DATING & RELATIONSHIPS
Should You Break Up With A Friend?
I
was dumped by my high school best friend during my first year of university. Turns out, our friendship didn’t magically weather the changes that came with moving to the next stage of life. If it was going to survive, both of us needed to work for it. On my part, I did try—however clumsily. But, she told me pointblank, it just wasn’t working for her and she wasn’t willing to do the same. Reader, it hurt more than any of my romantic breakups. Monica Karpinski is a writer and editor focused on women’s health, sex, and relationships. She is the founder of women’s health media platform The Femedic 58 • MARCH 2023
There’s a cruel and specific pain that comes with friend split-ups. It’s a rejection that’s somehow more personal and slices deeper, like a paper cut exactly where your fingers bend. That’s because with friends, the stakes are purely personal. Friendships don’t have the same formal structure nor call for the same commitment as with a partner or family; you enter into friendships voluntarily, simply because you like each other. Maybe this is why we believe (or hope) that our friends will always stick around. If the relationship carries fewer expectations, surely there’s less risk it will break down? But for many, especially as fewer folks are following the traditional path of marriage and children, friendships are critical relationships in our lives. This means that the same issues that drive couples apart—communication issues, betrayals of trust—can also crop up between pals.