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MERCURY CLUBLAND AWARDS 2015 - LAST CHANCE TO VOTE! We’re now approaching the last chance to vote in this year’s Mercury Awards! Voting will close on Monday 1st September at 5.00 pm for both postal and email voting - any votes received in the post after that date will only count if postmarked prior to the closing date. This year the voting has been higher than ever, with a record number of email votes being received, and we have been amazed at the wide range of artists recognised by our readers in their voting, which just goes to show how much talent really is out there, offering incredible entertainment in the clubs and pubs across the area. Interestingly the last twelve months seems to have produced a resurgence in the number of all-live bands out on the road, with rock being especially popular. Many pubs are taking advantage of the new PRS rules, it seems, to offer live entertainment on a regular basis, which in turn provides more opportunities for young artists to break on to the circuit and learn their trade the proper way, rather than relying on the instant fame of The Voice and X Factor, and similar offerings on the TV. This year’s Presentation Night will be part of Weston Park Cancer Charity’s 20th Anniversary Celebration, and so “For One Night Only” you will have the opportunity to see a cameo showcase of some of Clubland’s favourite acts from this year - and in addition, we shall be announcing next week details of some exciting guest artists who have agreed to come along and perform and give their support to the
fundraising campaign! Watch out for next week’s issue, as we shall also be announcing ticket details – as always, the night is certain to be a sell-out so book early if you don’t want to miss this great night out! Voting is very close in some of categories, so if you haven’t been in touch already, please get your votes in as soon as possible! The list of winners is almost certain to produce a number of new faces who haven’t featured in the Awards before, so it bodes well for the future of live acts across the region.
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Weekly Wit With...
ALBERT SNODGRASS One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a while she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately rush up to catch her and straighten her up. Again she seems OK, but after a while she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back and once more bring her back upright. This goes on all morning. Later the family arrives to see how the old woman is adjusting to her new home. “So Ma, how is it here? Are they treating you all right?” they ask. “It’s pretty nice,” she replies. “Except they won’t let you fart.” ‘Officer, two women are fighting over me.’ ‘What’s wrong with that?’ ‘The big, fat, ugly one is winning’ An unmarried mother has given birth to piglets. The Child Support Agency is now looking for the swine responsible A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. “I couldn’t help noticing how happy you look,” she said. “What’s your secret for a long happy life?” “I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day,” he said. “I also drink a case of whisky a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise.” “That’s amazing,” the woman said. “How old are you?” “Twentysix,” he said. Three old ladies are sitting their retirement home reminiscing about old times. The first old lady recalls shopping at the greengrocers and demonstrates with her hands the length and girth of a cucumber she could by for a penny. The second old lady nods in agreement adding “onions were also much bigger” cupping her two hands together and putting two fingers up and saying. “I used to get two for a penny” “I can’t hear a word you are saying” says the third old lady “But I can certainly remember the bloke you are talking about”
THIS WEEK In the News 30/8/1835 31/8/1997 1/9/1914 2/9/1807 3/9/1878 4/9/1998 5/9/1986
Melbourne, Australia is founded. Diana, Princess of Wales, her companion Dodi Al-Fayed and driver Henri Paul die in a car crash in Paris. The last passenger pigeon, a female named Martha, dies in captivity in the Cincinnati Zoo. The Royal Navy bombards Copenhagen with fire bombs & phosphorus rockets to prevent Denmark from surrendering its fleet to Napoleon. Over 640 die when the crowded pleasure boat Princess Alice collides with the Bywell Castle in the River Thames. Google is founded by Larry Page and Sergey Brin, two students at Stanford University. Pan Am Flight 73 with 358 people on board is hijacked at Karachi International Airport.
Born this week... 30/8/1972 31/8/1949 1/9/1946 2/9/1965 3/9/1981 4/9/1981 5/9/1946
Cameron Diaz Richard Gere Barry Gibb Lennox Lewis Fearne Cotton Beyoncé Knowles Freddie Mercury
PUB QUIZ 1. On which racecourse is the St Leger run? 2. Which arm did Nelson lose in service? 3. On a dartboard, which number is directly opposite 1? 4. Which is the first animal in the dictionary? 5. Who was the host of Animal Magic? 6. The title of which Shakespeare play is also a proverb? 7. What nationality is the violinist, Yehudi Menuhin? 8. How many children were in Enid Blyton’s Famous Five? 9. Which Olympic athlete has won gold medals at 5 successive Olympics? 10. On which day of the week are British elections held?
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