What is your parenting style? A closer look at the way parents discipline their children by Suzanne Dottin-Hinkson
14
According to developmental psychologists, research suggests that there are four basic parenting styles. They range from the very controlling parent, to one that neglects or is uninvolved with their child. As you read further, you may be able to identify with one or more of these parenting styles. Note which category you may fall under. They are: 1: The Authoritarian parent. - Authoritarian parents are highly demanding and directive, but not responsive. They are obedience and status-oriented, and expect their orders to be obeyed without explanation. These parents provide well-ordered and structured environments with clearly stated rules. Children from these homes are well-behaved and perform well in school, but may exhibit poor social skills, lower selfesteem and higher levels of depression. 2: The Authoritative parent. - Authoritative parents are both demanding and responsive. They monitor and impart clear standards for their children’s conduct. Their disciplinary methods are supportive, rather than punitive. And their children are socially competent with little to no behavioural problems. 3: The Indulgent (Permissive) parent. - Indulgent parents are more responsive than they are demanding. They are non-traditional and lenient, do not require mature behaviour, allow considerable self-regulation, and avoid confrontation. Such children perform poorer in school but have lower levels of depression. 4: The Uninvolved parent. - Uninvolved parents are low in both responsiveness and demandingness. In extreme cases, this parenting style might encompass both rejecting-neglecting and neglectful parents. These children exhibit bad behaviour with poor social skills.
T
he job of parenting is one of the hardest, yet most rewarding tasks on this earth, and yet it does not receive the degree of respect and attention that it deserves. Most people model what their parents did as a guide to how they raise their own children. However the crucial question is: did their parent or guardian do a great job at raising
them?
Raising a child in this modern era requires much prayer, attention, love, care, discipline, self-sacrifice and a lot of patience. (And again I say patience). These qualities cause many to question their own style of parenting. Parenting today • JULY 2016
Research reports based on interviews concluded that the authoritative style was most preferred, because it created a balance between insisting that your child obeyed the rules along with being responsive to their emotional needs. “It balances high parental responsiveness and demandingness with the recognition of child autonomy, which are important components of good parenting.” I often find it ironic that in other professions like medicine, engineering, teaching or accounting in order to become qualified one must attend classes, sit examinations and receive certification. So why is it not mandatory for people to become trained before taking on