CNY 55+ Issue 79 Feb March 2019

Cabin Fever? Try One of CNY’s Many Breweries

55 PLUS

Issue 79 – February-March 2019

For Active Adults in the Central New York Area

NEW SISTER DNA testing helps local woman discover a half-sister she never knew she had

DAVE EICHORN Forget the weather.

Meteorologist now focuses on woodworking

REBECCA PROCTOR The creative brain behind Aurora-based Mackenzie-Childs talks about life, career and what keeps her going

free please share

‘Baby, It’s (Still) Cold Outside’ • The Lyrics Controversy

Nationally Recognized Stroke Care.

Say “Take Me to Crouse.”

As one of just 10 hospitals in New York State to have earned Comprehensive Stroke Center certification, Crouse Health is proud to provide the full range of stroke care services.

Minutes Matter Comprehensive stroke centers are the best-equipped medical centers in a geographical area that can treat any kind of stroke or stroke complication.

At Crouse, receiving fast stroke diagnosis and treatment starts even before patients arrive at the Emergency Room. Once on the scene, our Emergency Medical Services partners start communicating with our ER and stroke teams, providing information vital for immediate treatment.

Working together, we’re consistently meeting — and exceeding — aggressive door-totreatment times that surpass the U.S. average. Crouse provides options for post-stroke rehabilitation, as well as continuing education to patients, our EMS partners and the community about the risks factors and signs of stroke.

Advanced Stroke Rescue Crouse is the only hospital in the region equipped with two hybrid operating room suites, allowing our multidisciplinary stroke team to provide the most advanced endovascular stroke rescue capabilities 24/7.

Exceeding Stroke Treatment Standards Median Time (minutes)

37

2016

38.5

2017 2018

35

YTD

Source: AHA/ASA Get With the Guidelines

If tPA is given within three hours of symptoms, the effects of stroke decrease significantly. Crouse has earned the American Heart/Stroke Association’s Target: Stroke Honor Roll Elite Plus recognition for meeting — and exceeding — AHA guidelines for giving tPA within 45 minutes.

Community Partner KNOW YOUR STROKE SIGNS

F. A. S. T.

FACE DROOPING

ARM WEAKNESS

SPEECH DIFFICULTY

TIME TO CALL 911

S T R O K E ? C A L L 911. crouse.org/stroke

As a New York State-designated Primary Stroke Center since 2007, we’ve worked to raise awareness in our community about the warning signs of stroke.

With our designation as a DNV Comprehensive Stroke Center and home to the region’s newest ER, Crouse Health continues to deliver superior stroke care to Central New York patients.

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February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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CONTENTS

Cabin Fever? Try One of CNY’s Many Breweries

55

Februrary / March 2019

PLUS

Issue 79 – February-March 2019

For Active Adults in the Central New York Area

NEW SISTER DNA testing helps local woman discover a half-sister she never knew she had

55 PLUS

DAVE EICHORN Forget the weather.

Meteorologist now focuses on woodworking

REBECCA PROCTOR The creative brain behind Aurora-based Mackenzie-Childs talks about life, career and what keeps her going

free

cny55.com

please share

‘Baby, It’s (Still) Cold Outside’ • The Lyrics Controversy

16

24

Savvy Senior 6 12 BREWERIES Gardening 8

• Cabin Fever? Hit a local brewery. We have from which to choose

Dining Out 10 16 MOVIES My Turn 18 • Running the show at Manlius Art Aging 31 Golden Years 41 Life After 55 44 Druger’s Zoo 46 LAST PAGE Sen. John DeFrancisco, 72 — Getting ready for a new phase of his life — after 41 years in politics 4

55 PLUS - February / March 2019

55 PLUS 38

42

26 COVER • Rebecca Proctor: The creative force behind Mackenzie-Childs

32 BENEFITS

Cinema as theater turns 100

• Retirees getting a fatter Social Security paycheck

20 SECOND ACT

34 READING

• Meteorologist Dave Eichorn used to forecast the weather at WSYR NewsChannel 9; now he is all about wood working

36 CLEANING

22 DOWNSIZING • Moving from house to house and getting rid of old possessions, not an easy task

24 GENETICS • DNA testing helps local woman to discover a half-sister she never knew she had

• CNY Reads One Book members reading “Born a Crime” by Trevor Noah • Decluttering can be a challenge for those at middle age and beyond

38 BOOKS • A book that focuses on the Lives of African-Americans from Upstate who fought in the Civil War

42 SOCCER • Soccer legend Dean Foti gives back to the sport he cherishes

LIFE SAVING SYNERGY Experience world-class treatment at the St. Joseph’s Health Cardiovascular Institute, as we bring together nationally acclaimed specialists from all facets of cardiovascular medicine to provide the widest range of options in the region. Our commitment to constant self-improvement is strong.

And with our ever-growing list of groundbreaking services including our Minimally Invasive Cardiac Surgery Program, patients recover faster and more safely, because to us...

EVERY BEAT MATTERS.

A H I G H E R L E V E L O F C A R E | visit everybeatmatterssjh.org © 2019 St. Joseph’s Health. © 2019 Trinity Health. All rights reserved.

February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

5

savvy senior

By Jim Miller

T

Help Caring for an Aging Parent

aking care of an aging parent over a period of time — especially when juggling work and other family obligations — can be physically and mentally exhausting. But help and resources are available.

To help you determine and prioritize the kinds of help you need, a good first step is to make a list of everything you do as a caregiver, big and small. Note the amount of time each one takes every day, week or month. Identify the times when you need help the most and which tasks others might be able to do for you, like making lunch for your mother when you’re at work. Then list the types of care needed, such as simple companionship or doing active chores, like food shopping. Once you determine this, here are some tips and places you can reach out to for help.

Caregiving Help — If you have siblings or other loved ones close by, schedule a family meeting in person or by phone, to discuss specific tasks they could provide. See if friends, neighbors or faith group members could help too.

You should also investigate resources in your mom’s town. Many communities offer a range of free or subsidized services that help seniors and caregivers with basic needs such as home delivered meals, transportation, senior companion services and respite services, which offers shortterm care so you can take an occasional break. Call the county Office of Aging (call 800-677-1116 for contact information) for referrals to services available in your community, or for respite services see ARCHrespite. org/respitelocator.

Financial Aids — If you’re handling your mom’s financial chores, make things easier by arranging for direct

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55 PLUS - February / March 2019

deposit for her income sources, and set up automatic payments for her utilities and other routine bills. You may also want to set up your mom’s online banking service, so you can pay bills and monitor her account anytime. Or, if you need help, hire a daily money manager (AADMM.com) to do it for you. They charge between $25 and $100 per hour. BenefitsCheckup.org is another excellent resource to look for financial assistance programs that may help your mom, particularly if she’s lower-income.

Technology Assistance — To help you keep tabs on your mom when you are away, there are affordable technologies that can help.

For example, there are medical alert systems (like Bay Alarm Medical, BayAlarmMedical.com), which provide a wearable “help button” that would allow your mom to call for help anytime she needed it.

Or, you could install a video-monitoring camera (like Lighthouse Al, Light.house/elderly-care) that lets you check in on her anytime via your smartphone or computer. These cameras have built-in motion and sound detection that will let you know when something is detected, and two-way audio that will let you talk and listen to her. There are even websites (like LotsaHelpingHands.com) that can help you more easily coordinate care with other family members.

Insurance Questions? — If you have questions about Medicare, Medicaid or long-term care, the Health Insurance Assistance Program (SHIP) offers free counseling and advice on these issues. Call 877-839-2675 or visit ShiptaCenter.org to locate a nearby counselor. You can also get help through the Medicare Rights Center, which staffs a helpline at 800-3334114.

55PLUS cny55.com

Editor and Publisher Wagner Dotto

Associate Editor Lou Sorendo

Writers

Deborah J. Sergeant Mary Beth Roach, Cheryl Costa Christopher Malone, Aaron Gifford Margaret McCormick, Carol Radin

Columnists

Bruce Frassinelli Marilyn Pinsky, Harold Miller Jim Sollecito, Marvin Druger Michele Reed, Sandra Scott .

Advertising

Amy Gagliano Cassandra Lawson

Office Assistant Kimberley Tyler

Design

Dylon Clew-Thomas

Cover Photo

Chuck Wainwright 55 PLUS –A Magazine for Active Adults in Central New York is published six times a year by Local News, Inc., which also publishes In Good Health–CNY’s Healthcare Newspaper.

Published at 185 E. Seneca St. PO Box 276 Oswego, NY 13126.

Subscription: $21 a year; $35 for two years © 2019 by 55 PLUS – A Magazine for Active Adults in Upstate New York.

No material may be reproduced in whole or in part from this publication without the express written permission of the publisher.

Third class postage paid at Syracuse, NY. Permit Number: 3071

How to Reach Us P.O. Box 276 Oswego, NY 13126 Phone: 315-342-1182 Fax: 315-342-7776 Email: editor@CNY55.com Editor@cnyhealth.com

For Jack it’s personal!

“She and I were one.

What they did for her, they did for me.”

UPSTATE LEGACIES

The appreciation is evident in Jack Gorham’s voice when he talks about the way Upstate University Hospital physicians, nurses, physician assistants and staff treated his wife Colleen throughout her 17-year journey with cancer.

Have you or your family experienced Upstate’s heart and

hope?

Jack wants to help maintain this level of care and compassion for future cancer patients. That is why he has remembered the Upstate Foundation in his will. That is his heart and hope.

Understanding firsthand how charitable gifts impact the lives of others can change the lives of those who give and those who receive.

Your gifts have an immediate impact on the programs and services you care most deeply about. Thoughtful gift planning can help to minimize costs and maximize future impact of those gifts, helping to ensure your personal legacy continues long into the future.

Would you like to learn more about high-impact, low-cost Legacy Gift opportunities that can help you meet your personal and philanthropic goals? For free and confidential information contact, or have your professional advisor contact, our planned giving professionals at 315-464-6490 or email HamiltoL@upstate.edu.

Impacting patient care, education, research, and community health and well-being through charitable giving.

www.UpstateFoundation.org February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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gardening

By Jim Sollecito

Apple of My Eye

M

An apple a day is a win-win situation

y dog and I enjoyed a brisk November walk at Three Rivers Wildlife Management Area in Lysander on one of those days when the air just feels right.

I was taking in the various plants showing off their seasonally appropriate personalities when my attention was drawn to something red flashing across the field.

I needed to see what this stoplight color was all about. From a distance, it appeared to be more than just the last vestiges of the previous growing season. As I got closer I saw it was a combination of natural and man-made fibers.

Some hunter lost his bandana on a lovely crabapple that bore a bumper crop of crimson fruits contrasting boldly with the yellowing foliage. I wondered if someone picking and eating these fruits paused to clean the persistent autumn raindrops from their glasses.

Instead of stuffing their kerchief deep enough into a pocket, was it lost in the breeze?

The answer, my friend, was blowing in the wind.

That got me thinking about apples.

I know the only difference between an apple and crabapple is the size of the fruit.

Some crabapples are actually tastier than some bland apples. For example, there are more than 55 varieties of Red Delicious. Considered delicious in 1880, their mealy texture and thick skins have lost favor to recent introductions.

They traveled well from Washington state and were the No. 1 selling apple for over 50 years; but not for much longer. Improved, superior varieties that don’t need nearly as many sprays and produce tastier fruit are readily available now. Gold Rush happens to be my personal favorite and I grow a lot of these on our farm.

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A bandana lost on a crabapple tree in Lysander.

Trading with hard cider Until the 19th century, apples were drunk, not eaten. Cider was a popular beverage since water was often unfit to drink. Hard cider could be the only alcohol available in rural areas.

In fact, farm workers might be paid in part with hard cider. Settlers could claim land by clearing five acres, planting 30 various apple trees and living on the land for five years.

Some of those trees might have come from the early nurseryman Johnny Appleseed.

Some of the many varieties of the genus Malus growing wild in our woods are very possibly descendants of those early apple trees. Since they were propagated from seed, the offspring might or might not appear anything like the parents.

An apple is still one of the easiest, healthiest, most portable things we can

enjoy. I have found having one around 4 p.m. gives me a burst of energy that no candy bar can match. Plus, as they say, an apple a day is good for apple growers and for our well-being.

One of my goals for this year is a series of small steps to keep me as healthy as possible. Many of my landscape clients are doctors and I much more enjoy seeing them outside of their offices than in their exam rooms.

So here’s to staying positive while testing negative. Take some simple steps toward a healthier you in 2019, because standing still is not an option.

Jim Sollecito is the first lifetime senior certified landscape professional in NYS. He operates Sollecito Landscaping Nursery in Syracuse. Contact him at 468-1142 or jim@sollecito.com.

Bernie Henderson stands in his backyard on Lake Ontario.

I’ve always been civically engaged both as a board member and volunteer for multiple nonprofit organizations. Whether it is basic human needs, literacy, historic preservation or something in between, there is one common thread that connects all of my charitable interests: community.

Rooted Giving: Bernie Henderson

I am a native Oswegonian; my family’s history in Oswego County goes back generations. This – coupled with my upbringing on a farm where I lived the family maxim “work hard and don’t complain” – instilled in me a strong sense of commitment to people and place.

It was natural for me to choose Oswego County as the benefactor of my charitable legacy. By directing a portion of my estate to the Community Foundation for the benefit of the Oswego County Community Foundation, an endowment fund that supports community needs in Oswego County, I hope to set an example that will inspire others. This region is worth working to preserve and enhance for generations.

Read more of Bernie’s story at Henderson.5forCNY.org

since 1927 cnycf.org (315) February / March 2019 422-9538 - 55 PLUS 9

DiningOut

By Christopher Malone

Restaurant

Guide

The thick cut of the fillet at In Between was cooked very well and packed a lot of flavor.

The Inn Between

T

Dinner at this Camillus restaurant lives up to the definition of a dining experience

he Inn Between, which is located at 2290 W. Genesee Turnpike in Camillus, has a longstanding history of serving the community. The restaurant, which was founded in the early 1970s, is housed in an old farm house that dates back over 100 years.

According to The Inn Between’s website, the home belonged to Thomas Hill Munro. The property was part of a successful dairy farm, and Munro himself was a notable name and face throughout the community. There is a fair amount of history in a short read on the website. The farmhouse is even

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55 PLUS - February / March 2019

famous for hosting one of the earliest meetings for the Republican Party, which evolved from the Free Soil Party.

The Inn Between maintains the homelike aesthetic. A complimentary coat check is available to stow the winter layers. The soft lighting is romantic and warm. We were seated immediately after confirming our reservation to a table dressed in white linen, topped with red napkins and clean silverware. Our server John was a gregarious gent, with a big personality and smoky laugh. He treated us well throughout the night.

When he brought the half-bottle order

of Chianti ($12.95) to the table, he offered the first sip to my partner for approval.

To kick the meal off, we opted for the lobster bisque and clams casino (both at $7.95). The bisque came out as the description read on the menu.

The broth was the very definition of creamy and presented a hint of sherry.

The pieces of lobster were also present, in an appropriate amount.

The clams casino may have edged out the bisque as our favorite starter of the two. The clams were topped with crispy bits of bacon and a crumb topping. The amount of pepper and

The clams casino, a common appetizer, packs a lot of flavor in a half-shell. salt were balanced, and the latter really pulled out the flavor. The clams were also not gritty.

Before our entrees came out, we were served the complimentary bread, homemade butter and salads.

The bread consisted of a few rolls — plain, poppy seed, and asiago-topped.

I enjoy asiago cheese, but approach it carefully, as if it were a fierce animal.

The cheese baked onto the roll was a perfect amount. The date bread was also a notable option, too, which was presented as few small squares.

My partner opted for the salad with lemon poppy seed dressing, which coated mixed greens and an array of vegetable staples. I chose the Caesar salad with E. coli-free, crispy romaine lettuce. The dressing was flavorful and creamy. As simple as the salads were, they did right. The ingredients were fresh and colorful. Apparently the Caesar was not included with my entrée, and I was charged $3.95.

Choosing the entrees was the difficult part. We wanted to pick one from each column — the classics and the entrees. Although the names of the sections weren’t creative, the options were all appealing enough to be talked about. The crispy roast duckling ($32.95) was picked from the classic section and the filet mignon ($36.95) from on the other was ordered.

The prices of the entrees are on the medium-high end for Central New York eateries. Frankly, the tags weren’t intimidating. The Inn Between name precedes itself, so newcomers may have an idea of what to expect when it comes to finer dining.

Cooking the thick cut of fillet mignon can be a challenging task.

Although a little dry, the duck entree was a generously sized dish.

Although the outer section of the cut of meat was cooked pretty well, the rest of the steak was cooked as ordered. It was topped with good ol’ sautéed mushrooms and The Inn Between’s house mustard sauce. The flavor was pretty spectacular and balanced. It’s a solid entrée staple for many restaurants, and this restaurant executed their version well.

The portion of duck was a generous one. The half-duck was served with a heap of mashed potatoes and pile of veggies. The potatoes were swirled high and torched for a crispy outside.

The fresh spud side had a great hint of garlic, which won my attention.

The duck sat atop sage stuffing and had a drizzle of fruit sauce to top it. Unfortunately, the majority of the quacker itself was dry. It wasn’t Griswold-Christmas-turkey dry — there were amazing meaty parts — but my jaw and chompers got a good workout.

The saving graces were the sauce and the sage stuffing, especially the latter. I personally want to replicate it.

The sauce did hide the drier aspects, but the skin was too far gone, but getting a forkful of duck and dressing paired well and lessened the severity of this critique.

Although our stomachs were satisfied, we decided to end the meal on a high note with dessert.

Throughout the evening our eyes were teased with an array of sweet treats. We chose the elaborate-looking dessert with whipped cream and fresh

strawberries between slices of crispy, almond-riddled pastry ($8.95) that flaked when cut into; a cup of decaf coffee ($2.75) helped wash it down.

We chose wisely. The homemade dessert was light enough for us to not feel like we overate, although we did overeat. Before the tip, the bill came to $114.40.

We arrived at 5:30 p.m. and left after 8 p.m.

Dinner at The Inn Between definitely lives up the definition of a dining experience. There’s no question about its integrity and longevity. The restaurant presents a satisfying meal, and encourages patrons to enjoy the food and the company of others, whether it’s a date or an evening out with friends or family.

The Inn Between 2290 W. Genesee Turnpike, Camillus, NY 13031 Phone: 315-340-6454 Website/Social www.inn-between.com www.facebook.com/ The-Inn-BetweenRestaurant-100853956626328/ www.instagram.com/ theinnbetweenrestaurant Hours Sunday: 2 p.m. – 8 p.m.

Mon.: Closed Tues. – Sat.: 4:30 p.m. – 9 p.m.

February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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55+

breweries

Cabin Fever?

Hit a Local Brewery

By Chris Malone

Wintertime: Good time to enjoy old and new breweries in the region

F

or those looking to avoid cabin fever but still stay warm this winter, a little liquid confidence will enhance their determination to plow (or shovel) through. We’re talking about beer.

Historically speaking, Genesee Brewing Company in Rochester and F.X. Matt Brewing Company/Saranac in Utica — respectively opening in 1878 and 1888 — are the grandparents of the Upstate New York brewing industry.

Rochester ’s Rohrbach Brewing Company with Dundee Brewing Company (Genesee Brewing) and Syracuse’s Empire Brewing Company and Middle Ages Brewing Company have seniority with opening in the early to mid 1990s.

Last July, Tim Shore and his brother-in-law Sam Kim opened the doors to their Buried Acorn Brewing Company at 881 Van Rensselaer St. in Syracuse. Shore said he’s enjoying being a business owner, especially in a redeveloping the Inner Harbor area.

“My mother bought me a Mr. Beer kit, and I kind of started with that,” Shore said with a chuckle. “I

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was working at Burnt City [Brewing] in Chicago for a while, and I learned a lot from those guys.”

Shore, a Central New York native, moved to pursue passions in the music industry and found himself in the Windy City. Now he’s home and close to family, sharing and even educating people about his love and passion for craft beer.

Buried Acorn is also a New York farm brewery. Shore said they have to purchase at least 20 percent of the ingredients going into their products in-state. They are around 90 percent with their malt coming from 1886 Malt in Fulton and most of their hops coming from Wolcott. Some specialty hops are purchased from California and overseas.

P e t e K i r k g a s s e r, o w n e r o f Eastwood Brewing at 108 Walter Dr. in Syracuse, has more years under his belt with the brewing industry. Eastwood celebrated its fifth anniversary last year, but the brewer ’s experience begins decades ago and homebrewing in the ‘80s. Although he gets hops from the Pacific Northwest (“flavorful and

aromatic”) he loves Thomas Fawcett malts from England and FrangoBelges.

“My dad and I started together,” Kirkgasser said. “This was pre-internet, and our research was done by reading books.” He then got a part-time job at the former Towpath Brewery on Erie Boulevard for a few years until it closed. After going back to nonindustry employment, he landed a job as a brewery supervisor at Saranac.

He started with his current business, which was formally known as Double Barrel Brewing, in the early ‘90s. It was a one-barrel brewing system, which he still has today. As part of the craft beer niche, Eastwood Brewing is technically a nano brewery due to the small production system.

However, the establishment offers around eight types of beers on a regular basis.

“It’s fine. I have to brew a lot of beer. I’m here seven days a week,” Kirkgasser added. “I love my job. I love being a small brewery; it’s easy to control. Every day is still exciting.”

Kirkgasser does look forward to

growing a little bit. He briefly talked about goals of expanding to a three-barrel system, a larger tasting room, and eventually being able to hire more full-time employees.

Growing industry The brewery industry in Central New York is obviously growing. After the turn of the century, the number of local breweries born has given Irish Catholic people a run for their money. From War Horse Brewing Company in Geneva to Eastwood Brewing Company in Syracuse, C e n t r a l N e w Yo r k b e e r i s fermenting and finishing smooth.

“It’s just the beginning for the growth for this area. It’s going to accelerate and grow beyond what people can expect,” said Shore, the co-owner of Buried Acorn Brewing Company. “We have our staples … but there is more interest.”

About eight years ago, Shore and brother Sam Kim were debating opening up a brewery in Chicago. There were almost 20 at the time, and there were even more in the works. They were skeptical and uncertain of saturating the market. Currently there are a couple hundred. “We were wrong about that,” Shore said with a laugh; so a local saturation won’t happen any time soon.

“I think [breweries] need to spread out a little more …

N

but the primary clientele is right here in Syracuse,” Kirkgasser said.

“There will be growth, and it’s sustainable. The newer kids aren’t going to do what mom and dad did. The breweries may flatten out. There might be a saturation, but I’ll be gone before then. But who is to say what’s in store for the future?”

For the non-beer drinkers, there is always something to enjoy at a brewery. Buried Acorn offers wine. They also carry an array of board and card games, hold weekly trivia nights, and offer special events such as planter building workshops.

Eastwood focuses on beer, but the establishment also boasts board games and pinball machines. The former has a couple televisions, but the latter has a radio.

“The main purpose is so people will talk to each other,” Kirkgasser said. “Hey, two marriages have come out of here … and two pregnancies.”

Kirkgasser also said there is a camaraderie among the brewers.

They’ll meet up at another ’s brewery and talk about the industry. “We all look out for each other. We have our own Facebook page where we all communicate.

And we exchange products if someone needs something.”

Time to Hit a Local Brewery

ot all of us in Central New York are winter people.

Skiing, snowshoeing, or anything alluding to or with the word “snow” in the name may not be a part of a person’s dictionary. Don’t worry, here is a little something to coax you out of the house.

For those looking to avoid cabin fever but still stay warm this winter, we’ve compiled a list of breweries and cideries in the region. These are the primary breweries in our neck of the woods, but more can be found on various websites – The New York State Brewers Association, for instance – or

trifold and bifold materials found in tourism depots.

More and more are popping up on a regular basis. Enjoy and drink local! See what style fits your fancy and please enjoy responsibly.

Beak & Skiff 2708 Lords Hill Road, LaFayette, NY 13084 Phone: 315-696-6085 Web: beakandskiff.com

Buried Acorn Brewing Company 881 Van Rensselaer St., Syracuse, NY 13204 Phone: 315-552-1499 Web: buriedacorn.com

Critz Farms Brewing & Cider Co. 3232 Rippleton Road / state Route 13, Cazenovia, NY 13035 Phone: 315-662-3355 Web: critzfarms.com

Bottomless Brewing 3543 E. Lake Road, Geneva, NY 14456 Phone: 315-325-4380 Web: bottomlessbrewing.com

Cellar Door Brewing 17 W. Cayuga St., Oswego, NY 13126 Phone: 315-207-2381

Eastwood Brewing Company 108 Walter Drive, Syracuse, NY 13206 Web: facebook.com/ EastwoodBrewingCompany

Empire Brewing Company – 33 Rippleton Road, Cazenovia, NY 13035 – 120 Walton St., Syracuse, NY 13202 Phone: Farm: 315-655-2337 Downtown Syracuse: 315-475-2337 Web: empirebrew.com

February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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Erie Canal Brewing Company & Tap Room 135 S. Peterboro St., Canastota, NY 13032 Phone: 315-875-3030 Web: eriecanalbrewingcompany. com Full Boar Craft Brewery & Tap Room 628 S. Main St., North Syracuse, NY 13212 Phone: 315-802-4784 Web: fullboarbrew.com GAEL Brewing Company 4180 state Route 14, Geneva, NY 14456 Phone: 315-220-0190 Web: gaelbrewing.com Good Nature Farm Brewery 1727 state Route 12B, Hamilton, NY 13346 Tap Room: 8 Broad St., Hamilton, NY 13346 Phone: 315-824-2337 Web: goodnaturebrewing.com The Good Shepherds Brewing Co. 132 Genesee St.,

Auburn, NY 13021 Phone: 315-406-6498 Web: shepsbeer.com IBU Brewing 703 Brewerton Road, Syracuse, NY 13212 Web: ibubrewing.com Lunkenheimer Craft Brewing Co. 8920 N. Seneca St., Weedsport, NY 13166 Phone: 315-8347027 Web: lunkenheimercraftbrewing.com

Phone: 585-396-2537 Web: nakeddovebrewing.com

Web: facebook.com/ SahmBrewCo

Orange Crate Brewing Company 731 S. Crouse Ave., Syracuse, NY 13210 Phone: 315-824-2337 Web: orange-crate.business.site Prison City Pub & Brewery 28 State St. Auburn, NY 13021 Phone: 315-604-1277 Web: prisoncitybrewing. com

Stout Beard Brewing 126 Dell St. Syracuse, NY 13210 Phone: 315-214-5404 Web: stoutbrewingcompany.com

Red Hawk Brewing 4504 Bussey Road, Syracuse, NY 13215 Phone: 315-4915158 Web: redhawkbrewing. com

Middle Ages Brewing Company 120 Wilkinson St., Syracuse, NY 13204 Phone: 315-4764250 Web: middleagesbrewing.com

Sahm Brewing 203 S. Salina St., Syracuse, NY 13202 Phone: 315-8777246

Naked Dove 4048 state Route 5 and 20, Canandaigua, NY 14424

War Horse Brewing Company 623 Lerch Road, Geneva, NY 14456 Phone: 315-585-4432 Web: warhorsebrewing.com WeBe Brewing Company 796 Pre Emption Road, Geneva, NY 14456 Phone: 315-325-4834 Web: webebrewing.com Willow Rock Brewing Company 115 Game Road, Syracuse, NY 13210 Phone: 315-928-6948 Web: willowrockbrew.com WT Brews 18 E Genesee St., Baldwinsville, NY 13027 Phone: 315-857-3266 Web: wtbrews.com

Live with Loretto Loretto’s Assisted Living Facilities

315.446.5718

LiveWithLoretto.org/AssistedLiving

Specializing in Dementia Care

Sedgwick Heights 14

55 PLUS - February / March 2019

The Bernardine

Buckley Landing

The Heritage

3.5 x 4.75” 55+ - St. Luke - Christ.Comm.

Overlooking Onondaga & Tully Valleys

Convenient, comfortable and affordable senior living!

Newly Remodeled 55+ Community

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Christopher Community offers safe, subsidized one bedroom apartments for income qualified seniors and mobility impaired individuals in a variety of neighborhood settings. Call today.

821 East Brighton Ave, Syracuse, NY 13205

St Luke Apartments 131 W First St Oswego, NY 13126 315-343-0821 StLukes @christopher-community.org

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55+

movies Running the Show at Manlius Art Cinema As movie theater turns 100, owner Net Tobin and wife Eileen Lowell reflect on running the business

By Mary Beth Roach

T

he Manlius Art Cinema might be regarded as small, but it recently marked a big anniversary, celebrating its 100th year. Making sure that the show has gone on for more than 26 of those years is its owner Nat Tobin.

The movie house is not the typical theater by any means. It isn’t in a mall but right in the heart of Manlius, at 135 E. Seneca St. It doesn’t necessarily show the current blockbusters, but independent and foreign language films. And audiences are not just going to catch a flick there. They are going to be treated to an experience, and Tobin and his wife, Eileen Lowell, strive to make sure of that.

For the most part, the films they show are thought-provoking and encourage conversation. They “don’t end in the theater. They end in the car ride home,” Tobin said.

The couple greets their audiences at the door and sells them their tickets, popcorn, other treats and their beverages.

“We are a niche,” Lowell said.

“Many of our moviegoers just hate going to the mall. It’s very impersonal. They like coming to a place where they’re appreciated, they’re recognized, they’re welcome, 16

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valued, where somebody knows how they drink their coffee, wants to talk to them about last week’s movie.”

And the popcorn’s great, she said, with a smile.

Prior to the actual showing, Tobin often talks with the audiences about the film they’re about to see. It’s a practice he started when he was running the Westcott Theater near Syracuse University, from 1997 to 2007 — and the moviegoers truly respond to it.

“What I found was that there was an instant rapport with the audience,” Tobin said. “I like to give the audience information that they wouldn’t have, they wouldn’t avail themselves to, that might make it a little more interesting or make it a bit more impressive to them.”

For example, during the run of “At Eternity’s Gate,” a recent film shown at Manlius about painter Vincent Van Gogh, Tobin shared that in a one-year period, the painter had completed

several hundred paintings, drawings and watercolors.

After some films there have also been discussions, with professors from Syracuse University as moderators.

Tobin’s talks about the films make the viewing a richer experience for audiences, his wife said.

“Nat knows so much about the industry, about the directors, that he can add another layer to the experience,” she added.

Tobin, 70, brings to this job decades’ worth of experience in the field. He has been associated with films for decades.

A friend of his parents was a senior vice president at United Artists, so he was exposed to films, especially United Artists films, he joked.

Tobin had started working in advertising with United Artists. He would later change companies, which brought him to Syracuse in 1982. He befriended Sam Mitchell, who at the time, owned both the Westcott and the Manlius theaters. Tobin managed the

Westcott from 1997 until 2007, when it closed. It was reopened as a venue for live shows. Mitchell would offer him the opportunity to run the Manlius in 1992, and Tobin said that he told Mitchell that if he ran it and could turn it around, he’d buy it from him.

“I quickly came to like not only the product we were showing, but also the people who were coming to see it,” Tobin said.

His wife, Eileen Lowell, 69, became his partner in life and in his work at the theater when the two married in 2006.

Born in Long Island, she came to Central New York about 20 years ago, and was a social studies and French teacher in Seneca Falls at the time they were married. She continued to commute from the couple’s home in the eastern suburbs of Syracuse to Seneca Falls for six years, until she retired in 2012.

She said that she sees her work at the theater a continuation of her work as an educator. “Finding films that help people to think, to feel, to form opinions, ones that last after they leave the theater,” she said.

Although they have some parttime employees, Tobin and Lowell do most of the tasks at the theater themselves. They choose the films, listening to recommendations from their audiences; handle the bookings and the bookkeeping; and Tobin operates the digital projection system.

The Manlius Art Cinema recently celebrated 100 years in business. Owner Nat Tobin has run the theater for the last 26 years. He is shown with his wife Eileen Lowell.

Changes in the industry Moving over to the digital system was a big change for the theater, but one that needed to be made in order to keep the doors open, Tobin said.

He conceded that not all the changes in the industry over the past few years have been advantageous to them.

How the theaters pay for film rentals has changed, he noted. It used to be that the rental fees would decline over the weeks that the films would run, but now theaters pay the same rate from day one to the end, so it is not cost-effective to run a film more than a couple of weeks.

The industry’s trend to rush films to other platforms does not work well for the independent and foreign language films that the Manlius runs.

These genres often rely on word-ofmouth to attract an audience, he said,

Nat Tobin shown next to the digital projection system. Moving over to the new system was a big change for the theater, but one that needed to be made in order to keep the doors open, Tobin said. and it takes some time to build that kind of momentum.

Moreover, this trend takes away from the theater experience, as Tobin explained.

“Moviegoing in a theater is a social event. Movies are funnier when you see it with other people. Movies are sadder when you see it with other people,” he said. Seeing films on the big screen also allows people to experience them as the director had intended, he added.

But one trend in the industry — the showing of alternative content — is proving favorable for the Manlius Art Cinema. They’ve shown productions from the National Theater in London

and some live-filmed Broadway shows.

Tobin suggested that seeing these shows on film might even be better than seeing them live, since the cinema audiences are viewing it from the camera’s perspective and can see closeups of the actors and their expressions.

Continuing to enhance the movie experience, building a rapport with the audience and adding to the culture of the community are aspects of their work for which the Tobin and Lowell are most proud.

“For me I couldn’t find a better thing to do with my life. It’s wonderful to be able to go out in public and have people come up to us, and say, ‘we love what you do,” Tobin said.

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my turn

By Bruce Frassinelli Email: bruce@cny55.com

‘Baby, It’s Cold Outside’ Controversy over lyrics reflects change in times, attitudes

Y

ou probably heard the ruckus raised a few months ago when a Cleveland radio station decided to ban the traditional Christmas time song “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” one of the more outlandish manifestations of the MeToo movement.

Several other radio stations and CBC Music pulled the song from their playlists, too. After numerous complaints of censorship, including a highly visible campaign by Star Trek star William Shatner, CBC restored the song to its Christmas lineup.

I want to make it perfectly clear that I support the ongoing efforts of women and men calling attention to sexual abuse, date-rape and bullying in the workplace. Sometimes, however, even the best of intentions are misguided and get off track.

I see this as one of these cases.

As with many nationwide controversies where something is banned or censored, interest soars. As one news outlet said, the song “may be getting the cold shoulder from some listeners, but the uptick in sales and streaming shows that many people are still enjoying the holiday classic.”

Of course, let’s not forget the curiosity factor. Some younger people who had never heard the song wanted to hear the lyrics for themselves to see what all the hubbub was about.

I played the song for my grandson and his girlfriend, both 23, and they looked at each other, shrugged and wondered what all the fuss was about.

The song was written nearly 75 years ago by famed songwriter Frank Loesser, but it really caught on five

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years later when it was performed in the 1949 film “Neptune’s Daughter” starring swimming star Esther Williams and Latin heartthrob Ricardo Montalban. The song won that year’s Academy Award for best song in a motion picture.

If you remember the song, you will recall that there is no mention of a specific holiday, but because of its winter theme, it caught on as one of the traditional Christmastime melodies.

Eight recordings were released in 1949 after the film’s release, and there have been more than 30 more versions recorded since then. One of the most popular features Dean Martin and Marilyn Maxwell. Sales of this 1959 version of the song soared by 54 percent to 8.2 million streams in one week in December.

Responding to the controversy, Martin’s daughter, Deana, said her father “would be going insane” if he were alive and heard that the stations had banned the song.

So what prompted this censorship? Executives at WDOK in Cleveland and KOIT in San Francisco said some listeners complained that the song contained lyrics that sent the wrong message about consent.

The first time I heard the song as a teenager, I thought it was cute, a little on the flirty side with this back and forth over whether the woman should spend the night as her companion suggests or whether she should stick to the conventions of the day and go forth into that stormy, windy and snowy blizzard.

She’s torn over what her parents and the neighbors would think if she stayed, but it is so horrible out there. We never know for sure what she decided, but it is implied that she stayed. Naturally, as was the case in the ‘40s and ‘50s, we are left with our own imagination as to what might have happened after that.

The banning of the recording did not go over well. After days of backlash from outraged listeners, KOIT relented and returned the song to its holiday offerings. “After hearing from thousands of Bay Area listeners via polling, phone calls, emails and social media, KOIT concluded that the vast majority consider the song to be a valuable part of their holiday tradition, and they still want to hear it on the radio,” the station said in a statement.

Let’s examine some of the lyrics in this duet — regular type is what the female sings; italics represent the male rejoinders: I really can’t stay (But baby it’s cold outside) I’ve got to go away (But baby it’s cold outside) This evening has been… (Been hopin’ that you’d drop in) So very nice (I’ll hold your

hands, they’re just like ice) My mother will start to worry (Beautiful, what’s your hurry?)

And father will be pacing the floor (Listen to the fireplace roar) So, really, I’d better scurry (Beautiful, please don’t hurry) Well, maybe just a half a drink more (Put some records on while I pour) The neighbors might think… (Baby, its bad out there) Say, what’s in this drink? (No cabs to be had out there) Some complaints centered around the woman’s question of what was in the drink. In modern times, of course, the first thought is that the man spiked her drink, but back in the ‘40s when the song was written, the question implies that the drink is stronger than she expected or a cover pretending that she was not expecting alcohol.

In that era, it was considered scandalous for a single woman to stay overnight with a man. The woman is torn between abiding by the social norms of the day and her fondness for her date. Let’s not forget about that raging snowstorm outside, too.

Later in the song, there is this exchange, which also brought complaints from some listeners: I simply must go (But baby, it’s cold outside) The answer is `no’ (But baby, it’s cold outside) The concern is that the woman has said “no,” but her companion keeps insisting that it’s cold outside and that she should stay.

The way people react to the lyrics seems to have become an annual pastime and obsession. Some call “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” the “date-rape anthem,” while others roll their eyes and urge the critics to “get a life.”

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second act

No Bad Weather for Former Weatherman Meteorologist Dave Eichorn used to forecast the weather at WSYR NewsChannel 9; now he is all about creating pieces of furniture

T

he forecast appears sunny for former meteorologist Dave Eichorn, who has taken his long-term interest in woodworking to a new level, creating and selling his furniture pieces in two Central New York shops, as well as through his website.

One bench sold after only about a week on display, and he has donated pieces to local nonprofits as well for their fundraising initiatives.

After leaving WSYR NewsChan-

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By Mary Beth Roach nel 9 in 2016, Eichorn took up a teaching post at SUNY College of Environmental Science and Forestry, but he’s leaving that job after this semester, enabling him to devote more time to his woodworking.

“It was a tough decision,” he said.

“But I just decided, this is what I want to do.”

“This” is making furniture, something that the 64-year-old’s been doing for more than 30 years. He hasn’t sold any of the pieces until he left the

television station.

Up until then, he’s crafted about one-third of the furniture in his home in Tully, which he shares with his wife, Gwen, and many pieces are in their place in the Adirondacks.

These pieces include coffee tables, a writing desk, and a bedroom set. His workshop is in the basement of his home.

A friend who collected various woods, both domestic and more exotic species from around the world,

introduced Eichorn to the craft.

While his friend’s specialty was in finishing the woods, Eichorn wanted to do more.

“Once I got exposed to it, that was it,” he said.

So, he bought textbooks, practiced and admittedly made a lot of mistakes, but through it all, he learned how to do things correctly. He has become proficient at the skill of making mortises and tenons and then joining them together with glue instead of nails or screws.

Although his earlier work was a bit crude, his very first piece has stood the test of time. He had made a coffee table for his home in the early 1980s, and today it sits in his son’s apartment near Ithaca.

His work schedule at the television station allowed him the time to really hone some of his woodworking skills off hours. He would work at the station from about 1:30 p.m. and not return home until after midnight. So, for the first half of the day, while his family was not home and his friends were at work, he had time to woodwork.

Eichorn said now that he has learned some of the basics of proper joinery, he’s breaking out and experimenting.

“I am getting more artsy. I like the whole idea of contemporary rustic.

It’s like for the rustic part of it, you let the work do the artwork for you. And the rest is up to me,” he said.

It’s the lines, or grain, and the color of the woods that resonate with Eichorn.

“One of the things I love in wood is the figure, the movement and the figure in the wood itself — what people call the grain. I love things with contours. I love maps. I love weather maps with contours,” Eichorn said.

Let the wood speak He never stains his pieces, letting the wood speak for itself. He’ll often blend various species of wood — such as rosewood, birdseye maple, purple heart, and bubinga — and work the grain and color into unique furniture.

While much of the exotic wood he uses was acquired years ago, any new purchases are from sustainable or plantation grown sources, he noted on his website, eichornwoodworking. com. Sensitive to the rarity of some

Eichorn working out of the basement of his Tully home. “Once I got exposed to [woodworking], that was it,” he said of his hobby. of his woods, very little of it goes to waste. He often takes long strips left from other projects, edge join them and glue them, thereby creating beautiful cutting boards.

Always a meteorologist at heart, though, his experience can help him

in the woodworking processes.

“I understand how humidity affects wood, and I understand humidity at a level where most people don’t.

I know how temperature also affects that process and the speed that process affects different woods,” he said.

February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

21

Woods expand, contract and breathe, and can be impacted with big changes in weather, so with his knowledge, he can determine if certain parts of a project need to be completed sooner than later.

He’s self-taught until about two years ago, when he decided to attend a weeklong summer workshop at the Center for Furniture Craftsmanship in Maine.

“What I want to try to do is back up and get some formal training in the fundamentals. If for no other reason, I want to become reaffirmed that what I think I’m doing right, I actually am doing right. If I’m doing something wrong, I want to find out about it and correct it,” he said.

He’s been at this for decades, and one might think he’s mastered the art after all this time, but Eichorn continues to evolve.

“It never stops. I’m going backwards and forwards. I’m going forward stylistically and breaking out of square lines, getting into some contemporary form, which is a real struggle for me because I’m not really an artist. I can’t paint; I can’t sculpt.

When I see something, and I like it, I know it.”

His efforts to grow as a woodcrafter have been enhanced too.

His furniture is featured at Cazenovia Artisans, a co-op in the heart of that village that showcases handcrafted art from painting to jewelry and pottery to soap making.

Although that shop has been around for about 17 years, Eichorn just became a member within the last 18 months, so in addition to creating and selling his furniture as a member of the co-op, he works shifts at the stop as well.

It’s been an experience that has only enhanced his creative process.

He easily engages with the customers that come in, but the other artisans and their work motivate him.

“It’s been a huge help. I see other people in here going through the same struggles as me, trying to evolve, and it gives me comfort. There’s a brethren spirit,” he said. “It’s inspiration in here. When I come, especially on days when it’s not terribly busy, I’m able to look around through the store and pick up snippets and ideas.

“You wouldn’t believe some of the design ideas I’ve gotten just from looking at wall art in here,” he added.

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Downsizing They’re Just Things, Right?

By Cheryl Costa

S

ome time ago I wrote in 55 PLUS magazine about embracing the idea of moving out of the big old house and moving into a 55-plus apartment community. One of the challenges with this sort of effort is the amount of things you have accumulated over the years.

Moving from a house into an apartment isn’t just a simple move of furniture but also an exercise in dealing with a lifetime accumulation of “stuff.” Note that I didn’t say junk! Yes, yes, I know there are important things in your stuff. There are some things of great financial value, other artifacts of remembrance and emotional value and, of course, a quantity of junk.

In preparation for our household move, we figured out that we had way too much furniture. So we drew out a floor plan of the new apartment and made scale size paper furniture cutouts. Then we spent a day over sandwiches and tea arranging and rearranging potential proposed layouts. Some layouts worked, others failed miserably. In the end we had to make hard emotional decisions about what furniture we really wanted and what really worked in the size of the apartment.

Before you suggest, “well, you can sell the excess furniture online someplace,” please take into account the amount of effort that takes. We were in a time crunch. We decided to be charitable; we let a few close friends have the pick of the lot before we donated most of our excess furniture to charities like Goodwill.

The next challenge was all the accumulated smaller stuff both in the house as well as “out of sight and mind” in offsite stowage. I decided to start by visiting my nearby storage unit. Truth be told,

I’d been dragging around stuff and storing it for up to 25 years. This was a time of reckoning, it was high time to enter that storage unit like it was an ancient tomb and dig into is long forgotten secrets.

I began with 12 boxes of emotional landmines, each that had to be carefully examined. Care had to be taken to not allow the emotional tentacles to yet entrap my heart once more before I tossed many items into a heavy duty trash bags.

In the end, I managed to purge a huge amount of material. One box remained of most favored mementos that I truly wanted to keep. I had filled nine trash bags. I dragged those “emotional landmines” of previous marriages kicking and screaming to the dumpster.

The storage unit purge exercise freed critically needed room in order to stage household stuff for later evaluation, saving and some eventual purging. The approach we used with the apartment was to take over only things of a utility nature to the new apartment. Then only things are really were attached to. Yes there were emotional sobbing events about some items. Both of us found both joy and sorrow as we went through “stuff.” In one room I used to an office, eight garbage bags came out and only four banker’s boxes of stuff for stowage at the storage unit.

If there was a lesson to be learned in all of this effort, it was, “you don’t own things, they own you with emotional attachments that must be reckoned with sooner or later.”

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February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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genetics

A New Half-Sister, Thanks to DNA Testing DNA testing helps local woman to discover a half-sister she never knew she had

By Deborah Jeanne Sergeant

W

ondering about your roots? DNA testing can provide answers as to the question of your ancestry.

While Mom may declare you’re half this, a quarter that and another quarter something else, DNA testing can give solid answers based on science — not family folklore — as to where your blood relatives originated.

A growing number of baby boomers like connecting with their past and learning they’re related to notable people in history or linking themselves with important events because of where their ancestors lived.

Companies such as AncestryDNA. com and 23andMe.com generate ancestral origin information through analyzing participants’ saliva samples that they mail in.

Mark Slosek, city of Oswego historian, said that the ability to find lost relatives and reconnect is, in most cases, a pretty good thing. “People now understand they have the ability to trace their ancestors because of the DNA tests. It gives you a place to go and lets you know who your relatives and ancestors might be,” he said.

Two years ago, Donna Hull24

55 PLUS - February / March 2019

Morgan of Seabrook, Tex., a suburb of Houston, persuaded her sister, Sherryle Hull Godkin of Clyde, Wayne County, to send in an AncestryDNA. com test to learn more about their heritage. While their roots weren’t that surprising — the sisters learned they’re more German in origin than they’d thought — the appearance of an unknown near-relative shocked the sisters who never knew they had a half-sibling.

The half-sister, Lynda Reinhardt, never responded to a message Hull-Morgan sent through the AncestryDNA.com messaging system. Hull-Morgan persisted and her research led her to a woman who lived in Wisconsin.

“We didn’t know — we had no clue of her situation and if she would want to find out,” Hull-Morgan said.

Her father, Daniel W. Hull, had divorced from her mother when HullMorgan was 12. Through researching online obituaries, Hull-Morgan learned Reinhardt was born a year later in the same area where her father lived.

Hull-Morgan sleuthed further and found Reinhardt’s daughter on Facebook and found her adoptive

mother’s obituary.

“What I was thinking is that her mother and my dad got together as a one-night stand,” Hull-Morgan said.

“Her birth mother gave her up for adoption to a family in Wisconsin.”

Daniel Hull, the father, passed away in 1977. Hull-Morgan and Godkin feel certain he would have mentioned a half-sister had he known about her.

“I never had any idea I had a halfsister,” Godkin said, echoing her sister.

“It was a complete shock.”

While visiting the Facebook page of Reinhardt’s daughter, Hull-Morgan accidentally sent her a photo of herself.

Now committed to the mission, HullMorgan revealed who she was and how they were related. The daughter said that her mother had been looking for her birth family since a teenager.

They exchanged contact information.

Once Hull-Morgan called Reinhardt, the two talked and cried together for an hour.

“She thought she was alone,” Hull-Morgan said. “Texas adoption records are sealed and she could not get any information.”

Godkin spent an hour on the

phone with her soon after.

“It was fantastic,” she said. “It was instant love. It helped because she looks like me. We both have Daddy’s nose. We shared a lot of stories.”

Since then the three sisters have met up and spent three days together, exchanging photos and catching up.

They plan to get together again in the spring.

“If you haven’t done DNA testing, do it,” Hull-Morgan said. “You never know what you’ll find. I had a sister I

had no clue I had.”

Godkin feels grateful their family could connect with her half-sister.

“This was wonderful for her as the adoptive girl wondering who she’s from,” Godkin said. “AncestryDNA brought us all together. The more, the merrier. She’s got a good life. It was a happy experience for our family and she is welcome.”

Locally, Upstate DNA Testing serves clients with curiosity about their genes. Alex Gabriel, owner of Upstate

Donna Hull-Morgan, left, and Sherryle Hull Godkin, right, recently found out they had a half-sister, Lynda Reinhardt, center. The discovery was made possible through a DNA testing. Photo courtesy Donna Hull-Morgan

DNA Testing, said that most of his clients request testing for confirming paternity; however, some want a heritage kit to learn their originating country or region. Of those, Gabriel said it’s not uncommon for clients learn about more than they imagined: siblings or children whom they never knew existed.

“It goes both ways,” he said of clients’ reactions to the news. “In some instances, they’re ecstatic because they never had siblings. For others, it’s different.”

Upstate DNA operates offices in several locations in Upstate, including Syracuse and Skaneateles.

Some people may feel embarrassed about unknown relatives because of unfortunate circumstances surrounding the reason for secrecy.

For them, the past should stay buried.

Others take a different outlook, like the Hull sisters or a gentleman Gabriel recalled, who in his 70s felt thrilled to discover a biological daughter and grandchildren, after living for decades believing he could not father children.

Gabriel said that for older people, learning of children or siblings whom they never knew turns out happily most of the time. For younger people, the news often isn’t as welcomed.

“People come in because they want to find out if they’re Irish, but instead, learn their ‘brother ’ isn’t related to them,” Gabriel said.

“Or, they want to know where their ancestors came from, but they don’t want to learn their spouse had a fling years ago and there’s a half-sibling to their own children. The children in these circumstances can be very upset.

But the older the people are, the more understanding they are.”

He recalled another instance where a man apparently fathered a child in 1964, but he said he had no recollection of where he was or with whom he had relationships during that time, “at all,” Gabriel said.

Clients learn about unknown relatives because DNA testing companies allow participants to log their results in a registry. That permits them and the other users to crossreference their DNA and discover relatives.

“I recommend ancestry tests, unless you think you have something to hide, like kids you don’t want someone to know about,” Gabriel said.

February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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55+

cover

Creative Force Behind Mackenzie-Childs The

Rebecca Proctor has designs on the times

B

By Aaron Gifford

right, colorful, loud, energetic, happy, worldly and daring.

The products at MacKenzie-Childs indeed reflect the personality traits of its creative director, Rebecca Proctor, say friends and co-workers.

“Under her leadership, we don’t just make things — we make people happy,” said Mark Burgadon, who has worked there with Proctor for nearly a decade. “It’s in her DNA. She is Mackenzie-Childs. It’s her fiber.”

Proctor, 56, recently embarked upon business trips to Portugal, England, Germany and Japan to help grow her company’s product lines globally and obtain new ideas from different cultures. In March, she’ll travel to India. The Ithaca resident has played a key role during her 27 years there helping transform a modest pottery shop in Aurora, Cayuga County, to a brand that is sought after by collectors worldwide.

Before her departure, she took some time to discuss her journey here and plans for the future.

Proctor was raised in Baltimore.

She has two older sisters. Her father, Sam, was an attorney, and her mother, Ruth, was a homemaker.

Ruth had a knack for interior design that inspired her daughters’ creativity early on. Sam was also a musician. The entire family enjoyed theater, art and music.

“We were always putting on lit26

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tle plays for each other,” Proctor recalled. “Any kind of performance or artwork was encouraged in our house. We grew up in such a creative environment.”

Proctor’s love for the arts brought her to Ithaca College. She began as an aspiring actress but graduated as an art history major with a well-rounded portfolio that included courses in sociology and women’s studies, as well as a job as assistant curator in the art history office.

She never regretted changing

paths, from performing arts to visual arts.

“I loved it,” she said, “and it was nice because you could design your own curriculum.”

Proctor also completed some of her coursework at Cornell University and the Parsons School of Design in New York City. Two summers in a row, Proctor worked as a sous chef in Greenwich, Conn., for Dot Roberts, who owned the tremendously successful Echo Scarf company.

The head chef at the time had

With friend and Evine TV host Kathy Norton in the MacKenzieChilds Farmhouse in Aurora. Photo provided.

At Mackenzie-Childs in Aurora. Photo provided.

A blustery day in Aurora.

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worked with Martha Stewart. Parties at Roberts’ mansion were frequented by the likes of Ralph Lauren and other titans in the fashion and arts industries.

“It was very, very inspiring,” Proctor said. “They were design-oriented business people. It opened my eyes to a lot of things.”

She remained in Ithaca after graduation, opening a retail-clothing store, “High Gear,” with a friend. This was the mid-1980s, an era when college girl fashions were “colorful, fun, funky and forward thinking,” Proctor explained. She owned the store for six years.

“The way we saw it,” she said, “retail was an extension of theater.”

Setting the standard Proctor was reading a magazine one evening after work when she came across an article about Victoria MacKenzie-Childs’ creations. The shop MacKenzie-Childs ran with her husband, Richard, was only 35 miles up Cayuga Lake from Ithaca. Proctor made the trip a few days later. She still remembers her first glance at the property when she drove up the red brick driveway.

Proctor met the couple, discussed her credentials, and was hired as their personal assistant. A short time later, she was traveling with them to Indonesia, England and Eastern Europe.

Proctor was responsible for brokering deals between manufacturers and her company’s designers.

“They trusted me to make sure their designs came to life,” Proctor said. “It was a rare and delightful opportunity.”

With Proctor on board, MacKenzie-Childs enjoyed rapid growth, expanding its product line to include pottery, furniture, rugs, ceramics, tableware, furnishings, home and garden accessories. The store remained at corporate headquarters in Aurora; decades later the company added shops in New York City and then del Lago Resort & Casino in Waterloo.

In 2000, Pleasant Rowland, who created the American Girl brand, took over MacKenzie-Childs and promoted Proctor to lead as the creative director and chief brand officer. Essentially, she was responsible for every visual aspect of the company.

In that role, Proctor continued to 28

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promote “happy colors and patterns.”

MacKenzie-Childs’website shows a dazzling array of gifts. There’s a five-piece place setting painted with the company’s unmistakable checkered design, for $98. There’s a kitchen timer with a colorful flower design for $50. One of the most unique items is the “Forest Fish” chair, which has a maple frame. The back of the chair is made of fish-shaped fabric with painted landscapes. This item, priced at $1,995, is on back order due to high demand. The highest-end pieces of the furniture listed on the site sell for more than $6,000.

Customized approach According to the website, every piece is made by hand and signed by the artist, and no two pieces are identical.

“The most important element we work with is not clay or wood or paint; It is our artisans,” the website says. “Their signature individuality is happily evident on every piece that bears their stamps and our name.

That evidence of the artisan’s hand is what makes each piece a one-of-a kind work of beauty and grace.”

Proctor embraced the onset of online shopping, and saw globalization as a growth opportunity to penetrate new markets as opposed to a Goliath that destroys small businesses. The internet is a great tool, she explained, for communicating with designers and customers across the world.

“Talking to so many people in different countries about painting techniques is a thrill,” she said. “When I got into this field, I never imagined being able to do that.”

Handcrafted goods with the MacKenzie-Childs brand are made all over the world, but the company has committed to remaining in Aurora.

“We’ve enjoyed responsible globalization,” Proctor said.

She loves the travel that comes with the job. Portugal and India are among her favorite places, largely because of the food, color, history and fragrances. She also enjoyed several trips to England, where there’s a huge fanfare for MacKenzie-Childs hand-painted tea kettles.

While overseas, Proctor often visits retail stores that carry MacKenzie-Childs goods. She enjoys speaking engagements, but is just as happy

listening.

“We want people to tell us what we need to do to keep the brand relevant,” Proctor said.

MacKenzie-Childs is a popular brand with celebrities, and Proctor has met many influential folks over the years. One of her favorite customers is Iris Apfel, a fashion icon and world-renowned interior designer who is still going strong at age 97.

The Aurora property, located on a Victorian farm overlooking Cayuga Lake, has also become somewhat of a tourist attraction. The original structure dates back to 1909, and was first used as a dormitory for an all-girls prep school.

The company began producing pottery out of that building in 1983 and later built its headquarters up the road. Free tours of the historic farmhouse are offered year-round, and visitors are also welcome to stroll through the massive gardens.

The company’s annual barn sale, a four-day event, has drawn more than 25,000 customers, locals and international travelers alike. Mackenzie Childs made headlines again recently when Patience Brewster, a famous designer and book illustrator, joined the company’s creative team, bolstering its collection of hand-painted holiday ornaments.

Proctor is married to Robert Aceto, a musician who has performed as a session and touring guitarist with rock ‘n’ roll bands, including the Tom Tom Club. Their son, Alexei, is a classical piano student at Ithaca College.

Even though they live within the city of Ithaca, their home is surrounded by forest, allowing the family and their 150-pound Irish wolfhound to enjoy the Finger Lakes’ four seasons to the fullest.

Loving life Proctor stays fit by taking the huge dog for walks year-round.

During the warmer months, she finds time for gardening. She also has an indoor exercise bike (Peloton) that, via online technology, allows users to participate in live cycling classes to New York City. She calls the experience challenging, fun and great for folks who are “not a fan of gyms.”

“You ride to the levels of the music, so there’s a lot of variety,” she said. “It distracts you from the pain

that can come with exercise.”

She loves to cook and bake, and owns hundreds of cookbooks. Proctor bakes all of the bread consumed in her home and is especially fond of a mostly vegetarian Mediterranean diet. She prefers organic goods and locally grown produce when it’s available, and she limits her sugar intake.

“When I’m home, all I want to do is cook,” she said.

Tammy Dorward, head of the company’s product development team, travels with Proctor overseas, including India and Portugal. Although she’s been with the company for less than two years, “it feels like we’ve been best friends forever.

That’s just the kind of person she is,” Dorward said.

Dorward has tried to uncover some of the secret ingredients to her colleague’s success. Her key findings: peanut butter and the family dog.

“Straight out of the jar, she’ll eat it that way. It’s straight up protein,” Dorward said with a laugh. “Maybe that’s the energy source for that creativity. She’s never on slow mode.

She’s always going 110 mph; it’s impossible to keep up. Themes, ideas, anything you see on our website — she’s the one who had the idea. She is so passionate and funny and truly someone who is so full of life.”

“When she gets thinking about her dog and talking about it, that’s pretty funny,” Dorward added. “Her love and affection for that massive dog just oozes out.”

Burgadon said Proctor spent significant time in every department as part of her climb to the creative director and chief brand officer positions, inspiring everyone she’s met along the way.

“That personality,” he said, “is infectious.”

With the company going so strong and her level of enjoyment as high as it has ever been, Proctor is not even thinking about whether to retire at 65, 75 or even 95. She challenges others to stay positive to the best of their abilities.

“This is an interesting time in the world, but it’s really important to find joy in everything you do,” she said. “I can’t imagine doing anything else.

If work and play feel like the same thing, why would you stop?”

Proctor with Patience Brewster of Skaneateles. “Patience is an amazing individual. She is an extraordinary woman who is famous for her holiday designs,” Proctor says. MacKenzie-Childs recently acquired her company and Brewster is now designing for Mackenzie-Childs.

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aging

By Marilyn L. Pinsky

You Don’t Know What You Don’t Know

W

onderful friends invited me to dinner and made a gourmet meal, one course of which was a pasta dish they had eaten recently in Italy. They had a substitute pasta for me, and when I asked how they knew I was gluten free, the response was, “We know all kinds of things about you from your articles, including that you get up three times a night to pee!”

OK, so maybe it’s too much information, but if I can’t tell you guys, who can I tell? I have all these random thoughts running around in my head calling for resolution, as well as some that I have solved but just need to share so you don’t have to worry about them. For example: I love, love, love my Instant Pot. (As an aside, my husband Philip had this great joke, that for some reason only he and I laughed at, about this man who really, really, really loved his galoshes. Does anyone even know what galoshes are nowadays?)

Anyway, back to the Instant Pot (IP). I really, really, really love my IP. It’s a pressure cooker that won’t explode like the one I had 30 years ago that left beef stew stuck to the kitchen ceiling for two years.

I told the kids it was a piece of art that hung upside down and Philip never looked up, so it worked out.

All right, I can tell you want to hear about the IP already. It is supposed to be impossible to burn food in it and you can set it and leave it be for hours. Which I did — but shouldn’t have. As you can. Burn food in it, that is.

The good news is that I now know how to clean a burnt pot and in my case, that is a valuable life skill to have. Water, dishwashing detergent and baking soda, my new best friends.

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Changing world On another note, I spend a lot of time, when I’m not scrubbing pots that is, wondering about the expression “you don’t know what you don’t know.” What does that mean exactly? I figured a benefit of getting older would be that I’d know whatever “it” is that I don’t know by now. Some stuff I do know I’ll never know, such as why planes full of people stay in the air or is there life on other planets. I figure that I really don’t have to worry about those things as my knowing or not knowing isn’t actually hurting anyone. On the other hand, I don’t want to make bad decisions out of ignorance for anything that is important. And that leads me into racing to keep up with the world.

We are living in such a fast changing world, that how do we know which of what we know is still relevant? It seems every week we learn that something else we were taught in school or even from our parents, religious institutions or government, needs correcting.

In high school, back in the day,

we were not taught certain facts about the Civil War because the people who wrote the text books chose the information they wanted to use and left out what they didn’t want to use. This led to us having beliefs not based in fact, but that we nevertheless carry with us to this day. If we dig in our heels and say ‘that’s what we were taught and we’re too old to change now’, then we don’t give ourselves the exciting opportunity to keep learning and growing and becoming more interesting human beings.

Along this line of thinking, I find it helpful imagining Moses coming down from Mount Sinai again, this time bringing with him revisions, amendments and explanatory clauses to the Ten Commandments.

After all, his boss has been around forever and must realize things aren’t working out quite as planned. I can’t imagine the basics will change that much, but given our history, s/he can figure out where some further clarification is needed and get us to come to agreements that will at least stop murders and wars. We can figure the rest out from there.

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February / March 2019 - 55 PLUS

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55+

benefits

Retirees Getting a Bump in Social Security Benefits Largest increase in benefits in the last few years — 2.8 percent

By Deborah Jeanne Sergeant

I

f you get Social Security benefits, you have likely begun receiving an increase in your check of 2.8 percent in January. That’s an improvement over recent years. In 2016, no one received an increase.

In 2017, it increased by a paltry 0.3 percent. Last year was at 2 percent.

About 67 million are receiving the bump in income. In October 2018, the Social Security Administration paid $63.8 billion in retirement benefits, averaging $1,373.66 per month per retiree.

Why doesn’t the cost of living increase seem to keep pace with inflation in some years, especially for retirees who need costly medication to stay healthy and enjoy a better quality of life? And what decides when and how much benefits should increase?

A caveat of Social Security increases is sometimes Medicare premiums increase, too, negating an increase benefit for those using Medicare. This year, the premium increase starts at $1.50 and goes on up for larger income households, based on tax returns from 2017, not the 2018 tax returns.

“Because Medicare rates are also rising fast, most people haven’t been ahead in recent years,” said Randy Zeigler, certified financial planner with Ameriprise Financial Services in Oswego. “Social Security is adjusted for inflation but because of the withdrawals for Medicare in the past, it doesn’t feel like the Social Security benefit increase is that helpful, because health costs rise faster than the rest of inflation.”

While it’s good news for most American retirees that Medicare costs

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won’t outstrip Social Security increase, many wonder how long the trend will continue.

As inflation increases, showing a strong economy, Social Security payments are supposed to keep pace with the cost of living. Adjustments to the checks “theoretically, are supposed to keep up with cost of living,” Zeigler said. “I think that Social Security will continue to rise because we expect inflation to rise a little as well.”

The driving factor behind how much retirees receive is the Consumer Price Index for Urban Wage Earners and Clerical Workers (CPI-W) issued by the Department of Labor.

While viewpoints vary on how long the increases will continue and how much future increases will be, this is the largest increase in seven years, according to Sonnet Loftus, a certified financial planner professional with Michael, Roberts Associates Inc. in Syracuse.

“The increase is meant to help retirees keep up with rising inflation,”

Loftus said. “By law, if the Consumer Price Index continues to increase, then Social Security benefits will follow suit.”

The CPI-W influence on Social Security payments is supposed to help retirees afford what they need for basic living expenses like goods and services; however, for many retirees of modest means, the cost of health care represents a major spending category.

“Health care costs outpace the cost of living, typically,” said Ryan York, financial advisor and CEO of Pinnacle Capital Management in East Syracuse.

“Social Security is being used less for retirement and more for covering medical care at this point.”

If you want to know your benefit before the first check arrives, you can sign up for or log into an account at https://www.ssa.gov/cola for free information. As another change for 2019, retirees can choose to receive their cost of living adjustment information online or continue to receive it in the postal mail as always.

6 Common Gym Mistakes to Avoid

O

nce you’ve taken all the right steps to find a gym suited to your needs, avoiding some common mistakes will ensure maximum results for the time spent working out.

First, don’t just congratulate yourself for joining a gym — you actually have to go. It’s easier to stick to a schedule when you ink it in your calendar.

Even if you can get there only two or three times a week, make the commitment — being consistent is the only way to get results.

Another mistake is not adjusting exercise equipment to your size and your abilities. That means small but important changes like moving the seat and back positions on weight machines for the best positioning.

That’s just as necessary as moving the pin on the weight stack. If not, you’re likely to use bad form, and that can lead to injuries.

Speaking of form, take advantage of the availability of gym staff to make sure you’re using correct form, whether in a yoga class or strength training. A trainer’s objective eye can help you move through your full range of motion.

Resist getting into a competition with other gym members, even if it’s only in your head. Embrace the spirit of camaraderie so that you can motivate each other.

Avoid settling into a predictable pattern. One advantage of a gym is the variety it offers, from equipment to classes. So don’t get locked into a “forever” routine. That can erode your motivation and lead to fitness plateaus and even an overuse injury.

Finally, don’t forget good gym manners. Leave your phone in your locker, but remember a towel so you can wipe off any sweat as you finish working on each piece of equipment.

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33

reading CNY Reads One Book 55+

Love for reading is behind book discussions taking place in Onondaga County

By Aaron Gifford

S

ome local book worms are especially proud that their group is so hyper-focused. CNY Reads One Book, they boast, is the longest-running one-city/onebook program in New York state.

“If you pick the right one, there’s so much to talk about,” says Alan NaPier, who volunteers with the organization, which is sponsored by Oasis. “The idea is to try to bring the community together to talk about important issues. We are building a community through reading.”

The program, which began in 2001 with the reading of “A Lesson Before Dying,” was inspired by a similar initiative in Washington state called “If all of Seattle Reads the Same Book.”

NaPier, 67, worked at Jamesville Correctional Facility and then the Liverpool Public Library prior to his retirement three years ago. He has played a key role in the local organization’s success. He and other members of a committee that includes English teachers and librarians collectively nominate 10 or 12 books, all of which they must read cover to cover before debating the pros and cons of each work and ultimately agreeing on the final selection to share with the public.

“We look for literary themes, of course, but it also must be a book that’s very approachable,” he said, noting that some reads are fairly current, and others are decades old. In 2015, “The First of July” was selected to note the 100-year anniversary of World War I. The following year, 2016, “To Kill a

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Alan NaPier, who retired from the Liverpool Public Library three years ago, has played a key role in the success of CNY Reads One Book. “If you pick the right [book], there’s so much to talk about,” he says.

Mockingbird” was selected after author Harper Lee died.

“Most folks already read it,” NaPier said, but that didn’t matter.

“It’s still relevant, and there was so much to explore. We love the classics.”

Other past titles include “The Double Bind,” “The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry,” “The Namesake,” “The Tortilla Curtain,” “The Book Thief.”

Technically, the group does not take an entire year to dissect an entire novel. The season runs from January through March with book discussions at varying libraries. All events are open to the public. After the season concludes in the early spring, there’s ample reading time for other novels, memoirs or works of non-fiction for the remainder of the year, and Central New York Reads One Book volunteers can focus on planning and fund-raising efforts.

For 2019, the selected book is “Born a Crime,” by Trevor Noah.

According to NaPier, it’s a very engaging memoir about growing up in South Africa at the end of apartheid.

Noah, host of Comedy Central’s

“The Daily Show,” has become an international celebrity.

Syracuse University required incoming freshmen to read “Born a Crime” this year as part of its diversity initiative. The university also gave Central New York Reads One Book 400 copies of the memoir to share with its participants. Noah was scheduled to speak at SU’s Carrier Dome on Jan. 27, and at the time of this interview, NaPier said many participants were planning to attend.

Interacting with authors, if possible, is part of NaPier’s program.

For example, in previous years participants Skyped with “The First of July” author Elizabeth Speller.

“They weren’t shy at all,” NaPier said proudly. “They asked a ton of questions. It was a great discussion.”

In addition to multiple book discussions each month, the organization has shown films that are adapted from the selected book or share similar themes. It has also arranged trips to see local theatrerperformances based on the books.

The 2019 season kicked off Jan. 10 at the Barnes and Noble book store on Erie Boulevard in DeWitt; NaPier hosted two discussions on “Born a Crime” at the Liverpool Library earlier in the month. For the kick-off event, Rev. Brian E. Konkol, dean of Hendricks Chapel at Syracuse University, was scheduled to reflect on the book’s theme of “Truth, Reconciliation and our struggle to be well.”

Book discussions have been scheduled at various libraries throughout January, February and

Want to Join CNY Reads One Book?

Book discussions sponsored by CNY Reads One Book take place at several libraries in Onondaga County and at Oasis in East Syracuse from January until March 26. They are free and open to the public.

For more information, visit www. cnyreads.org.

March. In addition, at 2 p.m. on Feb. 21, Upstate Oasis hosts South African speakers who will discuss their experience with their native nation’s apartheid, and representatives from the Unchained organization, which advocates for New York State’s incarcerated, will discuss issues pertaining to race and criminal justice in both South Africa and the United States.

Book discussions and events range between less than to a dozen guests to as many as 80 guests. The vast majority of participants are adults, but NaPier has noticed a growing contingency of younger guests in recent years.

NaPier took an interest in reading at an early age. He can’t recall his very first book for certain, but he knows the “Scarlet Letter” was among the first he completed. By the age of 10 he was hooked on the Hardy Boys series. When pressed to name his favorite book of all time, he exclaimed — “that’s a totally unfair question.”

But he does note two books that will always be on his top 10 list – “Larry’s Party,” and “A Student of Weather.”

Participants of CNY Reads One Book during a meeting last year at Barnes and Noble in DeWitt.

These days, he reads about two books per month.

“I’ve never been a speed reader,” NaPier said with a laugh.

As a past library employee and as a volunteer, NaPier often deals with “renewed readers,” or those who got away from enjoying books during much of adulthood as they raised families and dedicated themselves to careers before finally getting enough free time to enjoy a good book. That demographic is factored into CNY Reads One Book’s annual selection.

Likewise, selection committee members also prefer to include titles that are available in large print, on audio versions, and in versions that are available for electronic reading devices.

“One of the things we also consider is some books may physically be too heavy for folks,” he said. “It’s all about including everybody.”

While NaPier considers himself a traditional fan of hardcover and paperback books, he uses a Kindle when travelling. He currently has about 200 books on the device.

Library enthusiasts like NaPier worry that reading for pleasure in the digital age is on the decline.

“I think reading is still very popular,” he says. “There are probably more readers than non-readers in the world, but often I think that over half of the community isn’t reading.”

Regardless of the method for enjoying books and novels, using local libraries and appreciating written works is an important activity that all older adults should engage in to the best of their ability, NaPier says, adding that most of the participants in CNY Reads One Book programs are over 55.

“Reading is so important as we age. It keeps the mind active. Research has already shown how important that is,” he said. “It just makes us smarter, more compassionate. It gives us a broader perspective. A book can help you sympathize with people.”

The bulk of CNY Reads One Book’s fund raising comes from its annual Pennsylvania and Delaware Garden Rumble, a four-day trip that allows guests to stroll through some of the most beautiful gardens in the vicinities of Philadelphia and Wilmington, Del. The deadline to sign up for the event is April 26. The trip takes place in late June.

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55+ cleaninng It’s Complicated Decluttering can be a challenge for those at middle age and beyond — but there are ways to achieve it

By Margaret McCormick

S

tuff happens. We accumulate it little by little over the years — enough to fill a house and sometimes a house, a vacation home and a storage unit: newspapers and magazines, tax returns from 25 years ago, clothing that suits our former work lives, books waiting to be read, thoughtful gifts, unwrapped but never used. The list grows — and the stuff fills our closets, cupboards, shelves, cars, dressers and desks.

We know that “less is more,” but we tend not to live that way.

We see tidy, spare living spaces on TV, on Pinterest and in the pages of magazines and wonder how people achieve such zen. Were they born that way? Clutter is consuming and weighs on us physically, mentally and emotionally.

But how do we break free from it?

Decluttering one’s life at middle age and beyond is complicated, says Carrie Luteran, a professional organizer based in Central New York.

Often, several things are at play. As we age, women and men often desire to downsize their belongings — while also, perhaps, storing things that belong to their children and dealing with the stuff their parents have left behind and that their children don’t want. It can feel extremely overwhelming.

As we begin a new year with a fresh start and clean slate mindset, Luteran suggests a simple exercise. Do a little self-reflection and ask yourself some questions: Who are you? Where are you in your life? Where do you want your life to be in a year? Visualize it. How can you get there?

“We hang onto a lot of things

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from the past and it’s not really positive,’’ says Luteran, who owns and operates Pretty Neat Solutions, a home organization and interior design solutions business. “Certainly keeping some sentimental things is important. But if you are hanging onto a hobby from 10 years ago, that might be keeping you from developing a new hobby. Think about your life now

The KonMari Method of Decluttering Organizing consultant Marie Kondo is the author of “The LifeChanging Magic of Tidying Up: the Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing.’’ The book has become something of a cultural phenomenon.

Despite its title, Kondo’s approach to decluttering advocates paring down possessions in one fell swoop, rather than in steps or stages.

That approach might be too extreme for some, but Kondo believes that discarding must precede organizing — and that both bring joy.

The KonMari method of discarding begins with clothes, followed by books, papers, miscellany and mementos.

Kondo and her book have inspired a new Netflix series, “Tidying Up

and what’s next for you. Think about getting rid of things.’’

You might be asking yourself, “why is this so hard?’’ And you wouldn’t be alone.

Nicole Christina, a Syracuse-based psychotherapist with a focus on positive aging, says decluttering/ downsizing for the next chapter of life is challenging because our stuff carries with Marie Kondo.’’ In the series, Kondo helps people swimming in too much stuff eliminate clutter and choose joy.

emotional weight — especially sentimental and inherited things, l i k e a grandmother ’s fur coat or china service for 12.

Even if you will never wear the coat or set a table with the china, letting go of such items Christina can cause anxiety and feelings of guilt.

“If decluttering was so easy people would have all their stuff in clear Rubbermaid totes, alphabetically organized,’’ Christina says. “It isn’t easy. There can be some grief in saying, ‘I don’t need this anymore. It’s part of my past.’ There can be some melancholy and bittersweet feelings in getting to the next stage. You may cry.

But there is also an amazing payoff.’’

In the words of Japanese organizing consultant and sensation Marie Kondo: “When we reduce what we own and ‘detox’ our house, it has a detox effect on our bodies as well.

What is important when tidying is not to get rid of everything, but to keep the amount you need and spark joy.’’

Where to start – and how?

You might be inclined to start in the basement or attic, where you have been socking things away for decades.

But that could be daunting.

L u t e r a n recommends starting in a m o r e manageable place, like closets and k i t c h e n cupboards. “It’s best to start in a relatively easy place, so you see Luteran some progress,’’ Luteran says. “Just start chipping away at it. You get better as you do it.

“Don’t start with the things that are the most sentimental,’’ she adds.

“Those are the hardest. Work up to it.’’

Process/methods U s e b o x e s m a r k e d “ s a v e , ’’ “donate/sell’’ and “discard.’’ Be

honest and be relentless. If you haven’t used or worn something in a year or more, purge it. If you don’t have the time and energy to hold a yard/house sale or sell things on Craigslist and eBay, donate it. Think of your mission as keeping things that serve you now rather than getting rid of everything.

“Ask yourself, ‘when is the last time I used this? Does it bring value to my life? Do I love it? Do I really need it?’ If you can look at your own stuff with a little distance, it can help you get over the hump,’’ Luteran says.

One of Luteran’s favorite approaches to beating back clutter is what she calls the 5-5-30 process. Take five minutes a day to select five items to get rid of. Repeat for 30 days. At the end, you will have purged 150 items.

Schedule specific time Set specific time or times to dedicate to decluttering/downsizing.

“Give yourself a break,’’ Luteran says.

“You accumulated this stuff over many years; you’re not going to get rid of it all in a weekend. I encourage people to set appointments. Schedule a time and say, ‘I’m going to do this for two hours and then get away from it.’ ’’

Be proactive

Take action before a move, not after, and if possible, don’t wait until an emergency situation (say the death of a parent and quick sale of a home) to pare things down. If you are downsizing from a house to an apartment and know you are going to have half as many kitchen cupboards and closets and half as much overall space, trim your stuff accordingly.

Preventive maintenance Spend a few minutes each evening doing a clutter sweep of your living space, Luteran suggests. This includes things as basic as picking up newspapers and magazines, putting mail away and clearing items from kitchen counters.

If you’ve been a champion collector of clothes, books and tchotchkes, adopt a “one in, one out’’ policy. For anything new you bring home, something must go.

New Year, New Opportunities to Declutter Professional organizer Carrie Luteran is offering a three-session class, “Declutter and Keep Your Home Organized,’’ through OCM BOCES in February. The classes will be held 6:30 to 8 p.m. Feb. 12, Feb. 19 and Feb. 26. Fee: $59. To register, go to www.ocmboces.org/adulted For more information on Luteran and her organization and design services, visit www. prettyneatsolutions.com Psychotherapist Nicole Christina is the host of the “Zestful Aging’’ podcast and offers “Zestful Aging’’ webinars and online courses. For more information on Christina and her services, visit www.nicolechristina.com Luteran and Christina are collaborating on an online course that focuses on decluttering in middle age and beyond and hope to have it available in March. Check their websites for more information.

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55+

books

Marjory Allen Perez, a local historian, just published her second book, “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice! New York’s African-American Civil War Soldiers.”

Book Highlights the Lives of African-Americans from Upstate Who Fought in the Civil War The people and history of Upstate New York have been a lifelong pursuit of local historian

By Carol Radin

A

ll history is local,” according to Marjory Allen Perez — and she would know.

As historian and author for more than 45 years, Perez has examined the broad sweep of the Civil War, slavery, and 19th century African-American migration from the perspective of its personal impact on Upstate New York region.

Her latest book — “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice! New York’s African-American Civil War

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Soldiers” — is a meticulouslyresearched history of the local men who served in black regiments and the families who waited at home.

“You can tell the bigger stories through the smaller stories,” says Perez — and she does just that, through the stories of freed slaves and escaped slaves who settled in towns like Sodus Bay, Canandaigua, Camillus and Syracuse and took up the struggle between the Union and the Confederacy.

Those local African-American men served in regiments like the 54th Massachusetts (featured in the Hollywood movie, “Glory”), the 5th Massachusetts Cavalry, the Rhode Island Heavy Artillery, etc.— just three of the eight black regiments Perez documents.

For Perez, the people and history of Upstate New York have been a lifelong pursuit. She grew up in Oswego and attended undergraduate school at Buffalo

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Cover of the two books published by Marjory Allen Perez: “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice, New York’s African American Civil War Soldiers” and “Final Stop.” They are available at river’s end bookstore in Oswego; Explore Bookstore in Clifton Springs; and on amazon.com.

State and graduate school at Oswego State, where she earned an Master of Arts degree in history. Prior to graduate school, she taught history in grade school in Union Springs and in the North Syracuse School District. After completing her master’s degree, Perez was hired to be Wayne County’s historian.

It was during that time, working with historical data and records each day — and interacting with Wayne County citizens, including schoolchildren — that her passion for presenting and publishing historical material really took hold.

Her knowledge of local events grew as she did promotions for Wayne County’s sesquicentennial, coordinating school and community events like the “History Jubilee” and the “History Bowl” quiz game for children. Perez was also one of a committee of co-authors who put together a book for grade school children titled “Looking Back” for which she uncovered even more information that piqued her curiosity about the diversity of groups who called Upstate New York home, like the Erie Canal workers, the Native American population, and

the Mormons, among others.

It was also during that time that she met her husband. Being at a loss for how to put together an eye-catching brochure for sesquicentennial events, she called in a young graphic artist named George Perez, whom she later married. Over the years, he has been her greatest fan. They continue to be a team, as George creates the graphics for the covers of the books she writes. It was he who came up with the title for “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice.”

For the cover of “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice,” George combined a photo he took at Beaufort National Cemetery in South Carolina, with an overlay of an African-American soldier, in muted colors which evoke, to this reader, a past rediscovered.

One day at a history celebration for the Wayne County, a child asked Perez, “Were there any black people here before the Civil War?” At that moment, as Perez describes it, she knew she had to “tell the stories that have not been told.”

In full historian methodical mode, she determined to dig into all available research on the African-American population in

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early New York. In frequent visits to Washington D.C. to visit her son, she spent days on end in the National Archives, digging through reports of pension files, military movements, news articles and old letters.

Concentrating on original documents from the pre-Civil War and Civil War period, she found herself working on two different strands, the Underground Railroad and the Civil War’s black regiments. In fact, Perez worked on two books at one time.

She wrote four essays which would become chapters for “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice,” and then put the project on hold while she completed what would be her first published book: “Final Stop, Freedom!” about the Underground Railroad Experience in Wayne County.

Created with material from her many presentations and programs as county historian, Perez’s “Final Stop: Freedom” divides the Underground Railroad experience into eras that cover the oppression of slavery, the escape to freedom and the reestablishment of new lives in the north. Each era is illustrated with old photos and personal stories from the AfricanAmerican communities of the time, gleaned from original letters, news articles, and autobiographies.

Having a book published gave Perez renewed confidence. “The fact that I could do it and finish gave me the courage to go on with the book about the soldiers,” Perez said. By that time, the National Archives had digitized its documents for online

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access, so Perez found she could order materials and review primary research at home rather than in Washington. From the considerable data and records she examined, Perez identified 500 members of black regiments, African-Americans from Upstate New York who had either enlisted or been drafted. In “Freedom: A Shared Sacrifice”, she brings them to life with names, hometowns, occupations, wives and children, mothers and fathers, even uncles and nephews who also fought.

“I wanted people to care,” Perez said. Thus compelled, she set out to describe the contributions these soldiers made — and the losses they suffered. One such story is that of Benjamin Jupiter, an Ontario County resident from a “close-knit family that had lived in the area for 40 years.” Jupiter’s military service took him to South Carolina, where he got sick but recovered and was promoted to chief nurse and assistant steward at the regimental hospital.

Unfortunately, other members of his family did not fare as well. His younger brother died of disease in the army, and his nephew was killed in action in Darbytown, Vt. Much more of Jupiter’s life story is recounted through letters to pension examiners from his wife and from a friend in neighboring Geneva.

Another story is that of Thomas Riggs, who lived in Canada, crossed the Niagara River to Buffalo in 1863 looking for work, and enlisted in the 54th Massachusetts Regiment.

Unfortunately, Riggs died in the Battle of Wagner; however, the reader gains a glimpse into his family, particularly his mother, in the records and letters that Perez discovered.

Why is it that these stories of Benjamin Jupiter, Thomas Riggs, and the many other soldiers and families about whom Perez writes have a compelling appeal beyond Upstate New York? “This experience was replicated everywhere,” Perez said, noting that these are universal stories of migration, military struggle, and re-establishing lives. For Perez, those life-changing experiences embodied the “shared sacrifice” of her title, and her book helps readers to understand that “the shared sacrifice of white and black soldiers, of men and their families” happened very close to home.

golden years

By Harold Miller Email: hmiller@mcsmms.com

Jack Bisgrove

Businessman, entrepreneur, philanthropist, mentor, friend

C

entral New York will surely miss the lifelong philanthropic efforts of Jack Bisgrove, who prematurely died of cancer in November. He was 78.

He was dedicated to his hometown of Auburn and lived here all of his life.

His father, John Bisgrove Sr., began a humble business in Auburn at the turn of the 20th century — carting fruits and vegetables from door to door. Eventually his efforts led to the founding of Red Star Express Lines, which grew to be the largest regional trucking company in the country.

When Bisgrove Sr. retired he turned the business over to his sons Jack and Jerry, who continued to build and expand the business until they retired, at which time they sold Red Star to TNT, one of the largest transport companies in the world.

At this juncture the Bisgrove boys vowed to use their fortunes to rebuild Auburn to its former standing as one of the finest communities in which to live and work. Auburn, at the early part of the 20th century, was an industrial boom town with such companies as Columbian Rope, International Harvester, American Locomotive, Firth Carpet and General Electrical headquartering here. As time went on, Auburn fell victim to the same plague as other cities along the rust belt: high taxes, high utility rates and union problems. Eventually Auburn lost its manufacturing base as well other business that supported them.

Jack Bisgrove founded The Stardust Foundation in 2007 (thus named for the financial dust that accumulated from the sale of Red Star). The Bisgrove brothers pledged $15 million to support community organizations for health care, youth care, arts and architecture and many other functions for the purpose of improving the quality of life in Auburn and Cayuga County. I was

honored to be a part of that dynamic philanthropic organization. At the center of foundation’s work stands the “Creative Corridor” — the renovation of abandoned buildings and other eyesores along the main streets of downtown into charming blocks of shops, stores and offices, which melds the Auburn of yesteryear into the functionality of today. The anchor of the Creative Corridor is the 88-room Hilton Gardens Hotel and Conference Center — championed by Jack and built by Michael Falcone — another native Auburnian and member of the Stardust Foundation.

Another major development built

by Jack Bisgrove — in honor of his son, Brian, who succumbed to cancer in 1996 — is Everest Park, a 160-acre complex of rolling hills, athletic fields and wooded trails high on a hillside overlooking Owasco Lake. Five large lacrosse / soccer play fields sit atop this tranquil site. Each of these play fields is a memorial to athletic champions

of Cayuga County – one of which is my son Ron. The development that Jack was most proud of and where he spent his final days was Martin Point on Owasco Lake, which he partnered with myself and Al Bouley, a fellow businessman and developer. He spent his final days sitting on his veranda overlooking the lake. You could find him most mornings at 6:30 reading the newspapers. He was a voracious reader and kept up with all that was happening in Auburn and America — both of which he loved.

There are only a handful of people who have profoundly influenced my life and career — Jack Bisgrove was at the top of the list. He is the only man I have ever known who could walk the narrow line between living a highly religious life while at the same time being a hard-core businessman. His stamp will forever be emblazoned on our beloved Finger Lakes region.

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55+

soccer

Getting His Kicks Soccer legend Dean Foti gives back to the sport he cherishes

By Mary Beth Roach

D

ean Foti has been involved in soccer ever since he was a young boy growing up in Oneonta.

Since then, the 57-year-old has spent his entire adult life training new generations of players.

Over the years, Foti has played the game on the college level, coached, trained and raised three soccer players.

Now as technical director of the New York West Youth Soccer Association, Foti has a number of responsibilities, including overseeing the organization’s Olympic development program, coaching and educating other coaches

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in the program.

The NYWYSA covers the part of the state from I-81 westward and from the Watertown area to points south that include Binghamton, Corning and Elmira. While its state office is headquartered in Rochester, Foti conducts many of his programs at the CNY Family Sports Centre in Baldwinsville, but still does an extensive amount of traveling.

When Foti was a kid in Oneonta, the town’s two colleges, SUNY Oneonta and Hartwick College, were powerhouses in soccer. At the time, both colleges were Division I and had

national reputations in the sport.

“In a town of 20,000 people, that was the thing to do. All the kids there grew up wanting to play the sports that the colleges played,” he said.

Foti went on to play soccer at Syracuse University on a scholarship, and he earned a bachelor ’s degree in marketing. He became a graduate assistant coach at SU, enabling him to get his master’s degree in exercise physiology.

From there, he became a fulltime assistant coach at the University of Maryland, returned to Syracuse University as the head coach of the

men’s soccer team. In November of 2009, then-SU athletic director Daryl Gross let Foti go from that position, and news reports at the time indicated that Gross had wanted to make a change in the leadership of the men’s soccer program. Eventually Foti became associated with the New York West Youth Soccer Association, NYWYSA. The organization’s mission as part of U.S youth soccer is to continue to bring youth into the game, he said.

So often these days, a lot of kids are opting out of participating in any sports and are spending time in front of a computer screen, he added.

Foti, like his colleagues in NYWYSA and other youth soccer organizations, is trying to change that mindset and encourage them to become involved.

“It’s an easy sport to fall in love with because all you need is a soccer ball. In our sport, the ball is the motivator. If you give any kid a soccer ball, they can amuse themselves,” he said. “You give a kid a ball, and he’ll start hitting it against a wall or start shooting it at a goal.”

“It’s amazing with the imagination of kids, if you just give them a ball and an area to play, what they come up with. It may or may not be soccer, but it’ll be something with a ball that they’re kicking around. It’s one of the universal things about the sport that seems to attract people to playing,” he added.

Calling it the “world’s game,” Foti said its popularity has gone through the roof, and he attributed that to several factors. With today’s technology, access to cable stations and the internet, people are increasingly exposed to it. They can watch games broadcast from anywhere in the world.

Also, there are now several generations of soccer players, so parents who may have played in their youth are now bringing their children into the sport. The popularity of the U.S. men’s and women’s national teams has also helped to grow the sport among young people.

Foti cited soccer stars, like Mia Hamm, Olympic gold medalist and

FIFA Women’s World Cup champion, for bringing so much attention to women’s soccer and making it so popular.

“Now, the young girls that are growing up have mentors and people to emulate,” he added.

Changing landscape His work with NYWYSA has developed in the eight years he’s been with the program and has adapted to the times.

“The landscape has changed a lot, so now it’s not just about being out on the field and playing or teaching coaches how to coach,” he said. “A lot of it has to do with creating a safe environment for a player, whether it means by virtue of the methodology in which you’re teaching the game, or by the risk management you do.”

With the end game being player safety, there are a great many issues with which these youth organizations are contending.

For example, the organization makes sure there’s a vetting process whereby anyone who might deal with a child — a coach, manager, club administrator or referee — have background checks done on them.

Others include putting safety protocols in place; determining when a child might be too young to participate; how much practice is too much; development versus the always-needto-win mentality; and helping parents find the best place to start their child in the sport and which avenues to pursue as their child progresses.

It’s the development of the player that seems to give Foti the greatest satisfaction in his work.

“I think the biggest part of it for me is watching kids going from point A to point B, whatever that should happen to be, in terms of getting better as a player,” he noted. “As a college coach, it was neat to see how a kid would progress throughout the course of four years. This is even better because you look at kids who start out in our young academy.”

Development versus winning With younger players in academies, winning is not that important, he said.

This may sound odd coming from a former player and coach. But he explained that on the college level, the players, while they may still be developing to a degree, have already learned the fundamentals so there’s more attention on winning.

“The window for development is in those formative years,” he said.

While winning in the early years is a factor, in some cases, it impedes development.

“How do we not impose adult values on youth sports?,” he asked rhetorically. “That comes into play a lot with winning and losing versus development. It doesn’t matter if you win or lose. At this point in the race, that’s irrelevant.”

Foti has been in the position of a coach and parent, but he’s been mindful never to mix the two roles.

His three daughters — Riley and twins Lainey and Sophia — all played soccer.

They began with East Side Soccer in Syracuse’s Barry Park, before moving on to the Syracuse Fusion soccer club and the Jamesville-Dewitt High School team. The three are in college now, with two still playing the sport.

While he has helped train his daughters’ teams and shared knowledge with them, he didn’t coach them on purpose. He didn’t want to get caught up with making the decisions of who plays, who doesn’t, and how much time each player gets, he said.

If his daughters ever asked their father’s opinion of a coach’s request, Foti said he always sided with the coaches.

Otherwise, it “creates discord within the team. It doesn’t lend itself to team unity and common thinking of a group,” he said.

That team unity, working toward a common goal and discipline are not only attributes that Foti has taught his daughters. They are lessons that he believes soccer, like any sport, can teach to new generations of players.

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life after 55

By Michele Reed michele@cny55.com

Photos by Bill Reed

Silk Workers’ Brains and Other Culinary Delights Enjoying the food in the city of Lyon, France’s gastronomic capital

B

ill and I ate silk workers’ brains and they were delicious! Don’t worry, we’re not zombies. We were enjoying cervelle de canut, one of the culinary delights of the city of Lyon, France’s gastronomic capital.

Situated between the butter-loving regions of Alsace and Lorraine to the north and the vegetable and olive oil-based cuisines of Provence and the Mediterranean, Lyon melded the two to create its own rich heritage of French cookery.

Silk workers’ brains, despite its gruesome name, is actually a simple and delightful treat: soft white cheese mixed with white wine, a little milk and herbs. Think sour cream and chive dip with a French accent. It’s served in a little bowl and you dip small pieces of crusty baguette to scoop out bitesized portions of the “brains.” The name refers to Lyons’ major industry until the 1930s, silk making. At its height, the silk trade employed more than 90,000 workers and they needed a simple, portable lunch to take with them.

In addition to the brains, Bill and I tasted other staples of the silk workers’ lunch pail, a ham-salad-like concoction of tripe in a sauce like vinegary mayonnaise with bits of pickle (we didn’t love it), and rosette de Lyon, a spicy, cured sausage made of leg of pork, and Lyon’s most famous sausage (we did love it).

We topped it all off with tarte praline, but this is not your grandmother’s praline pie, that gooey Thanksgiving staple full of pecans and brown sugar.

When the server brought it to our table, I did a double take. This pie was pink — bright pink. Fuchsia. I called back the waitress and asked what was in it.

“Pralines,” she answered a little slowly and emphasizing each syllable, as one

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would to a very small child. “What makes it pink?” I pressed on. “Is it raspberry?” She gave a Gallic shrug.

“Pralines,” she repeated, apologizing for her lack of English to explain. It tasted delicious, so I finished every morsel, and looked up the recipe on the internet when I returned home.

Pralines, the signature candy of Lyon, are almonds coated in multiple layers of pink sugary syrup. They are a traditional treat on their own, but for

the pie, they are ground up and boiled with cream to make the pie filling.

The most famous type of restaurant in Lyon are the bouchons, tiny, familyrun restaurants noted for serving traditional Lyonnaise cuisine and having a friendly, lively atmosphere.

Lucky for us, our hotel was three blocks away from a hotbed of bouchon culture, the rue des Marronniers, or Chestnut Tree Street. There we had our first meal in Lyon, a three-course lunch,

The Laurencin is a bouchon in Lyon’s Old Quarter, serving traditional Lyonnaise dishes. It’s where we ate silk workers’ brains.

For little more than the cost of the coffee itself, you can treat yourself to tiny desserts that accompany the savory brew. One evening, my espresso came with an assortment of, clockwise from back left, house-made chocolate mousse, a cream puff stuffed with vanilla ice cream and topped with chocolate sauce, freshly whipped cream and a petite tiramisu.

A signature Lyonnaise dessert is pink praline pie. Sugar-coated almond candies are ground up and boiled with milk to make a rich filling for a flaky crust. As if that weren’t rich enough, mine was served with housemade French vanilla ice cream. enjoyed in the company of a Swiss lady who invited us to share her table. She had been traveling by train between Italy and her home in Geneva, and took advantage of a layover for lunch at this particular restaurant, which she had been visiting for 40-plus years. The entrée, or first course, was gateau foie de vollaille, chicken livers baked into a tiny, cushiony cake and swimming in a savory tomato sauce. The main course was tender baked fish in a butter herb sauce with piped mashed potatoes and a fluffy egg dish made with zucchini.

Dessert was soft white cheeses enjoyed with baguette. We savored the meal with a pot Lyonnaise or half-bottle of rosé wine.

The pot Lyonnaise is another invention that harkens back to the silk trade. The bosses were required by law to provide 50 cl, or a half-liter of wine per worker each day. They created a bottle with a very thick glass base, which results in a serving of only 46 cl.

This way, the boss could take a liter of wine and fill two pots and have a glass left over for himself. All this bounty, three-course meal for two with wine, cost only 37 euros or about $42.

It’s not all silk worker’s brains and bouchons in Lyon. The city didn’t earn the title of gastronomic capital of France only for its simple, rustic fare. The city was the birthplace of chef Paul Bocuse, one of Lyon’s most famous sons. The three-star Michelin chef was one of the pioneers of nouvelle cuisine, a modern, lighter version of French cookery. According to legend, it debuted when Bocuse and two other chefs created the menu for the maiden voyage of the Concorde in 1969. When he died in January of 2018 at the age of 91, all of France mourned and hundreds of chefs in their white coats attended his funeral in Lyon’s cathedral.

The chef founded the Institut

Paul Bocuse in Lyon, which teaches culinary arts and hotel management to students from all over the world.

The institute restaurant was a couple of blocks from our hotel, so we peeked in, considering dinner on our last night in the city. With its contemporary décor designed by Pierre-Yves Rochon, it looked as elegant as the dishes being prepared by the student chefs. But with three-course dinners running at the equivalent of $60 per person, we decided to save the experience for a future visit.

With a newfound taste for silk workers’ brains and the other culinary masterpieces of Lyon, we knew we’d be back someday.

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druger’s zoo

By Marvin Druger Email: mdruger@syr.edu

T

Beyond 65 Plus: Observations on Growing Older

he over 65 generation has lived a long time and have learned how to cope with life from a large variety of experiences, good and bad. We do learn from everything we do and everything we do becomes part of what we are. The wisdom of older age is often lost onthe younger generation, and younger people do not appreciate or respect that wisdom. I think of the famous quote by the late TV journalist Tim Russert: “The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get.”

It is not uncommon for younger people to reinvent the wheel. A brilliant new venture is proposed in the workplace, but nobody except the older folks seems to know that this project has already been tried and it failed. Instead of acknowledging this truth, and revising the project accordingly, the failed plan is often reinstituted without any consideration as to why the plan failed years before.

One of my mottos is, “Remember the past when planning the future.”

Consultation with older, experienced individuals before plunging into the abyss could help a project be revised and succeed the second time.

Everyone is unique and is the product of life experiences interacting with a unique genotype. I always argue that you can be taller, richer, smarter, etc., but nobody is better than anyone else. Each of us has our own unique talents and weaknesses.

Because people over 65 have had more life experiences than younger individuals, they have more wisdom. The challenge

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is to use this wisdom in constructive, meaningful ways.

A good feature of growing older is that we can recognize our strengths and weakness and make changes in a positive direction. No matter where we go, we have to take ourselves with us. So, we have to like ourselves and adjust to ourselves. Here is a poem I wrote that is from my book, “Strange Creatures and Other Poems.”

Myself Once in a while When I have a bad day, I want to escape To a land far away.

But I can’t really escape, That’s something I know, ‘Cause I take myself with me Wherever I go.

So, I have to like me And like what I do, Then I can feel happy, And live life better too.

As unique individuals, we all have our idiosyncrasies. One of my traits is to talk a lot. I go to Metro

Fitness in Fayetteville regularly to exercise my mouth as well as my body. My tendency to talk so much can be annoying to others. Indeed, the final words to me from my deceased wife, Pat, were, “Marvin, shut up!”

Also, I tend to mostly talk about myself. After all, I know more about myself than I know about anything else. This tendency to talk mostly about oneself is not uncommon. I once gave an assignment to a small group of students to eavesdrop on a conversation between any two people.

My view was confirmed.

“I have a bad pain in my foot” — Reply: “You should hear about the pain in my foot.” “I. I. I. me. me. me” is the common mode of conversation.

I have discovered that everyone loves a good listener, not a talker. I actually attended a workshop to learn how to be an active listener. Unfortunately, it didn’t work, but I recognize this flaw in my behavior and I sometimes try to make adjustments. I once told a student, “I talk too much.” The student’s response was, “But you have a lot to say.” This student got an A in my course.

As I grow older, I have become more aware of being friendly, courteous, kind and nice to others. If I’m lost or need help, I never hesitate to ask someone for help. Even the most grim-faced individual turns out to be friendly and accommodating.

If someone helps me, I usually give them a small magnifier in a plastic sleeve, with my caricature and contact information on the sleeve. Nowadays, when I meet people on the street, they often don’t say “hello.” Instead, they know what is coming and they say, “No thanks, I already have one magnifier … or two ... or three.”

The magnifier idea came about many years ago. I approached a student in my biology class who didn’t seem to be paying attention. I said, “John. Why aren’t you taking notes?”

“He replied, “I’m drawing pictures of you.” “Great. Can I keep it?” John gave me written permission to use it as my logo, and I have done so ever since.

The caricature has served as a pathway to gratitude and friendship in many instances. It has appeared on T-shirts, books, bumper stickers, caps, posters and many other miscellaneous items.

One lady even had the caricature put on her pillowcase. I asked her why and she replied, So that I can say, “I slept with Marvin.”

As I age, I have noticed that people seem much more courteous and respectful. Once, an old lady offered me a seat on a crowded bus. (Of course, I refused the offer.) Teenagers have held doors open for me and almost everyone now calls me “Sir.” I once had a conversation with the then president of the National Organization for Women (NOW). I argued that a man opening a door for a woman was a courtesy, not an implication that they were not strong enough to do so. She said, “Has any woman ever opened a door for you?” “Well, No” I replied. “Let’s try it,” she said. She then opened the door for me and I walked through it. “How was that?” she asked. “Wonderful,” I said, “Let’s do it again!”

Our reward for growing older is the senior discount. Several times, I have forgotten to ask for the discount, but they gave it to me without asking.

We should always ask for a senior discount, even if it is not advertised.

On one occasion, I complained that there was no senior discount. The proprietor replied, “I charge more for seniors.” Actually, it is often the seniors who can afford to pay the full price, while a younger, struggling individual cannot. It might be better to have junior discounts Being nice and courteous to older

A small magnifier in a plastic sleeve with Marvin Druger’s caricature and contact information on the sleeve.

The author has given hundreds of magnifiers to people with whom he interacts. people seems to be more prevalent in our society. A few years ago, near Thanksgiving, I was having coffee with a professional colleague in a café. I was well-dressed and wore a sports jacket and tie. An attractive African-American lady purchased something at the store counter. Then, she walked by our table and gave me a $5 bill. “Have a happy Thanksgiving,” she said. I stared at her in disbelief.

She repeated “Have a very happy Thanksgiving.” And she walked out of the store. I framed the $5 bill. It reminds me to be kind to everyone I meet.

I am now enjoying the luxury of being treated like an older person. I smile when someone older than me holds open a door for me. I enjoy being called sir. It’s like being knighted.

I like when my grandchildren dote over me. “Grandpa, I’ll carry your bag.” Or “I’ll get you a glass of water.”

When we went on a family trip, my granddaughter hooked my arm and became my escort. I like being called virtually every night by my children and grandchildren. They share the deep loneliness I feel from losing my dear wife, Pat, several years ago.

Before Pat even became ill from lung cancer, we agreed that, if one of us should die, the other should go on and live life as fully as possible. I was fortunate enough to meet a lovely woman, Victoria, to share my life. I will never marry again, but Victoria and I

travel together and share each other’s company. Victoria is many years younger than me. She told her friend about our age difference and her friend asked, “Do you spend all your time taking him to doctors’ appointments?”

The older I get, the greater the need for humor.

As we age, there is also a need for regular exercise. Bodily functions deteriorate as we age, but, if we exercise regularly, they decline more slowly. A friend of mine told me that he hates exercise. He told me that, whenever he gets the urge to exercise, he lies down until the urge goes away.

I find that exercise provides mental as well as physical benefits, especially as we grow older. I jokingly tell people that it’s not the exercise that’s good for you. It’s the shower. Pretend to exercise, then take a shower, and you’ll feel great. Don’t believe it? Keep exercising.

One of the greatest barriers to doing regular exercise is the lack of motivation. It’s too easy not to do exercise. My motivation traces back to a colleague at Syracuse University. He taught me how to play squash and we went to the squash courts every day at noon for about a month. Finally, I said, “This this ridiculous. How do you find time to do this every day?” He replied, “You find time to eat lunch, don’t you?” Lesson learned for a lifetime.

Older people tend to become grouchy, argumentative and less sensitive to insults. What you say can’t really hurt me. Who cares? Most of the time, insults are not intentional, but the words may hit a sore spot in our psyche. It’s good to put the insult in perspective. When our feelings are hurt by someone’s words, my advice is to just let it go. People are dying in nursing homes — the insult can’t really be that important.

On the other hand, we should be careful about not insulting anyone with unkind words. When words leave our mouths, we cannot take them back again. So, it’s a good idea to let words be processed by your brain before they leave your mouth.

The thoughts about aging that I have expressed above hold true for many older and younger individuals.

Instead of complaining and moaning and groaning, we should enjoy our life experiences and laugh as much as we can.

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55+

visits

By Sandra Scott

Artwork at Phoenix Art Museum depicting the annual migration of monarch butterfly from Canada to Mexico.

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P

Things to Do in Phoenix/Scottsdale

hoenix and Scottsdale in Arizona are equal distance from the Phoenix airport so deciding where to stay can be a difficult decision. Scottsdale is a more relaxed location with a wonderful historic district while Phoenix is a more vibrant city. Each location has important sites within their city but many of the must-visit sites are located between the two cities. The area is popular with snow birds so there are many condos and hotels and RV parks; so, for a week or for the winter, visitors will find something to enjoy.

Here are 10 great things to do in the region:

1.

Musical Instrument Museum — “Music is the language of the soul” and something everyone can enjoy regardless of their culture.

The museum’s Geographic Gallery is a trip around the world through music with tableaus that feature the musical instruments of an area plus the clothing and other artifacts. Most vignettes include a video of groups playing their instruments in native 48

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apparel. There are more than 6,800 instruments on display.

2.

Taliesin — Taliesin means the “brow” of the mountain. Frank Lloyd Wright’s beloved winter home fits that definition. “Taliesin West is a look over the rim of the world,” wrote Wright. It is a national historic landmark nestled in the desert foothills of the McDowell Mountains in Scottsdale. It is also the home of the Frank Lloyd Wright Foundation and the School of Architecture at Taliesin.

It is more than Wright’s home, is it also a museum and a school of architecture.

Wright became enamored with Asian art so there are many Asian art objects throughout the house.

3.

Phoenix Art Museum — The walls and ceilings of the museum’s entrance are covered by Carlos Amoralas’ artwork called “Black Cloud,” a “plaque of 25,000 black paper moths and butterflies” meant to represent the annual migration of the monarch butterfly from Canada to Mexico.

Al

exander Calder may be best known for his mobiles but his art work is a burst of color resembling his mobiles. There is a fascinating art display of “paintings” that have moving characters obviously based on video games.

4.

Heard Museum — Entering the “Native People of the Southwest” at the Heard Museum there is a 30-foot-long glass/clay art fence with many hidden images in the sculptures.

The Heard has one of the largest collections of kachina dolls that are representations of a Pueblo ancestral spirit. The museum has changing exhibits and lectures along with unique offerings such as yoga classes.

On its First Friday evenings visitors can enjoy fun, food, drinks with free general admission to the museum’s galleries.

5.

OdySea Aquarium — The aquarium is the largest marine aquarium in the Southwest. There are more than 30,000 animals. The aquarium offers educational, interactive, and entertaining experiences for the entire family. There are a couple hands-on stations such as the sturgeon and stingray touch pools. Certified guides lead visitors into an underwater environment with marine life from

the Indo-Pacific region. A Living Sea Carousel which takes guests through the Open Ocean, Sea Turtle, Sea Lion/ Seal and Shark exhibits.

6.

Western Spirit — Western Spirit: Scottsdale Museum of the West is a Smithsonian affiliate located in Old Town. Beside a fine display of Western artwork they have a wonderful collection of Hopi pottery that spans six centuries. The Abe Hays Family “Spirit of the West Collection” of saddles, spurs, badges, and clothing is extensive. Check out the sculpture garden and see if there are any theatrical shows playing in their theater.

7.

Desert Botanical Garden — At the entrance to the gardens there is a Chihuly glass sculpture but there are also unique sculptures scattered throughout the gardens. Walk the trails. During the blooming season, the desert wildflowers and cacti are an explosion of color. Hike the Sonoran Desert Trail for a great view of the mountains that surround the gardens and Phoenix. Docents were available to answer questions and give demonstrations. Try to visit the Desert Botanical Garden around Christmas time in the evening when 8,000 luminaries are lit.

Desert Botanical Garden in Phoenix.

8.

Pueblo Grande— Pueblo Grande Ruin, a National Historic Landmark, is a large prehistoric Hohokam Indian village site that was continuously occupied between 100 and 1450 AD and was heavily influenced by contacts with Mexico.

The museum contains exhibits on the Hohokam people. There are free interactive programs on the third Sunday of the month. Take a class, join a workshop, or take a tour. Check out their annual event that range from a lecture series to Navajo Rug and American Indian Art Auction to Gourd Dancing.

9.

Arcosanti — Arcosanti, a projected experimental town about 70 miles north of Phoenix, is worth the drive for those who are interested in acrology, the concept of merging architectural and ecological principles designed for buildings in densely populate areas. The brain child of Paolo Soleri, Arcosanti began in 1970 as an experiential learning center with

Taliesin is Frank Lloyd Wright’s beloved winter home in the desert foothills of the McDowell Mountains in Scottsdale. walk-through demonstrations of how to pursue alternatives to urban sprawl while saving resources and improving the quality of life for all.

10.

Wind Talkers — Check out the Wind Talkers memorial honoring the Navajos who gained fame as Wind Talkers during World War II when, by using the complex Navajo language, they were able

to communicate messages for the allied forces without the Japanese understanding the messages.

Ro Ho En, the Japanese Friendship Garden of Phoenix — It includes a tea garden and tea house in its 3.5 acres. The famed Biltmore Hotel is where Irving Berlin wrote “I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas” while he was sitting in the sun around the hotel’s pool.

11.

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last page Sen. John DeFrancisco, 72

By Mary Beth Roach

Getting ready for a new phase of his life — after 41 years in politics Q: So, you’ve retired from politics after 41 years. What’s next?

A: I don’t know. My objective was to basically spend some time down south and try to make decisions what, if anything, I want to do. It could be playing tennis and golf or it could be getting back into the practice of law at some point — or it could be consulting work. I’m really in no hurry. I’ve been running 100 miles per hour for many, many years. So now, I just want to, before I jump into something else, make sure its’s the right thing to do.

We’re definitely going to travel more.

Q: Do you and your wife, Linda, have a “bucket list”?

A: We haven’t sat down and thought of one, but it’s interesting you mention

that concept because my daughter [Jennifer] was actually in the movie “The Bucket List.” My wife and I have been married 50 years now.

About a year-and-a-half ago, we went for 10 days to Italy, went back to the villages that her grandfather and my grandfather came from. Jenny’s out in LA, and we haven’t been out there in a while. We might get back to Europe as well and go to places we haven’t gone.

Q: In all your years of public service, what do you consider your biggest accomplishment?

A: There’s many things I can point to, but specifically, I think what I tried to do — and I think my longevity was because of that — I always said what was on my mind. I always tried to analyze things and, once I made a decision which I thought would be best, I stuck to it. I think over time, people recognized that I may not agree with them all the time, but they knew all the time where I stood, as opposed to putting my finger to the air to figure what way the wind was blowing.

Q: Was there one thing you wish you had accomplished and didn’t for whatever reason.

A: Yeah, I would have loved to have gotten the nomination and beaten Andrew Cuomo.

Q: Did you have a mentor?

A. From a political standpoint, one of the guys I respected the most was Joe Bruno, when he was the Senate leader.

Joe was a tough guy, very personable guy that I think stuck to his guns in many, many instances. I think that he, early on, despite of being wrongfully charged, in my mind, and going through two trials, costing him millions of dollars to maintain his innocence. He was ultimately acquitted of all charges. The fact that he had that kind of fortitude to stick to his guns. Most anybody else would have pled to a lesser charge.

Q: What is the one thing that might surprise people to learn about you?

A: I think a lot of people think I’m a pretty tough guy. Intractable in some ways. I stick to what I think but before I get to that point I listen to all sides of an issue. I’ve taken positions that people got surprised about.

Q: What would you like your legacy to be?

A: When I first ran 41 years ago, I didn’t know what I was doing with respect to politics. I knew nobody.

When I went around, everybody knew my family. They knew my mother, they knew my father. Everywhere I went, ‘Oh, you’re Frank’s son. What a wonderful guy! Oh, your mother is the sweetest lady I ever met.’ It was unbelievable to me the reputation that they had in the community. That’s what I hope the legacy is — that people may not say that DeFrancisco is the sweetest person they ever met, but they have respect for me that translates down to my kids and grandkids; that at least they said, ‘He did a good job.

I didn’t always agree with him, but he was a straight shooter. He did a good job over the many years he was in office.’

After 41 years in politics — 15 at the local level and 26 in the New York State Senate — John DeFrancisco stepped down at the end of 2018.

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YOUR CONCUSSION

EXPERTS

CLAUDINE WARD, MD, MEDICAL DIRECTOR AND PATIENT

Older adults are more likely to sustain injury from falls --- especially in the colder months with snow and ice under foot. A fall can result in a concussion, even if you don't hit your head. Common symptoms of concussion include headache, dizziness and memory problems. Most people recover from concussion in a week or two, but when symptoms last longer, ask for the experts. The Upstate Concussion Center provides comprehensive evaluation and treatment services for concussion and sports concussion.

315.464.8986

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WWW.UPSTATE.EDU/CONCUSSION

Winter can be fun!

Stay healthy and current, reconnect with a passion or try something new.

Join us today!

Oasis is an age 50+ community learning center offering classes in arts and humanities, technology, health and fitness, personal enrichment, science, travel and more.

Syracuse Oasis

Start any time. Single and multi-session classes range from free to low-cost. Easy access and free parking. Located next to the DoubleTree Hotel.

315-464-6555

See our winter/spring catalog: www.oasisnet.org/syracuse OASIS, 6333 State Rte 298, East Syracuse, NY 13057