Issue 20 Week 12 Sem 121
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Scope is proudly brought to you by BUSA and a dedicated group of student volunteers. Scope: By STUDENTS for STUDENTS
PUBLICATIONS DIRECTOR EDITOR IN CHIEF GRAPHIC DESIGNER Jorja-Lee Wallace FEATURES EDITOR | Shannan Carroll SUB-EDITOR | Bonnie Whitehead SUB-EDITOR | Kyle Manning MUSIC, ARTS & REVIEWS EDITOR | Emily McGregor SUB-EDITOR | Jonathan Dodd SPORT EDITOR | Rebecca Thompson SUB-EDITOR | Linda Woelk PHOTOGRAPHERS Shaun Rotman Zaki Armen Jorja Wallace Caroline Kovac Stuart McKelvie Liam Byrne SPONSORSHIP Michael ‘Papa’ Penklis
DEADLINES Space Reservation: Sunday 4pm Completed content: Monday 4pm
CONTACT Editor: jorja-lee.wallace@student. bond.edu.au General: scope.bond@gmail. com Phone: (07) 5595 4009
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8. contents 3. Weekly BUSA Report 4. Alumni Student Excellence Medals: Winning Essay 6. Challenge Accepted 7. Australian in Character, Yet International in Perspective 8. Surviving the Trimester 9. GAMSAT 10. Examine Your Eating
During Exam Time 11. Executive Drinks 121 12. Photos 18. Music, Arts & Reviews 20. Sport 22. Extra, Extra, Read All About Extravaganza 23. Your Guide to Table Manners - For Hosts and Guests! 24. San Cisco Interview 26. Posters
COVER PHOTO: Shaun Rotman
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The views and opinions expressed in Scope do not necessarily represent those of the Scope team, the Publications Director or BUSA.
facebook.com/scope.bond bondstudents.com
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FROM THE DESK OF: MATTHEW MCLEAN Alumni Student Excellence Medals I am pleased to announce the first round of winners for the 2012 Alumni Student Excellence Medal’s. Those receiving medals in the first semester essay competition are: • 1st Place – Thomas Harrison: Australia Should Remain A Country That Makes Things No Matter the Cost. Agree or Disagree. • 2nd Place – Katherine Sarna-Wetton: Invention and Innovation in the 21st Century Has Gone Too Far. • 3rd Place – Tania Bolam: What is the Meaning of Life?
editor’s report
We saw a record number of registrations to kick-start this year’s Alumni Student Excellence Medals.
Sadly, it’s the end of another semester of Scope. With exams on the horizon, we will be joining the masses in the race to the end of the semester; and hopefully, a successful and favourable report card. This semester has been interesting to say the least, with articles on a wide variety of topics.
Congratulations to all who entered, those short-listed and of course our winners. Turn the page to see Thomas Harrison’s outstanding piece examing the current state of manufacturing in Australia, our failure to manufacture a comparative advantage and the need for investment in our contemporary economy. My thanks to Jorja-Lee Wallace, Madeline Wardleworth, Marcus de Courtenay and Thinesh Thillai for joining me on the short-listing committee. Our appreciation to Henry Norris, Professor Raoul Mortley and alumnus Rob Layton for judging the final entries.
Undoubtedly the underlying theme of submissions for 121 seems to have been tolerance. Tolerance for our choices, tolerance for our actions, tolerance for our beliefs and tolerance for, at times, controversial opinions.
The Alumni Student Excellence Medals could not be possible without the support of the Bond University Alumni Relations Office, the Office of Development and the generous contributions of alumni throughout the 2011 Annual Fund.
This week is no exception, with a banquet of topics to break up your exam study. Get comfy, grab your energy drink of choice and enjoy.
Watch this space for news on the next chapter of Alumni Student Excellence Medals in Semester 122.
We’ve seen the rise of Bond University Memes, countless BBQs and parties, a couple of handovers and heated debates on SAM. Labor fell from power in Queensland, civil partnership was embodied in Queensland legislation, and the Bond Lake flooded, again.
Multimedia Learning Centre Opening Hours As a result of BUSA’s Teaching with Technology position paper the Vice-Chancellor has commissioned Information Services to trial 24-7 opening hours at the Balnave’s Multimedia Learning Centre. For the duration of Week 13 and 14 the MLC will be accessible to students all day and all night. Students will be required to swipe for access during certain hours.
Yes, it’s April already and that means we’re eight months away from ‘the end of the world’. Start preparing, collect your favourite editions of Scope and if you feel so inclined, whip up witty and thought-provoking submissions for Scope 122 in your, short, but well-deserved break.
Education Quarter: January 1 – March 30 The latest edition of the Education Quarter is now available to students. This, the second quarter report of the current BUSA term is an important mechanism through which students can see the educational feedback provided on their behalf.
To those of you who are leaving us - good luck for your future endeavours. We hope your student experience has been memorable, and we encourage you to stay in touch with the Scope team. To those of you who remain - we will see you for another semester full of debauchery, hard work and Scopetastic fun (undoubtedly more-so thanks to SAM).
Numerous recommendations have been made this quarter to Academic Senate, its various Committees and the Senior Management Group. To access the latest and all previous Education Quarters please visit the Education Gateway on BondSync.
Good luck to all for final assessment, and we look forward to seeing your smiling faces next semester. Until next time, xx
E-Tevals E-Tevals remain open. Please take the time to contribute feedback anonymously and make your voice heard. An I-Pad 2 among other prizes is up for grabs to those who complete their E-Tevals online at Ilearn.
JW
Jorja Wallace
The Academic Audit The Academic Audit has begun in earnest. On behalf of the Education and Academic Affairs Council I am pleased to report that a draft report into all matters of education and academic affairs at Bond University is underway.
the Edm?itor o t s r e t t Le Scope tea Feedback for the .edu.au
Currently discussions have taken place at a BUSA and FSA level, students can expect to see a wide-ranging all-student survey early in Semester 121.
to say? student.bond Have something ja-lee.wallace@ the Editor at jor to ter let a nd Se nday | DUE: 4pm Mo Max 100 words
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Australia should remain a country that makes Australia should remain a country that makes things, but cannot make things no matter the cost. Australian political leaders have pledged that Australia should continue to make things when discussing manufacturing.1 This essay defines manufacturing as the production of goods by manual labour or machinery,2 which is separate from initial research and development. This essay will establish that Australia already spends too much money to prop up manufacturing firms that would likely fail without government assistance, and that those manufacturers that continue to make things should rely on having a comparative advantage that is determined by market forces. Further, this essay will identify Australian industries that would benefit if economic resources currently being used to subsidise manufacturing were allocated more efficiently. The current state of Australian manufacturing The manufacturing industry accounts for 8% of Australia’s GDP and total employment.3 It is diverse, ranging from processing food to refining raw metals to producing motor vehicles.4 However, manufacturing is shrinking within the Australian economy.5 For example, 53,800 manufacturing jobs were lost in the first eight months of 2011.6 This continues a longer trend of falling employment and relative output in manufacturing that is not solely caused by this decade’s mining boom.7 The Reserve Bank finds that the decline has been caused by structural changes such as greater consumer demand for services, competition from East Asian producers like China, reduced import tariffs on goods, and technological change.8 Further pressure has been applied recently by the high value of the Australian dollar.9 Manufacturing job losses come despite huge levels of government spending that suggest a ‘no matter the cost’ mindset is deeply entrenched. The manufacturing sector received 23% ($1.8 billion) of the $9.3 billion in 2009-10 federal government assistance paid to industry.10 The effective rate of assistance provided to manufacturing has remained largely unchanged since the late 1990s.11 The highest effective rates of assistance went to two manufacturing industry groupings: Textiles, clothing, footwear & leather and Motor vehicles & parts.12 These groupings receive the greatest share of the government’s industry assistance money, presumably because they are the most likely to fail without it. Regrettably, as Productivity Commission chairman Gary Banks states, large job losses in these groupings illustrate the ineffectiveness of using industry assistance for job creation purposes.13 Australian governments appear determined to fight market forces and save manufacturing jobs at any cost. Prime Minister Gillard believes that Australia does not want to “choose between a strong future for manufacturing and a strong economy as a whole”.14 However, many existing jobs in manufacturing are preserved through government assistance, and will only remain if even more assistance is forthcoming. This spending is unsustainable, as the economic forces squeezing parts of the Australian manufacturing sector will not retreat, and other sectors are demanding capital and labour. In 2011, Steve Jobs bluntly told President Obama that Apple’s manufacturing jobs weren’t coming back to America from China.15 Australian politicians need to hear a similar message about the fate of uncompetitive areas like automotive and clothing manufacturing, which would likely cease to exist without government help. This is not the economic equivalent of waving a
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white flag of surrender. Gary Banks notes that the relative decline of manufacturing “has been integral to the marked increase in the living standards of Australians”.16 As manufacturing’s relative share of GDP has fallen, Australia’s GDP per capita has risen.17 Economists Judith Sloan and Christina Romer agree that there is “nothing special about manufacturing” in terms of achieving higher living standards that justifies special treatment, and it is better to let markets determine areas of economic strength.18 Australia’s automotive manufacturing industry provides the leading example of the failure of government decisions to spend ever more money to save uncompetitive producers. The industry received over $700 million in assistance in 2009-10,19 as part of the Labor government’s promise of $6.2 billion in assistance between 2008 and 2021.20 However, Australian-produced cars are not popular with consumers, and their domestic sales fell by 3% in 2011 (more than the overall decrease in vehicle sales).21 These cars lost money every year from 2005 to 2008, and the future of Australian production depends on decisions made by multinational companies that would likely go elsewhere if government assistance was removed.22 Toyota may close down Australia production by 2017 and consolidate operations overseas.23 Economist Judith Sloan argues that with assistance totalling $160,000 per automotive worker per year, or $7000 per car produced, it is no longer worthwhile for Australia to prop up the industry.24 Ending subsidies for Australian car manufacturers is not a radical proposal, and would provide the best outcome for the economy as a whole. Productivity Commission research found that reducing assistance to the automotive industry would generate net benefits for Australia through improved usage of resources, and an increase in real GDP.25 New Zealand provides one empirical example to support this: automotive manufacturing ceased there in 1998, and cars (particularly used) can be bought more cheaply than in Australia.26 Protecting Australia’s automotive sector will require levels of protection to rise further (to the greater detriment of consumers) if existing manufacturing jobs are to be saved. This approach should be rejected. Australia cannot manufacture comparative advantage Australia should not attempt to preserve manufacturing no matter the cost. A government that offers subsidies to benefit one export industry (as Australia is doing for automotive and other manufacturing groups) hurts its own economy overall by imposing a net cost.27 Economist Saul Eslake argues that government should only help the Australian manufacturing sector to improve labour productivity, and not expand subsidies, impose import tariffs, or intervene in monetary policy, which all impose costs on consumers and the broader economy.28 Further, providing subsidies offers no guarantee that Australian manufacturers will remain in operation. Despite receiving over $4.5 billion in energy subsidies from government,29 Alcoa may cease aluminium production in Victoria after failing to develop world-leading smelters that deserve ongoing investment.30 The position is clear: seeking to prop up any and all manufacturers is harmful to Australia’s economy, and does not guarantee that corporate welfare recipients will subsequently thrive. Australia should not make things no matter the cost, but should instead focus on areas of manufacturing with a comparative advantage that can generate sustainable exports and employment; that is, where the opportunity cost of Australia
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s things, no matter the cost. Agree or disagree. Thomas Harrison
manufacturing a good in terms of other goods is lower than in other countries.31 Economics writer Ross Gittins correctly states that Australian manufacturing should ‘stand on its own feet’ without government protection, and competitive producers will continue to make things, although they may represent a smaller share of GDP and employment.32 By ending protection of manufacturing, Australia’s money may be applied for better economic outcomes.
government assistance, and it could develop further by absorbing skilled manufacturing workers. Over the long term, money can be allocated toward growth areas. Technology entrepreneur Marc Andreessen expects software to reshape most industries in the future,37 and Australia must seek to compete in this space. Science writer Julian Cribb envisions Australia in 2050 as a major exporter in areas of technology for climate adaptation, clean energy, food and health products.38 To achieve this knowledge-based economy, Australia will need to invest significantly in education, basic research, and IT infrastructure like the National Broadband Network. This would surely be a better way to spend $700 million a year than subsidising three car manufacturers.
Investing in Australia’s future economy Australia is currently blessed with educated workers, mineral wealth, and natural landscapes. It is short sighted (and usually politically motivated) to say that all existing manufacturing activity must be preserved through government spending. Australia’s resources should instead be directed towards economic activity where the country has a comparative advantage.
Conclusion
At present, one better destination for these resources is in Australian mining, which is booming due to Chinese and Indian demand. Economist Henry Ergas argues that labour and capital should be reallocated to more productive mining activities, by stopping government assistance to Australian manufacturers (such as car producers) that would likely fail otherwise.33 For example, Australia’s mining technology services and equipment sector has developed and manufactured high-value mining equipment, and accounted for 70% of global sales ($8.7 billion) in 2008-09.34 Mining also results in significant engineering research,35 making Philip Toner’s justification for subsiding automotive manufacturing redundant.36 This sector thrives without
Australia should end the billions of dollars in assistance to manufacturing firms. Australia will continue to make things, but it should do so only where a comparative advantage exists. This will produce better outcomes for the national economy. In the immediate term, the government should focus on improving labour productivity, and the shift of capital and labour away from inefficient subsidised manufacturers will likely benefit the booming mining sector. Over the long term, the government can spend money more wisely to provide the foundations for technology and knowledge-based industries. Seeking to prop up parts of the manufacturing sector comes at an unreasonable cost in dollar terms and also in terms of the lost opportunity
REFERENCES 1. Julia Gillard, Manufacturing’s Crucial Role in our Economy (20 September 2011) Prime Minister of Australia <http://www.pm.gov.au>; Tony Abbott, Leader of the Opposition Address to Worker at Repco Ingleburn Distribution Centre (9 September 2011) Liberal Party of Australia <http://www.liberal.org.au>. 2. Arthur Delbridge (ed), The Macquarie Dictionary (Macquarie Library, 3rd ed, 1997) 1313. 3. Department of Industry, Innovation, Science, Research and Tertiary Education, Manufacturing Data Card (December 2011) <http://www.innovation.gov.au>. 4. Ibid. 5. Ellis Connolly and Christine Lewis, ‘Structural Change in the Australian Economy’ (September 2010) Reserve Bank of Australia Bulletin, 1 <http://www.rba.gov.au/ publications/bulletin/2010/sep/pdf/bu-0910.pdf>. 6. Peter Martin, ‘The Working Class At Your Service’, The Age (online), 16 September 2011 <http://www.theage.com.au>. 7. David Gruen, ‘The Resources Boom and Structural Change in the Australian Economy’ in Australian Treasury, Economic Roundup (2011) 123, 130 <http://www. treasury.gov.au/documents/2130/PDF/Economic_Roundup_Consolidated.pdf>. 8. Connolly and Lewis, above n 5, 6-8. 9. Michael Stutchbury, ‘Steel Manufacturing Bust is the Flipside of our Chinese Mining Wealth’, The Australian (online), 27 August 2011 <http://www.theaustralian. com.au>. 10. Productivity Commission, Trade and Assistance Review 2009-10 (16 June 2011) 15, 33-4 <http://www.pc.gov.au/annual-reports/trade-assistance/tar0910>. 11. Ibid 22. 12. Ibid 20. 13. Gary Banks, ‘Australia’s Mining Boom: What’s the Problem?’ (Speech delivered at the Melbourne Institute, 30 June 2011) 4 <http://www.pc.gov.au>. 14. Julia Gillard, ‘Building a New Australian Economy Together’ (Speech delivered at the Australia-Israel Chamber of Commerce Lunch, Melbourne, 1 February 2012) <http://www.pm.gov.au>. 15. Charles Duhigg and Keith Bradsher, ‘How the U.S. Lost Out on iPhone Work’, The New York Times (online), 21 January 2012 <http://www.nytimes.com>. 16. Banks, above n 13, 12. 17. Gary Banks, Australia’s Mining Boom: What’s the Problem? (Presentation slides), 30 June 2011, Melbourne Institute, 15 <http://melbourneinstitute.com/downloads/ conferences/conferences_outlook%202011/2_Banks,%20Gary.pdf>. 18. Judith Sloan, There’s Nothing Special About Manufacturing (14 November 2011) ABC Online <http://www.abc.net.au>; Christina D. Romer, ‘Do Manufacturers Need Special Treatment?’, The New York Times (online), 4 February 2012 <http:// www.nytimes.com>. 19. Productivity Commission, above n 10, 15. 20. Department of Innovation, Industry, Science & Research, A New Car Plan for a Greener Future (2008) 3 <http://www.innovation.gov.au>. 21. Myriam Robin, Car Parts Makers Worried as Local Vehicle Sales Sag (6 January
2012) Smart Company <http://www.smartcompany.com.au>. 22. Chris F. Wright, Stiphen Clibborn and Russell D. Lansbury, ‘Becoming an Endangered Species? The Future Viability of Australian Automotive Manufacturing’ (2011) 11(2) International Journal of Automotive Technology and Management 172, 1789, 186. 23. Tim Beissmann, Car Industry Central to Australia’s Manufacturing Future: Carr (24 January 2012) Car Advice <http://www.caradvice.com.au>. 24. Judith Sloan, ‘Nothing New or Green About Rust-bucket Industries’, The Australian (online), 14 February 2012 <http://www.theaustralian.com.au>. 25. Productivity Commission, Modelling Economy-wide Effects of Future Automotive Assistance (May 2008) 49, 80 <http://www.pc.gov.au>. 26. Bernard Lagan, Car Makers: Beached As (9 February 2012) The Global Mail <http://www.theglobalmail.org/feature/car-makers-beached-as/44/>. 27. Paul Krugman and Maurice Obstfeld, International Economics: Theory & Policy (Pearson Addison-Wesley, 8th ed, 2009) 105, 192-3. 28. Saul Eslake, Give and Take: a Prosperous Australia for a Declining Manufacturing Industry? (30 September 2011) Online Opinion <http://www.onlineopinion.com. au>. 29. Royce Millar, Ben Schneiders and Adam Morton, ‘Alcoa Deal Locks in Jobs – and Emissions’, The Sydney Morning Herald (online), 2 March 2010 <http://www. smh.com.au>. 30. Matthew Wright, Alcoa: Seeing Through the Carbon Tax Doomsday Predictions (14 February 2012) ABC Online <http://www.abc.net.au>. 31. Krugman and Obstfeld, above n 27, 31. 32. Tony Malkovic, Making It In a Global Economy (22 December 2011) The Institute of Chartered Accountants in Australia <http://www.charteredaccountants.com. au>. 33. Henry Ergas, ‘Direct Support to Those Industries with a Future’, The Australian (online), 6 February 2012 <http://www.theaustralian.com.au>. 34. Leanna Tedesco and Chloe Haseltine, An Economic Survey of Companies in the Australian Mining Technology Services and Equipment Sector, 2006-07 to 2008-09 (July 2010) Australian Bureau of Agricultural and Resource Economics, 31 <http://adl.brs.gov.au>. 35. Brian S. Fisher and Sabine Schnittger, Autonomous and Remote Operation Technologies in the Mining Industry (February 2012) BAEconomics, 37-8 <http://www. baeconomics.com.au>. 36. Phillip Toner, It’s Technology, Stupid: Manufacturing’s Crucial Role in our Economy (3 February 2012) The Conversation <http://theconversation.edu.au/its-technology-stupid-manufacturings-crucial-role-in-our-economy-5137>. 37. Marc Andreessen, ‘Why Software is Eating the World’, The Wall Street Journal (online), 20 August 2011 <http://online.wsj.com>. 38. Julian Cribb, Australia in 2050 (5 September 2011) ECOS Magazine <http:// www.ecosmagazine.com/view/journals/ECOS_Print_Fulltext.cfm?f=EC11027>.
This essay has been published in its original form.
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Challenge Accepted. James M.
“What the f**k. Why didn’t I start this, like, 3 weeks ago?” Excuse the crude language, but this is exactly what I thought to myself as I submitted an assignment at 11.58pm last Friday night – a whole sixty seconds before it was due. Do I regret leaving it to the very last minute? Not really… and for this there are multiple reasons.
then, you would hardly know anything about the subject. However, the longer you leave it, the more you can draw upon and make reference to the accumulation of knowledge you have gained from the many lectures and tutorials you (should have) attended over the semester. Come Weeks 10/11/12 and you’re ready as can be to tackle that seemingly impossible essay.
The first is that you work so much better under pressure and become a whole lot more resourceful. Think about it, when you’ve got plenty of time left to do something, what do you do? You procrastinate, wasting hours of your day doing pointless things – watching TV shows you don’t even like that much, scrolling through your newsfeed for the hundredth time, eating for the sake of it… the list goes on. However, when you know you’ve got x amount of hours until your assignment is due, you kick yourself into action and get the bloody thing done.
What we don’t realise is that we already work under this kind of pressure all the time and, quite often, it works out well for us.
What we don’t realise is that we already work under this kind of pressure all the time and, quite often, it works out well for us. Although the context is a bit different, a picture on the Bond University Memes page (clearly I’ve done my secondary research) says it perfectly: Lecturer: “You can’t write an essay the day before it’s due… This exam has an essay question – you have one hour.” When you’re a bit behind schedule in an exam and there’s only one hour remaining, you don’t throw your pen on the ground and storm out of the sports hall. Instead, you take advantage of your anxiety and make the most of every minute left. You have learnt how to embrace this negative situation and know how to make it work for you - it should be no different when you’re writing a last minute assignment. To sum up my ‘argument’ is a page on Facebook called, “I leave my assignments to the last minute because I will be older, and therefore, wiser.” Despite the fact that anyone who has taken Reasoning Skills is probably screaming “FALLACY!!!” right now (myself included), I think it’s actually pretty logical. Say for example you are given an assignment in Week 3. If you did it there and
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Okay, so maybe in reality I am just trying to make myself feel better about the whole 11.58pm situation… But please, don’t get me wrong. I really truly appreciate my education and am strongly opposed to the whole “Ps Get Degrees” mentality, simply because we are all capable of achieving so much more than just a pass. So I guess what I’m ultimately trying to get at here is that while you shouldn’t leave every assignment to the last minute, sometimes life gets in the way and all you can do is smile and accept the challenge it presents you. 5 Tips to Manage those Last Minute Assignments: 1. First and foremost, trust in your abilities. University isn’t the easiest thing in world – you’ve done well so far! 2. Get real – don’t underestimate how much time it will take to complete the task. 3. Segment the assignment into workable, digestible pieces. 4. Have a short break every now and then - even though you’re working to a tight deadline, trust me, you need it to ensure the bullshit you’re producing is as relevant as possible. 5. Last but not least, imagine how good you will feel when it’s all over and use this to motivate yourself. Disclaimer: Author is a Communication (Business) student.
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Australian in Character, Yet International in Perspective Aisha Ismail Two weeks ago, an article was published in Scope by a student expressing their disappointment over Bond University’s, and, more specifically, BUSA’s attitude towards secularism. The primary example used in the article was that BUSA allowed the Muslim Student Association (MSA) to host Wednesday by the Water and, in doing so, effectively provided the MSA with a platform to impose their religious beliefs on Bond students.
The writer of the article expressed two views that appear to contradict each other. He says he was (quote) “genuinely shocked, admittedly disappointed and offended” by the event hosted by the MSA. And yet, he (quote) “cannot stress enough the importance for our students to be involved and active in our religions if that is what we want”. The writer also expressed his concern over this event, as he believed that BUSA should remain religiously impartial. However, I believe that by allowing the MSA to host Wednesday by the Water, BUSA was doing no more than allowing the society a platform to spread their beliefs and was neither supporting nor opposing the beliefs of the MSA.
I also think there is a very significant difference bet ween sharing your beliefs and practices and imposing them on others. Imposition would entail that a person is forced to act in a certain way
I also think there is a very significant difference between sharing your beliefs and practices, and imposing them on others. Imposition would entail that a person is forced to act in a certain way. In my experience, I have never been forced into doing anything by any religious group at Bond, but merely encouraged to take part in an expression of their beliefs and culture. The writer of the article expressed particular concern at having to take part in religious practices that included being divided into male and female serving lines and being served halal food. While I acknowledge that these are Islamic customs, I also think that there are many religious customs that have been incorporated into everyday life. For example, would you consider supermarkets selling Easter eggs an imposition of Christian values? Judging by the amount of people that buy chocolate Easter eggs, I would assume not. My point is that the MSA was hardly imposing their practices on anyone, merely peacefully inviting people to partake in them and if people chose not to, then that was completely within their discretion.
To begin with, I’d like to say that I completely agree with the notion that everyone has the right to decide on their own religious beliefs and no one should have these beliefs forced upon them. However, I fail to see how a religious society hosting a weekly event equates to an imposition of religious practices on Bond students. Conversely, I would argue that as a university that prides itself on its international outlook and diverse student body, Bond should be encouraging students to share their cultures, backgrounds and religions. Having been at Bond for over a year, I have grown to truly value and appreciate the way that different cultural and religious clubs actively participate in student life. Their involvement has exposed me to a variety of values, practices and beliefs that I would otherwise have been unaware of, and demonstrates the Australian values of acceptance, tolerance and multiculturalism. We are fortunate enough to live in a country that celebrates diversity and encourages people to share their beliefs without fear of persecution and this is an aspect of Australian culture that should be embraced.
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In my opinion, both BUSA and the MSA should be congratulated for creating platforms for the spread of different cultures and religions in a peaceful, non-imposing way. For my part, I would like to sincerely thank other societies, such as Bond Christian Connection, who take the time to prepare lolly bags and prayers for all on-campus students during exam week, because God knows that I need all the prayers I can get when it comes to exams.
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SURVIVING THE T RIMESTER
Bonnie Whitehead
Week 12: it rings with a mixture of end of semester joy and holyshit-exams-are-in-two-weeks. No matter how much you’re freaking out and preparing for all those teary, sleepless nights in the Bat Labs to come; enjoy the melodious choruses of “this will be our last lecture for the semester”, and the knowledge that you’ve just survived over three months at Bond, without a break.
FSA’s token attempt to act like they do anything, or another drunken night that has called for a ‘recovery sesh’ with food just as questionable as what went down the night before; expect without fail to get hit with a free sausage. In fact, don’t be surprised to find BBQs quickly becoming synonymous with anything mildly significant happening within campus life.
Whether you’re in your first semester or your last, I’m sure you’ve found there are certain practices within the Bond community that you’ve found yourself adopting over this three month period. These are, in essence, some of the quintessential ideas surrounding that phrase “to be a Bondie”. Some of these things I quite detest, and others (my friends will assure you) I take on a little too enthusiastically (I like to keep my Thursday nights consistent). Love them or hate them, they seem to come with the territory, so I thought I’d give a few a shout out just to celebrate the past three months we’ve all shared with them.
Personally, I’ve never quite recovered from my initial trauma of the Sunday night O-Week ‘Welcome BBQ’ a year or so back. True to my rookie fresher form, I managed to drop a good few of the taboo bombshells one should never utter whilst enjoying a Bond BBQ – ‘I’m a vegetarian’ and ‘I voted Green in the last election’ to name a couple.
It could have something to do with the fact that a single semester at Bond costs about as much as an entire degree at any other uni, or that we’re all obsessed with fuelling a cyber meme war with Griftafe, which mainly focuses on their poverty stricken circumstances and socio-economic inferiority. BBQs Bond seems to host enough BBQs during a normal semester week to feed a starving African village. Whether it’s WBTW, an
Regardless, a Bond semester wouldn’t be complete without over-indulging on processed meats cooked by a rotating selection of student leaders, so long live the BBQ…RIP all the animals that didn’t. A perceived air of elitism It could have something to do with the fact that a single semester at Bond costs about as much as an entire degree at any other uni, or that we’re all obsessed with fuelling a cyber meme war with Griftafe, which mainly focuses on their poverty stricken circumstances and socio-economic inferiority. Or, it could just be that an excess of sandstone and pointless high-tech fixtures in the MLC makes one appear rather snooty. But whatever it is, it seems that uttering the social identifier ‘Bondy’ anywhere outside of Bond will earn you deploring looks and snide comments regarding the elitist esteem in which we all apparently regard ourselves. Whether you embrace it or you rip the parking permits off your car for fear of getting keyed in QUT territory, let’s face it: that student ID gets you free entry into Shooters. Enough said, get amongst it. Getting unnecessarily drunk at casual events In my second semester at Bond, I led a campus tour for a group of prospective students from the United States, accompanied by their exchange advisor. Whilst we were wading through a goon-sack strewn Blocks car park, the advisor anxiously enquired as to the accuracy of Bond’s reputation as a “party uni”. Apparently, Bond students have earned international acclaim for our ability to get shitfaced on any day of the week and still receive a diploma at the end of those years. I think the fact that the most popular student events are those that boast subsidised alcohol, open bars and/or buses to Shooters afterwards attests quite nicely to this. As someone who does enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage, I say be proud of your inherited ability to “have a shit one”. A wardrobe of cheap print apparel All you have to do is go to the gym or scan the Bra to see a colourful array of barely merchantable, Asian manufactured Tshirts boasting events that seem to date back to Bond’s birth in the 20th century. I personally seem to have acquired an entire wardrobe of Bond merchandise T-shirts of various origins, most of them way too fugly or oversized to wear anywhere but to bed. Just note that as far as I’m concerned, wearing a failed student association ticket’s shirt is kind of like kicking yourself in the face repeatedly over your lost election, and, just because your shirt’s event is the most far back dating one in your gym class, doesn’t mean you’re any cooler. So when you go home, or on holiday, or simply keep your tent pitched in the Bat Labs and try and ride out a few weeks without sunlight, you’ll have a few things to remind you of your Bond life. See you all for a BBQ to kick off 122.
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GAMSAT
A relieved GAMSAT sitter
On the 24th March 2012 at 4:47pm, a marvelous moment in history occurred. It was the amazing moment when I realised that the torturous nightmare of GAMSAT was finally over - for the year at least! I’m sure anybody who sat the GAMSAT this year, or who has ever sat this awful test, and is now reading this knows the feeling I’m talking about!
going to speak face-to-face with someone who sat it. I’m sure you’ll get the gist of what I’m talking about purely from their facial expression!
If you’re anything like me, you’ll usually have a whinge about End of Semester exams, how much they’re weighted and how unfair it is to cram 12 weeks of information into a two hour exam. Well, End of Sem exams are a breeze compared to GAMSAT.
For those who don’t, I’ll try and elaborate for you….. If you’re anything like me, you’ll usually have a whinge about End of Semester exams, how much they’re weighted and how unfair it is to cram 12 weeks of information into a two hour exam. Well, End of Sem exams are a breeze compared to GAMSAT. In GAMSAT, you’re not only expected to have Year 12 understanding of Chemistry, Biology, and Physics, but university understanding of the first two. You’re not only expected to be able to do mathematics but, for the lucky GAMSAT sitters this year, you’re expected to be able to do logs and calculus without a calculator. Logs and calculus are hard enough with a calculator, let alone without!
It’s a surreal feeling now that GAMSAT is over. For so long it seemed to be the only thing on my mind and the only thing I actually tried to study for. For those who don’t know me, I only ever actually study for something the day or two leading up to a big test, so I surprised myself when I rather unwillingly made myself go into study shutdown for the week leading up to GAMSAT.
You’re not only expected to write two essays in under one hour, but you’re also expected to make sure these essays are purely unique and stand out from the other 10,000 essays that the markers will read on the same topics: Love, and Nanny States. You’re not only expected to be able to read page long comprehension pieces in less than one minute, but you’re also expected to be able to pick the right answer in the same time frame!
So after spending the last week post-GAMSAT catching up with neglected friends, doing absolutely zero uni work and having a few too many late ones with the good old companion vodka; the harsh reality that the world and uni assessment still awaits after GAMSAT has slowly dawned. For now, myself and my fellow GAMSAT sitters put GAMSAT in the back of our minds and wait the not one, but two whole months until results are released in late May, and try to hold out hope that what we produced on March the 24th was enough to seal our fate as doctors!
My friends, GAMSAT should be illegal. It’s a day that comprises of 185 multiple choice questions, two essays, and seven full-on hours of testing. All your bets are pinned on this one test that’ll somehow determine whether or not you’re good enough to be a doctor.
To those in the same circumstance as me, good luck, I truly hope your results are what you need and what you wanted.
To those who are still struggling to understand why you’d be so relieved once the test is over, I suggest
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Examine Your Eating During Exam Time Kate Brady This time of semester comes around so quickly: the dreaded exam block. We know it is coming, yet, it still manages to creep up on us. During this hated time, we either manage to continue our usual eating habits or, sadly, we start eating like the contestants on the Biggest Loser (before the show). It’s alright, we’ve all been there, especially if you live on campus. I understand your frustration with Café Bond. That is why I have categorised foods into ones that will help you study and ones that will not. Foods to avoid • Huge meals, especially at night. They will just make you feel like going to sleep and that is not what you need for a night-time Bat Lab session. • Café Bond in general, but that is a bit hard if you live on campus (I should know - $600 left in Week 12). Food for energy Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, lollies, candy, chips, soft drink, V, Red Bull, Mother, Coke… in moderation, these things can actually help you get through those tough study sessions. They can also serve as motivational rewards for completed revision, and – let’s face it – are pretty much a crucial tool for procrastinators opening the textbook for the first time the night before the exam. Basically, whatever floats your boat to get you through that study session you have been putting off the whole study week. Max Brenner is great for getting you through the week (just make sure you’ve earned the treat!). Make sure you study with friends with cars and who also love Max Brenner. Perhaps the most im-
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portant venue, though, is McDonalds. The breakfast menu will get you through that all-nighter and the fact that it is open 24 hours = winning!
Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, lollies, candy, chips, soft drink, V, Red Bull, Mother, Coke... in moderation, these things can actually help you get through those tough study sessions. Healthy Foods For all of you out there who say they don’t eat junk food during exam week, you are lying. But if you do want to eat healthy to help your brain, here are some good choices: • Vegetables and fruit are great. • For protein, stick to red meat. • If having to eat at Bond, avoid the chicken (unless you want food poisoning to get out of an exam). • Fish will help you remember what you are trying to study and is a great alternative to meat. Just remember to mix it up and drink lots of water! So there it is: a guide to eating during exams. Any food will really do to get you through two weeks of pain, but try and make it a mixture of un-healthy and healthy, and lots of water to keep your brain nourished.
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Executive Drinks 121
Jenna Wong
Friday of Week 11 saw a celebration of student life at Bond University in the University Club. BUSA’s Executive Drinks night is held every semester to acknowledge those actively involved in student life at Bond. It is also an opportunity for BUSA to recognise the outstanding achievements of our clubs, societies, FSA’s and individuals. With over 50 cultural clubs, over 20 sporting clubs and 4 Faculty Student Association; Bond boasts a diverse range of clubs and societies. BUSA is pleased to announce the results of the 121 Executive Drinks Awards. Best Small Event • The State Debate Bond University Progressive and Leftist Society (BUPALS), Bond Young Liberal National Party (YLNP) and Bond Politik. Best Event • The Physical Health Sciences and Medicine Students’ Association.
Best General Staff Member • Sarah Rough Most Outstanding Contribution to Campus Life • Andrew Dibden Service to Students • Callum Wood BUSA would also like to congratulate our newly BUSA-affiliated clubs for 122: Cultural Clubs • Amnesty International • Bond University Progressive and Leftist Society (BUPALS) • Bond Politik • Bond Connect Student Club (BCSC) Sporting Clubs • Bond University Beers, Bowls and Laser Skirmish (BUBBLS) • Bond Mixed Martial Arts Club If you have any further information on how to start a club, please email us!
Best Cultural Club • Bond Investment Group Best FSA • Health Sciences and Medicine Students’ Association Best Sporting Club • Bond University Soccer Club
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For Cultural Clubs: Jenna Wong at clubs@bond. edu.au For Sporting Clubs: Samuel Jones at samuel.jones@ student.bond.edu.au
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WEEK ELEVEN
Photographers: Shaun Rotman (pg. 12) | Zaki Armen (pg. 13) | Jorja Wallace (pg. 13) | Caroline Kovac (pg. 14) | Stuart McKelvie (pg. 15) | Liam Byrne (pg. 16)
Events: Frat Party | WBTW Sport Field Extravaganza | Alumni Student Excellence Awards | Res Dinner: Titanic | Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s For BAfrica | Executive Drinks
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MUSIC ARTS & S W E I REV Burleigh Heads State School Stand Up Comedy Night with Special Guest, ARJ F*CKIN’ BARKER. PARIS FAINT If you had asked me what I was doing on Wednesday night, I would’ve said something to the effect of, “Oh nothing really, I’m just paying $25 to go see some charity stand up comedy at the local primary school, there’s only gonna be like 300 people there.” I would’ve said this just to stop you guys from being super jealous of me. It’s true, I did pay $25 for a charity stand up comedy night... and yes, it was at the local primary school... and it’s a fact, there was only 300 people there (so I was super close to the stage). But there’s no way I would’ve told you in that same speech that the headlining act for the night was to be none other than the freaking hilarious Arj Barker. I KNOW RIGHT!? Who pays $25 to go see Arj Barker perform to an audience of 300? (haha - apart from me...) He was just the best thing. I was ROFLing my AO harder than anyone’s ever ROFLed their AO before. He went on about yoga instructors emerging out of plants, famous Astronomer magazines, gigantic fans that were installed in the school, his tour, his trip to Australia and of course, his guilty pleasure; the enjoyable experience of taking a dump when you have Diarrhoea… (only Arj could get away with that last one I reckon). And of course, it wouldn’t be an Arj gig if at some stage he didn’t mention the fact that he was super spiritual purely because of the fact he’s half Indian.
All in all, the night was an absolute hit, with all comedians bringing the audience (and myself) close to tears with their eclectic and humorous pearls of wisdom. BUT, the best part of the night was yet to come. As we exited the school hall, we spotted Arj in a classroom with all the other comedians. Before I had a chance to hold Emily back, she had already made her way up to the window and had begun to knock, wave and make bedazzled, star struck faces to Arj. To be honest, she looked like the biggest meth dealer on the planet, but it was worth it. He f*#%ing came out. OH MY BALLS. As he opened the door, my heart stopped. It was freaking Arj Barker, the comedian I had admired for years and years. Then he came out and was like “Oh hey there, my name’s Arj”, like it wasn’t a big deal or anything. I was basically crying, Emily was repeatedly saying ‘Hi”, we were absolutely speechless. However, regardless of Emily and my absolute failure at making a good impression, Arj was super nice and offered to get a photo with us before anyone else! (I knoowwww right!!?!?!? I just want to marry him, seriously). At the end of the night, we got to see excellent comedians, watch Arj Barker from three rows back and actually meet the man! Here is a photo to prove this experience! Eat your heart out bitches!
The other comedians that were at the charity event included Joel Bryant, Andrew Nason and James Tinniswood; who are all home grown, absolute jokers. My personal favourite other than Arj, was probably James Tinniswood who was more of a musician-comedian hybrid. Tinniswood performed a multitude of songs titled “Anti-Climax”, “Anne Hathaway” and more. He introduced new words and phrases into my vocabulary including “Love Raptor”, which has actually become my newest nickname courtesy of Emily McGregor. Tinniswood was such a sweetheart when he spoke to the audience as well, his skits were exceptionally well-timed and executed unexpectedly; so the audience absolutely lost their shit when they realised the unprecedented wit.
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MEGAN WASHINGTON J.D.
She’s quirky and cool, fun and unforgettable, crazy and a little kooky. These are some of the many ways to describe Megan Washington: a singer songwriter, dabbling in indie pop and jazz genres. Washington was born in Papua New Guinea and lived there until she was 11 years old. She then moved to Brisbane and enrolled at the Australian School for the Arts, where her whimsical musical passion ensued. She is now based in Melbourne, where she writes and records her sweet tunes. Depending on whom you ask, Washington is loved, loathed or unknown. Performing under the single moniker of ‘Washington,’ Megan Washington and her band released their Clementine EP in 2008. Her newest release, I Believe You Liar (2010), won her an Aria award and it’s not hard to see why. She has been a relative YouTube sensation for the last couple of years, and the subject of much critical acclaim. I have been listening to Clementine on repeat lately, and have been enjoying it thoroughly. I highly recommend that you jump online and listen to this EP while you study at 3am in the morning for that final exam. Washington’s catchy tunes can be exceptionally comforting and enchanting on a late and lonely night, so defs pick up a copy.
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Below are five reasons to give her stuff a go: 1. Her original songs are strikingly honest: It might just be me, but she doesn’t seem to sugar coat anything. Check out her tunes ‘Rich Kids’ and ‘How To Tame Lions’ then you may understand. 2. Her covers are sometimes better than the originals: Check out her Leonardo’s Bride cover of “Even When I’m Sleeping,’ or Britney Spears’ ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time.’ They’re awesome. 3. She is amazing live: This pretty much speaks for itself – the woman can sing! 4. Her music videos are different: Really different. 5. She’s passionate: She loves what she does and it shows. Whether you like her music or not, I’d argue that you have to like her. I have only started listening to Washington recently, and by no means am an expert on her; but I find her compelling and I hope after listening to her you may feel the same too.
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2012 Aussies Bec Thompson
The 2011/2012 surf life saving season wrapped up with the 2012 Aussies held on the Gold Coast. However, the usual hype and excitement of the National championships was not the same after tragedy on the very first day of competition. As many of you may well know, talented 14-yearold surf life saver, Matt Barclay, went missing during the U15 Board Race, on Wednesday last week. Despite Surf Life Saving Australia’s best efforts, unfortunately it wasn’t until the next morning they found his body several beaches north of Kurrawa. Despite doubts as to whether the carnival should continue the event was moved to North Kirra beach, where conditions were much calmer compared to the notoriously extreme conditions of Kurrawa beach. Surf Life Saving Australia was thrown into interrogation, as this has been the third death at the Aussies throughout it’s short history. However, his parents recognising the risks that naturally come with the sport, handled the loss well and did not criticize or condemn SLSA; but rather they solice in the fact their son died doing something he loved.
and friends and family to pay their respects to Matt Barclay. However, there was still fierce competition in all water, beach and boat events. Bondy Jade Neilsen continued her fine form from a successful week in Adelaide last week, where she made the 2012 Olympic team and proved how her pool skills transferred well to the surf. Former Bondy and Iron-Woman, Harriet Brown also performed well in a series of events including the Open Women’s Surf Race and Open Women’s Iron-Woman Race. Thoughts go out to Matt Barclay’s family and friends.
The event did continue, however the atmosphere was not the same. Before the final day of competing commenced on the Sunday, Kurrawa beach filled with thousands of lifesavers
Open at Last!
Hannah West
Last week WBTW was hosted by BUSA on the sports fields to recognise the much awaited re-opening of the grounds. Construction finally commenced last December, after many setbacks relating to both weather and plan changes. While we were not expecting the fields to be open at all this semester, Week 9 notification of the re-opening meant Bus v Law Rugby scheduled to be held at Pizzey Park the following day could be played at Bond. While it seems trivial to some, the sports fields being out of action has been a major issue leading into the competitive season for many of our top sporting teams, as well as trying to organise team trials for Northern University Games held next semester. Up to eight clubs have had to make alternate arrangements, traveling as far as Tallebudgera for trainings several nights a week; or making do like the Rugby Club did by training on the Ornamental Lawns.
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In Week 6 of this semester the BUSA executive took a number of sport field redevelopment concerns to university senior management, who have agreed to amend the fields even further to accommodate an AFLQ sized football oval so the Bullsharks can play home games here at Bond. Significant alterations have to be made to accommodate further development, and the university has been particularly responsive to the needs of our sporting clubs, seeing the value in the extension for students and the university alike. I am proud of all clubs affected by the closure of the fields for such an extended period of time, who have all been gracious and understanding throughout the process. In 122 check your wall planner for all home games from Bond AFL, Rugby and Soccer; as well as our semesterly exhibition matches North v South AFL and Bus v Law Rugby.
Recognising Elite Athletes Jennifer Younger, Bond Sport Officer
Recently The Office of Student Experience in conjunction with the Development Office launched Bond’s Elite Athlete Fund. This fund aims to support student-athletes who compete in a national or international sporting event. We are very excited to announce the first recipient; Annalese Smith has been successful in her application. The Elite Athlete Fund will assist Annalese in competing in the Spain/Italy Handball Cup in June. Annalese has been playing Handball since 2009, and has made some outstanding achievements during this time. She captained Australia’s Inaugural Youth Olympic Team in 2010, and went on to gain selection in the 2011 World Cup Handball Team. Most recently, Annalese has been selected in the Junior Australian Handball Team to compete in the Spain/Italy Cup this year. She will compete against nations such as Russia, Germany and New Zealand. We wish Annalese all the best and will be following her progress in June. For more information on the Elite Athlete Fund visit the Campus Life page on BondSync or contact Jackie Heffernan on 5595 4001 or at jheffern@bond.edu.au.
Bond University beaten with last kick of the game Maximillian Wolthers Bond University suffered a heartbreaking loss against Nerang. As they won by one point after the final whistle, making it 15-14. Bond took to the field at the top of 2nd grade, looking to win their first home game of the year. Defence was the key to the game with Bond looking to contain Nerang who had a bigger pack of forwards. Not one Bondy player backed down and took the game to Nerang. Liam Collins once again took up the challenge and supported by Joey Morris stopped any attack Nerang lead through the forward pack. He was unlucky not to score a try in the first half. Scoring opportunities were hard to come by with Bourkie shaving the upright, with a drop goal attempt to leave the game at 0-0 at the end of the first half, and Bond showing great patience and poised to attack in the second. The second half started with a quicker pace and it was Nerang who gained some momentum to pick and drive finally scoring through the forwards. This spurned Bond back into action and after a missed penalty pinned Nerang to their half. Some strong
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scrumming set the platform that allowed the backs from Bond to attack, and saw Tony Robertson pick up the first of his two tries for the game. Bond led 14-7 with 10 minutes to go and looked to keep the pressure on Nerang. Unfortunately, Bond University were left with one man short after a contentious yellow card was given against Bond. Nerang took advantage of this to score a dubious try after the Nerang player looked to drop the ball over the line. Then with Nerang trailing by two points they seemed to gain a series of penalties that left Bond University only needing to kick the ball out to win the game, when the referee awarded another penalty against Bond. This allowed the Nerang player to score after regulation time to take the win away from Bond. Although the loss will sting for a long time much can be taken from the game and players should be proud of their effort in a tough game. Bond will look to return to the winner’s circle on the 14th when they take on Tweed Heads at home again.
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Extra! Extra!
Read all about Extravaganza Kyle Manning
Last week’s Drama Society production, “Extravaganza: Burlesque”, was so evocative that the skies themselves were moved to tears. The rain stayed at bay for the majority of the spectacular show, but bucketed down during the final musical number. The lights and sound system gave out right on the line “the show must go on”. Weather aside, the show was fantastic. The script, written by student Sophie Manion, was an innovative embodiment of burlesque theatre with a compelling plot and heartfelt characters. Each musical number was cleverly choreographed and skilfully sung, while the story was interesting and spontaneously hilarious. The amphitheatre played stage to a diverse range of acting, singing and dancing talent (the burlesque dancers were unnervingly believable). Tahnee Baker, Jack Harbour, Gabi Sarroff, Danielle Ibanez, Sara Yap, Sam Al-Haddad, Pippa Martino, Dana Heriot, Hugo Monotti and Thomas Bevans should all be congratulated for their stellar performances. I sat down with BUDS president Thomas Bevans who directed the show. K: I understand this was your directorial debut. How did you feel before the show? T: I was freaking out. On the day of the show, I was trying to do everything, including a run-through, putting the set up, getting the costumes. Then I found out that what I had planned might not even work. K: Were you happy with the attendance you received? T: Absolutely! We had planned for 80100 people to come, expecting it to be more like 80 but we filled all of our seats and then some. K: What was the highlight of the show, for you? T: Seeing everything come together after months and months of preparation. I guess my favourite scene was where the actors impersonated Marilyn Monroe, John Lennon, Britney Spears and Michael Jackson. I was worried it wasn’t
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going to work, but the actors pulled it off splendidly. K: I heard there were some issues with the set design. Care to explain? T: Well the day before the show, we went to collect the set and found out that the store had lost most of it. They are still saying that we can’t get a refund but we’ll sort that out soon, hopefully.
The script, written by student Sophie Manion, was an innovative embodiment of burlesque theatre with a compelling plot and heartfelt characters. Each musical number was cleverly choreographed and skilfully sung, while the story was interesting and spontaneously hilarious. K: How did you feel, overall, after the show? T: Relieved. Very, very relieved. It was stressful but in the end very rewarding as well. I was happy with it and have heard great things from people who were there. K: If you had to give a Most Valuable Player Award to someone involved in the production, who would you choose and why? T: If anything, I’ll give a least valuable player award to the weather. After getting through almost the whole play just to rain in the finale? Not cool bro, not cool. K: I know some people feel Bond is fairly unsupportive of the arts. What do you think? T: I think we received some great support. BUSA was very generous with our funding request. I want to establish the Drama Society as an integral part of campus life with a number of wonderful productions and would love to see our audience continue to grow. Stay tuned for our future projects.
Your Guide to Table Manners – For Hosts and Guests!
Ava Anastasia
I believe manners are far sexier on a man than his biceps could ever be. Considering they’re free, manners are an undervalued commodity in modern society. These days, there’s no one to teach us manners in school, so most people rely on their own cultural background as a template for courtesy. It’s quite easy to offend a new acquaintance, especially at the most important of all social gatherings: the dinner party. Before some start to huff and puff, let’s not confuse manners with chivalry; they’re unisex and just as important for women as they are for men. Chivalry encompasses courage, courtesy, honour, justice, and helping the weak - the ideal characteristics of a knight in the Middle Ages. Manners, however, are a social behaviour indicating good breeding. This doesn’t have to mean family money (e.g. Paris Hilton), it means you have been taught to value common courtesy, which is evidently not so common today. Good manners won’t cost you anything, so why not make a better impression on the world? Now, welcome to my dinner party. 1. Never arrive early I would rather a guest be 30 minutes late than 10 minutes early. I don’t want someone knocking on my door while I’m still lighting candles! 2. You can’t leave your hat on Whether it’s a beanie or fedora, remove it when you’re indoors. You don’t look half as cool as you think you do! 3. Try not to bring flowers, unless they’re in a vase When I’m pouring drinks and arranging appetisers, the last thing I need is to look for a vase. 4. Don’t assume your bottle will be consumed It is polite to bring a gift for the host, but many will already have planned the alcoholic menu. If you’re arriving with champagne, ensure it is chilled, as it must be consumed before wine. 5. Never bring a guest without notice A minimum of 24 hours is required; otherwise, don’t count on your guest being fed! 6. Serve from the right, take from the left Hosts, slapping a plate on the table simply won’t do. 7. Work from the outside in Cutlery is to be arranged so the guest can work from the outer to the inner with every course.
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8. Put your knife and fork down during breaks Whether it’s a mouth full of fillet mignon or a conversation, the butt of your knife and fork should be placed at four and seven o’clock, meeting in the middle. 9. The finishing position Although it varies between cultures, Westerners must place their cutlery together, with the butts sitting at four o’clock.
Chivalry encompasses courage, courtesy, honour, justice, and helping the weak - the ideal characteristics of a knight in the Middle Ages. Manners, however, are a social behaviour indicating good breeding.
10. Don’t get pushy Shoving your plate forward is my pet hate. By placing your knife and fork in the finishing position, you have made your message clear enough without resembling a caveman. 11. Don’t touch that plate Never remove a plate from the table until the last person has finished eating. A dinner party shouldn’t be rushed; flavour is to be savoured. 12. There will be no washing up Until guests have departed, do not start doing dishes. There’s nothing that says “get out of my house” quite like it! 13. Girls, you may reapply Lipstick is the only item of makeup that may be touched up at the table. Bring out a compact mirror if you wish, but don’t you dare try to powder! 14. Always say thank you The next day, you must demonstrate your appreciation. A text or a Facebook message will do, or I wouldn’t expect another invitation. 15. Reciprocate You must always return the gesture. If you can’t cook, take them out!
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San Cisco Interview Oliver Kidd
Surely, you’ve been there. You’re sitting at home, thinking to yourself, ‘Why, oh why, did I send that last text message!?’ Your head falls into your hands. It’s over – you know it now. The whole situation was a cluster-fart from the very outset, and it’s all because of your overzealous texting. Whether you’re a seasoned teenage love-rat, or one of those guys making lots of noise by the pool table wearing the oversize singlets at Don’s; we all know the situation. Sometimes those few metres of extra fabric on the singlet won’t even soak up the tears. Yell out! Make a big noise, and finish your beer! That’s better… you’re peacocking, and now everyone knows you’re made of stone. You have no feelings. You’re a man again. On the inside though, there’s still a dull ache underneath all the party-pies.
She – or on the rarest of occasions – he, hasn’t replied and you’ve double texted. Those multiple blue (or green for those iOS4 cave-people) boxes lined up on the iPhone haunt your thoughts in place of what could have been… Finally though, someone has put this experience into song form. San Cisco burst onto the Triple J scene with force. The four-piece from Perth released their sophomore EP ‘Awkward’ in 2011, and since then it’s been on high rotation. Scope spoke with Jordi, the lead singer, last Thursday. How did all of this come about? Jordi: I won a song writing competition, and so I had a few free hours in this studio. Josh and I went in and recorded a song, and it all kind of took off from there. Were you playing shows right after that? We had been playing a few shows, yeah, but not too many.
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When did it become clear that you guys were doing quite well? We were playing a little café in Fremantle. There were a lot of people there. Did you sell it out? Yeah. There were maybe 150 people there. We sold it out.
Touring is awesome. You don’t have to do much. The hard part is knowing when to stop and leave everyone alone for a while. Once you had the songs recorded, did you upload them to the Internet for people to have? No, we decided not to. We burned lots of CDs and sold them at our shows. So people were buying your songs early on? Yeah, the first thing we burned we sold a lot of. You’ve played Big Day Out, Laneway, Big Sound, Pyramid Rock as well as a bunch of tour dates, what’s the best show you’ve done? Big Day Out was really good. We just had just arrived back in Perth that morning and had to get to Big Day Out at, like, 10. We were driving across town – everyone was falling asleep. It was really good though. So you would have been able to meet some pretty huge acts at Big Day Out? Yeah, I met Tyler the Creator. He was really cool, we hung out for a while.
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Same deal at Laneway? I was kicked out of Lanway [laughs]. That’s outrageous. Why? We played pretty early on. Once we got off stage I was removed from the venue because I wasn’t 18 yet. So you didn’t get a chance to see any other acts? No, not really. They were quite exited to remove me. Was that not the case at Big Day Out? I had turned 18 by the time we played BDO. So I could hang around. The rest of the guys stayed behind at Laneway and hung out with some cool people. I had a quiet one. So have you been to the Gold Coast before? I imagine you’re just dying to get here… No, I’ve never been. I’m actually very excited to come. I want to surf at Duranbah and Snapper Rocks. You know them? Yeah, they’re maybe 20 minutes away from Elsewhere, where you’re playing. Do you surf? Have you surfed there? I like to say I surf, for the ladies. Really I’m terrible. Snapper is a good time though; I’ve actually surfed there. The closest I’ve been was Byron Bay. We were recording some stuff there, but I really wanted to surf. I had to negotiate with the rest of the band to get out and hire a surfboard for a while. I was given like 30 minutes [laughs]. Yeah Byron is a great time. Was that a big tour, when you were there? No it was a little string of dates on the East Cost. We have done some huge touring though. It can be draining. What’s the hardest thing about touring? Touring is awesome. You don’t have to do much. The hard part is knowing when to stop and leave everyone alone for a while. Like, thinking in your head, ‘Jordi, you’re being a dick.’ And then you go to bed, you know?
So you haven’t had any major issues touring? No. By the end though everyone just wants a few days to themselves. It’s really fun though. What do you do once you get back from a tour, after your time off? That’s another hard thing. Everyone is at uni, so it can be hard to organise band practice.
Available now contact Hannah on 0413231827.
No exams Vis East 2011/2012 team
The mirror on the corner near the CDC What do you study? I’m the only one not at uni [laughs]. Scarlet studGame of Thrones ies Event Management, Josh studies Graphic Season 2 premiere Design, and Nick studies Sound Engineering. They’re all pretty relevant degrees for being in a band. Yeah Josh has done all of our album art. He’s really good. It makes everything a lot easier because the ideas stay within the band, and exactly how you want them.
Final topic for Love, Sex & Relationships
Are you guys big Arctic Monkeys fans? 505 is on the EP? Yeah I like them. It’s mostly on there because I had been singing it in the shower a lot. It had been stuck in my head for days.
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So you decided to put it on the EP? No, well, it was in the afternoon, and when you’re recording you don’t wanna start something new in the afternoon. We tried to just work on things that could be applied anywhere. Me and the producer Steve Schram [Little Red, Little Birdy and Cat Empire] were doing this sort of experiment with it. By the end we all liked it so we put it on the EP. After you come to the East Coast, do you have any big tour plans that you can announce? Say, around late July? In Byron? Nooo… no, not really [laughs]. We’re all on Uni holidays then so we’ll have some time to get back in the studio. I’m not too sure though.
San Cisco are playing at Elsewhere on the Gold Coast on May 10, 2012. Get down there and forget about all your texting woes.
BOND CLASSIFIEDS ROOM FOR RENT in a 3 bedroom/2 bathroom townhouse in H20 complex. $193.50 a week, fully furnished living and kitchen. Gym/pool/BBQ area situated in the complex. 5 min walk to Market Square, Bond Univeristy and bus stops.
HOT Last week of classes
Send an email to scope.bond@gmail.com with all the relevant details (name, goods/services, contact number etc.), plus your student ID (so we can verify that you’re a student). MAXIMUM 50 WORDS DEADLINE: 4PM MONDAY EACH WEEK SCOPE
| 25| ODDS & ENDS
The impending Splendour line-up announcement
OverGrad NOT Exam week Week 12 exams Broken bones Breathing loudly in silent study areas Rain at the end of Extravaganza Helicopter wake-up at 8am Heavily weighted exams Assignments due in Week 13 Re-learning Week 1 topics for exams Paying extra for sour cream and guacamole for nachos at The Bra
HOT or NOT