THE FAMILY NEWSLETTER A Monthly Publication of The Family:
People Helping People Project
November 2016
In All Things, Give Thanks!
Bill and Joe were walking through a field. Suddenly, they saw an angry bull. Terrified, they ran towards the nearest fence. The bull chased them in a mad rampage and they soon realized that they wouldn’t be able to outrun the terrifying animal. Bill shouted at Joe – “You come from a Christian family. Pray to God for us!” Joe replied, “I come from a Christian family but I’m not a Christian. I’ve never prayed a prayer in public before.” Bill said, “Never mind, just pray what your family prays! We’re in deep trouble here!” “All right,” Joe said, “I’ll say the only prayer I know, the one my father used to repeat at the dinner table: ‘O Lord, for what we are about to receive, make us truly thankful.’” TF —http://hweehweetan.com/gratitude-the-attitude-that-will-change-your-life/
Expressing
gratitude opens us to love. Gratitude is a portal into the unmanifested. Gratitude frees us from our Ego Addicted False Self. Gratitude opens our hearts to the experience of love which is our true identity. I was shocked when a deeply hurt female cocaine addict said, “Dr. Allen, in the crack house, I have come to realize that the addict who is grateful for one day sober, soon surrenders and moves on to sobriety.” Expressing gratitude for life, family, job, etc., frees us to be who we are. Gratitude is the humble acceptance and acknowledgment of God’s love for us. Surrender prevents complaining and empowers us to act positively with gratitude. Without gratitude there is no surrender and our negativity leads to despair and frustration. Even if we are successful in addressing the problem, we are left empty, unsettled, and looking for the next problem because our consciousness is identified with thought and problem solving. TF —Dr. David Allen, Daily Discovery: A Devotional, March 7
In this Issue page 3 • Don’t Give Up, Give Thanks! • Lectio Divina
front page • In All Things, Give Thanks!
• Expressing Gratitude page 2
• Making the Shift from Anger to Gratitude
back page
• THE FAMILY - Meeting Times & Places
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LEADING ISSUE Gratitude Making the Shift from
Anger to Gratitude Hurricane Matthew was a lesson in human emotions. Shock. Anger. Sadness. Fear. Shame. Gratitude. Shock at the extent of the damage. Anger at being helpless in the face of the devastation. Sadness at having lost not only one’s home or business but the security it represented. Fear at what the future may now hold. Shame at having to stand in line for “ice” or live with others or depend on NGOs for “basic necessities.” And gratitude, yes, gratitude, because it “could have been worse.”
True Gratitude, then, Is the doorway into love. How do we make the shift from shock, anger, sadness, fear, shame to true gratitude?
Here are eleven steps to guide you. 1. Take stock of where your heart is: Is it in fear (anger, fear, shame) or love (compassion, forgiveness, gratitude)? 2. Tell yourself that you can make the shift to love, to gratitude.
3. Take time out and go to a quiet place. 4. Breathe deeply for one minute with your eyes closed. This breathing will produce “Alpha” waves which have a calming effect on your body. Relaxation of the body melts anger. 5. Be silent. External silence leads to internal silence. 6. Say this simple prayer and open yourself to the Power who is greater than yourself: “Lord, have mercy.
My life is unmanageable and I need a power greater than myself. I need You.” 7. Think of someone who loved you unconditionally as a child or in your present life. This is your stream of love. 8. Think of a place where you felt peace and love. This is a thin space where Heaven and Earth meet, e.g. home, beach, park.
Unfortunately, gratitude that is relative is only a platitude if it doesn’t change us. True gratitude changes us. As we change, our behavior changes and that’s what transforms our circumstances. Practicing gratitude allows us to experience our deepest self in the good, the true, and the beautiful. Being thankful for the things we often take for granted changes our anger and shame to love. True gratitude, then, is the doorway into love. thankful or blessed. 10. Plan to forgive “Hurricane Matthew” and whoever else hurt you during this time. We only forgive when we are ready to be healed. “Forgiveness releases the prisoner; and that prisoner is us!” 11. Think of someone to whom you can now show love or care. TF
9. Write down three things for which you are grateful,
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FEATURE:
Don’t Give Up...
Give Thanks!
Joan, a very pleasant young lady, was referred to us because she was suffering from a serious type of Leukemia. On her first day in The Family, she shared that she was robbed on the weekend; and all the money she had saved up for her consultation in Miami with a Leukemia expert was stolen. The thieves also stole her computer which she had hoped to use to communicate with her nine-year-old daughter through Skype. She said these losses were painful and made her feel hopeless. But the most difficult experience for her was when her daughter would hold her at night and ask if the robbers were coming back. The group was moved by Joan’s pain and the pathos of her situation. At the next group meeting, I noticed that Joan was a little brighter. I asked her how she was doing. She said she was extremely encouraged this week because some members of The Family visited her, replaced the money and bought her a new computer. Now she would be able to make the trip to Miami for the consultation. Joan became a regular member of the group. Sometimes she was feeling very up, but many times, as the disease progressed, she would feel very weak and tired. But,
despite her illness, she would always seek to encourage people. In fact, when persons talked about suicide, she would look at them and say calmly, “You don’t know how valuable life is. You only realize how valuable your life and health is when you’re faced with a terminal illness, and there’s nothing you can do.” As time went on, Joan became weaker and was admitted to hospital. There, she faced excruciating pain and, with her relatives and friends around her, she died. The group was deeply moved by her death, and together we went to the funeral. We were blessed by the minister’s sermon, who shared that Joan was somebody who faced life positively, even though she had to live through the negativity of a severe, debilitating medical illness. Joan is gone, but when things are tense in the group, her smiling face reminds us not to give up but to be thankful for what we do have. She helped us to realize that death may destroy our life but it cannot destroy a relationship. Joan changed her mind. She changed her life and she changed her world. TF
ABOUT THE FAMILY People Helping People
Dr. David Allen Founder & Director
THE FAMILY: PEOPLE HELPING PEOPLE is a program of free, community based therapy groups for adults and adolescents throughout New Providence, using qualified therapists. We are building The Bahamas and reaching out to the world. Our Vision: Helping Our People Everywhere Our Mission: People Helping People If you want to help or share in this great work, ■ Attend a FAMILY group ■ Join our training program to become a Group Facilitator ■ Make a donation via Scotiabank: 70375-3001-602 Donations are under the direction of a distinguished accounting firm.
If you want to: · Join a Family Group / Become a Group Facilitator: Contact the Family Office at 698-0155 · Start a Family Group/Request Dr. Allen’s Material: Contact Dr. Allen (Renascence) at 327-8918/9 · Book Dr. Allen: Email <dfallen43@gmail.com> · Request the Monthly Newsletter: Email <info@familyhelpingpeople.com>
Lectio Divina
Read. Ponder. Pray.
Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.
—Psalm 107:1
VISION: (Helping H.o.p.e. our people EVERYWHERE) Mission: People Helping People
FAMILY MEETING PLACES AND TIMES Family
Location
Day
Time
WillaMae Pratt Ctr.
Fox Hill
Monday
3:30 – 5:00pm
Simpson Penn Ctr.
Fox Hill
Monday
3:30 – 5:00pm
Collins Ave. Teens
7th Terr. Collins Ave.
Monday & Thursday
4:00 – 5:30pm
Glad Tidings
Kemp Rd.
Monday
6:00 - 8:00pm
Warfare Group
Collins Ave.
Monday
6:00 – 7:30pm
Great Commission
Wulff Rd.
Tuesday
11:00 – 12:30pm
East St. Gospel Chapel
East St.
Wednesday
4:00 – 6:00pm
Her Majesty’s Prison
Fox Hill
Wednesday
9:00 – 10:30am
NPCC
Blake Rd.
Wednesday
6:30 – 8:00pm
Thursday
8:45 – 11:00am
Guidance Counselors
Mable Walker Professional Ctr.
Evangelistic Temple
Collins Ave.
Thursday
4:00 – 5:30pm
St. Gregory’s Church
Carmichael Rd.
Thursday
6:30 – 8:00pm
NPCC
Blake Rd.
Thursday
6:00 – 7:30pm
Blake Rd.
Saturday
9:00 – 12:00pm
NPCC – Facilitator Training ■ Private Groups
■ Adult & Adolescent Groups
FAMILY OFFICE People Helping People THE 7th Terrace, Collins Ave
Come and join a family, find people who are ready to help you and train you to help others!
1 (242) 698-0155 or 1 (242) 676-8619 or thefamilyphp@gmail.com Office Hours: 9am - 5pm Mon, Tue, Thu, Fri 9am - 4pm Wed Visit us on the web at www.familyhelpingpeople.com
■ Adult Groups
Partners
Templeton World Charity Foundation Renascence Institute International If you’d like to support THE FAMILY and share in this transformational work, we’d be happy to receive your donations via Scotiabank 70375-3001-602 for more information, contact us at 327-8718/9 or dfallen43@gmail.com