, you have a better grasp of what they might be looking for.

All you need to do now is ace the interview. To adequately prepare for the questions they might ask you, think about your own experiences,

both work and personal, and how they might relate to the position. It is quite likely that the interviewers will ask you questions like “tell me about a time when you managed a project to completion; interacted with a difficult co-worker; were faced with a problem you couldn’t solve” etc. Thinking through your work experience or personal/study experiences and thinking of examples that might be relevant in a new role will help you prepare for these types of questions.

So, before you hand in your notice, be sure to stop and think about what is important to you and what it is about your current job that is prompting you to look elsewhere.

As it says in Proverbs 15:22, “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.” Seek the guidance of trusted people around you. If you decide to start the job search process after that, be sure to do your research and adequately prepare to maximise your chances of landing your dream job.

Korey Dowling works as VP People and Culture at ADRA International. Originally from Brisbane, in his current role he lives and works in Maryland, United States.

MARCH 2022 • SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU

COURTNEYK—GETTY IMAGES

minimum requirements for the role (qualifications and experience) are easy to view by using a format that provides this information near the top of the resume. There are many resources online, such as Novoresume, which can assist you. It is also important that the key words referenced in the job advertisement are also found in your resume.

Many organisations use automated Applicant Tracking Systems (ATS) which automatically scan your resume for desired key words. If you can’t match them, you are less likely to be selected to progress to the next round.

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SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU • MARCH 2022

Growing reverence for Martin Luther King Jr as an iconic leader of the Civil Rights Movement has come at the cost of forgetting—or diminishing—some key aspects of his life, his work and his voice.

BY NATHAN BROWN

MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES.ORG.AU

UNSEEN-HISTORIES—UNSPLASH

THINGS WE FORGET ABOUT MARTIN LUTHER KING JR

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leader of the Civil Rights Movement easuring more than nine in the United State in the 1950s and metres tall, the pale granite ‘60s and a global voice for justice, carving of Dr King that is the in the decades since his death has centrepiece of the Martin Luther come at the cost of forgetting—or King Jr Memorial, just to the east diminishing—some key aspects of his of the National Mall in downtown life, his work and his voice. Visiting Washington DC, makes it easy to the Martin Luther King Jr National forget that he was a relatively short Historical Park—covering a few city man. His iconic likeness towers over blocks in an older neighbourhood visitors as his words carved into the just to the northeast of downtown stone walls around the site preserve Atlanta, Georgia—offers some his prophetic voice. important reminders.

Situated in a direct line of sight The first thing we need to between the Lincoln Memorial— remember to from whose steps understand the he delivered his work of Dr King famous 17is that it was minute speech grounded in the to the crowds Black church. assembled for With both its the “March on contemporary Washington for and historical Jobs and FreeEven the place of his buildings on dom” on August birth was an act of the National 28, 1963—and Park site, the the Jefferson resistance Ebenezer Baptist Memorial on the Church was the other side of the church in which Tidal Basin, it is Dr King was raised and the church easy to forget that Dr King was not he eventually pastored, as had his universally admired in his lifetime. father and grandfather before him.

Instead, he was often described as And this faith was the foundation for a troublemaker, an agitator and his work for justice. possibly “a communist”. That he Just to the east along Auburn would be honoured in this way less Avenue is the house in which Dr than 45 years after his assassination in Memphis on April 4, 1968, would King was born and raised. Specifhave seemed unlikely at that time— ically, he was born there because to both his critics and his supporters. his parents refused to accept the But the growing reverence for segregated and substandard hospital Martin Luther King Jr, as an iconic facilities available to Black people, so

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UNSEEN-HISTORIES—UNSPLASH

even the place of his birth was an act of resistance. Dr King’s father visited Germany in the early 1930s, both visiting historical places of the Reformation and witnessing firsthand the beginnings of the rise of Nazism, and was so affected by the experience that he changed his name and that of his then-five-yearold son to “Martin Luther”.

About 20 years later, in Montgomery, Alabama, Dr King would start a new reformation. As a newly arrived young pastor, he was elected as leader of the Montgomery Improvement Association, which was primarily a coalition of Black churches who were supporting a boycott of the city’s bus system in protest against the laws and practices of racial segregation. There were pragmatic reasons for the churches’ leadership in this protest movement: the churches were the natural social and organising networks for the Black community, and the clergymen were often the only members of the community who were not employed by white people and so were not risking their employment by speaking up on these issues. But the Black churches also provided the theological insights and the spiritual inspiration that would be the foundation for the Civil Rights Movement. It was a religious movement as much as it was social and political. The many religious leaders—black and white, priests and rabbis, pastors and students—who joined various MARCH 2022 • SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU

41

of the protests was evidence of this.

And this was as true for Dr King personally as it was for the movement as a whole. His prominence as a young leader caused him to become the target of those opposing the boycott action. This peaked at about midnight, in early 1956, when he received an anonymous phone call threatening—with additional racial epithets and expletives—that “if you aren’t out of this town within three days, we’re going to blow your brains out, and blow up your house”.1 Understandably, Dr King was upset after receiving this call and, while his young family slept, he sat in their kitchen wondering what he should do next. He battled with his fear and the

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to larger issues of racism, poverty and militarism across the United States and in the world beyond. He recognised that these campaigns were more difficult because the legal standing of their claims were not as clear. Instead of focusing narrowly on the civil and constitutional rights that were somewhat recognised in the existing laws of the United States, he reflected, “We are entering the area of human rights.”2 Awarded as the then-youngestever recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize in 1964, Dr King embraced a broader view of the work for justice in the world. His later campaigns and particularly the last book that he wrote—Where Do We Go From Here?—included increasing engagement with issues of economic justice, anti-militarism, and community, national and international wellbeing.

But this was to be an incomplete work. It is easy to forget that he was killed at just 39 years of age. With his wife Coretta, his tomb is part of the National Historical Park on the block between the house in which he was born and the church in which he preached. The visitor centre continues to tell the story, to celebrate the achievements of the Civil Rights Movement—how things have changed—and to urge visitors to the ongoing work—recognising how, in many ways, racial injustices and inequities have not disappeared.

Dr King saw that the achievements of the Civil Rights Movement would need to be defended and the

UNSEEN-HISTORIES—UNSPLASH

conflict between what he saw as his duty to the cause in which he had become involved and his duty to his family. In Dr King’s own words: “And I discovered then that religion had to become real to me, and I had to know God for myself. . . . And it seemed to me at that moment that I could hear an inner voice saying to me, ‘Martin Luther, stand up for righteousness. Stand up for justice.

Stand up for truth. And lo I will be with you, even unto the end of the world.’”

Dr King found great strength from this experience: “Almost at once my fears began to go. My uncertainty disappeared.” Three days later, his house was bombed and a crowd gathered, wanting to respond with violence. But speaking from this foundation of faith in the presence of God, he urged the crowd to continue to protest with non-violence.

Much of what we know as the Civil Rights Movement and of the protests that marked it were focused on desegregation and voting rights for Black people in the American South. These seemed to climax in the March on Washington, the signing of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Selma to Montgomery marches in March 1965, which caught national and international attention.

But, writing in 1967, Dr King noted a significant shift in the nature of his ongoing work. His focus was turning

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yet to pay a significant price to eradicate it”.4 This makes Dr King’s resounding voice all the more important to hear again. And the foundations of his life, faith and prophetic call too important to forget.

1 Story adapted from and quotes taken from David Garrow, Bearing the Cross: Martin Luther King, Jr. and The Southern Leadership Conference, Vintage, 1986, pages 57–8.

2 Martin Luther King, Jr. (1968), Where Do We Go From Here: Chaos or Community? Beacon Press, 2010, page 138.

3 Where Do We Go From Here, pages 11–12.

4 Where Do We Go From Here, page 12.

UNSEEN-HISTORIES—UNSPLASH

Nathan Brown is a book editor at Signs Publishing Company. He is based in Warburton, Victoria.

JOSHBLAKE—GETTY IMAGES

work of justice would be perennial.

He recognised the persistence of “unregenerate segregationists who have declared that democracy is not worth having if it involves equality”, instead seeking the “total reversal of all reforms, with reestablishment of naked oppression and if need be a native form of facism”3.

The words carved in stone at the Martin Luther King Jr Memorial remain inspiring, which is why many of them become social media posts in response to news stories from time to time. But for most of us, we live with the tension Dr King identified: “uneasy with injustice but unwilling

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ELL BEI NG

REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS:

THE SECRET

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OF LASTING

relationships

BY GENIA RUSCU

MARCH 2022 • SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU

EVERTON-VILA—UNSPLASH

Research shows that holding realistic expectations can make or break a relationship. Becoming a good enough couple might be just what the doctor ordered.

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he expectations couples place on their relationship define how they relate to each other and influence marital satisfaction. We expect everything to be done to a superlative degree by our life partner.

Compared to 100 years ago, many areas of society have developed unreasonable expectations. There is a chronic romanticisation of love—we want our partner to be our lover, best friend, therapist and so on. We want them to help us become our best, turning marriage into an advanced personal development class.

couples, give us concrete examples of: • practical concerns transposed into decisions and daily habits: roles in the household, relationships with in-laws, religious beliefs, leisure, conflict resolution, budget management, etc; • harmonisation of extremes for a balanced couple life: stability vs change, dependence vs autonomy, intentionality vs spontaneity, etc; • meeting the needs of affection, belonging, control, personal development and affiliation with moral principles and values.

“I wish that . . .”

unrealistic expectations

At a theoretical level, expectations start to form in the stage preceding a relationship, when we build the image of our ideal future partner (“I wish my husband or wife were . . .”). This image is often one which has higher standards than we would consider reasonable for a strong relationship with a romantic partner.

Later, expectations take the form of specific requirements or relationship rules (“To make me happy you have to . . .”), stemming from the three major sources of learning: the family of origin, society and personal experience. All three teach us what to ask for and what to offer in a marriage. If society regulates aspects related to “packaging” (age of marriage, rights, legal obligations and so on), family exposes us to personal attitudes and beliefs about marriage and intimacy.

Our parents, and other reference 48

SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU • MARCH 2022

Closely related to ideas, experiences and feelings, expectations play an essential role in a couple’s relationship, so it is important that they are realistic.

It is unrealistic to demand the healing of emotional wounds, spiritual enlightenment or self-perfection from our marriage.

Eli Finkel, a psychologist at Northwestern University in Illinois, US, encourages couples to recalibrate their marital expectations in terms of existential needs and to outsource certain roles assumed in the couple to other close members of the social network. He states that “there’s no shame at all in thinking of ways that you can ask less”.

Finkel’s recommendations are supported by the results of a study conducted at Northwestern by Elaine Cheung, which showed that people who are emotionally charged from

the illusion of perfection

Another source of unrealistic expectations is the constant exposure to the online environment. Here, an invasion of perfection is let in, and it distorts our image of happiness.

The embellished feelings captured on social networks create the illusion of perfection which, once confronted with reality, gives rise to comparisons and, implicitly, frustrations.

According to a 2013 study, 45 per cent of young people (18–29 years old) admit that what they see on social networks affects their romantic relationships.

To avoid suffering caused by inordinately high standards, some psychologists recommend lowering expectations. Others say that higher standards actually protect us from disappointment. Among them is Donald Baucom, a professor of psychology at the University

of North Carolina, who suggest the only effective mechanism in the dynamics of expectation is the following principle: “People get what they expect.”

If we find ourselves frozen in fear of a potential refusal, convinced by our partner’s unavailability or driven by low self-esteem, we inhibit our desires. This forced self-censorship will not reward us with a lasting and flourishing relationship, but with the burden of a misinterpreted compromise and with many subsequent grievances. Long-term relationships cannot last with a form of resentment or inadequacy at their core.

Baucom concludes that only by really knowing our needs can we address appropriate “requests” to our partner, and this is a rule that works the other way around as well.

Acknowledging one’s acute need for affection causes the husband, for example, to ask his wife for more attention

MONKEYBUISNESSIMAGES—GETTY IMAGES

multiple sources have a better quality of life than those who make their partner responsible for the full range of feelings and emotions necessary for mental comfort.

We must not, therefore, assign to our partner the role of “jack of all trades”, the one solely responsible for our (permanent) wellbeing, or become emotionally dependent on them. Unmet expectations can be damaging, but in a healthy relationship certain expectations can be assigned to others.

and to reject any opposing treatment.

A healthy partnership is one where both partners meet the other’s expectations (where appropriate).

the essential criteria

High standards are justified only if they have a basis in reality and meet three essential criteria: • Appropriateness: This involves setting expectations in accordance with: a. the stage of the relationship (we cannot expect to make plans for the honeymoon after a single date); b. the needs and resources of the partner (we cannot want to go for a hike every day if our partner does not have the time); c. the relevant objective factors.

• Flexibility: This involves adapting expectations to new changes, positive or negative, with an emphasis on patience, openness and attention to the needs of the other (professional changes, health 50

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problems, personal transformations, the birth of children and so on).

• Accountability: This refers to the assertive communication of expectations, in a framework that denotes diplomacy in demanding that the other keeps their commitments.

The three essential criteria (“Are my expectations appropriate, flexible, reasonable?”) help us remain anchored in reality, but also filter the patterns taken from our own environment of growth and development. The model of our parents (or primary caregivers) is not always a beneficial one that inspires reasonable expectations, based on good self-knowledge and a correct understanding of the other’s needs. Here is where the need for self-regulation and the conscious choice to detach ourselves from the pattern make their appearance, interrupting the series of toxic habits that can generate some inappropriate expectations, including: • lack of empathy and emotional unavailability = “I expect you to cope

good enough relationships

Perhaps high expectations, when sacrificed on the altar of reason through necessary compromises, do not give rise to ideal marriages (an unattainable standard), but maintain what specialists consider to be “good enough relationships”. Despite the not-very-alluring name, good enough relationships are distinguished by the fact that they can meet the following needs: • to be treated with gentleness, compassion, respect • to receive love and affection • to not be humiliated, neglected or abused • to not be deceived • to interact intimately, deeply • to be valued.

Even if partners still quarrel, those involved in such relationships know which battles to choose­—an extremely useful skill considering that “when choosing a long-term partner . . . you will inevitably be choosing a particular set of unsolvable problems” (Dr Dan Wile, author and couples therapist).

Statistically, 70 per cent of quarrels come from an inability to accept

our partner’s mistakes. Taking into account the fact that most conflicts have recurring themes, at the end of the day what matters is how we deal with problems, and not how many of them we manage to cross off the list. How we view our partner is important.

Although they do not have the secret of full harmony, the protagonists of “good enough” relationships have a high degree of marital satisfaction, being willing to accept the imperfections of the other and to shape their expectations according to the situation. Being able to cultivate good expectations helps them fight vulnerabilities and start a family based on: • authentic friendship • mutual trust • constructively managed conflicts • making compromises that work • a satisfying sex life • the ability to apologise and tend to each other’s wounds • accepting differences • sharing a system of similar values, beliefs, habits and aspirations.

Expectations can weigh heavily on a couple—even decide their fate.

Therefore, their role should not be underestimated, but understood.

Want to learn more about what is love, communication and conflict management? Check out the free course Relationships at <hopechannel.com/au/learn/ relationships>.

Genia Ruscu is a writer from Romania. She has a masters degree in social work, which is her full-time profession.

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alone in difficult situations”; • manipulation or blackmail as a method of resolving conflicts = “I expect you to give in, otherwise I won’t talk to you anymore”; • prioritising according to the needs of a single partner = “I expect you to always sacrifice your free time, so that I can solve my problems.”

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KAROLINA GRABOWSKA, PHOTOMIX COMPANY, ALEXANDER ISREB, MAKSIM GONCHARENOK, NEGATIVE SPACE—PEXELS

CRYPTO: CHANGING THE WAY WE PAY

BUYING THE CONSTITUTION 20,000 cryptocurrency users unsuccessfully attempted to buy an original copy of the US constitution, losing out to billionaire Ken Griffin.

Organised by online platform "ConstitutionDAO", users can buy tokens and make collective decisions on which items to bid for in auctions.

—Gizmodo

HACKED Google has declared 86 per cent of recently compromised accounts were used for cryptocurrency mining—where large-scale computing power is used to solve complex maths problems and receive a portion of bitcoin as a reward. The hackers are taking advantage of Google's cloud storage space—CNBC, Investopedia

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FOR THE WEALTHY Dogecoin creator Jackson Palmer has spoken out against cryptocurrencies—despite creating his own mock version in 2013. "[It is] controlled by a powerful cartel of wealthy figures," he wrote on Twitter. He added that crypto trade is being hijacked by "scammers and opportunists".—Market Watch

CALCULATING NUMBERS It's been known for a while that human eyes can detect more than just light, but new research has found eyes can detect the quantity of items in a perceived space. This subconscious response has also been observed in animals.

—University of Sydney

A NEW ERA OF CAMERAS THE SIZE OF A GRAIN OF SAND Computer scientists have created "metasurface" technology to build a microscopic camera system capable of sharper photos than many compact cameras. Utilising "Neural Nano-Optics", the camera is intended for small robotics and applications and exploration of the human body. While small cameras of this size often compromise image quality, the yet-unnamed camera uses software to immediately digitally sharpen and improve photo quality.—Science Alert ALWAYS WATCHING . . .

Qualcomm, the company behind most Android smartphone processors, has introduced a new feature with its Snapdragon 8 Gen 1 processor which will allow phone cameras to be constantly turned on and scanning the user's face. Justified as allowing the phone to instantly unlock when it sees the user's face and lock when it doesn't, privacy advocates have expressed concern that the technology will be misused.

Most smartphones already contain microphones that are always switched on.—The Verge TOILET SURVEILLANCE An IKEA employee in Peterborough, England, noticed a surveillance camera in the ceiling while using the company's warehouse toilet. An investigation found multiple cameras were installed in both the men's and women's toilets by the company and were connected by network cables. IKEA have since removed the cameras and stated they were installed there to prevent injury and "maintain a high level of safety on-site".—The Register

MAGNETIC SENSE It's common knowledge that birds fly according to the Earth's magnetic field, but recent studies suggest that it's due to the Crytopchrome 4 protein found in the bird's eye. The protein helps birds to absorb light and go through photochemistry allowing it to see magnetic fields.—The Scientist

RED LIGHT SLOWS DECLINE Scientists have discovered that shining red or infrared light into an eye for a few minutes can slightly help with declining eyesight. The method is thought to boost the mitochondria inside eye cells, and a small test in 24 people found it to improve their colour vision for a few days.—NewScientist MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES

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Maid is the latest mini-series from Netflix to tackle some heavy topics around family violence and alcoholism. Jarrod Stackelroth examines why it's so successful.

SERIES PUTS SPOTLIGHT ON FAMILY VIOLENCE MARCH 2022 • SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU

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M

aid continues the tradition of made-for-television series that explore a story with depth and detail in a way that a feature film cannot. Rather than being action packed from start to finish, each episode in Maid has a story arc that keeps you on the edge of your seat while simultaneously building the greater narrative.

Maid is inspired by the book Maid: Hard Work, Low Pay, and a Mother’s Will to Survive—a memoir written by single mother Stephanie Land. While not a factual retelling of the book, Land’s memoir of life as a single mum struggling to make ends meet while living below the poverty line serves as inspiration for much of the show’s plot.

Alex (masterfully played by Margaret Qualley) is the protagonist of the series, an intelligent, empathetic mother of three-year-old Maddy (Rylea Nevaeh Whittet). She was

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accepted into college but didn’t go, putting her life and dreams on hold for her daughter and her relationship with Sean (Nick Robinson), a bartender. Sean has a chronic drinking problem and in a confronting opening scene we see Alex taking Maddy and fleeing into the night. This is only the start of Alex’s problems as Maid takes an in-depth look at some of the relationships and circumstances that have led her to this point and some of the challenges she must overcome to find safety and security—but more than that, finding fulfilment for herself and her daughter. I’ll avoid going into any more details to avoid spoilers, but be warned that there is a high chance you may get emotionally invested in the characters, finding yourself frustrated, cheering, angry or overcome with emotion.

Maid has a “show don’t tell” attitude. It’s not preachy. It navigates difficult scenarios with tact and

grace. Qualley has expressive eyes and communicates so much through her facial expressions.

The cast is perfectly chosen, perhaps in part due to the fact that Qualley’s real-life mother, actor Andie MacDowell, plays her onscreen mother Paula. It also helps that the cast relate to the script. Paula’s unstable relationship with Alex is on point, something MacDowell attributes to personal experience. “I grew up with so much mental instability, it’s something I understand on a really deep, deep level,” MacDowell shared in an interview.

As a viewer you feel uncomfortable as the script, scenes, scenarios and the performances combine to emulate the feelings of anxiety, instability, heartache and helplessness over the characters’ experiences. Domestic violence (DV); homelessness; navigating court systems; neglect; how easy it is to relapse into toxic relationships; generational trauma passed down through the family— Maid tackles these complex problems with courage and compassion.

I should warn you though, Maid is heavy. It may be triggering for some people who have dealt with any of the situations depicted or even issues that are related, such as mental health.

domestic violence

Not all domestic or family violence is black eyes or broken limbs.

This mini-series tackles many of the misconceptions that people have

about family violence. Even Alex has to learn that what is happening to her is classified as abuse.

In an interview, Christian relationship counsellor and Avondale University lecturer Paul Bogacs explained it this way: “Domestic violence or domestic abuse doesn’t necessarily mean being hit or being a victim of physical violence. We now talk about different forms of DV; we talk about financial abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, spiritual abuse—all as different forms of DV, with the key underlying issue being control.”

That element of control is really at the centre of all violence and this theme is masterfully explored in Maid as different forms of control and abuse are portrayed.

“To feel some power, to feel that you have some kind of control over something—even if it’s what my wife [or intimate partner] does or doesn’t do. That is domestic violence,” continues Bogacs. “Now, we see [domestic violence] on a spectrum, because power and control are issues in all relationships. What I look at as a couples’ therapist is how much fear is there?”

An important point the series makes is that it is necessary to leave an abusive situation, no matter how hard or inconvenient that may be.

mental illness

Another theme explored by the series is mental illness. A number of characters have obvious mental MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES.ORG.AU

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health problems. Maid explores the link between mental illness, institutions, homelessness and how they contribute to poor decision-making or lack of family support in DV situations.

An important lesson echoed in Maid—to a greater or lesser extent by most of the characters—is that no-one is purely evil or good but that their actions are often a mixture of the two. People are complex.

This understanding is compatible with the Christian worldview. The Bible teaches that all “have sinned and fallen short” (Romans 3:23), but that all humans are made in the very image of God (Genesis 1:27). This tension means we must see people as infinitely valuable and not ever try to exert control or wield power over them—while understanding that in this broken world, people do bad things and good things, but don’t have to be defined by them. There

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is power to choose and power to change. But Maid shows that change has to happen by the choice of an individual. We cannot change others and we cannot change for others; we can only change ourselves.

While Maid may not be for everyone, it is certainly an important cultural artifact that explores the gritty reality of human experience and tackles some heavy and pervasive issues with grace, depth and insight.

Jarrod Stackelroth is the editor of Signs of the Times Australia and Adventist Record. He loves looking at all the latest and greatest in media and culture through a religious lens—that is, when he’s not busy editing the next issue of the magazine.

Please note that a review of a show does not constitute an endorsement by Signs of the Times Australia. Maid is rated MA15+ for strong themes and strong coarse language.

positively different From family LIFE to physical HEALTH, sacred MUSIC to vibrant SPIRITUALITY, Faith FM programs will brighten your day and guide you on the way.

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R E CI P E

PORTION CONTROL FOR A

HEALTHY WEIGHT ELLA OLSSON—GETTY IMAGES

The pandemic has upended many aspects of our lives—and our diets and waistlines have not been immune. But there’s an easy way to manage healthy portions and it’s as simple as getting a bit hands-on.

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TIME TO TAKE CONTROL Watching portion sizes is important for weight management and essential for weight loss.

Portion control simply means working out just how much food you should be putting on your plate. It doesn’t mean saying no to any food group or keeping track of points.

Looking at portions is a simple way to manage your weight—certainly better than counting calories. There’s no need to overfocus on measuring down to the gram. It’s more about finding a healthy way to load up your plate with nutritious foods you love, and that love you back. An easy way to get your portion sizes right is using your palms and fists.

GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU . . .

Pretty much every part of your hand can work when it comes to calculating portion size.

A fist—represents about ½­—1 cup, which is the perfect portion size when it comes to fruit, wholegrains, pasta or rice. So, what about spuds? For starchy veggies, a fist or half a medium potato is a portion.

Two handfuls—gives you a great guide to add plenty of fresh salad or non-starchy veggies.

Always load your plate with these.

A cupped hand—the ideal 30g snack size for nuts, dried fruit or trail mix. It’s also a portion of soft cheese, such as cottage or ricotta cheeses.

ILLUSTRATED BY PHIL MCKAY

Two cupped hands—perfect for legumes like chickpeas, beans and lentils. It’s around 150g.

A palm—it’s the size to aim for when serving up plant proteins like tofu and tempeh, as well as meat alternatives (100-150g).

Fingers—yes even your thumb and fingers can help you measure. A thumb is about two tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil and your fingertip is a teaspoon for other oils and spread.

Always go for more extra virgin olive oil as the research shows big benefits for this healthy plant-based oil, including better brain health and reduced risk of stroke and type 2 diabetes.

EXTRA TIPS ABOUT PORTION CONTROL Using a small plate—It’s all mind over matter.

A standard size portion will look small on a larger plate, making you feel less satisfied. A smaller plate will make your meal look more generous.

Go big on veggies—Fill half your plate with colourful, non-starchy veggies, such as dark, leafy greens, green beans, broccoli, mushrooms and other salad veggies.

Say no to seconds—Put those leftovers in the fridge or freezer before you sit down to eat.

That will reduce the temptation to go back for seconds.

The 20-minute rule—Eat slowly so you have the chance to feel full. Eating slower is good for us because it takes time for mechanical and hormonal signals to reach the brain from the stomach to tell us we’re full.

A sweet treat—For those who crave a sweet treat after a meal, cut up fresh fruit before you sit down to eat, so you have something healthy ready to go.

Recipe courtesy of Sanitarium Health Food Company. Visit sanitarium.com.au or sanitarium.co.nz and subscribe to Recipe of the Week for a delicious plant-powered recipe in your inbox each week.

MARCH 2022 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES.ORG.AU

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How closely have you been reading? Each keyword in this puzzle is also contained within this edition of Signs of the Times.

Happy digging!

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Hint: 9 Across

EDUCATION.COM

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ACROSS 3 1000 years 4 Material made of hardened clay 5 To obsess over something 6 When someone is excluded from a group or society 9 Family of stout-bodied birds with short necks 11 Adjusting the intensity of colours in a photo 13 Behaving impulsively 14 Archaeological site with many caves in Israel's West Bank DOWN 1 Location of famous Abraham Lincoln speech in 1863 2 A person's main occupation 7 A measure of how much work one is able to accomplish 8 Hebrew phrase meaning "stone of help" 10 Belief in maintaining a strong army 12 A person responsible for coordinating staff in an organisation

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SOLUTIONS AVAILABLE ONLINE SIGNSOFTHETIMES.ORG.AU OCTOBER 2021 • SIGNS OF THE TIMES

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Signs of the Times radio is being enjoyed all across Australia and New Zealand on Faith FM and online. The Signs of the Times team discuss the latest in current world events, faith and wellbeing with experts and guests. Ready to feel informed and inspired?