YOU are your child’s best advocate. Tuesday, Oct. 27, 2020
Speakers: Activist and author Debbie Reber Activist and author Jonathan Mooney Author Laura Kastner, Ph.D. A panelist discussion featuring David Lewis, Psy.D., Mark Stein, Ph.D., and Howard Eaton
Resource Directory Aspiring Youth Aspiring Youth offers social skills groups, summer programs and other services to neurodiverse youth. Seattle, Bellevue, Redmond and virtual | aspiringyouth.net
Boyer Children’s Clinic Boyer provides life-changing services — therapies, education, family and medical support — to children with diverse abilities, and partners with families to ensure they have the support, tools and confidence to help their children thrive, both now and in the future. Seattle | boyercc.org
Collabor8 Employer Collective Collabor8 Employer Collective is a cohort of employer organizations focused on creating equity and inclusion in their organizations via learning and sharing through valuable collaborative partnerships, conversations, and up-to-date data. Greater Seattle | tadapartners.com/collabor8
Community of Mindful Parenting Community of Mindful Parenting empowers and connects parents in pursuit of mindful living through our two classes: Listening Mothers and Finding Calm. Seattle | communityofmindfulparenting.com
Dartmoor School Dartmoor School is a fully accredited private school providing 1:1 customized instruction for students in grades 1–12. Bellevue | dartmoorschool.org
Resource Directory Eastside Catholic School Eastside Catholic School is a private, faith-based college-preparatory school in Sammamish, WA serving coed students in grades 6–12. Sammamish | eastsidecatholic.org
Eaton Arrowsmith School Improving the Brain’s Capacity to Learn. Redmond and online programming | eatonarrowsmith.com
Encompass Through early learning, pediatric therapy, and family enrichment, Encompass is a community where ALL children thrive. North Bend and Carnation | encompassnw.org
Hamlin Robinson School An independent school dedicated to igniting the academic and creative potential of students with dyslexia and other language-based learning differences. Seattle | hamlinrobinson.org/learnmore
Kindering Embracing children of diverse abilities and their families. Bellevue, Bothell, Renton, Redmond | kindering.org
Morningside Academy Catch Up and Get Ahead! Seattle | morningsideacademy.org
Resource Directory Northwest Center Kids Early Intervention Northwest Center Kids Early Intervention is a family-centered program for children with developmental delays that takes a team approach, working with parents and caregivers to evaluate and develop functional goals to support children to participate more fully in everyday activities. Seattle and online | nwcenter.org/kids
Seattle Children’s Hospital Seattle Children’s is ranked among the nation’s best children’s hospitals, delivering superior patient care and advancing new discoveries and treatments through pediatric research. Seattle and online | seattlechildrens.org
Seattle Therapy Network Providing client-centered Occupational and Speech Therapy services for Seattle and beyond. Seattle + telehealth (Washington state) | seattle-therapy-network.com
Sound Children’s Therapy Sound Children’s Therapy, PLLC, is a pediatric therapy practice offering occupational, physical, speech, and feeding therapy services to children from birth through adolescence. Issaquah | soundchildrenstherapy.com
Event Challenge Code: RESOURCES
Resource Directory Sproutable Sproutable supports parents and caregivers in growing remarkable kids through online classes, coaching, and video content. Seattle and online | besproutable.com
TiLT Parenting TiLT Parenting offers a weekly podcast, parent education, resources, and a vibrant community to help parents raising differently wired kids do so from a place of confidence, connection, and joy. New York and online | tiltparenting.com
UCMAS Washington World’s Largest Abacus Math Program. Bellevue and Bothell | ucmas-usa.com
Washington 529 College Savings Plans (WA529) Washington 529 College Savings Plans (WA529) — save today for their tomorrow. Olympia | wastate529.wa.gov
Wonderland Child & Family Services Wonderland Child & Family Services is a nonprofit agency serving children with developmental delays, disabilities, and prenatal substance exposure. Shoreline | wonderlandkids.org
Yellow Wood Academy Yellow Wood Academy is a K–12 school for students of all abilities, providing 1:1 and small group classes both online and on campus. Mercer Island | yellowwoodacademy.org
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We offer...
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Pediatric Therapy Speech and language, feeding, occupational, physical and behavioral therapies
Early Learning Preschool, including slots for income-qualifying families, summer camps, toddler groups and more
Family Enrichment Parent/caregiver support groups, workshops and Sibshops, a national program for siblings of children with special needs
425.888.3347 | info@encompassnw.org
What Happens early in life matters.
Igniting the academic and creative potential of students with dyslexia and other language-based learning differences.
LEARN MORE:
www.hamlinrobinson.org/learnmore
Connect with us!
Hamlin Robinson School 1701 20th Avenue S. Seattle, WA 98144
Cultivating Resilience in Children With Special Needs Resources to support families during ‘the most complicated school year in American history’ BY MALIA JACOBSON As families settle into what Washington state Superintendent of Public Instruction Chris Reykdal has called “perhaps the most complicated school year in American history,” the families of students with disabilities are navigating a particularly murky path. From the pandemic’s impact on student rights to coping strategies for behavioral challenges to finding time for self-care, most days offer more questions than answers — and little respite or relief. Thankfully, caregivers don’t need to have all the answers in order to support their student or to patch together a memorable and meaningful school year. More important than having an answer to every question is building resilience, or the ability to bounce back from setbacks. According to Jerri Clark, a parent resource coordinator for the PAVE (Partnerships for Action, Voices for Empowerment) Parent Training and Information program, working through the unique challenges of this school year can set families on a path of learning, discovery and growth that follows just what and how their student wants and needs to learn.
A bridge year The upcoming school year will be complicated for everyone involved, because the most fundamental aspects of teaching and learning — how instruction will be delivered and measured — are very much in flux. Educators are still figuring out how to educate in this new environment, prompting the Washington State Office of Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI) to commit a portion of federal emergency funds available through the Coronavirus Aid, Relief and Economic Security Act to professional development and training in 2020–2021. Which means that as of fall 2020, teachers and school staff are still figuring things out — with a long road ahead. For many, 2020–2021 will be a bridge year spanning the gap between the early crisis of spring 2020 and a new version of normalcy. All of this change is especially hard on students with special needs, including those with disabilities, learning differences or behavioral challenges, says Clark. Students who need therapies previously carried out in person, such as speech or occupational therapies, or children who relied on paraeducators, aides or special education classes were suddenly cut off from important learning supports, along with the familiarity and comfort they provided. Shifting plans, asking questions and finding new ways to communicate with others via technology help prepare students for a fulfilling life beyond school, she notes. “Ultimately, I want to empower my kids to function in real life.”
Resilience reboot The first step to building resilience is getting organized, says Clark. Adapting to a rapidly changing learning environment is easier when you know and understand your child’s daily schedule and learning expectations. “Having children participate in creating the schedule is very calming to the central nervous system,” says Clark. A visible, tangible plan for each day helps Soper’s twins learn at their own pace throughout each day. As homeschoolers who “unschool,” they don’t follow a traditional school-day schedule; instead, Soper plans lessons around the kids’ interests, such as cooking and math. But Soper recently started a new job and knew the family needed more structure. “Personally, I’m terrible with schedules, but this isn’t for me, this is for my kids,” she says. More structure didn’t mean a strict hourly schedule, however. Instead, each twin has a laminated checklist of tasks to complete each day. The list includes activities of daily living (ADLs), such as brushing their teeth, along with chores and learning activities. “When they get up, they know exactly what they need to do for the day. We find that the more questions we can take away, the less stress they have. It’s a task-based list, not a time-based schedule; it takes one twin a lot longer to go through it, but it works for us,” Soper says.
No need to go it alone Adapting to change is also easier when you know where to go for help: “Families need to understand that it’s not all on them to get organized,” says Clark. “Their child’s school can help; parents can call the school and ask for support.” Parents can also ask for training to help them learn more about managing behavior challenges, using online learning programs, and incorporating other resources and ways to support their student. “Parent training can be part of the ‘related services’ in an IEP, or individualized education program, so parents with an IEP in place can request training from their school,” says Clark. Through her work with PAVE’s Parent Training and Information program, Clark helps parents of students with disabilities understand their legal rights. “What I primarily do is teach parents about student rights within special education … no rights have been waived during the pandemic.” How do parents exercise those rights? Even in a pandemic environment, students with special needs still have a federally protected right to a free appropriate public education (FAPE) that’s accessible and inclusive in the least restrictive environment (LRE). Translation: Parents of students with learning differences and disabilities should still expect equitable access to education during the COVID-19 pandemic. Since parents often don’t know how to start those conversations with their school or which questions to ask, PAVE maintains a list of questions, Key Information and Creative Questions for Families to Consider During COVID-19 Closures, to open the dialogue. Simply asking questions helps build resilience by opening important pathways for communication between schools and families. “Parents can ask questions like ‘What is LRE, or least restrictive environment, in the context of COVID? What are other students accessing and how is that equitable
for all students?’” Other queries might center on ways to help children with special needs understand social distancing, or how to make sure continuous learning objectives match a child’s natural curiosities. Learning the language used by school staff and administrators can also make asking questions and getting answers easier. Terms like asynchronous learning, universal design for learning (UDL) and learning management system (LMS) can be unfamiliar to parents at first, so the National Center for Learning Disabilities includes definitions for these and other 2020–2021 education buzzwords in its list of COVID-19 parent resources.
Feel big feelings and breathe Emotional intelligence plays a central role in resilience, says Clark. “Feeling big feelings is one of the most important things for families right now, and parents can ask their schools for support with social-emotional learning to help when the family is at home together all day.” “Families that are afraid of their big feelings are having a hard time finding resilience, because those feelings don’t go away when we don’t acknowledge them,” says Clark. “Emotional intelligence requires noticing what is being experienced.” She often points parents to a strategy called “Name It to Tame It,” outlined in “The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Proven Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind” by Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D., and Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. Clark drew on her background as a yoga instructor to create PAVE’s video tutorials, providing simple mindfulness and breathing exercises to help families feel calmer, more centered and resilient. These practices include “Breathe to Keep From Flipping Your Lid” and “Stop and Settle With Five-Fingers Breath,” and each one takes from two to three minutes. “Breathing practices are absolutely imperative to keep everyone in their front brain,” she says. Whether students learn on a screen, in the kitchen or in their backyard, schooling at home helps weave learning into a student’s daily routine. This transforms learning from something that happens mainly at school or in therapy to something that can happen anywhere, anytime. “When we can make learning part of the daily routine so that it’s engaging for the student and there are opportunities for mastery, the student can feel connected and valued,” says Clark. “That can be critical to engagement with learning right now, and that has the opportunity to be quite a silver lining.”
Remote Learning Resources for Families • National Center for Learning Disabilities: COVID-19 Resources • Open Doors for Multicultural Families: Programs and Services • Dan Siegel: “Name It to Tame It” (video) • Washington Parent and Student Rights for Special Education and Section 504 & Students With Disabilities • PAVE Parent Training and Information • PAVE Fall 2020: Ready or Not (resource list) • PAVE Mindfulness Videos • PAVE Key Information and Creative Questions for Families During COVID-19 Closures
Make their dreams reality Washington College Savings Plans Can help you prepare for your student’s dreams. GET Enrollment opens Nov 1 DreamAhead open year-round
Do You Have a Concern About Your Child’s Development? Northwest Center Kids Early Intervention is here to help families of children from birth to 3 years of age. Our team of specialists can: • • • •
Listen to your concerns Evaluate your child’s development Provide resources for your family Provide a free online evaluation
We speak several different languages and will work with your family to interpret as needed.
nwcenter.org/kids 206-691-2598 Click Here to Get Started
Please reach out today—no physician referral needed.
SAFE, CONTINUOUS LEARNING, IN ANY ENVIRONMENT
We have personalized education for your student, with plans for school-wide on-site learning as well as contingencies for pivoting back to school-wide remote learning.
(425) 885-6296
dartmoorschool.org
Seattle Children’s Program to Enhance Attention, Regulation and Learning (PEARL) is committed to improving care for children and adolescents with ADHD and their families.
Fast Brains and Big Feelings Remote learning strategies for kids with ADHD BY HEIDI LYNN BORST Riding out the coronavirus pandemic on lockdown, we as parents are navigating uncharted waters, and our children are paying the heftiest price. Not only are kids missing out on the essential social outlet that school provides, but the quality of their education is taking a major hit. Leading their children’s learning is a daunting undertaking for parents in general, but when a child has special needs, it can feel downright impossible. Under the confines of remote learning, the delivery of much-needed services to students with disabilities is convoluted at best. While educators agree on the importance of providing continuity of learning at home, the logistics can be tricky. In the classroom setting, children who have an individualized education program (IEP) or a 504 plan receive customized accommodations to support their unique differences, be they academic, social, emotional and/or behavioral. My rising second-grader, who has ADHD, receives plenty of hands-on, one-on-one interaction with his teacher, along with many other supports outlined in his IEP. With the current amalgam of daily video-conferencing meetings, recorded lessons and instructional worksheets, most of my son’s IEP supports are missing from the picture. I’m left to fill in the blanks — a job for which I don’t feel the least bit qualified. Even so, there are solid measures we can take as parents to foster a supportive learning experience for our kiddos. Read on for expert strategies to make remote learning a success.
Create a routine to add structure at home. For busy parents already juggling their own workloads, it’s simply not possible to supervise every minute of their child’s learning. What we can do is provide our children with structure. “Chaotic and unpredictable isn’t a good setup for learning. Use pictures to create a visual schedule that is really concrete and predictable. We want the schedule to prompt our kids, so we don’t have to be the one reminding them,” says Shanna Alvarez, Ph.D., a psychologist and codirector of the Incredible Years program at The Seattle Clinic. For kids with ADHD who need help staying focused in the classroom, it’s important to eliminate household distractions that make remote learning harder. “Kids with ADHD have more difficulty with self-control, impulsivity and motivation, so it’s important to be proactive from day one. Have a structure and physical plan for each day,” says Mark Stein, Ph.D., ABPP, director of the Program to Enhance Attention, Regulation and Learning (PEARL) for ADHD and related disorders at Seattle Children’s Hospital. Moving from one task to another is difficult, so be sure to plan for transition time between activities, using scheduled breaks and external prompts such as timers, Stein says. Predictability might be boring, but it provides kids with stability. “Kids need the comfort and regularity
of a structured routine. Routine is the most important part of the school day. At the beginning of the year, we spend every minute we can on learning the routine until everyone in the class has it memorized. It’s easier to run through the day when everyone knows what to expect,” says Michael Wojcio, a special education teacher at Marshall Elementary School in South Orange, New Jersey. “At home, find a room and make it school, so your child knows this is where they go to learn.” Once you’ve designated a learning space for your child and established a routine, adhere to it as much as possible, making changes whenever something isn’t working.
Take a ‘brain break’ and get moving. Studies show engaging in physical activity improves behavior, increases focus and attention, and reduces stress. Instead of expecting your child to sit glued to their lessons all day, allow plenty of opportunities for movement. “I don’t think movement breaks should be as routine as most things, because kids don’t necessarily need a break at say, 10:15 a.m. every day — they need it when they need it,” says Wojcio. Find fun ways to sprinkle movement into your child’s day, such as putting on a “Just Dance” video, doing a series of pushups or jumping jacks, or heading out for a family walk or bike ride. “My favorite go-to is running, because it gets the whole body involved. Get your kid to run a lap around the block, so they get their energy out, their blood flowing, their heart pumping and their brain moving. It’s probably the best thing you can do for them, physically,” says Wojcio. Get in on the action and get moving with your child — modeling an active lifestyle makes kids more likely to follow our lead.
Work with your child’s team to implement accommodations at home. Reach out to your child’s teacher for help putting IEP accommodations into practice at home. “Kids with ADHD often have associated problems with learning, speech, fine motor skills or social difficulties. They should be getting the same accommodations at home that they were getting in school. How does the learning environment need to be adapted and what is the most appropriate educational plan for them? Communicate a lot with teachers and schools and the IEP team,” says Stein. Take the initiative when collaborating with your child’s team, advises Alvarez. “Show the school what you’re doing on your end to increase predictability and add structure to your child’s routine. Ask them what else you can do to embed your child’s academic work into the structures already in place at home, so that when difficulties arise, you have the tools in place to support them.” Be sure to factor in the effect of any medication your child has been prescribed, notes Stein. “Meet with your child’s pediatrician or provider to make sure their medication is appropriate for home learning. Long-acting stimulants may not be appropriate for a three- to four-hour learning period. Side effects occur at different times. Some medications take longer to take effect, some are associated with being sleepy; that’s not something you want in a child during an active part of learning.”
Equip kids with a toolbox for emotional regulation. Children with ADHD experience intense emotions that hit hard and fast, causing mood swings and
reactive behavior. With the right tools, kids are better able to reset and calm down before those big emotions take over. “First, make an honest assessment of how your child’s behavior and emotional regulation were before school started. Can your child self-regulate and calm down when they have big emotions? How often is physical or verbal aggression happening? We need to increase the peace and wellness of our kids before we worry about academic success,” says Alvarez. Our instinct may be to protect our kids from adversity, but it’s an inevitable part of life. By framing stress in a positive way, we help our kids develop the life skills they need, says Alvarez. “Parents need to teach frustration tolerance and balance, giving our kids tools that increase connection and a positive inner script by making more deposits than withdrawals. For a kid with ADHD, every command and question [represents] a withdrawal. Even if we make deposits through child-led play and connection, our children require more. Allocate time at the end of each day to play [one-on-one] with your child, allowing them to lead without doing any teaching. Just be an appreciative audience.” By helping our kids experience gratitude, pride and compassion, we teach them to harness their abilities into positive ends. “Kids with fast brains and big feelings have superpowers. Intensity is a gift that can help them pursue their goals,” says Alvarez.
Prioritizing self-care is not selfish. We can’t look after our kids if we aren’t looking after ourselves, says Sinéad Quinn, a Seattle-based wellness and empowerment coach and self-proclaimed “emotionally stable hot mess mom.” “As difficult as this situation has been for everyone, it’s been worse for families with kids who need support. It’s very easy to get caught up in the anger and frustration of our situation. We’re already carrying extra weight, so it’s very challenging to keep calm and keep steady.” Quinn recommends that parents double-down on self-care through sleep, breath work, meditation, hydration and gratitude — all of which serve to support their own mental health. Certainly, none of us signed up for this, and the additional pressure on parents to pilot their children’s education is overwhelming. “Most parents don’t have degrees in elementary or special education, and it’s really challenging. They have a lot on their plate already and they need to make sure they’re in a good state and prepared for taking this on, having realistic expectations. Parents have to balance their job with their overall well-being, not just their child’s learning,” says Stein. Quinn says she’s had to shift her perspective of what is attainable. “We don’t realize it: We put so many expectations on ourselves and on our child and it’s not possible. Expectations are premeditated resentments. We have to do what is achievable in our own home.” While the road ahead holds many unknowns, one thing is certain: We deserve to give ourselves a break. Our kids need us now more than ever, and we owe it to them to show up being at our best.
Thank you! Thanks for attending ParentMap’s 2020 Every Child Summit! We hope you learned something new, made meaningful connections and discovered practical tools to help your exceptional child thrive. For more awesome parenting events, visit: ParentMap.com/live. We hope to see you online again soon! — The
ParentMap team