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etiquette
ANSWERS
A
& Q
Wedding
Straight talk, smart solutions by Mary Clarke, Editor in Chief
Q
I plan to take my husband’s last name after we’re married and will notify business clients of the change. What’s the most professional way to do so via email?
A
It’s best to send a mass mailing to clients stating “For future reference, please note my new email and last name, Marisa (maiden name) Wright.” Keep your old email address for a while and if any of your clients continue to use it, notify them again of your new email and name change. Also, be sure to inform the following organizations of your new last name: Social Security (you’ll need an original marriage license for verification), voter registration, credit-card issuers, banks, insurance companies, frequent-flyer programs, utility companies, investment firms and your doctors. And don’t forget to get a new passport and driver’s license. Plus, it’s a good idea to carry two photo IDs with you for a while, one with your maiden name and the other with your married name in case you ever encounter a problem when dealing with any of the above institutions. GUEST PLUS-ONE?
Q A
My fiancé’s parents think everyone invited to a wedding should be able to bring a guest. What’s the rule?
The rule: You don’t need to extend plus-ones to single friends and family members. In fact, most couples don’t— unless they have an unlimited budget. You should, however, include partners of the following: anyone married, engaged or living with a significant other and anyone who is in a long-term relationship.
FLOWER GIRL FEES?
Q
My daughter is going to be a flower girl in my brother’s wedding, and the maid of honor asked if I would like to help pay for the bridal shower. As much as I’d like to participate, we are on a tight budget. Am I expected to contribute to the cost of the shower?
A
No, not at all. The bridal shower is the bridesmaids’ responsibility. The mothers of the bride and groom may also offer to chip in. The parents of the flower girl and ring bearer are only required to pay for their children’s attire, shoes and accessories and any travel or lodging expenses. You can politely decline and offer to help with decorating and setup, if you’re able. Let your brother and his fiancé know about her request. Should there be any grumbling, your future sister-in-law can set the record straight with her attendants. SAVE-THE-DATE QUERY
Q A
On our save-the-date notices, should we ask our guests to RSVP by text or email?
Your save-the-date notices do not require an RSVP. They’re sent simply to alert guests as to the time and place of the wedding so they’ll have ample opportunity to make their travel arrangements. Reply cards are enclosed with the wedding invitation only. However, if you and your fiancé would like to get a rough estimate now, you can follow through with emails or texts. Keep in mind, though, that it may be too early for some people to confirm, so be sure
to get your invitations out four months before the big day (especially if it’s a destination wedding), and ask to have responses in at least 10 weeks before the wedding. That should give you plenty of time to finalize all of the details with your pros. GIFT QUANDARY
Q
What’s the right amount of money for a wedding gift? I don’t want to appear super-cheap, but I’m desperately trying to pay off my student debt.
A
There isn’t a golden rule or any set amount that’s considered appropriate for a wedding gift. Basically, you give what you can afford. With student loans to pay off along with other living expenses, it’s perfectly understandable that you might not be able to be as generous as you’d like. If writing a check makes you feel uncomfortable, then select an item from the couple’s registry that suits your budget. Your friends will love getting a gift they registered for, but more importantly, they’ll be glad you were there on the big day to share in their celebration. ››› Go to bridalguide.com/QA for more etiquette advice. And send your planning questions to us at mail@bridalguide.com.
PHOTOGRAPHY: COURTESY OF THOMASZ WAGNER
THE NAME GAME
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fresh PICKS Reach new fashion heights with these soft, romantic and effortlessly stylish gowns befitting any nuptial celebration. PHOTOGRAPHY BY TERRY DOYLE
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HIGH SOCIETY Step back in time with a gown reminiscent of Regency-era romance. Strapless, mini-jacquard mermaid with empire waist and satin waistband, about $5,000, and dramatic mikado cape, about $2,500, by Viktor&Rolf Mariage; viktor-rolf.com. Green tassel earrings by Mahrukh Akuly Jewelry; mahrukhakulyjewelry.com. Satin gloves by Greatlookz; davidsbridal. com. Three-stone engagement ring by Christopher Designs; christopherdesigns.com. Wallpaper mural by The Inspire Decor; etsy.com/ shop/theinspiredecor 000
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THE MOST ROMANTIC DESTINATION WEDDING & HONEYMOON GETAWAYS
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TWO NEW YORKERS TRAVEL BACK IN TIME PG 8
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WHERE FOREVER BEGINS With beautiful scenery and settings, South Walton is ideal for bringing family and friends together to celebrate. VISIT SOUTH WALTON. COM /WEDDINGS
MIRAMAR BEACH • SEASCAPE • SANDESTIN • DUNE ALLEN • GULF PLACE • SANTA ROSA BEACH • BLUE MOUNTAIN BEACH GRAYTON BEACH • WATERCOLOR • SEASIDE • SEAGROVE • WATERSOUND • SEACREST • ALYS BEACH • ROSEMARY BEACH • INLET BEACH
FIRST LOOK
Splendido Mare,
PHOTOGRAPHY: BELMOND
Spelendido Mare, a Belmond Hotel recently reopened after a redesign.
Classic Italian beauty.
a Belmond Hotel
T
Sneak a peek at one of the hottest new hotels where romantic amenities are always on offer.
he Italian coastline, with its pastel buildings hugging mountains that meet the Mediterranean Sea, is a forever romantic ideal that’s captured in treasured novels and classic cinema. One such film, The Barefoot Contessa, and its glamorous star Ava Gardner had an indelible influence on the uber intimate—and aptly LOCAL FAVORITES named—Splendido Mare, a Belmond Hotel, a jewel CASTELLO BROWN Flaunting box hideaway positioned on Portofino’s main piazzetta some of the best views of the fishing and fronting the picturesque harbor. The first of the village and its marina, this ancient Belmond resort collection to be totally revamped by military fortress turned private home fashionable owners LVMH, the haute hotel is chic, is now a museum hosting rotating serene and utterly romantic. cultural events and exhibits. A grand reopening unveiled unparalleled sophisTHE CHRIST OF THE ABYSS tication in all aspects of the intimate guest house— Submerged nearly 50 feet under there are just 14 rooms. Decor is a masterful blend the water’s surface, this bronze statue was lowered onto the seabed of vintage and modern pieces that pay homage to in 1954. Scuba excursions to the 1950s ideal of la dolce vita and the property’s the recently refurbished piece leave location adjacent to the sea. There are wood and from neighboring San Fruttuoso. woven headboards and bespoke pieces crafted BAR MORENO Peach Bellinis and from reclaimed boats. Only-in-Italy items include spritzes are served along with Murano glass lighting, handmade terracotta floors pizzas, appetizers and unbeatable and sumptuous linens. The Ava Gardner suite with village and water views. its expansive stone terrace overlooking the harbor is a showstopper. Meals here are best savored harborPostcard-perfect Portofino. side and alfresco and followed with a gelato from the on-site parlor, where tastings can also be arranged. Guests here enjoy exclusive access to sister property Splendido with its spectacular pool and amazing spa (room rates start at about $670 a night and include breakfast; belmond.com) —Jenna Mahoney
A restyled guest room.