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Everyone Hates the Science Fair by Helen Chappell

Well, not everyone hates science fairs, but I sure did. And I blame my high school biology teacher, who will be called Mr. Peaches for the purpose of this memoir. Although it’s unlikely, he might still be alive and still boring generations of kids with his monotone voice and his thinly disguised religious views, and I don’t want to get sued. I do know what osmosis is, and as far as he was concerned, I wasn’t having any of it.

You would think, growing up with a father who was a surgeon, where dinner-table conversation often involved graphic descriptions of whatever operations my Silver Haired Daddy had performed that day, I’d be all about high school biology. After all, if you were eating fried ham steak, green beans, applesauce and overbaked Pillsbury biscuits while the Old Man regaled us with how he’d removed eight feet of diseased intestine from a patient,