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Zebra Ink

The magazine that empowers January 2024

Letter From The Editor Hello Dazzle!

It is an incredible bargain for you if you are interested in selfpublishing.

eing the first issue of 2024, I would be remiss if I didn’t wish you a happy and healthy New Year. My wish is that 2023 was one you can reflect fondly upon, and that 2024 manifests all the promise for a spectacular year. I also want to thank you for being here and sharing this blessing of a magazine. Your support is greatly appreciated.

As always, if you have a story to share, please check out our join page. You can absolutely contribute for free, or you can join one of the membership levels and reap all the benefits. I am looking for submissions of poetry, recipes, short stories, non-profit stories, artwork, and photography. Let’s celebrate the courage of creativity together and get you published!

This issue is packed with a variety of topics that I am confident you will enjoy. We have a return visit from Robert Merlo who extends Live Messy to Community, Karen McMillan who shares a new year visioning tool with us, Joie Gharrity shares the motivation for her SWE Media Network, and Val Woods shares the symptoms of a heart attack and prevention methods for heart disease.

As the new year begins, I believe that the best resolutions we can make are to judge less, be kind, offer support and to ask for help when we need it. If we all made a conscious effort to work on those areas – imagine the world we could live in. Let’s do it together!

We have plenty of new contributors too! Each article is special, but there is one I definitely want you to read and act upon if you can. Birgit Stubblefield shares information about how to become a live kidney donor. Her son has been diagnosed with end stage kidney disease and desperately needs a new kidney. If there is any way you can help, please do. Please be sure to visit the Marketplace to see the new books that are being released and products that are new to us. Buying books, purchasing products, or listening to podcasts that are suggested in the marketplace helps small business owners to spread their message. What they make for you can change your life and your support changes theirs. If you haven’t checked it out yet, I invite you to visit the Zebra Ink website. Please explore the Zebra Ink Directory of Storytellers. If you are looking for speakers or resource providers, please be sure to look at the directory first before you look elsewhere. They have excellent resources available to you in their profiles and links for you to contact them. You might even want to consider becoming a member of the Directory yourself. Why – well there are a bunch of reasons, but my favorite one is all the resources in the Resource Library to help you market yourself and build your platform. In the ELEVATE Level we even have a monthly call to talk about all things platform building. We will also have an additional call each quarter to talk about Self-Publishing. I have put all my Self-Publishing guides and templates (there are over twenty of them) in there to access as part of that membership level. 2

Happy reading –

Sheila Kennedy Editor and Publisher of Zebra Ink Magazine https://www.thezebraink.com/home

January 2024

Contents Letter From The Editor.. . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .2

Issue designed by Jackie Zimmerman, Queen of GSD

It starts with a simple phone call.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .4 Rebirth in Motherhood: A Story of Crisis, Courage, and Connection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 An Accidental Artist.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8 Living Messy: The Art of Building Community . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .10 Life is a Ride.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .12 Be the CEO of Your Life . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .14 YINpreneurs do things differently!.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 Not Just Responders …Creating a Heart Healthy Community.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .18 A Cookie Tradition . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20 Affirmations.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .22 Empowering Women Entrepreneurs: Next-Level Success In Just 15-Minutes.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23 Courageous is Spelled MARIAM . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24 Loneliness? An Unlikely Lifeline.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 Entrepreneurs Addressing Challenges Faced by Communities and Families . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .28 The Million Dollar Soup.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30 Unconditional love.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 Become a contributor to Zebra Ink Magazine!!.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .34 Self Publishing Roadmap.. . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .35 Marketplace.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .36

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QueenofGSD.com

It starts with a simple phone call B.K. STUBBLEFIELD

Dear Reader and Community of Hope,

I am reaching out to you today with a mother’s heart, heavy with worry, yet filled with hope for human kindness and medical miracles that could change the course of our son Chris’s life. Chris was recently diagnosed with end-stage kidney disease. This news has shaken our world to its core, and while we are still grappling with the reality of it, time is not on our side. December 28th marked the beginning of urgentstart peritoneal dialysis. This procedure is a testament to the severity of his condition. It is not a cure but a temporary lifeline, giving us precious time to find a more permanent solution—a kidney transplant.

CHRIS STUBBLEFIELD

The journey ahead is daunting. The list for a kidney transplant is long, and every day we wait, Chris’s health is declining. Therefore, I am reaching out to all of you. We are searching for a living kidney donor who might give Chris a chance at a healthier, longer life. If you or anyone you know is Blood Type O, under the age of 50, in good general health, and ever considered the possibility of donating a kidney, I implore you to get in touch with the University of Kentucky Transplant Center at 859323-2467. Your courage could transform Chris’s life and the lives of all who love him. But even if you are not a match for him, there is a remarkable avenue for hope I wish to share with you. The Kidney Paired Exchange is a transformative program that allows incompatible donors to still donate their kidney. In exchange, Chris receives a compatible kidney from another donor in the network. This ‘exchange’ creates a chain of giving that not only benefits the initial pair but can also save multiple lives in a domino effect of generosity and hope. By raising awareness of his incredible program, we aim not only to find a match for Chris but also to illuminate this option for others who may find themselves in a similar position. If you are considering donating a kidney to Chris but are incompatible (Blood Type or other factors) or if you simply want to give the gift of life, the Kidney Paired Exchange can be a powerful way to extend your impact. We understand the decision to donate an organ is profound and personal. Whether you are a potential donor or someone who can amplify our message, your involvement might be the key to unlocking a new chapter of health and joy for Chris and many others. The University of Kentucky’s Transplant team, equipped with knowledge and compassion, guides donors and recipients through this process, ensuring the best possible outcomes for all involved. Donors do not incur any medical costs.

You have the power to be part of a story of survival and hope that’s transcends individual struggles. Even if donation is not a possibility for you, I would be grateful if you could share our story. Thank you for considering this message of hope and for any support you can lend. And above all, thank you for your compassion and your kindness. It is a beacon of light in this difficult time. With sincere gratitude and hope, Birgit Stubblefield

To get tested as a potential donor, please reach out to: University of Kentucky Transplant Center Ph. 859-323-2467

General Information on Living Donation Living donation takes place when a living person donates an organ (or part of an organ) for transplantation to another person. The living donor can be a family member, such as a parent, child, brother or sister (living related donation). Living donation can also come from someone who doesn’t have an emotional relationship with the recipient, such as a friend of a friend, coworker, fellow member at their place of worship, neighbor or someone that hears through social media. Thanks to improved medications, a genetic link between the donor and recipient is no longer required to ensure a successful transplant. You don’t even need to have the same blood type as your potential donor to get a kidney because there are internal paired exchange programs within transplant centers and national paired exchange programs that allow an incompatible pair to match up with another incompatible pair; allowing the two donors to switch recipients. What organs can come from living donors? The organ most commonly given by a living donor is the kidney. Parts of other organs including the lung, liver and pancreas are now being transplanted from living donors. Who can be a living kidney donor? You must be at least 18 years old at all transplant centers. Some centers require a donor to be 21 or a little older. There are some medical conditions that could prevent you from being a living donor. These include having uncontrolled high blood pressure, diabetes, cancer, HIV, hepatitis, or acute infections. You should always let the transplant center decide if you can be a living donor.

B.K. Stubblefield, a dog-loving writer from Germany, now calls Kentucky home. Settled in Elizabethtown, she draws inspiration from the slower pace of smalltown living, crafting the Oak Creek series. Her passion for dogs shines through her heartfelt stories. Visit her website at https://bkstubblefield.com/.

Are transplants from living donors always successful? Although transplantation is highly successful, and success rates continue to improve, there is still a small chance that problems may occur. Sometimes, the kidney is lost to rejection, surgical complications or the original disease that caused the recipient’s kidney to fail. Talk to the transplant center staff about their success rates and the national success rates. Source: https://www.kidney.org/transplantation/ livingdonors/general-information-living-donation 5

Rebirth in Motherhood: A Story of Crisis, Courage, and Connection ALEYA HARRIS

died on November 7, 2022. It was the day my daughter, Ruby postpartum depression. I could help others feel seen and Coral, was born, marking my transition into motherhood. understood. It was supposed to be a joyous occasion, but instead, it became the start of the most challenging period of my life. Now, I share my story from the stage, and it continues to resonate. I have fond memories of stepping out of the spotlight I gave birth after enduring 36 hours of labor, which culminated to embrace tearful audience members thanking me for being in a C-section. There I was, holding my beautiful daughter, yet so empathetic to their lived experiences. It’s a reminder that feeling as if a part of me had vanished. During my picture- the prevailing narrative of motherhood often overlooks the perfect pregnancy, nobody warned me about the intensity complex emotions many women experience. It’s not just about of postpartum depression and anxiety. It was a full-body being happy to have a healthy baby. It’s about acknowledging experience; my brain, emotions, body, and soul hurt. I was and accepting the myriad feelings that come with the transition caught in a whirlwind of emotions: joy for my new baby and a from maiden to mother. deep, unshakable sadness. This journey has taught me the power of vulnerability. By I struggled with the transition. The image of a happy, glowing sharing my story, I’ve not only healed myself but have also new mother clashed violently with the reality of my experience. provided a space for others to heal. I’ve learned that in moments I felt ashamed of my feelings, as if I was failing at the very first of crisis, there’s an opportunity for growth, for rebirth. And in step of motherhood. This internal conflict was compounded by this new chapter of my life, as I navigate the complexities of a practical crisis: as a business owner, my mental state directly motherhood, I carry with me the lessons of empathy, courage, impacted my work. My revenue dwindled, adding financial and the strength found in community. stress to my already heavy burden. It was on March 28, 2023, that I chose to share my story. I posted a raw and honest reflection of my journey on Instagram. The post spoke of the death of my former self and the birth of this new, uncertain version of me. It was a vulnerable moment, one that I was nervous to share, fearing judgment and misunderstanding. The response, however, was overwhelmingly positive. Women reached out to me, sharing their own struggles with postpartum depression, grateful to know they were not alone. Men thanked me for giving voice to what their partners were experiencing. People lauded my bravery. From this act of sharing, I found a community—a group of people who uplifted me as I uplifted them. It was a healing experience, both for myself and for others. On July 19, I posted another update. Accompanied by a photo of me holding Ruby Coral, I opened up about the hard truths of my journey. I talked about my struggle with postpartum depression, the loss of my ‘glow,’ and how it affected my business. I shared how energy healing techniques, therapy, and intentional rest and movement helped me find my way back. This post was not just an update; it was a beacon of hope for others in similar situations. Through these posts, I made a choice. I chose to share my story because the importance of connection, and helping others, outweighed the discomfort of vulnerability. I realized that by sharing my story, I could help break the stigma surrounding

Aleya Harris, CPCE is the spark for your sparkTM. She is an award-winning international speaker, powerhouse StoryBrand Certified Guide, Strategic Storytelling Consultant, empire-building CEO of The Evolution Collective Inc., and host of the award-winning Flourishing Entrepreneur Podcast. Aleya helps business leaders overcome communication and differentiation challenges by sharing radically authentic stories that transform workplace culture and carve unique market niches. https://www.aleyaharris.com/ 7

I An

wasn’t supposed to be an artist.

Accidental Artist KEN LONG

And for most of my life, I wasn’t. Oh, I had made some art in school, just like you. But my kindergarten teacher sent a note home to my parents because the violent nature of my army battle pictures was a cause for concern. And in junior high, the superhero parody comics I drew in the back of the class, when I should have been taking notes, were sometimes confiscated. That accounted for most of my art experience for the first sixty-plus years of my life. I had no formal art training beyond eighth grade and never took an art appreciation class. I wasn’t supposed to be an artist. And then I was. It happened slowly, a few years after digital cameras came out. I bought a Canon point-and-shoot camera with zoom. Suddenly, I could take photos and see what I had taken without having to wait for prints to be developed, and then I could share the photos electronically. Easy-to-use editing software also became available at the same time. I sometimes supersaturated the photos I took to make the colors pop and give the image a painting-like quality. I posted some of these on Facebook and got positive feedback on them from friends and family. A few years later, the first publicly available “deep dream” neural net software was introduced. This enabled me to combine a photo I took (the base image) with a second image (the style image) to create a composite of the two that was a new beast entirely. A few examples of this accompany this article. When I began to post these processed images on Facebook, I got even more positive feedback and then, surprisingly, requests to buy them. This eventually led me to create my own small business, River PhotoCraft, which today generates annual revenue in the thousands. I wasn’t supposed to be an artist, and maybe you weren’t either.

After the rain 8

But you can be one if you want. Really. All it takes is the desire and a bit of effort. Try lots of different things. Make lots of mistakes. You don’t have to show them to anyone. Eventually you’ll make something you like. If you’re lucky, others will too. But if they don’t, that’s okay. Consider what Kurt Vonnegut said on the subject: “Go into the arts. I’m not kidding. The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven’s sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories. Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possibly can. You will get an enormous reward. You will have created something.” Grace

I became an artist accidentally, rediscovering the joy I found drawing exploding bombs and soldiers when I was five, sixty years later when I began to take and alter photographs digitally. There’s no one way to become an artist. Whatever path leads you there is a good one.

Tree at Sunset

Foxtrot India Sierra hotel Ken Long, who lives in Rocky River, Ohio, specializes in creating processed and composite photographic images. His work has been displayed at such places as BAYarts, the Carlisle Art Gallery, and the Rocky River Nature Center. You can find more of Ken’s work at https://www.facebook.com/riverphotocraft and contact him at riverphotocraft@outlook.com.

Living Messy: The Art of Building Community ROBERT MERLO

n the age of curated Instagram feeds and meticulously crafted personal brands, there’s a growing sense of longing for the authentic, the real, and the unfiltered. It’s the messy and unscripted moments of life that resonate most deeply with us, reminding us of our shared humanity. As we strive for perfection, there’s something profoundly liberating about embracing imperfection, both in ourselves and in our communities. To ‘live messy’ is to build communities that thrive on shared experiences, where individuals come together, support one another, and learn and grow as a collective. In this essay, we will explore the art of ‘living messy’ by building community, celebrating the beauty in our flaws and forging connections that defy the boundaries of curated perfection.

opportunities for personal development. It is within this mess that we discover our resilience, adaptability, and the beauty of transformation.

The Allure of the Messy

Conclusion: The Art of Embracing Messiness

The allure of the messy lies in its unpredictability, its rawness, and its ability to draw people together. It is in these imperfections that we find solace, authenticity, and an opportunity for genuine human connection. The sterile landscapes of social media can be beautifully crafted, but they often lack the depth and substance of a life lived fully, replete with trials and tribulations. Living messy, in the context of building community, means embracing these imperfections as opportunities rather than failures.

The Unspoken Benefits of Living Messy

The benefits of ‘living messy’ by building community go beyond the individuals involved. In an age of heightened divisiveness and isolation, these communities have the power to bridge divides and foster understanding. They become the microcosms of a better world, where diversity is not a source of discord but a wellspring of enrichment. In embracing the messy, we embrace the richness of the human experience.

In a world that often values the polished over the authentic, there is an undeniable longing for something more genuine. The art of ‘living messy’ by building community offers us a path to embrace the beauty in imperfection, to cherish shared experiences, to support one another unconditionally, and to continually learn and grow. It is an art that celebrates our humanity and, in doing so, enriches our lives in ways that perfection and isolation never can.

In the grand tapestry of life, it is the messy threads that make the most captivating and enduring stories. These are the Shared Experiences: The Glue That Binds A community built on the principles of living messy finds stories that connect us, inspire us, and remind us that life is its strength in shared experiences. These experiences, be not a series of picture-perfect moments but a vibrant mosaic they moments of joy, sadness, or struggle, are the threads of emotions, experiences, and connections. To ‘live messy’ is that weave the fabric of a community. They create empathy, to truly live and to build communities that resonate with the understanding, and a profound sense of belonging. When we very essence of our shared humanity. In doing so, we discover acknowledge our shared humanity, we create a space where we that imperfection is not a blemish; it is the brushstroke that can relate to one another, even when our stories differ. Shared completes the masterpiece. experiences remind us that we are not alone in our messiness.

Supporting One Another

Building a messy community is not merely about celebrating the chaos; it’s also about offering a supportive hand when needed. The essence of this support lies in its sincerity and absence of judgment. When we extend kindness and empathy, we allow for vulnerability, and that is where true connection occurs. In these communities, individuals lift one another up, not in spite of their flaws, but because of them.

Learning and Growing Together

Living messy by building community is an ongoing journey. It’s about learning from our collective experiences and growing together as individuals and as a group. It’s recognizing that, in the messiness of life, there are valuable lessons and

A graduate of the University of Rochester and the Charles H. Lundquist College of Business at the University of Oregon, Robert Merlo is employed in the Ed Tech Industry. He lives in Rochester, New York with his wife, a 3rd-grade teacher, and their 13-year-old daughter. Find out more about Robert on Linked In. 11

Life is a Ride It starts with a first breath, and then with a cry. It ends with a last breath on the day you die. And in between life is a ride. -from the song “Life is a Ride” Paul Sanchez wrote the music, Chris Joseph and Alex McMurray wrote lyrics

n late October of 2016, I was diagnosed with stage III pancreatic cancer. I thought I was fucked. This is my story of dealing with the physical and emotional fallout of a cancer diagnosis. It’s a story of tremendous fear. Of deep emotional pain. Of anguish, wondering how soon I was going to die and how painful my death would be. And it’s also a story of courage while fighting fear. Of independence. Of putting one foot in front of the other. Of daring to be different and not following conventional wisdom. Of perseverance. It’s a story of connection. Of love. Of redemption. Of getting knocked down and finding a way to pick myself up off the mat. Most of all, it’s a story of beating the odds and getting healthy. **** A man who introduced himself as a radiologist entered the room where I had been nervously sitting and fidgeting impatiently for more than 30 minutes. With a solemn face he bluntly said, “Sorry to give you the bad news...we found a mass in your pancreas.”

Whatever he told me after that, I didn’t hear. It was as if someone had hit the mute button. All I could see was that 12

CHRIS JOSEPH

he was still talking, but there wasn’t any I made no connection between the sound coming out of his mouth. depression and what I thought was a stomach virus. He came unmuted at the end to say, “Talk to Doctor Mossgale. You can go On October 28, I visited Dr. Mossgale. home.” He ordered some blood work for the lab, probed around my stomach and A routine visit to get some medical tests abdomen and then suggested I get had turned into a calamity. some scans “to make sure everything is okay.” What he didn’t tell me was he **** felt something in my abdomen during It started as an innocent and typical his examination. He suggested I get a Southern California sunny day. CT scan and an ultrasound and wrote a A Monday. The 31st of October, prescription for me. Halloween Day. 2016. I was 59. In the mid-afternoon of that Halloween That Monday morning was like most Day, I drove by myself to the imaging other school mornings. I woke my kids center in Santa Monica, not far from my up, made sure they were fed, got them house. off to their school and then started my I wasn’t worried at all. I was still workday. My kids, Jasper and AJ, were 14 convinced that I had nothing more than and 12 at the time. a lingering virus and that with the passage of time and maybe some supplements For all of that October and the latter part and temporary dietary changes, I would of September, I had been experiencing be healed. some abdominal discomfort. I figured it was a lingering stomach bug. The After the ultrasound, I waited for the discomfort was nagging me, but it second test. And waited. And waited. certainly didn’t scream to me that Longer than a “normal” wait. Thirty to something was seriously wrong. Finally, 40 minutes went by. in late October, I decided to have it checked by Dr. Mossgale. Getting restless and impatient, I asked the front desk person what was going on. I had also, for maybe three to four months She went back and talked to someone, prior to October 31, been suffering from then came back and told me the first of some major depression. This was strange many unforgettable things I heard that because my life was pretty good. Work day. was thriving, my girlfriend, Susie, and I had righted the ship after a hiccup the “We need to contact your regular doctor year before and my kids were doing well. because we want to run some additional tests that he didn’t order.” I had no apparent reason to be deeply I could feel my heart pounding. depressed during this period. For several weeks, there were many times I had Finally, the imaging staff ushered me contemplated ending my life. I couldn’t in for whatever additional tests they figure out why I felt this way, and I was wanted to run along with the CT scan too depressed and too ashamed of being I’d been waiting for. depressed to tell anyone or to seek help.

After those tests, they had me wait. This time, I was in a private room. Maybe another 30 minutes went by. This was out of the realm of normal.

As soon as she answered, I burst into tears. But this even worse than my conversation with Susie. Carmen immediately saw that I was very upset and crying. Instantly, I could see that **** she was scared and assumed she thought At the imaging center the radiologist maybe something had happened to one walked in with his sad face and his bad of our kids. news, and after hearing “mass in your Sensing Carmen’s fear, I said, “It’s me, it’s pancreas” and going deaf, I left. me!” I departed not knowing much. I didn’t know if it meant I had tumors elsewhere And then I told her what was going on. in my body. The only thing I knew was She, too, was stunned. “Should I come that they found this thing—a mass—in home?” she asked. I didn’t know what to tell her. my pancreas. I went into full-bore panic. It was a fear As I got out of the car and took the short that I had never experienced before. I walk to the front door of my house, I was thinking a million thoughts, none was having trouble breathing. good. My dad had been diagnosed with I stepped into my car and started crying lung cancer in late 1985 and was dead hysterically. It was about 3 pm and I less than four months later. I wasn’t even needed to get home to take my boys to sure I was going to survive four months. their respective Halloween functions. My ex-wife, Carmen, was visiting her I walked into my house and the boys and boyfriend in Australia, so I couldn’t ask I quickly gathered together. I told them what I knew, but I gave them an edited her to help with the kids. version. And I was sobbing when I told them. And then they started crying. First, I called Susie. She was stunned. Telling my boys was the most difficult What could she say? When most of us conversation of my entire life. hear anything about pancreatic cancer, we think it’s a death sentence. So much Later that night, I received a call from so that it’s the go-to cancer screenwriters Dr. Mossgale. The radiologist had sent use when they want to write a character him the scan results. Dr. Mossgale said out of a show. Why is it the cancer of he would give me recommendations choice for killing off a character? The for oncologists the next day. When five-year survival rate for people with I asked him what I could or should pancreatic cancer is 10 percent. Most are do in the interim, he said yet another dead within a year. unforgettable thing I heard that day. As Susie grappled with what she had just learned, she unsuccessfully tried to calm me down. “Well, you don’t know what this means,” she said. “Maybe it’s not as serious as it sounds.” **** Before I arrived home, I video-called Carmen.

“Chris, I think you need to pray.” I was like, What the fuck!?!?!?! What I learned a few weeks later was that Dr. Mossgale knew about as much as I did that night: that I had a tumor, a mass in my pancreas. He didn’t know the type, the severity or anything else.

But let me tell you: when Dr. Mossgale suggested that I pray, I was even more convinced that I wouldn’t be around much longer. I thought I was done. And I was experiencing a paralyzing fear of suffering a painful, too-soon-to-die death combined with the sadness that I was not going to live long enough to see my kids grow up. My cancer adventure had begun.

Chris Joseph is a dad, environmental consultant, cancer patient advocate, best-selling author, thought leader, public speaker, and founder of two music record companies and a complementary 501(c)(3) nonprofit helping New Orleans artists and musicians. He’s also a television producer, hobbyist songwriter, podcaster, and a lover of all things outdoors. Chris’s first book was the best seller, Life is a Ride: My Unconventional Journey of Cancer Recovery (2020). He then co-authored, The Epiphanies Project and is currently finalizing his third book, The Kitchen Sink Approach to Cancer (And Why You SHOULDN’T Always Listen to Your Doctor). Find out more at @ chrisjoseph_author | Linktree 13

Be the CEO of Your Life KELLY METRAS & KELLY BUSH

elcome to the world of BOSSY with Kelly Bush and Kelly Metras. BOSSY and BOSSing are small business owner support groups that we co-founded in 2014. We each became a boss in 2010 & 2011 respectfully, and quickly realized that being the CEO is often an isolating position, but it doesn’t have to be. BOSSY was the first step in connecting small business owners in a real, raw, and honest space. The second step was Getting Real with BOSSY, the podcast about what it’s really like to own business. These attributes are not always taught, and many people don’t realize that they may need practice to become proficient in them. It is often assumed that business owners are a separate breed and just “know” what they are doing. When in reality, we struggle just like everyone else! Running a successful business requires a unique set of skills and characteristics. Interestingly, many of these skills seamlessly transfer into the fabric of daily life, shaping how business owners approach challenges, make decisions, and navigate relationships. Let’s get real and dive into applying these skills in your everyday life.

Strategic Thinking:

Business owners are adept at strategic thinking, constantly analyzing market trends, competitors, and opportunities everywhere that they go. This skill manifests in the ability to plan and set goals effectively in everyday life. Whether it’s planning a family vacation or deciding on personal development objectives, having a strategic mindset plays a pivotal role in achieving your goals.

Decision-Making:

Decisiveness is a hallmark of successful business owners. In our personal lives, decisions abound, from choosing a career path to making everyday choices about health and wellness. Business owners leverage their decision-making skills to weigh options, assess risks, and commit to choices, fostering a sense of empowerment and direction in both professional and personal domains. Even if that decision

is to let someone else plan your vacation! Knowing your bring these skills into their personal lives. Efficient time boundaries and acknowledging your unique needs leads to a management allows for a balanced and fulfilling life, more seamless decision-making process. encompassing work, leisure, and personal growth. We often hear “How do you manage it all?” and the answer is time management and organization! Adaptability: The business landscape is dynamic, and adaptability is crucial for survival. Business owners often find themselves navigating unforeseen challenges and pivoting strategies. Yes, pivot was a business word before the pandemic! This adaptability spills over into personal life, helping us cope with change, whether it be a career shift, relocation, or unexpected life events. We are used to fluctuation, so it isn’t quite as scary. Adaptability is necessary but it takes practice and patience. Effective communication: Clear communication is a cornerstone of successful business operations. Business owners excel at conveying ideas, expectations, and feedback. In daily life, effective communication enhances relationships, ensuring that individuals articulate their thoughts, needs, and emotions with clarity and empathy, fostering understanding and harmony. This is used to navigate interpersonal relationships, whether shopping in a store or dealing with our familial relationships.

Financial Literacy:

Resilience:

The entrepreneurial journey is fraught with challenges, requiring resilience in the face of setbacks. This resilience extends into personal life, helping individuals bounce back from disappointments, setbacks, and adversity. The ability to persevere and maintain a positive mindset becomes a guiding force in overcoming obstacles. The integration of business owner skills into everyday life creates a holistic and purpose-driven approach. Strategic thinking, decision-making, adaptability, effective communication, financial literacy, leadership, time management, and resilience collectively contribute to a well-rounded and empowered individual. But all of these attributes take practice and intention. As business owners seamlessly navigate the intersection of professional and personal spheres, the skills acquired in entrepreneurship become invaluable tools for a fulfilling and successful life. Don’t forget … you are the CEO of your life!

Managing finances is a core skill for any business owner. This expertise extends beyond the business realm, empowering individuals to make informed financial decisions in Follow us @bossyroc, and listen to amazing stories of resilience their personal lives. From budgeting and investment to through our podcast, Getting Real with BOSSY at bossyroc. understanding the implications of loans and mortgages, com/podcast. financial literacy acquired in the business world is a valuable asset for personal financial success. For many business owners, Kelly Bush and Kelly Metras started BOSSY in 2014 understanding the fluctuations in seasonal sales allows us to after meeting together to navigate the ups and downs understand how to successfully navigate the uncertain cash of owning a business as a woman. Deciding to share the flow of life-- Planning, budgeting, and forecasting in both empowerment felt after their meetups, BOSSY was born personal and business worlds. from a random happy hour that left a group of 30 women wanting to continue the feeling of empowerment and camaraderie. Leadership: Business owners are natural leaders, steering their teams The leadership duo consists of Kelly Bush co-owns towards shared objectives. In personal life, leadership skills Marshall Street Bar and Grill and the Union Tavern, contribute to effective parenting, community involvement, and is the owner of K & B Consulting. Kelly Metras, and collaborative efforts within families and social circles. co-owner of Salena’s Mexican Restaurant, is a pessimistic Leadership qualities such as inspiration, delegation, and optimist who believes it is the job of local business owners conflict resolution become integral in creating positive to improve their communities. To learn more about environments. And remember, leadership is not controlling, BOSSY, please visit https://www.bossyroc.com/ it is guiding.

Time Management:

The business world demands effective time management to meet deadlines and achieve goals. Business owners, adept at prioritizing tasks, scheduling, and optimizing productivity, 15

YINpreneurs do things differently!

KAREN MCMILLAN

What is a YINpreneur™you ask? Allow me to introduce you… First, meet my younger self in late 2008. After a decade in corporate management and two years attaining International Coach Federation certification, I followed the crowd to search for my coaching “niche.” I searched for tools and coaches aligned with heart-centered, conscious, right-brain, and divine feminine business-building practices. I believed I was ready to build a life of creative freedom as a solopreneur. Fast forward two years to a Winter Saturday in 2010, the afternoon of my annual “Awaken Your Success Goddess” virtual retreat. Back then we met by phone, meditating, journaling, and visioning together for 2-3 hours. During this retreat, the word “YINpreneur” came to me. I was not yet clear on the full meaning, yet the term spoke to me and aligned with my love of yoga, Buddhism, the Tao, feminine energy, ancient wisdom, and modern practice. This comfort allowed me to overlook feelings of doubt. I knew that not everyone would relate, yet believed those who did would be my community. At a minimum, the term was unique, showed up well in SEO searches, and may be easy to trademark. I figured the rest would reveal itself over time and for sure it did. The more I lived with this new concept, the more I realized it was less about “WHAT is a YINpreneur?” and more about “WHO is a YINpreneur?” More about the being than the doing. I continued my sacred practices listening deeply to intuitive messages to align traditional, corporate marketing with this new YINpreneur feeling and perspective. Yet, each day I became more uncomfortable and less aligned with the patriarchal language, tools, tone, and intentions of the so-called “six-figure coaches.” Instead of propelling me forward, I was spending energy but making small or sporadic steps. The dream of an aligned entrepreneurial life was waning. The rules and tools of the patriarchy did not feel right. The language was corporate vs creative, and the tools had hard edges. Really hard edges. I like soft edges, spirals, and a non-linear way of working - which I’ve come to know as the “way of the YINpreneur.”

Karen McMillan, ACC | YINpreneur™ With passion for bringing together BIPOC artists, solopreneurs, light workers, and change-makers, Karen intuitively guides others to find and own their voice. Revealing their gifts so that they may share them forward in support of the world they wish to create. As the founder and creator of YINpreneur Village™ and Virtual RetreatU™, Karen invites women to practice the way of the YINpreneur™ via wisdom journeys and experiences in safe, collaborative spaces.

Traditional vs YINpreneur Tools It became apparent that the traditional tools were created for people who worked for and reported to others, not their higher self. They were about the end product, profit, and satisfying two masters (your boss and their market/audience). They were not working as well for solopreneurs with a service versus product business. The traditional, yang, patriarchal way of working appeared to omit the invaluable elements of visioning and values, mindfulness, and the sacred, divine feminine energy. The tools felt masculine, hard-edged, and poorly named. Over the years, my YINpreneur (she) continued to guide me to reframe the patriarchal corporate tools, language, and way of working. We have been redesigning, enhancing, or recreating each to align with this more ancient, feminine, creative, non-linear, and artistic way of being and working. The YINpreneur™ Ba Gua Planning guide is born The inspiration for this article appeared to be the traditional Wheel of Life by Paul J. Meyer. Although valuable, this tool still felt like something was missing. I breathed and invited my YINpreneur in for a review. Checking in with somatic messages, I came to realize that neither the visual wheel, nor the language (of the categories chosen, and the instructions) brought positive energy to my practice. With time, the ideas flowed. My Buddhist practice reminded me of the power of the number eight, and the Tibetan Wheel of Life, which invited ancient wisdom, sacred energy, karma, and the reminder that just looking at it can be a blessing. I allowed this thought to be with me each time I approached the reframing and redesign of this coaching tool. Inviting in even more ancient wisdom I leaned into Feng Shui, the iChing and Taoist energy practice. Thus, the YINpreneur Ba Gua Planning Guide was birthed. The YINpreneur™ Visioning Ba Gua Preparation: Engaging in this practice is a mini-retreat. I invite you to create an environment and use the tools that bring you joy and positive energy as you play. This may include candles, music, a favorite pen, or device, and a warm or cool beverage.

to use your favorite pen or the colors noted within the Bagua area you are focused on. Practice: Engage with this tool yearly, monthly, weekly, or ondemand to reflect on your core values and how they are aligned with your desired life and goals. Reflect with art, joy, and neutral, non-judgment. This is not a test and reflects a moment in time. Play with it and create it in a way that, like the Tibetan Wheel of Life, makes you feel good to gaze at it. Knowing you have the clarity to create the life you desire with balance and joy. This tool can be enjoyed alone, with friends, during a retreat, and as prep to work with your coach or mentor. Do you recognize yourself as the YINpreneur? Wishing for a separate way of working now that you’ve left corporate? Curious to play with a YINpreneur Signature tool? If yes, visit https://kdmcmillan.com/baguaintro/ to download a free YINpreneur Ba Gua template with guidance on how to use it. For now, remember to breathe!

Design: The traditional tool is created as a B&W circle with 8-10 parts, like a pie which you fill in (rate) on a scale of 1-10 (Left). The YINpreneur Ba Gua is inspired by the spiritual power of 8, noting the eight categories of the Ba Gua blended with the power of Feng Shui colors and direction. I invite you 17

Not Just Responders … Creating a Heart Healthy Community VAL WOODS

y only sibling, Pettis Curtis Adams III, went into cardiac arrest in 2018. Unfortunately, bystanders did not know Heart attack symptoms are not always dramatic like how to perform Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR), but they appear in the movies. Symptoms can include: they immediately called emergency medical services (EMS). • pressure or pain in your chest EMS arrived within five minutes, but it was too late. As a • shortness of breath with usual activities result, I established Val Woods CPR committed to empower • sweating at rest individuals with life-saving skills, cultivate a culture of • feeling weak or lightheaded preparedness, and tackle the prevalent heart health concerns • experiencing pain in the neck, back, jaw, arms, stomach within communities. Beyond the scope of CPR training, Val or shoulders Woods CPR strives to foster a community that recognizes • nausea, vomiting, and feeling sick. the vital significance of heart health through comprehensive education and heightened awareness. The mission is to create not just responders, but a community that values and prioritizes heart health, paving the way for a safer and healthier For women these heart attack symptoms can also include nausea/vomiting, abdominal pain or cramping, indigestion or future. heartburn, and back or jaw pain. Most women do not even realize they are having a heart attack. Regardless of gender This article shares how to recognize the symptoms of a heart difference, if you experience any of these symptoms seek attack. medical help immediately! A heart attack occurs when oxygen-rich blood flow to the heart is blocked due to a clogged artery. If not reopened quickly, the Did you know that you can be a superhero against heart section of the heart not receiving this oxygen-rich blood will disease! Here’s your power plan: begin to die. • Set up a call with your healthcare provider to learn your heart risk. Every 40 seconds someone in the US has a heart attack. The symptoms of a heart attack can be different for men and • Stop smoking—just one year without smoking slashes your heart risk in half. women. So, if you ever feel something strange, don’t brush it • Get moving for at least 150 minutes a week, like brisk off. Dial 911 right away—it could be a difference between life walks or jogging. Pumping iron twice a week is a bonus! and death. Check with your healthcare provider! • Upgrade your family’s menu with smart swaps, tasty snacks, and healthier cooking. • Learn CPR - Sign up for a class with Val Woods CPR at DISCLAIMER: This article is not meant to be a medical https://www.valwoodscpr.com/ service. Never ignore professional medical advice in seeking treatment because of something you read in this article. If For more information on common heart attack warning signs: Heart Attack Warning Signs you have a medical emergency, call 911 immediately. Cardiac Arrest Vs. Heart Attack Heart Attack Info

Val Woods is Owner of Val Woods CPR, a nurse, and certified CPR instructor. She offers group training and individual high-quality training. To learn more about Val and her offers. Please visit, https://www.valwoodscpr.com/

A Cookie Tradition CYNTHIA SMITH

s I rifled through Mom’s curated treasure trove of recipes as an adult, I discovered a cookie concoction that gave credit to her mother, Elsie Hecht, lovingly nicknamed Nana.

I was curious as to how and why this particular recipe became part of our family legacy. Mom couldn’t recall its origins but had early recollections of helping her mother in the kitchen. Elsie Hecht was well known to her friends as having excellent culinary skills. Mom continued Nana’s annual ritual with us. Indeed, many early memories revolve around joining Mom in our tiny kitchen, gleefully creating, in our eyes, what were beautiful cookies. Each became a masterpiece, although not without many icing mishaps. Confectionary sugar powder haphazardly dusted every surface, rogue sprinkles were discovered long after the project was completed, and many weird color combinations abounded. Life changed; our ritual was put aside, and time spent in the kitchen together dwindled. It was my turn to channel my ‘inner Nana’ by taking on the task of continuing the family tradition. I discovered that the dough was very heavy compared to other recipes, and that magic happens in the overnight refrigeration step! Using Nana’s black-handled rolling pin, I carefully chose the cookie cutter size and shape to maximize the number of cookies per batch. Mom coached my first batch by saying, “One-minute more or less at 400 degrees matters to the texture: soft, crispy or burnt!” After some practice, I perfected the technique, achieving the proper ratio of time and temperature. I also learned that the consistency of the icing ingredients is paramount to the finished product! Made from scratch, this recipe truly has been a labor of love that, after Mom passed away, I wanted to share with others! Like Mom, I did the baking and then began inviting others to assist with decorating. While working at the table, many stories were shared, and new memories were created. Each helper receives a tin of the finished cookies to enjoy. Alas, a new tradition was born! Yes, there are still decorating debacles, but I always receive back an empty container with a smile and an ask to be on the list next time! 20

Elsie Hecht (Nana’s) Cut Out Cookie Recipe • • • • • • • • • • • •

½ c. soft butter 1 C sugar 2 eggs 2 Tbsp. cream or canned milk 1 tsp. choice of flavoring: vanilla, almond, anise or other 2 ½ C sifted flour ½ tsp. salt ¼ tsp baking soda *Chill overnight (4-5 hrs. minimum) in a sealed plastic gallon-sized baggie. Roll out to your desired thickness. Use your favorite cookie cutters. The number of cookies is dependent on size of cutters. Allow for rising. Dough rises minimally during baking. Bake at 400 degrees for 6-8 minutes to desired texture. Recommend parchment paper for easy removal and clean up.

Elsie Hecht (Nana’s) Cookie Icing*

• 1C confectioner’s sugar • ¼ tsp. salt • ½ tsp choice of flavoring to match the cookie dough • 3/4 Tbsp water or 1 Tbsp. canned milk **Icing consistency is thinner than traditional frosting. Tint with food coloring and sprinkles of choice to decorate on cooled cookies.

Uniquely iced and decorated cookie tin

Mom’s last cookie icing fun with daughters, Jan (middle) and me (R) Cynthia P. Smith, CHWC, Ed.D. is a credentialed adult educator and holistic wellness coach. She coaches forward-thinking clients who want to enjoy vitality and longevity through incorporating practical holistic wellness strategies now to avoid often debilitating health issues later. Cynthia specializes in weight loss and management, stress reduction and self-care for the caregiver. Please connect with Cynthia in her Facebook Group Well Within Wellness. 21

Affirmations SUSAN CARMEN-DUFFY

reams do come true.

I launched a new product in November—an affirmation deck of cards. To be transparent, I did this for me. I don’t always do that, but this project has been swimming in my head for no less than five years. I started it (but never finished it) at least four or five times. But it was persistent. Perking away on the back burner it seems. One day, after discussing the project while having lunch with two friends who are not only dear to me but fantastic cheerleaders, I sat down for about four days and worked on nothing but this very project.

There were moments of uncertainty, but when I slowed down to listen, to see, I found the path was paved before me. I worried that something I struggled with was now almost too easy. To be fair, the art was already scanned and edited. The affirmations had been swimming in my head for literally years, and joyfully it flowed together seamlessly. I found that I had to try to keep up! It felt like an ordained project, almost magical.

So the idea behind this deck is to start your day with a positive thought. The hope is that if you do so, THAT will be your repeating message and hopefully, it will help shape the rest of your positive thoughts each day. In my deck, there are fifty-two cards, each with a positive affirmation written on a piece of my art. I know the temptation is to start something “new” in January. We make promises of perfection to ourselves which seem all too often to be unreasonable. The idea behind a deck of 52 affirmations is that you can restart at any time. One a week, or five in a week, the choice is yours completely! However you find the light, I hope you do so with vigor. The world can be a difficult place, the last thing we need is negativity swimming around in our heads.

While it is easy to overthink any project, this project, at this time seemed to ignore all those challenges. That in and of itself I wish you peace, and I am sending you so much love, was such a blessing! (I am a great overthinker!) Susan The next step was to send it to my printer. I am incredibly blessed by the working relationship I have with my printer. They are local, do great work, and work with artists until it is perfect. We test-printed a few times and then my dream became a reality. I started carrying around the mock-up of the deck and became a seven-year-old wanting to show everyone I met. The response was incredible! Why am I sharing all this? I think that in general many of us have struggled with negative thoughts. It is easy to go there, isn’t it? Upon doing a little research, I learned that we think (on average) about 60,000 thoughts a day. Of those, about 80% are negative and 95% of our total thoughts are repetitive. WOW! That is a heck of a challenge, isn’t it? I know how easy it is to deep dive into the negative. I know personally how difficult it is to climb out of that spiral and find the positive, or at least the blessing. So, as much for anyone, this is for me. I made these with the hope that it would help. (you and me!) 22

As a mixed media artist, my style is often whimsical and full of color. I am inspired by the beauty of nature and pay special reverence to the feminine. Each medium in art has its strength, the wonder is revealed after the layers have been carefully applied on watercolor paper or canvas. As a professional artist for over forty years, my awardwinning work has been collected throughout the United States as well as Internationally. My writing has been published in several anthologies, and online zines. My business Create Art 4 Good, and greeting card business, Greetings 4 Good not only share art, and facilitate workshops, but also pay it forward including a donation from every sale to a local charity.

Empowering Women JOIE GHARRITY

y entrepreneurial journey began at a young age when I would spend summers with my grandmother in Arizona. My grandmother would share stories about her mother, who traveled from Mexico and became the first realtor in her small town. My great grandmother also renovated homes and became one of the top landlords in the area. My grandmother followed in her mother’s footsteps, owning a series of popular Mexican restaurants, and opening a tortilla factory that mass-produced tortillas for local restaurants and grocery stores. She even hosted a cooking show for the local TV channel. These strong, entrepreneurial women inspired me to become my own boss and create a successful career for myself. After leaving a 15+ year career in Hollywood, I decided to open up my own branding and media company that serves entrepreneurs and creatives of all types. I pulled from my work in the Hollywood entertainment industry at top companies, in film, television, original web content, and branded entertainment and decided to secure a presence in the livestreaming arena because it is a powerful tool. It offers a larger sphere of influence. I launched the media division of my company Joie G 113 Superstar Women Entrepreneurs Media Network in 2023. The network is dedicated to empowering women entrepreneurs by providing them with next-level solutions in business, health, marketing, wellness, publishing, wealth, and influence. My why for launching the SWE Media Network is to honor the women that inspired me as a young girl. I believe that every woman entrepreneur has the birthright to empower herself by sharing her gifts and talents with the world and grow a thriving business. As an entrepreneur myself, I designed the SWE Media Network to help women entrepreneurs locate the necessary tools, tips, products, and services to build a thriving business quickly. The network is a series of livestream video and podcast shows hosted by content creators that deliver next-level solutions in just 15-minutes -- keeping in mind how busy today’s women boss ladies are.

If you are woman entrepreneur looking to unlock next-level solutions in business, health, marketing, wellness, publishing, wealth, and influence, subscribe to the SWE Media Network YouTube Channel today! If you are interested in having a show and delivering next-level solutions, please get in touch with Joie on her website www. joieg113.com. Joie Gharrity, Founder of Joie G 113, is a Brand Consultant, Author, Livestream Content Creator, Podcaster, and International Speaker. She empowers entrepreneur women to be their own superstar by shining a spotlight on their company brand in the marketplace with branding, marketing, and the Superstar Women Entrepreneurs Media Network. www.joieg113.com

Courageous is Spelled MARIAM RUTH MEDLIN

“I have cancer.” That’s how Mariam started a long voicemail message to me, with those three words. Her voice was calm and unwavering. She downplayed the devastation that she must have been feeling, instead she focused on what this news would do to me, her best friend. “I know you’re going to be upset,” she said. “Please don’t worry because I am not going to.” She said that until she had met with an oncologist there wasn’t much more to say or do and that she’d be back in touch in a couple of days. I sat on the side of my bed and cried. My face was wet with salty tears that would not stop flowing down my cheeks. “Oh no, oh no, oh no,” I kept repeating to myself. What would I do without my best friend? Life-changing events bring out the worst in some, the best in others. Mariam chose to take this unwelcome news and turn it into a lesson in courage. Several days went by before I worked up the courage to visit her. As I drove up to the house, my courage was failing me at this moment. How was I going to act and re-act? I did not know the answer to that. I just knew that I had a lot of questions, but how much did Mariam want to tell me? We sat in her living room facing each other on twin red leather sofas. I was silent, afraid that if I spoke, I would start to cry. Mariam explained where the cancer was and what she planned to do about treatment. Cancer. The words chemo, radiation, and surgery drifted unspoken through the air like sharks circling their prey. Finally, I burst out crying and asked, “aren’t you afraid?” Mariam calmly got up from her sofa and came to sit beside me, a box of tissues in her hand. She said nothing, waiting 24

until my crying subsided, then she said, “No, I’m not afraid. I have one of the best oncologists in the state. These days cancer is treatable and beatable. I know that I have a great shot at having a winning outcome. For now, it’s about forming a team of advocates, medical professionals, friends, and family to get a jump start on this. I need you on my team.” A team was formed. Mariam was the epitome of courageousness, leading the team much of the time. She sent individual cards and letters to us. Her focus was not on herself, but on how she could help others. She directed, orchestrated, and cheered us on. To keep us task-oriented, she handed out assignments. “Can you pick me up after my infusion treatment next Friday?” or “Would you take John (her husband) out to lunch? He’s really isolating these days and could use a good meal and some witty repartee.” She knew that assignments gave us purpose and kept us in her orbit. She rarely spoke of her treatment protocol or her prognosis. She seldom missed work and she was up for travel weekends to the coast. Because of her courageous outlook, most of the time I honestly forgot that she was sick. She did not look or act sick. But as her treatments became more aggressive, she started to lose her hair, so she got a wig and had her hairdresser shape and style it. The wig was a courageous move because her signature hair style was a very short pixie cut and that was difficult to re-create in a wig. Occasionally, if someone commented on her hair, she would take her hand and smooth down the back of her hair and say, “Do you like it? I just thought it was time for a change!” And that was that. I believe most people did not know about Mariam’s courageous battle with cancer. Her team was a close-knit troop, and we would close ranks to protect her when we could. We were in awe of her stoicism, and we marveled at her stamina. She took on the relocation of her company starting with a capital campaign to raise funds for the move, to the purchase of the land, and to the building of new offices. She was a force to be reckoned with. She kept getting stronger and stronger in her drive to get her staff relocated. Talk about courage and fortitude. She made bold financial inroads with movers and shakers, sometimes inviting or cajoling them into joining in her effort to raise enough funding for what we would come to call Mariam’s building. In May, she completed her mission and moved her staff over a weekend into their new digs, opening for business as usual on Monday morning. Everything was going right along until it wasn’t. Mariam’s cancer had spread and metastasized onto her liver and bones. She called a team meeting to make us aware of this latest development. She said something like, “…while this is an unexpected twist in my cancer journey, it is something that I

can deal with. So, have courage my friends. We will continue to march forward. I feel fine and I fully expect to continue with my life and my career.” She was our leader, the general shoring up her loyal troops, and instilling in us the courage we all would need in the months ahead. Much of the time, I did not feel like being courageous. I did not want to keep a stiff upper lip, I wanted to cry. I would bite my lip so that it wouldn’t quiver when I spoke to Mariam. I prayed that my eyes would not betray me so that my tears would not be shed in front of her. It was tough not being as strong as Mariam. In my calmer moments, I would marvel at my friend’s demeanor. How does she do it? I would ask myself. She did not waver. On January 19th, I received a phone call from one of Mariam’s employees, telling me that Mariam had passed away late the night before. She had worked that day and then because she was having an adverse reaction to one of the treatments, she had received a few days earlier, she decided it was best if she went to the hospital where her courageous battle ended. There is something about courageousness. It gives strength to those who believe. Mariam believed that she would beat cancer. Her courage was like an anchor; the thing she could draw upon repeatedly until she could not.

Ruth Medlin is a writer who lives in Cincinnati, Ohio. She worked in the fields of education and public service. Ruth enjoys cooking, reading, and traveling. Her first book, Me and Mar, will be published in 2024. Please connect with Ruth in her Facebook group Clementines. 25

Loneliness? An Unlikely Lifeline OLIVIA “LIV” ASH, ESQ., MS

2017

Chit chat is all I could hear as my footing faltered and lightheadedness blossomed. I saw the group ahead of me, yet Professor D. reviewed the exam content for the upcoming focused all energy towards my hand on the banister. Only a few more steps to the ground floor. final, and it read like a CVS receipt. Dammit. I’m not ready, not even close. I don’t understand it,and have nothing left. What am I going to do? The ring of black closed in; my body heated like water in a kettle, and sounds began to fade to the background. A classmate looked me in the face, smiled, and said something. I was desperate for space. I nodded a pleasantry in return, gathered my items, and exited the side door - a shorter distance to the bathroom - while most students exited via the back doors. Finding a niche, I doubled over, struggling for breath, as I willed the black to “back off.” I hid myself from view as best I could (a skill learned in law school) for privacy and to regain composure. It’s one of those tactics everyone learns the hard way, but nobody tells you during the orientation tour. I waited until the flock of classmates had dissipated. My plan was, like a burglar, to cover a lot of ground in a short time through swift, purposeful movements. Like threading a needle, I’d whip around the central staircase, stride diagonally across the atrium to the student entrance, then beeline for the safety of the parking lot while breathing in the fresh, cold, night air. Composed, yet restraining what was sure to be a torrent of tears, I rounded the corner and ran into a group of stragglers. They smiled and chatted; though I attempted both, alarms blared internally as I monitored my vitals. I hesitated, slowing my pace to match theirs, yet remained at the back of the group. “Liv, are you okay?” The books I held slid forward as I crumpled towards the ground like burned paper turning to ash. And just before I I wish I was alone. fell flat, a classmate caught me. The group of ladies, like hens, They moseyed, they laughed, and I tried to keep it together. began pouring words over me to encourage rest. I nestled into Every fiber of my being shook with glass-like fragility as we the railing and noted how cold the stone step felt against my descended the stairs. I feared another minute in the building panicked body. and I’d shatter into a million tiny pieces. I don’t remember the details following my body’s protest to protracted stress, yet eventually, I drove home that night. The One more flight. 26

classmate who, quite literally, offered a helping hand in my time of need will not be forgotten. Even now I see the concern in her dark eyes. I picture the glass staircase of the law school and wonder how the scene played out to an onlooker. And I recall the dread in my chest realizing I may fail the first academic course of my life - at the age of 37.

And I knew it to be true because I could sense the strain seeping from every pore of my colleagues as evidenced by weight gain, circles darkening their bloodshot eyes, and recurring ailments from weakened immune systems and sleep deprivation. Hmmm…

There’s got to be a better way to learn the law; this is I have to write a thesis this year, and I do not want to examine unsustainable. case law. What about law and health? I’m a health teacher with years of education and experience I could rely upon. Wellness interests me more than writing about case law. I could combine 2018 my background in exercise science with law, and dive into reasons underlying lawyers rating the loneliest of American workers. And “What? Really? Why?” I could make it worth the effort by conducting research through The statistic staring at me from the magazine article was the university. And maybe it will help. A win-win. enough to turn the gears of cerebral machinations. Let’s do it. Why did lawyers rank the loneliest of American workers? That’s not a good sign; I’m in law school and graduate next spring. I knew it to be true, however, but not how I know it to be true now. I knew it to be true because I, a fourth year part-time evening law student, felt the isolation inherent in striving towards a degree designed to first dismantle and then rewire your thinking. I knew it to be true because I lived an endless state of exhaustion working full time during the day, attending night classes, then driving home in the dark to a safe, yet solitary space. I knew it to be true, because who else but those who sat next to me night-after-night knew what it felt like dreading an exam with a dismal pass rate?

Olivia (Liv) Ash is an Indiana-licensed attorney and teacher, and founder of Liv Balanced, LLC. She’s a published author and award-winning researcher on loneliness. Liv speaks about integrating well-being practices to manage mental health. She’s been invited to present at Stanford Law School, and conducted seminars for: the American Bar Association; the International Society for Research on Emotion; Indiana University; The Institute for Well-Being in Law; and the Wellness Council of Indiana. Liv is a full time benefits compliance attorney and teaches undergraduate courses in well-being education as Adjunct Faculty at Indiana University - Indianapolis. Liv’s personal journey in managing chronic pain and mitigating loneliness has brought humility and appreciation for what it means to live human. Please connect with Liv on her website: http://www.livbalanced.net/ 27

Entrepreneurs Addressing Challenges Faced by Communities and Families DAVID DEY

ommunities face various challenges, but entrepreneurs are • providing solutions to pressing business and social issues. •

The Institute for Social Entrepreneurship has partnered with some exceptional entrepreneurs, businesses and organizations that are making sustainable impacts in the communities they do business in. Beyond the goal of making a profit, the Institute for Social Entrepreneurship is promoting an expanded application of entrepreneurship that makes a profit and a sustainable impact.

Changing demographics and the challenges they present External factors: Global events, economic recessions, pandemics like COVID 19 and its long-term implications.

All the above can adversely impact communities and ultimately families, leading to job losses, economic downturns, and social disruptions beyond their control. The Economic Innovation Group (EIG) created a Distressed Communities Index (DCI) tool for measuring the comparative economic well-being of U.S. communities. The index focuses on a series of social and economic indicators.

At the core of any business idea or venture is a person with a passion to solve a business problem and often the leaders have a passion to address a social issue that adversely impacts their Key Fact: 14.8% of the US population (nearly 48 million business or community. We would categorize these business Americans) reside in economically distressed communities and 60.6 million reside in at-risk communities. leaders as Social Entrepreneurs. Social Entrepreneurs follow their passion and purpose. A passion is simply something that you are enthusiastic about. Our purpose connects our passion and lives into a central idea or way that makes a difference. The Social Entrepreneur’s success lies in their ability to pursue their passion (business idea) and purpose (social difference) simultaneously. Wouldn’t Photo Info found: https://eig.org/distressed-communities/ it be ideal to be able to solve both as part of a business idea or key-findings/ venture? It appears that more prosperous communities experience A few years ago, I began examining my life and work. The growth in small businesses, employment, education, and process revealed the need to focus my efforts on activities that housing stability while distressed and at-risk communities truly pursue my passion and purpose by expanding the Institute experience less in almost every measure. to create a comprehensive model that better supported Social Entrepreneurs. Perhaps you are exploring how best to live out The impact of small businesses already has a profound impact on the wellness of communities. Our desire is to multiply the both as well. impact by supporting Social Entrepreneurs by showcasing how local knowledge and entrepreneurial skills can help Current Environment and Challenges communities, organizations, and individuals uncover and seize • Economic disparities new opportunities. • Social issues

• • • • 28

Inadequate infrastructure Political challenges Environmental factors Lack of access to education and healthcare

What are the right opportunities for you as a Social Entrepreneur?

Where do you start and how do you maintain a successful business and take on more? How do you choose the right problem or specific need to address? In some way, your life has been a series of lessons learned and experiences that have ultimately prepared you to respond to the need or problem you are most passionate about. The problem: • • • •

Is often visibly in front of you Will demand your best and challenge your level of commitment Requires your skills and talents Often requires partners or linkages with others

We all have a degree of passion and when channeled, our passion can be utilized to help solve a problem or need as a Social Entrepreneur. Choosing the right problem to solve is something we help you do. Here are samples of a few Social Entrepreneurs we helped link their passion (business idea) and purpose (social difference). Mike has a passion for his nearly acquired aquatic business that provided specialty products to customers.

Mike wanted to make a difference in the lives of children and families, so he added a specialty product to his business dedicated to helping children overcome the effects of cancer while receiving life sustaining treatment.

Brent has a passion and expertise for computer systems and wants to grow his software business.

Brent targets his growth to include hospital billing systems that speed up process and accuracy that lessen stress and increase the insurance approval process for families.

Nina has a passion for housing and customer service as a realtor.

Nina targets a portion of her business to connect with unbanked clients with a rent to own concept to help new homeowners fund stable owneroccupied housing access.

Choosing to Follow Both The ability to pursue your passion and purpose requires several keys. Courage – It takes great courage for a person to pursue their passion and purpose in the face of potential obstacles, especially self-doubt and the expectations of others. Opportunity – The quest to follow your passion and purpose forces one to make uncomfortable choices that may seem risky or unsettling. I have a friend that rejected a $100,000 job offer to pursue her passion for social media and marketing by launching a small business. She is experiencing success in her tenth year in business. Time – A commitment to spending the necessary time to ensure the success of the business or venture. The Institute is here to help at each stage of your process.

David is passionate about Social Entrepreneurship and improving communities. As a professor, consultant, and author with 25 years of experience as a community developer, he has built ISE’s curriculum, materials and proven methodology to help businesses succeed in growing and giving back. With expertise in securing resources to launch, grow and manage businesses and ventures, David helps entrepreneurs and communities develop and execute winning concepts through interactive programs and workshops. Please visit https://www.institute4se.com/ to learn more about David and the Institute. 29

The Million Dollar Soup JANET-LYNN MORRISON

Author, speaker, mindset expert, and professional risk-taker, Janet-Lynn Morrison is a writer who might take you to the edge of a heart-stopping cliff or to the point of falling into the deepest love. Or, maybe a bit of both. Janet-Lynn carries one fundamental belief with her everywhere she goes. It’s the reason she’s been able to experience the highest and lowest points of life, how she’s come to understand the power of love, and why you’re holding this book right now. She believes in living impossibly. When you live life without limits, the impossible starts to occur. And it all starts in the mind. Please visit http://janet-lynn.com/ 30

n the whirlwind of our daily lives, it’s easy to lose sight of our true selves, forgetting the unique blend of ingredients that define our essence. In my groundbreaking new book, The Million Dollar Soup, I extend a personal invitation to you, urging you to embark on a transformative journey where culinary metaphor meets personal development, crafting a recipe for a life that feels like a million dollars. The concept of a $1,000,000 soup, with exotic ingredients dancing on your palate, serves as a powerful metaphor for a life rich in substance and fulfillment. The revelation is this: the secret to this culinary masterpiece isn’t found in a gourmet kitchen or a high-end grocery store – it lies within us.

As you navigate through the pages, you’ll encounter a series of culinarythemed chapters, each acting as a metaphorical ingredient in the grand recipe of personal development. It’s not just about making a million dollars; it’s about feeling like a million dollars, about crafting a life resonating with purpose and meaning. The journey kicks off with a call to embrace the transformative power within our minds. I encourage you to stir, simmer, and season your personal journey to perfection, using every lesson as a necessary ingredient in the grand scheme of life. From navigating adversities with a ‘grain of salt’ to understanding the potency of positive thinking and confident living, each chapter adds a unique flavor and depth to the understanding of a meaningful life. Now, let me share my story – a poignant example of the book’s teachings. At 40, my inner voice whispered that I wasn’t living the life I truly desired. Despite being a dedicated mother, I felt like a one-dimensional character, a bland pot of soup with run-of-the-mill ingredients, lacking the zest I craved. Realizing I was living like a can of soup - stifled and lacking passion - I took charge of my narrative, revisited my purpose, rekindled dormant passions, and embarked on a journey of self-discovery. The missing ingredients were within me; I just needed to stir the pot and add a dash of passion. My personal transformation, from a can of soup to a flavorful blend of talents and passions, involved reconnecting with my love for nature, writing, and music. It demanded introspection, a re-examination of goals, and a commitment to personal growth. The turning point came when I made a list of my true desires and took steps to achieve them. Completing my ARCT in Classical Piano from the Royal Conservatory of Music, embracing physical activity, completing six triathlons, earning a black belt in kickboxing – these were just a few steps on my path. Along the way, I discovered new passions like writing and public speaking, even opening two kickboxing fitness gyms. Now, on a mission to inspire others to ‘live impossibly’ (my motto in life), I’ve found a life that feels like a million dollars. My story is a testament to the transformative power within each of us, a passion fueled by the loss of loved ones, teaching me the importance of living in the present moment. Some may think that their journey has gone beyond the point where they can turn things around...they’ve hit rock bottom. I understand rock bottom too. Rock bottom is different for all of us, you see. Sometimes hitting rock bottom is not always something that you can even feel; as sometimes you

feel nothing. I experienced a traumatic childhood that eventually led to very dark times. I started out as a good child from a good family, at least until I was relocated and forced to live in an abusive environment. Before long, I was forced to couch surf, and when I ran out of couches, I stayed wherever I could, until my last resort was to hit the streets. I reached my lowest ebb one night while the cold and continuous rain was pelting through the slats of the bench under which I was curled up. Instead of feeling any emotion at all, I felt none. There wasn’t anything left in me to feel. I was numb. But it was that numbness that changed my life that night. I had come to a crossroads, and my choices were to give up or get up. I decided to get up, and although it wasn’t easy, I made my way through it, and in time, I became an educated and successful individual. I often think about all the other ways it could have gone. In my case, numbness gave way to an urgent need for survival and made me realize what I had to do. I needed to create a steadfast and effective course of action with priorities that would lead me out of the dark and into the light. I decided to discover what life had to offer and, at that point, I became determined to rise up from rock bottom into the sunshine. It all comes down to having hope, a four letter word that can literally move mountains! Two things are certain: you will never forget being there and you will also remember how you got up again. Forgiveness, especially of myself, became the key to my perpetual smile and positive outlook. Life, for me, is about creating my dreams and helping others do the same while embracing a healthy lifestyle. The Million Dollar Soup isn’t just a book; it’s a guide for those seeking a more meaningful and fulfilling life. I encourage you to rediscover your passions, embrace challenges, and actively participate in the conscious creation of your life story.

As you turn the pages of “The Million Dollar Soup,” consider the ingredients already within your grasp. Stir them with purpose, season with determination, and simmer in the transformative power of your own mind. Get ready to craft a life beyond your uninhibited imagination – a life that truly feels like a million dollars.

Unconditional love AGOTHA “AGI” STERNBERG

s I reflect on the Christmas season, I think of all the children that were dreaming and hoping for that perfect gift. I remember my boys’ faces years ago as they lit up when they received the “perfect” gift. Now I get to witness the same look on the faces of my grandchildren and great grandchildren as they experience the magic of Christmas and see their wishes come true.

don’t have a picture of my injured doll, as cameras in Hungary during that time were a luxury, and we didn’t have one. But we did have a camera in Switzerland and here is the picture of me and my two new dolls with heads! I was in doll heaven that Christmas. My Christmas dream finally came true!

I recall my childhood in Budapest, Hungary, where poverty was the norm. I did not know we were poverty-stricken because my parents provided what they could to make our “dreams” come true. There was only one time that I can remember when I didn’t get what I was hoping for. I had a doll when I was little, which had a soft cloth body. The head was made of beautiful and fragile porcelain. I played endlessly with that doll and one of my favorite pastimes was to swing with her. We had a swing in the doorway (indoor entertainment) in the living quarters and I was swinging one day with my favorite doll in hand. Unfortunately, the swing swayed to one side and the doll’s head hit the doorway and smashed its head into little pieces. I cried and tried to console the doll, and myself, hoping that soon she would have a new head. I was told by my parents that the doll hospital was working hard on making the heads, but it would take a long time as many dolls’ heads were broken. As I waited for the new head, I played with my doll as she was, headless. I dressed her, took her on walks, and loved her like before the accident. It didn’t matter that she had no head, I talked to her and loved her as she was. Unfortunately, her fixed head never did come back from the doll hospital, but I played with her and loved her anyway.

My parents brought my sister, brother, and me to America in March of 1959. At 77 years old, I have two sons, four grandsons, three granddaughters, and two great granddaughters. I was a stay-at-home mom until my sons went to middle school, and then joined the workforce as a bookkeeper. Now I run my own business that I took over from my brother after working for him (with him) for 27 years. Before that I had a travel agency for several years until the electronic age more-or-less killed the industry.

A few years later, in 1956, my family escaped Hungary and were taken in by a Swiss family in Kirchberg, Switzerland. The first Christmas (1957) in Switzerland I was given two dolls. I

After my husband passed, I moved in with my older son Robert (Rob) Susel, who lives in Streetsboro and has a mother in law suite that is now my home.

Agi with her two dolls with heads in Switzerland in 1957. Her Christmas Dream came true!

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