Old Spice

I

I

Fl'liON

vee "I'm just thinking about the line for would stay. He still counted on her abject generosity, she thought. Like the pate at Balducci's."

"Why don't I run over to the bank and time he'd gotten busted at a Grateful Dead concert in Syracuse. He'd used his you can start shopping?" one phone call to call her. Not a lawyer, "Okay."

"Give me a kiss, 'cause I can 't stand not someone within a fifty-mile radius. you," he suddenly said. He pulled her He'd called Jessie , knowing she'd make close, quickly. "Okay. You're done . the trip from Boston in a borrowed Buick Don 't get too friendly with the vege- Skylark. And she had, driving apprehenBy Liane Kupferberg Carter sively across Route 90, reaching Albany table man."

The letter came for Jessie one rainy She turned the corner. Already she by midnight, where she stopped only for Saturday, on her way out. She was head- could smell pumpernickel-onion rye, ra- a cup of coffee and a rare cigarette. She ed to the dry cleaner's , the bank, and the tatouille, and the mixed aromas of hun- sped on through dark and dreary industrial towns till she reached the police stafood emporium , although it was the kind dreds of cheeses. of day when she ' d have preferred to The store was crowded, as usual. She tion in Syracuse much later. She bailed watch old movies on TV , pay the bills, or sighed , found a cart, and pushed her way him out by morning and drove him back reread Jane Eyre. to the back of the produce section, past to the musty house he shared with four The letter was buried beneath a renew- strawberries that looked pumped with guys from school, while he regaled her al notice from the New Yorker, a Lord & hormones, wax-perfect apples, plump with stories of his night in prison. "I realTaylor black-and-white sale catalog, a strings of figs. It was empty there. ly slept on a plank ," he said in disbelief. bill from American Express, the Metro- Wedged between the turnips and pota- "And they took away my shirt and belt.

Can you believe it?" politan Museum calendar, and a thank- toes, she pulled out thdetter.

What she couldn't believe now, ten you note from a pair of just-married Its return address was somewhere outfriends . The handwriting on the letter side San Francisco. She turned it over years later, was that he still assumed she was familiar-the curlicues and flour- and caught a whiff of Old Spice. Is he still would drive to the proverbial ends of the ishes of an architect's Rapidograph pen, spraying his stationery? she thought irri- earth for him. Or, even more, put him up the unevenly sized letters. tably. Once, at least ten years ago , she with his child bride in her cramped apart" Anything interesting?" Michael used to spritz her letters to him with a ment. She had to admit she was curious asked impatiently . He was dressed too bottle of Norell. They had written every to meet this eighteen-year-old southern warmly and eager to leave. day they were apart, and her mailbox had honey Carl had called to tell her about. It "The usual ," she said absently, tuck- always seemed to smell of him. was not long after she was engaged to ing the letter into her purse very careful"Darling," he wrote . "It's been much Michael, a divorced man she'd met at ly. She would wait for the right moment too long since I let you know what I'm up the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Carl to read it, away from MichaeL to . Ellie and I are living just north of San heard from a mutual friend that Jessie They stopped in front of the cleaner's Francisco. We're renting an ugly gray was engaged; three weeks later, he on Ninth Street, and Jessie carried in an house on the beach, raising dope and called in an exuberant mood to tell armful of shirts. The man behind the stray cats. I lost the job I came out here her that he , too , was getting married.

"But who is she? How did you meet? counter greeted her expansively. for over some stupid business about bor"Hello, darling, what've you got for rowing some of the company's mailing It's so sudden!" said Jessie .

"About six weeks ago she was dating me ? Hmm? You smell delicious. Light lists, and I'd love to get a job with Indusstarch, cardboard, in boxes, right? So trial Light and Magic, but for the mean- my next-door neighbor. We liked each what are you doing today? You get that time I'm selling computer hardware from other right off. I get along with her as husband of yours to take you somewhere here to Monterey. Six months ago we well as I did with you. In fact, better. We special. Nice man-never gives me a spent eight weeks in the Far East. We never fight .''

"Give it time," she said sardonically. hard time with his shirts. You take care, rented a place in Bali for part of the time.

"So then I got a job offer in California, Finally tried Thai cooking-! had to darling."

"Have a nice chat?" Michael asked chase it down with Rolaids! Seems they and I asked her to come with me, and when she reappeared. tone it down for the tourists, too. Finally Ellie said absolutely not unless we were ''The usual patter. They do a good job, got to India-kept thinking I should be married, so I said sure, why not."

"When did this all happen?" though ," she said. seeing that with you. Gave up on being a "About two hours ago! You're the first He took her hand. They walked vegetarian, too-with all those cows toward Sixth Avenue . At the corner of walking around, I missed hamburgers! person we've called. Would you like to Fifth they passed another couple hand Ellie sends love. We'll be coming into say hello to ,her?"

"No, I'd feel silly. Just-just give her in hand. Her hair was magenta; his was New York for a convention-think you cut in a Mohawk. Jessie did not no- could put us up? Hope you still have my best. WHen's the wedding?"

"In January. I'm getting married betice them. room. No kids yet, I hope . Can't see you "Jesus, look at that shmohawk!" Mi- stuck in that. That's about all-we'll give fore you."

So that 's what this is about, she you a call when we land in N.Y. on the chael remarked : "Hmm?" 23rd. All my love, Carl." thought, then pushed aside her anger.

"Are you okay? You're so quiet."

No question, he simply assumed he "What's Ellie like?"

In another time, Jessie was another girl! Could the vagabond lover she'd chased after then still have magic enough to disrupt her tidy, settled, quietlv contented life?

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OLD SPICE [continued]

"Very pretty. Petite . Blue eyes, very sweet. . . . " "I just can't believe you're finally doing it. This means if I invited you to my wedding, I couldn't set you up with any of my gorgeous single friends," she said, feeling spiteful.

"Oh no, don't tell me that!" he said , with longing and alarm . The conversation had ended quickly. That was the last time they'd spoken. She had received a hastily printed invitation to their wedding, complete with Carl's hand-drawn directions to the chapel in rural New Hampshire. Jessie and Michael had sent regrets that they would be out of town that week, which was true. Later, Jessie heard from someone who'd been at the wedding that Carl's best man , Frank, had gotten caught for drunken driving and trying to outruh a cop the night before, but somehow the wedding was pulled off. They'd left for sunnier climes, and Jessie had forgotten about it in the excitement of designing her own wedding .

It was strange to think of Carl as anyone's husband . On their first date, when she was almost eighteen and he an older man of twenty-one, and both were secret virgins, he had said, "I may never get married-at least not for another ten years at least." Jessie and Carl had been each other's first love , and he ' d sworn his eternal love in a document he'd drawn up and illustrated, called Contra ct of Love, naming him the lover, her the lovee, in which he'd promised his love until several conditions might render it null and void: when mountains crumbled, the earth stopped spinning, or Atlantis rose from the sea.

Yet on her twentieth birthday, Carl was too broke to take her to dinner unless she paid-and she gave in. Later she discovered that the reason he had no money was that he'd been squandering it on drugs and intimate lunches with Susanne, a typist from his office who had once dated a mobster. That had hurt . But not as much as the night after she'd had the abortion. Scared and hurting, she'd called Carl in the middle of the long night , only to be told by his disgruntled roommate that Carl had gone to Vermont with some girl for the weekend .

She'd left him then. They both cried.

But she'd gotten up, had left his waterbed and fled to New York, where she found a small apartment in the East Village, got her master's at Columbia, and found a job in a clinic for abused women.

Carl had called every few months, had even visited occasionally. They'd shared her bed, but only once did Jessie let him make love to her, and they'd both cried afterward. They did not speak again after that until the phone call about his marriage . . ..

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"What's wrong, did the vegetable man get fresh?" said Michael.

Jessie started. "I didn't see you," she said. " Obviously. What are you doing back here?"

"Thinking."

"Well, I want to shop, so give me the cart." He reached for fresh peas, and she watched hiin bend over the bin, utterly absorbed , and she was again grateful for his sure, quick movements. " I got a letter from Carl," she said casually. Michael paused with his hand ·over the large mushrooms, then continued to pile them into a plastic bag.

"What's up?"

"He and his wife are coming to New York, and they need a place to stay, ' ' she said noncommittally.

"What would you like to do about it?" he asked.

"I don 't know . I feel guilty turning them down. But then again , they can afford a motel-in fact , it's for a convention, so they probably don't really pay for it anyway," she said.

"What would you like to do?" he repeated.

"I think I'll write and tell him that they're welcome to come to dinner but that we simply don 't have enough room .

Which is true," she added for herself.

"Whatever you want," he said, moving on to the endives.

Jessie felt let down . She didn't know quite what she'd expected . If it had been Michael's first wife coming for a visit, Jessie would have been icy and indignant.

They carried the groceries home in silence. "How about a mushroom curry for dinner?" said Jessie.

"Actually, I thought I'd like to make you dinner. Let me cook for a change," he said. · They unpacked quickly. "What are you making?" she asked .

"My surprise. But it'll ·take a few hours, so I want you out . Now. C'mon, get out of here," he said, chasing her from the kitchen .

Jessie wandered into the bedroom and sat looking at the bills for ten minutes .

Then she pulled out an engraved note card left over from the wedding, ran her fingers over her new name, and wrote, "Dear Carl , Good to hear from you.

We're glad you'll be in New York, but unfortunately we have nowhere to put you and Ellie up. Hope you'll give us a call so that we can all have dinner. Take care. Jessie."

She heard nothing further from Carl.

He's pr.obably miffed, she thought, but Michael would be even more miffed if I'd said okay.

It was probably the first time in her entire life that she'd turned down a request for help, and it wasn't sitting well. Which is why she was almost relieved when Carl called two nights later

and hinted around for dinner. "I remember what a terrific cook you used to be with practically nothing! Remember the night we drove up to Earl's beach house in Maine? Jesus, it must've been the middle of March."

"Yes, and we got stopped at .three A.M . for speeding in a little hick town ."

"Yeah, but what really got the cop was that the inspection sticker had expired. I think he must've ignored the cloud of dope we'd been blowing." " You're not kidding! I was shaking! " "So then we got to Earl's," he continued, "and all the beds were taken, so we slept on the floor in front of the fire. And the next morning you found some canned vegetables and rice and cheese, and made the best meal out of it that any of us had ever had ."

She remembered that meal, too. It had been a sunny, crisp day, and after eating they had all smoked some joints and flown a kite on the beach, and Jessie had taken a long walk up the shore with Earl's girl Sara, picking up pretty broken shells and unusual rocks that never looked as special once she ' d gotten them home.

"I want you to come for dinner. I'd love to meet Ellie."

"Great! Can't wait," said Carl.

"See you on the twenty-third then," she said. "Good-by."

Chicken Proven<;ale? Veal piccata?

What should she make? she wondered.

She spent the next few evenings studying the cookbooks she'd collected since· her engagement. Michael made no comment; she'd told him to expect their company on the twenty-third, and he had seemed uninterested .

Cold salmon to start? Or maybe gazpacho? No, the weather wasn't right for that. Perhaps a Creole shrimp dish, considering Ellie's background . No, better not risk it. . . .

Finally she decided on an Indian meal: fragrant stuffed tomatoes, lamb in a braised garlic cream sauce (which could be made a day early), saffron pilaf with peaches, and glazed cauliflower with ginger. A little ambitious, but why not? Definitely better than her former vegetablerice-and-cheese concoctions.

She spent the next three evenings rummaging through her closet, looking for just the right outfit to · wear. The tight sweaters and slit skirts Carl had always asked her to wear had been given to Goodwill long ago. Michael preferred the button-down shirt and crew-neck sweater look on her; secretly she'd always preferred it, too, but Carl had always wanted her 1to look like his Vargas-girl drawing. Fir.ally she found a compromise in the back of her closet: a very expensive tailored royal-blue silk sheath she'd splurged on and had been saving. If only she didn't spill cream sauce down her chest.

OLD SPICE

[continued]

They were due in at Kennedy at 6:00 At 5:40 Carl called. "We're here early! Think you'd like to meet us out here?" he said.

"But I don't have a car," she said.

"Take a cab." " Too expensive! We'll catch the subway."

"Whatever you want." She hung up.

"I wonder if they're going to their motel first?" she said to Michael. "I told him dinner was at eight. I'll kill him if he ' s late."

"No, we'll just start without them," Michael said, cleaning dust off the record on the turntable . Ella Fitzgerald began to croon Cole Porter tunes.

At 7:45 the bell rang. Jessie opened the door: "We took the plane to the train," Carl said pompously. Jessie giggled and didn't know what to do with her hands. " C'm'ere," Carl said, giving her a bear hug . She had forgotten how well they did that together. Immediately she broke free. "Where's Ellie?" sne asked.

A gorgeous, tanned girl surrounded by luggage stood by the stairs. · ~ Hi," she said softly, and smiled. She had an enormous number of shiny teeth.

Like Burt Parks, Jessie thought, and also noted the luggage. · ·:come in, come in! Let me have your coats." She took their things, asked ~tbcmt the flight and didn't listen to the answer' and pointed out the bathroom to Ellie, who vanished into it quickly. Jessie and Carl faced each other; he looked her up and down. "You look good," he said, in a tone that made her shiver.

"She looks great," said Michael, who'd suddenly appeared. He spanned her small waist between his large, warm hands.

"Honey, this is Carl," said Jessie, feeling foolish . They shook hands. ' 'Have a good flight?" Michael asked. " You must be bushed. How about a drink?"

They moved into the living room, flll standing awkwardly; Michael poured ~ome Scotch for Carl and handed Jessie a glass of white wine. They stood siiently till Ellie appeared . . ''You must be Ellie, and I'll bet you're exhausted . What can I give yqu to drink?" Michael said.

"Whatever Carl's having," she said softly. He poured her some Scotch, and everyone ·sat around the lacquered Chinese coffee table.

"What beautiful furniture. lt'sjust like all those places we saw in the Orient,'' said Ellie . "Remember, honey?"

"Tell me about your trip! It sounds wonderful," said Jessie.

Carl began to relate six weeks' worth of adventures to them, waving his arms, snorting with laughter, shaking his head f'.M.

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in mock wonder. Michael refilled drinks; "Where did you ever learn to cook like Jessie excused herself to check on din- this? This is incredible!" said Carl. ner, and when she returned, Ellie had "Michael and I have been taking cookpulled out some knitting. "What are you ing courses at the New School. Actually, making, Ellie?" she asked. Michael, she he's a better cook than I am," Jessie noticed with relief, had assumed his said, squeezing her husband's hand.

"More wine, anyone?" Michael expansive host personality. ''I'm making an afghan. Our house is asked. Carl nodded vigorously. Ellie so chilly at night." giggled. " Carl says you're living at the beach.

"So what's this convention you're in How do you like it?" town for?'' Michael asked Carl.

"Oh, it's so pretty," she said in a soft, "It's the computer show at the Colisecooing way, then giggled. "Carl has um. I'm here to look at the competition. some friends who are making us furni- From my point of view, though, I'm here ture, since the cc!tts scratched up all the to do some heavy connecting."

"And what will Ellie be doing?" Jesold pieces my daddy gave us from his summer place in the mountains." sie said.

"Where are you from?"

"I guess I'll go with him, too?'' said "Nashville. And we have such a sweet Ellie. "Or maybe I'll shop? I don't really little cabin in the ..mountains, where we know anyone in New York." used to go every slimmer when I was a "Ellie, you'll be bored to death with little girl, right up until the time I went me!" Carl said. "Why don't you hang away to school. And then I met Carl,'' out with Jessie?" she said, and laughed.

"I could take a few days off-maybe I "Uh-huh," said Jessie. could show you around the city," Jessie ''And Jessie, you just wouldn't believe .said quickly, then instantly regretted it. what an old sweetie he is. He just swept "Oh, that's so nice of you! Carl, isn't me off my feet. Our first date, he bor- that sweet? She's just as nice as all get rowed this funny 9ld car and packed us out, just like you said." the funniest picnic lunch-peanutJessie rolled her eyes at Michael, butter-and-chocolate sandwiches and who was biting his lower lip to keep from passion-fruit punch! Can you imagine? grinning. Carl was watching Jessie exAnd we drove down to Cape Cod and pressively.

Carl set off rockets! And then after we In fact, Jessie noticed, Carl continued watched the sun set, we sat on the beach to look at her. He looked at the way she and talked and talked and watched the chewed her food; he noticed every look moon come up. I'll never forget it; it was between her and Michael; he loudly the most romantic thing .... " admired her cooking and her witticisms; Perfect settings were Carl's forte, he seemed to observe how the high thought Jessie. "Excuse me," she said. curves of her breasts moved against "I think dinner is about ready." the blue silk; and when she leaned They sat down at the table. "Oh, Jes- past him to remove the salt and pepsie, this looks so sweet," said Ellie. per shakers, she sensed his breathing Carl fingered the batik-print table- her perfume, and he reached secretly cloth. "It looks like the bedspread you to caress her thigh, but she was too used to have," he said. · quick for him.

Jessie looked at him. "It is," she Jessie flushed. "Let's have dessert said. "You know I'm versatile with and coffee in the living room," she sugmy things." gested. So they picked up their half-empShe lit the candles and served the fra- ty wine glasses and moved inside, where grant stuffed tomatoes. "This is wonder- Jessie brought out a glazed apple tart. ful!" said Carl. "This is really great!

"You didn't make this, too, honey?"

You're a better cook than ever." said Ellie.

"Very good," Michael said quietly, "No, I didn't have time, because we and she looked pleased. were too busy at the clinic yesterday , so They all ate silently.

Michael picked it up at a place called "I bring Carl breakfast in bed every DeWees La Cote Basque." morning," said Ellie. "Don't I, honey?

"What do you do, Michael?" Ellie Just the way he likes it. But we always asked. get crumbs in the bed afterward," she "At the moment I teach English litsaid, and laughed. "Don't we, sweet- erature to resistant freshmen," he heart?" answered.

"Yeah," said Carl, looking at Jessie, "Oh, I love reading," she said. "Don't who suddenly began clearing the dishes. you, Jessie? What have you read lately She returned with the platter of lamb. that's good?"

"That smells fabulous," said Carl, Jessie la~ghed self-consciously. "I reaching for it. "Let me help you." don't think you'd like what I read. I have "Michael, would you get the rice?" strange interests. Right now, for inJessie said. Michael carried in a golden stance, I'm reading a book on the history saffron pilaf decorated with plump of childbirth in America." peaches, then returned with a platter of "Oh, I read a novel like that. It vegetables. was called Midwife." Ellie's voice

Olb SPICE [continued]

deepened. "I just love babies. My sister has three already, and she's only two years older."

"Yeah, but she looks at least ten years older," said Carl. "What do you want to go and ruin that great body for?"

"You think?" Ellie said tentatively.

They sipped their espresso.

"Michael, how about some music?" said Jessie.

"How about Pink Floyd?" Carl said.

"Haven't got any," said Michael.

"Any other suggestions?"

No one answered, so he put on Bolero.

"I saw that movie!" said Ellie. "Ten. Bo Derek. Right, Carl?"

"You're my Bo Derek," said Carl, squeezing her.

"Oh honey," she said, laughing, "cut it out. I want to work on my afghan."

She pulled out the ball of pink yarn again.

"An after-dinner drink?" said Michael.

"You wannabe decadent?" said Carl, and grinned.

"Honey, you're so bad!" Ellie looked reproachful.

Carl reached for his satchel, pulled out an envelope filled with white powder, put it back, then produced an ounce of marijuana.

"Sinsemilla. Seedless. Packed with THC. I grow my own." He took a sheet of Bambu and rolled a joint, and Jessie suddenly remembered the time he'd dropped ashes from a joint on her naked chest. He struck a match to it; she breathed in the smell of countless halfremembered nights, floating in the warm, rocking safety of a moonlit waterbed, making love that lasted for a stoned eternity. She stretched out her hand to take the joint Carl offered, an automatic reflex. Michael watched. She drew back.

"No thanks," she said. Ellie began to hum quietly.

Carl breathed deeply, drawing pungent smoke into his powerful lungs. He could outsmoke anyone, Jessie remembered, especially his drug clients. She reineinbered helping him weigh ounces out of a Hefty trash bag full of grass.

"You know," remarked Carl, "when I look at you, I see 1972.

"And when I look at you," he said to Ellie, "I see 1982. Isn't it strange?"

"Where are you staying?" asked Jessie.

"Howard Johnson's."

"Maybe you should check to see that they're still holding your room." ''I told them I'd be late."

"Did you ask for guaranteed late arrival?" , "What's that?" he said.

"Honey, maybe I'd better call," said Ellie.

310

"Sure, why not?" he said.

"Let me show you the phone," said Jessie. She took Ellie into the bedroom.

Ellie sat on the bed. "Oh, down! I love down quilts. That's what we used to have up in our mountain cabin."

"You miss it, don't you?"

"Sure do! No one ever told me how wet and cold California could be," said Ellie.

"Is he good to you?" Jessie said imploring! y.

"Oh sure. Most of the time ... sometimes .... '' ''Sometimes?''

"Sometimes I feel like I can't get hold of him. I reach and reach and can't find hiin. But he expects so much-he wants so much-he wants to make love all the time," .she confided. "I can't keep up with him. And he wants to do such scary things-he's takinghang-gliding lessons, and he wants us to hop freight trains and travel in Canada, and I don't understand a lot of his friends-they're so different from the folks I knew back home. But Carl says he likes all the differences between us..,-he's a lot older-he says he has so much to teach me. He calls himself 'Sven-golly' or something like that, and he says he sees inside my heart, and most times I think maybe he does."

"Here's the phone book," said Jessie, and left.

Ellie returned a few minutes later. Her blue eyes looked shiny-wet. "They said because we didn't call by ten they couldn't hold the room any more," she said. "What'll we all do?"

"We can't afford a rt<al hotel," said Carl.

Everyone was silent. . ''You can use the couch for the night,'' Michael said finally. ''I'm sure they'll be able to find you a room tomorrow."

"I'm so sorry," said Ellie, her voice quivering .

He planned it this way, thought Jessie.

She knew it. She changed the subject by asking about California. The conversation ranged from the problem with Medfly to Tibetan cuisine and astral projection, and from there to Social Security, the New Right, high-s.chool iliiteracy. ''I'm bushed," said Michael. "Time to turn in. Jessie?"

"I just want to clean up the dishes," she said.

"I'll take care of it in the morning," he said.

"No, that's okay. I'm worried about roaches." 路 "Okay. I'll get some blankets and towels.''

"Let me help," said Ellie. She followed Michael out to the linen closet, as Jessie began carrying espresso cups and sticky plates into the kitchen. Carl picked up his own dishes and followed her. She filled up the sink }Vith suds,

working quickly. Down the hall, she heard Ellie and Michael laughing.

"What do you think?" said Carl.

"Of what?" 路 "Ellie."

"She's lovely. In fact, she's beautiful, and she's crazy about you."

"Yeah," he said.

"So what's the problem?"

"I don't know," he said, absently playing with the plastic fruit magnets on the refrigerator. "Sometimes I'm a little-bored? You know. She just runs on and on ... and I realize I'm not really listening. Not like you."

Jessie started to scrub the platter vigorously.

"It's not like it was with us. You know, that-that affinity we always had-it used to be psychic." He moved closer. Jessie smelled Old Spice, and something in her stomach fluttered.

"Give it time. She's young."

"I don't know if I can-if I want to give it time. God, there are so many women out there-and each one is a whole new experience-! just want it all. ... " "Ellie tells me you ' re hang-gliding."

He toyed with the magnets, watching them attract, then switching them around so they repelled. ''Remember the time we went gliding?" he said. "First we ate your picnic lunch from Zabar's, then we each took lessons. Where was that, Wurtsboro? You were great. A pro. See, that's what I mean. Ellie would never do thai.''

"All I remember is that I threw up my lunch right after," said Jessie.

"But that's not the point. At least you tried. You're always ready to try something at least once." He was standing directly behind her now. Slowly, he caressed her sides. Jessie trembled but did not move; she was up to her forearms in soapy water. "Remember?" he breathed in her ear, nuzzling her neck gently. "Remember how good we used to be?" He pressed against her, making insinuating little movements against her back. She turned abruptly, soapsuds splashing him.

"I remember," she said quietly. He leaned over, and flicked his tongue in her ear. She shuddered and pushed him aside. "And what's supposed to happen now?" she asked . "A quick one on the floor, with my husband and your wife about to walk in?"

"Jessie, don't be crude. You know how I feel about you." His eyes were glazed.

"I don't 1 want to know," she said.

"Not any more. Look, you're staying here tonigHt. You got that much. But don't think you're getting away with anything, okay? You can stay tonight, but I want you out tomorrow. Okay?" And she left him covered with Ivory suds. [continued on 336]

OLD SPICE [continued from 310]

Later, on her way out of the bathroom, she passed a forlorn-looking Ellie.

"Do you have everything you need?" she asked.

"Uh-huh. " " Good night, then ."

"Jessie ?" " Yeah?" " Thanks for everything. Did you really mean it about showing me around New

York tomorrow? I'm afraid of being alone here."

"Sure I did . We'll have lots of fun tomorrow .'' " We'll only be here tonight. I'm really sorry-" "No problem. Forget it ," Jessie said .

"See you tomorrow . Sleep well."

She closed the door to her bedroom.

"At last," Michael whispered , sotto voce , pulling her into his arms .

She laughed with relief and desire . " Ready for bed?" he asked.

She snuggled against him. " What do you think of them? " she asked .

"Loved her, hated him ?" he suggested. She pushed him . "He's about what I expected."

Me, too, she thought. " Michael, let' s ruin my figure," she said. "Let's make babies . I want to gorge myself on chocolates for the next nine months, and no one will be able to see the difference ."

"You can't ruin it ," he said. " Not for me . Don 't you realize that yet?"

"I think I'm starting to ," she said . ~