Talk Centered Around Sexuality and Disabled Identity

VITTORIA SOCOLOF ‘25 (SHE/HER) STAFF WRITER

Gabe Adams-Wheatley was born with no arms or legs. He was put up for adoption in Brazil at nine months old, and was adopted by a Mormon American family with 13 children. On Feb. 23, the now social media influencer and advocate for the disabled community delivered a talk at Davidson.

Adams-Wheatley, who identifies as nonbinary and uses he/him pronouns, began discussing his childhood, and the obstacles he faced on his journey to independence. Both Adams-Wheatley’s adoptive parents and siblings pushed him to learn to walk on his own and enjoy activities such as swimming and dancing.

While Adams-Wheatley had a close relationship with his parents, his sexuality caused division between them. At age nineteen, he came out as gay. Although it took time, he was able to maintain his relationship with his parents.

After speaking about his upbringing and family life, Adams-Wheatley went on to discuss his entrance on to social media. His platoform stemmed from his work as a motivational speaker post high school, and he posted his first TikTok in 2019.

Adams-Wheatley persues advocacy through social media, showing the numerous ways he can use makeup products. He posts short video clips and edits to his TikTok and Instagram reels. In addition, he often reposts videos of him performing at dance competitions.

“It’s given me so many opportunities to do things I’d never thought I’d do,” he said.

In 2019, Adams-Wheatley received the opportunity to model at NY Fashion Week, where he met Sarah Todd Hammer ‘24 for the first time. They both walked as models wearing accessible clothing with modifications such as magnets replacing buttons and zippers.

Like Adams-Wheatley, Hammer uses social media as an outlet. She began posting regularly in highschool, and found a community among other influencers.

“Even though disabled people are the largest minority in the world, it feels like such a closeknit community because I know so many names out there through connecting through social media,” Hammer said.

As President of the Davidson Disability Alliance (DDA), Hammer, who was originally paralyzed from the neck down but regained the ability to walk, has been attempting to revamp the club to represent disability as a culture and an identity. This led to her extending an invitation to Adams-Wheatly to come and speak at Davidson.

“One reason we wanted Gabe to come was to push disability as an identity,” Hammer said.

“The Center for Diversity and Inclusion (CDI) at Davidson does not acknowledge disability as an identity…all of that responsibility is pushed back to the [Academic Access and] Disability [Resources] Office (AADR) in the library.”

The AADR works with the college to ensure that academic resources are accessible to all students, and provides accomidations to students with disabilities. This is in contrast to the CDI, who engages the entire community in diversity equity and inclusion efforts, but specifically targets students of color, LGBTQ+ students, first-generation students and undocumented students.

According to Gabriella Morreale ‘23, outreach coordinator for the DDA, AdamsWheatley could speak to the intersectionality between disabilities and other identifiers as he is a disabled, gay, person of color.

“He is not only limited by his disability but also by his identity,” Morreale said.

Morrealle has hearing loss, a disability that is not always apparent upon first glance.

“With visible disabilities people might first jump on what you can’t do…People see my personality and what I’m able to do first, versus what I’m not able to do,” Morrealle said.

This is another aspect that adds to AdamsWheatley’s identity as well. His disability is visible and may often be the first thing people notice when they see him.

“It’s something interesting about Gabe, everyone stares at him all the time and he’s used to that,” Hammer said.

Hammer, also explained that it is difficult for her to ask for help at times because she considers her own disability to not necessarily be visible.

“Sometimes I feel awkward asking for help because people might not know why,” she said.

For Hammer, one would have to look closely to see the paralysis in her arms and hands. This is another motivating factor for Hammer in terms of bringing awareness to the disabled community.

While Adams-Wheatley had support growing up from his family, he faced hardships dealing with online hate from the media and bullying in school. He revealed that one of his tactics for regaining confidence is to read positive quotes, one of his favorites being: “Sometimes in life people will pout oil on us to watch us die, and other times they will pour water to watch us grow.”