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Federico’s FAMILY FLORIST
815 Focis Street Metairie, LA 70005 504.837.6400 flowers@federicosflorist.com Mon-Fri:7am-1pm Sat:7am-Noon Larry Federico, Owner/President
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Kenny Thone, Co-Owner/Vice President
January 2023 • Southern Jewish Life
Ask the Rabbit, Alexa Originally intended as an Ask the Rabbi feature, a contractual typo obligated this column to instead periodically provide the very best in traditional Rabbitic wisdom: Ask the Rabbit. Lettuce begin. A fun feature of smart speakers, like the Apple HomePod, Amazon Echo, or Google Nest, is that people can ask them questions and actually get answers. What’s more fun is that people can submit their own answers to questions that have been asked but for which the smart speakers weren’t quite smart enough without help. Amazon’s Alexa contains numerous unanswered Judaic questions, and some questions with answers that just aren’t very entertaining. Suggesting answers led to the discovery that submitted answers are, in fact, moderated. So, despite being a foremost rabbitic authority, most of my Judaic answers are either eternally pending or outright flagged, while just a few were cleared for civilized people to hear. Yes, these are my actual submitted answers to actual questions. Is kosher salt kosher? Kosher salt is kosher unless it’s served or used on food that is not kosher. Is kosher salt blessed by a rabbi? Kosher salt is blessed by a rabbi only if it sneezes. Is kosher food blessed? Kosher food is blessed if someone says a blessing over it. There’s no blessing that can itself make food kosher. That’s up to the cook. What do Jewish men wear on their head? Many Jewish men wear a kippah, or yarmulke. Some wear a shtreimel. Some wear a toupée. And some wear a New York Mets baseball cap. Do Jewish people eat shrimp? Some Jewish people eat shrimp. Are they supposed to? That’s a different Giving answers question. Tell me a Jewish fact? A Jewish fact is a fact with at least one Jewish parent, or Alexa can only that converted to Judaism. What is the wife of a rabbi called? dream about The wife of a rabbi is sometimes called a rebbitzen. The husband of a woman rabbi is called lucky. What’s a Jewish church? A Jewish church is a contradiction in terms. But Jews worship in synagogues or temples. Are bagels Jewish? Whether bagels are Jewish or not depends on who their parents are. Or if they converted. What is the holiest day of the year in Judaism? Shabbat, the Sabbath, is the holiest day of the year in Judaism — and it happens every week! Of the once-a-year holidays, based on the number of people called up to the Torah at services that day, Yom Kippur is the holiest day. Have we ever had a Jewish president? That depends on who is meant by “we.” As of 2022, the United States of America has never had a Jewish president. Similarly, the state of Israel has never had a non-Jewish president. Ukraine’s president Zelensky is also Jewish. So, it depends on who are “we.” What is another name for synagogue? Another name for synagogue is temple. You can try to call it a Jewish church, a Jewish mosque, or Veronica, but it won’t answer. What are synagogue storage cabinets? Synagogue storage cabinets are usually closets. But the large one in the sanctuary or chapel, which holds continued on previous page