Napoleon: [Stops pacing.] No. What am I? A British-studies student? I am a conquerer! Sentry: Alright, alright. Just thought I’d ask. Next question. Napoleon: [Checks his pocket watch and sits down on a crate.] Is this man known for his art? Sentry: No. Napoleon: Is he known for his writing? Sentry: No. What other special committees do you have? Napoleon: What is this, an interview? Can we get back to the game? Sentry: Just curious, that’s all. I’m just as exiled as you are. Napoleon: [Stands up and starts pacing.] I have special committees for matters in propaganda, wardrobe, art, and food. Have I ever met this man? Sentry: No. What’s the special committee on food for? Napoleon: They are in charge of catering events and providing me with buttery sauces, rich soufflé, and croissant. Sentry: Well now that takes the biscuit! Napoleon: Pardon? Sentry: I mean that special committee beats out the rest of the lot. Napoleon: Yes. It was always one of my favorite. Now, would I recognize this man’s image if he came to the island? Sentry: Yes. Napoleon: Is this man rather large? Sentry: Um— Well, I don’t know. Napoleon: Well, then how can you say I’d recognize his image if you can’t even confirm what his image is? Sentry: It’s his size I can’t confirm. Napoleon: If you, to an English man, don’t know his size, then how can you possibly expect me, a French man, to know his image?
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