Scope Issue 9 Week 1 Sem 121 by Bond University Student Association

Issue 9

Week 1

Sem 121

scope Scope is proudly brought to you by BUSA and a dedicated group of student volunteers.

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contents

SPORT EDITOR | Rebecca Thompson SUB-EDITOR | Linda Woelk PHOTOGRAPHERS Shaun Rotman Liam Byrne Kenny Kagiah Ash Adams SPONSORSHIP Michael ‘Papa’ Penklis

DEADLINES Reservation of space: Sunday 4pm Completed content: Monday 4pm

CONTACT Editor: jorja-lee.wallace@student. bond.edu.au General: scope.bond@gmail.com Phone: 5595 4009

COVER PHOTO: Shaun Rotman

The views and opinions expressed in Scope do not necessarily represent those of the Scope team, the Publi-

facebook.com/scope.bond bondstudents.com

3. Weekly BUSA Report 4. What's a BUSA? 5. How Do I Contribute to Scope? 6. Bond Aid Trip to Samrong, Cambodia 8. Cam-Body-Odour 9. If I Were a Fresher Again... 10. BCHC 11. The Reality of New

Year Resolutions 12. Photos 16. Posters 18. BSA Update 20. There's a First Time for Everything... 21. Odds & Ends 22. Music, Arts & Reviews 24. Sport 26. Posters 28. Haaaave You Met...?

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CONTENTS

FROM THE DESK OF: HENRY NORRIS

editor’s report Welcome back to Bondage Scopealope fans. To the new readers, sit back, relax and enjoy the ride - Scope is the premier student publication that gives you the 411 on student life. To our much loved fans - we hope you enjoy the changes and get as much satisfaction from Scope as you did last year. Our first edition is a little late. No, not because of Illegally Bond shenanigans (I wish), but because of the dreaded spinning wheel of death. As per usual, my love affair with Mac turned sour in the early hours of the morning. Maybe it was the rain, or perhaps my taste in music. Whatever the cause, the fact that there is still a Mac in the office is a testament to my self-control (yes apparently I have some). The next hurdle of course is Ricoh. I really shouldn’t juggle two men... Perhaps they’re a little jealous. I wouldn’t blame Ricoh for that. He gets the abuse and Mac gets the love (upon completion of Scope of course). Printed or not, this week you will find Scope is packed to the rafters with content. From holiday travel tales to hilarious recounts of 091 - if there’s not something here for you, get off your arse and write next week. Until next week, xx

Bondies old and new, undergraduate and postgraduate, Australian and international, nerds and jocks: welcome to Bond for 2012!

it’s also about an incredibly diverse and engaged student body and a student experience which will keep you entertained and stimulated.

My name is Henry Norris and I am the President of the Bond University Student Association (BUSA). If you’ve picked up Scope and are reading this article, then you’ve already started accessing the range of services which BUSA provides to students on a daily basis. From Scope, to Pub Crawl, to advocacy and education, BUSA works to make your student experience here at Bond the best it possibly can be. We are an elected group of 17 students and together work to provide Bond students with services in the areas of education, recreation and sport. BUSA also oversees the operation of our fantastic sporting and cultural clubs and societies here at Bond, which now numbers over 70!

Throughout your time at Bond, you’ll find that there are a lot of opportunities to join clubs and societies in an executive capacity and to help organise and expand them. Becoming an executive in a club or a society is a great way to give back to the Bond community and will also equip you with useful skills in leadership, organisation and event management which you may be able to draw upon in your future career.

The student experience here is an integral part of what makes Bond the best place to study in Australia. As you’ll discover at Club Sign On Day this Friday, there is a diverse range of active clubs and societies at Bond, from the Bond University United Nations Student Association (BUUNSA) to the Bond University Rugby Club (BURC) to the Beer Appreciation and Social Intercourse Club (BASIC). As you’ll see in the “What’s On” email every week, there’s always a range of exciting events to help keep us busy outside of our studies. From the famous Faculty Student Association events of Illegally Bond (LSA), Palaver (BSA), White House (HSA) and Havana Nights (HMSA), to the smaller club events such as weekly sporting competitions and cultural meetings. So Bond isn’t just about the fasttracked degrees and small class sizes;

If you make an effort to become involved, you’ll quickly become immersed in the Bond student experience. If you’re the kind of person who likes to get involved in social events and extra-curricular activities, the Student Activities Membership (“SAM”) is your golden ticket to the Bond student experience. It’s only $110 per semester and gives you free or subsidised tickets to student events as well as full membership to the Bond Gym. Your SAM also pays for things like Thursday Night at Don’s, Wednesday by the Water and the stunning piece of work you have in your hot little hands right now. If you want to keep in the loop about all of the events and activities taking place on campus at Bond, then make sure you sign up to BondSync. It’s an online community for all of Bond’s clubs and societies and allows you to have the student experience at your fingertips. See you on Friday for Club Sign on Day and Pubcrawl. Bring on the revenge of the nerds!

Jorja Wallace

r o t i d E e h t o t s r e t t Le ? the Scope team r fo k c a b d e du.au Fe g to say? student.bond.e @ e c lla a .w Have somethin e e -l a the Editor at jorj Send a letter to ay DUE: 4pm Mond | s rd o w 0 0 1 Max SCOPE

BUSA

The Bond University Student Association for 2011/2012

1. "WHAT'S A BUSA?" 2. "WHERE CAN I BUY MY BUSA?" 3. "WHO'S SAM?" 4. "IS SAM MATES WITH DON?" 1. A group of 18 volunteers who are nocturnal, caffeine addicted and remind you of delicious chocolate. 2. You can’t. Unless you really want to... 3. Your best friend at Bond. You can party, study and work out with him. 4. Yes. SAM (such a top bloke) gets you free entry to Don’s. So you’re new. It’s okay, we know it’s confusing. Let’s start from the top. We can’t help but giggle when we are undoubtedly asked in O-Week “Where can we buy a BUSA?”… I’m sorry, you can’t. In defense of all the 121 ‘freshers’ commencing this semester – you’re a top bunch, but here is a debrief on a few acronyms which you can casually throw around when you’re at the Bra over dinner. Lets start there…

gets you a snag at WBTW). Meet SAM on the back page of this publication. WBTW: Wednesday by the Water. The BBQ you get for free when you have your SAM each Wednesday at 12pm! FSA: There are four Faculty Student Associations. HSA – Humanities Students’ Association, LSA – Law Students’ Association, BSA – Business Students’ Association and HMSA – Health and Medicine Student Association. They run events, revision seminars, help you find a tutor, advocate on your behalf and much more.

Bra: Brasserie. You eat here. Formally known as Café Bond therefore may also be called ‘The Caf’.

CSOD: Club Sign on Day! It’s on Friday, and is fairly self-explanatory. Go see B.A.S.I.C. (Beer Appreciation and Social Intercourse Club) for a sneaky A.M beverage, or see BIG (Bond Investment Group) for some advice. Finally, BUFFS (Bond University Free Food Society) can tell you where the free foods at!

BUSA: Bond University Student Association. A group of volunteer students who cannot be purchased.

I hope this helps you transition from whatever you were in your past life, to a true university student. Bond style.

SAM: is not a person. It’s a Student Activity Membership, and gets you good stuff around campus (Gym membership, cheaper event tickets, entry to Dons’, pays for revision seminars, and

With love,

SCOPE

BUSA

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scope CONTRIBUTING TO

WHAT IS SCOPE? Scope is your weekly student magazine, produced by students for students. You can pick up your very own copy each week from Wednesday by the Water (WBTW) or the BUSA Office; or view it online from the Scope Facebook profile. If you’re not already friends with Scope of FB – you should be. Here you will find past editions of Scope, event photos, student information and the ability to participate in the much loved ‘Hot or Not’ status.

by 4pm Monday (NOT NEGOTIATIABLE) of the week you’d like to be published.

DO I HAVE TO BE A JOURNALISM STUDENT TO WRITE FOR SCOPE? No, you definitely do not have to be studying Journalism to send in submissions for Scope. The Scope team welcomes content from anyone and everyone at Bond. In fact, some of the funniest articles and most loved pieces have been produced by non-Journalism students. Whether you’re in your first semester, or last semester - we would love to hear from you!

CAN I ADVERTISE IN SCOPE? For students: Advertising can be found in Scope in two ways: 1. FSAs, clubs and societies can reserve poster spaces to promote their events free of charge. 2. FSAs, clubs, societies and students may use the Classifieds section to sell, search or promote items or events. This section is also free of charge, but has a 50 word limit.

WHAT CAN I WRITE ABOUT? Topics are endless, provided they are not defamatory or incredibly inappropriate. We love a bit of controversy, so if you’ve got an opinion speak up. It could be on anything from politics to sex, funny to informative or even completely and utterly random. As long as you’ve got the passion and drive to complete it and get it in on time – we want it. Also note submissions to Scope are not limited to just ‘writing’. Perhaps you’ve documented an issue in photos, written a poem or sketched a masterpiece. As long as you can get it to us via e-mail or USB, and it’s of a publishing standard; we’re interested. WHO SHOULD I SEND MY CONTENT TO? For all general submissions and enquiries: send through an e-mail with your submission attached in an editable format to scope.bond@ gmail.com. From here submissions will be distributed between the three arms of the Scope team: Features, MAR and Sport. For specific enquiries and letters to the Editor: send an e-mail to Jorja Wallace at jorja-lee. wallace@student.bond.edu.au WHEN IS CONTENT DUE? Contributing to Scope is a two-step process: 1. Send an e-mail to scope.bond@gmail.com to reserve space for your submission (maximum two pages), by 4pm Sunday of the week you’d like to be published. 2. Send through all completed content in an editable format to scope.bond@gmail.com

This process ensures your submission will included in the draft layout, and provides the Scope team with ample time to edit all content. The final edit and design is completed every Tuesday, so meeting deadlines is essential. Don’t forget student volunteers produce Scope, and missing deadlines affects their timetables and plans!

For businesses: Please contact the BUSA Sponsorship Director, Michael ‘Papa’ Penklis for price lists and further information. HOW CAN I JOIN THE SCOPE TEAM? Applications for positions will be called when needed. Currently all spots on the editorial team are filled, however Scope is always looking for enthusiastic and reliable students to join the photography team. If you are interested and have access to or own a DSLR, please contact Jorja at jorja-lee.wallace@student. bond.edu.au Scope is also looking for two film and TV students to fill a new and exciting position on the team, which will also overlap with the Yearbook committee. If you think this sounds like you, contact Jorja at jorja-lee.wallace@student.bond.edu.au ***** To all our dedicated Scope fans – thank-you for your support in 2011 and we look forward to a fantastic new year. If you’re new to Scope – welcome. We hope to keep you as an avid reader for the duration of your degree! If there’s anything you’d like to see, or have any comments, suggestions or criticisms – send an e-mail directly to Jorja. We appreciate your feedback. After all, it is your magazine. P.S. Keep your eyes peeled this semester for a call out for positions to be filled on the Yearbook committee.

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FEATURES

Bond Aid Trip to Samrong, Cambodia

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Brendan Gilmore I think it’s fair to say that the Bond Aid group’s first impressions upon reaching the isolated region of Samrong, in the far North of Cambodia, were bleak. Numerous warnings about the real danger posed by landmines, malaria and dysentry, not to mention listening to Tina’s bad jokes, were enough to put us all a little on edge. These difficulties were accentuated when we realised that there were very few people who spoke English in any capacity beyond an enthusiastic ‘hello,’ and our knowledge of Khmer was virtually non-existent.

We left for work the first morning with what was thought to be a good grasp of what we would each be doing, suffice to say we had no idea. Our team of 14 Bond students were split into three groups. Our medicine students – James, Tina, Lavanya, Kathleen and John – went to work in the local hospital. The remainder of us were divided between the local school – Katie, Roisin, Laura, Maddie and Jordie – and the local orphanage – Kristy, Jean, Faith and I. We left for work the first morning with what was thought to be a good grasp of what we would each be doing, suffice to say we had no idea. The Hospital Within days, those at the hospital had seen amputations without the aid of anaesthetic and child births in rooms that were anything but sterile and contained multiple land mine victims. An insight into the culture prevalent among hospital staff was given when a storage room was discovered containing unused vital supplies many years old. Upon seeing these stark contrasts to Australia, I wondered whether facing such difficulties would cause some unhappiness amongst our medicine students or deter them from working in the hospital. However, it appeared to have the opposite effect. I would go so far as to speak for them and say that their desire to work in the medical profession was only strengthened from their work in Cambodia.

The School The school presented a unique challenge because it was not only the children that we would be teaching English to, but also the teachers and principal too. It was assumed that those working at the school would be assisting the teachers, however it we soon realised that this was not to be as they would leave the room as soon as the group entered. Progress was slow at first, but by the end of the month it was clear that ground was being made with our girls working tirelessly to improve the students’ writing, reading and speaking. Words cannot describe the difference made between the start and finish of our stay at the Samrong school. We all fell in love with the kids who would swarm us at every chance, proffering gifts of flowers to us in exchange for the girls’ hair, and Roisin was even lucky enough to receive a homemade guitar. It became apparent that the love we felt for the children was mutual. The Orphanage The orphanage was not what we expected. Rather than meeting children who were angry or resentful about the hand life had dealt them, we soon discovered that the 16 children were some of the happiest we had ever encountered. Material possessions were few and far between and no child was seen wearing more than two different shirts or pants. Not one day was the same as we varied from teaching the orphans English, building the garden, playing volleyball or swimming and laughing as a certain few ‘exfoliated’ with duck poo from the river banks. At the outset, few of us expected the emotional ties we would soon make with the orphans, and in no way did we anticipate the sadness and guilt experienced as we left for our lives back in Australia. The Bond Aid trip to Samrong, Cambodia, was one of the most eye-opening experiences I, and any of us have undergone. It will forever remind each of us how truly lucky we are to have such privileged lives, never enduring the pain of food insecurity and malnutrition. I encourage you to consider taking part in similar projects as they really are a life changing experience. Special thanks to Tina Rizkallah, Cassie Jeavons and James Coldham for organising everything so smoothly and enabling us to enjoy every moment.

Photos: Madeline Wardleworth

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FEATURES

CAM-BODY-ODOUR

Bonnie Whitehead

My avid Scope fans, I feel like some of us got off to a bad start last year. Somewhere along the line, between expressing my thoughts and feelings on certain demographics of the Bond community, I may have lost a few friends. Accordingly, I decided that to kick off this semester I would even things out between all of us and dedicate this space to making defamatory remarks about myself. So, whatever few friends I have left after 113, I’m prepared to lose them now too.

It even got to the point where, come Day 17, I was offered a pair of toenail clippers by a Buddhist monk whilst walking by a monastery after he noticed the build up of whiteboard ink under my fingernails. I’ve sat down today and thought to myself, “what’s the most humiliating thing I’ve done lately?” The trend of this week’s Scope has focused on our (depressingly) brief holiday period; therefore, I thought the summer break would be a good place to start. On that note, my holidays… I, Bonnie Whitehead, did not take a shower for the entire threeweek duration of my holiday period. Bombshell dropped. I’m going to leave you another few lines of space to just let that one sink in before I give you any context. …

to pretend personal hygiene hadn’t completely died with my dignity by dousing myself with a bucket of cold water. I was several times escorted by security from expensive hotels after being found washing my clothes in the bathroom sink with hand soap. It even got to the point where, come Day 17, I was offered a pair of toenail clippers by a Buddhist monk whilst walking by a monastery after he noticed the build up of whiteboard ink under my fingernails. Context aside, facts are facts. I brought in the New Year resembling an unkempt homeless person, and I’ve come clean to everyone with the dirt on that side of myself (excuse my hilarious dual-pronged pun). You now all have grounds to wholeheartedly take the piss and, let’s face it, I won’t be able to do shit about it. Despite my joy in becoming reacquainted with showering upon my arrival back at the blocks (not that anyone is going to vouch for hot water reliability in A Block), I will take this opportunity to plug a few unexpected benefits which came from living in a lasting state of filth. Firstly, public transport. I’ve never been so assured of having an entire bus seat to myself, because turns out people would rather squat in the aisle or perch several to a seat then sit next to someone who smells like the city dump. Secondly, I think I just saved enough money on fake tan, water and electricity bills with my glowing brown layers of dirt that the money could feed the entire slum I was living in. So, if social alienation and financial stinginess aren’t reasons enough to forgo your next shower, I don’t know what are. Anyway, the truth has been laid bare. To all my remaining friends out there, it’s been nice knowing you. To everyone else whose sole first impression of me is this display of public self-deprecation, well, you get that in life. Just for good merit, I’ll leave you with the toenail clippers image again.

OK, that’s enough. The truth is I was actually working overseas, in an area where running water is about as easy to come by as a good meal from the Bra. Every couple days or so I attempted

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IF I WERE A FRES HER AGAIN... Bondies welcome to 2012, or as we refer to it here – 121! To all the freshers: welcome aboard! I have been set the task of reflecting upon my time as a fresher, way back in 091, and passing on some tips for making the most of your time whilst studying in Paradise. This task bought with it a lot of pressure because there is a lot of information to pass on, so I enlisted the help of some of Bonds true legacies. Together we bring to you 40 tips for integrating into the brilliant Bond lifestyle. Enjoy responsibly: 1. Live on campus. 2. Be single. 3. Play a sport (even if it is touch club on the beers). 4. GO TO THE BEACH MORE. 5. Don’t speak unless spoken to. 6. Be a slut. You’ll get invited to more stuff. 7. See the Gold Coast (4 years later I never made it to the springs, didn’t play in the park with the bungee thing, didn’t go to Draculas, didn’t find the nude beach etc. etc.). 8. Respect BUSA. 9. Meet the lecturers in Week 1 (it saves sucking ass in Week 13). 10. Disregard road rules whilst competing in Bondy 500. 11. Hook up. Seriously, hook up. 12. Disregard paragraph 8. 13. Go to every single event. 14. Get a part time job in the industry you are hoping to get employed in after graduation (even if you aren’t getting paid). 15. Drink when told to. 16. DO A SEMESTER ABROAD. 17. Move off campus. 18. Do a tour de France, the Australian version. 19. Keep your Wall Planners. They make good decoration for your room and have all the birthdays/events/good nights written down so as to not be forgotten. 20. Wear condoms/make him wear a condom. 21. Meet Mummy (head of security) as soon as possible. 22. Compete in Northern Uni Games/Australian Uni Games. 23. Grow a Mo in Movember. 24. Go out in Week 12. Alcohol + exam anxiety = madness.

Andrew Dennis

# 12. Disregard paragraph 8. 25. Spend some time yarning to the Don’s security guards - they are dull as fuck, but well worth the small talk when you line up. 26. Spend some time yarning to the Don’s bar staff – they’re actually good blokes/chicks, and you might snag yourself a free pint or game of pool now and then. 27. Join B.A.S.I.C. 28. Always say hello to John the cleaner. 29. Nude up. Seriously, nude up. (“Everyone at Bond knew I had a little wang, and I still got laid more than 90% of the single guys there - I cannot adequately emphasise the importance of nuding up,” - Sam Warriner (Not me, I have a massive wang)). 30. Perform the pelicopter frequently when complying with advice in paragraph 29. 31. Swim the lake. 32. Swim the fountain. 33. Start a food fight at the Bra. 34. Perform advice in paragraph 31 while complying with paragraph 29. 35. Get contact details for anyone worth keeping in touch with - the university turns over its student base so quickly that friends are quite easy to lose. 36. Travel the world without paying for any accommodation. 37. Withdraw from Friday classes (however, I trust none of you were stupid enough to actually enrol in those classes…) 38. Pull an all-nighter. There is no other way to finish that Week 9 assignment. 39. Read Scope. 40. Have a shit one.

Disclaimer: I do not endorse any unlawful activity whilst engaging in fulfillment of this list.

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FEATURES

Rosie Viner

On the 22nd of December over 70 people went home feeling exhausted, emotionally drained and having had four of the best days of their life so far. One half comprised of Bond students, who gave up the first few days of their summer holidays to dedicate themselves to the Bond Children’s Holiday Camp, a unique opportunity available to no other University students in Australia. The other half of the camp comprised of 25 wonderful children with special needs, aged 6-13 each with their own beautiful, and at times challenging personalities.

The camp provides much needed respite for the families of the children and would not be possible without the generous donations of Bond University and The Sony Foundation.

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Just to give you a sneak peak… imagine: 5am starts, Pool obstacle courses, arts & crafts, jumping castles, scavenger hunts, Sea World, The Aqua Duck, The ‘Bond Zoo’, Face Painting, Fire Brigade, Talent Show, Disco, Movie Night and Mini Olympics... Those involved in the 2011 camp really were inspiring, and many students have described the experience as life changing, whether it be challenging, eye opening or fun. The camp provides much needed respite for the families of the children and would not be possible without the generous donations of Bond University and The Sony Foundation. Please extend your interest in becoming involved at Club Sign on Day, Friday Week 1 or contact Rosie Viner (rosie.viner@student. bond.edu.au). The video of the 2011 camp is available for all to see on Your website: www.bondchidlrensholidaycamp.org

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The Reality of New Year Resolutions Shannan Carroll

The New Year ritual is a rather standardised one. We wait in anticipation for the fireworks, kiss our prince/princess charming at the appointed hour, down another glass of champagne, and come to regret the whole experience in the coming hours as our heads catch up with our pace of consumption.

Tip 4: Make the goals realistic, simply because otherwise there’s really no point having them.

But the tradition doesn’t end there.

Tip 6: Take a note from children’s literature – the turtle won, didn’t he? (Yes, I just went there). There are no (or not usually) prizes for being the first to accomplish your New Year goals, so replace bare minimum achievement with exceeded expectations.

For most of us, thoughts of McDonalds, bacon and eggs, and other long-lauded hangover cures are replaced with thoughts of how we truly can make this New Year ‘happier’ than the last. We determine to resolve those issues we had found a myriad of justifications to delay tackling the year before; we subscribe to the naive belief that when the clock struck 12am, our lives, just like Cinderella’s, changed irrevocably. Most of us – upstanding citizens that we are - will begin the year by adopting the socially responsible practice of recycling; we will take the failed endeavours of the twelve months prior, and fashion them into future pursuits. This year, I’m going to: drink less; exercise more; study – even just a little. Admittedly, sometimes we splash out and set our sights on a shiny, new end goal. This year, I’m going to: adopt a puppy; travel; learn to scuba-dive. Yet, even as we ponder the possibility, and potential rewards, of meeting these objectives, we acknowledge the limited probability that we will maintain our resolve until February, let along next year’s twelfth month festivities. How many of us have already reneged on our 2012 commitments? I could have conducted a poll, but didn’t. Instead, I will offer you a few little hints to defy the presupposed statistical majority and be one of the few who actually meets the benchmark for 2012 Here goes... Tip 1: Write down your goals; we all know having it written in black and white makes it seem like a more serious commitment – take the humble marriage certificate. As an additional benefit, you won’t forget your self-made promises. Tip 2: Tell somebody about your plans – preferably somebody who will never let you forget your failure if you do, indeed, fail. There is no motivational force quite like the prospect of prolonged and intensive haranguing. Tip 3: If you drink alcohol, do not wait until New Years Eve to set your resolutions – for obvious reasons.

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Tip 5: Divide the bigger goals into smaller ones – a tried and true approach to successful self-management that really requires no explanation.

Tip 7: Individualise your aims. Strategic Management will teach you there are numerous actual theories that prove this is effective. I could elaborate, but I won’t – I’ll spare those who’ve been there and avoid ruining the surprise for those yet to enjoy this core university experience.

We wait in anticipation for the fireworks, kiss our prince/princess charming at the appointed hour, down another glass of champagne, and come to regret the whole experience in the coming hours as our heads catch up with our pace of consumption Tip 8: Avoid excuses. And don’t pretend to yourself that there is a difference between ‘reasons’ and excuses. Tip 9: Develop a reward/penalty system. (You could, if you wanted to, but you’d be edging perilously close to overly pedantic). Tip 10: If, despite all of these handy hints, you realise in three days, three weeks, or three months time that you’ve wavered from the revolutionary path, buy a compass and start to make your way back that same day. Put simply: make any changes you need to make as the invariable issues of 2012 arise. Unlike Cinderella, we don’t slip into a new pair of shoes and find ourselves wholly different people as the clock shifts from one day to the next; what you could fix in 2013, you could fix now, so do it. Remember Tip 8. Welcome to 2012.

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Global Management Challenge 2012

What is the Global Management Challenge? The Global Management Challenge is the largest strategy and business competition in the world. Participants will be given a virtual company in each round to manage for 5 quarters. Participants must make a series of informed decisions in order to try to achieve the highest share price for their company. concerning

Participants four

major

will

areas

required of

their

make

company:

decisions marketing,

production, finance and human resources.

How Can I Enter? Simply get team of 3 to 5 people together and email your details including a team name, team leader and all the team membersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; names and email addresses to competitions@bondbsa.com.au We recommend at least one student in the team is proficient in the use of Excel to ensure the best performance.

Why Should I Enter? The Global Management Challenge is a prestigious competition that is world renowned. Should your team make it beyond the national final, you will compete in Kiev, Ukraine, against the top teams from around the world. The biggest appeal is that it's a free competition for students that you can heavily rely upon in interviews for grad positions, as well as the advantages press coverage for making the final stages. Important Dates

Brought to you by:

Registration closes on 20th of January 2012. The first round begins in February and national final in March For more information on the Global Management Challenge email

BACK TO BUSINESS BSA

The Bond University Business Students’ Association would like to welcome you to the New Year and an exciting semester to come. The BSA has planned a busy 121 so be sure to take note of upcoming events, ticket sales and competition entry dates.

Business Breakfast – 2nd February, Week 3 As is customary, the BSA will be providing a free breakfast for business students at 9:30am outside the Business Faculty. Start the day on the right note, and come along for a pre-Palaver feed and mingle with your learned peers. Palaver – 2nd February, Week 3 You had better have a fancy pair of dancing shoes and an amiable relationship with the doorman, because on Thursday of Week 3 the BSA presents to you Palaver: Studio 54 Disco. The chosen Manhattan haunt of 1970’s celebrities such as Michael Jackson, Salvidor Dali and Mick Jagger, set the standard for an entire era’s party scene. And now, it comes to Bond. Get yourself a ticket in Week 3, arrange your finest ensemble, refine your air of exclusivity and get ready to dance the night away. Traffic Light Party – 14th February, Week 5 This Valentines Day, Cupid’s bow arm is going to be working overdrive. For the first time the BSA is bringing you Traffic Light Party. If you’re a traffic light virgin, the guidelines are simple: dressing in red means stop, orange will require further enquiry (and perhaps some persuasion) and green means go, go, go! It’s on at Varsity Tavern on Valentines Day, so stay tuned for ticket sales and get your signals ready!

Palaver in Paradise 113

Palaver Candyland 112

Competitions The semester in competitions: • The Global Management Challenge is fast approaching with registration closing on the 20th of January. • The DCM Blue Lake Trading Places Portfolio Competition is a finance competition coming late in the semester. • For marketing students, the Google Online Marketing Challenge is currently open for registration; however it is not held until next semester. • IT students can soon register for the Microsoft Imagine Cup. More information on upcoming competitions will be released soon. Keep an eye out for a new BSA competition making its debut this semester. If you have any enquires please don’t hesitate to contact Matt Boyce at competitions@ bondbsa.com.au.

The Haunting of Palaver 111

Grudge Week – Week 9 The traditional Grudge Week between Business and Law is back again in Week 9. This semester the historic grudge is to be celebrated and battled out in new and creative ways. Hopefully, with some luck and perhaps a blue moon, there might even be a competition involved.

Bus v Law 113

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There’s a First Time for Everything James Mackechnie

Have you ever thought you were going to die? Like, actually? It’s true what people say about your life flashing before your eyes when your time is up. That is exactly how I felt in a taxi when I was travelling in Manila, Philippines (which, by the way, apparently has no road rules whatsoever). After almost being run over on the pedestrian crossing, I got into a car with no seatbelts and was immediately asked to lock my door. With cars continually cutting us off and avoiding collision by some miracle of God, the most real feeling I have ever had reverberated throughout my entire body. I couldn’t work out what it was. Adrenaline? Fear? Maybe even excitement? It was then that I realised there really is a first time for everything - I, James Mackechnie, was physically in another country. Dwelling too long on this simple yet intriguing thought, I was snapped back into the present by the driver swerving to dodge a stray dog on the motorway. Following an overnight stay at my brother’s girlfriend’s house (of which he had the nerve to tell me not to make a face at when I saw it because he thinks I’m a pretty boy), I was on the first flight to Bohol – the home of what seems like hundreds of aunties, uncles and cousins of mine. I guess it’s bound to happen when your mum is one of nine. Upon learning it is also the most conservative island in the entire country, I started to regret wearing pink board shorts that rose well above the knee. It didn’t take me long to notice that every vehicle, whether a tricycle or a taxi, was plastered with Bible scriptures and glammed up with rosary beads. Not long after my flight I was picked up in my cousin’s truck, which had two seats in the front and a large tray at the back for passengers to sit in. My brothers were already inside and I couldn’t help but laugh at the primitive method of transport, which I would later learn was extremely fun (especially when you took turns standing up on a bumpy road and seeing how long you could last without holding on). When you travel there you see three things: Coca-Cola signs at every corner (note that a bottle of Coke costs roughly 30 cents, which only further perpetuated my already unhealthy addic-

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tion), San Miguel advertisements (Philippino beer) and the locals staring with disdain at us foreigners. Finally we arrived at the house. I was immediately ravaged by mosquitoes, which have left me with scabs and scars I still wear today. The first thing I noticed was an exotic rooster that was being trained for the cock fights… If its competitor didn’t kill it, I surely would soon enough as I discovered it does not crow only at the crack of dawn, but all through the night. Petty worries aside, I was finally introduced to my very large family and I couldn’t have been happier to meet such a great group of people. After the next few days we then went to Boracay – the most touristy part of the Philippines. I could tell you all about it, but instead, I’m leaving it up to you to do your research if you want an unforgettable and thrifty holiday. Forget about Bali, Fiji and Hawaii etc. because they are all inferior in every way. Adto na ko (‘goodbye’ in one of the Philippino dialects, just in case you didn’t get that).

The first thing I noticed was an exotic rooster that was being trained for the cock fights… If its competitor didn’t kill it, I surely would soon enough as I discovered it does not crow only at the crack of dawn, but all through the night.

|20| FEATURES

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HOT Pub Crawl CSOD O-Week International talent Nek minut Flaring nostrils when laughing Birthday sex Delirium Outsider talent Rainy day playlists Petting zoos Return of the Bra NOT Capacity at Don’s Torrential rain Sober all-nighters in Week 1 Spinning wheel of death Not getting birthday sex on your birthday

BOND CLASSIFIEDS CALL FOR APPLICATIONS BUSA and maintaining the Exploration Society bank The Exploration Society is currently open to any account. applications for the following positions: E-mail: phillipagoddard@gmail.com President Main role: act as liaison between BUSA and the WANT TO ADVERTISE? Exploration Society. Ideally, the president should also be the first line of communication with any Are you selling, looking for, interested in, running an companies the Exploration Society hopes to work event etc. etc.? Then this section is for you! with for any events that semester It’s free for all students, all you have to do is send Media & Technology an email to scope.bond@gmail.com with all the relRequires some knowledge of web design and evant details (name, goods/services, contact number computers. May also assist in poster creation and etc.), plus your student ID (so we can verify that other creative initiatives. you’re a student). Marketing & Promotions Bond FSAs/clubs/societies are welcome to use this In charge of printing and distributing posters and section to advertise their events PROVIDED they do flyers, and encouraging an Exploration Society not spam it. presence at Wednesday by the Water. Finance Responsible for collecting reimbursements from

MAXIMUM 50 WORDS DEADLINE: 4PM MONDAY EACH WEEK SCOPE

| 21| ODDS & ENDS

Missing out on Pub Crawl Wizards Sports Field redevelopment

HOT or NOT

MUSIC ARTS & S W E I REV

brett Gornall, ezra gillard & emily mcgregor

Introducing: LANKSTA Brett Gornall, aka LANKSTA, has always had a passion for electronic music. The love for the art crystallized in 2009, when Brett started hitting the DJ decks. Born in the small town of Kurri Kurri, and growing up in an even smaller town of Yeppoon; Brett gained his fame when he moved to Brisbane city last year, and has since made some big waves in the electronic music scene. Brett has been gathering a considerable fan base in Brisbane, landing a resident position with Praxis Australia (the host of the annual Manifest festival). He has supported huge acts including Kid Kenobi, Propatingz, Unsub, Broken Toy, Aston Shuffle, Blatwax, Scorb and many more. In addition to this, he has had a lot of interest from international acts

such as Big Alliance Recordings and monk3ylogic through his soundcloud page. LANKSTA’s major influences include: Unconscious Minds, Atomic Drop, Bad Tango, Guau, Wardian, Beatman Ludmilla, Firefarm, Bubu Breaks etc. Focusing on hard-hitting groovy Electro & Psy Breaks, Brett really gets dance-floors pumping. So if you like-a-tha-shweet-beats, then LANKSTA is one to follow. We are expecting big things from LANKSTA this year, so keep your eyes (and ears) peeled! For bookings contact Brett on thelanksa@gmail.com

Reinventing Radio – An evening with Ira Glass Two weeks into the Christmas break I wasn’t having a very constructive holiday. I had effectively vitiated any regular liver functions and transplanted half a pig into my stomach. An arterial exercise but hardly one that is intellectual. I felt like discovering something other than an incredible tolerance for gin. Such mea culpas can be depressing considering that I spent three weeks hunting down one specific book in Perth only to read the first chapter and stop. Catching wind of the appearance of one of the great American broadcasters at the Astor Theatre, I set out to purchase tickets before I left for semester 121. Within moments of sitting down and listening to Ira Glass’s opening sentence in a space lit only by his iPad, I knew I could tick off that last box on my holiday checklist.

JONATHAN DODD

Ira Glass first began working for public radio when he was 19 and has been finetuning his charming storytelling methods ever since. He currently hosts the popular radio program, “This American Life”, which is broadcasted worldwide and available in podcast format. Each show is centralised around a weekly theme and features collected stories from those at NPR, contributing journalists, and the general public. Glass’s ability to weave and push a story

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to an audience translates impeccably into his live show. Throughout the show, he alternated between sharing his own experiences in the radio industry and analysing the methodology behind each episode of This American Life. For each subject, Glass would masterfully mix in anecdotes and music that emphasised each point that he was making at the time. The show highlighted the strengths and limitations of purely audible entertainment mediums and how such shortcomings can be overcome with techniques such as smart mixing. Glass truly has this down to an art. Much like his show, Glass was engaging and enlightening with his witty and cheeky demeanour. He was never didactic when revealing any of the production processes that make his radio shows so compelling and garnered a heavy supply of laughs from the audience and myself. I doubt that Mr. Glass will be returning to our shores any time soon so I think it’d be a little silly to recommend attending next time he visits. I do however recommend that you visit thisamericanlife.org and start listening if you don’t already. The stories may be less relevant to Australians but they’re nonetheless entertaining. My mum likes it, at least.

Arctic Monkeys @ da Riverstage Devastating reverb, crashing bodies and enough sweat to cause a Sham-Wow grief. What more though could you expect from an Arctic Monkeys concert? For those that don’t know them, the Arctic Monkeys are the definition of Indie. The band consists of: Alex Turner (Vocals and guitar), Matt Helders (Drums), Jamie Cook (Guitar), and Nick O’Malley (Bass). Formed in Sheffield, England with the release of their debut album ‘Whatever people say I am, that’s what I’m not’ in 2006, they immediately shot to the top. Their first LP sold millions. They got famous. Then they came to Australia.

Over the past couple of months the arctic Monkeys have been touring around the world to promote the release of their 4th album entitled ‘Suck it and See’. Last Saturday they graced the Riverstage in Brisbane to complete their Australian tour and oh yes, peeps be gettin moist. I was lucky enough to be attend this fine example of art… this is how it shook down: Upon arriving I noticed a congealed mass of what could simply be described as hipsters. An extraordinary lack of primary colours, many rolled up jeans and peer-pressured smoking if I’ve ever seen it… my mother would have hated it. I felt a bit out of place as I wasn’t 15, although I look it.

james fitchett With my red shirt and navy blue shorts I was probably the brightest bopper there. Gotta froth vintage. After entering the gates things brightened up as a few 40-year-olds rocked up boosting the crowd age average to about 19. All was well. The supporting bands included ‘Violent Soho’ who came on and screamed for a bit, followed by ‘Miles Kane’ who came on and mooched off of Alex Turner’s fame for a bit. Once he wrapped up, and the girl who could at max be 16 finished blowing smoke from her joint in my face – as some old mate was profusely sweating on me – all I could do was wait. Then. Well then they came... and so did I. With his melting British accent and hair that looked like it was dipped in a fairy floss machine, Alex began the show with a couple of notes from his guitar. With that, he had the crowd hooked. They were going absolutely mental. Opening with a collision of tracks chosen from all albums, the Riverstage came to life as the clump of people bopped up, down, around and transformed into a full blown human washing machine, lubricated by sweat, blood, and tears. Let me reiterate, there were many sweaty humans. It was so sweaty.

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Hawt. Completely ignoring people’s well being, the parents of my unborn children played hits such as ‘I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor’ and ‘Brianstorm’ so close together I almost passed out. However, it was as if the Arctic Monkeys became suddenly aware of the fantastic trauma they were causing when they toned things down a little by playing their slower songs in between their driven heart racer tracks. Alex would occasionally take time to charm the crowd by asking the obvious questions such as ‘Are we having a good time?’ To which everyone screamed ‘yeah!’ The band would then seem pleased with this response and continue to melt my face. Although, like most enjoyable things, it was over all too quickly, and before I even got the chance to take my pants off they were done. The band came on for their encore which ended with possibly my favourite song ‘505’. With a wave from the band members they suavely left the stage and walked out of my life for a couple more years. Farewell guys, and don’t forget there is always a place down under for you... in my heart.

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SPORTING LIFE AT BOND Upon moving out of home, or even just finishing high school or becoming caught up in uni life; one often regrettably neglects their sporting and fitness commitments. However with the opportunities available at Bond, sport and fitness themselves become part of the unique Bond experience. • Bond Social Teams – Bond boasts many sporting clubs including rowing, netball, beach volleyball, cheerleading, kite-surfing… These are the perfect opportunity to pursue your current sport or try something new, all while meeting new people. • Australian University Games – happening once a year in September (to be held in Adelaide in 2012) the weeklong sporting carnival will test your endurance and stamina both on the sports field and on the party scene. Although sometimes thought of as a second “Schoolies”, there is high-level competition in many of the sports and Bond prides itself on holding the Doug Ellis (per capita champion university) Trophy. Alongside this, Bond hopes to defend their reigning title at Northern Uni Games, to be held in Lismore in early July this year.

Bec Thompson • Community Sport – Due to the coastal location and (supposedly) hot climate, water sports are extremely popular in the Gold Coast. Furthermore the GC is internationally recognised for surf beaches, thus the perfect location to try surfing, body boarding, surf sports or even body surfing. Aside from this, if you’re a Victorian and sick of the rugby being incorrectly labelled “football”, there are many AFL clubs along the coast. • Fitness classes @ Bond – the fitness classes cater for all despite vast differences in intensity and type. All are fun and friendly classes which are sure to get you motivated. The morning boxing classes with Richard have a legacy of commitment attached and many once started, never fail to miss a class. While the Super Circuit classes are not for the faint-hearted, and attendees never fail to walk out dripping in sweat and exhausted. There is also Zumba, pilates, yoga and Fusion classes which, despite popular belief ,are not just for the girls. • Res Wars – A friendly (sort-of…) competition every Wednesday night, encompassing many different sports from dodge ball to soccer, undoubtedly there will be a sport in which you will shine – even if you haven’t discovered it yet, such as Ultimate Frisbee. Scope Sport hopes to keep you updated on upcoming sporting competitions and past results. Be sure to get involved in Bond’s sporting life in one way or another! If you’d like to contribute to Scope Sport, please send an e-mail to rebecca.thompson@student. bond.edu.au

Res Wars Semester one each year is always the ‘biggest, the best and something no one has ever seen before’. With Res Wars, led by your Campus Life Res Fellows Alan and Hannah, intending to do just that – it’s sure to be one hell of an introduction for all our new and returning students.

portunity to have a laugh at your fellow Bondies; it’s a night not to be missed!

This semester’s Res Wars has brought back the golden oldies (that is, mixed netball, dodgeball, soccer and beach volleyball). All because, generally, these are the sports you guys turn up to! But in the spirit of change and improvement – Hannah, Jackie and I decided it was time for some new Res Wars challenges.

Movie Night Getting hot and sweaty isn’t all that we promote in the Campus Life Office. This semester, in Week 13 SWOTVAC – look forward to a movie night in your PJ’s in the Bond University Club.

This semester – you all can look forward to the introduction of the Bond Swimming Carnival. But have no fear if you’re not a dolphin, or don’t look too crash hot in a pair of budgie smugglers – because this is Res Wars Swimming Carnival and we like to do things just a little bit differently. You can say goodbye to Res Wars Trivia. In its place will be the Res Wars Gaming Night. A mix of everything fun, academic, and with the op-

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Also this semester you will witness the overhaul of Res Wars Sports Carnival. This year, say goodbye to the egg, the spoon, the sack and the run, because Sports Carnival is getting a facelift!

On v Off On v Off is on again this semester! Stay tuned for the sports that will be played in Weeks 5 and 9 as the Barbarians take on their on-campus foes in a ‘friendly’ game or two. Remember to come see us at Club Sign on Day this semester to sign up for your Res Wars shirt. $20 new students, $10 for all returning students. Yours in campus life, Alan White.

The Fitness Fad Jayde de Bondt

It happens annually at this time of year, after all of the Christmas cheer… Before the clock has ticked past midnight spurring us into 2012, many - like those before them - make promises to themselves (otherwise known as New Year’s resolutions). These promises vary, but often aim for the same end goal: ‘to get fit.’ Sadly, the majority of people will never achieve their optimum fitness level this year. Why? Well for starters, the notion of ‘getting fit’ is an exceptionally broad concept that does not highlight any specific system or aspect of the body a person wants to improve. In turn, to stay motivated to achieve this somewhat unrealistic goal is difficult even for the strong willed, and considering that you had to rely on the notion of a New Year’s resolution to finally improve or change habits, it’s likely that you’re not.

steps as using a diary and creating a routine are just that - steps to help you achieve your goals. If you do them it does not necessarily mean you will improve the areas of fitness you have been working on, but it may make the journey to getting fitter a little easier. Like anything the road to improving one’s personal health really is up to you. The ball really is in your court. Every person has the capacity to be incredibly brilliant or exceptionally self-destructive. In 2012 hopefully you exceed your own expectations, find your inner brilliance and never walk the path of giving up.

Obviously, improving your fitness level is not easy. It takes a lot of effort and at times the little voice inside your head is probably questioning if it is all worth it. I argue that it is. However, there are more realistic and achievable ways to improve one’s ‘general fitness’ without jeopardising your study or social life, and which do not merely focus on the end goal: ‘to get fit’. Firstly, starting now, discard this New Year’s resolution. Buy or re-use an old note-pad or diary and write down areas that you want to improve within the notion of ‘fitness’. This could be anything from improving cardiovascular endurance, to strengthening core muscles. As long as you clearly and specifically define what you want to work on. Once you have one or two areas that you want to improve (these are your new New Year’s resolutions) then you need to sit down and plan what you are going to do each day to achieve these. Get someone to help you out planning your exercises: a personal trainer, a sporty friend or even a family member who will further motivate you to achieve your new goals. As well as this, make sure you set a time each day where you go out and do these exercises; it could be 8am or 7pm…but set a routine. One of the key factors in improving an area of fitness is routine. If you have a routine, eventually you can exercise without even thinking about it. It becomes a natural and normal aspect of your day (which means you’re one step closer to achieving the elusive resolution). As part of your routine write down what you have done each day and how you felt in the same notepad or diary you wrote your initial goals in. Not only does it allow you to keep track of what you have done each week, but it also gives you a sense of achievement when looking back and reading about all the positive changes you have made. Finally, get a group of people to exercise with. Whether it is a training squad, friendship group, class, parent, grandparent or sibling - find someone to motivate you. Even going to the gym by yourself but being surrounded by other unfit randoms will keep you determined. Obviously, improving your fitness level is not easy. It takes a lot of effort and at times the little voice inside your head is probably questioning if it is all worth it. I argue that it is. To live a healthy and balanced lifestyle is something to treasure, but like everything it needs to be nurtured and continually worked on. Such

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H A A A A VE Y O U M E T . . . ? Ideal date location and companion? With you. We’d get a perfectly cooked sausage from Wednesday by the Water, followed by an intimate gym session where we can bathe in each others fluids. If I like how that date went I might even take you to Don’s on Thursday - I’ll pay your entry. Do you call a snail without a shell naked or homeless? Homeless - but I’d tell it to go live in the Undergraduate Lounge (if Sam and Elliot are okay with it). What food would you be and why? Rice, because I’m cheap, easy and have a variety of uses. What is your study motto? A dexie a day keeps the fails away.

Name: SAM Age: 23 Degree: Certificate 3 in Hair and Beauty, Majoring in Short Back and Sides Beginning Semester: 891 Hometown: Gold Coast FB Relationship Status: Single, but I’ll go home with you for $110 Star Sign: Cancer, because I eat away at your bank account

A genie grants you three wishes - what are they and why? 1) Have more friends. 2) People to stop hatin’ on me because I’m coming into their lives. 3) Getting my count over 2500 - yeah I get around. Do you judge other people for their past indiscretions? Yes. I judge people solely on the number of SAM stickers on their SIDs. If you could swap bodies with anyone at Bond for a day, who would it be and why? Don: he’s got all the beer! Choose: never washing your bed sheets again, or never washing your towel again. Sheets, I mean I don’t use my own anyway ;) Weirdest place you’ve had a sexual encounter? Getting a handjob from BUSA in the O-Week tent.

NEXT WEEK: Nominate yourself or dob in someone else to scope.bond@gmail.com