20XXtheMagazine - Spring Issue 2020

SPRING ISSUE 2020

COVID 19: N OT INFECTED, BUT AFFECTED

Is social distancing actually bringing us closer together?

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CONTENTS 12 Affected But Not Infected Short stories from our community regarding COVID-19

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MEET THE CEO

For the Culture

Check out our interview with USC’s Coach Dawn Staley

Tacara LaStacia speaks on navigating her first publication

58 Spotlight

Learn how to balance work and play with Tameika Isaac Devine 20XXtheMagazine.com | 5

Visit 20XXtheMagazine.com to stay up to date on new content for the culture!

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CONTENTS Beauty & Fashion

28 Fashion Spotlights

We dive deep into 3 designers and what propelled them into their careers

39 Best Black Owned Makeup Brands Top notch quality and prices that you can’t beat

40 Thrifting 101

Tiffany J shows us how to properly thrift to get the most out of our experience

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Health & Wealth 53

The Mental Health Tip Kendra Talley talks about destigmatizing mental health in the community

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First Time Home Buying Realtor Ebony Harris shares with us the ins and outs of buying your first home

Sanity Tips for Moms Marie-Kritz Beltron gives tips on how to stay sane during quarantine with kids in the house

Lifestyle

43 RIF Book List Check out our top 15 must reads

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45 Top 5 Podcasts Hosted by Black Women Grab your phone or tablet and add these dope podcasts to your library

46 Cooking w/ Auntie Loren

Viral TitToking sensation Auntie Loren tells us how she got started in the kitchen

CEO | EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Tacara LaStacia VP | CREATIVE DIRECTOR Keya Talley EDITOR Bink Carpenter LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST/BLOGGER Chelsey Blasingame Taylon Moorer HEALTH & WELLNESS COLUMNIST Kendra Talley Marie-Kriz Beltran BRAND AMBASSADOR MoniQue La’Belle

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C O N T R I BU TO R S Taylon Moorer LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST/ BLOGGER Taylon is an experienced entertainment and lifestyle blogger/vlogger. She also curates videos to inspire millennials everywhere.

Chelsea Blassingame LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST/ BLOGGER Chelsea curates videos to help inspire young women everywhere to lead a mentally and physically healthy lifestyle.

Tacara LaStacia CEO | EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Tacara LaStacia is a graduate of the University of South Carolina with a degree in Journalism and Mass Communications.

20XXtheMagazine is her way of giving back to the culture and inspiring millions of women of color around the world.

Kendra Talley HEALTH & WELLNESS COLUMNIST Kendra obatined her Masters of Science in Community Psychology from Florida A&M University. She’s passionate about normalizing and dicussing mental health in the black community.

Keya Talley VP | CREATIVE DIRECTOR Keya graduated from the University of South Carolina with a degree in Journalism and Mass Communications.

She has a passion for all things design and anything creative.

Bink Carpenter EDITOR

Marie-Kriz Beltran HEALTH & WELLNESS COLUMNIST Marie has her Masters of Arts in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Colorado Christian University. She enjoys spreading knowledge about the importance of mental health.

Bink has a passion for inspiring other young girls her age to go after what they want in life and to dream big! She also oversees 20XXGirls!

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MoniQue LaBelle BRAND AMBASSADOR MoniQue is a cosmetologist, business owner, model, and brand ambassador. She has a passion for giving back to her community through public speaking engagements as well.

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Photographer: Aaron Smalls Photography

EDITOR’S LETTER

20XX IS MY YEAR Since last summer, I was optimistic---more like ecstatic to be honest---about all that I was anticipating to take place in 2020. For starters, I was turning 40! That in itself is still awkward when it rolls off my tongue. (Thank God, Black Don’t Crack and I don’t look like what I’ve been through!) I often say I grew up at 39, so turning 40 was like turning 21 for me. I finally felt grown enough to do whatever I wanted and answer to noone-but God of course. 40 was supposed to be my “all I gotta do is stay black and die” year. The year when I could say “Lie” in front of my mama and grandma without nearly getting whiplash from flinching so hard out of fear. I told myself that AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE FEAR IS NOT AN OPTION. Then the bottom seemingly fell out.

January started what appeared to be a downward slope and I was quickly falling. From relationship woes to health issues, to setback after setback with the magazine to death and even Covid-19 (affectionately known in our community as Rona). The first five months of 2020 seemingly consisted of nothing but gloom and doom. I remember seeing a social media post saying “Is 2020 still yall’s year?” I didn’t respond on the post but my response then, and still today is a resounding YES! On the surface, there is nothing good that has been produced from the fruits of this year, but for me it has been the exact opposite. I count it a blessing to be able to say that my household has not been directly affected by any of this years’ “distractions”. Even though I became a homeschool teacher, while still working my full time job from home, continuing to build my brand and launch this publication---I appreciate the opportunity of still being able to work and bring in income. I appreciate the quality time that I get to spend with my almost 10 year old daughter, who has become a great assistant and budding chef. Even though we aren’t allowed to go inside my grandmother’s home due to her “high risk” classification for Covid-19, I am grateful that I am still able to visit her from the front yard and still speak with her on the telephone. And even though we set out to give birth to 20XXtheMagazine in January 2020, but our first issue did not become available until May 2020, I am grateful to be surrounded by a team of women who did not let me get discouraged and quit. Keya, Danyell, and even my Binky: 20XX IS OUR YEAR! I set 3 major goals for myself this year and have literally accomplished all 3! I’ve added a couple more to the list, so stay tuned…

Much love,

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AFFECTED BUT

NOT INFECTED Real stories from our community

Covid-19 has not only impacted our community healthwise but also personally, professionally, and otherwise. Take a look at the shared stories from our community of nurses, college students, educators, business owners and business professionals of just how much this virus has impacted our day to day lives.

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Amina Smith | Anchor/Reporter, Stadium Sports Network

“COVID-19 has changed my daily life in a number of different ways. As an on-air host, I typically do shows instudio or on location and there’s an energy in those environments that is hard to match from Skype in your living room, but I’m learning! Not only has work changed, but also daily life. How I interact with people (in the grocery store), how I handle myself and my family once we return from outside, decontaminating everything. It’s been a huge adjustment realizing that we’re not just trying to work and function from home, but trying to function doing everyday tasks while in the midst of a very real health crisis that is taking lives every single day.”

Jarette Pendergrass | Educator “When I was deemed "essential" I developed a form of "occupational anxiety" that I have never experienced before. I found myself in a constant state of paranoia.

Does he have it, does she have it? I am very close to my grandparents and I feared bringing the virus to them and them not being able to fight it off. Although there are negatives, there is also a positive side. I have been able to really focus on my relationship with God. He has dealt with me and guided me to practice common sense, but not live in fear. These unprecedented times have helped me prioritize the importance of family and friends. As humans we can get so bogged down with the pressure and stress of life that we forget the important things. I have made my relationships with my family and friends and their well being a priority and an "essential" part of my calling.”

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Simone Harvin | Brand Strategist

“Life in the wake of the pandemic looks very different than anything I could have predicted. In a matter of weeks, my digital branding and marketing strategy business has taken a major hit. Many clients, like much of the world, are working diligently to adjust to our new temporary normal, which for many involves budget cuts and strategic pivots due to the sudden reduction in revenue. For me and my business, that looks like the loss of several clients who aren’t able to continue working together. In spite of this seemingly bleak outlook, I’ve found this time extremely valuable to revisit my business as a whole — from processes to services offered, I now have the time to reflect on what is and is not working and make adjustments for future clients. Taking this time as the major gift that it is to slow down, continue to provide strategic counsel for our remaining clients and focus on what the next iteration of the business will look like post-COVID.”

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Mark Richard | HR Director

than relatives; they were second parents, role models, baby sitters, your biggest cheerleaders, your leaning “If anyone would have told me back in January that post during tough times, and most importantly, a never the COVID-19 virus would have such a profound ending source of unconditional love. There was no impact on me personally, I would have laughed and way I would have imagined that my 71-year old aunt told you, “it’s not that bad.” Having a leadership role who did not drive and mainly only went to church, in an international business environment, I was well medical appointments, and family functions would aware of the impact of the novel Coronavirus began to have been diagnosed with COVID-19. You could not have on the global economy and some of the alarming have prepared me for the fact that my aunt who helped projections. I knew that this virus was going to have a raised countless family members would die alone lasting economic impact on the world. What I was not in hospital room. There is no way that I would have aware of was the fact that COVID-19 was going to turn dreamt of being on a family prayer line, leading my my world upside down. family in prayer when the call came in from the doctor that they were unable to save her despite their best As a child growing up in rural Georgetown, SC, family efforts. Everything that I know wanted to jump in my has always been extremely important to me. In my car and go console my mother who just lost her big admittedly large family, uncles and aunts were more sister and a person that has been there for her through every season of her life; and she did not get to say goodbye! Unfortunately, this was not possible and it was not the end of our family’s nightmare.

Just a few hours later, we would get the phone call that my mom’s brother also passed away and the funeral home received a call that he potentially passed away from complications of the virus. Two family members gone in one day and there was no way that the family could do what family does! The coronavirus has inconvenienced many of our normal lives. We cannot hang with friends, go to the gym, or attend a brunch or church service. For my family, the virus not only caused an inconvenience, it caused us pain and then caused us to be unable to grieve and support each other as family using our conventional methods. No extended hugs, no gatherings around a fire in the yard telling stories of our loved ones, no gatherings around good and memories, no seeing and loving on the other family members, no big home-going celebration to send our loved ones off the way they deserved. COVID-19 has us physically isolated from each other, and has some family members who have been exposed quarantined in their houses. It has caused a pain that is unbearable and that I would not wish on anyone.

At the end of the day, we cannot change the events of the past few weeks, but I must admit my family has learned new ways to come together. My family (including older relatives) have learned how to do conference lines, how to do group FaceTime chats, and group text messages. I am glad that although this virus has cost us a lot and caused us a lot, we have still come together and we will get through this!”

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Kiki Smith | Co-owner, Kiki’s Chicken & Waffles “The COVID-19 has effected our business in so many ways. We have furloughed about 90% of our employees. We have temporarily closed our Bower Parkway location being that the traffic on that side of town has dropped tremendously so it was just best for us to just to close that location. So all employees from that location have been furloughed. At our Parklane location we are currently doing To- Go Orders only and we are only working about 5 at the most employees to serve our customers. Most of the staff at this location has been furloughed as well. Most of our staff have applied for unemployment to be able to stay afloat while they are not working. We are currently waiting for the Coronavirus lock down to be lifted so that we can open back up. We know that our processes will change in a way that will affect our normal operations, but we will make the necessary changes as needed. We hope that after this pandemic things will go back to the way they were, but we know it will not be the same.

As most business owners, we are hoping that the government will provide assistance that will be forgivable when businesses open back up, and not just assistance for the upcoming 8 weeks. The reason why I say this is because business owners do not know if business will be the same. Revenue may not be the same, and that’s scary for any business.”

Marco Glorious | On-air Host , Actor “It’s definitely having me hit the reset button on all aspects of my life. Surprisingly, I’m actually an individual who enjoys being by themselves just as much as I enjoy socializing. I’ve been using this time to make adjustments on a few projects that I’m working on. I’ve also been using this time to rest well, watch Netflix, and continue a suitable workout routine. I find myself trying to capture the same essence I had when I was a kid without totally ignoring this unfortunate reality.”

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Danielle Waugh | Celebrity Makeup Artist

“The pandemic has literally taken over my mind, body and spirit. I think the first stage for me was denial which allowed me to function in a seminormal productive capacity. However as it really hit NY, and being overwhelmed by the news things took a turn. As a freelancer, the first thing that hit me was, “ how am I going to survive the duration of the pandemic “. That became increasingly frustrating as I received emails and calls informing me that pay I had been expecting from previous work would be held off with an indefinite date of receipt. As an artist, I know that outside of having long standing contract work that my services are considered a luxury. With that in mind, even coming out of the global crisis didn’t seem as promising.

As a black, SBA in New York the challenges here are phenomenal. How I maintain my sanity is trying to stay in connection with family friends and colleagues, try to stay as healthy as possible and think of ways to reinvent or pivot how I provide my services when things get better.”

Paulana Lamonier |

CEO/Founder, Black People Will Swim

“My 9 to 5 I am a social media strategist at a New York City-based university. From 5 to 9, I am the founder of a newly-established business Black People Will Swim— where our mission is smashing the stereotype that Black people don’t swim. Our overall mission is to teach 2,020 people how to swim by December 2020. We launched on March 13 with goals to launch our swim program Saturday, April 3.

Due to COVID-19, we had to postpone our swim program to a later date. Prior to the program, I had spent $2,000+ of my own personal money on certifications, business insurance, registration, as well as video producing and marketing and was hoping to recoup the expenses with the swim program.

And to add to the cherry on top, as of Wednesday, I found out that I have been furloughed till June 30.

Despite my current circumstances, I am still hopeful. Now i am using my free time to relax, read and spend time OFF social media since it plays a huge role in my career and business.”

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Brittany Martin | Event Services Specialist

“The pandemic has been an interesting turning point for my professional and personal life. On the day that the mandate to stay at home was placed in effect, I started a new position at a new company in Atlanta. I joined a team of 15 people, and began the process of virtual training and my first trial run at working from home. As an Event Manager, discipline and time management have become my greatest tools in navigating my career, however this pandemic has truly challenged me to grow in both of those areas. This new way of living and working have allowed me to tap into more of my creative energy. Although the state of the world is very unsettled, I’ve been able to find a new understanding of peace, lean on my team, and create more time for rest. I’ve even been able to complete one of my passion projects that I had plans to finish later in the year. It hasn’t all been ‘ups’ during this time, but I’ve been blessed to not have experienced loss in the way that many others have. My thoughts and prayers go out to every person that’s been affected in some way. I do believe that there is some hope to be found in all of the stillness.”

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Kristen Gordon | CEO, K. Marie Photography “This pandemic affected my life both negatively and positively, ironically. Being a full-time service based entrepreneur, the stress and anxiety immediately came once we were under quarantine because I could not work anymore. There’s so much uncertainty of this virus and not knowing when I can return to work is unimaginable. We could have never seen this coming or prepared for it. I’ve tried applying for unemployment and small business relief programs but I found myself becoming impatient and anxious to find an immediate solution.

It’s easy to sit and sulk over all the negatives and even lose inspiration or motivation to try to find the good in all of this. To make sure I stay grounded and try to maintain a good mental space during this challenging time, I practice meditation daily and spend more time with God. I know that He has the power to make all things possible, and times when

I was close to panicking over financial hardships, He still made a way. My faith has grown even stronger.

Since being forced to stay home, I’ve been able to tap into my creativity more than I ever have before. Ideas and new ventures I’ve been sitting on or putting on the back burner for sometime are now coming to fruition. I have the time now to pour into my other passions and even find new hobbies to enjoy. I’m teaching virtual classes now and expanding my brand releasing a line of products soon. I believe on the brighter side of things, this pandemic has given us the opportunity to sit still, look within and learn how to use our greatest potential. As a creative this has reminded me to not put all of my eggs in one basket. It’s pushed me to create multiple streams of income, so that if this should ever happen again I know I can still generate revenue sitting at home on the couch.”

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Praylonn Prince | Musician

“My name is Praylonn Prince and I’m a musician that lives in Charlotte, North Carolina. This experience has been a unique one, because on one side it’s like, “Man I finally get time to practice, but on the other side it’s like “wait.... I’m not receiving any money”.

As musicians we are always on the go, so the break was nice but .......... yea it’s time to get back to work! I was recently on a cruise ship tour for about 4 months and I got back in January right before everything went south. My mindset is “I got money saved, I got production opportunities, I still have a church I’m playing for, I know how to scale back on overspending IM GOOD”. But when the church (I just started in February) cancelled the services (with no livestream services) and EVERYBODY is affected by this pandemic, no one can really afford anything.

Needless to say, I had to file for unemployment to be safe.

On the other side of this, this Pandemic has taught me some very valuable lessons: Gratitude - I’m noticing stuff I’ve walked past for years. I recently heard someone say, “I really looked at a tree for the first time”. On the inside I’m laughing so hard ... until I started going for walks.... “I guess these trees aren’t too bad” NATURE BABY!!!!!

All of the restaurants are closing, or the line is wrapped around the building for takeout orders.

So, ya boy has learned how to cook (just a little bit, DON’T ask for nothing yet, I’m not saying all of it is good). What I’m saying is I NEED MY MONEY COVID -19!!! But it’s also cool dialing back and reflecting on being a better me.”

Kimani Perlote | Full-time Student, Columbia College

“On March 16th, like any other college student, I attended my classes, went to work, studied, and did my homework. After that, I hung out with my friends. We went to the park, out to eat, and made plans for next week to hang out. On March 17th, in a blink of an eye, everything changed.

The college was told to do an emergency evacuation from the college campus until further notice. On April 4th, we were told to move out of our dorm rooms. This pandemic has put a pause on my life.

Since the pandemic, I have to take all of my seven classes online, I lost my work-study job, and I can no longer spend time with my friends.

I can’t go to church, I can no longer celebrate my 21st birthday with a social gathering, and I have to be extremely cautious about everything I touch, and everywhere I go.

Even though I’ve had to make major adjustments to my life, this pandemic is giving me more quality time to spend with my family, to study the bible, paint, draw, and to focus more on my selfcare. Most importantly, this pandemic has taught me not to take health and freedom for granted.”

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Thai Barker, Esq. | Attorney

“Though it has not directly impacted my health, this global pandemic has affected my sense of peace and tranquility. These are unprecedented times that call many aspects of the future into question: economic stability, job security, love, health, and, most importantly, normalcy. The stress and worry that many people are facing regarding the lasting effects on their everyday living is consuming. And while many are not affected health- wise by this disease, the stress that it has placed on our society and economy is worth giving special and specific attention to, as well. I just pray and hope my preparedness for this possibly permanent new way of life strengthens, and my hope for further stability doesn’t wane.”

Jasmine Hubbard | Travel Nurse

“Hey readers! My name is Jasmine Hubbard and I am a 27 year old travel nurse. I have been in healthcare for the past seven years. I was a CNA from 2013-2015, and then a registered nurse from 2015 to present day. With the COVID-19 pandemic going on, writing has been my escape. I recently wrote a blog post about being a millennial nurse during COVID-19 and it was my most viewed blog post TO DATE. It had almost 300 views and almost 50 shares between Facebook and Instagram. A lot has changed since that recent blog post. I was quarantined at home for 15 days due to a “possible exposure” from one of my patients. Thank God they came back negative. Now, before we can even go on the floor to work, we have to be prescreened for symptoms of COVID-19 by answering specific questions, getting our temperature checked, and receiving a surgical mask before we can walk the halls to our unit. We have to wear that surgical mask the whole twelve hours of our shift. To me, it is very unsanitary and can be suffocating. The reason we have to do this is because it is hard to determine who has it and who doesn’t.

You can be a carrier without showing any symptoms. To top it all off, everyone thinks nurses have job security, right? That can’t be further from the truth. Unfortunately, the hospital that I am working at now cannot extend my contract until June like we planned. I have one more week left at my current hospital then I have to find another place to work. My hospital has cancelled all of their travel nurses; we are not having enough patients come into the hospital so that means less work to divide between permanent staff and travel nurses. I am coming to this situation with the mindset that God is in control. I cannot worry about what I can control. What I can control is my response and how I go about it. I am taking each day as it comes, just like how I’ve been doing the past month with this pandemic changing the dynamic of our world. I am not going to lie, I do get nervous and anxious but I have used this time to work on myself. I am putting in work on my personal projects, checking in with family and friends, exercising and reading more, spending less time on social media, and taking this time for Jasmine. My advice to anyone reading this: come to God with a clean slate. Allow Him to renew your mind and refresh your spirit with new plans and ideas during this time. The best things always come out of a crisis like this. Will you be the same person that you were before this pandemic? I hope not. Much love and light, and God bless.”

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Alores Norris | CEO/ Founder, The House of Flawless

“COVID-19 has affected my life in so many different ways. On one hand there is my professional life. My store has been closed down due to the virus. Little to all income has stopped and I was forced to send separation letters to all of my employees which hurt me greatly because The House of Flawless was their full-time job. I hated closing down. Mentally it shattered me because my store means everything to me.

On the other hand, it forced me to think outside of the box. Yes, the physical store is closed but I still have my online store. COVID-19 forced me to think outside the box. What can I do next??

Virtual classes--Yes okay! Catch up on inventory for the online store--Okay,Yes! OH! I wanted to write a book--Perfect I’m doing it... As a business owner just sitting isn’t going to work for me. I have to work, so my mind is continuing to come up with ideas. Now that I am home, I can actually work on those ideas and get them done. No more procrastinating; I have all the time in the world to get it down. COVID-19 hurt but it has also turned me into a different type of beast! I am confident that when this is over, I am coming out on top of this thing with a different mindset.“

Anaya Bastian | CVICU Nurse “This entire experience has been so life changing. I had to drop out of grad school, I’ve been working four to five days, 12 hour shifts a week. My co-workers, some of them at least, has been let go on furlough.

Meaning, there is no PTO allowed for them so they are trying to decide whether to buy medicine for their sick child, or pay their bills by April 5th so they have a place to live. I have now been in self quarantine for approximately 31 days. Why? Because every time I take care of a new producer covid-19 patient, day 1 starts all over again, in order to protect my family, my partner, and even those I don’t know. I continue to be brave despite my fears, these people need me now more than EVER. There’s so much love and gratitude to those that do recover and survive. We just have to be thankful For Life, Health, mental, physical, and emotional, and for the togetherness that we have shown to each daily.”

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Sharae Moultrie | Performer & Nonprofit Professional “I currently juggle two careers - I’m a performer and a nonprofit professional. COVID-19 has had a tremendous impact on both in very different ways.

As a nonprofit professional, it has been a busy time for me. I work for a human services nonprofit organization that aims to help improve the lives of those living in poverty. As you can imagine, low-income communities I was fortunate enough to finish my last musical are being hit the hardest by the COVID-19 crisis. They theater contract days before NYC went on lockdown. are facing challenges such as unemployment, lack of Since then, theaters across the country have gone access to food, issues with childcare and more. Our dark, commercial and film productions canceled and nonprofit is fully functioning but completely remote. auditions for future work have been put on hold for the I’ve been working from home to do my part to help foreseeable future. I essentially have no idea when our organization raise funds to connect those most I’ll be able to perform on stage again. I like many of vulnerable to resources that will help them survive this my artists friends are using this quiet time to work on pandemic. our craft. I’ve been taking advantage of online acting courses, updating audition materials, and creating my On a personal note, I’ve been doing my best to stay own art. I’ve made it my goal to be ready to hit the positive, connect with God and check on family and ground running when theaters and other performance friends. It’s during times like this that I focus on the venues open up (hopefully sooner rather than later). people and things that are most important to me. I know we’ll get through this.”

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Alicia Zeigler | Small Business Owner “As a small business owner in the entertainment industry, my industry has shut down entirely over night. Intro Talent and Branding and Management Agency , a full service agency with offices in Charlotte NC & Greensboro NC, is no longer receiving castings as film and tv production for most shows, movies and commercials has temporarily ceased due to the stay at home orders in most major cities. With no castings coming in, INTRO is unable to book jobs or earn commission and subsequently had to terminate the employment and contracts of a few of our team members to scale down to ensure we can return to 100% when this is over. As the producer of 2 fashion weeks and several other annual events, we’ve seen a decrease in registrations from vendors, designers and sponsors during this time as well. But enough with the negative! The key during this time is to stay connected to your audience and to find other ways to remain relevant. Some steps that we’ve taken to apply this are as follows: 1. Convert everything to digital if you haven’t already!

We are providing acting and runway coaching to our talent via Skype and Zoom and conducting new face model and acting auditions via Skype. We are sending personal and heartfelt videos from our staff to our talent board regularly with tips on not only how to stay safe but how to stay sharp during this down time so they are ready to go when things pick back up.

2. Set up payment arrangements for your clients who have pending invoices. A little bit of something is alot better than a whole lot of nothing! Some people are still working during this time and some have lost their jobs.

Setting up payment arrangements for those who need it keeps cash coming in and shows your clients that you have a heart and care about them as well.

3. Find ways to keep your audience engaged! We are currently planning a COVID Couture virtual fashion show with our models where they will design their best fashion looks and masks out of recyclable materials found around the house and we will piece together the videos they submit for a full virtual runway show! This will keep morale up and keep your audience engaged in your brand. Have fun!

4. Find other ways that your brand can generate revenue. The “branding” side of INTRO Talent Branding and Management Agency has already secured new clients in need of websites and brand kits for social media during the stay at home orders. Alot of people are at home thinking about those gifts they haven’t

been using and those companies they have been meaning to start and they are in need of branding, coaching and business start up services! Find ways to remain relevant and profitable during this time!

5. Think outside the box! Being as we are a fashion and entertainment based industry, we’ve started selling stylish face masks since there is a shortage and people love them! Keep revenue coming in by daring to innovate, adjust and adapt!

While COVID-19 has affected my brand, it has not shut it down. I believe Americans are resilient people and millennials especially have been groomed for this our entire lives. We know how to hustle and multi task and how to create to stay alive and generate revenue.

This shut down should be exposing flaws in your business structure, giving you time to do any needed housekeeping with regards to your websites, your contracts, pricing, services, products, etc so that when this is over, you are better than you were before! Stay encouraged fellow entrepreneurs! You’ve got this! This is your chance to show the world what you’re made of!”

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Marian Browne | Nurse

“What is it like being a nurse and mom in the middle of a war?

As coronavirus pandemic continues to move throughout the nation and the world, I ask myself, how am I surviving and when will it end?

By now we are all familiar with social distancing, Hashtags such as #stayhomesavealife, and cancelation of schools. The effect of COVID-19 is endless.

A lot of emotions going through the minds of people all over the world. As a healthcare worker, preventing the spread of COVID-19, protecting those who need our services, protecting those we love and take care of daily, and protecting those who can’t protect themselves is our priority.

We are each called to be servants of God, as Jesus was. Jesus Christ, the Son of the most high God, humbled himself and washed his disciples’ feet; if the King of the heavens and the earth did it, so will I. Am encouraged each day when I go to work to be of service to those whom God have called me to service.

As a wife of a deployed solider, a mother to my children and a nurse on the frontline and now a teacher due to school closure, how am I surviving this crisis? My answer, HOPE. Hope in Jesus.

It is the ONLY way am serving this crisis. We all need hope in a time of great uncertainty.

As I look at the situation I get discourage, but then I find an eternal hope that keeps me going. On my own I’m fearful. With God I’m faithful. I turn off the news and turn my eyes and heart towards God. I pray and continue to pray and trust that God hears and will rescue. I choose to not live in fear. I choose to live a life of faith, even now more than ever.

Fear says you are done. Faith says the future will be won!—Jon Gordon. I choose to look to God in the mist of COVID-19. I choose to not be overwhelm by COVID-19. GOD is our help in this hour. He will give us wisdom on how to deal with this crisis.

In a time that we can no longer go to church as usual, let us as a nation, continue to pray and fast and seek God to heal our land. I want to encourage everyone to be strong. Strong in your faith. Strong in your love for your family and be strong in your purpose in life.”

Kiahna | Owner of Kreme and Krumbs “I have been temporarily closed since March 14th and loving it. I’ve been really enjoying this time with my daughters and husband.

We never get a chance to unplug. I have a couple of family members who were diagnosed with COVID but they are kicking it’s ass! So I am truly grateful.”

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Jennifer Fleming | Nurse “I feel I am doing my duty by staying at work watching my patients hearts but there are still a lot of people in the hospital are getting less hours than usual and this pandemic is scary for workers losing their livelihood.. I just ask that we pray for everyone and their families”

MoniQue LaBelle | Cosmetologist & Business Owner

“Being in the cosmetology field is very rewarding, as we are very passionate about what we do and who we do it for. It is often said we are counselors and friends. Fact is, our clients are the exact same. As of April 1, 2020, we were mandated to close our doors tentatively for 15 days due to COVID-19. It’s highly likely that time will be extended. As entrepreneurs we are now having to find other ways to extend services to our clients without direct contact, just to keep some kind of capital flowing. This pandemic has tremendously affected those of us in feast or famine fields. If we don’t work, we don’t get paid! However, bills are still coming, needs still have to be met, and there are monthly business expenses that still have to be paid. For now I am applying for the various small business loans and grants being offered to those affected by the virus. I’ll continue to stand strong and encourage everyone to do the same.”

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FA S H I O N

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SPOTLIGHTS

by Tacara LaStacia

Photographer: (Pictured)Kay N James Photography Right: Howell Designs

Fashion Spotlights: Marie Denee | @thecurvyfashionista 20XXtheMagazine.com | 30

First and foremost, I need you to clear this up for I noticed on your website you were looking at the me, what exactly is plus size? new line from Beyoncé and you said actually that the largest size in that line would be an extra-large.

Plus size starts at traditionally size 14 and up Now is extra-large considered plus size or is it safe to say that that particular line doesn’t have Okay so I was just telling one of my girlfriends the anything for plus size beauties? other day I said I buy my jeans in a 14, really because I have thighs (I’m a Well it’s interesting because black girl) but my waist extra-large is all dependent on is probably more like how the brand defines it. Even a ten-ish. I would say though the expectations tops, I usually go about from the consumer has a a large just because I different definition a lot of have girls up top. Would retailers will put a size 14 as I be considered plus an XL. There are different size size? charts. There’s a straight size size chart, there’s a plus size You’re sort of in between size chart, then there’s a junior plus size chart. There’s even a Got you, okay. So, tell contemporary size chart. So, me a little bit about depending what brand you’re the Curvy Fashionista looking at the sizing is going brand. to be different. That’s why it’s important to always know The Curvy Fashionista your measurements. started off as a blog, but it soon evolved into a digital But in regard to the Ivy Park platform where we talk and collaboration, the biggest discuss the latest in plus challenge and frustration was size fashion trends, the that it was INCLUSIVE, that’s community and business what was being pushed. side of plus size. So, we are But what people don’t first a news and resource understand is that inclusive, dedicated site. We share how the community, industry, what’s the latest and the everyday person hears newest of what’s happening for the plus size consumer. inclusive, is in the size inclusivity. So, while some people see inclusivity for men and women and however you identify Awesome! Now we know that fashion as a whole yourself… inclusive, especially when it applies to clothing, is ever-changing, what is your forecast for the top people are looking for everyone to participate. trends in plus size fashion for 2020?

I can honestly say I never thought about it from I actually am curious to see how the straight size brands; that standpoint, but I like that, and I think that’s the straight size retailers actually migrate or how they start something that should be brought to the forefront. to include plus sizes into their mix. We’re starting to see a lot of attention from mainline brands and them dipping their Right! Which is why I think is part of why that was such a toes into plus size fashions. So more of the contemporary big disappointment. They have their plus size dancers on brands are adding more plus sizes to their mix.

Beyoncé’s team. Adidas has actually done collaborations through a 4X in the past and their own brands are up to a

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3X I believe. So, to see this was such a missed opportunity adolescent in my senior year of high school, I think and more defined by choice whether it be on Adidas’ side I may have weighed right under 90 pounds. I was or the Ivy Park side. wearing a size double 0 in jeans through college. I was happy when I got to a size 3/4 but then I heard I would love to see how that unfolds. birth control makes you thick, I’m a black girl I want to be thick, and basically, I blew up a little bit. Now I’m such a nerd for this.

I’m at my heaviest weight and I’m teeter-tottering between 195 and 200. I’ve been there for like the I can tell but I love it! I’m here for all of it! Tell me past year and it’s like I don’t even know what to do this...what would you say is the biggest mistake or with myself. Mind you I’m 5’7” so it doesn’t look like fashion faux pas a plus-size beauty can make?

I’m 200 pounds, but I know it and I’m so in my head all the time about my weight. So, what advice would So, in plus size fashion we have been given so many rules you give to women in general to defeat the demons for so long that sometimes it’s hard to part out what’s of body shaming and just low self-esteem due to in alignment with yourself. So, for me it’s really about not body complex issues? finding your own beat. So, if you’re sitting here thinking like, “Oh I can’t wear this because of X” or “The rules say this...” Be mindful of the media you consume. Because the media I’ve always encouraged folks to find you consume is the one that’s telling you a rule and break it. Because how are that somethings wrong with you. So, it’s you really going to figure out your “I’ve always encouraged folks to find a important to surround yourself with folks rule and break it” style? The pictures they paint of a plus that can help challenge those norms size woman in the past have always and what you identify as bad. been someone who’s messy, who’s fat, who’s hiding, who’s in transition. All of these jacked up, Debbie downer pictures You have leveled up in terms of success and it’s that they’ve painted. Well thank God for social media. not just in one area you have a successful blog, Which has allowed the plus size person and community website, and brand. What advice would you give to redefine those rules. And now some of these brands to aspiring entrepreneurs and even bloggers who don’t know what to do with it. They’re like “what you mean? are looking to make 20/20 their year to change the You actually want to wear color? You actually want to wear game of their lives? something outside of black, brown or navy?” There are all of these marketing tropes that are being constantly It’s going to be very important to hold onto and to define challenged. So, I think the biggest faux pas is not actually your “why?”. In terms of numerology, four is supposed to exploring what makes you happy because now we actually be the build year and for building the foundation. So, it’s have brands that actually speak to or cater to those things. going to be really important that you do the research, the It’s important that we find our own style, our own comfort work and put in the time. Realize that nothing worth having levels. comes easy. You can’t compare your day 1 to someone else’s day 100. Although you see folks blowing up via What would you or how would you describe your social media, what you don’t see is the work they put in personal style? for years beyond that that’s even given them the platform.

Understand it’s going to take time and hone in and hold onto I don’t know, I think I’m still in a new transition with that. I find the “why?” of what you started. It’s so easy to be distracted I like structure. I like a real contrast between masculine and discouraged if you base your worth and your business and feminine. I like the sexy and bold, the hard and soft off the numbers and followers. When you know and have combination of the two. So, for me I like a clean line, slick and a clear understanding of why you started and who you’re classy but I also want to feel comfortable. serving and what problems you’re addressing… you’re operating in your purpose. I think that’s what is really crucial, So, let’s take a moment to talk about body image. and I wish I would’ve understood that a lot sooner. When Now if I’m being transparent, I have had body you build up a great tribe of support, that’s what’s going to image issues my entire life but what’s crazy is keep you encouraged. it’s been from one extreme to the next. As an 20XXtheMagazine.com | 32

Photographer: XL Shoots 20XXtheMagazine.com | 33

Fashion Spotlights:

Charissa Renee | @iamcharissarenee

1

When did you decide design was the path you wanted to take?

I honestly just created my own path. I wanted to make clothes that I couldn’t find living in Kansas. I figured why not learn how to sew and make what you want to wear.

And Charissa Renee was birthed.

2

What was your biggest fear in launching your line?

Truthfully speaking, I have no fear when it comes to the clothes I create. Because it’s what I want to wear for me. I believe it turned successful because people saw and felt I believed in myself.

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4

How do you want people to feel when wearing your clothes?

I want women to feel beautiful of course. But I also want women to feel I put my all in each garment. To have a garment handmade by one person, should make that wearer of it feel super special. It was made just for them.

5

What is your favorite part about being a designer?

I would say my favorite part of being a designer is I can be free about my interpretation of how women can look in clothes. That you can be modestly dressed and still be just a fly and stylish.

“Truthfully speaking, I have no fear when it comes to the clothes I create. ” - Charissa Renee

3

What was your biggest mistake/lesson learned since creating your line?

Get your money UPFRONT. I was burned a lot in the beginning. Also, all money isn’t good money. If you feel you have a client who could potentially be a problem and feel that from the beginning....DON’T TAKE THEM as your client.

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Quintina Hobson | @kweenish_ 1

When did you decide design was the path you wanted to take?

Honestly I’ve always had an interest in fashion but it was mainly just styling myself. In June of 2016 the name KweenISH just dropped in my spirit one night as I was going through a really dark period in life. I remember having my cousin designing a logo for me. Even then,

I still had no definite direction as to what I would even use the logo for. I hit up a person on Fiverr and had them create an animated photo of myself and told him to add the logo to the shirt. I posted the image on Facebook and the response was overwhelming. Everyone was like “omg I want a shirt!” So that summer I started with KweenISH tees in a few colors and the rest is history.

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Photographer: Kodak Queens Photography

2

What was your biggest fear in launching your line?

I’m such a risk taker so I can’t really say that I’ve had any fears. I usually just go with my gut and hope for the best!

3

What was your biggest mistake/lesson learned since creating your line?

I would say my biggest mistake is not utilizing my social media accounts consistently. More specifically Instagram.

4

How do you want people to feel when wearing your clothes?

Like Royalty!

5

What is your favorite part about being a designer?

The admiration and inspiration. Peers and customers make me feel like I’ve really made it big even on days where I feel like I have so far to go.

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Fashion Spotlights: Emma Kamanda | @africanbadgyal1 1

When did you decide design was the path you wanted to take?

I knew I wanted to become a fashion designer ever since I was 10.

I would make my own Barbie clothes out of tape and have fashion shows. I even would make my own accessories like bracelets and headbands and kids at school would ask me to make them for them. Adults would always ask me my options on what to wear as well from that point I knew what I wanted to do I knew that I had a gift. I liked how I could bring a smile on someone’s face with my fashion abilities.

2

What was your biggest fear in launching your line?

My biggest fear in creating my line was if people were gonna like me or get where I was coming from because I was so used to people not getting me being a eccentric black person especially.

3

What was your biggest mistake/lesson learned since creating your line?

My biggest mistake was being afraid of what people thought about how I express myself through fashion. I guess the lesson is to always stay true to yourself. It doesn’t matter what other people think or even what you may think is bad. I can be my biggest obstacle

4

How do you want people to feel when wearing your clothes?

I want people to feel free to express themselves through fashion and emulate their style the best way they can in a unique way.

5

What is your favorite part about being a designer?

My favorite part about being a designer besides I get to do what I love everyday is that I can express who I am through fashion freely.There is nv a wrong way to be who u are and I am my authentic self through fashion .I get to share that with other people and hopefully people will feel free and emulate their own style through my fashion in a positive way breaking societal norms that people will tell u not to break.

Top picture is a custom made mask Emma created to help aid in staying safe during COVID-19. Below are her fashion sketches

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BEST FOUNDATION Fenty Beauty Pro Filt’r $35 Store: Sephora BEST LIPGLOSS Fenty Gloss Bomb $19 Store: Sephora

OVER 40 SHADES!

BEST BLUSH Black Radiance Artisan Color Baked Blush $4.99 Store: Target

BEST MASCARA Beauty Bakerie Eyelash Icing $18 Store: Ulta Beauty

BEST BLACK OWNED MAKEUP BRANDS BEST RED LIP Fenty Stunna Lip Paint $25 Store: Sephora

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BEST EYESHADOW Juvia’s Place $10-25 Store: Ulta Beauty

1

THRIFTING 101 with TiffanyJ

hrifting seems to be a new phenomenon. Is T there a method to this madness? Do you have a strategy?

Well, for me, thrifting isn’t new. I was raised going to thrift stores like Community Thrift and The Sunshine Store with my mom, aunts, and grandmother. It was always something my family did, especially on Saturdays. Of course, now, I thrift not only for myself, but I look out for great items that I can resell. Thrifting most times means getting used items at a 70-90% mark down off retail price, but it also means, finding vintage treasures that would be one of a kind pieces for modern day. These vintage pieces aren’t always “cheap”, and I shop with many thrift resellers that mark up pricing of these fabulous finds. These type of clothing and jewelry help me keep a unique style that is hard to mimic genuinely.

2

an I be honest? I feel kinda weird wearing C other’s people’s clothes. Did you ever feel like that? If so how did you get past it?

I never felt that way. I think generally, people may have a phobia of used items. Some folks would rather have everything brand new from clothing to furniture.

I honestly firmly believe in a man’s trash is another man’s treasure! I also celebrate the clearance rack in ANY store. Shopping out of season brings forth the most savings in brand new items if that’s your preference.

3

Do you have a favorite thrift store?

My favorite thrift store is Goodwill. Here in SC, I know the sale schedule to include dollar days and my favorite 50cent days. Occasionally, they will run a 50% off EVERYTHING sale, and you can not beat that.

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4

hat are some thrifting Do’s and W Dont’s?

DO check for blemishes, missing

buttons, spots, etc. It’s important that you understand these items were once used, so flaws should be expected.

DON’T go thrifting with a set look in mind. You buy what you find. You don’t go searching for what you’re missing.

DO have patience! You can’t thrift without it.

DON’T return stuff. It’s my pet peeve to see

DO check the tags before reaching the register.

DON’T go thrifting with a headache…. it’ll only

Sometimes items are placed in wrong sections.

DO set a budget. Even though it’s “cheap”, youstill don’t want to overspend. I often go in with $10 and that’s all you can spend.

DO shop on sale days.

people returning items to the thrift store.

make it worse.

5

hat is the best thrifting tip that you can give W us?

The best thrifting tip I can give is think about how what you currently have can be paired up with something you see in the thrift store. That way you create wardrobe possibilities before you leave the store.

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RIF (READING IS FUNDAMENTAL) | BOOK LIST What’s on our reading list? Check out these top 15 must-read books by black authors that you need on your own list!

IT’S NOT ALL DOWNHILL FROM HERE

By Terry McMillan After a sudden change of plans, a remarkable woman and her loyal group of friends try to figure out what she’s going to do with the rest of her life.

BECOMING

By Michelle Obama Becoming is the memoir of former United States first lady Michelle Obama published in 2018. Described by Michelle as a deeply personal experience, the book talks about her roots and how she found her voice, as well as her time in the White House, her public health campaign, and her role as a mother. Her Netflix special “Becoming” has also received raving reviews and is also a must-see.

LAKEWOOD

By Megan Giddings A startling debut about class and race, Lakewood evokes a terrifying world of medical experimentation— part The Handmaid’s Tale, part The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks.

Sources: Wikipedia, EverydayEyeCandy.com

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WOW, NO THANK YOU.

By Samantha Irby A new rip-roaring essay collection from the smart, edgy, hilarious, unabashedly raunchy, and bestselling Samantha Irby.

LIFESTYLE

SAVING SAVANNAH

By Tonya Bolden From acclaimed author, Tonya Bolden comes the story of a teen girl becoming a woman on her own terms against the backdrop of widespread social change in the early 1900s.

RIF (READING IS FUNDAMENTAL) | BOOK LIST

REAL LIFE: A NOVEL

By Brandon Taylor A novel of startling intimacy, violence, and mercy among friends in a Midwestern university town, from an electric new voice. Named one of the most anticipated books of the year by Entertainment Weekly

THE ONLY BLACK GIRLS IN TOWN

By Brandy Colbert Award-winning YA author Brandy Colbert’s debut middle-grade novel about the only two black girls in town who discover a collection of hidden journals revealing shocking secrets of the past

LIFESTYLE

HOOD FEMINISM: NOTES FROM THE WOMEN THAT A MOVEMENT FORGOT

By Mikki Kendall A potent and electrifying critique of today’s feminist movement announcing a fresh new voice in black feminism

THE VANISHING HALF

By Brit Bennett From The New York Times-bestselling author of The Mothers, a stunning new novel about twin sisters, inseparable as children, who ultimately choose to live in two very different worlds, one black and one white.

TROUBLE IS WHAT I DO

By Walter Mosley Morally ambiguous P.I. Leonid McGill is back -- and investigating crimes against society’s most downtrodden -- in this installment of the beloved detective series from an Edgar Award-winning and bestselling crime novelist.

PARTY OF TWO

By Jasmine Guillory A chance meeting with a handsome stranger turns into a whirlwind affair that gets everyone talking.

THE LAST NEGROES AT HARVARD

I DON’T WANT TO DIE POOR

By Michael Arceneaux From the New York Times bestselling author of I Can’t Date Jesus, comes a wry and insightful essay collection that explores the financial and emotional cost of chasing your dreams.

CLAP WHEN YOU LAND

By Elizabeth Acevedo In a novel-in-verse

By Kent Garrett The untold story of the that brims with grief and love, New York Harvard class of ’63, whose Black students Times-bestselling author Elizabeth fought to create their Acevedo writes about own identities on the devastation of the cusp between loss, the difficulty of integration and forgiveness, and the affirmative action. bittersweet bonds that shape our lives.

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MEMORIAL DRIVE: A DAUGHTER’S MEMOIR

By Natasha Trethewey A chillingly personal memoir of a daughter reckoning with the brutal murder of her mother at the hands of her former stepfather, and the moving story of a poet coming into her own in the wake of a tragedy.

LIFESTYLE

Top

5 Podcasts hosted

by Black Women COURTNEY SANDERS SHOW

On The Courtney Sanders Show (formally known as The Think and Grow Chick Podcast), host Courtney dives into entrepreneurship, finances, spirituality, and personal growth topics that are sure to kick you in the butt to chase your goals..

WHOREIBLE DECISIONS Whoreible Decisions is the uncut podcast of sex and all of its KINKS from two Corporate New York women, Mandii B & Weezy.

The NYC-based hosts talk about their sexual adventures (and misadventures), as well as all the sexual-wellness information you’re too scared to google.

JESUS AND JOLLOF Jesus and Jollof is a podcast featuring Luvvie Ajayi and Yvonne Orji, two proudly Nigerian women (who have no behavior) talking about the things they love, their stories, and life in general. Why “Jesus and Jollof?” Those are the two things they cannot do without. Besides, the other option was “2 Goat Queens.

H.E.R SPACE PODCAST Their Instagram bio couldn’t have said it any better – if you’re a Black woman looking for an extra dose of inspiration, you’ve come to the right place. Hosted by Terri Lomax and Dr. Dominique Broussard, H.E.R Space Podcast serves as a safe space for conversations for Black women, by Black women. Conversation topics range from identifying yourself as the toxic one in your relationship to life hacks to saving time and energy, and we are here for transparency!

ON ONE WITH ANGELA RYE

Sources: flare.com whoreibledecisions.com podcasts.apple.com hellobeautiful.com

Angela Rye is known for being a badass woman with a mouth and mind not sculpted for the faint at heart. The notable political commentator will not only empower you as a woman keeping abreast in politics, socioeconomics and culture, but On One will give you another lifestyle, witty and humorous side of Rye. This podcast elevates important Black women voices in the political movement and is essential to empowerment within our community during this political climate.

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COOKING with VIRAL TIKTOKER

By Keya Talley How did you discover your love for cooking and what age were you when you started?

I actually started cooking when I got in the military. I was working at KFC before then but I never worked the kitchen just the cash register. I hated the way my life was going so I join the military, and ended up becoming a cook.

However it’s funny cause I never really cooked like this in the military, a lot of things You see me make is self taught.

How did you get into creating content for TikTok? My first TIKTOK account, I was making videos just like I make now but wasn’t getting as much attention as I do because I was using the music TIKTOK promoted. I ended up getting locked out that account when I got a new phone. So when I made a new account I started playing around with features and music and people were like “Ohhhh who is this with the good food and old school music on TikTok?” It kind of just became a hobby that turned into a lucrative business.

AU

Most of my videos go viral but the barbercue chicken and Mac and cheese video hit a little different. Lol What's your favorite dish to cook?

My favorite dish to cook is Chicken Parmesan. If I had a second runner up I love making different types of bread, especially pizza dough and loaves of bread.

What does your family always request you to make?

They never request anything lol! They just be ready to eat whatever I bring to the table.

How do you come up with your recipes?

A lot of them are stored in my internal memory from the Army. I just take those and remix them because Army food was so bland.

I’m good at recreating too.

I’ll see a picture of some food from a restaurant and replicate it. It’s fun, and it always looks better than theirs Haha!

What's your most viewed video on TikTok and did you gain any celebrity followers or people you've admired?

My most viewed video right now is my seafood Mac How did you find out or did you even know that you and cheese, actually it’s running a close race with were going viral on Twitter? my Southern 4- Cheese Macaroni. I remember one I woke up one morning and people kept inboxing me morning my friend texting me saying “Loren Marsai on IG and Facebook like Yo Loren one of your TIKTOK Martin from Blackish follows you on TIKTOK.” I was videos is all over Twitter. You’re viral.” I’m like huh? Viral? stoked. I love her.

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UNTIE LOREN AUNTIE LOREN’S BROWN SUGAR GLAZED SALMON

AUNTIE LOREN'S BUTTERMILK CHICKEN TENDERS

Do you have any future projects coming up and if so what are they?

Right now I am working on my cookbook! It’s full of a lot of the recipes you see on TIKTOK. It’s my first cookbook, it’s dope, and I can’t wait to share it.

Tell me a little bit more about being a mom and a disabled army vet and how that affects your day to day life and if that plays into your passion for cooking.

I love being a mom. I have 3 kids. Jaiden, Jojo, and Riley.

They keep me grounded. They keep me motivated because they are kids they love TIKTOK, and they love seeing mom go viral. I don’t allow my PTSD or being partially deaf affect my life, and if it does become something that’s bothering me I just start cooking.

Cooking is like therapy to me.

How has this quarantine boosted your creativity in the kitchen or in general?

Quarantine actually helped me big time in the creativity department because more people are home to watch my videos and cooking. They kind of pushed me in making this cookbook, and making a cookbook requires a lot of creativity. I have learned not to procrastinate as much, I could have been had the cookbook out... but it’s all the Upper Power’s timing.

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AUNTIE LOREN’S GARLIC BUTTER & HERB LAMB CHOPS

You can follow Loren for more delicious recipes and content on IG @auntie.loren and on TikTok @auntieloren

DAWN S First things first, how are you and your family coping with quarantine life?

the decision to shut it down was the right decision especially since we’re 5 or 6 weeks into quarantining you know but you feel bad. You feel bad for the amount of work that you put in as a staff and certainly the dreams of young people are shattered when something like this happens but again they are young, they are resilient. They will fight to get back to this place next year and then hopefully we can compete and get back to some normalcy first and then get back to getting on the court and competing for a National Championship next year.

I mean thankfully and prayerfully we aren’t impacted in a health wise way but I think what’s coming out of it is we get to bring it back to the simpler things in life. We are communicating a little bit more, staying at home where we are just in a lot more contact than otherwise because everybody just pretty much goes on their busy way and they got their own life. Now life has stopped for us and now we can put things in perspective and get back to some family things while we have an opportunity.

It has been a major adjustment for all of us but like you said I too am grateful for the quality time that we’re getting to spend. Now I must say as a Carolina Alum and a Gamecock fan I was crazy excited about the possibility of us getting yet another National Championship so tell me what it was like for you and the rest of the coaching staff and the team when you guys got the word that the NCAA stop the season due to the pandemic.

Well our fingers are crossed and that is absolutely my hope. So thinking that we do see things to get back a little normal what can we expect on the horizon for the 2021 season?

I mean we got a team full of players who are extremely intelligent and they put themselves in vulnerable positions, and when I say that, it’s like they want to work on their weaknesses.

Our players are like our coaching staff. Last year during their practices they would say to me, “I’m not talking enough. I’m not talking loud enough.

I’m not communicating.” and she said I mean obviously we were devastated... “I’m going to make it my business to you don’t get as close as we’ve gotten not have any coach say that to me to win the national championship here this year.” You know that hit me at a very often but the times they do get place in which I was like aw babe this here you want to at least compete and team is this team is truly great. People live out your own fate. We didn’t get an want to be leaders. People want to opportunity to do that but I thought be vulnerable to their peers and that 20XXtheMagazine.com | 48

STALEY doesn’t happen very often. So you know every time we have a zoom call with our team somebody or a couple of players really say things that resonate with me to the fact that they want to get better.

We can be our best coaches when our players use us as resources and that’s what this team wants to do and I’ll be so excited to get back with them and get to a place where we can hug up on them, we can love up on them and get to a place where we can push them to get better.

That definitely sounds like the makings of another championship team so I’m looking forward to that. Now before I let you go I want to take a short trip down memory lane via some visual aids. Here we have college Dawn, Naismith 1991 and 92 Player of the Year. And I do want to point out that you did make history by becoming both the Player of the Year and Coach of the Year but tell me what were her dreams and aspirations during those early years? This was the early 90s... years before the WNBA was even around... what was she aspiring to become?

Photographer: South Carolina Athletics

Spain. I went over the Tarbes, France. I went over to Italy and Brazil, all chasing my dream and obviously it lead me to staying in the game and becoming a coach.

Well this next one is by far one of the greatest moments in my Alum’s history. Tell me what your thoughts were the moment the buzzer sounded that signal the end of the 2017 women’s college championship game.

What I thought about was just... I mean I had like a reflection of 17 years of coaching and then add my four years of playing Collegiate basketball and that moment escaping everybody besides the current players that were and coaching staff that was a part of that moment but I went into reflection mode.

I, as a player, my teammates never got a chance to win a National Championship so I felt for them. And then every former player that I convinced to come to Temple and to come to South Carolina to experience that particular moment, they were robbed of that opportunity.

So I was really in the moment with them... expressing my gratitude for them allowing me to to grow into that Oh wow that’s a good question. I mean space and to win. So what I did was, that was super competitive Dawn. that a lot of people don’t know, I gave That’s never left me. I wanted to win the miniature national championship national championship which that had trophies to every one of my teammates never taken place in my college career. in college, to one of my former players I wanted to play as much basketball that believed in me as a coach but we as possible and I didn’t care where I never got it done, and every one of my played it ‘cause I went over to Segovia, colleagues who was with me during the 20XXtheMagazine.com | 49

All photos are credited to South Carolina Athletics

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times that we didn’t win. So it was kind of cool to reflect to do that and if the Martin show ever came back I and to kind of give them an opportunity to share in that would love to reappear and be in the show. moment.

Okay, we need to make sure Martin sees this That is AWESOME! I really didn’t know that so because I know there’s talks about a possible thank you for sharing that with us. Last one... I reboot so... was preparing for this interview and my younger sister said “I remember a moment from one of our Let’s go, Let’s go! favorite TV shows…” *A picture of Dawn Staley on the Martin show appears* So here you are in your Well I’ll make sure I absolutely retweet this and element, still on the court, but on the Martin show. make sure they get the word. Alright well thank So I have to ask are we going to see more cameos you again Coach Staley. Thank you for being who or is there a possible career shift to acting once you are. Thank you for coming to South Carolina, you retire from coaching? we love you here. And we’re looking forward to another championship.

NEVER! NEVER! I think I did work with the Martin Show a few decades ago and I didn’t get an Emmy. I didn’t even Well thank you, it’s a great marriage. I love South get nominated for an Emmy.

Carolina. I love being here. I love the people. The thing that people ask me about South Carolina is, what...

My Dad was wondering that. you know... what makes it go? And I have to say it’s the PEOPLE that have grown on me completely. Like I can’t But that was one of the most amazing weeks of my see myself anywhere else but being here in South life and I know I’ve won a lot of different awards and Carolina. And I love that feeling that I have about the got recognized by a lot of different organizations but state. being on the Martin show was by far one of the most gratifying experiences that I’ve ever had. Only because Absolutely! Thank you so much. you and your it was my favorite show. It was everybody’s favorite family stay safe and we’ll see you next season. show.

Stay safe as well. Thank you for having me!

Right it was everybody’s favorite show back then!

Young people today can relate to that show and enjoy it. So to be able to experience being on your favorite show it was quite amazing. I’m actually sitting next to you know... I was packing and unpacking some things and I came across this *picks up an autographed script from the Martin Show*.

Oh wow!

This is the actual script of the Martin Show that I did and you know I got them to autograph the script. And I actually tweeted this out a couple of days ago, over the weekend and Tichina Arnold who played Pam tweeted me back and said I beat her in spades, which I did. So it was just kind of a cool experience that we got a chance

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HEALTH & WELLNESS

“

THE MENTAL HEALTH TIP: Destigmatizing Mental Health I think you should get some help”. “What are you talking about, what type of help?” “Professional help”. “Oh no I don’t need that, that’s for crazy people”. Does this conversation sound familiar to you? Well it is a real conversation that actually happens in the African American household and community. There is a stigma of seeking mental health services especially within our community. There are four factors that contribute to this stigma. One of the factors is the big misconception that therapy or counseling is for “crazy” people. However not all people who seek counseling or therapy are “crazy”. In fact, we try to avoid this term “crazy” because of its negative use. A more appropriate word maybe, “unstable” or “mentally ill”. Even this has another layer to it, now it is true that some people who use mental health services may have been diagnosed with a severe mental illness but not everyone who seeks treatment is dealing with something of that level of severity. It is defined that therapy or counseling is the process of meeting with a therapist to resolve problematic behaviors, beliefs, feelings, relationship issues, and/ or somatic responses (sensations in the body). Therapy is simply a safe space to talk openly. Another factor that may contribute to African Americans resisting therapeutic services are privacy reasons. In our African American community, many were taught what is said or done in our house stays in our house. This was passed down through the generations. When a person attends therapy they can still maintain their privacy because the therapist is bound by legal and ethical laws to keep the conversation confidential.

That means what is spoken between the client and the therapist only remains between those two parties, with the exception of the therapist having to report current child or elder abuse if that is disclosed in the session or if it is legally required for the therapist to testify in court. However therapy can be a great space for an individual, couple or even a family to finally talk about issues without feeling judged because the therapist plays an unbiased role only wanting to help the individual, couple or family come up with their own solutions to their own issues. The third factor is

due to religious or moral reasons. Faith and belief are a big pillar in the African American community, it is truly how our ancestors survived the turmoil they faced in America and prayer was how they made it through those difficult times.

For generations it has been taught to us if something terrible is going on in your life then just pray about it. Prayer is definitely a positive aspect that is needed in life. I personally am an encourager of prayer in addition to therapy. Even in the Bible it quotes that faith without work is dead. So just imagine how you could become more empowered with both the power of prayer and also therapy. Obviously someone already thought of this because there are in fact faithbased counseling centers. The last factor is that therapy is only for White people. This is not true.

We ALL have issues that need to be talked through. The color of a person’s skin should not be the reason to stop them from seeking or receiving counseling. If a person is very resistant to going to therapy due to racial reasons then perhaps they should first seek a counselor or therapist of their own ethnic background (www.psychologytoday.com is a great resource to look for therapist in your area). As a community we should be encouraged to go to therapy and not feel judged or shamed about it but actually empowered knowing that we are taking the steps to enhance our emotional and mental wellbeing which are both precious and valuable and that in turn helps to improve our overall wellbeing. Therapy or counseling can be a great service to help enhance one’s life. So I truly encourage you to take a leap of faith and schedule a counseling session in an area near you. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain!

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”

Kendra Talley Masters of Science in Community Pyschology For more from Kendra Talley, one of our Health & Wellness columnists , check out 20XXtheMagazine.com

HEALTH & WELLNESS

FIRST TIME HOME BUYING

with Realtor Ebony Harris

BY KENDRA S. TALLEY

Ebony is a Greenville, SC native and a graduate of Lander University where she received a Bachelor’s of Science degree in Business Administration. She was exposed to the real estate industry as a teenager through a family business, viewing the new construction process of a property. She is devoted to serving the needs and dreams of real estate buyers and sellers of the Greenville area. Ebony is a part of the National Association of Realtors®. This esteemed organization sets a higher standard to just being a real estate agent.

She enjoys traveling, shopping, and binge watching her favorite Netflix shows.

1. WHAT’S INCLUDED WITH THE HOME PURCHASE? “With the home purchase, the land that the property sits on and the actual home itself is included.”

2. WILL TAXES AND INSURANCE BE INCLUDED IN THE MORTGAGE? “Property taxes and homeowners insurance is included in the mortgage payment. The mortgage company pays those on the owner’s behalf.”

3. WHO WILL SCHEDULE THE HOME AND PEST INSPECTIONS? “Usually the real estate agent schedules the home inspections, but if the client wants to do so they are more than welcome to.”

4. HOW MUCH MONEY SHOULD I PUT DOWN? “There are mortgage lenders that have programs where you are not required to put a down payment the home. In this case, you can put down any amount that you want if you would like to. Then there are some mortgage loans that require you to put down at least 3.5%. It just all depends.”

5. CAN I GET MY MONEY BACK IF I DECIDE NOT TO BUY? “There are certain fees that if you paid you could not get a refund on like appraisal fees and inspection fees because those services would have already been completed.

Money for the earnest money deposit could be refunded if the client decides to retract their offer within the due diligence period. The earnest money deposit is money that is held for the home to show the seller that the client is a serious buyer. The due diligence period is when the

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client will have the inspections completed, mortgage documents are reviewed, etc. The due diligence period can vary upon 10-30 days depending on what the seller and the buyer agrees on for these things to happen. If the buyer decides to walk away from the deal, then the money from the earnest money deposit can be refunded back to the buyer.”

to this type of loan is that the monthly payment can change frequently over the life of the loan. If a client is considering an adjustable interest rate mortgage loan, they should consider the worst-case scenario of the interest rate resets to the maximum cap in the future. Would they be able to afford those mortgage payments?”

6. WHAT KIND OF CONCESSIONS SHOULD BE ASKED FOR IN THE OFFER? “Some repairs for the seller to complete should be asked for in the offer. Some clients also ask for the seller to pay the closing costs to the attorney, a lower price, or the seller to pay for the home warranty. I always try to make sure that my client as the buyer is treated fairly throughout the deal.

I may suggest things that they may want to ask for in their offer.

9. SHOULD I GET A 15 OR 30-YEAR MORTGAGE? “Whether you get a 15 or 30-year mortgage is totally up to what you can afford and how soon you would like to pay off your home. I would advise getting a 15-year mortgage on a home you do not plan on staying in long term or you want to pay off your home sooner than most. I would advise getting a 30 year mortgage for a home you plan on being long term. 30-year mortgages have the lowest payment because you have more time to pay off your home. If you would like to pay extra towards your payment, you would have more room to do that.”

7. WHAT DO I NEED TO QUALIFY FOR A LOAN? “To qualify for a loan, I advise my clients to have at least a credit score of a 620. You must have at least 2 years of stable employment, bank statements from the past 90 days, W-2s and tax statement from the last 2 years to start out. The mortgage lender may ask for other documents.

It’s best to have these documents ready when you meet with them.”

8. SHOULD I GET A FIXED RATE OR ADJUSTABLE RATE MORTGAGE? “It all depends on the situation what is best for the client. In most cases, I would advise getting a fixed rate mortgage. Those are most popular. Fixed rate mortgages charge a set interest rate for the life of the loan. The amount of principal and interest paid each month varies from payment to payment, the total payment remains the same, which makes budgeting easy for homeowners. The downside to fixed rate mortgages is that when interest rates are high, qualifying for a loan is more difficult because the payments are less affordable.

The interest rate for an adjustable rate mortgage varies. The initial rate is set below the market rate on a comparable fixed rate loan. They are more complicated than fixed rate loans. There are different terminology that the client must understand if they are considering an adjusted rate mortgage. The biggest advantage of this type of mortgage loan is that it is significantly cheaper than a fixed-rate mortgage. The downside

10. DO I NEED A REAL ESTATE AGENT? WHERE DO I FIND ONE? “No, you do not need a real estate agent, but I would advise that you get one. I say that because real estate agents look out for your best interests. There may be certain terminology or situations that you may not understand, and a real estate agent could be a vital asset.

You can find a real estate agent by doing a regular google search. More often, real estate agents are found on social media platforms now.”

“

To qualify for a loan, I advise my clients to have at least a credit score of a 620.

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Ebony Harris Bachelor’s of Science in Business Administration For more from Ebony Harris, check her out at thepropertybarllc.com/ebonyharris

HEALTH & WELLNESS

Sanity Tips for Moms During COVID-19: When Quarantine-Life Starts to Drive you Nuts

“Quarantine life got moms wanting to pull all their hair out!

Children are at home 24/7 for about 4 straight weeks now and us moms wonder if we will ever get our sanity back. Our children have worked our nerves nonstop daily; siblings are annoying each other, kids stay asking for snacks about ten times a day, they make messes everywhere, they tear up something around the house, and they call for mom probably at least a thousand times a day!

For moms who are working from home, I feel your pain in all this chaos. Trying to work and focus in a home filled with children running around, screaming, fighting, and anything else that I failed to mention. You are not alone. We all wonder if there will ever be a light at the end of this dark, messy, quarantine-tunnel!

We are all slowly running out of ideas of what to do to keep our children busy. Whether you have one child or more, the struggle is very real! Moms who have partners are probably exhausted from the heightened sexual activity by this time in the quarantine life. We love our partners and we love our children but know that it is still okay to feel like you just want everyone out of your face for a couple of hours or maybe even more. But what do we do, we don’t have anywhere to go?! That’s the biggest challenge today in this COVID-19 era. Every one of us in the household is feeling the negative effects of the pandemic. The children who are too young to understand are also struggling with being cooped up in the house for way too long. Our partners are probably tired of our random attitudes and most likely, tired of the kids too.

So how do we moms can keep up with our mental health during this challenging time? Here are three insights that are beneficial to our mental health during this time.

1. KEEPING A ROUTINE

Remember when the children had to be in school? We had to get up at a certain time to make sure the kids are awake, fed, and ready, then we go to work and/or school. Now I’m not saying get up super early still, but maybe between an hour and two hours later than usual is more realistic.

Keeping the routine helps your child/children stay on schedule, which establishes boundaries, expectations, and healthy constructive habits. Th daily routine also creates security, a calmer household, gives our child/children confidence and independence, offers children opportunities to get excited about what’s next, and provides room for “special day/activities”. Plus, we will start to look forward to the weekends because weekends are when we have no routines and can pick and choose what we want to do with our family.

Having a morning routine, midday, and evening routine helps keep order in our home, and it will give us a sense of security and control when everything else outside of our

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home is so uncertain and demoralizing. Make your routines fun, simple, and flexible. And lastly, remember that our kids are just being kids. We can easily get caught up in our frustrations and we may catch ourselves yelling more than usual. It’s okay. But remember, it is also okay to apologize to our babies, let them see our vulnerabilities, and help them understand and feel assured by our loving and forgiving hearts.

2. PROTECTING TIME

education? Do I need to be more financially responsible?

What are my goals and what do I need to do to achieve them? Do I need to work on being more organized? Do I want to learn new recipes and explore new hobbies? What areas do I need to refine when it comes to parenting? What can I correct within myself to have a better relationship with myself and my partner? Do I need to talk to a therapist to help me process any past traumas? These are just a few of the many questions we can ask ourselves to increase our awareness, promote mental health, and enhance our human growth and development. Remember, a happy mom equals happy babies, and our children deserve a happy and healthy mommy.

How do we get time for ourselves in this new norm? We protect it. It may take more creativity for single moms but having a set time (an hour or two during the day) of just being in the present moment can make a huge shift in our mood. Whether the time is used to work-out, drink a glass of It is our responsibility as human beings and as mothers wine, watch tv (not news-related), or remotely catch up with to practice self-awareness and pursue self-growth. We friends/family, having a set time for yourself is rewarding for your mental health. If your children no longer take naps, setting a time for quiet time and sending them to their rooms to play quietly or watch tv might be helpful. And of course, when the children are in bed, take an extra hour or two for more me-time. Try not to stay up too late just bingewatching and scrolling through social media and try to stay away from the fridge!

For us moms who have partners, collaboratively working with our partners while communicating our needs is the start of self-care; it is also a trait of a healthy relationship.

Protecting our time empowers us. So, discussing with our partners times and/or days when we need “me-time” is essential. However, let us not forget that our partners also need our time. When the children are in bed for the night, using this time to reconnect with our partner can build the relationship. Whether you and your partner watch a movie together, have intimate conversations, play darts or other two-player games, finding something that you both enjoy adds life to the relationship.

are meant to grow, just like every life here on Earth. Sure, parenting has its challenges, but we are destined to create life, nurture, and develop our precious babies. Things are frustrating, things are hard, and there is no foreseeable sight when the COVID-19 pandemic is over. But I just want to remind you all, from one woman to another, mother to mother: You are strong, You are capable, and You are resilient! Queens, hang in there. Whatever it is you are going through; I believe in your inner strength and power.

We will get through this together.”

Acknowledgments: https://www.petitjourney.com.au/10-reasons-a-daily-routineis-important-for-your-child-and-how-to-set-one/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/little-housecalls/202003/parenting-during-covid-19-part-2

3. CHALLENGING SELF-GROWTH

Ah, self-growth; Why should we care, the rest of the world is falling apart anyway?! Because honey, you are damn worth the self-love! Evaluating yourself is self-love because you get a better picture of where you can improve yourself.

Do I need to eat healthier? Do I need to develop a workout routine? Are there people I need to forgive to free myself from anger and resentment? Do I want to pursue higher

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Marie-Kriz Beltran Masters of Arts in Clinical Mental Health Counseling For more from Marie-Kriz Beltran, one of our Health & Wellness columnists, check out 20XXtheMagazine.com

WORK/LIFE BAL ANCE with

Tameika Isaac Devine

Founder of The Possibilities Institute

By Tacara LaStacia

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“

Work Life Integration allows you to be true to yourself and your goals by not sacrificing what is truly important

20XX is the love child of my “coming of age” in turning 40, and realizing who I really am. I start all interviews with this question: When did you realize who you were? I think we are always realizing who we are.

I have had several transitioning periods in my life. A few that stand out are (1) I used to run with a fairly large crowd of girlfriends. People I thought validated me. When I "lost" some friendships that I thought would be lifelong, I felt I was alone. I realized that I didn't need other people to make me feel loved or important. I knew that many people compromise themselves and their values to be part of a crowd and I realized that I didn't need that. That situation made me mindful of what true friendship is and made me realize that sometimes you have to keep your circle small to have people who can truly appreciate and respect you for who you are. (2) Losing our son James Henry , when I lost my son I realized how your life can charge in an instant and you need to enjoy and appreciate what you have. That helped me not worry about what people expected of me but I needed to be happy.

WORK-LIFE INTEGRATION: What exactly is that?

Work Life Integration is finding synergy between your professional and personal lives. Work Life Integration allows you to be true to yourself and your goals by not sacrificing what is truly important Does balance really exist? What does that look like?

True balance is unachievable does not exist. Society has made us believe that in order to be happy we need to have work life balance and when we don’t we think we are failing. But having true work life harmony allows you to give yourself permission to let your priorities to drive your actions.

I thought I had “a lot going on” as we like to say, but you wear many, many, hats: Wife, Mother, Author, Councilwoman, Attorney, Life Coach, Public Speaker...Did I miss any? How do you prioritize your daily demands?

I plan my weeks out on Sunday and try to make sure I schedule time to do what is important to me and my family.

I review my to dos every day and shift priorities as needed. I manage expectations of myself and others and don’t allow others to dictate my schedule.

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What is a Life Coach?

I am a certified personal and executive coach but I like to call myself a work life integration strategist and leadership mentor because I focus my work on high achieving professional women specifically around work life integration strategies and leadership.

How Do I know If I Need One? Most everyone can benefit from a coach.

Even coaches have coaches. If you need support and accountability around your goals and help taping into your full potential then a coach could be helpful.

What is the Possibilities Institute and how can it help those of us who need help “getting our lives together?”

The Possibilities Institute is a peak performance public speaking, coaching and consulting firm specializing in helping women leaders and working moms with work life integration strategies and leadership mentoring so they can excel professionally while maintaining a family first lifestyle. I help by providing coaching and trainings. You can find more on my website at www.adevinelife.com You wrote a book entitled “Think Like A CEO, Act Like a Mom”. Explain the title.

CEO’s run companies based on a clear sense of principals. They have a clear vision and goals for their company. The same way a CEO runs a company, we need to run our lives that way. And if you apply the same principals a CEO does to a company to your life, you will have the direction in your life that will allow you to enjoy your life as a mom.

Do you feel that you have reached your personal level of success or is there still more that you aspire to attain?

Of course there is a lot more to do. When you stop setting goals and trying to achieve them, you aren’t living up to your full potential.

Before you leave, what quick tips can you give our readers to begin the process of work life integration?

1. Set priorities that reflect your values. If it doesn’t align with your values and goals, it is not worth your time.

2. Limit time wasting activities and people 3. Have a supportive tribe that can serve as accountability for you To see more tips, you can download my top 10 work life integration tips from my website at www.adevinelife.com 20XXtheMagazine.com | 60

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