By Dr Karen Phillip
W
hen our baby enters the toddler world, things radically change. Parents believe that their now two to three-yearold child is capable of informed decisions. They are not.
Two to three-year-old children are now acting more independently and talking to us reasonably well, using the toilet and eating independently; however, their brain is about 6 – 8% matured. We often hear stories that parents are struggling with their child at home while the preschool and grandparents tell us how wonderful they are. They are well behaved most of the time, tolerant, occasionally impulsive of course, but still pleasant to have around. Parents seem surprised at times and may wonder why their child is a little more reactive and defiant at home. 22
Peninsula Kids – Autumn 2020
Understand the reason
There is a reason for everything, including the reason a young child acts the way they do at home. Overwhelm is often the reason. Overwhelm occurs when parents negotiate with their developing toddler. Negotiation is undoubtedly excellent, but negotiation of multiple choices can quickly overwhelm a little child. Negotiation with two choices only (perhaps three) is needed for their mind to process.
As an example, the child wants something to eat. The parent, being kind and considerate, opens the cupboard or refrigerator and asks what the child would like. This is often overwhelming for the child. Of course, sometimes continued next page...