DECLASSIFIEDS

Too scared to ask out that hot girl from Rels class? Have a thought you’re dying to share? Did a professor say something strange or funny? Do you have some information that you want to get out to the student body? Whatever it is, the declassifieds are here for you. Submit yours at www.marshillnewspaper.com/declassifieds

TWU likes to store its students in residence buildings kept strictly between the temperatures of 1°C - 4°C, similar to that of your household refrigerator.

Someone told me I looked like I walked out of the Narnia closet. It was amazing.

Plantacided was committed on Tuesday night at 11:20 pm in Skidmore.

Snowman slaughter was committed outside RNT by Marko. He argues he should not be prosecuted as he breathed life back into it.

Did y’all know that Jordan has twin?

What the frick is the difference between sarcastic, facetious, and ironic?

Will Jacobson be open in time for exam week? Stay tuned… i am so broke help

“Lots of death-just how we like it”-SarahGrace

TWU please, im begging you... shut the damn bell up

If climate change is the greatest global issue of our time why wasn’t COP27 a virtual event?

Did the Well’s funding get cut? why is it barely open this year? It’s sad as it’s such a good place for students

Snow removal has been trash this year. Why is it 5 days into the snow and we still have ice on the sidewalks

I despise profs who cancel multiple 3 hour classes. I had a prof cancel two this semester -which is like 4 classes if it was twice a week. What am I actually paying for if my prof doesn’t show up for classes to teach??

I feel like I could pull anyone with these shoes on-Twu overhead

Cover artist: Milo Fritz

Get over it

The barbecue pulled pork sandwich is the only thing at the book store Caf that is worth 10.95

To thou who circles the RNT loop in their car after dark, you are an inspiration for all

Why don’t Columbia Bible College rels courses transfer anymore? It’s a quality school

TWU really kicking us out of our apartment of 3 years for some freshmen who can’t swim

Hot take we need less Christmas break. (That rhymed)

Dear Mars Hill; I was doing a search on Google for “orthodoxy vs orthopraxy” and “Mars Hill” came up as the third hit. How delighted to find out that this was from TWU! I am a 1996 TWU alumni and enjoyed finding a chance to be proud of this great school!

Jay Reimer (TWU 1996)

Trinity rangers on instagram like “lets slap the ugliest colour grade known to man onto these photos”

You took 9 months to figure out that trick? You could’ve made a baby in that time!

I resonate with everyone egg

The REAL egg poster would NOT have missed two issues [blowing steam out of nose emoji]

Who is dropping $672 on 15 grad photos after a 100k degree

To the first year Ed student from Fraser who helped me carry a coffee table to RNT: I forgot your name but you were so helpful and kind! Thank you and say hi if you see me again!

Mark Husbands... Go with God; but please go!

I heard from kate Muchmore woo that there are rocks on the ceiling fned is BACK! egg Want more?

Patti Victor for TWU President!

Mars’ Hill should publish more often, I really like reading about what that Arts and Culture Editor guy writes Sarcastic, possibly ironic comment

I send so many email :( whyyyy

Breaking news! Hannah Gallandt-“AHHHH”

PLEASE wear deodorant in the library. it is absolutely rank up here the incessant beeping in the Douglas lounge is driving me insane - I CAN HEAR

“Jesus died on the cross to open the gates to Cybertron.”

There aren’t enough Mormons at this school

We need more Mormons at this school. More mons, some would say.

I believe all men are gay until proven otherwise #she/her things

Manny the Mammoth is NOT a cool dilf

I love psychoanalysing men

Y’all it’s the season of love

That being said, I want love

Anyone want to make borscht

I had the most amazing everything shower

Coffee makes me sh—

When researching “epoch,” I was really drawn to the element of transformation and change that comes with the beginning of each era. The focal point of the piece is the hand reaching toward the water. The hand represents humanity, and the tattooed leaves symbolize life and growth. The water symbolizes a number of things, most of all it symbolizes change. Water is fluid and constantly moving, ushering in new life and carrying what is dead to its next destination. On the water is Charon, the ferryman of the underworld in Greek mythology. Above him is the sun; the sun has been seen as a symbol of transformation in many cultures across history. It rises and sets, bringing in a new day and ending it with a beautiful display of colours. In the top right, there is a dove, which symbolizes new life and hope. The clouds across the whole

I personally believe that people are putting friends over jobs

Sometimes you need to reflect and maybe you do deserve better friends I need more hugs in my life

I think one of my love languages is physical touch but I’m terrified of people touching me

Seth personally asked me to do more declassifieds DO NOT make borscht! It will betray you, it’s powers are not always for good. I repeat, do NOT make borscht. West-Coast COLLEGIUM gang. Woohooo!!!

Monty python is the modern Shakespeare

Did the math once about when Dr. Rowe and his wife started dating and I have to say that his wife clearly knows how to work a system. I have so much respect for those two it’s insane.

“I’m pretty sure Angela Bassett is God” - Seth Schouten Editor’s Note: I stand by this statement. —Seth

“That’s it I’m whipping the Japanese keyboard out”Sent Long

“Makeup that looks like dirt...

F—, was I supposed to do that??” - Seth oh shoot…….. I made the borscht

“Watch your beef-loving mouth”

Mr Nezzer should be Vader and Mr Lunt should be Palpatine

I haven’t been able to make my favourite pasta since I broke up with my Italian gf. Rip.

Boston pizza charged us for auto tax………

“I’m sorry, could you please repeat that? I got distracted reading about lesbianism.” if anyone else confesses their feelings for me im gonna throw up. im not looking for a ring until at least next winter.

Alex Walker’s “Burger Queen” is the great anti-capitalist manifesto of our time Talk is overrated, lets just vibe. And love is overrated in mind.

Does anyone if Steven Coulter is single?

Kinda wanna ask him out [monkey covering eyes emoji]

MRS degree?? More like Master of Rizz Sciences !!!

‘t Hart makes my heart go thud thud thud [black heart emoji]

Did you guys hear that Maddy McMillan’s greatgrand-pappy McMillan built McMillan (the building) with his bare hands?

HELP, I DRANK OVER A LITRE OF ALOE VERA DRINK. I’M GONNA SH— MY PANTS.

Andrew Borschtard

Do you need to followers and blue tick piece represent opportunities for growth. The colouring of the sky was heavily inspired by Van Gogh. I love how he was able to make his paintings seem alive, and I wanted to capture that effect. The overall message of this artwork is that change is constant: things begin and end, and there’s no way to stop it. What we can do, however, is embrace it. We can rise and set like the sun and seize any opportunity for growth that comes our way. Change is not a time of despair, it is a time to grow.

Maybe the borscht isn’t actually that bad . . . maybe there are blessings that come out of it. We shouldn’t be so harsh on its powers without giving it some time.

Mars’ Hill reserves the right to edit or reject submissions based on content and/or length. A printed submission does not reflect an endorsement of any kind, nor does it reflect the opinions of Mars’ Hill or its staff, the student association, or Trinity Western University.

Milo Fritz is a third-year linguistics student minoring in political studies. He is a self-taught artist, and one can often find them doodling in class.