VIOLET SUMMER ZINE ISS. 5 1
© 2019 Violet Summer Zine, All Rights Reserved. Published by: Mel Writes, LLC
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Melissa Henderson
Ashley Uzer
Chandler Jay
Melissa is a writer on a quest to make cool stuff. She loves telling stories, shopping, and working with other likeminded people. She is currently helping people run their business while starting her own. For selfcare, she goes to barre class three times a week, walks 10,000 steps a day and drinks lots of water. She wants people to stop saying they grew up in predominantly blah blah blah nieghborhoods because it diminishes one’s self worth. This summer she will be working and going to the beach. Meet her there.
Ashley is a writer, artist, and blogger with a focus on affordable fashion, plantbased food, travel, and lifestyle. She also sometimes get on her soapbox and talk about her soberish lifestyle or her obsession with gratitude journals. Ashley has written for DC Magazine, Galore Media, Bustle, HelloGiggles, VICE, and more.
Chandler Jay Ponti is a father, artist and native New Yorker. Chandler met Melissa and her crew at a party on the UWS years ago and they have been friends ever since. Chan is currently writing and producing music through his group Tribe Wild Musiq. Also known as West Side Slim, his music is a mix of R&B, Rap and Poetry. Follow him on Instagram @sexbiscuitz
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Aramide A. Tinubu
Kendall Alexander
Naria Symone
Aramide A. Tinubu is a film critic and entertainment journalist. Her work has been published in EBONY, ESSENCE, Bustle, The Daily Mail, IndieWire and Blavity. She wrote her master’s thesis on Black Girlhood and Parental Loss in Contemporary Black American Cinema. She’s a cinephile, bookworm, blogger and NYU + Columbia University alum.
Kendall Alexander is not here to sugar coat the shit that happens to her in her day to day life. Kendall doesn’t have the time to make you feel comfortable, because she’s too busy trying to figure out how she can be comfortable in her own skin (society hasn’t really made it easy). Her blog “Let’s Get Into It” spits the truth about catastrophes that everyone goes through, but prefer to remain silent about it. So she’s here to save them from their catastrophes and to convince them to live in truth.
Naria Symone is a communications strategist who resides in Brooklyn, NY. She’s passionate about uncovering cultural and behavioral insights to inform brand strategies that empower marginalized communities. She specializes in executing integrated marketing campaigns with strategic cause and media partnerships, diversity initiatives, and high-profile media events with celebrity ambassadors.
Collaborators 5
Genny Mack
Morgan Mosley
Raina Asid
Get Fit with gennymack
My name is Morgan Mosley from Wilmington, Delaware. I started photography my senior year in high school with shooting and developing black and white film. My favorite Photography technique is leading lines because it gives your audience more of a vivid capture from the eyes of the photographer. My favorite photography to shoot is Street, Beauty, and Nature. I’m eager to see where it will take me in life.
Raina Asid is a graphic designer trying to make the world more aesthetically pleasing one image at a time. She is a consistent creator or some pretty dope illustrations. When is she not infront of her computer, she somewhere deep in The Golden Girls universe. To see more of her work, follow her on instagram: @asidchronicles
classes were founded in 2017 by Genail McKinley, a Certified Group Fitness Instructor, based in New York City. When Genail is not training clients and teaching classes, she is working as a full-time Financial Services Consultant/CPA in NYC Get Fit with gennymack classes bring fun and energetic workouts by using bodyweight techniques to build muscle, cardiorespiratory endurance and agility. My dream is to own several fitness studios.
Collaborators 6
Features Self-Aware is Free
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Good Energy
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We Need People To
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New York To Nairobi
P.18
Leland B. Martin
P.22
Too Yellow To Be Blue
P.26
SHAKTIBARRE
P.29
From India With Love
P.31
Teach Me How To Love
P.34
Digital Rights
P.40
Interview with Law Grad Annie Seifullah
P.41
Building Online Communities Sista Circle
P.49
The Fourtress
P.53
Novella
P.55
Sanity Addiction: Part 4
P.57
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the most meaningful thing i’ve learned this year is that happiness, joy, beauty, security and peace are free. society and corporations try to package them up and sell them to us but these attributes live on the soul level so they can neither be packaged nor sold. they’re free. camilledargan
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Self-Aware is Free By: Melissa Henderson
It was inevitable to focus this year’s zine on self-care & wellness due to the current hostile political climate driving everyone insane. It seems like everyone is in their feelings and looking to make meaningful connections in efforts to become more grounded with their mind, body, and spirit. There are plenty of wellness and selfcare developments we could have dedicated page space to but what we won’t to do is explain it matter of factly. Like you don’t already know to stop eating Chinese food from the corner store because it probably contains MSG (Monosodium Glutamate). A common side effect is bloating, fatigue, dehydration and weight gain from intaking excessive amounts. Although all facts, it didn’t stop me from ordering four wings with salt, pepper, and ketchup with a small fried rice and egg roll a few times a week as a teenager. Later in my adult life, my Chinese store visits are still like clockwork but once a month and on occasion Buddhakan. Many times this ritualistic cash-only transactions gave me perspective about the type of people who still don’t know how to eat healthily. It was in my local takeout spot that I got into a minor altercation after rejecting this dusty dude from getting my number. Mind you, I was wearing workout clothes and carrying a yoga mat when he decided to compare his skin complexion with mine, as well as insult my toenails and I was wearing sneakers! He said something about how the rapper TI ain’t shit because “girls only like light skinned n*ggas now” and that because he was “dark-skinned” it was becoming harder to pick up women. First of all, I’m a proud black girl! Periodt. And as painfully ignorant as this all sounds, it was even more disgusting to witness it being said to my face. Why was this dusty dude so angry at me for not being nice to him? Of course, this situation wasn’t about me. It was more about his lack of self-awareness, a major personality trait people need to develop and build within themselves because it doesn’t come naturally. And that’s just it. Wellness and self care are trial and error in regard to how they exist in urban cultures. What we won’t do is talk about stuff that’s already been written in mainstream magazines. Issue 5’s stories are meant to contribute to the universal conversation for getting your self care mind right. As always, each feature is genuine and presents a timely response to urban culture IRL. It’s not necessarily about the latest diet that burns fat - apparently, the KETO diet is not good for your vagina smell the same way cigarettes aren’t good for anyone’s bodily hygiene?? Contributor Ashley Uzer’s candid response to “I like your vibe” pickup lines is the exact type of energy we won’t be addressing. Do you really like my vibe, bro? Or are you just caught up? One piece of advice I highly recommend is going digital with self-care. Download a meditation app ( my personal fav is Stop. Breathe. Think). VSZ’s stories about wellness and self-care are literally just a small fraction but aim to inspire readers to dive deeper into whatever their intuition is calling them towards. 10
Good Energy
By: Ashley Uzer
Getting Rejected By A Dude From Planet of the Apes, And Dating in LA as an East Coast Girl It’s around 8:30 PM on a Sunday night, and the guy I just went on a first date with is currently holding my trash bags while I strut around the home supplies aisle at Ralph’s. I couldn’t carry the trash bags myself, because I’m currently cradling a 12-count of toilet paper. For all the east coasters, Ralph’s is the standard LA grocery store for the non-boujie of us that can’t afford Erewhon. For all the people wondering what kind of person would invite their date to accompany them on a toilet paper grocery run...nice to meet you. I’m Ashley, and I just moved to LA about a month ago. Most girls seem to hate LA’s dating scene, saying the guys are all fuckboys or divas that expect girls to “work” for them. I’ve noticed LA guys are much less likely to ask for a second date when there clearly was no chemistry on the first. On one hand, this could mean they’re not “working” for it enough, but on the other, I think this just saves us both a lot of time. There’s also the blind confidence of some of the men here, like the stereotypical stoner bro who said he saw me walking down the street in my The Doors t-shirt and whipped his car around to come talk to me by knocking on my car window in the parking lot (yes, I went out with him and yes, he sells weed for a living). But it’s not the same blind, almost rape-y confidence of east coast guys. East coast men seem to be more like, “I know you said you don’t want to go to dinner with me, but maybe if I invite you to Tao (or Miami) for the fifth time, you’ll decide to say yes.” LA guys, in my experience thus far, are more like, “I’m going to shoot my shot because you have “good energy,” but every step of the way I’m going to check in and make sure you’re still into what’s going on. If not, I’m not going to try to convince you.” The “you have good energy” thing seems to be how guys say “I like your tits” in LA-lingo. Those same guys may also ask for your horoscope sign and Google your compatibility seconds after your first date. I always thought the idea of using “what’s your sign?” as a pick-up line was a joke, but I think literally every date I’ve gone on since moving to LA has involved me disclosing my horoscope sign (scorpio, BTW). Countless other interactions have involved guys trying to guess my horoscope sign—whether it occured in an Uber 11
Pool or at a bar. According to the people in LA I may have some Gemini tendencies? While this obviously sounds like a hilarious cliche come to fruition, I honestly prefer it to east coast guys’ refusal to even entertain the idea of the zodiac because it “can’t be real” (or more realistically, because it’s perceived as a “girl thing”). Even if you don’t believe in it, you can discover a lot about a person by discussing their sign. When a guy asks for my sign, I usually describe that, true to my sign, I’m very sexual, a total control freak in most aspects of my life, and emotional deep down but behind a hardened facade. I mean, I think those are good things to know about someone before you continue going out with them, don’t you? Of course, there are places where these cliches err on the bad side (or hilarious side, depending how you look at it). My favorite anecdote thus far is when an actor who legit played an ape in Planet of The Apes told me we should cancel our date because the energy was off. We had been messaging on Raya — an invite-only dating app known for its celeb members — for a few days. When he admitted he was an actor, I made a sassy comment about feeling I had been “bait and switched” because he didn’t disclose list it on his profile. He was not happy about this comment. After his defensive statements, he sent me a YouTube link to some of his acting. I initially thought he sent it as a joke, because it was a clip of a bunch of monkeys. Had I not watched it for one more second, I would have messaged him saying, “good thing I love hairy guys.” But, I eventually saw him
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getting interviewed about his role as an ape. I’m not sure if I didn’t act impressed enough, or he reflected longer on my former statements, but a day or two before our scheduled date, he messaged me saying he decided we probably shouldn’t go out because he felt there was bad energy. It sounds funny, but in reality it was a good thing. Like I mentioned before, I think LA guys pick up on things quicker—or maybe they’re just less desperate and don’t need to shoot a million shots hoping one will hit. Ape-y and I were never going to seriously date, and judging by my reactions to his photos upon second glance, we were never going to have sex either. Why not save us both the time and trouble and cancel our date for an innocuous reason? Because truly, you don’t need a good reason not to go out with someone. We’re all busy. Oh, and back to the toilet paper guy. I did warn him not to come into Ralph’s with me. I told him to call his Uber at Ralph’s instead of walking me the extra block home, because I had to run in and grab something. When he persisted — assuming if he made it to my front door, maybe I’d invite him inside — and asked what I had to buy. I told him straight up. Keep in mind he did not live in LA, he was just visiting—hence the persistence. He said something like, “wow, you really put it all out there.” And, to be honest, maybe I do...but maybe it also had something to do with the fact that I knew I probably never wanted to see him again. And, like I said, we’re all busy.
She Making Moves, Moves It’s been forever since we spoke to zine homie Jessica Berry, but every time we link up, it’s always a celebration. She actually ran into Bellamy at a concert a few months ago, it was a VSZ divine intervention. ‘Hey! I haven’t talked to you in forever. Life is so great. I love Bellamy. The new Soho house is about to put DTLA on the map. I’m trying to stay focus on my business and launch my Series. You gotta move to LA.” She said all of this in one breath in true Jess spirit. Props to her new dope gig, too! She making moves, moves. It was just yesterday she was waitressing at Sur. Now, you too can party with us at Soho house DTLA. The lifestyle brand’s latest property for cool people will call LA’s art district home this coming August. The renovated 5 - story warehouse features not 1 but 3 restaurants, a gym, a pool, 100+ hotel rooms and of course performance art space. Save your coins. There’s already a founding member list and those under 27 get a special discounted rate membership from the regular $3,300. Better get ya portfolio together, you’ll definitely want to be on this list. Keep it locked on VSZ’s IG page for more insider news. - Melissa Henderson 13
We Need People Too By: Kendall Alexander When Sunday morning comes around, I kind of hate myself, just a little. I say to myself “Damn bitch, you just wasted another weekend, again. How could you let this happen? Did you do anything for yourself that you actually wanted to do? No, you were too busy doing all that adult shit you hate to do. Well, at least you already have some plans tonight. Try again with that other shit next weekend.” The “other shit” that I am referring to in this dialogue I have with myself almost every Sunday morning is the self-care routines that I’m supposed to fit into my very busy schedule. But for some reason, I always end up annoyed and disappointed with myself because I let myself fall into this endless cycle of not doing things that would contribute to my well being. However, this annoyance and disappointment only last so long. When Sunday comes around that means Sunday Night Dinner is in full effect!! When I see my girls on a 14
Sunday night after a hectic and stressful work week with my irritating - ass- boss and my ignorant-ass co-workers, it brings me the peace and joy I need in order to start the work week up again. Sunday Night Dinners with my friends allows us to relax in a safe space and voice our frustrations as young, gifted, and hardworking ladies. I sound a little selfish, don’t I? LOL Just know that I am focused on getting where I want to be in my life, but that path can be exhausting AF. My emotional stability literally revolves around how I feel about Fridays, Saturdays, and good ol’ Sundays. When it’s finally Friday, I get a sense of relief because there are so many moves I can make, but somehow I end up doing the same shit every weekend. On a Friday night I can do whatever I want whether it be going out to the club with my girls, inviting a guy I met during the week over so I can get laid, or just going home to drink a glass of wine while watching Viola Davis’s endless talent in “How to Get Away with Murder.” Fridays are always up for grabs. Usually, though, I’m too exhausted to do the first two options so most of the time I’m keeping it PG ( that’s Pinot Grigio) and watching Hulu. While most people love their Saturdays, I low-key dread them because it’s a day of adult chores (and they suck ass). Grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, and running errands are the things that get done on a Saturday (so much fun, right?). No disrespect to the Marshall’s candle sniffers, I just don’t enjoy spending hours hauling heavy bags up the MTA stairways filled with items on my to-do. By the time Sunday morning comes around, like every other person who has a job or goes to school, I wonder where the weekend went. Smh. That’s why I can’t wait till Sunday night. This is my version of self-care. They’re my way of ending the weekend on a high note, even if I didn’t get to do all the things I wanted to do. The energy that my friends bring to Sunday Night Dinner is just what I need to feel supported, cared for, and loved. Each of my friends is from different backgrounds from all over the country and the world. I’m of West Indian descent but I was born and raised in New York, my other friend is from Malaysia, three others are from the Philly area, and another is from New Jersey. On paper, we are quite different when it comes to our upbringings. But in true sisterhood, we’re all likeminded people with similar values and experiences. We all break bread for our Sunday Night Dinner. Someone brings or cooks the main dish and dessert, and we all have to contribute to the wine or weed of the night because that’s only fair. Being together at the end of each week gives us all a chance to let go of struggles we faced during the week that made us so angry or so joyful. We talk about any and everything. We listen to what we all have to say. It is extremely important in our self-care routine to have people we can vent and confine in.
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SHAKTIBARRE You haven’t been to an empowering fitness class until someone’s crying on their mat. Happy tears of joys of course! Founded in 2016, the yoga and dance inspired workouts are making their mark, one snatched waist line at a time. But what sets this studio apart from others is the genuine bond each teacher has with their clients. The co-founder of SHAKTIBARRE Corinne Wainer tells me that there’s a science behind - wait for it- the act of listening when attending an SB workout. This lost people skill is what creates SHAKTIBARRE’s authentic experience. Clients come in and have all types of issues going on in their day. “It’s really up to the instructors to listen and monitor everyone’s body language,” says Wainer. There are instructors who will be all up in your grill, push you to do one more crunch and then there are some that will dim the lights, turn on their Drake playlist and spend all class time talking about the path notes to a better self. Whoever’s class you’re in, expect to sweat, feel the burn, and leave empowered. SHAKTIBARRE is place to swing by before a first date to see who’s hanging out. A place to go when you just need to workout to avoid whatever life is throwing at you. Basically, if you have a membership, it’s like a cafe but make it fitness. Which brings me to my next point, the brand aims to make their classes affordable through a program called “sliding-scale,” a much more sophisticated term to use instead of saying, broke phi broke, we ain’t got it! But let’s get one thing straight. SHAKTIBARRE isn’t focused on serving Janet - the girl who comes to get her workout in with no teacher interaction, is then handed a coconut water, barely making eye contact with anyone before bolting out the door on her way to her next appointment. Wainer, as well as staff members of the community ( shoutouts to @jessicaelaine_1821, @stretchwithbetch @shauny_lamba) want to serve the client who is there to not only get a workout in, but also help build up other aspects of her life. Want to learn about Ayrevedic food, book a 15 - minutes session with SHAUNY, the other co founder who has a decade worth of yoga teacher experience. Each location is designed in their own neighborhoody -way. There’s always a jar of palo santos sticks and amethyst crystals at the front desk to purchase in all locations. With studios in Harlem, Williamsburg, Dumbo, and soon to be classes in Los Angeles ( starting July 1, yay!), SHAKTIBARRE is building an authentic community of empowered women on and off the mat. Go inside me and Corinne’s phone conversation. VSZ: You’ve been in business for a few years now, what has stayed the same? Corinne Wainer: What has stayed the same is my insatiable interest in supporting barre and yoga as tools that are so much more than a workout. When used mindfully, 29
Digital rights are human rights as well By: Melissa Henderson Where is the social invisible hand for acts of revenge porn and harassment? Here I am again, two years later to remind you about the dangers of revenge porn. I’m not about to downplay how dangerous social media has become for people who get off on bullying , harassing, acting like assholes to whoever they want. In Issue 2 of VSZ, Sanity Addiction Part 1 takes the reader on a journey of sex, drugs and hiphop shenanigans and has this emotional climatic ending that leaves readers wanting to know more about revenge porn. Since publishing the story in 2016, friends and colleagues have approached me with questions and have even filed their own lawsuits against revengeful exes. The truthfulness of the story made it go viral and leave people with many more questions. According to a PEW Study published in 2017, 41% of Americans have been personally subjected to harassing behavior online, and an even larger share (66%) have witnessed these behaviors directed at others. But. if you see something, say something! Use the report button. As we become more connected by wires and less connected by physical interactions, people seem to think that what happens online shouldn’t have offline consequences; that online threats and harsh language somehow aren’t as harmful as sticks and stones. The power lies in educating ourselves on what constitutes harmful, criminal internet interactions. The power lies with our lawmakers to protect the rights of their constituents. The power lies with victims — and witnesses — of revenge porn telling their stories evoke change which allow us all to live more free.
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The Case For Stricter Revenge Porn Laws and Why We Need To Protect Ourselves & Our Children From The Dark Web By: Melissa Henderson
An in-depth interview with Law Grad Annie Seifullah from C.A. Goldberg, a law firm that fights against the assholes, psychos, pervs and trolls who think they can get away with revenge porn, bullying and online harassment. VSZ: Congrats on graduating law school this year! What an accompliment. What type of work are you focused on at C.A. Goldberg? Annie Seifullah: Our work is focused on Victims Rights. We concentrate on the areas of sexual privacy, gender-based discrimination and gender-based violence. Our firm owner, Carrie Goldberg, was essentially the first lawyer in the country to specialize in helping victims of revenge porn aka cyber sexual assault. VSZ: This is such important work that you are doing. And it’s crazy to think that the law is JUST catching up with the harsh realities of today’s internet culture. What made you join C.A. Goldberg ? AS: My story feels like a weird fairy tale, honestly. I was the victim of a very vicious and very public act of revenge porn. (Like, front page of the New York Post level 41
of vicious and public). I lost my job and my professional reputation that I spent a decade building. Carrie was my attorney in a federal gender discrimination case that I brought against my employer, which ended in winning a settlement. At the same time I was fighting my own battle, I was putting myself through law school and learning how to be an anti-violence advocate. When I graduated, Carrie offered me a place at her firm. I feel very lucky to be working on this side of the fight. VSZ: Wow. It must have been tough but you came out on top. Respect. The best revenge for women is gettin’ money AND helping others too! How long have you been in this indiutry? AS: I just started here in March 2019, so I’m brand spanking new. (Although I have five years of experience fighting revenge porn and domestic violence from the victim side, which gives me as much expertise on these matters as the legal education in my humble opinion.) VSZ: Of course! What’s going on with the current online harassment and revenge porn laws? AS: So much exciting news here. Most states have passed law criminalizing revenge porn. The current count is 45 states, plus DC, plus one territory (Guam). New York State legislature just passed a law and we are anxiously waiting on Governor Cuomo to sign it. VSZ: This is major news! When we first covered revenge porn as a topic, there were like 39 states invested in this legislation! AS: As of May 2019, the Federal revenge porn bill (known as the SHIELD Act, formerly the ENOUGH Act) is being reintroduced for discussion in Congress. It would be so incredible to have a federal statute in place because of all the cases that involve harassment and abuse across state lines. Local police departments are often times not equipped or not willing to help with issues that include anything “cyber” or “digital.” Being able to access federal law enforcement resources could represent a huge improvement for many of our clients. VSZ: Agreed. Government should definitely mandate education around digital security and social media. What type of cases are you working on now? AS: You name it, we’ve worked on it! Once Governor Cuomo signs the revenge porn bill in New York State, I imagine that we will see an increase in cases that we able to bring statewide. But we don’t just take New York state cases. We have clients all over the country and even other parts of the world who need help with various issues relating to sexual privacy, cyber harassment, sextortion, gender-based violence and discrimination, and any form of sexual violence and exploitation. VSZ: I can imagine...being as though it’s so common yet so few resources Revenge 42
porn is HUGE in the urban / hip hop community, check out this interview with Love & Hip Hop Star and Singer Tierra Marie who opened up about her own bout with revenge porn, why are so many situations not challenged? AS: This is so complicated. Generally, sex and gender-based violence disproportionately affects women, people of color, and LGBT folks. I venture that if this was a problem severely impacting the lives and livelihood of rich, white cis-men our outcomes would be far better. VSZ: Exactly. It’s so de facto, yet we’re still playing catchup with the laws. Plus victims don’t feel safe telling their story to the law as a victim because they aren’t believed. AS: So many times, the victim of revenge porn (cyber sex assault) are told that they are at fault for what happened to them. “You shouldn’t have taken those photos” or “If you hadn’t shared that video with him this never would have happened.” Can you imagine if a rich man walked into a police station and said “I’d like to report a crime. A crazy person stole my Mercedes Benz!” And the police responded, “Well that’s what you get for driving such a fancy car. You were sort of asking for it, am I right?” IT. WOULD. NOT. HAPPEN. VSZ: It’s also sad that people’s negative opinions come from fear and disregard of human sexual tendencies. AS: The reason there is a lack of support for victims of revenge porn is tough to pinpoint but is, sadly, predictable and highly intersectional. When a crime primarily affects women and involves sexuality, then women are traditionally blamed. And when you add elements of race, class, sexual orientation or gender expression – folks become even more marginalized. That marginalization shows up in a variety of ways, including lack of support from law enforcement, lack of support from church or family, and even loss of employment opportunities. (For me, I had support of my local law enforcement because the NYPD actually believed me and arrested my abuser. But the Queens DA declined to prosecute so the case went nowhere. I had tons of support from my church and family. But my employer famously pushed me out, pressured me to resign, and manufactured reasons to justify firing me – hence my federal gender discrimination lawsuit. AND I’M A SYSTEM SAVVY WHITE LADY. Imagine if I was not white, or if I was poor, or if I didn’t speak English well, or if I didn’t have college education? Do you think I would have been afforded opportunities for such a comeback? Obviously, this is a rhetorical question, but the answer is likely, no). I hear what you’re saying about revenge porn being really prevalent in urban/hip hop communities. I’ve been part of many conversations directed at answering this exact 43
question and dilemma. And I’m sure there are all sorts of folks who would like to blame the problem on Hip Hop culture’s history of misogyny. But you and I both know that misogyny did not spring out of Hip Hop. And women of color are more likely to be blamed or completely ignored when they are victims of sex crimes due to the racism and sexism embedded in cultures of power. VSZ: As a philosophical question, why are people so indulgent in gossip, public
But you and I both know that misogyny did not spring out of Hip Hop. And women of color are more likely to be blamed or completely ignored when they are victims of sex crimes due to the racism and sexism embedded in cultures of power. humiliation? AS: I wish I knew the answer to this question. Having been the target of gossip and public humiliation myself, I think that most people just aren’t aware of the real damage that it causes. People are cruel online in a way that they just aren’t cruel in real life circumstances. Working with victims of various walks of life has taught me that after experiencing public and humiliating trauma, people often develop a sense of empathy and kindness towards others that they did not have before. I think if more people had a moment to feel the pain and unfairness of being publicly judged and humiliated – there would be less of it in the world. VSZ: Around 2013/2014… You’ve experienced revenge porn which has ultimately inspired you to become a lawyer… How was the current socio-political climate back then compared to now? AS: The climate right now is slightly more sympathetic to victims, although we still have a long way to go. Five years ago, when I was a school principal and photos of me in my underwear were published in the New York Post the general vibe was “How can you be an educator after your students have seen those photos?!” Compare that to two months ago, when Long Island teacher Lauren Miranda was fired after her topless photo was publicly distributed. If you take a scan of the headlines, you’ll see that the public perception and outcry is far more sympathetic towards her having those photos and I am glad for her that she seems to be getting a better treatment by the public at large. I am hopeful that some of the work Carrie and our network of activist warriors have done over the last five years helped to make the climate better for victims like Lauren Miranda. We still have a long way to go. 44
VSZ: What do you know now as a professional lawyer in this line of work as opposed to what you didn’t know back then when you were deep in shit? AS: Oh girl, the things I WISH I KNEW. I was being abused, extorted, manipulated, stolen from, gaslighted. The list goes on. At the time I just thought, this is a mean guy and a bad relationship and after we breakup we will both move on with our lives. I thought, this is just what happens in some relationships. I was so wrong! He was a criminal, committing abusive and illegal acts against me. And I thought because I wasn’t perfect that I somehow deserved it. VSZ: The feelings are mutual. AS: I wish that I had called a lawyer or reached out to women’s rights group or a victim’s support network or His greatest ANYTHING before he made good on his threats to make weapon against my private photos public. His greatest weapon against me was my silence. I stayed quiet because I was ashamed. me was my The public figure that I was (smart, strong, good leader) silence. was completely out of line with who I was in my personal relationship and I was not speaking the truth out loud, not asking for help out loud, like I should have been. The only thing I can hope is that The only thing I can hope is women will hear my story and speak out and stand up to their abusers sooner than that women will hear my story I did. and speak out and stand up to
their abusers sooner than I did.
VSZ: Exactly. After I told my story was published in the UK Daily Mail, I felt a little ashamed because the way the writer framed it. But then a few women in my network started telling me their stories and why colleague even pressed chargers on an exe because she read my story! So that made me feel powerful and also cope with the after effects. What challenges / issues are KEY to protecting women’s rights online? AS: Legal scholar Danielle Citron has been publishing some really good work lately about technological due process and the need for an online bill of rights to protect people’s civil rights in the digital world. The rise of the internet is something that the founding fathers and civil rights leaders in our country’s history could never have predicted. Citron’s arguments that new times call for new civil rights is really compelling. Part of the real difficulty is that most reasonable people understand that the internet and online behavior needs to be regulated in a way that it isn’t currently being regulated. But most of the people making the decisions are tech executives -- or decision makers and advocacy organizations that get money and funding from Big Tech. The people who are targeted the most with online violence are women, queer folks, and people of color. So it requires constant and loud activism and storytelling to draw attention to protecting people’s rights online. 45
SPECIAL THANKS AngĂŠlica Fuentes & A Complete Skincare for supporting Issue 5 66
CREDITS Ponte La Pilas Photoshoot: Photographer : @ju_wels ( Julianny Casado ) Influencer: @sunflowervalentine ( Valentina Nazareth Padilla Soteldo ) STYLE BY PONTE LAS PILAS Josmary Remache y Estefany Lรณpez
Andrea Iyamah Bridal Photography: Photographer: @mannyjefferson BTS Videographer: @pitsonmedia Models: @queenkaylie1 / @nafeesa_butu Makeup: @switchcosmetics Hairstylist: @dicksongeorge50 Art Director: @willyverse Stylist: @vcheuba Location: @legendhotellagosairport
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