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RT Catering

Pale Eddie’s

for any Simcha, corporate event or other celebration 205.202.4151

2308 2nd Ave N Birmingham 205.542.5562 paleeddiespourhouse.com

come see us soon!

your friends at Rogue Tavern, RT Catering, The Filling Station & Pale Eddie’s!

The Filling Station

Pizza café and bar

rear pew mirror • doug brook

High Holy Days – in 700 words The High Holy Days are about two things: Long services, and longer lists — about tense subjects… past and future. We recount the things we’ve done wrong, and wish well upon ourselves. Ironically, we don’t say anything about the things we have done or will do right. As your mind wanders during services, ponder that as well as the following…

Sun-W: 11a-9p Th-Sat: 11am-10p 5524 Crestwood Blvd Birmingham 205.592.3455 facebook.com/ThefillingstationBHAM

Rogue Tavern

great food, spirits & live entertainment M-Th: 11a-11p F-Sa: 11am-1a 2312 2nd Ave N Birmingham 205.202.4151 roguetavern.com

We have sinned against you by letting our minds wander during services. We have sinned against you by texting while driving. We have sinned against you by splashing while diving. We have sinned against you by not rinsing the pans. We have sinned against you by being Y*nkees fans. We have sinned against you by deciding some are stupid because of their politics. We have sinned against you by assuming some are smart because of their politics. We have sinned against you by lacking remorse. We have sinned against you by forgetting the code of Morse. We have sinned against you by ignoring all the signs. We have sinned against you by using near rhymes. We have sinned against you by not reading what’s on our shelves. We have sinned against you by sinning against ourselves. We have sinned against you by not knowing how to dial rotary phones. We have sinned against you, now with flying drones. We have sinned against you by loudly not taking Hall’s. We have sinned against you by not ignoring robocalls. We have sinned against you by not bringing a World Series championship to Chicago’s North Side, again. We have sinned against you through excessive screen time and scream time. We have sinned against you by texting or talking during the play, film, or service. We have sinned against you by being patronizing (which means talking down to). We have sinned against you by not understanding. We have sinned against you by not staying standing. We have sinned against you by not stealing second. We have sinned against you by going for seconds. We have sinned against you by settling for second. We have sinned against you by wasting thousands of seconds. And, now, lest we forget the future…

“Birmingham’s finest scratch bakery since 1939” Cookies, pies, breads, pastries, cakes, and more — baked fresh on site daily Open Mon-Fri 8 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. Saturday 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

2916 18th St S Birmingham

205-871-4901 savagesbakery.com

May your mind wander during services, to new places of enlightenment. May your home be without leaks, and your confidences not leaked. May your only race controversy be a photo finish in the 200-meter dash. May your stock rise, your stock portfolio go up, and your stockings stay up. May you find your tall ship, and a star to steer her by. May you not be accused of ascribing gender roles based on your use of pronouns for inanimate objects. May you get tickets to Hamilton. After spending all that money to see it, may you get Hamilton. continued on previous page

62 Southern Jewish Life • October 2016

Profile for Southern Jewish Life

SJL Deep South, October 2016  

October 2016 Deep South edition of Southern Jewish Life, the Jewish community news magazine for Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana and NW Flori...

SJL Deep South, October 2016  

October 2016 Deep South edition of Southern Jewish Life, the Jewish community news magazine for Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana and NW Flori...

Profile for sjlmag
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