october 18,2010 What Does Cheating Really Mean? Victoria E.S. Melhado: A Passion for Service Hitting Every Muscle in Five Minutes
Quote of The Week A hero has faced it all: he need not be undefeated, but he must be undaunted. Andrew Bernstein
Editor’s Note Hi Readers,
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Today is Heroes Day. While we reflect on the contributions of our national heroes, let us also take a moment to acknowledge the everyday heroes in our lives. Every so often, one can get caught up in his or her own life, that they never take the time to see how they can contribute to society. Meet Victoria, a nurse by profession who believes that her career is just as fulfilling as giving back to society. All this, and a lot more in this week’s issue of Your Style
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relationships
What Does
Cheating Really Mean?
‘’Tis’ my opinion that every man cheats in his own way, and he is only honest who is not discovered.’’ - Susannah Centlivre (1667-1723)
T
he author of the quote above was an English poet, playwright, actress and she was also spot on with her cynical assessment of the relationship habits of men. What she may have neglected to mention is that these traits are not confined to the XX phenotype or perhaps women were not predisposed to cheating when Susannah Centlivre was alive. Though it would be nice to think that women have simply evolved to be cheaters as a response to the actions of their male counterparts, I think I’ll just go with the notion that Susannah just hadn’t finished her quote. The quote evokes different feelings in different people, and I would imagine there are women who have been wronged who will use this quote as confirmation of their worst fears. There are women who will disregard this as the product of undue cynicism, and some women who will simply admit that there are exceptions to every rule. Men will usually voice agreement to the last two while secretly agreeing with the quote. But then again, examining the quote you will find that it is very open to interpretation.
about a crime but doesn’t commit it isn’t guilty of it, is he? Well, that’s basically what the author of the quote would like us to think. I don’t necessarily agree. The thing that separates the quality of men (and women) is the level of restraint that they establish on themselves. Human beings are susceptible to urges but it is the acting on these urges that will be the defining factor, since that mindreading device isn’t readily available at Azan’s.
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Though most people have a very clear idea of what cheating is, there are quite a few grey areas and even that clear idea is affected by the personalities of the people in the relationship.
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So, should we approach every relationship from a standpoint as cynical (or realistic) as the quote suggests? I say find your own level, make your own assessments and give yourself a chance to be happy. You might get hurt but then again you may not; it’s kind of like everything else in life, nothing is 100 percent sure.
Though most people have a very clear idea of what cheating is, there are quite a few grey areas and even that clear idea is affected by the personalities of the people in the relationship. By her quote, it wouldn’t be hard to imagine that Ms. Centlivre would consider a man who has impure thoughts about another woman to be a cheater. This is another case of interpretation, because a man who thinks
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cover story
Victoria E.S. Melhado
A Passion for Service
G
rowing up, volunteerism was always a big part of Victoria Melhado’s life from the social outreach programmes in her community to wherever she could lend a helping hand. Her love for helping others and giving back guided her to become a nurse, but eventually her heart led her even further to recently launching a non-profit, faith-based, social outreach organisation called “The Be Inspired Ministries”. “I have been a facilitator for the support group of persons living with HIV/ AIDS, and I’ve mentored and counselled pregnant women through Women’s Centre Jamaica, and at some point I knew that I wanted to start my own organisation geared towards social outreach,” Melhado says.
ministry is not limited at all as we also offer social outreach programmes, retreats, health fairs and promotion of some cultural arts in the form of poetry and dancing,” she added. Another one of Melhado’s loves is poetry. The poetry-writing nurse has released a book titled “Be Inspired”, which consists of a collection of poems that she has written over the years. Considered to be very inspirational and quite motivational, the collection is currently available at all major bookstores island wide. All proceeds from book sales will go directly to the organisation. “I have been writing poems since I was nine,” she says. “The poems lifted my spirit whenever I felt depressed or had problems that I didn’t want to share at that moment.”
The “Be Inspired Ministries” seeks to support the less privileged in society by focusing on its target groups, which are primarily vulnerable youth and dysfunctional families. “The
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cover story With so much on her plate, Melhado says she is never pressed for time as she believes that time management is an art. She has remained focused on what she hopes to achieve and is steadfast in the pursuit of her dreams, while still finding time to socialise, attend church and enjoy a rather fulfilling life. Though she confesses that her chosen profession might not be replete with financial rewards, the satisfaction that she receives far outweighs the monetary benefits. “When persons show their appreciation by even a simple “Thank you Nurse” or “Thank you Victoria”, or when you feel as if you
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Not to point any fingers at any government in particular, where the state of our economy is presently is not the fault of any one administration but due to a combination of factors over the years.
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have touched a person’s life in any manner at all, you feel as if you are doing something right,” says a smiling Melhado. Being a part of a society that is so riddled with crime and violence and many other social issues, Melhado believes that our civil servants are greatly undervalued and this has deterred many from entering such a noble field that adds great value to our country. “[I’m not going] to point any fingers at any government in particular, [since] where the state of our economy is presently is not the fault of any one administration but due to a combination of factors over the years,” she explains. Despite the circumstances, she believes that her work is a divine calling and that’s what keeps her motivated and steadfast to her task. She draws most of her inspiration from well-known neurosurgeon Dr. Ben Carson. “I am nowhere close to fulfilling my dream,” says the vibrant and optimistic midwife at Victoria Jubilee Hospital, who believes that there is still much to be thankful for in our little island.
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fitness
Hitting Every Muscle inFive
Minutes
eyond busy? Today’s woman acts in various capacity: career oriented, mother and wife while at the B same time still needs to find time to get her fitness level up. Try this fast, total-body routine.
Clean and Press
1
2
Minute: 0:00-1:00 Targets shoulders, back, butt, legs a. Stand with feet shoulder-width apart and place a 5-pound dumbbell on the floor near each foot. Squat, bringing the dumbbells to the outside of your knees, palms down. b. Stand, bringing the dumbbells to your hips, then raise the weights through your shoulders and overhead. Lower and repeat for 60 seconds
4
Push-Up Plus
PliĂŠ Squat and Biceps Curl
3
Minute: 2:00-3:00 Targets biceps, butt, inner thighs Stand with feet shoulder-width apart and toes pointed out, holding a 5-pound dumbbell in each hand with arms extended palms up. Bend knees 90 degrees, squatting as you curl weights toward your shoulders. Return to start and repeat for 60 seconds.
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Minute: 3:00-4:00 Targets shoulders, chest, triceps, abs, back Begin in full push-up position, palms on floor under shoulders and legs extended. Do one push-up, then carefully lift your left hand off the floor, extending your arm out to side. Holding here, lift your right foot off the floor. Lower hand and foot to floor. Do another push-up and repeat with opposite hand and foot. Continue, alternating sides.
Source:
Side Lunge and Row
Minute: 1:00-2:00 Targets back, butt, legs
Stand with feet shoulder-width apart, holding a pair of 5-pound dumbbells at your sides. Take a big step out to the right with your right foot, bending right knee 90 degrees while keeping left leg straight. Draw your left elbow straight up, keeping arm close to side and butt tight. Return to start and repeat for 30 seconds; switch sides.
5
Push-Up Plus
Minute: 3:00-4:00 Targets shoulders, chest, triceps, abs, back Begin in full push-up position, palms on floor under shoulders and legs extended. Do one push-up, then carefully lift your left hand off the floor, extending your arm out to side. Holding here, lift your right foot off the floor. Lower hand and foot to floor. Do another push-up and repeat with opposite hand and foot. Continue, alternating sides. your style eZine
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