The era of the lone wolf

Words BLASE GRINNER

If knowing someone has your back as you enter the ‘unknown’ would you take the first step?

No one has it all figured out on this journey we call LIFE, yet why do men still try to ‘trudge and grind’ through it like the lone wolf, feeling as though the weight of the world needs to be carried on his shoulders alone?

Is it because words like ‘help, support, advice, mentors, coaches’… have meant that you’re broken or less of a man if you speak about your concerns? That the words ‘retreat’ and ‘surrender’ stand for defeated, NOT going within oneself?

I invite you to ask yourself, your mates/brothers and/or men in your life these questions. Is it because you’re afraid that others will abandon you if they know about your past?

Is it because you never had a ‘father figure’, (nor he, your father, for that matter) lead you into the unknown?

Is it because each time your heart has felt pain you made the ‘amour and walls’ more impenetrable?

Is it because of fear that if you go into the ‘unknown’ you’re scared of what you’ll find… meaning that you may lose your ‘identity’ that you worked so hard to create?

Or is it because you feel like you’ll be banished, outcast from your friends and/or family and rejected because the unknown may change you?

Leaving you feeling unloved, not belonging and alone?… Isn’t that a lone wolf?

Well bro, I was a HUGE f###, yes, to all of these four years ago. And I also had very low self-worth, belief and confidence due to the weight I was carrying from the questionable actions I had undertaken in the past. Even heavier was the shame and guilt I suppressed.

Though on the outside it looked like I was crushing life; supervisor running a $140 million project, beautiful partner, heaps of mates, fit… yet so unfulfilled.

This all changed when I had men have my back, and right by my side to step into the unknown – BECAUSE what I came to realise is that… it wasn’t the load that was weighing me down… it was the way I was carrying it ON MY OWN.

How did I get to the mindset to step off the edge?

It took rock bottom, back against the wall, back door burnt for me to grit my teeth and finally say to myself … F### THIS, there has to be another way… so I went searching.

Want to go far… you go in a pack.

Brother this is your invitation to take the step, that your head is stopping YET your heart is yearning for. COURAGE ISN’T THE ABSENCE OF FEAR. And you don’t need to be ‘in a hole of despair’ to improve, better yourself or grow as a man. THIS SIR, for myself is a daily practice now.

What’s the best thing that could happen when you leave the precipice?

BLASE GRINNER is a Transformational Coach, Men’s Group Innovator, Speaker and Retreat Facilitator. www.blasegrinner.com /blasegrinner